Roommate Woes
“What’s it like to have a griffon for a roommate, anyway?” Frosty abruptly asked.
Sandbar glanced up from his lunch, caught off guard by the question. He looked at the expectant earth pony for a moment, conscious of how long that moment was rapidly becoming, as he hurriedly sought some kind of response. “What…what makes you think it’s any different from a pony roommate?” he finally asked.
Frosty shrugged his greyish magenta shoulders. “I dunno, I guess the fact he’s a griffon and not a pony?” he said it in a perfectly innocuous tone, a genuine attempt to answer Sandbar’s counter. He still looked expectantly at Sandbar though.
Sandbar knew that look. He and Frosty were what Silverstream had once dubbed as “acquaintances,” as they didn’t associate one-on-one all that often, but both being locals, they had known each other for many years. They had even both attended the same primary school, even though Frosty was a year older and thereby had always been a class level higher than him, at least until they came to the School of Friendship (which they had both shared a laugh over how they were in the same school yet again). So Sandbar had learned long ago that the look Frosty was giving him now was one that meant Frosty wasn’t going to be dissuaded from getting an answer too easily.
“Well…you know…good and all,” Sandbar responded without going into too much detail. “I mean, Gallus and I are friends and all.”
“Which is all well and good,” Frosty said with a grin. He shrugged again. “I just was wondering though. Because, you know, my roommate? He’s a great guy and all too, but he does drive me up the wall sometimes all the little annoying things he does. Especially some of the messes he leaves in our dorm.” He shuddered. “I never knew a pegasus could shed so many feathers in a week and still have plenty more where those came from.” He chuckled though and glanced back at Sandbar. “So I was just wondering if you ever had the same sort of problems.”
Sandbar glanced around sheepishly, glad that the girls had roped Gallus into helping them with a school project this afternoon and couldn’t join them for lunch. “Well…I suppose there is some culture clash between me and Gallus, occasionally,” he admitted quietly, afraid of being overheard. He didn’t want this getting taken out of context. “But we’re both cool with it.”
“Oh c’mon, there’s gotta be something he does that bugs you at least occasionally,” Frosty prompted. “Roommates are like siblings, after all. You still love them to death, but there are still times when you want to throw them out a window, am I right?”
Sandbar had a vision of his own baby sister getting thrown out a window pop unbidden into his mind and he shuddered. “Well…I don’t know about the throwing them out a window bit,” he admitted, biting his lip. He had another thought. “Besides, Gallus can fly. So what good would that do?”
Frosty shook his head in good-humor, ruffling his not-quite pure white mane. “You’re so good-natured, Sandbar,” he said with a grin. “Of course you wouldn’t even stop to think if you have any pet peeves against your roommate, no matter who or what he was.” He started back in on his lunch.
“Well, I didn’t say that.” The words were out of Sandbar’s mouth before it even registered he was speaking them.
But of course by then the damage was already done. Frosty paused in the bite of salad he was about to eat then glanced up at him with that look on his face again, silently prodding Sandbar with a metaphorical stick that said ‘do tell.’
Biting his lip again but not seeing any good way out of it now, Sandbar quickly glanced around the school cafeteria, confirming there was absolutely no sign of Gallus or anyone who might overhear and tell Gallus about this anywhere nearby. He then leaned closer and motioned for Frosty to do so as well. “Okay, so…he’s a griffon, you know?” he whispered. “That does come with…well…quirks.”
Frosty arched an eyebrow. “How do you mean?” he whispered back.
Sandbar fidgeted uncomfortably. “Well…think about it. What is a griffon anyway?”
Frosty frowned, not sure if he followed. “Well…as I understand it, they’re basically creatures with the heads of a bird and butts of a cat or lion or something, right?”
Sandbar, however, nodded in agreement. “Exactly,” he said. He winced to himself. “So let’s just say that…sometimes? I wish Gallus thought a bit more with the bird end of himself than the cat end.”
Sandbar was the sort of pony who loved to curl up on the floor with the Sunday paper and just go through and read it from cover to cover while also sipping a warm cup of hot chocolate. He could do this for potentially an hour or more without interruption and be perfectly content. He was in the middle of doing so while lounging on the floor of their dorm when Gallus came in and demonstrated that he was not such a creature himself.
“Hey,” the blue griffon greeted as he strolled in. “I’m bored. Wanna go hang out or something?”
“Sure, just as soon as I finish with the paper,” Sandbar said, picking up his mug to sip from before looking back at the paper he had spread out on the floor in front of him.
