> Played By The Hand
>  by Jhoira
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Told By The Heart
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Looking down at her hand again, Octavia tried to move it into the position to grip her cello neck. Panting heavily her hand trembled from the strain. After a full minute of trying, willing, and even mentally threatening her hand to make the note, for nothing. She growled as she gave up shaking her head as she made the disobedient hand into a fist. Bringing it down on the nearby music stand. The stand crashed loudly to the floor and skittered off to the corner of the room. She was going to leave it there until a scowling face popped its head into the music room.

Cranky Doodle scowled as he saw something less problematic but more irritating. He had been expecting an injury or kids roughhousing, thankfully that wasn't the case, it just seemed to be one girl making the issue. Though Cranky Doodle was surprised that it was Octavia, by all measures a well-behaved student. "Octavia. Is there a reason you're damaging school property?"

Despite the fact that Cranky Doodle was a teacher, with a reputation for being ill-tempered Octavia couldn't stop herself from snapping at him. "Because I'm angry, isn't that obvious!?" At the moment she didn't care if she got detention or whatever she got, she just wanted to vent.

Cranky Doodle crossed his arms, his eyes narrowing as he took a step into the room. "Uh-huh, and do you have a reason I shouldn't give you detention for both the damaged music stand and your attitude?" He had a reputation for being ill-tempered, which even he had to admit was true. But he didn't make a habit of kicking people while they were down, he'd experienced that too much in his own life.

Ocatia took a moment, legitimately surprised by the measured reaction. She considered continuing to give Cranky Doodle attitude just to get punished so she didn't have to go home to her parents who, while well-intentioned, were too just trying to give her false hope really. By the doctor's own reports her last surgery was really her last chance. There were technically other treatments, but from experimental to almost a non-existent success rate she was done. She looked up at Cranky Doodle, taking a deep breath and then letting it out as a sigh. "I... Can't play my cello anymore."

"What do you mean?"

Motioning to her hand Octavia explained. "I got a... An injury. And I can't play the cello anymore. I can't grasp it properly. I can only play like... Half the notes. I can't play music anymore."

Cranky Doodle frowned and shook his head. His eyes lighting up gently. "Of course you can."

Octavia turned violently, cocking her hand back to throw her cello bow at him before she got control of herself. The flash of rage that had flown through her just barely weaker than her desire to not assault someone. But only just, it was likely that Cranky Doodle wouldn't get a second chance. "I just said I can only play half the notes! Do you realize how many songs I can't play!? There goes my future!"

Taking a long moment Cranky Doodle met Octavia's eyes, before silently entering the room and closing the door. Octavia braced herself for a lecture about yelling at teachers, trying to will herself to calm down so she could keep control but it never came. Cranky Doodle silently made his way over to the standing piano against the wall and sat down. Taking a deep breath he placed his fingers on the keys and started to play.

Octavia was so astonished that her jaw quite literally dropped as she heard Cranky Doodle start to play perfectly. But after a minute Octavia shifted, there was something... Wrong. Octavia couldn't say why, Cranky Doodle was playing the notes perfectly, but they just weren't... Working. Though he only played for about five minutes she recognized the beginning of the piece. It was a perfectly executed rendition of Beethoven's Hammerklavier, one of the hardest pieces in all of classical music. But for some reason, Octavia was bothered by it. She hadn't felt what she normally felt when listening to expert classical music.

"That was... Very impressive Mr. Cranky Doodle. Ok, very, very impressive. But you're making my point! I can't do that!" She motioned to her hand. She could give Cranky Doodle a bit more credit as he obviously was a musician but... He was teaching drivers ed and other subjects. She looked down at his hands. "Are... Were your hands injured?"

Cranky Doodle let out a harsh, bitter laugh. "I wish." Octavia's eyes snapped back up to his full of rage again. "I can't make music." Octavia twitched visibly as she tried to keep from exploding, but Cranky Doodle remained fully calm, motioning back to the piano. "What were you thinking while I played?"

"Uh... That it was perfect." She didn't want to disparage him but it was technically perfect, and that was about all she could say about it.

Cranky Doodle nodded. "Exactly. It wasn't moving, it wasn't beautiful, it wasn't meaningful. It was technically perfect. But it wasn't music." Octavia stared as Cranky Doodle went on, his eyes shifting to the piano. "I have, my entire life, wanted to play. But I don't have that spark. I don't have that indefinable something that turns sound, into music." He made his way back to the door. "I think we can forget about the music stand, this time."

As Cranky Doodle walked out he shook his head. Thinking back on all those wasted years of perfecting his ability to play the piano. Believing that if he could just do it all perfectly he'd be able to overcome that last hurdle and make music. He had perfected it, and to many, that was enough. But he had never been able to turn sound, into music. He did smile, however, when, as he walked away, he heard not sound coming from the music room. He heard music.