> Traveling A New Road > by Longhaul > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Through the Hoops, Through the Portal > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Through the Hoops, Through the Portal “Please have a seat, they’ll be with you shortly.” Nodding my thanks to the pony seated behind the ornate desk, I sat down in one of the plush chairs in the empty waiting room. My nerves were evident as I fiddled with the folder in my hands, the enclosed papers containing additional information along with the CV I had previously provided. It was a stroke of luck that I was even able to get this far in the process; from what I had heard, there were literally hundreds of thousands of applications, and that was just from my country alone. Thinking to myself, as I sat in the waiting room at the top of one of the tallest towers in the city, I resolved that no matter what happened today, I would be happy that I had at least made it this far in the process. *~*~*~*~* My journey to this place began several weeks ago. It began innocently enough with reports of strange beings being sighted in different parts of the world. Tales flew about creatures that resembled miniature horses, some with single horns on top of their heads, others with wings and the ability to fly. Naturally, most of these were attributed to vivid imaginations and consumption of the local hallucinogen of choice, and quickly dismissed as fallacy. It wasn’t until the appearance of a taller equine-like creature, sporting both large singular horn and wings, appeared at the nation’s capital that these sightings were taken more seriously. She introduced herself to the nervous security and law enforcement forces as Princess Luna Nocturnis, co-ruler of a land called Equestria with her sister, Princess Celestia Solaris. After making initial diplomatic contact, both of these “alicorns” (as they identified themselves) were soon addressing the nations of the world at the United Nations building, seeking to establish relations with this strange world their inhabitants had reported visiting in recent times. Some of the more ambitious of the world’s leaders attempted to conquer this strange land with military might. Watching an entire army battalion being essentially wiped from the face of the earth by not an army, but one lone alicorn with a nasty temper, sent the message that these creatures were perhaps not to be trifled with, but rather approached with friendship and kindness. After a few months, when things had calmed down, the princesses sent forth word that they were considering allowing some humans to live among the ponies, and that those interested should submit an application, along with an accounting of all education and employment, and those that passed initial screening would be contacted for a face-to-face interview. I figured I had nothing to lose, it might be a nice change of pace from the life I currently knew, and you never know what will happen unless you give it a shot. I made my submission and waited. I received a box in the mail a couple of days later. The box contained a candle, with holder, and a note. The note said to light the candle, and await further communication. I admit, it was a bit unnerving at first to see a candle burn without melting away, and the greenish flame was unlike anything I had seen since I had worked at the copper manufacturing plant. Still, if nothing else, it would have made a nice conversation piece. Three days later, a scroll popped into existence from the flame and dropped on my desk. I had been selected for an interview, and was given the date, location, and time. So this is really going to happen, I thought. I prepared myself to give the best possible impression I could, and made sure all of the information that they could possibly ask for was correct and in my possession. *~*~*~*~* “They’re ready for you now,” the receptionist pony said, indicating a set of large wooden doors. Thanking her, I stood up, straightening my clothing and checking to ensure that everything was as close to perfect as I could manage. Taking a calming breath, I steeled my resolve and knocked upon the doors. “Come in, please,” a voice called out. I turned the knob and entered, seeing both Princess Celestia and Luna sitting behind an even bigger desk than the one out front. I saw their smiles slip a little bit when I entered, and it took all of my will to keep my own smile upon my face. Well, so much for this, I thought. Perhaps I’m not what they want after all. I bowed reverently when I got closer. “Your highnesses, thank you for seeing me,” I said, maintaining a cheerful demeanor. The princesses both nodded. “Please have a seat,” Princess Celestia said, indicating the chair with her hoof. I sat down, clutching my folder perhaps tighter than I realized. I loosened my grip to prevent damaging the contents. “As we explained in the scroll we sent,” Princess Luna said, “this phase will further determine which candidates will be selected for our pilot program. Following the interviews, we will be conducting thorough background checks on every applicant. Are there any incidents that we should be aware of that will turn up in our search?” I shook my head. “Short of past traffic violations, all of which should have been expunged by now, I have no type of criminal record.” Luna smiled a little. “Excellent.” She and Celestia looked over copies of my CV. Celestia flipped the pages with her magic. “You’ve held quite a few jobs in your time. Did you not have a clear career path in mind for yourself?” Celestia asked, her brow arched, studying me and my reaction. I sighed inwardly, hoping it didn’t reflect on my expression. “I had a few aspirations when I was younger, mostly boyhood dreams and the like. I wasn’t able to fulfill them in the manner I wanted to, but I did at least make some effort to realize them. It did take me a while to see what I truly was happy doing, and as you should be able to see, most of the jobs I held had that element in common throughout my employment history.” Celestia nodded. “I see. And, it isn’t like humans have cutie marks to guide their destiny along, either.” She shifted a few papers. “Do you have your medical history and copy of latest physical?” “Yes,” I replied, handing her a stack of papers. “These are the results of my latest DOT physical, I hope they’re satisfactory. I also have results from visits with my primary care doctor.” “Yes, this will do nicely.” Celestia and Luna studied the papers. After a short while. Celestia set the papers down on the desk. “Now, do you have any questions for us?” Luna asked, studying my reactions carefully. I thought for a moment. “I was curious as to what the overall goals of this program were, and if there was any special criteria you were seeking.” Luna nodded. “A fair question indeed. Simply put, there have been lots of questions about your world from our subjects, and we thought that by introducing your species into our world gradually, with a few select families, our little ponies could see and talk to you, perhaps soothing fears and learning about you in the process.” “And while my sister did indicate that we are seeking families to raise human children in our world,” Celestia added, “we are also seeking single individuals so our ponies can get a fuller picture of how humans live and interact.” Slightly relieved at hearing that, I nodded. At least I wasn’t completely out of the running yet. “And you will provide assistance in getting established in Equestria, I take it?” “Correct,” Celestia said. “A house will be provided for the selected candidates, who will be placed strategically in a town of our choosing. A small stipend will be provided for the first month, after which we expect the candidates to have gained employment and be self-sufficient. Of course, we will assist in a small way if unforeseen circumstances arise.” “We have gained knowledge regarding how humans in general live,” Luna added, “and to that end we are making arrangements to provide for those chosen, so their arrival will not be complete culture shock.” “Will a list be provided of what can and cannot be transported into Equestria?” “The chosen candidates will be given a list, yes. Bear in mind that any contraband that is attempted to be smuggled in will result in instant disqualification, at the very least.” Luna looked stern at that last part, no doubt still remembering the attempted invasion. I had no doubt about what might happen in that case. I thought for a moment. “I believe that covers everything I was curious about.” Both princesses smiled. “Excellent.” Celestia began gathering up the paperwork. “We have many other interviews to conduct, but we expect the process to be complete within the next three months. Keep your dragon-fire candle burning, and we will send word when we have made our decisions. You will be notified even if you are not selected.” The princesses rose, and I did likewise. I shook each princess’s hoof in turn, with a slight bow to each. “Thank you again for your time, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.” “Thank you for coming down today, we will be in touch,” Luna said cordially. I turned and walked out of the room, shutting the door behind me. I saw two other candidates waiting as I said a quick thank-you to the receptionist and headed for the elevator for my ride to the ground floor. My mind wandered while waiting for the elevator to arrive, and thought about what it would be like to start over again in a completely different world. This was much different from a cross-country move, which I had done twice before, once east-to-west, and once north-to-south. I would be a complete outsider, a foreigner in a foreign land, learning new customs and way of life. I began to wonder if I was indeed over my head, and up to the task. The ding of the elevator interrupted my thoughts, and I stepped inside for my journey back to the lower levels. No sense fretting about it now; it wasn’t even guaranteed I’d be selected for the program. The doors slid shut, and the elevator took me back down to the ground floor. *~*~*~*~* Six months came and went, and still I waited to hear word about the aftermath of the interview. I had figured they would have been swamped with applicants, each seeking their own place in history – after all, how great would it be to lay claim to being chosen to live in an entirely different world? That’s a science- fiction fan’s dream come true. Because of this, I figured the selection process would take a longer time than what could be counted as ‘normal’ by Earth standards. My daily routine continued, and I even started to bank some extra money and pay off my debts. It wasn’t because I had it in my head that I would be chosen, rather it was a sound idea and something I should have been doing long before this even took place. At least now, I had added incentive to clean the slate. Day after day, the dragon-fire candle on my desk continued to burn, but never lost any mass due to melting. The sun hadn’t even risen fully on that Sunday morning when I heard a loud thump coming from the area near my desk. Grumbling, I stumbled out of bed and threw a pair of shorts on, and walked out to see what had fallen over this time. I was stunned to see a pile of books and papers, standing about nine inches tall, next to the candle. A scroll sealed with wax lay on top of the stack, bearing the seals of both of the princesses – a sun motif for Celestia, and a moon for Luna. Carefully, I broke the seals and unrolled the scroll. It read: A good day to you, After a lengthy and careful process, we are pleased to announce that you have been selected for our residency program in Equestria. We had received many applications, and conducted scores of interviews, and you scored within the upper percentile in each facet of our criteria. In this packet are the papers necessary to begin the citizenship process, along with books and pamphlets for you to read in an effort to prepare you for the customs and lifestyles you will be experiencing upon your arrival. We have also enclosed a list of items that are forbidden to cross into our world, along with recommendations for items you should bring for your own personal comfort. You have been selected to reside in the town of Ponyville. Proper housing is being secured and will be ready upon your arrival. We have arranged your arrival date for six months from the date of this letter. As our calendars are similar in design and length, we trust this should not pose too great an inconvenience in getting your affairs in order prior to departure. We will also arrange for transportation of your goods into our world. Once again, we bid you congratulations, and eagerly look forward to welcoming you as one of our newest citizens to Equestria. Most sincerely yours, Celestia Luna I re-read the scroll to make sure there was no misunderstanding, and that I hadn’t missed a word. Nope, sure enough, it was really happening. Being too excited to go back to sleep, I instead made a lovely celebratory breakfast and coffee, and while I ate, I read through some of the literature that had been provided. *~*~*~*~* Six months may seem like a long time, but as I knew from past experience, time had a way of sneaking up on you, leaving you scrambling at the last moment. I was determined to not let that happen. I carefully made a list of things that needed to be done, and their approximate completion dates. I also had to begin the arduous process of sorting through the things that I had collected during my life, and deciding which would come with me and which would be forever discarded. Of all the tasks I faced during that six months, this was perhaps the hardest one of all to complete. And, as I had expected it would, the actual day of the move came all too soon. “Here’s the last one,” I said, placing a cardboard box on the tail end of the wagon. Yes, wagon. A rather large wagon pulled by a tall pony. He’s what they call an ‘earth pony,’ having no wings or horn. He was gray-furred, or at least I guess it was called fur, and had a brown mane and tail. He wore a battered Stetson-style hat on his head, and busied himself positioning the things I brought out of the apartment, securing them tightly inside the wagon. He had a unique design on his flanks, what I learned from my reading was called a ‘cutie mark,’ and his was of a wagon wheel with a set of wings. He told me the other ponies all called him Longhaul, and back in his younger days he carried goods across the whole of Equestria. Having been a cross-country driver myself, we hit it off pretty well, swapping stories about our lives on the road, and the strange things we’d seen, although nothing I could tell compared with some of the encounters that Longhaul had during his career. I mean, sure, I’d hauled produce and been bonked on the head by crates of broccoli and heads of lettuce when the loads shifted, but at least a gang of ravenous rabbits never attempted to hijack my load. “You sure that’s all there is?” Longhaul asked, looking over the load as he slid the last box into place. “I was expecting lots more than this, given the stories from the other moving ponies.” I shook my head. “Nah, I’m only taking the essentials. I figure I’ll be acquiring more stuff once I get settled in.” Longhaul nodded. “Gotcha.” He secured the load with straps. “So, what’s left to do?” “Just got to lock up, turn the keys in to the rental office, and then we’re ready to cross.” I stopped and looked around. It was just after noontime, the day was clear and bright but not too warm, and as I looked around, it was finally sinking in that this could be the last time I ever set foot on the world I had known as home. The enormity of it hit me and I felt tears forming I my eyes. I blinked them away quickly and drew a shuddering breath. I felt a hoof nudge my arm. “Hey, you okay?” Longhaul asked, his voice filled with concern. I nodded slowly. “Yeah, I’m okay.” I passed a bottle of cold water over to Longhaul and sat down on the steps leading to the apartment. “Let’s just take a quick rest before we head out.” Longhaul took a drink from the bottle, holding it quite well for a creature with only hooves. That was going to take some getting used to on my part. “So, what made you want to leave all of this and come to Equestria?” he asked, adjusting his hat to keep the sun out of his eyes. It took me a minute to ponder my answer. “Humans are strange creatures. We’re always on the lookout for new experiences, wanting to try new things, just to see if we can do them. Some do this for financial gain, some for the excitement and thrill they get out of it … me, I just thought it would be a nice change, and I really don’t have much here anyway. Why not see what I could do somewhere else?” “If that’s the case, then why go somewhere completely unknown? Staying here and moving to a different town or city would be a change,” Longhaul countered. “’Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.’ Yeah, it would be a change, but would still be familiar. And, I suspect after a short while, it would feel exactly the same as it does now. I wanted to go somewhere completely new and learn it from the ground up — the customs, the inhabitants, the ways to make a living. I guess it’s more of my last hurrah — do it now before I get too old to do anything.” Finishing my water, I stood up and walked back into the apartment, taking a careful look around. After making sure I hadn’t left behind anything I wanted to take, I secured the apartment and walked back outside to Longhaul. “This won’t take long, I’ll be back in a minute.” Having turned in my key, I went back to where Longhaul was waiting with the wagon. He had hitched himself up and was ready to get moving. About a month before the move, I bought myself a bicycle and began riding regularly, in an attempt to get used to it as it would be my preferred method of transportation in Equestria. I mounted up and pulled alongside Longhaul. “Okay, let’s head out, we’re losing daylight.” With a mighty tug, Longhaul got the wheels on the wagon rolling and we made our way to the portal. It was explained in the literature that I received that the portals were an experiment gone awry, which was the reason for the random appearances at various points across the globe. The princesses managed to refine the spell that created them, allowing for more pinpoint placement, which meant that when the day arrived for the move, there was a portal waiting along a quiet side road not far from my apartment. All the better from a security standpoint. Two stone-faced guards stood by the portal entrance. Longhaul and I slowed our approach, and came to a stop when instructed. One guard went over to the wagon while the second approached me. “May I see your access papers, sir?” the guard asked in an official tone. I quickly passed the paperwork over to the guard, who took them in his magic and nodded after giving them a cursory glance. “Okay, please wait here while we finish our inspection. Won’t take too long.” The guard returned to the wagon to aid his partner. Word had spread about one couple that had attempted to smuggle some contraband across the portal. Their stupidity was rewarded with a complete revocation of their citizenship offer and a stint in the Equestrian prison system, before being returned to Earth. I shook my head when I learned about this, wondering just how stupid my fellow humans could be, and cautioning myself to not think too hard about that lest I get an answer that I might not like. After a few minutes, the guard returned to me and passed my papers back. “Everything checks out. Welcome to Equestria.” He smiled and gave a signal to his partner, who lit her own horn and directed it at the portal entrance. The portal, which had been a hazy, opaque oval shape framed by a ring of gold, suddenly became clearer. On the other side stood small, modest houses, dirt roads, and just at the entrance, a welcoming committee of ponies. A pony mare with gray hair and glasses stood in front of the group, bearing a nervous smile. Longhaul let out a low whistle. “Wow, looks like the entire town came out to greet you. Just remember not to say anything stupid,” he quipped. I chuckled and gave him a slight nudge. “Guess we’d better not keep anybo—err, pony waiting.” Dismounting my bicycle, I pushed it along while I walked alongside Longhaul, crossing through the portal slowly. The guards followed, and once we had made it to the other side, the portal vanished without a trace. > Settling In > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2. Settling In I was quite surprised by the reception awaiting me as I crossed through the portal. It seemed the entire town had turned out to see this strange creature that would be living among them, and I do admit that the prolonged stares were a bit unnerving, to say the least. Most of this was eased by Mayor Mare, as I learned she was called, making a welcome speech and assuring the townsfolk that the princesses had determined I was indeed quite harmless and open to questions about myself and my species. She explained to me that there was another princess, one who lived in this town, who was unavailable today because she was assisting with a “friendship emergency,” but would introduce herself as soon as she was able. After the welcoming words, she presented me with the key and the deed to my new house, to which the town erupted in applause – as best as ponies could applaud without hands. It sounded more like a subdued earthquake, with the rumbling of many hooves beating on the ground. I smiled, waved, and was immediately assaulted by a pink blur that came out of nowhere. “Yay! I get to throw a ‘welcome the alien to Equestria’ party and I’m so happy to meet you and I hope we’ll be good friends! I’m Pinkie Pie, it’s super wonderful to meet you!” I looked back into the wide blue eyes and smiled. “It’s nice to meet you too, Pinkie … now, what’s all this about a party?” “It’s your party, and we’ll have food and drinks and dancing and you’ll get to meet everypony because I invited the entire town to come meet you and it’s gonna be so much FUN and I can hardly wait for you to get there so we can start the party!!!!” Pinkie exclaimed. “That sounds great, I’m looking forward to it,” I replied, still smiling. “I do think I should get to my house and get my stuff put in there, as I’m sure that Mister Longhaul would like to go home and rest. After all, it’s been a long day for him, I’m sure.” Pinkie nodded. “Okie dokie, lokie! When you’re done, come on over to Sugar Cube Corner. We’ll be waiting!” And with that, Pinkie was … I guess it’s called ‘pronking’ … down the road. A mint-green unicorn and a cream-colored earth pony approached. “Um, if you’d like some help moving your things, we’d be happy to lend a hoof … or a horn, as the case may be,” the unicorn said. “That would make things go a bit quicker, thank you. That’s very kind of you.” I told them my name. “I’m Lyra, and this is Bon Bon. She runs a candy store here in town, maybe you’ll stop by and visit?” I nodded. “I do have something of a sweet tooth, yes. Okay then, let’s be on our way.” Longhaul gave the wagon a pull, and the four of us set off toward my new home. *~*~*~*~* Not being sure what to expect in regards to the house I was given, when we arrived I was quite surprised. The house was a modest single-story building, with one bedroom and full bathroom, a roomy kitchen, and open living area. With Lyra and Bon Bon’s help, the unpacking of Longhaul’s wagon took less time than I had anticipated. Electrical power, from my readings before the trip across the portal, was commonplace in Equestria, but not produced in a form that humans would recognize. I learned that special crystals were harvested that provided basic electrical needs for homes and businesses, and smaller pieces could even be used for portable items. Special containment vessels could then enclose the crystal, and conventional wiring would be used to distribute the energy where needed. This eliminated the need for large generating stations, as the crystals could recharge themselves during non-use times, such as during the day, when solar panels could be utilized. Seeing power outlets installed in the walls made me feel better, knowing that I could have a place to set up some of the electronics that I had brought with me. But that would have to wait. There was a party going on and I needed to be there. Lyra and Bon Bon walked with me to Sugar Cube Corner. It boggled my mind as to how many ponies could fit into such a small space, and yet it really didn’t feel all that cramped or closed in. Food and drinks were set up for the taking, and a local pony DJ provided the music. Ponies came over to me and said brief words of welcome, the bolder among them engaging in more prolonged conversation. It was nice to feel welcomed, and as the day passed into night, and the party began to break up, I felt pretty good despite the long day I had. I made my way home and settled in for my first night’s sleep in my new home. *~*~*~*~* The first week passed in something of a blur. I spent most of it just wandering through the town, getting the feel for how it was laid out and where everything was. Thanks to the conversion of my money to Equestrian currency, the savings I had accumulated prior to my move meant that I wouldn’t have to rush to find employment right away, affording me the luxury of being able to explore. Sometimes, the best way to observe a new land is to just wander around, taking note of the inhabitants, and seeing how they interact with each other. Which is how I spent the next few weeks, moving through the town and through the markets, always ready with a wave and a friendly hello to anypony I happened to pass. What worked even better, especially with a population still a bit skittish about the strange being in their midst, was plunking myself down on a bench near the town square and letting the ponies approach me. When they realized that I wasn’t going to leap on them and do unspeakable things to them, they opened up and even persuaded their friends to come over and say hello to the friendly alien in the town. By doing this, I was able to make a decent amount of friends and learn even more about the town and pony culture in general, as they learned about human culture and how we lived. Having a few connections in town aided me greatly in my search for work. Living frugally, I was able to not go through my savings too quickly, but it was important that I secure a source of bits to replenish what I did spend, and that necessitated gainful employment. After taking a few different aptitude tests and going through my employment and educational history, I managed to find day labor, doing odd jobs for some of the ponies in town, and quickly gained a reputation as a hard and diligent worker. I think the chef at the restaurant was surprised the day I showed up as a temporary prep cook, not expecting much out of me and probably figuring he’d have to spend the whole day foal-sitting me. About an hour in, he was quite impressed with my knife skills, moreso that I hadn’t lopped off any major appendages and that I actually knew what a brunoise was, unlike the temp they sent over the day prior, and once the prep was done, he took time to sit and talk with me. It was an honor for me when, at the start of dinner service, he had me stand and watch as he and his sous chefs plated the dishes and sent them out to the dining room. I was there longer than I was contracted for, but was happy to stick around as an unpaid commis for the rest of the day and helped them break down stations and clean up at the end of the day. Days and weeks went on, and for the most part, the ponies were friendly, if somewhat wary of my presence. Understandable, really. Some gangly-looking freak wanders in from another world and one wouldn’t really know what to expect. However, as this was a learning experience for me as well as for them, simply talking with them helped soothe any lingering fears among many of the ponies, and made all of our lives much easier. *~*~*~*~* After a day of exploration and a lovely dinner, I sat in my living room reading a book. As much as the princesses did to ease our transition to this new land, there was still no internet or television, and I did not feel like venturing out to see a play or go to a club. Instead, I either watched the movies that I had brought with me or listened to music. Tonight, I opted to crack open a book I hadn’t read in ages, and with no distractions, I felt that perhaps I could possibly notice things that I had overlooked in my previous readings. I was deeply engrossed in the story when there came a knock on my door. I got up from my chair and went to the door. Opening it, Princess Luna smiled at me. “Greetings, I was doing some observations of the new humans and I noticed you were still awake. May I come in?” she asked. “Of course, please, make yourself comfortable,” I answered, stepping aside as Luna entered and looked around. “May I offer you a drink or a snack?” “No, thank you, I won’t be long,” she replied. Her gaze fell upon the book I was reading. “Tell me, what is this ‘Shakespeare’ you are reading?” “Oh … he was a famous playwright who lived many centuries ago. His works are still taught today in our schools as examples of the evolution of our language.” “Fascinating.” Luna studied the cover again. “Would you read us a small passage from this book?” “Certainly.” Picking up the book, and moving to where I had left off, I began to read: “Ah, so much interest have I in thy sorrow As I had title in thy noble husband! I have bewept a worthy husband's death, And lived by looking on his images: But now two mirrors of his princely semblance Are crack'd in pieces by malignant death, And I for comfort have but one false glass, Which grieves me when I see my shame in him. Thou art a widow; yet thou art a mother, And hast the comfort of thy children left thee: But death hath snatch'd my husband from mine arms, And pluck'd two crutches from my feeble limbs, Edward and Clarence. O, what cause have I, Thine being but a moiety of my moan, To overgo thy plaints and drown thy cries!” Glancing up, I noticed Luna staring at me with a look of shock on her face. “Is…is something wrong?” I asked. “How … how dost one know the Old Ponish? ‘Tis the tongue not used now save by mineself, and many years hath passed since I heard it spoken thus!” Luna was displaying a mix of joy and bewilderment. “This was how they spoke in Shakespeare’s time,” I explained, “and his works were not translated into the more modern language, but preserved as a historical record of the days past. I’ve had a fascination with this ever since I started learning about it, and once I learned how to properly read his works, they became more enjoyable to me.” My vision was quickly obscured by a mass of blue fur as Luna swept me into a hug. “O, most glorious night! To hear thee speakest the Old Ponish, truly I do feel mine old self again!” “Umm … you’re welcome?” I mumbled through the blue carpet covering my face. “’Twas our sister’s idea to forego the old ways,” Luna said, releasing the hug and allowing me to breathe normally. “Verily, she did command us to speak in the Modern Ponish. She sayeth ‘twould make understanding us easier for the humans, yet thou art capable of comprehending our speech, art thou not?” “Yes, I do understand you, and quite well, but I do agree with your sister. Not everyone is as well-versed in this way of speaking as I am, it’s mostly those that study these works at length. I think it’s a beautiful way of speaking, honestly.” Luna brightened, and looked at me with hopeful eyes. “Wouldst thou object to visits from us, in which ‘twould allow us to speak in the tongue we are accustomed to? Thou art free to refuse, of course, ‘tis not a command or royal edict.” Nodding slightly, I smiled at Luna. “I would be honored to have you visit. I’m usually up late unless I have to work early in the morning, and you are always free to stop by.” Once again, my vision turned a deep shade of blue as I was once again vigorously hugged. “We accept thy most gracious invitation, good sir! We shall endeavour to not be a pest; rather, we would engage thee in stimulating conversation and help thee learn about us as much as we will learn about thee.” She released the hug. still wearing a broad grin on her muzzle. “We must away, our night is full of tasks that we must complete ere the morn. We shalt see thee anon, friend!” With that, she teleported away, leaving me standing in my living room, slightly disheveled from the forceful hugs, and marveling at how I just made a very good friend indeed. *~*~*~*~* “Land sakes, young’un, you’ve been at it fer hours now! Git down here and take a rest afore yew bake what few brains yew have left!” shouted the elderly green-colored mare. “Now, I ‘preciate a good work ethic ‘n all, but boy, yer gonna run yerself into the ground workin’ lahk yew do ‘round here!” “Yes, Miss Smith,” I called down, “let me finish this section and I’ll be right down. I’m almost done here anyway.” The Apple family have been a steady source of employment for me in the weeks since I arrived in Ponyville. There’s always something to do around the farm, whether it’s planting, harvesting, or just general maintenance on the buildings and tools. I did most of the maintenance work, freeing Applejack and Big Macintosh to handle the day-to-day farming chores. And, if there was something that was a bit beyond my abilities, either one of them would gladly pitch in and help me, teaching me another skill I could use. From what they taught me, I was able to forgo my day-laborer position and start a business as a freelance handyman. Supplementing the tools I had with newer tools the Apples helped me obtain from their trusted supplier, I was soon equipped to handle most requests of me I put the finishing coat of paint on the wall of the barn I was working on, and made my way down the ladder to the ground. It was a warm day, using the standards of the place I used to live. The ponies, however, were constantly remarking on how hot it was, and was going to be for the next few days until the weather pegasi brought in some much-needed showers and cooler weather. I was hired by the Apples to paint the farm buildings, with the goal of getting them done before the rains arrived. I admit, they were shocked when it appeared I would be finishing a day ahead of schedule. Granny Smith, Applejack, and Mac were sitting on the porch already as I walked up the steps. A pitcher of iced sweet tea sat on a table, along with a selection of baked goods. I nodded my hellos as I approached and sat down, and poured myself a tall glass of tea. “Ah jus’ don’t know how you do it,” Applejack said, sliding a plate piled high with apple fritters over toward me. “You work sunup to sundown, in the heat, and it don’t seem to bother you at all. Ah gotta say, that’s the quickest paint job Ah’ve ever seen.” I grinned. “It’s no big secret, really. I got used to working long hours at a lot of my jobs before this, this heat’s rather mild compared to some of the summers in the place I used to live, and I never really got used to taking breaks at work. I’d stop if I needed to for a few minutes and get right back at it.” I took a long pull from my glass of tea. “I also had a decent system in place. Start early in the morning, let that coat of paint dry out in the heat of the midday sun, and put the second coat on to dry overnight. Seemed to work well and bought an extra day for touch-ups if we need them.” “Well, Ah’m just glad the paint’ll be dry before that rainstorm gets here. One time we did this, me ‘n Mac, we had just finished when Rainbow Dash and the weather team brought in a gullywasher of a storm! All that paintin’ and hard work, gone in a flash!” Applejack shook her head and looked skyward. “Speak of the devil. We got incomin’. Guess she smelled the fritters.” I followed Applejack’s gaze to a small blue dot, rapidly growing bigger, a prismatic tail flowing behind. I took a couple of apple fritters, and placed them on a plate in front of me before Rainbow Dash hovered near us. “Hey, AJ, Mac, Granny,” she said to each in turn before turning to me. “Dude, glad I found ya. Fluttershy was wondering if you could come by her place and fix one of her outside doors. Guess one of her animals pitched a fit and broke something.” I nodded. “Shouldn’t be a problem. Let me see what’s going on.” I pulled my calendar book from my pocket and flipped a few pages. “AJ, you gonna need me tomorrow for anything?” Applejack thought for a moment before shaking her head slightly. “Nope, assumin’ the touch-ups ain’t much and can be done today, Ah reckon we’ll be good until the storm passes. Ah’ll check with ya after that.” I nodded and made a note in the book. “All right then, I can head up there first thing tomorrow morning. Can you let her know for me?” Rainbow Dash folded her forehooves in front of her. “I probably could… if you pay the fee first.” She grinned a sly grin. Rolling my eyes, I retrieved one of the apple