When life gives you inter-reality travel.

by Crafting

First published

what happense when life gives you inter-reality travel? I get to find out.

I was asleep in my bed and not the next. Now I'm in Equestria, ponyville, wanting to get home. Where's Twilight? Without Twilight how am I going to get home!?

If you have any advice or suggestions don't be afraid to say them!

chapter one: lemons.

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OW ... the only word that could ever describe what I was feeling right now. I had only ever felt this much pain when waking up several years ago, and that was just an anomaly. Now it felt as if I was put through a meat pulverizer, without any safety gear. My eyes were blinded even while my eyelids were still closed. And above all that why did I have a migraine! I wanted to go back asleep, snuggle deeper into my… where are my covers? I know I kick a lot in my sleep but not feeling my BED is defiantly new. And… is that birdsong, like actual birdsong… sounded strangely like a flute, several flutes actually. My eyes were harder to open than normal, heavier, and not tired heavy either.

… why am I in a forest? Logically this makes no sense, so this must be illogical. Going off that logic the somewhat purple color of the trees makes sense, although that could just be a mineral in the area. Logically illogical also explains the fact that the underbrush is strangely gnarled, or disfigured, twisting at odd angles with stranger growths. Blue flowers with bluer leaves, I already don’t feel safe and my eyes are still the slightest bit blurry! I blink, hoping to remove the blurriness. Now that I can see I found that the strange red things I thought were somehow my covers, would make sense if someone carried my here in them, were strange round tubes… with fur.

Now that proprioception (the ability to tell where your limbs are without looking) has kicked in I know with a whole lot of doubt that my arms are where those strange tubes are. Either my arms, and thus my hands, have sprouted red fur and turned more cylindrical, or I’m hallucinating, both equally likely given the absurdity of the first option. What is weird is I’m not dreaming, otherwise I would be lucid dreaming, and this feels nothing like the inside of my mind does. If I’m Not hallucinating than the first option is true… so furry tubes where my hands should be… I can work with that, given recent advancements in prosthetic research. Now that the pain is 20% not as bad I can turn my head… only too see that the rest of my body is in a similar situation.

Brain.x86 has stopped working, close it now? >wait<… “what. How? Huh? Yes!!! That doesn't help.” my voice felt different, easier, less gurgling-vibration and more calm guitar. That talk with myself has moved me from panic to annoyance at myself for slipping into my own crazy mask again. Responding to oneself is often seen as crazy yet many people do it, including me. Now my objective wasn’t ‘see where I am’ it’s ‘what happened to my body!’, something easier said than done. Paying attention to my visual receptors again I see another color, several actually, attached where my brain says my hips are. A strange image not unlike a tattoo is there, an almost tree-like grouping of black arrows with a mainly red, although there are many shades and hues of red looking like someone put a red filter over a rainbow, heart seeming to be where the roots should be. A brown tuft of hair fell into the top of my vision. I moved my hand to brush it out of the way and got a good look at the bottom of the cylinder.

It was somewhat of an anomaly that I haven’t, and still continue not to have, screamed. What shouldn’t be possible suddenly seems to be, considering that, from what I can tell, my hand is now a hoof. Or at least that was my first thought, is obviously malleable according to my brain and the fact that I can move it, as all emotions were overloaded and my curiosity took over. It’s definitely malleable, hooves don’t bend like that so it must be something else. My other… appendage is in front of me and it looks as if they are the same. Good, nothing worse than mismatched appendages. I smirked at that mental image, A strange quadruped with mismatched limbs, not unlike discor… discord… a character from the show my… little… pony. MLP, my little pony, my little Pony, colorful… cartoon-y… horse-like… I see the top of a distinctly red muzzle when I look down.