Gallus looked down at him for a long moment. Then, moving deliberately, he then stepped onto the newspaper on the floor and plopped himself down on top of it, curling his paws under him in a sort of loaf position that almost completely covered the newspaper now under him, and gave Sandbar a very pointed and expectant look.
With narrowed eyes, Sandbar set down his mug and sighed. “I guess I’m done now,” he relented.
Gallus smiled cheekily.
It had been a long but rewarding day attending classes today, and Sandbar was ready to call it a day. He still had some homework he would need to do before the evening was over, but for now, he just wanted to go into his dorm, sit down, and let his brain unwind a little. Maybe he chat it up with Gallus, who he expected would already be in there doing the same thing too.
Approaching the door to his room, he happily pushed it open. “Hey Gallus, I’m back from claaaaaAAAAAAH!”
He had just time enough to see the griffon all coiled up and ready to spring before being slammed backwards by a wall of blue feathery fluff as Gallus pounced on him with enough force that they both went skidded back out of the room and across the floor of the corridor outside.
“Now how’s that for an enthusiastic greeting?” Gallus asked proudly once they had come to a stop, the griffon having pinned him to the floor.
Sandbar just glared back at him. “Sometimes I wish you’d just buy me one of those ‘I missed you’ cards instead,” he groused instead.
Sandbar was working on some schoolwork peacefully at his desk when he heard a faint popping and tearing noise behind him. Alarmed, he twisted around to see Gallus had reared up and was gradually running his talons down the sides of the window curtains, the sharp claws slowly ripping up the fabric they were made out of.
“Gallus!” Sandbar declared, throwing his hooves onto the sides of his head. “How many times have I told you not to do that?!”
“Whaaaat?” Gallus snapped back and held out one paw of talons. “I gotta sharpen these things on something!”
Sandbar rolled his eyes, frustrated. “What, do we need to get you a scratching post or something?”
Gallus mulled it over a second, glancing from the fraying curtains to his talons. “Well, it certainly couldn’t hurt,” he relented finally, like it made no difference to him.
Sandbar just groaned, thumping his head on the desk in front of him.
Saturdays were always nice because, with usually no classes on that day, it was a day to either get caught up on schoolwork if you had fallen behind, or just chill for the whole day if you wanted. This particular Saturday, however, Gallus and Sandbar were both spending it lounging in their respective bunkbeds, thumbing through comic books. They spent several minutes doing this until Sandbar felt something batting at his tail, which he currently had hanging over the edge of the top bunk.
Hearing Gallus shuffling around below him in time with the batting though, it didn’t take long for Sandbar to put two with two. He’s batting at my tail like it’s a cat toy, he thought to himself, unable to keep himself from grinning. That’s adorable!
At least up until Gallus’s talons hooked into his sea green tail and started tugging back on it, with what felt like all of Gallus’s sizeable body weight. Not only did that send jolts of pain up Sandbar’s spine, it also proceeded to start tugging the pony off of the top bunk.
Sandbar quickly scrambled to try and get some kind of hoofhold to keep himself from being dragged off entirely, but there was nothing except loose bedsheets. “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,” Sandbar murmured with increasing intensity as his forehooves flailed about as his back half proceeded to slide off the side of the bunk, trying to stop this. But when he heard Gallus roll of the bottom bunk in his tugging and the pull strength doubled, his fate was sealed and he was pulled off the bunk entirely, tumbling to the floor below.
Fortunately—for Sandbar at least—Gallus’s body was in an excellent position to completely cushion his fall.
Returning to his dorm after another long school day, Sandbar proceeded to reach out to open the door that divided him from his bed before remembering that Gallus had likely already beaten him there and was lying in wait, watching for him to enter so he could pounce like he had done so many times before.
But this time Sandbar decided to try and be a step ahead of the griffon, and after taking a moment to psych himself up for it, he threw the door open and threw himself into the room, diving flat onto the floor. “I’m back!” he shouted as he did so.
It fooled Gallus, who leapt before he realized what had happened, and proceeded to pounce on nothing, flying out the open doorway and crashing in a heap out in the corridor beyond.
“Ha!” Sandbar crowed, victorious, and proceeded to turn and walk further into the dorm room, smug with himself.
It was short lived, as Gallus merely came about in an elapsed turnaround time of point-eight seconds and pounced again while Sandbar’s back was turned, not expecting it.
Assigned reading could be dull, but Sandbar liked to try and keep at least on top of it or even get ahead if he could, rather than put it off to the last minute like some other students would, because then it would at least be out of the way. So he had been spending most of his afternoon sitting at his desk, calmly going through the reading assignments. Gallus, however, was not being so productive, and had been lounging around the room, feeling bored.