fritters I had set aside. I broke it in half and offered it to her. Rainbow shook her head. “Full fee or forget it.” I sighed, and held out the unbroken fritter. She grinned, and happily ate. When she finished, she gave a flap of her wings and moved slightly away from the porch. “Okay, I’ll let her know for ya. What time?” I thought for a minute. “Tell her around seven-thirty. That’ll give me time to look at it and if I need parts, I can get them early enough and not have to tie up her whole day.” Rainbow nodded. “No problem, dude. Okay, I gotta get back to work, we’re getting things ready for that storm. Seeya!” And with a mighty burst of energy, she streaked away into the sky. Applejack sat, thinking. “She coulda taken a fritter from the big plate of ‘em we had. Why did she have to take one of yours?” she asked. I shrugged. “She says they taste better that way,” I replied, nibbling on one of the fritter halves. *~*~*~*~* The sun was barely over the horizon when I approached Fluttershy’s cottage on the hill. Various types of small animals scurried about in the early- morning light, most ignoring me, others moving out of the way of my bicycle. Thanks again to the Apples, I had a towable wagon on the back to carry my tools and other supplies. It also made carrying my groceries home a much easier task. I remembered Fluttershy from Pinkie’s welcome party for me. I saw the yellow pegasus sitting in the corner, as if she was afraid to approach me or anyone that was there. I went over and introduced myself, and she told me in a very soft voice, barely as loud as a whisper, that her name was Fluttershy. I could see she was uncomfortable, so I told her it was nice to have met her, and maybe we’d see each other around town. A couple of days later, I received a lovely note from her, thanking me for not forcing her to socialize and respecting her space. I parked my bike and went to the front door. I knocked gently. “Miss Fluttershy? I’m here to look at that broken door,” I said in a gentle voice. The door creaked open a little bit, and a big turquoise eye looked me over carefully. “Oh, my… you’re a little early. Please, come in,” Fluttershy said, opening the door wider. I quickly stepped inside. Being mindful not to tread on any of the smaller inhabitants of her home, I followed Fluttershy inside. She led me to a door that had been hastily braced in its frame. I could see small bits of wood on the floor, near the frame. Unbracing the door, I looked at the doorframe where the hinges connected. The screws had been pulled free from the wood, stripping the holes and making them unusable. The hinges on the door were still connected. “Um … yesterday, Harry was due for his annual physical, and when it came time to give him his booster shot, well… he got a bit scared and tried to run, but slammed into the door.” Fluttershy looked down at the floor. “I’m awfully sorry about having to bother you like this,” she said softly. I smiled reassuringly. “It’s not a bother, it’s what I do for a living.” I glanced around to see a brown bear with bandages around his muzzle, looking embarrassed. I turned my attention back to the door. The hinges had their screws laid out in a zig-zag pattern, instead of a straight row. I took a screwdriver from my tool pouch and removed one of the hinges from the door. Flipping the hinge opposite from how it had been installed, I saw that the screw holes lined up perfectly over fresh, untapped wood. “The good news is,” I said to Fluttershy, “this is a fairly easy fix. If there’s things you need to do, go on ahead and I’ll find you when I’m done.” She sighed with relief. “Oh, that’s wonderful news! I’m sure Harry feels better hearing that, don’t you, Harry?” The bear nodded enthusiastically. “Okay then,” I said, “let me grab some more tools that I’ll need and get to work.” About a half-hour later, with some generous assistance from Harry, who was more than happy to help atone for his misdeed, I packed my tools away in the wagon. Fluttershy stood with me in the cool morning air. “Thank you again for coming out this way … um … I don’t know how much this is going to cost me, but, um...” I shook my head. “This one’s on me today. It was a simple fix, and I didn’t need to buy anything new. It’s what I usually do with things like this that don’t take too much time or materials.” Which was true, given the number of colts and fillies coming up and asking me to fix a toy or a scooter of theirs, although I suspected it was also to watch me use my hands as I worked. “Well, um, can I at least offer you a cup of tea before you go? Maybe we could sit and talk for a bit, since we didn’t get to at the party when you arrived...” “I think that would be lovely,” I said, checking my watch. “I have an appointment this afternoon but my morning is quite open. After you, please,” I said, letting Fluttershy lead the way back to her cottage. “If I may ask, who is your appointment with?” “I’m supposed to be meeting Princess Twilight at her palace. I admit, I’m a bit nervous about it.” “Oh, there’s nothing to be nervous about,” Fluttershy assured me. “Twilight is one of the nicest ponies I’ve met. I think you two will get along great.” “I know, I shouldn’t worry,” I sighed, “but it still feels like getting called into the boss’s office. You can’t help but wonder what you might have done wrong.” I straightened myself up and smiled to Fluttershy. “Let’s have that tea and chat. I’d love to learn more about what you do.” She smiled, and we walked back inside. > Smooth Coffee, Bitter Memories > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 3. Smooth Coffee, Bitter Memories It was with a bit of trepidation that I knocked on the door to the crystal tree palace. Upon finishing my visit with Fluttershy, who proved to be an excellent conversationalist, I immediately went home and changed out of my usual work clothes. Sure, they were clean, but this was royalty I was meeting with. Add the fact that this was my first time meeting with Princess Twilight Sparkle, and my colossal case of nerves, and you can see why I felt it was important to make the best impression I possibly could. I opted for a ‘business casual’ look, consisting of a nice dress shirt, dress slacks, and a tie. The ponies in town told me that the princess doesn’t always stand on formality, so I figured I could get away with not going totally formal in dress. Rarity was nice enough to make me a set of dress shirts after I did those emergency repairs at her shop in lieu of actual bits, but the cost of these shirts alone probably exceeded what I set as the charge for unclogging the drain line after her sister decided to dispose of a failed science experiment. Rarity, to her credit, waved me off when I suggested that I should pay for such fine craftsponyship, stating that it was indeed her honor to create clothing for an entirely new and different species. In Sweetie Belle’s defense, I guess she didn’t know that her formula for quintuple-expanding foam resulted in a delayed reaction. I was even more amazed to learn that it wasn’t a science experiment at all — she was trying to make whipped cream for the dessert that evening. The door opened and I smiled, seeing a familiar and friendly face. “Hey, Spike,” I said, “I have an appointment with Princess Twilight. Is she in?” “Oh, so you’re the one that’s had her in a tizzy all morning. She’s here, dude, let me take you to the meeting room.” Spike stepped aside until I entered, and closed the door behind me. “Down this way,” he said, taking the lead and escorting me along the highly-polished corridor. I was grateful I was wearing soft-soled shoes or the racket would have been deafening. I had met Spike on my excursions through town, and usually saw him hanging around Rarity’s place quite frequently. Every now and then we’d sit and talk at Sugar Cube Corner, where I’d get him a gemstone-sprinkled cupcake and we’d discuss the goings-on around town and latest gossip from Canterlot. It made me feel better knowing that he was the princess’s personal assistant – “Number One Assistant,” he’d inform me – and I figured if she had asked, he’d put in a good word for me. “It’s been weird, dude,” Spike said as we walked. “I mean, she knew you were in town and she wanted to meet you, and everything seemed fine. Then, she gets this scroll from Princess Celestia and she’s been Twilighting all morning.” “ … I’m sorry, what-lighting?” I asked, confused by this strange term. “Twilighting. It’s what we call it when Twilight has one of her panic attacks over something trivial. I mean, I know what was in the scroll and it doesn’t seem like a big deal to me, but Twi seems to think it’s a potential disaster just waiting to happen.” We entered an enormous room, with eight chairs arranged around a circular table. The top of seven of the chairs was engraved with a cutie mark. I recognized six of them. It then dawned on me just how important many of these ponies, that I had come to call my friends, truly were, and how they could have had me kicked out of town on a whim if they so desired. This thought made me worry a bit. Hearing that the princess has sent down a scroll, which could mean that there was trouble brewing regarding my status in this world, and … I started to hyperventilate a little bit, and tried to calm myself down, which involved taking a deep breath and holding it. In my defense, I usually don’t hold it until my lips and face start to turn blue, but darn it, this was an extraordinary circumstance and maybe if I passed out they’d possibly take pity on me. After all, hadn’t I suffered enough? I was unconscious, for goodness sake. Spike saw this, and said softly, “Oh great, now he’s starting to do it too.” He gave my forearm a gentle pat. “Relax, dude, I know for a fact you’re not in trouble. Twilight just wants to get to meet you, and I think Princess Celestia was worried about how you were doing. Just be yourself, and I know Twilight will treat you good,” he reassured me. I let out the breath I had been holding, normal color returning to my face. “Thanks, Spike.” I managed a smile, trying to internalize my panic. “Any seat but Twilight’s is fine, just make yourself comfortable. I’ll let her know you’re here.” He turned and walked out of the room. I took a seat in Pinkie’s chair. I figured if anypony would mind the least, it would be her. I looked at the table closely. It wasn’t so much a table, but a map of Equestria, in 3-D. I studied the mountain ranges and looked at the towns on the map. I had traced a route to a town called Appleloosa with my eyes when Princess Twilight entered. I rose and bowed deeply. “Your Highness, it’s a great pleasure to finally meet you,” I said, my voice shaking with nervousness. She chuckled. “You don’t have to bow to me,” she said, “and you can just call me Twilight. Please, take a seat,” she said, sitting in the chair with her cutie mark on it. I returned to Pinkie’s chair. She indicated a chair next to her, which was marked with an eight- pointed star in purple and white, with blue-green curlicues rising from it. “Come and sit up here, so this way we don’t have to yell to each other across the table,” she suggested. Moving closer, I sat down in the chair she indicated. “Forgive me, but I’m a bit nervous about being here,” I said. Twilight looked concerned, and a bit surprised. “Why would meeting me make you nervous?” I took a calming breath. “The best way I could describe it is being called into your supervisor’s office for a performance review. You don’t think you’ve done anything wrong, but you’re never quite sure if this is the time you’re going to be released from your employment for some unknown transgression.” I looked down at the table. “There have been times, in previous employment back on my home world, that I was called for one of these reviews and, despite thinking everything was going great because no one had said anything negative to me, I found out that there were bigger problems than I could have suspected. That’s why I’m so nervous, and I guess I’m afraid that, at worst, you’d be telling me I have to leave here and return to my home world.” Twilight smiled and touched a hoof to my hand. “I can assure you that what you just described is not going to happen. The ponies I’ve spoken to around town speak very highly of you, Spike thinks you’re super, and I was actually quite nervous about meeting you, with all of the incidents that have been taking place recently.” I relaxed, and smiled. “Twilight, I’m quite happy here, so now you have nothing to worry about.” “I know Princess Celestia will be glad to know that, especially with two more human families leaving,” Twilight said with a touch of sadness. “Wait, two more? As of when?” I asked, stunned. “As of two days ago,” Twilight sighed. “The princesses aren’t sure if it was new, or related to that meet-up they held. You were there, weren’t you?” Twilight asked. I nodded slowly. “Yeah, I was there.” It seemed like a good idea, on paper. Invite the new human residents to the palace in Canterlot and let them mingle with the ponies of Canterlot. Similar parties worked well in Appleloosa, and like mine in Ponyville, so why wouldn’t it work in Canterlot? What actually took place was something even the princesses could not foresee happening, and it shocked them to the very core. Admittedly, at the onset, the gathering started out nice, and I was able to speak to some of the other humans that had accepted the invitation. Some of the nobility had already arrived, and for the most part, they were friendly enough. The tide turned during the course of the evening, as more of the nouveau riche nobles started showing up and treating all of the humans, myself included, as beneath them, and existing solely for their own entertainment. If capital punishment had existed, and if Princess Luna could have had her way, many heads would have rolled the next morning. Saying the experience left a sour taste in many of the humans’ mouths, mine included, would be an understatement. Spike entered, carrying a tray with a pot of coffee, two cups, a creamer, and a sugar bowl. I nodded a quick ‘thank you’ and waited for Twilight to fix her coffee before preparing mine. As I took a sip, Twilight asked, “So, what do you think went wrong? Princess Celestia knew I was meeting with you, and asked me to try to get your take on the evening.” I swallowed my coffee. “May I speak bluntly, Twilight?” I asked. Twilight nodded. “You may, if you don’t object to what you say being sent to the princesses. They’re the ones that really want to know your opinion about that night, I’m more curious than anything.” “One thing we all noticed was that many of the Canterlot nobles treated us not as equals, but as animals in a traveling circus. They wanted us to perform on command, do little tricks for their amusement. It offended one couple so bad that they left for our home world that night, just left it all behind and took off. Many others just stomped off and went back to their homes. Can’t say I blamed them actually.” “But you stayed the entire night,” Twilight interjected. “Indeed I did. And I had a blast exposing those mental midgets for what they were – mindless trendoids that were only concerned with their status and social ranking.” I sipped my coffee and continued. “It’s possible I had more experience dealing with those types of idiots than some of the other humans, but one thing I refused to let happen was for them to make me feel inferior to them in any way. I even came out on top during many of those mental jousts.” “And your party here went a lot smoother,” remarked Twilight. “I talked to Pinkie about it when I got back into town. What do you think was the reason?” “Because the ponies here are more grounded than those hoi-polloi airheads in Canterlot. Granted, I’m basing it on only the ponies I’ve met, and I’ve never really explored Canterlot all that much. I’m sure there are some nice ponies living there, and I did meet a few before the evening took its turn for the worse. The ponies here in Ponyville don’t hide their feelings. If they like you, you’ll know. Same if they hate your guts. But first and foremost, they treated me like an equal. Just another regular Joe, not as an inferior species. There was no pretense, no putting on airs … anything they said or did felt genuine.” Twilight thought about all of this. “I’m inclined to agree with you. When I first came to town, they accepted me as me, not as Princess Celestia’s protege.” With her magic, she floated over a piece of parchment and rolled it tight. “I’ll have Spike send this to the princesses in a little while. Now then, since the official business is out of the way, how about we sit and get to know each other a bit?” Twilight asked. I smiled. “That’s a delightful idea, Twilight.” She smiled in return. *~*~*~*~* It was a beautifully cool night. I sat outside in the backyard, watching the pegasi move the clouds into position for the big storm scheduled to occur in the morning. With a glass of sweet tea sitting on the table next to me, I laid back and thought about how far I had come in my life, and everything that I had done up to arriving here in Equestria. Twilight was a gracious hostess, with a seemingly boundless source of curiosity. She peppered me with questions about my past, what life on my home planet was like, what I missed most, what I liked about living here. I did my best to answer everything as completely as I could. She seemed quite sad to have to end our chat, but “royal duty calls,” she said, and we made arrangements to talk again very soon. The night sky here was different from the one I knew. The biggest difference being that the royal sisters controlled the rising and setting of the sun and moon. I was also amazed to see so much night sky, without the effects of light pollution. It got pretty dark out here, but the natural light of the moon and some of the brighter stars more than made up for that. A soft, almost imperceptible beating of large wings and a soft thump on the ground behind me alerted me that I had a visitor. Only one pony took the time to stop in at this time of night. I turned and smiled at Princess Luna as she folded in her wings. “Hello, Luna,” I said, “the cushions are all there for you.” Luna smiled as she approached. “Wast thou alerted to our arrival, or dost thou always keep cushions ready for unexpected guests?” “Mostly the latter,” I chuckled. “Given that I only know one pony that prefers the lounge chairs.” Luna set up the cushions and settled in. “We are most pleased that thou art making friends in town. Even Twilight