> Logs of a Mad Trader > by Huntersquad6 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Wake up and smell the sales dirt muffins! > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello Wasteland! Are you tired of the dull and dangerous hunt for little to no valuable items and scrap when scavenging? Well you are in luck! Coming or already near you is the one the only Maaaaaaaad Moonies Junk Emporium! Great deals for little to nothing items! Cans? We'll buy em! Broken robot parts? We'll buy them! Children? Hell no you sick fuck, only thing your getting is a pipe to your head now just die! Not only do we buy junk and scrap but we even sell them along with some great items you will surly want! Guns? Chems? Ammo? Junk? Death Robots? You god damn right we have em and sure tooting will sell em for the best and only price you will ever dream of! For you see waste landers Here at MMJE We sell everything and anything for the low low price of Five or Ten Caps! You read/heard right you dirty little scum dwellers five or ten caps and you can buy any and everything at the Junk Emporium. So why the Fuck are you still scaving in a shitty death hole when you can be getting the easy life with great sales?! Get a move on you fucking moron! We accept any and all, Ponies, Zebras, Dragons, Sentient Machines, Slavers (No kids), Raiders (Behave yourselves you degenerates), Hell Hounds, Alicorns, Cannibals, Stable Dwellers, Enclave We dont give a shit so long as you bring in the bi- caps.... FUCK! Fucking fuckitty fuckin sales pitch fucking how did you fuck that one up you stupid celestia damned moronic dimwit cockatrice mother- IS THIS THING STILL RECORDIN askdvjbadsjvhbajsdhvhdscjhdsahj AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA DIE RECORDER DIE BY RIPPER AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA Dont mind that folks! Yes we serve all who comes through our doors, broken walls, sewer tunnels or even abandoned ships (Depending where your local Emporium may be located) Now then hurry on down or up and we will see you soon! Stupid fucking speech to textin ass recorder glad I fucking ripped your dumb ass power core out and shoved it in a. . . . . . . . . ARE WE STILL RECORDING MOTHER FU- Note: Theft, Murder and Child abuse is not allowed at the Emporium, any and all transgressions on the trading grounds will be subjected to brutal and profitable death for the enjoyment to our other customers, you have been warned :D > Trading Log: 001 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Traders Log: 001- Grand Opening/ Reports Grand opening of Emporium stores 1, 4,5,7,12, and 32 have been a mild success! Several ponies were timid and nervous to enter the trading grounds due to thinking it was some kind of Raider trap, I blame the now retired advertising recorder whos parts will rust and be scrapped to the children of balefire as some bullshit holy relics. Met a odd ghoul pegasus mute who gave me a nifty book in trade for a working sky wagon and several boxes of pre-war muffin mixes. Shops 2 and 3 were naturally attacked by raiders, but the security systems held firm and the survivors will be sold to the nearest slaver caravan or whoever would like some revenge on the scum, until then they are being held in the bad ponies cells left by the MoMs funification hold out bunkers. All in all, much scrap and junk has been accumulated, many caps were made from the chems and weapons alone, and only a few customers had to be maimed for trying to be cheap thieving mules! Store 12 Sales Report Most unique of our customers were Griffons who were looking for a suitable source of ammo and guns and I must say we did impress! Although they did get in a fit about us also selling to some Steel Rangers but hey we are looking for profit and as long as they dont break the rules they can grumble all they want. Contracts to both parties have been set up and shipments will be heading out in the next month depending on when we get re-supplied. Request we get more armor too, the ones we have may be suitable for some wandering caravan guard but these clients are in a tier that we currently do not have to provide. Signed -MM2245 Store 6 Sales Report Had to bust several skulls in, Fucking chem addicts flooded in here looking for a quick fix and thought some shitty pipe guns would get them the goods. Dumb fuckers are dead and the rest are being held in lock down, let the shitters withdrawal before giving them to the Children of the Apocalypse. Scared off any other customers from the fighting but they will be back when word gets out on the deals, no need for a request of items other than maybe some more potions and bandages for the CoA. Signed -MM3256 To all Centers Due to the success of the openings all locations will be provided more stock to sell Sales Reports are of course only recommended but not required. In the situation of surviving raiders and thieves please treat your guests with mild kindness, just because they are scum doesn't mean we should not act professional! Setting up good relations with the local powers of your regions is a prime success to the MMJE but remember the locals will be the key to your success. Without the good creatures living their lives scrap by scrap we would not thrive so do what you can to give them the best experience! With this said wandering traders who have no stationed location do the best you can by spreading the word of the local Emporiums near you! Other wise scavenge and trade like you were made to do ponies and have fun out there! Comments: Glad to see the openings worked out, Heading out to the coastal dockyards north of Friendship City, hopefully some good scrap and junk can be found there. Will also check in on Store 22 from what was reported little to nothing was mentioned about the stores there, hopefully they are just having a quiet time. End Traders Log