Brain.x86 has stopped, would you like- huh. That makes sense… and doesn’t. “What? Yes. oh. um. Huh… OK… I think.” my brain is still not dead so that’s a good sign. I’m a pony. Only one quick question… HOW? I don’t care about me being a pony, that could be fun, what I do care about is how I’m a pony. Also, where am I? that seems important. Sitting up… that was too easy, I didn’t think about the body change in regards to movement until after I sat up. So, I have muscle memory for something I have never done. My mouth curls into a slight smirk, oh this Will be fun! I stand, no thought about how is necessary, I just do. I look around, I’m in a forest, a dark, damp, creepy forest. “I’m in the everfree.” If I wasn’t so afraid right now I might have cared that my voice sounded like I was, as it is I care more about getting out of here. The sky was still entirely bright blue so the sun won’t go down soon… I hope, the sun is apparently controlled by Celestia... or twilight depends on timing. I never paid much attention to the map that was drawn of Equestria, and now I regret that. If I pick a direction I could be heading deeper into the forest or toward ponyville. The best option is higher ground where I could see where to go next.

Walking is easy even as I was thinking about it. No ‘if you think of it it won’t work’ like so many stories will tell people. This is good because I can step quietly around loud sticks. So far I’m safe, although I’m taking “hope for the best, plan for the worst” to heart, quiet steps when nothing’s around and not a word spoken. I could see a small mountain, or a large hill, just up ahead. Getting there is easy, getting UP is going to be hard. The same principle is there, step in that spot, not the other spot, the problem comes when ‘the other spot’ is off to the left and straight down.

Moving on a slight incline with hooves is much different than one might expect, this is mostly because these hooves can flex and bend. I can actually grip the rocky surface I’m standing on. shaping my hoof like a spade allows me to wedge it in the small cracks and use my leg as a lever. The biggest almost-shock is that ponies are nothing like horses, horses aren’t double-jointed, nor, to my knowledge, can they actually stand like a biped. Ponies are, apparently, supper adaptable, almost as much as humans. And I can’t believe it took me this long to realize that I don’t hurt anymore!

The top of the rocky lump, bigger than I can call a hill but not as big as a mountain, I can certainly see for miles! Which I didn’t need. On the other side, in the direct path I was moving, are approximately fifty to sixty trees, then the open area where ponyville resides. Well, I did learn what I needed, what direction to go, I just wish I checked the other side of the mountain first. I looked toward the sun, shielding my eyes with my left hoof, and see that it’s precisely 11:42. I had my watch. I wish I realized that much sooner, I also wish I had a bit more, my coat or a pencil. Oh well, I need to move down the big hill.

So apparently going down is not an easy as up, as is evident by the fact I’m lying in a heap on the ground. slowly letting the pain go away. I can move, and I do, slowly moving the pain out of my limbs. Getting up off the ground hurt less than getting there, and starting the trek toward ponyville hurts less than that. The trees were less mangled out this far, the ground looked less dead and more like a natural forest. Stepping out of the forest was like dark from light, literally, I had to squint my eyes from the harsh light and tell myself it was too dark to speed up my eyes adjustment, the placebo effect is oh so useful. Once I could see, I saw a town, thatched roofs and straw bricks, and ponies. I had only myself for reference, so another creature that looked so much like the ponies from MLP confirmed where I was.

I moved toward the town almost trance-like, I wanted all the information from every inch I could see. The bricks were smooth, likely molded into the perfect shape, with expert insight of how to do it. The roofs a tight thatch, unlikely that water would get through more than a centimeter. The roads weren’t gravel like I would have expected, but instead a coarse sand with a gray tint that would be expected of gravel. The ponies themselves were almost neon with how pastel they were. Saddlebags and hats were common, clothes weren’t, but that was expected. What wasn’t expected was the sheer size of most of the ponies, many were almost twice my height, some larger. I wasn’t a stallion like I expected, I was a colt, a young pony, not yet an adult.

I stopped moving, the sheer problem of this began to sink in, I would be limited. Ponies seem both more open and more closed-minded than humans. in the show, sometimes young were given power tools, others, they weren’t allowed to have their questions answered. I pushed forward, moving around toward a less busy street. I needed to get to pinkie pie, the only one who doesn’t care about appearances… well after Zecora came over.