Sparkle is impressed with thee.” I nodded. “High praise indeed.” I poured Luna a glass of tea. “So, is this social or business?” Luna took the glass with her magic and took a long drink. “Business, mostly. Three more families have departed for the human world today, we weren’t sure if ‘t be true thou had heard.” “Three?” I asked, surprised. “Twilight told me of two earlier today. Who was the third?” “The family we placed in Manehattan,” Luna said with a sigh. “They sent their notice to Tia and were gone within the hour.” “Oh yes, I remember them,” I said, searching my memory. “I spoke to them at the get-together at the castle. Lovely people.” I looked over at Luna. “Can you tell me the reason they gave? If not, I understand...” “Nay, privacy prevents us from speaking such,” Luna said apologetically. “But, it upset Tia to the point that she’s considering canceling the project.” I remained silent for a few minutes, draining my glass, before turning to Luna. “So … is that a subtle hint that I should begin packing my things because I’m about to be sent back?” I asked quietly. “What? Oh, nay, nay! All humans that are still here are allowed to stay indefinitely,” Luna explained quickly. “We refer to accepting new applicants. Tia thinks we should devote our time and energy to watching over those that remain and making sure that any concerns are addressed as quick as possible.” I released the breath I had been holding. “Well, that’s good news. I’ve actually grown to like it here, and I’ve met some wonderful ponies that I now call friends. I’d hate to have to leave that behind.” I thought for a moment. “I also think I know why the Manehattan family left.” “Oh?” Luna asked, intrigued. “Wouldst thou care to share thy hypothesis?” “Certainly,” I said, pouring myself another glass of tea and topping off Luna’s. “When I spoke to them, they told me that they were originally from a small town in the middle of the country. And I mean small. Appleloosa would have dwarfed them in population alone.” I took a sip. “All they knew were small-town ways, where neighbors all knew and got to know each other, they lived at a more relaxed pace … and they were set into a major metropolis, very busy, noisy, crowded, no one got to know anyone and no one really cared. They told me they wanted to transfer, but their application was rejected.” Luna looked shocked. “So, if ‘t be true they had been allowed to move to, say, Appleloosa or Dodge Junction...” “They might still be here,” I finished. “It wasn’t a failure of the program, but a simple miscalculation of living arrangements.” “But, it is from a large city from whence thou came, and thou hast adapted to life in this small town rather quickly,” Luna queried. “I also spent a good portion of my life in small towns and farming communities,” I answered, “and didn’t move to the bigger cities until I was much older. So, it was easier for me to adjust downward than it would be for someone to adjust upward, if that makes sense.” “Surprisingly, that maketh perfect sense.” Luna smiled a little. “We shall speak with our sister and arrange for a more careful screening of the people we talk to and learn more about how and whither those people lived. ” I took another sip of tea. “Glad I could be of help.” “There is one other thing we wanted to ask of thee,” Luna said hesitantly, “and thou art free to decline, of course.” “You don’t want to use me for medical research, do you?” I asked, half-jokingly. Luna chuckled and shook her head. “Nay, we were wondering if ‘t be true thou would be willing to come to Canterlot for a few weeks and perform thy handyman service thither. Word of your prowess has spread amongst the nobles and they clamor for thee to come and work for them.” I remained expressionless. “Frankly, I’d rather be the medical experiment.” Luna rolled her eyes. “Oh, comest on, thou knowest all of them are not wicked in their ways.” “Forgive me, but what party were you at that night?” I replied. “All I seem to remember is being introduced by Celestia, and being treated like the opening act of the freak show. They were told we were reasonably intelligent beings, yes?” Luna raised a hoof. “Okay, we admit that mayhap some of the nobility got a little out of hoof--” I snorted. “More than ‘a little.’” “But our point is thus,” Luna continued, “that there are good nobles out thither, many of whom attended not that gathering that night, who would like a chance to interact with thee. They have stated their willingness to pay any price for thy services, simply for a chance to see thee at work. We can even put thee up at the castle, to save the expense of a hostel. Shall thou at least consider our proposal?” Images of instant wealth began to dance through my head before I was able to finally subdue them and place them in a tight-fitting cage. Luna had no reason to lie to me; in fact, Luna has been the most open of the royal sisters since my arrival. Could it have been possible that I didn’t get a full sampling of the nobility in Canterlot, instead seeing perhaps the most boorish of the lot? I sighed, and took out my calendar book. “Okay, I’ll do it. I can leave the day after tomorrow, which should give me enough time to let my regulars know and spread word around town that I’ll be gone for--” I looked ahead on the calendar-- “about a week. If it goes well, I can make myself available for special calls.” I closed the book after making my notations. “I will have to adjust the rate schedule a bit, owing to travel costs and such, but it will be reasonable.” Luna smiled. “We are sure that shan’t be a major issue. And we are joyful that thou hast decided to reconsider thy stance.” “Well, if I encounter the type of behavior I encountered at the gathering, the deal’s off and I come back here. I’m hopeful that I shouldn’t have to invoke that condition.” Luna nods. “Fair enough.” I smile, and go into the house quickly. Luna watches me curiously as I return with a small tray of snack cakes. Round in shape, they are covered with a chocolate coating. “I managed to successfully recreate a dessert treat from my home world. It’s a thin vanilla cake with marshmallow filling, covered with a chocolate ganache. Would you like to try one?” I offered. Luna levitated one close to her muzzle, giving it a few sniffs, before taking a bite. Her expression changed to one of curiosity to one of delight. “Mm, these are quite tasty,” she said after swallowing her sample. “I’m glad you like them,” I said. “They’re called, ‘moon pies.’” > Another Day at the Office > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 4. Another Day At the Office I had only been to Canterlot once since my arrival, and that was that disastrous get-together between the nobility and the newly-arrived humans, which caused lots of hurt feelings and eventually led to several of the human families expressing regret and contemplate leaving, with one packing and leaving that very night. The wounds ran deep, and I admit to feeling that, with the exception of the princesses and very few of the nobility, Canterlot was full of stuck-up snobs who were more full of crap than they were of themselves, if that was even possible. Naturally, when I was asked if I would be willing to travel to Canterlot and perform basically the same services I did here in Ponyville, I was skeptical to say the very least. I saw it as a way for those stick-up-their-bum nobles to point and laugh about how the monkey can do simple tasks, oh ho ho ho...and not surprisingly, I wanted absolutely no part of it. Had the meaning not been lost, when Luna initially proposed the idea, I would have informed her I would rather have terminal jock itch. She persisted, and we agreed that I would spend a week there, do what was asked in terms of my handyman duties, and be paid for my service. I figured I would charge my standard rate, plus fifteen percent for travel expense. Hey, they didn’t have to know I was living in the castle the whole time, with free room and board, as a guest of my friend Luna. I sat at dinner on the fourth night with Luna and Celestia, as I had every night since my arrival. They were quite accommodating with their hospitality, although I still felt like I was invited to the boss’s house for dinner and one little slip- up meant bye-bye Equestria. Of course, I handled myself in my usual style, namely, by keeping my head down and only speaking when spoken to. Celestia picked up on this my first night there. After reassurances that no such thing would be forthcoming, and I was not an employee but a welcomed guest, I began to feel a little more at ease. I still kept my guard up, but not as much as I had previously. “How did things go today?” Celestia asked while we waited for our dinners to arrive. “Fairly well,” I responded. “I only had the one job scheduled today, because it looked on paper to be fairly complex. It only took half the time I allotted, but I guess that’s the benefit of having a newer house.” “Whom didst thou see today?” Luna queried. Celestia quirked an eyebrow upon hearing Luna speak in Old Ponish. She had been aware of her sister’s activities, but had not heard her speak it in her presence. I think she may have been more amazed that I didn’t react to it at all, treating it as an everyday thing and not making a fuss over it. “Mister … Fancy Pants, yes, that’s it. I don’t recall if he was one of the ones at the party, but he seemed quite nice. As did his companion, Miss Fleur.” “Fancy is one of the nicer nobles,” Celestia stated. “He always considers the other pony first, regardless of status or stature. What happened after the work was done?” “He and Fleur offered to take me to lunch, which I accepted. We had a great time talking about various things, and after lunch they showed me around town a bit more.” Celestia grinned. “Sounds like your experiences have been quite positive so far.” “We told thee, not all the nobles are bad ponies,” Luna reminded me. “No, so far, the ones I’ve met have been fairly decent.” I smiled as the dinner trays were brought out. “And I will agree that not all of the nobility is evil incarnate, just a percentage.” “Good,” Celestia proclaimed. “I’m glad we can find common ground.” The rest of the week in Canterlot went surprisingly well. There was only one minor hiccup, when a stallion on the street, one of the hoity-toity types from the gathering, decided it would be a good idea to tell me at great length just how badly the princesses had botched in allowing us ‘sub-monkeys,’ to use his words, to live amongst the pure pony race in Equestria. Amazingly, when I told him that I would be sure to bring up our little chat with Celestia and Luna at dinner that night, and the next day they would be more than willing to personally speak to him so he could further expound on his position, he grew suddenly silent and trotted off rather quickly. Needless to say, I told both Celestia and Luna about the whole incident at dinner, as I had promised. I don’t think he was too happy during his visit to the palace the next morning. Possibly less so by the promise of a visit from a certain alicorn while he slumbered the night before. *~*~*~*~* The room was as dark as I could possibly make it. I lay on my sofa, a cold cloth covering my eyes. Soft music played through the speakers on my computer. Thanks to my week in Canterlot, I was able to afford myself some downtime, being available to the ponies back in Ponyville on an emergency basis. Things were kind of slow around town, and the Apples really didn’t need a lot of help. This made me grateful that my headache didn’t spring up when I was in the middle of my busy time, nor on my trip. This is the type of headache that makes light cause physical pain, makes you nauseous, and generally incapacitates you until it decides to go away. The knock on my door roused me from my rest and I slowly got up and trudged over to the door. Opening it, I saw a unicorn pony I thought I recognized from the welcome party here in town. She had a white coat, with a multi-hued blue mane and tail. Most noticeably, she wore large sunglasses that completely obscured her eyes. Make that barely saw, as the sunlight reacted with my headache, and having been in the dark for most of the day, the brightness was overwhelming. I found myself longing for a pair of those glasses as the sun bathed everything in a painful aura that seemed to be brighter than it actually was. Still, I did what I could to be polite and see if I could help this pony with whatever brought them to my door in the first place. “Hello, how can I help you?” I asked, shielding my eyes from the bright sun light and trying to sound like I wasn’t mere moments away from death. “Hey, I know your sign says you’re closed except for emergencies. I, um...kinda have one, and I was hoping you could help me…?” she asked. Squinting in the sunlight, I could see she had a turntable held in her magic. The daylight was threatening to make my head explode. “Yeah, head on over to the shop entrance and let me see what I can do for you,” I grunted, pointing to the smaller shed attached to the main house. “Dude, you’re a lifesaver, thanks!” she said, sounding relieved. She trotted over to the workshop as I closed the door. Stumbling over to the workshop and turning on some low lighting, I opened the door and waved her inside. “Just set that down on the workbench there. What seems to be the problem with it?” I asked. She set it down gently. “The left channel’s going in and out. I know it’s not the cable, cuz I tested that with my other deck and it worked fine, and the cable from that deck is doing the same thing.” I picked it up and found the screws holding it together. “You okay with me opening this up to take a look?” I asked. “Oh yeah, dude, it’s cool. My regular repair pony is out of town, and I heard you’re pretty good with those hand things of yours.” She took a seat on a stool opposite me at the bench. I picked up a small screwdriver. “Okay then, let’s see what we got here.” Upon opening the turntable, I quickly saw that my suspicion was correct. “Yeah, here’s the problem.” Adjusting the magnifier so the pony could see, I pointed to the audio jack under the magnifier with a small screwdriver. “The solder joint broke free of the board. I can reheat that and put a fresh bead down to hold it in place.” She sighed audibly. “Oh, thank Celestia, I was afraid I’d have to buy a whole new one. These things ain’t cheap, you know.” I nodded. “Yeah, in either world.” I plugged my soldering iron in and let it heat. “So, I know you were at the welcome party, but I didn’t get to talk to you much...or get your name, for that matter.” “Vinyl Scratch, known professionally in Equestria as DJ-PON3,” she replied, holding out a hoof. I hoofbumped her and smiled. “Pleasure to meet you,” I said. Vinyl cocked her ear. “Is that human music I hear?” she asked. I nodded. “Yeah, just some soft stuff to help me relax and get rid of this headache. I also have some speakers wired up here in the shop.” Vinyl perked up a bit. “I’ve been curious about the type of music humans listen to. Would it be okay if I came over some time and went through some of it?” “Yeah, that’s perfectly fine. I’d offer today, but once I finish this I’m gonna go lay back down for a while.” Vinyl grinned. “It’s okay, I got a gig later tonight anyway, and I need to get ready. Which is why I’m here.” I checked the soldering iron and found it was ready. “All right, let’s get this patched up.” Vinyl watched me work, amazed at the dexterity in my fingers and the delicate approach I took to fixing her precious equipment. I checked the solder joint on the other connector as well, and found it too was working loose. I opted to reinforce that while I had it here. I put the cover back on and fastened the screws. “There, that should do it. I’d let this rest for a couple of hours before plugging anything into it, just to be sure the solder has set properly.” “Dude, you’re awesome! What do I owe ya?” she inquired. “Fifteen bits, half my hourly labor rate,” I answered. She levitated the money over to me and picked up the turntable in her magic. “Hey, when you’re feeling better, you should come check out one of my shows. I’m resident in a club in town, I think you’ll like it.” “Sounds good to me,” I replied. “And, if you wanna come over maybe tomorrow or the next day, if I’m not out on a call, I can go through my music library with you.” She grinned. “It’s a go, dude. Catch ya later!” She turned and trotted out of the shop. I latched the door behind her and turned out the lights in the shop. Even in the low light, the detailed work I had to do made my head pound more. I figured I’d refresh my cloth and take some more aspirin before laying back down. *~*~*~*~* One thing I had noticed since my arrival in Equestria is that the crime level is practically non-existent. I honestly can’t recall any instances of petty crimes occurring since my arrival. In fact, I was even more surprised that most ponies leave their doors unlocked even when they go out to run errands around town. Being the paranoid type that I am, and because I don’t like others snooping through my stuff, I tend to lock up the house when I go out on a service call, and the shop I keep locked unless I’m physically in there, mostly to protect my tools. I’ve relaxed a bit and have taken to leaving my door unlocked when I’m home. I’ve learned through talking with the ponies that it takes a long time and a great deal of trust on both parts to simply wander into someone’s home without knocking. After Vinyl’s departure, I refreshed my cool, damp cloth and took a couple more aspirins before laying down on the sofa again. The aspirin had done their trick, and I was snoozing lightly on the couch, cold compress over my eyes. In my dreams I was walking through the unspoiled landscape, the sun shining overhead, and a gentle, intermittent breeze blowing. I stopped, and let the breeze blow against my face. I noticed that, in addition to being warm, it had the scent of apple-flavored oatmeal. It also stopped and started at regular intervals, almost as if the sky was … breathing. … Wait a minute. Returning to consciousness, I slowly removed the cloth from my eyes, and upon opening them I was looking directly at a yellow pony with a pinkish bow in her mane. She was staring at me intently, breathing slowly across my face. “Hey, Apple Bloom, what’s up?” I asked in the most nonchalant way I could. “Applejack wants ta know if y’all can come by the farm and help work on the plow,” she stated. “Sure, that won’t be a problem. You need me there now, or…?” “Nah, she