Finally, after some minutes of this, he got up and walked over to join Sandbar at the desk. “I need something to dooooo,” he wailed pitifully, before plopping onto the ground beside Sandbar’s seat. He waited for Sandbar to take notice but when he didn’t, he clawed at the desk edge. “Sandbaaaaaar!”
Sandbar glanced down at him and smirked at how the griffon had rolled onto his back exposing his belly. “What do you want me to do then?” he asked with a chuckle. “Give you belly rubs like you were a dog?” He reached down with one hoof to jokingly do so.
This action was why he later was at the school nurse, getting his right foreleg treated for the series of scratches that had been left on it by griffon talons.
“Now how did this happen?” the nurse asked of him as she treated the thankfully mild injuries.
“I made the mistake of confusing playtime for belly rubs with a griffon,” Sandbar mumbled grumpily.
Sandbar had overslept and was running late. He was rushing to try to get to his first class of the day before it started when, halfway there, he realized he had left behind his textbook for said class. As he raced back for his dorm room to get it, he realized he wasn’t quite sure where he’d last left it exactly. Remembering that Gallus, who didn’t start his classes until later in the morning this semester, would still be in the dorm, he hoped the griffon would be able to help him track it down.
“Gallus!” he exclaimed as he burst back into the room, “Do you know where—?”
He trailed off at that point as his eyes bulged at the sight of what Gallus was in the middle of doing. He had one hind leg extended and pointed up into the air while he had his head and back bent and curved down so to reach his back end and lick…well, Sandbar didn’t even want to think about it. However, Gallus only seemed mildly perturbed, and glanced up from what he was doing to look expectantly at Sandbar, tongue still hanging out of his beak.
Sandbar needed a moment to overcome his flabbergast before saying anything though. “What are you doing?” he finally managed to get out.
“I’m grooming,” Gallus replied, like it didn’t even need answering. “What did you think I was doing?”
Sandbar just stared at him for a long moment.
Gallus kept looking at him expectantly. “Did you need something?”
Sandbar stared at him for a split second longer. “…never mind,” he finally grumbled, and left again, deciding he’d rather just go without the textbook than deal with this awkward scenario any further.
Sandbar had learned something.
Griffons can purr. And further, Gallus can purr in his sleep.
Which in any other circumstance, that would be adorable.
Except Gallus can purr rather loudly.
And that was a very unwelcome thing to be hearing at around three in the morning.
Sandbar doesn’t get much sleep on those nights.
Sandbar once again found himself returning to his dorm after a long day of classes, but he stood there in front of the door for a long moment, not opening it. He knew perfectly well that Gallus would already be inside, waiting to pounce on him the second he opened it. Not eager to face that, he was debating how to best try and avoid this then.
He eventually decided to just stand to one side of the door and push it open from where he’d be out of the line of fire. “I’m back from classes!” he shouted as he did so and quickly ducked away.
But nothing happened.
Sandbar waited for a good moment to be sure, but when no blue griffon came flying through the open door like he had been shot from a cannon, he cautiously peered around the edge of the door. “…hello?” he asked timidly, peering inside the dorm room. To his surprise, there was absolutely no sign of Gallus was anywhere inside. Surprised but frowning, Sandbar timidly started into the room, a little on edge. “Gallus?” he called.
He got no response so he made his way further into the room in search of the missing griffon, unaware that said griffon was hiding behind the open door where he was out of immediate view, crouched low and silently counting down to when Sandbar would be in a good position so to pounce from where the earth pony would least expect it.
Of course, all that pouncing eventually gave Sandbar the idea to try and return the favor back to Gallus, and one day decided to try and do so.
Spying the griffon lounging on the floor napping, belly facing upward so to bask in the warm sunbeam that was shining through the window, Sandbar snuck slyly into the position, then, gearing up like he had seen Gallus do a few times too many, he leapt into the air so to pounce on top of the griffon.
“YAAAAAH!” Sandbar bellowed as he did this.
Gallus awoke with a jolt at this, staring with wide eyes as Sandbar sailed over top of him giving Sandbar a brief flare of victory for catching Gallus off-guard.
Until, as he started to come down onto him, he saw Gallus abruptly flex all of his claws into the attack positions and bare open his rather pointy beak, suddenly becoming a whole lot more dangerous than he had been before. And by that point, though Sandbar remembered failing to try and abort, it was too late to stop himself from landing on top of the now much sharper griffon.