Sugar Cube Corner is just as the show depicts it… from afar. Up close, staying away from ponies as to not need to act “normal” in front of them, it looks like an average stone building, not counting the cupcake room on top. I moved quickly when there was a lull in ponies in and out of the shop. The inside was as expected, classic malt shop from the 1950s but as a bakery. I moved over to a booth and looked depressed, slumped over, head on table, and a flat line frown on my face. It took only a minute for the pink anomaly to show up in the opposite booth while I blinked.
“Hi!” she was just a pink and just as bouncy, even when not bouncing, as in the show.
I blinked again, my brain caching up with an object moving while no movement is observed. “Oh, hello” a slight smirk and a glint in my eyes, I sat up straighter, “how is your day?”
Her head tilted 45 degrees a larger smile appeared, “that’s what I wanted to know! You looked real glum over here! And nopony is going to be glum on my watch!”
I felt like laughing, I was talking to pinkie pie! “I knew you wouldn’t pass up the chance to make someone smile. I, however, am not glum. I simply wanted to say hello! Also, do you know where twilight is?”
She quirked a brow, “who’s twilight?”
...what. That statement meant that pinkie didn’t know who she was, why would she… “actually can you direct me to the library? I need to look something up.” that something is if there even Is a library.
“Oh yeah! it’s right down the road!” she didn’t register the subject change… no, she did, she just didn’t comment. “here let me take you!” what? Take me whe- I’m in a library. I don’t know how but I am. I look around, circular design with a detailed pony-head statue in the middle. Golden Oaks library, before Tirek.
“It’s still here?” my voice is quiet, almost scared.
“Well duh! Libraries don’t just spontaneously combust after all!”
That was too similar to what does happen. OK, new test for new info. “Do you know what the elements of harmony are?”
“Hmm” her face is scrunched up like it’s taking an actual effort to remember, “Nope!” that smile is too big for the danger that simple statement poses.
“Oh OK, thanks! I’ll just look for the book I need then!” I had to stay happy so she would leave.
“Okey dokey lokey!” and suddenly she wasn't there, an odd outline of dust was though.

Finally, I could panic. Breaths were ragged, movement was shaky, and the worst of all, my mind wasn’t calm. “okay, okay… it must be something logical… right? Twilight's… just not here yet. She’s... still with Celestia… and… Mare in the moon.” I moved quickly, going over to M and scanning the shelves. Mare on Mars, Mare of steel, Iron Mare; shouldn’t that be in I? Maybe it’s under moon? I looked. Moon bomb, Moondust, Moon fire, Moon imagined, Moon loom, Moon power, Moon tales! I reached for the book by propping myself up on the lower shelf, clamped my hoof around the book, and pulled. The book came out, faster than expected, I lost my grip and the book flew toward the floor. It hit the floor and I found myself wishing I had hands still. Too bad the only hand-like protrusions were hooves, unless… I needed a mirror.

Thankfully it was in the bathroom, up the stairs adjacent to the bedroom. I could finally see my head, still had my blue eyes, and above my eyes, right in the middle of my forehead, was a horn. It looked like someone took a short, red cotton candy cone and glued it on my head. I almost laughed at the sight, until I felt something different. As soon as it registered that, yes I did have a horn, something clicked. Proprioception found the bit it was fiddling with and my brain got all the data my nerves have been sending me. My horn wasn’t just a chunk of ivory stuck in my head, it was a complex machine, with everything needed to perform those incredible “spells.” I moved the energy I could now feel into my horn and pushed it upon the comb sitting next to the sink. It moved, easily too. I’m guessing that this body, however I got it, came pre-installed with all the muscle memory necessary for everything needed. I had… magic? No not magic, magic is the control of a powerful force outside of us, the manipulation of an outside energy like it was water and people created channels for it to flow. This wasn’t magic, no matter how much that name was used, this was an energy! Like electricity, or kinetic force, and like those, one can make it do certain things.