said tomorrow mornin’s fine, as long as it’s early. Big Mac’s got a lot of plowin’ ta do ‘n they need ta git it done quick.” I nodded. “Okay, I’ll be there bright and early in the morning.” I slowly sat up. “Um...just how long were you sitting there?” I asked. “Oh, ‘bout five minutes or so. Ah was jus’ gettin’ ready to poke ya and wake ya up.” I pondered this bit of information. “I see. Okay, was there anything else you needed today?” Apple Bloom smiled. “Jus’ mah messenger fee.” I smiled and got off the sofa. We walked to the kitchen and I brought down a plastic container, inside of which were little rolls of pie dough filled with brown sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg. I removed two and set them on a napkin. “There ya go. You gonna eat them here or take them with you?” It was a silly question to ask, as no sooner had I set the pastries down then they were gobbled up. Flashing a big smile, she said, “Thanks! See ya tomorrow mornin’!” and let herself out, closing the door behind her. I chuckled. Just another normal day in Ponyville, I thought to myself. *~*~*~*~* The sun had barely poked over the hills surrounding the farm when Applejack and I set to work fixing the plow. There were several stress fractures showing on the wooden supports, and Applejack had special metal cleats made to secure the weaker points. Applejack had called for me to assist because I could generate better torque on the bolts than she could, surprisingly enough. That, and I still had my torque wrench from when I lived in the human world. I’m pretty sure that was the real reason. “Looks like ya survived yer Canterlot trip,” Applejack remarked as we worked. “Ya didn’t have any trouble up there, didya?” “Nah,” I replied, securing a metal cleat over the cracked wood. “Just some inappropriate comments that were quickly dealt with once I reported them to the princesses.” I finished tightening the bolts and checked the tightness of the cleat. “There, that should hold for now. I think eventually you’re gonna need a whole new rig for this thing. There’s only so much we can cobble together to keep it intact.” Applejack nodded. “Yeah, Ah know. Ah was jus’ tryin’ to hold off for the rest of the season. Ah reckon Ah better tell Mac not ta pull so dang hard – he’s always tryin’ to git it done as quick as he can.” “Can’t say I blame him, it seems like very tedious work.” “Yeah, but he’s killin’ the plow.” She looked it over carefully. “All right, Ah think that’s the last of the patches we need. You wanna settle up now?” I shook my head. “End of the week’s good, I know you’re good for it.” “Well, least we c’n do is feed ya since you’re out so early. Granny’s makin’ apple pancakes for breakfast, and you’re welcome to join us as always.” Apple pancakes held a special place in my heart. I still remember breakfasts at Grandma’s house, with her placing thinly-sliced apple into the pancake batter on the griddle. Granny Smith’s recipe was almost as good as Grandma’s – okay, it was exactly as good, truth be told maybe a little better, but they can never replace the memories of my youth. I smiled. “Lead the way, then.” The two of us walked up to the farmhouse. > A Grand invitation > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5. A Grand Invitation “Oh, hey, Spike. What brings you by so early?” I asked the small purple dragon on my doorstep. “This scroll came for you last night,” Spike replied, handing over the roll of parchment. “Princess Celestia sent it to us and asked me to deliver it today. I guess she didn’t want it getting misdirected or something.” I took the scroll and removed the wax seal with the signet of the solar princess stamped into it. Unrolling the scroll, two golden pieces of paper fluttered to the floor. I picked them up and quickly noticed that this wasn’t paper at all, but actual gold. I began to skim through the letter. “Dear… ...cordially invited...Grand Galloping Gala...held at the Royal Palace… … ...yourself and a guest… ...look forward to seeing you.” I rolled the scroll up. “Hm. What the heck’s a Grand Galloping Gala?” “It’s like the biggest event in all of Equestria!” Spike enthused. “It’s invitation only, lasts pretty much all night, and it never goes the same way twice. Something crazy always happens at the Gala.” “I see,” I replied, pondering. “I’m guessing all of the upper-class and nobility will be there as well?” Spike nodded. “Yeah, pretty much.” I studied the tickets in my hands carefully, weighing my options. “Come in, Spike, I’ll be in need of your messenger services.” “Really? You’re not gonna use your candle? How come?” Spike queried as we walked toward my office. “Same reason Princess Celestia didn’t. I don’t want it misdirected and I want it sent by someone I trust.” Once we reached the office, I sat behind my desk and grabbed a piece of parchment. One lesson I had learned early is that for sending messages via dragonfire, using regular paper only made the message turn to ash without being sent. The parchment was magically infused so it would not only resist being destroyed, but would instead turn to a magical smoke that would reconstitute upon reaching its destination. I scribbled a quick note, wrapped the tickets up, and tied the whole thing together with a small red ribbon. I handed the scroll to Spike. “Okay, ready for sending.” Spike pinched the scroll between two of his fingers and breathed a gentle stream of dragonfire over it. It quickly dissolved into smoke and wafted out of the open window. “All sent,” he said, smiling. “Excellent. Guess it’s time for the messenger fee,” I said, rising from my desk. Spike’s grin got wider and his eyes lit up. I chuckled as we walked back towards the front door. There are three kinds of messenger fees I end up paying. The first is the regular fee, payable in the form of bits to the pony that sends or delivers my messages. The second, for the Cutie Mark Crusaders, takes the form of pastries or other sweet treats. The third, for dragon messengers, involves gemstones. I retrieved a container from a high shelf and opened the lid. I selected the fattest gem I could find and handed it to Spike. “Here you go, for sending and receiving, plus your speedy service.” I watched as Spike slowly took the gem from my hands and wondered if I would need a mop to clean up all of the dragon drool. Spike swallowed, and licked his lips in anticipation. “Thanks! If anything else comes, I’ll run it right over!” He took off quickly, an almost fanatical look on his face as he studied the treat I had given him. *~*~*~*~* Later that afternoon, while out in town after completing a special call for service, I was approached by Princess Twilight. She had a concerned look on her face, and she asked me, “Is everything all right?” I was stunned by that question, not knowing what prompted it. “Um, yeah, everything’s fine, why?” “Princess Celestia told me she had sent you tickets to the Gala,” Twilight explained, “and that you had sent them back and said you weren’t going. She asked me to talk to you about it, just in case you didn’t want to talk to her for some reason.” “Oh,” I replied, scanning around for a good place to have a conversation. I spotted a small cafe nearby. “Let’s get some coffee and we’ll talk. My treat.” Twilight nodded and followed along with me to the cafe. Twilight and I sat at an outside table, sipping at our coffees. “I don’t understand why she thinks I’m mad at her. All I did was turn down an invitation to this gala thingy,” I said. “That’s just it,” Twilight pointed out. “Nopony has ever turned down an offer to go the Gala before.” She pauses. “Well, I did, but only because I only received two tickets and I wasn’t going to play favorites among my friends to see who was gonna go. She ended up sending tickets for everypony and the day was saved. But something like this? This is unprecedented, and it has Princess Celestia concerned.” “Twilight,” I said, putting my cup down, “I have nothing but the utmost respect for the princesses, and I am very grateful to them for giving me the chance to live in this world. It’s as I explained in my letter – I just don’t want to spend my night surrounded by snobby, stuck-up ponies that think the entire universe revolves around them.” “That’s another thing that has her concerned,” Twilight mentioned. “She wants to know why you aren’t willing to give them a second chance. You’ve seen firsthoof that not all of the nobility is as you described.” “This is true,” I answered, “some of them, at least the ones I did work for, were quite pleasant. However, some are even worse than those I had the misfortune to be around at the gathering. Twilight, if you spent the evening made to feel inferior, being constantly put down because of who you are, treated as a plaything rather than an intelligent being, would you really want to hang around with them again, much less give them a second chance to become your friends?” “Obviously, you’ve forgotten about my dealings with Trixie, that magician mare I told you about,” Twilight answered. “We didn’t get along too great at first, and I admit, seeing her with Starlight was a bit of a shock, but I did eventually get to see that she really is a fairly decent pony.” I recalled doing some work for Trixie recently, making some minor repairs to her wagon/stage. “Yeah, she does have that showbiz air of superiority, but even she treated me with a modicum of respect, something those stuck-up snobs were severely lacking.” I sipped my drink. “Look, I’m going back to Canterlot tomorrow morning. If Princess Celestia wants, we can get together and talk about this before I head back here.” Twilight smiled. “I’ll mention that when I write to her. She wanted to know what you said to me about all of this, and I’m sure she might even let you stay in the palace if you don’t want to travel back that night. What time are you leaving?” “I’ll be catching the first train out in the morning,” I said. “Please let her know I don’t want her to go to any trouble for me, and I look forward to seeing her again.” *~*~*~*~* That evening, I was joined at my house by Vinyl Scratch, who was eager to sample the different types of human music that I had saved to my computer, along with Octavia Melody, the cellist that I had seen at a couple of events in town. She didn’t seem pleased to be sitting in my living room as Vinyl listened to song after song that I had loaded into a playlist especially for her, focusing mainly on the music that shared similarities to the style she played at my welcoming party. Returning from the kitchen, I set a cup of tea down on the table in front of the sofa, and sat down in my chair, facing Octavia. “I’m sorry about this, I had no idea she’d bring you along even if you didn’t want to go. I hope this isn’t interfering with any plans you may have made previously.” Octavia smiled a weary smile. “Oh no, I assure you, it’s nothing to do with you. I’m just very tired after a long day of rehearsal, and I do admit, some of this music isn’t quite to my liking.” She took the teacup and sipped some tea. “Is all human music similar to what Vinyl plays at those clubs?” “No,” I replied, “that was a recent development and I’m not really a big fan of it, either. But, I had to play it when people asked for it, and I just kept it. Some of it wasn’t that bad, to be honest.” Vinyl perked up. “You used to DJ?” “Not professionally, and not like you do,” I explained. “I had wanted to when I was younger, and even bought a small setup that I could bring to parties and things. I used to practice at being on the radio, doing some voiceovers and queueing in music.” “Like the stuff I heard in your workshop?” Vinyl asked. “Yeah, like that.” I looked over at Octavia. “Perhaps, when you’re in a better frame of mind, I could offer some samples of a more, shall we say, serene type of music from my old world?” “Actually, I wouldn’t mind hearing something more…milder,” Octavia responded. She shot a look to Vinyl. “When would be a good time to schedule such an evening?” Let’s see,” I replied, checking my calendar. “I’ll be in Canterlot tomorrow and the next day, but I seem to be free any time after that. My evenings are pretty wide open, so I can work with your schedule.” Octavia smiled. “Very well, then. I shall be in touch in a couple of days to set a time.” “That sounds good,” I enthused. “I can even arrange dinner if it would make things easier for you. I know a few pony-friendly recipes I think you may enjoy. Of course, Vinyl is welcome too, if she won’t be too put off by my musical selections.” “Nah, dude,” Vinyl answered. “I’ve been looking for some slow jams to add to my sets, maybe I can find something I can use. And I never turn down a free dinner.” I looked back at Octavia after Vinyl had finished. “So then … dinner and music at your convenience?” I asked. Octavia nodded, and grinned. “I’m looking forward to it.” *~*~*~*~*~ “Are you sure you won’t reconsider?” Celestia asked me over dinner the next evening. “I cannot, and will not, force you to attend, of course…but your presence there would add something special to the Gala this year, especially in light of the other families leaving so abruptly.” After a day of doing odd jobs around town, for ponies whose character Fancy Pants could personally vouch for, I found myself having to soothe a worried Princess Celestia. Princess Luna seemed to be taking the news that I had refused Gala tickets in stride, not showing any concern about it at all. She also knew my feelings about many of the upper crust that would be attending, feelings she seemed to share. I set my fork down. “Princess, I understand, really I do. It’s just that… well, the scars from that party still run pretty deep, and I’m really not much of a formal-party-type person. Take Pinkie’s party, for example. It was a more relaxed atmosphere, everypony was beyond nice and polite, and I didn’t feel ill at ease being in such a large crowd, another unfortunate quirk of mine. I do apologize, but my answer still stands.” “And it’s not because of anything I, or my sister, may have done?” “I give you my word,” I said with all sincerity. “It has nothing to do with you or Luna personally. You two have been very accommodating, and I’ve enjoyed my chats with Luna during the night. I also enjoy the time we spend together, limited though it’s been, but I realize you’re very busy. I have nothing but the deepest respect and admiration for the both of you.” Celestia relaxed. “I’m very glad to hear you say that. Granted, we may both be authority figures, but we also wish to be your friends, as we do with all of our little ponies. I’m happy that you think of us in that fashion.” I smiled. “I do, very much. So, is everything good between us as far as the Gala is concerned?” Celestia nodded. “I fully respect your decision, and will let the matter drop. However, should you change your mind, please let me know, and I will send tickets to you.” I picked up my fork again. ‘You have a deal.” *~*~*~*~* The path ahead led toward a dark and mysterious forest, and it was on this path that I found myself en-route to perform my services. It was a special request from Princess Twilight, not long after I had returned from Canterlot. She had asked me if I would be willing to travel out to see somepony named Zecora and fix a few small items for her, if I was able. Thinking nothing more of it, I agreed, only to learn the specifics about this mysterious Zecora. I was told she was a zebra, the only one in Equestria that was known, and she could seem a bit, in Twilight’s words, ‘unusual.’ She also chose to make her home in what was known as the Everfree Forest. I learned that very few ponies travel through there voluntarily, as it was filled with all kinds of nefarious plant and animal life. The weather was wild and untamed, moving on its own, not under control of the weather pegasi. Not being the type to refuse helping out, and not being overly concerned about this spooky ol’ forest, I agreed to ride out there and see what I could do. I followed the directions that Twilight had provided and I was soon slowly riding along the only path into the forest. The path was only recently cleared and widened slightly, to accommodate those working on exploring and preserving the original Castle of the Two Sisters. From what I read in the history books I was able to check out of the library, the Everfree wasn’t always the wild and unruly place it is today. At one point, Celestia and Luna ruled from here, from a magnificent castle in the heart of the forest. These were happier times. Before what I refer to as ‘The Great Unpleasantness’ so as not to spark any horrible memories from either princess. I made my turn and noticed that the forest grew darker as I continued, the tight canopy of trees blocking much of the available sunlight from reaching the forest floor below. Ambient noises seemed amplified, and an eerie sense of being watched settled over me as I rode along. Shrugging it off, I stayed on the path until I arrived at Zecora’s house. Being that it was the only house out here, I was certain I had the correct place. Small tool kit in hand, I approached the door and knocked. The door opened and a zebra eyed me warily. “A creature I have never seen before. Tell me, what brings you to my door?” she asked. I smiled and introduced myself. “I’m the handyman Princess Twilight spoke of, I’m here to make those repairs you needed.” Zecora smiled and stepped to the side. “Ah, the princess speaks very highly of you. Please, enter and see what you can do.” I walked inside and took a quick look around. “This is a very nice house you have here, Miss Zecora. Are most of these items from your native land, or did you craft them yourself?” Zecora walked alongside me. “From my home land, some are indeed. The rest were made as I saw the need.” She sighed. “Thinking of home makes my emotions swell; I’m sure you know this feeling as well.” “I do get homesick now and then,” I replied, “but it’s mostly nostalgia for things I can’t find here. So, what did you need me to look at today?” She escorted me over to a table, upon which sat an ornately carved wooden box. It looked remarkably well cared for, with fine inlays of precious gems, and a golden latching mechanism on the front. She pointed to the button on the front. “Push the button, and up the lid would spring,” she explained. “Now, sadly, it does no such thing. The latch and button still work, you see, but why it won’t raise is beyond me.” I looked over the box, studying the hinges and latch. “This is beautiful. Is this something from your home?” Zecora