This was why Sandbar was later at the school nurse, getting several scratches and cuts over most of his body treated.
“So what happened this time?” the nurse wearily asked of him as she treated the thankfully mild injuries.
“I forgot five of Gallus’s six ends are pointy when he lies on his back like that,” Sandbar flatly replied.
There were times when you had such a good night’s sleep that you wake up in the morning feeling great and good spirits, like nothing can dampen your morning. Waking up and feeling precisely that one morning, Sandbar proceeded to stretch and pop his back, savoring the good mood. His tummy rumbled though, reminding him that it was also time for breakfast.
“Hey Gallus,” he called through a final yawn as he started to sit up, rubbing at his eyes. “You up yet?”
“Yup,” came the response.
“You wanna go get breakfast then?”
“Nah, I already got mine, see?”
Sandbar turned to look, and saw Gallus sat neatly on the middle of the floor, grinning and looking quite proud of himself.
Clutched tightly in his beak was also a large rat that was clearly very dead.
Stomach lurching at the sight, Sandbar instead flopped back down on his pillow and rolled over to stare at the wall, suddenly not feeling so hungry anymore.
Yet another class day had finally come to an end, and Sandbar was making his way back to his dorm. However, instead of thinking about doing homework or how else he planned to spend his evening, he was thinking about the griffon that was surely already inside the dorm, waiting to pounce on him the moment he arrived.
Fortunately, Sandbar felt confident he had a solution this time.
Upon arriving at the door, he bellowed, “I’m back from classes!” but did not proceed to open the door.
And it was a good thing he did too, because there followed a loud thump as Gallus, on a hair trigger, crashed into the closed door, trying to pounce. Only then did Sandbar open the door, revealing the griffon lying on the floor and clutching at his aching skull.
“You’ll notice I didn’t say I was inside,” Sandbar smugly commented to him.
He then proceeded to stroll confidently past Gallus, only to fall on his face as Gallus angrily and deliberately whipped his tail under his hooves so to trip him.
It was starting to get late and Sandbar starting to feel tired and ready for bed. However, he was reluctant to do so, as he still had homework he still needed to finish, and while it wasn’t due right away tomorrow, he really didn’t want to put it off either. Still, he was somewhat envious of Gallus, who had curled up on their rug in front of the window and had been dozing for the past half-hour. Sandbar wished he could do that.
Instead, what he got was Gallus suddenly bolting upright, abruptly alert and eyes wide, taking in his surroundings with a tense and nervous energy. Sandbar saw the griffon’s ears twitching erratically during this and felt his stomach drop.
“Oh no,” he murmured.
He immediately vaulted himself out of his chair, abandoning his homework, and hurried to clamber up into the safety of his top bunk. He did so just in time, as with a shudder of nervous energy running down his spine, Gallus suddenly shot forward and started bouncing back and forth throughout the room as if he had suddenly been supercharged with energy, excitedly hooting and hollering the whole time as he did.
Sandbar glared at him from where he had taken shelter under his covers. He hated Gallus’s “witching hour.”
“So…not always so glamorous having a griffon for a roommate, huh?” Frosty concluded with a smirk as Sandbar finished listing off all of these examples.
Sandbar was somewhat surprised at himself at how eagerly he had done so…but it did feel good to finally vent about them a little. “I mean, Gallus is still great,” he assured Frosty. “I could’ve ended up with way worse roommates to be sure, and despite everything, I think wouldn’t really want to trade him for anyone else as a roommate.”
“But there’s still times when he can drive you up the wall, right?” Frosty insisted.
Sandbar mulled it over for a long moment. “Honestly?” he finally deduced, “I think that’s just part of having a roommate. I mean, would there ever be a roommate who wouldn’t drive you up the wall over something at least once?”
Frosty laughed. “No, I suppose not,” he admitted. “And now that you say it, I guess I haven’t been appreciating my own roommate enough. Shed feathers are nothing in comparison to some of the things you’ve listed.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that,” Sandbar remarked with a grin. “Everybody should try to get along with their roommates. It might just turn out that whatever your grievances you might have aren’t so bad to live with after all if you just give them a chance.”
They continued eating their lunches in silence for a few minutes.
“I am surprised though,” Frosty continued after a moment. “All of those things you listed are very much on the cat side of a griffon, like you said.” He shrugged. “I just figured there would’ve been a few more involving…you know…the bird side.”
Sandbar thought about it for a second. “Well, if you accidentally pull his tail, Gallus will let out a squawk sort of like a parrot,” he offered.
Frosty snickered. “Sweet.”