I moved back down to the library proper. Lifting the book in my newfound telekinesis, I opened it to the table of contents. It was so simple, like moving a muscle, you don’t need to think of all the chemical processes happening, you simply move a muscle! Mare in the Moon: Pg 127, 127, 127. 100, 120, 127! Sisters, shunned for her night, trapped in moon, longest day of thousandth year. Stories the same, so why doesn’t pinkie know of twilight? Perhaps I was right before and she isn’t here yet? But that would mean that I’m going to need to wait to get home! Or maybe not, I’m in a library, and there are plenty more around, if Star Swirl could go to EQG then why can’t I get home? shouldn't be too complex, find the “spell” use the spell. If I can’t do the spell than I’ll figure out how! Now where to start?

A Beginners guide to spells should give me the basics. Floating it over to the central table wasn’t hard, neither was opening it to the introduction. What was hard was that it said it was a “foals guide”, a guide for children. Oh well, I can watch MLP, a children's guide on “magic” shouldn’t be too hard. The first lesson is in levitation, nothing new so far it only covered what it could and couldn’t do. One thing interesting is that there is a weight and size limit, but one can expand that thru practice and training, similar to lifting weights.

The second lesson is for actual spells, levitation is the default for magic and that’s what it always goes to with no other constraints, It’s sometimes not even considered a spell. Spell is a word used to describe the bindings and paths you create for magic, I’ll call it magic for now, no other term and I don’t want to confuse the locals too much. If magic is electricity then a spell is the circuit board, with lines and paths that change the way it works. This circuit, the one it shows on the first page of lesson two, is for bending or, given enough power, breaking an object. The first part of the spell is for “locking an object relative to you” which is great! The second part bends the two, or more, parts not held in that “locking” spell thus bending, or breaking, the object. I got that all down, now what to test it on?

chapter two: sugar.

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OW. I don’t think my horn likes what I just did. Short-circuiting a spell hurts! I really need to make sure that my spells are completely filled, and Not putting any power thru before the micro-spell is complete! The quill I was trying to break is not going to be usable anytime soon, except maybe in a charcoal painting. Maybe something simpler would be a good start. A Beginners Guide to Spells is going to be usef-ow! Note to self: don’t use horn immediately after a short-circuit, it hurts!

Using hooves again, I flip back to the table of contents and look for possibly simpler spells. There's the second lesson, where it's labeled "components of spells," then there's lesson three, "Danger's of Spells," they must expect people to read all the way thru before doing anything, like people never get impatient. Lesson four is what I was looking for, "Simple Spells Anypony Can Do." I turn to, then read, Danger's of Spells, I don’t want to have my horn hurt any more than it already does. The lesson talked of spells short-circuiting, although they call it a “misfire,” as well as a note about spells needing to be “strengthened” if more magic is going to be put into them.

Simple Spells Anypony Can Do, is, just as the name implies, some of the most basic spells. Each spell has only two to four components, the equivalent of transistors, resistors, and all of the other -isters in a computer. The only difference is that these are called “glyphs”. each glyph changes a part of the spell, some change what it can work on, others change how it works, and still more change what it actually can do. I would need to learn everything to perform the spell I need, and I will.

The third spell in this section is for pushing something without using levitation, similar to the force push in Star Wars. It's a simple spell, only two glyphs. One glyph is for applying force the other controls direction, opposite to where the glyph is applied. There's an ink-well on top of a writing desk over toward the stairs, my horn doesn't hurt anymore so I levitate it over and set it on the floor. The objective is simple: move the ink-well, without breaking it.

The spell is only two parts held together by a thin thread, you only need circles and other geometric shapes to stabilize the more complex spells. both glyphs of the spell are simple shapes, there is no real precision in this, just don’t put too much magic in and it won’t explode. I check the book again, the spell certainly looks right. Now all I need to do is put just the tiniest bit of magic in! The spell-work is invisible to the naked eye, appearing as only a dull glow of magic. Most spells, according to the book, are created and used before magic ever even reaches the object. The only reason mine is directly on the ink-well is because of the direction glyph, pushing the object on the side it’s applied. Now to use it...