nodded. “I have had this box for many a year. It is one of the things I hold most dear.” Slipping on a pair of cotton gloves that I used for handling delicate items, I carefully pushed the latch and opened the lid of the box. I could see that there was a small spring that let the lid pop open once the latch was released. The wood that held the spring in place had cracked and allowed the spring to slip in such a way that the spring was no longer in contact with the box. “I can fix this. I can use a special glue I have to fix the brace and put the spring back in position. Should only take a couple of minutes to do.” Zecora looked relieved. “To hear such news is a welcome relief. Losing this box would cause me grief. Do what you must to make it like new, and I will gather some pay for you.” I shook my head. “I won’t charge you for a few drops of glue and waiting time. However, I would gladly accept hearing about you and your home, and I could tell you about mine if you’d like.” The zebra smiled. “That sounds most agreeable to me. Perform your work, and I will make some tea.” Zecora trotted off to prepare some tea, and I made the repair. While we waited for the glue to set, we talked about our respective home lands, and our reasons for wanting to leave and start over. She told me of her difficulty at being accepted by the ponies in town, which made me feel a little guilty for the easier time I had of it, and I told her of my experience in Canterlot. After a decent amount of time had passed, I tested the latch. The box sprung open as it was designed to do, much to Zecora’s delight. “I believe that does it, unless there’s anything else you’d like me to look at,” I said, packing up my things. “If I were to prepare some more fine tea, would you stay and chat with me?” Zecora asked. “It is rare I see someone new to these lands, who works not with hooves, but with their hands.” She approached me on her way to where I guessed her kitchen was located. “My joy on meeting you knows no end; I wish to know you better as a friend. There is plenty of time before the sun will set. You will be home before then, of this do not fret.” “Miss Zecora, I would be honored to sit and talk with you,” I answered happily. The rest of the afternoon was spent in conversation, talking about our respective homelands and how we came to be in this little corner of the world. She was fascinating to listen to, and her particular way of speaking was lyrical in nature, almost weaving along in an unheard melody. It was with a measure of regret that we had to part ways, but with the setting sun and the onset of night, it would not have been safe to delay my return any longer. We parted with a promise to get together as often as our schedules would allow, and I slowly made my way home through the rugged forest called Everfree. > Friendship, Equestrian Style > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 6. Friendship, Equestrian Style “You really don’t get out much, do ya?” It started out as a nice evening with friends. Octavia had contacted me not long after I returned from Canterlot, and we made an appointment to have our dinner-and-music night a few days later. I opted to prep gazpacho, noting the very fresh vegetables would taste wonderful and the cold soup would be a refreshing change. I was correct, as both Vinyl and Octavia enjoyed the soup immensely, and the fresh bread I got from the bakery that morning was the perfect accompaniment. It was as things were winding down after dinner that Vinyl chose to drop her bombshell. Vinyl’s abrupt question stunned me as I tried to think of what would have caused her to say something like that. I glanced at Octavia, who seemed slightly embarrassed, and took a sip of my drink. “I’ve always been somewhat of a homebody, yeah, what’s the big deal?” “Well, I’ve been doing some asking around, and it seems that the only time anypony sees you is when you’re on a job or at the market, or something. And when they do see you, you really don’t talk all that much.” She looked at me over her glasses. “Dude, I’m concerned about you.” “We just met a week ago, “ I deadpanned. Vinyl clutched at her chest in a most dramatic fashion, leading me to believe she’d been taking lessons from Rarity, and let me tell you, that mare knows drama, drawing on the display I witnessed the time I had to unclog her sink. “You think that I, one of your bestest friends, would let a little thing like time get in the way of our friendship? You wound me, sir.” She feigned indignance, complete with the forehoof to the forehead. Yup, I thought to myself. Definitely Rarity lessons. Not knowing what else to do, I applauded, which got a chuckle out of Octavia. “Bravo, masterful performance,” I quipped. “Now, what’s the real reason you’re so concerned about my social life, Vinyl?” Vinyl cracked a half-smile. “Okay, you got me. It’s just that, most of the other humans all came with families, and you seem to be the only one that didn’t, as far as I know. I mean, I haven’t seen any other single humans around in Ponyville or Canterlot, I don’t know about the other places, so I could be wrong, but the point is, you’re not really going out to find yourself a special somepony…or someone, I think that’s your word.” “I see, “ I commented, intrigued. “And, I’m guessing it’s going to be your mission to drag me out of my shell and get me to mingle more? Maybe find the true love of my life?” I queried. “First, tell me why you don’t get out much,” Vinyl insisted. I sighed. “Okay. What happened is, I wasn’t a very popular kid. I had a few people that I considered friends, but as the years went on we lost touch or drifted apart for whatever reason. When I got into driving, I was spending more and more time alone, and I found it wasn’t too bad. Yeah, there were times I wanted someone around to talk to, but I guess I figured I could make it okay on my own, much like I’d been doing, and I just never broke that habit.” Vinyl was in shock. “Whoa. For someone that seems pretty cool to me, that doesn’t sound right to have to live like that.” Octavia patted my hand with her hoof and gave a sad smile. “See? Even Tavi thinks you’re okay.” “I know we’ve only just met, but I do think you are a very nice person, and I would like to consider you a friend, if that is okay with you,” Octavia said. I grinned. “Perfectly fine, Miss Octavia.” She smiled. “But what about your love life?” Vinyl blurted out, much to Octavia’s shock. “I mean, you must have had a fillyfriend or two…what’s the word you humans use?” “Girlfriend, or wife, or significant other … it depends on the type of relationship, really. And yes, I’ve had a few in my time, but for one reason or another, they didn’t work out for long. Sometimes it was my fault, other times it was hers, and there were times it was mutual. I never held a grudge about it, I just moved along.” Vinyl grinned. “You know, I could fix you up with somepony…” “Vinyl, no. Stop this now,” Octavia interrupted, to no avail. “… a pony that’s very well-mannered, sophisticated, a bit of a homebody herself …” Octavia was almost beet-red by this point. “Vinyl, please…” “… loves music, really enjoys your cooking …” It finally clicked. I leaned over to Octavia. “I’m sorry, but is Vinyl trying to set us up on a date?” I asked softly. Octavia, completely mortified at this point, nodded. “I am so, so sorry about this, I had no idea she would go this far tonight.” Now, it was my turn to console Octavia. “It’s okay, and I’m quite flattered that Vinyl thinks so highly of me that she’d try to set me up with her best friend.” Vinyl was practically bouncing in her seat. “I knew it! I knew you two would be perfect for each other!” Octavia began to protest. “Now, wait just a minute, Vinyl—” I placed a hand on her hoof. “That being said, however, and while I do appreciate Vinyl wanting her friends to be happy, trying to force a romantic relationship on two individuals that have only known each other for less than a week is never a good idea. Granted, Miss Octavia is a lovely mare—” Octavia blushed a bit at hearing that, “— and any stallion would be lucky to win her favor, and if circumstances were different I would be honored to call her my marefriend, I’m fairly confident that she thinks of me as only a new friend, not a love interest.” Vinyl sighed. “Okay, dude, I’m sorry. I just didn’t want to see ya all alone, ya know?” “I know, Vinyl, and I am touched that you worry so much. To be honest, dating hasn’t really come to mind.” Vinyl smiled. “That could always change, you know. Maybe if you and Tavi get to know each other better—” “Say, don’t you think now would be a splendid time to listen to some music?” Octavia asked, giving me a pointed look. “Oh my, yes, you’re absolutely right!” I quickly agreed. “Let’s head to the living room and I’ll bring some drinks for us. We can have dessert later on.” Vinyl huffed. “All right, fine, subject dropped. Let’s go hear whatcha got.” As we made our way to the living room, Octavia stopped me. “Do—do you really think I’m attractive?” she asked softly. I leaned down and whispered, “If it weren’t true, I wouldn’t have said it.” I smiled. I didn’t think it was possible for Octavia’s cheeks to turn any redder. *~*~*~*~* About five minutes into the music, Vinyl excused herself, claiming “super important urgent DJ business” at the club she was performing at over the weekend, conveniently leaving Octavia and I alone at my house. The awkward conversation after Vinyl stopped the music and left was broken only by long pauses and the ticking clock on the wall, as Octavia and I sat at opposite ends of the sofa, sipping our drinks and nibbling at some dessert treats I had picked up at Sugarcube Corner earlier that day. After dessert, Octavia and I had a wonderful time going through some of the the music I had selected, this batch more serene and subdued than the samples that Vinyl listened to during our previous get-together. On some of the more orchestral pieces, I even caught her attempting to mime playing along on her cello, which I took as a good sign, inasmuch as she was enjoying what I had picked out. I felt a little embarrassed that many of the songs were love-themed, and I attempted to explain to her that the selections weren’t intentional in that regard, all the while getting flustered and thinking I was really trying to get her romantically interested in me. She laughed and said she understood, she realized that music was the purest form of expressing feelings and emotions. One piece in particular intrigued her. “What is this piece from?” she asked. I glanced at the title in the player. “Oh, this song was composed for a movie. It’s a very powerful piece, and under the right circumstances, very moving.” She had her eyes closed at this point, attempting as much as possible to feel every note, every rise and fall of the music. As the song ended, she clapped her hooves together. “That was wonderful!” she gushed. “I would love to be able to perform that with the symphony. And with the Royal Canterlot Chorale…could you imagine the power this piece would have?” I was still overcome by the music. I hadn’t had that reaction to music in a long time, not since I arrived in…oh no. I quickly switched my thoughts. “I think it would be wonderful, especially as the finale after a medley of the other instrumentals.” Octavia’s eyes widened. “That’s a wonderful idea!” she exclaimed, joyfully bouncing in her seat. Her expression changed to one of concentration. “Do you think it would be possible to purchase the sheet music for these pieces?’ she asked, hopefully. “I guess it would be, if they’re not out of print …” I thought about this, and then had a wild idea. “Say, does Vinyl have any way to record music from an outside source? Maybe that way we could record the songs, and if we can’t find the sheet music for sale, maybe we could have the music transcribed.” “I’ll have to ask her,” Octavia said after a moment, “but I suspect she might. She had mentioned coming back and recording some of those other songs you had.” Glancing toward the window, I happened to catch sight of a blue mane bobbing around outside. “I get the impression that she’s not gonna be happy until we’re officially a couple,” I remarked. Octavia grinned, and chuckled. “She won’t be happy until we’re standing at the wedding chapel together.” “Probably so she’ll be able to DJ at our reception,” I said loud enough for someone outside to hear. The blue mane bobbed about. I glanced at the clock. “Oh my, is it that late already? I suspect you’d want to get home…” I said. Octavia looked at the clock and nodded. “I suppose I should, I have an early rehearsal tomorrow morning.” I stood up. “Let me walk you to the door.” Octavia rose, and followed me to the front door. Standing at the door, I said, “Miss Octavia, I had a great time this evening. Um, I know Vinyl was really pushing us to get together, and I wanted to say that I am quite content to remain friends with you, but I wouldn’t be averse to changing that if we both develop the same feelings.” I blushed and turned away. Octavia turned my face back towards hers with her hoof. “I must admit, I feel the same way. Friends for now, and we’ll see what may happen.” She rose onto her rear legs and hugged me. “Friendly hug, a custom among us ponies.” I wrapped my arms around her and returned the hug. “I like that custom.” From outside, I swore I heard a muffled “yes” from the other side of the door. We broke the hug and I reached for the doorknob. “Well, goodnight Octavia, and please let me know what Vinyl has to say about the music.” She nodded. “I will do so. Perhaps we could have another dinner together soon?” I smiled. “I’d like that.” I heard a scuffling on the front step. I shushed Octavia and slowly started to turn the doorknob. Octavia stepped back, a smirk on her face. Quickly opening the door, Vinyl lost her balance from leaning on the door with her ear against it, and with hooves flailing, she landed at my feet. Suppressing the urge to laugh, and keeping my expression as neutral as possible, I looked down at Vinyl. “Why Vinyl, what an unexpected surprise. All done at the club, I take it?” Octavia, however, was reduced to a fit of chortling. “Um, yeah…didn’t take as long as I thought,” Vinyl relied sheepishly. “So, um…how did the night go with you two?” I smiled at Octavia. “We had a very pleasant night. I believe Octavia has something to ask you when you two get home.” I helped Vinyl to her hooves. “She was just getting ready to leave, early rehearsal and all.” “Right, right…” Vinyl said, still slightly dazed from her tumble. “Come on, Tavi, let’s head home then.” “Yes, let’s.” Octavia walked up to me and smiled. “Thank you for a lovely evening, we must do this again soon.” “I’ll look forward to it,” I replied, giving her a little wink. She blushed and giggled. “Oh for buck’s sake, would you two just kiss already?” Vinyl exclaimed in frustration. We looked at each other and laughed, and I gave her a small kiss on the cheek. “Until next time, then.” Octavia and Vinyl walked outside together, as I waved from the front door. > Hello Darkness, My Old Friend > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 7. Hello Darkness, My Old Friend All in all, I must admit things have been going well since my arrival in Equestria. For the most part, the citizens of Ponyville have been accepting of the strange bipedal creature that lives among them, with his weird habits such as wearing clothes all the time, and having no real magic to speak of. I’m able to make enough bits to be comfortable, working as a general handyman and doing light repair work, freeing the general contractors to do larger, more complex jobs. With their assistance, and some helpful lessons from the Apples, I’ve even been able to attempt more complex repairs. The contractors know I’m not out to steal business away from them, and I even go as far as to recommend the proper contractor for more complex jobs requiring true professionals. From the night Vinyl tried to engineer a relationship between myself and Octavia Melody, a renowned cellist and lovely mare in her own right, we’ve developed a fast friendship over the weeks that followed. We’re not pushing things, oh no, we’re quite content to just let whatever happens, happen. So far, it’s been nothing overly romantic, just doing things together when our schedules allow it. Mine is a bit more flexible than hers, which gives me more time to plan for those times when her rehearsal schedule is free and clear. From nights seeing the latest shows to quiet nights of dinner and music at my house, we’ve been spending a great deal of time together, much to Vinyl’s delight, and she never wastes an opportunity to gloat over how perfect we are as a pair. So, it came as a shock to me when old feelings, those I thought I left behind in my old world, resurfaced after the first few outings with Octavia. I knew those feelings well. Feelings of inadequacy, feeling old, stupid, worthless…and the inevitable bouts of irrational sadness that accompany them. I tried to think of what might have triggered their resurgence. Was I not sleeping enough? Had somepony slighted me in such a way as to question my true worth to the citizens of Ponyville? Were the royal sisters angry at me for something I did or said, whatever it might have been? Or, was it my deepening feelings for Octavia that were fueling my doubts, taunting me with questions about why such a lovely creature like her would want to waste time with an ugly mutant such as myself? One thing I was thankful for was that I could clear my schedule fairly quickly, so when the feelings began their full assault, I was able to place myself on ‘emergency call only’ and sequester myself at home until they passed. They always passed before, no reason to suspect they wouldn’t this time, right? Usually, some sad music would help me release my feelings and allow me to lift myself up out of the funk I was in. I resolved to maintain some semblance of a schedule for myself, rising at a certain hour each day, sleeping as much as I could at night, taking care of personal hygiene, doing the everyday tasks I needed to do. If I could still do those, then there was a hope I could get out of this. I was laying on my sofa, soft music playing, when I heard a knock on the door. I got up, made myself look halfway presentable despite the fact I hadn’t shaved, which wasn’t all that big of a deal in a land where every other creature has some form of fur growing on their face, but it did make me look scraggly, and opened the door. Of all the