The ink-well moved! It wasn’t much and it tilted a little as it did, but it moved! I Cast a Spell! It may not be advanced and it may have sputtered and glitched as I pushed my magic into it, but that can be fixed! I can learn better spells and improve the “wiring” within them! This was all within only… 22:34, two hours of light study! Why is it dark out? 22:34!

All biological functions once again made themselves known. In other words, I am really hungry! That study session may not have been very intense but it most certainly was distracting. I hope this tree has a kitchen… what a weird thought. There’s a door near the stairs, it leads to what could be the kitchen as observed on my previous mirror-driven search. I hope there’s some food in there that’s non-perishable. If there is some food in there that isn’t non-perishable, I’m clearing it out.

The cupboard held a single box of crackers. It’s not a small box about 6 average-size saltine boxes large, but it still wasn’t what I was hoping for. I bring it with me back to the main room, where it’s... dark? When did the lights go out? How was there light to begin with? Why are there a bunch of ponies looking at the front door? And above all, how did a massive party get set up in under a minute? Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie would be able to do that, and there she is just finishing with hanging the banner. It’s a gorgeous banner, purple with yellow trim, it also says “welcome to ponyville Crafting!” on the front. I wasn’t expecting this, but I know I should have been.

I move silently toward the middle of the grouping of ponies, keeping my head low as to not be seen. Being in the middle, I can hear their conversations. One says “How long will he be?”, another asks “Where’s he from?”, and a final one announces “Quit down! we don’t want to give it away!”. After that I can’t take it any longer, I need to see their faces. I flip the lights on, oh, magic is defiantly useful, and put on my dark story-teller voice, “I’ve been here all along, I’m from a place far far away,” and switching back to normal voice “and it’s a bit late to say that don’t ya think?” Their faces are worth much more effort than I put in, but I’m not complaining.

I hear a series of shocked “huh?”, “What?”, and even a few “great whickering stallions!” I just stand passively, a huge grin and a spark in my eye. Most have turned their heads toward me, others are still failing to find the source of the noise so I help them out, time for an over-the-top cheery voice! “HI! I’m Crafting, If you haven't guessed. I would like to formally say that you all are quite kind, to put all this out for me. Although I must ask why any of you thought that I had left the library in the first place?”

I’m fairly certain that my vision wasn’t entirely blue three seconds ago. I’m also fairly certain that the blue is fur, and that that fur is attached to a pony. Looking up I see some rainbow colors and a face looking down at me. I’m looking up to Rainbow Dash, the fastest pony I know of, and she’s staring back down at me! This calls for the power of curiosity! “Hello! How's your...” checking my watch once again, I confirm it’s 22:40 “night going?”

She stares at me. Then says something! “I thought there was only one new pony in town?” she was looking at Pinkie Pie now so apparently wasn’t actually talking to me, somewhat disappointing.

I look toward Pinkie as well, wondering just what the pink party pony would say. “There is!” was the most anticlimactic thing she could have said, but fit so perfectly in the space that I feel it was somehow rehearsed.

Rainbow looks Back toward me, a quizzical look on her face. or muzzle? “hay. Where are your parents?”

I was afraid of this. I was hoping to put this off until I could have some time to think about just how I could make it so that it didn’t sound like some sob story. Perhaps I could use the whole “unexpected trip” wording? No, that would cause them to try and get me home, which could be rather troublesome in the long run. Maybe I could say that I have way’s to get home, but they’ll take a while to put into practice. That sounds like something plausible, even if they will try to help, they probably won’t try to help as much as a full sob story.

“Well?” oh, I haven’t said anything and the Rainbow-maned pony Is getting more impatient.

I clear my throat and speak directly to another sentient being for the first time since Pinkie. “Why would I know the precise location of my parents at all times? I mean I’m not omnipotent.”

now it’s Rainbow’s turn to look puzzled. “What? Are you saying you don’t know where your parents are?”

“No, I just don’t know where they are in relation to myself.” this is going to take a while.

“So if you do know where they are, just tell us just where in Equestria they are or something.”

“They aren’t” I’m probably going to regret saying that soon enough.

“They aren’t what?” now that is a confused face right there.

“Equestria of course.” Now is the deciding moment, her response and mine decide whether I can do what I need to, or get sent somewhere for “help”.

“Wait your parents aren’t in Equestria? Well, where are they then?”

This could work out, she isn’t immediately saying to get me home, nor is she implying that I need to go to them. I need my next words to be precise, as to not give the wrong impression. “I’m not entirely sure.” I wanted precise, not vague. hope I can fix this. “That isn’t to say that I don’t have ways to get back to them. It’s just that my little excursion into ponyville was unanticipated and thus unplanned.”

Pinkie wasn’t next to me a second ago. “yeah Crafting here isn’t even supposed to exist!” surprising but not untrue, I wonder how she knows? Most seem to ignore her, that’s a silly thing to do.

There’s an orange pony coming this way. Tan mane with a stetson? That is defiantly Apple Jack, no question about it. “Are y'all sayin’ that you ended up in Ponyville by accident? Because that seems rather unlikely.” Her voice has that southern twang that fits her character so perfectly. Perhaps the show was more toaccurate than I thought.

And now my vision was blue once again. What does Dash need to be in my face about now? I would have thought she would at least keep some distance. “Are you a spy?”

“Spy?” French accent is now on, “if you for even a minute could believe that I am a spy I’m not doing a very good job at it.”

“Aha! I knew it! Why are you spying on us?” If she gets any closer our noses would be touching. I also feel Like her eyes are way too magenta.

“I was being sarcastic.” I wish that I could finish with: Well I sole your face! But I can’t. ”I would also say that a spy would want to not be noticed, I, however, love to be noticed by all around me. If one were to use logic, me being a spy is rather improbable.”

“logic, shmogic. Only a spy would know that about spies!”

“And along that logic, you must be a spy to know that! Give yourself up, or face the consequences!” She blinks once, twice, three, I’m going to stop counting that, and makes what sounds like a poorly pronounced ‘what?’. “of partaking in these confectioneries, and enjoying your time here!” With that, I turn toward AppleJack. “I’m guessing that you provided the catering?”

It was apparently her turn to look confused at me “well yeah, but how did you know that? You haven't even had a single bite.” She thinks that it would be hard to figure out.

“LOGIC! In other words, you have an apple cutie-mark and the confections look to be mostly apple-based, I just came to a logical conclusion.”

“Well, he does have quite the way with words, does he not?” The voice would not be out of place at a fine dinner or a castle ballroom, It’s Rarity. I look toward her with the thought of showing just why some people think I’m crazy. lo and behold I can put that thought to use.

“I’m guessing you have a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious feeling, do you not?” The look was worth it all, wide-eyed, jaw an inch low, and the perfect amount of tilt to make her look like she just saw a dragon eating a tree while playing the banjo.

“ah’m sorry? What did y'all say?” looks like AppleJack only caught some of it and the rest just slipped into oblivion, not as good as Rarity’s face thou.

“Easy, he said: ‘I’m guessing you have a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious feeling, do you not’ and then Rarity looked like-” How Pinkie Pie of all people is able to pull that face off better than Rarity, I don’t know, nor care, it’s incredible.

“Ah know that Pinkie! Ah was tryin’ to figure out just what he meant by it.”

Oh, I just know that I will love using my crazy personality to confuzle these ponies to the point of much return. But first I shall tell them the meaning of the puzzling word. “Well to put it simply the word supercalifragilisticexpialidocious means ‘happy’, ‘joyful’, ‘excited’, ‘elated’, or similar words and phrases.”

“Ah, so that is what that means!” Rarity seemed happy just to know what I was talking about, Apple Bloom however walked up like she had just heard that polka was a crime.