things I expected to see, the one thing I never would have expected was Octavia standing on my front step with a worried look on her face. “Hello, Miss Octavia, would you like to come in?” I asked as nonchalantly as I could. She looked at me carefully. “You look terrible. Are you okay, do you feel well?” she asked, reaching a hoof up to check my temperature. “You’re not coming down with anything, are you? I heard there was an outbreak of pony pox going around…” I shook my head. “I’m fine, at least physically. And, from what the doctors around here tell me, I should be immune from pony pox just based on my physiology. Please, come in and I’ll try to explain what’s going on.” Octavia trotted into my house and took a seat on the sofa. I sat down next to her after opening the curtains a little bit to let more natural light in. “I was hoping I wouldn’t need to talk to you about this,” I sighed, “but since it’s come up…” She took note of my puffy eyes and seemingly run-down appearance. “Have you been crying?” “More like my eyes have developed spontaneous leaks,” I quipped, trying to defuse the tension in the room. “You see, back where I came from, I used to get these bouts of…well, sadness from time to time. Mostly I’d fret over something stressful in my life, or would suddenly and unexpectedly feel very down when things in reality were going just fine. I don’t know why it happens, and I never know when it’s going to start. I was hoping, that after moving here and being here for so long without having an episode, that it was finally going to leave me alone.” Octavia took in what I said. “I think I understand. It’s a mild form of depression, correct?” “Sort of. It’s also a collection of doubts that grows uncontrollably.” I took a deep breath. “And it seems that it’s manifested in our being together. Now, I’m not saying that we need to stop that, on the contrary. I don’t want us to go our separate ways, because I really am fond of you.” Octavia smiled a little. “And I of you. Please, continue. What are you doubting about us?” “It started as a doubt, but grew into a fear. At first, it was little questions, such as how you could even find something like me attractive, or worth being around…and it snowballed into a genuine fear that I’m gonna mess something up and make you hate me.” I hung my head. “I say with all honesty, the very last thing I would want to do, in this world or any other, is hurt you like that, and I know that we’ve been so happy being with each other for all of these weeks now…” I didn’t want to do this in front of her, but I couldn’t stem the tears no matter how hard I tried. “I don’t want to lose you, Tavi. As a friend or a possible romantic partner, if things progress to that point.” The next thing I remember feeling was a strong set of forelegs wrapping around me and pulling me tight against the softest fur I had ever felt. Nothing was said as I sat there and let my tears flow, and she stroked my hair and let me release all of my ears and doubts through the flood issuing from my eyes. “I’ve been worried, too,” she whispered after a few minutes had passed. “I was always afraid that maybe you wouldn’t want to be romantic with another species. Vinyl said it was all nonsense, but the worry remained. Seeing you now, like this…I have no worries that you could truly have affection for me, regardless of the fact that I’m a pony.” I lifted my head reluctantly from her soft chest fur. “That has nothing to do with how I feel about you. I find you a beautiful mare, but I also value your inner beauty. You have a lovely, engaging mind. You’re very intelligent, very talented, and a very easygoing type, which I happen to find quite desirable. I knew there was something about you I really liked when we first met, and I dare say it’s quite possible it could blossom into a full-blown case of love. All I ask is, as long as I’m being honest with you about how I feel, that you would do the same for me. Will you promise me that?” A set of lips met my cheek, and I was once again wrapped in a tight embrace. We held each other for I-have-no-idea how long, nor was I in a hurry to have it end. We eventually broke apart and Octavia smiled at me. “You smell minty,” she said. “Mouthwash. I had rinsed not long before you showed up.” I smacked my lips a few times. “Guess it’s a good thing I did. So, was that a ‘yes’ on your part?” She pulled me closer. “That’s a ‘definitely.’ It’s because I found myself a creature from another world that’s funny, smart, has decent taste in music and food, and makes me feel like a filly every time we’re together.” She booped me on the nose. “I’m gonna get rid of those fears and doubts about us, even if it takes me the rest of my life to do that.” I smiled and wrapped my arms around her tighter. “Challenge accepted,” I said, hugging her close. *~*~*~*~* The fire crackled and popped in the firepit behind my house. I sat outside, alone, Octavia having left hours ago. After our little affirmations with each other, we went out for a lovely lunch and spent the day just enjoying each other’s company. She informed me that Vinyl would be dropping by tomorrow with some recording equipment to retrieve those songs and some others she wanted to use for her shows. Since Vinyl was working tonight, I was told not to expect her until mid-afternoon at the earliest. And so, here I sat, reflecting on the events of the day and pondering the future ahead. The soft flapping of wings and a gentle thump behind me announced my usual nocturnal visitor on nights when I had the fire going. Luna sat down on the cushions next to me, and poured herself a glass of iced tea using her magic. “So,” she inquired, “is't true what I’ve been hearing this evening?” “I don’t know,” I answered innocently. “What have you been hearing?” “That a certain human and a certain musician in a certain sleepy little town are becoming quite the item.” Luna smirked. “If 't be true, then I off'r congratulations to thee.” I smirked. “I don’t know if I can use the word item right now, but we are seeing quite a bit of each other. We’re just taking it one step at a time.” “It pleases me that thou hast found a companion. Mine own sister and I were worried that thou wouldst be rather lonely whilst thou were here.” Luna sipped her tea and stared into the fire. I did the same, pondering a question that had been stuck inside my head for a few days now. “How did you do it?” I asked. Luna looked puzzled. “Do what?” “I read stories about your isolation and eventual return to Equestria, and I was curious how you made the transition from being alone in the world to having lots of others that care about you. I’m still having a tough time getting used to all of the attention, and it’s hard to tell which ones are sincere and which are only after something for their own gain.” Luna sighed, and took a large drink. “I appreciate thou calling it ‘isolation,’ but make no mistake, ‘twas a punishment. I harbor no illusions about it. Being in a position of power made things more difficult, with those only wishing to claim my friendship to gain favor with my sister. Or, those wishing to further their own power by being close to me. T’wasn’t easy at first to sort out those from the rest that truly called themselves friends, but I did learn one important thing. True friends only worry about one thing. They worry about thee, how thou art feeling, and if they can help in any way should troubles arise. They don’t seek personal gain, or glory, or fortune from thee. I consider thee a friend in that regard, and I hope thou dost consider me a friend of thine as well.” I nodded, a grin on my face. “I do, Luna. You’ve always been a big help to me, as has your sister, and I don’t know if I can ever repay that debt, but I will be more than willing to assist you should you need my help.” “I am very pleased to hear that,” Luna said happily. “Now, dost thou consider Miss Melody a friend also?” “I do, very much,” I answered. “In time, I am hopeful that I can even call her something more.” > A Day in the Life > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 8. A Day in the Life The first rays of the rising sun greet my eyes before the shrill beeping of my alarm clock brings me further into consciousness. Time to begin another day in Ponyville. Getting out of bed, I make my way to the shower. The water helps wake me up more, and now that I’m cleaner, I rub my whiskers and contemplate a shave. It has been a while, and I do have an important bit of business this morning, so perhaps a clean-shaven appearance would be the best thing. I manage to scrape the whiskers off and apply a bit of after-shave lotion after toweling off. I get dressed, putting on my usual work outfit of jeans and a T-shirt, comb my hair, and head downstairs for a quick breakfast. I’ve never been a big fan of oatmeal, so I was glad that eggs are sold here for consumption. It also helps a little with getting the necessary proteins I need without eating meat. Oh, I can still obtain it, usually from sources that sell to griffons. Doing that gets expensive due to import fees, however, and I haven’t had that level of craving yet, so I think I’ll be fine with some eggs in the morning. Two eggs and some toast with jam later, and I return upstairs to brush my teeth and head out for my first stop of the morning. *~*~*~*~* “Oh! This is a pleasant surprise, darling!” Rarity chirped when I entered the Carousel Boutique. “It seems the only time I see you is to repair something. I mean, it’s not like you stop by regularly to buy clothing or anything like that…” She gave me a pointed look. I raised my hands in surrender. “Okay, guilty as charged. It’s just that I haven’t been here all that long, and most of my clothes are still in decent condition. However, I do find myself in need of a tuxedo for the Gala, and I was wondering if you could fit me in your schedule.” Her expression as one of shock. “You mean you’ve changed your mind? Last I heard from Twilight, you were dead-set on avoiding the Gala at all costs.” “My situation has changed a bit since then,” I said, rubbing the back of my neck. “It appears I now have a very compelling reason to attend the Gala, despite my misgivings.” Rarity gave me a sly look. “Would it have anything to do with the cellist I’ve seen you around town with lately?” She grinned like she knew she had me trapped in regard to my answer. “It might,” I mused, “or it might be because a plea from your dear princess has moved me so that I could not bear to break the poor dear’s heart.” I affected a dramatic pose. “Lo, her entreaties have broached my soul and touched my heart, that I could only relent and summon every ounce of my courage to brave the slings and arrows of the ill-informed bourgeoisie to honor the request of my sovereign.” Rarity giggled and lightly clapped her hooves. “Well done, darling. You should really try out for the Ponyville Theatre some day.” I gave a theatrical bow. “Your praise honors me, dear lady. Now, is it too late to get a tux started for the Gala? I know how busy it must be for you this time of year.” “Not at all. All I’ll need to do is get some measurements and we’ll have you looking dapper in no time at all.” Rarity produced a tape measure and began measuring just about every part of me. “I do think it’s very sweet of you to fore-go your misgivings about the Gala for Octavia, quite gentlecoltly of you.” I shrugged. “It wouldn’t be right not to attend, and at the very least I now have an excuse to hang around the bandstand all night long and avoid the hoitiest of the toity.” Rarity’s tape measure rewound itself with a flick of her magic. “All done! And, since Octavia has already been in for her dress, I can coordinate the two of you so you’ll both look simply dashing!” I smiled. “I would expect nothing less from the premier seamstress of perhaps all of Equestria,” I remarked. Rarity giggled and blushed. “Now, there is the little matter of what this will cost…” “For all of the work you’ve done for me, I will give you a very generous discount,” Rarity assured me. “I promise I will not break your bank account.” “Wonderful. Payment now or when it’s ready?” “When it’s ready, and for you, no down payment required.” I bowed. “You are too kind, madame. Send word when it’s ready and I’ll come settle up then. I must get back to my shop, I have a few things to work on today. You know how it is.” Rarity sighed and nodded. “Indeed I do, especially once Gala season approaches. Ta-ta for now!” *~*~*~*~* Usually, when a pony drops an item off at my workshop, there’s no real timetable to getting it done. I can take all of the time I need to make sure I do a quality job, including testing and making sure that everything is ready to go. And as is only fair, I only bill for the actual time I work on the item, which in most cases runs under an hour for simple jobs, and sometimes up to two for more complex fixes. This job, however, was the exception to the rule. A couple of days ago I was visited by a unicorn stallion in desperate straits, almost to the verge of tears. He had bought this gift for his little filly, but quickly realized he was in over his head when it came time for the assembly, and no amount of magic was going to be able to help him, no matter what he tried. He came to me and practically begged me to please, please, please assemble this scooter for his little filly, whose birthday was coming up quickly and he didn’t want to disappoint her, oh pleeeeeeeeeeeease would I help him? I looked at the scooter, and it wasn’t that complex a job for me, but then I knew how to rig the brakes and set up the safety equipment. I agreed, earning the most profuse thanks I had ever received before, and he left me to the task. It turned out the rigging was more complex than I had originally estimated, and so it took me a little longer to get things ready. And so it was that I had about forty-five minutes to finish the work, my trip to Rarity’s taking longer than I had anticipated. I worked quickly, double-checking each bolt was in place and fastened securely; the brakes were rigged properly and worked as they should; and all of the safety guards were installed and no pieces were left over or missing. I was cleaning it up when he returned with his daughter in tow. Her eyes lit up when she saw the scooter. I swear, that filly darn near hugged that poor stallion’s eyeballs out of his head. We brought it outside and I showed her how everything worked, and suggested she ride it around by the shop to make sure everything was working okay, and if something needed tweaking, I could do it on the spot. She readily agreed, and soon she was speeding around like a pro, saying everything seemed fine. I gave it one last look, checking the bolts and screws, and agreed that it was good to go. The stallion was so happy, he even gave me some extra for the fine and speedy job I did. I thanked him, and he and his daughter went on their way. I may be a cynical old human, but jobs like that, and seeing the look of joy on that filly’s face, make me feel pretty good inside. *~*~*~*~* I was getting ready to close for lunch when a familiar pony approached the shop. It was Longhaul, no doubt out making deliveries around town today. I looked at the wagon he was pulling. Smaller than the one he used to haul my stuff through the portal, this one had a pronounced lean on the left side. I recognized that from my days driving truck. I figured lunch could wait. I could always take lunch after I worked on this. I knew the boss and he was pretty lenient about things like that. “Hey Longhaul,” I said as he approached. “Lose a leaf spring, did ya?” He nodded. “Hit a rock coming around a tight corner and heard something snap, looked back and saw this,” he replied, nodding toward the wagon. “Any chance you can get it fixed up?” I looked underneath. Sure enough, the connector had snapped, and the spring was hanging loose. I counted the metal leaves. “I’ve got some spare parts I salvaged from one of the Apples’ old wagons. Might be good to get you back to the yard so they can put a proper one on. You done for the day?” “Yup,” Longhaul affirmed. “I sent word back to the terminal telling them what happened and where I was going, so I should be clear for the day.” He looked down the road. “Oh, here’s my terminal manager now.” An earth pony with a brown coat and darker brown mane and tail, both with streaks of grey, approached. “Hi there, name’s Hoss Carter, I run the Ponyville freight yard. You gonna be able to get him back running again?” he asked, indicating Longhaul. “Well, I can get him back to the yard, so your mechanic can put the proper spring on,” I answered. “I used to be a trucker myself, and I remember how strict our inspectors were about making proper repairs. I can only imagine it’s the same here.” “Guess our worlds ain’t that much different after all,” Hoss said with a chuckle. “Can you tell me what it’s gonna cost, and will you accept a P.O. with payment next week?” I nodded. “Sure. Give me the purchase order number and I’ll put it on the invoice.” Hoss gave me the details, and Longhaul limped the wagon behind the workshop. One thing I knew from experience was that leaf springs weren’t simple fixes. I was lucky to have been able to disassemble one from an old wagon the Apples were disposing of, and so I was able to use that knowledge to take the old one off and get the new one back on fairly quickly. I presented the invoice to Hoss, along with a paper that stated the repairs were only temporary, no freight was to be hauled in that wagon until properly repaired, and if they chose to ignore that I wasn’t responsible for whatever happened. Hoss signed the paper and looked at the invoice. “That’s pretty reasonable,” he said, grinning. “How’d you like to be our new permanent mechanic?” I shook my head. “Nah, I’m happy being a general handyman. Tell you what, I’d be willing to do emergency repairs for you, if you don’t have anypony doing that now. All I need are the specs on the wagons you use so I can get the proper parts.” “I’ll get you that info and send it along with the check.” Hoss extended a hoof, which I bumped with my fist. “’Preciate ya, sir. And thanks again.” “Glad to help. Take care Hoss, you too Longhaul,” I said as the two of them headed back toward the freight yard. *~*~*~*~* I had to forgo my planned sit-down leisurely lunch for a quickie take-out meal from the local burger joint. I’d never been a big fan of veggie burgers back home, but here, there was something definitely different about them. It would figure that a primarily vegetarian population would have the know-how to make a decent veggie burger. It didn’t hurt that the horseshoe-shaped fries were cute as well as tasty. I had barely returned to the workshop and managed to get a few bites of food down when Lyra burst in, mane askew and breathing heavily from running. “Quick! Bon Bon — trouble at the shop — sink — water — HURRY!!!” Just as soon as she finished saying all of that, she ran off again. Sighing, I wrapped my lunch and set it in the refrigerator, then gathered what I figured I would need for a sink emergency. Collecting my plumbing tools, a large bucket, and an assortment of pipes, traps, and fittings, I was soon on my way to Bon Bon’s sweet shop. Bon Bon was waiting at the kitchen door when I arrived. She appeared a little damp. “Hi Bonnie, I hear you have some form of apocalyptic event that threatens the very existence of Ponyville, if Lyra’s reaction is anything to go by.” Bon Bon giggled. “Nothing that serious, just the main sink is backing up. I tried plunging it but it just blows the air back out at me…along with some of the water in the sink. I knew I couldn’t fix it so I had Lyra get you.” I grabbed the bucket and toolbox. “Okay, let’s take a look.” If you’ve ever looked at the drain pipes under your sink, you may have wondered why there’s a curved one in between the sink and the main drain pipe. What that pipe does is hold a small amount of water to prevent sewer gases from traveling up the pipe and entering your home. It also tends to trap a lot of small objects, eventually blocking the pipe completely. Usually, a good plunging or a dose of caustic drain cleaner will clear that issue right up. I removed the connector from one end of the trap, and after positioning the bucket to catch any water in the pipes, removed the other connector. To my great surprise, nothing started to flow once this connector was released. I pulled on the pipe. It begrudgingly gave way, revealing a solid core of …something. It was pinkish in color, with multiple other colors mixed through it. Curious, I poked this cylindrical mass and was able to chip off a small piece. I gave it a quick sniff. “Think I found the problem, Bonnie,” I said. “Seems somepony dumped a small batch of taffy down the drain, and it solidified here just above the trap. I’ll need to replace the pipe between the sink and the trap.” Bon Bon peeked under the sink and saw the column of taffy. “I think I know who did that,” she said, “and it seems I have to yet again discuss proper disposal techniques. How soon can you fix this?” “I’ve got the parts, shouldn’t take more than a half hour, maybe fifteen minutes at the earliest,” I replied. Bon Bon seemed relieved. “Good, at least I’ll still be able to finish cleaning up and not have to let everything sit overnight.” I cleaned out the trap and removed the now-worthless pipe, and after measuring it, took an identical length from the assortment I had brought with me. Sure enough, about twenty minutes later, Bon Bon’s sink was back in service once again. “I don’t suppose I could pay you in trade? Maybe some nice sweets for your sweetie?” Bon Bon asked, looking at the bill I presented her. “I wouldn’t object to that, but the plumbing supply place has this funny rule about wanting money for the parts I buy, regardless of how tasty the candy I present to them is. I will, however, buy a box of sweets from you and you can deduct the cost of that from the total.” I chuckled. “I love how word spreads so fast in these smaller towns. How did you hear about me and Octavia?” Bon Bon smirked. “A mare knows, from seeing how much of a spring she had in her step, her more radiant smile, her more cheerful attitude…I knew she was seeing somepony, but it wasn’t until I heard from a few other sources that it was you.” “I was more surprised to see word made it all the way to Canterlot, given that even Princess Luna knew about it,” I observed. Bon Bon laughed. “Octavia probably had a good dream about you one night, that’s how Luna would have found out. Let me get those candies and the bits from the till, I’ll be right back.” She walked out to the sales floor. *~*~*~*~* The sun was beginning to set when I finally made my way back home. Another emergency call, this time to replace a broken window at City Hall, kept me out of the shop for the rest of the afternoon. I was glad the glass place was still open so I could get the supplies I needed. Apparently, a friendly request from Mayor Mare was all it took for a little overtime on their part. I parked my bicycle by the shop and unloaded my tools. Securing everything, I walked through the connector to the main house and went straight upstairs. Stripping off my clothes and throwing them in the hamper, I once again plodded to the shower to wash away the day’s grime and dirt. Funny how a shower can be invigorating at one point in the day, and completely draining later on. I toweled off, threw on some shorts and a bathrobe, and went downstairs to reheat my lunch from earlier. I was too tired to cook anything elaborate, and I figured it would taste just as good now as it did earlier. I took a good look at the comfy sofa and decided dinner could wait. I flumped down face-first, letting the cushions absorb me as much as they could. I was dimly aware of my front door opening and hoofsteps approaching me. I recognized the perfume right away. Only Octavia wore that particular scent. “Rough day today?” she asked. “We’re sorry, the person you are trying to reach is no longer in service,” I replied, my voice muffled by the sofa cushion. “Please try your call again later. This is a recording.” I heard a giggle, and felt a set of hooves start massaging my back through my robe. I sighed happily. “Oh, that feels so good after the day I had today,” I said dreamily. “Oh, and before I forget, there’s a present for you on the kitchen table.” “For me?” she said, stopping the massage and walking to the kitchen. I heard her squee with happiness upon seeing the box. “My favorites! When did you get these?” “I was at the candy shop earlier, and picked them up after I finished the job I was doing there.” I smiled, knowing Bon Bon had filled the box with Octavia’s favorite treats. Which was good, because I really didn’t know what they were yet, and now I had a list to go by for future purchases. I reluctantly rose to a sitting position. “How was your day?” “It went well. We have the scores for two of the pieces that we picked out, and we began rehearsing them today. The more orchestrated piece is being transcribed and will take longer to rehearse, as I figured it would.” She popped a candy in her mouth and joined me on the sofa, giving me a chocolate-flavored kiss on the cheek. “What were your dinner plans?” she asked. “I have a burger and fries in the fridge I was gonna reheat, that’s about all I can manage right now.” “It’s still early enough, I could run out and get us some take-out,” Octavia suggested. “What do you have in mind? Neighponese?” I asked. She nodded. “It’s the quickest and closest.” I pointed to the bag of bits on the table. “I’ll buy, you fly.” She looked confused. “Fly? I’m not a pegasus.” I smiled. “Figure of speech from my world. Means I’ll pay for the food if you’ll go get it. Miso soup and tempura veggies for me, along with a veggie roll. Don’t be afraid to get whatever you want or how much it costs.” She grinned and kissed my cheek again. “I’ll try not to be too long,” she said softly, getting off the sofa and grabbing the bag of bits. She walked to the door, and gave me a smile before stepping out into the approaching night. I sat back and reflected on the day. Tired though I was, I felt good having done a full day’s work, helping a few ponies along the way, and knowing there was somepony that wanted to just enjoy my company for a little while made it all the better. I lightly dozed while I waited for Octavia to return, wondering what adventures tomorrow would bring. > The Long and Winding Road > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- 9. The Long and Winding Road The days passed into weeks, and weeks into months. I always remembered the change of seasons as being somewhat disorderly, with blazing hot weather possible well into the middle of autumn, and the threat of heavy snow going through into late spring in certain parts of the country. There were even years that appeared to skip a season entirely, moving from one extreme to another with no in-between or transition period. It did make things tough to plan, and could even manage to catch one unawares and unprepared. Not so in Equestria. Autumn came with the Running of the Leaves, an event held once all of the leaves were at peak color. Acres of leaves fell at once under the thunder of hoofbeats, denuding the trees in a matter of a few hours. Where this was when I had to rake what seemed like entire forests of leaves, which chose to fall at irregular intervals, is beyond me. At least with this event, all of the leaves fall at just about the same time, making for easy cleanup. Nightmare Night followed not long afterward, and the similarities between this and Halloween were almost too much to be considered coincidence. Although there was a slight element of scariness, the entire event felt more like a harvest festival with the entire town participating. Despite my usual aversion to crowded places, I had a good time, and even got to meet a few more ponies that I had yet to be introduced to, Ponyville being much larger than it appears to the average observer. Hearthswarming time proved to be a bittersweet period in my stay. Between an increase in my workload due to frazzled parents seeking to have their offspring’s toys assembled before the big day, and have it done properly, and Octavia’s increased practice schedule for the holiday concert and play, we barely got to see each other. During one of the rare moments when our schedules both cleared out, we sat down and discussed where our relationship was heading. At times emotional, but mostly rational and collected in nature, we both agreed to maintain friendship, but put any romantic notions on hold. Vinyl, however, took it far worse, making as many hare-brained schemes to get us back together as she could muster. It took both of us sitting down with her and explaining that, for the time being, it was best to wait and be friends rather than rush into something headlong and ruin everything. Once she saw it that way, she relented a bit and let us have our space. The winter gave way to spring. It’s nice that it wraps up so orderly and complete, but I could do without having to hear that dang song over and over again. This was a day for all of the ponies to learn to work as one, it was explained to me, and I took advantage of that by declaring a day of prolonged sleeping-in and general laziness. A good day was had by all, especially me. Hearts and Hooves Day passed with little fanfare for me. Octavia and I gave each other small gifts, and we were able to cement the fact that friendship, not romance, was more the way to go for us. I admit, it hurt being alone, but having at least a few friends that came around and spent time to ease my loneliness took most of the pain away. It’s hard to believe that it’s been close to a year since I gave up a life I knew for a complete re-start in another universe. In that short amount of time, I settled into a new life in a new world, made some new friends, and rebuilt myself to a level I doubt I could have ever achieved back home. It was a trade-up, as far as I was concerned, and something I could be proud of as I looked back. *~*~*~*~* The soft rustling of leaves could be heard as a warm breeze moved through the trees on another beautiful late-spring evening. I had a small fire burning in the pit behind my house, and was sitting in a comfortable chair, sipping a tall glass of sweet tea. Stars twinkled above and the moon made its silent trip across the night sky. It felt good to renew my old habit on nights like this. Winter forced an end to such activities, even though winters here were milder than most winters I had encountered back in the other world. Being able to sit, and simply gaze into the fire, and let most of the troubles in my mind go was an added bonus. A soft thump on the ground behind me, along with the ruffling of long wings, announced my usual nocturnal visitor. “Good evening, Luna,” I called out, “nice of you to stop by. How are things going?” “And a valorous evening to thee, my friend. ‘Tis good to be in thy company again. May we join thee for a while?” Luna asked, approaching slowly. “Of course, you’re always welcome here. Please, sit and have a drink.” Luna made herself comfortable on a pile of cushions I had set out for any pony guests that wished to join me. A small effort in hospitality, granted, which might have been fine had anypony wished to join me. Luna was my usual regular, and at time, only, visitor. She used her magic to pour herself a glass of tea and took a deep drink. Smiling, she said, “Thy tea-crafting art hast not faded, my friend.” Turning to me with a serious expression, she said with concern, “We had meant to check on thee ev’r since thy breakup with the cellist. Pray, how art thou holding up?” Sighing, I took a drink and stared into the fire. “I’d be lying if I said I was doing well, at least at first. Despite everything, it hit me pretty hard. We remain friends, but for about a month it hurt to even see her on the street. Over time, I was able to let things go and accept the fact that it just wasn’t meant to be. We talk now and again. I admit, it was a shock to hear she was looking into dating somepony else, but … I still wished her well, and I do hope she finds somepony she truly loves.” “And what of thee, my lief? Is there anypony that has caught thy eye?” Luna quizzed. “I haven’t really been looking,” I admitted. “Truth is, I’m getting too old for the dating scene. I think the only one even close to my age would be the mayor, and she doesn’t seem to be looking to start a fling anytime soon.” Luna scoffed. “Thou dost not appear that old to me. We believe t’would be a benefit to a fair one to be thy consort.” “I’m glad you do, you seem to be the only one.” I stirred the fire a bit and added another log, After sitting in silence for a short while, the quiet occasionally broken by the gentle sounds of tea being sipped, Luna turned back to me. “Pray, why didst thou apply to come to Equestria in the first place?” Taking a long pull from my glass, I thought a bit before I answered. “I suppose I could give the trite answers — I saw it as a challenge, it would be a new adventure, I was looking for a fresh start … truth be told, I did so because I had absolutely nothing to lose.” “And, how didst thou come to that conclusion?” Luna asked, intrigued. “Simple,” I explained. “At the time, I had reached a point of relative stagnation in my life. I lived alone, no family or friends, working a dead-end job that I figured I’d die in because I couldn’t afford to ever retire. Then, along came the whole portals thing and when I saw you were accepting applications from single people as well as families, I figured I could at least give it a try. You could have either said yes, in which case I had a chance to better myself in a new land, or you could have said no, and my life would have continued on as it was. No matter the option, I knew I’d be okay either way.” Luna pondered this, and nodded. “Thy reasoning is sound. And thou was not seeking fame, or glory, for thy actions?” I shook my head. “Nope. Just wanted to see what would happen.” Luna smiled. “It doth seem the outcome was favorable to thee. Pray, now that thou has lived amongst us for some time now, dost thou have any regrets about coming here?” Luna’s question rolled around in my mind for a short while as I reflected on the time I spent in this new and strange land. All of my experiences, good and bad, flooded my memories. Eventually, after some deep contemplation, I arrived at Luna’s unasked question: if I had to do it all over again, would I have? A smile crossed my face when I turned back to Luna. “No. I have no regrets about coming here and I doubt I ever will. I’ve resigned myself to living day by day, and accepting whatever happens. And, most surprising to myself most of all, I’m fine with that.” “We are most pleased to hear that,” Luna responded, a smile on her face. She stood up and fluffed her wings. “We must attend to our nightly duties, but before we part, we were tasked to ask thee if thou would join us at the castle three weeks hence. Our sister is planning a feast to mark the first anniversary of the program, and wishes the remaining humans to attend.” “Sure, I can be there,” I replied. “I’ll be sure to keep my calendar clear that week, and might make a vacation out of it.” I stood up and stretched. “And thanks again for stopping by, it’s always good to see you.” Wrapped in a feathery embrace, Luna pulled me closer. “’Tis always a pleasure to sit with thee, my friend. We shall see thee anon.” She broke the embrace and, with a few mighty flaps, flew off into the night sky. Returning to my seat after putting another log on the fire, I refilled my glass and settled back to look at the night sky once again. Yes, there was no denying things were different here. Apart from the inhabitants, the sky was different. The stars formed constellations completely foreign to me. The sun and moon were controlled by magical power rather than some force in the cosmos. Life in general moved at a different pace, a different vibe. A vibe I was slowly tuning in to with each day I spent here. I reflected on past moves in my life. Visits to places I used to live after having been away for so long didn’t have the same feel of familiarity, progress inevitably writing its changes upon the things I once knew, making me the outsider instead of a native son. It only reinforced the fact that time moves on, and your memories and experiences remain stagnant. It was best to move along and not dwell on what once was. I took a long sip of tea and stared back up at the sky. Yes, time is moving along at its own pace, and the world I once knew is moving and changing without me. I suspect it will be completely unknown to me in a few years, and even more surprising, it didn’t matter much right now. I was moving with this new world, shaping new experiences and new possibilities, growing and changing along with it. And, deep down, that’s exactly what I hoped would happen. The pitch of this world resonates through me now. This is, I was finally able to say without hesitation, my home. *~END~*