Hunger Pains (and other tales)

by Quillfeather882

First published

Being hungry can be...deadly...and other stories!

A cupcakes parody story and other tales from the magical land of equestria!

Hunger Pains

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Rainbow Dash struggled against the bonds that held her, realizing that she couldn't get free under her own power. The room she was in was dark, and she couldn't see more than a foot in front of her. It was silent as the grave; the only sound she heard was the blood pumping through her veins.

Just then, a high pitched giggle filled the room, the sound even more chilling than the table she was strapped to.

“P-pinkie? Is that you?” Rainbow asked, her voice quavering in barely repressed fright. “If...if this is a prank, Pinkie, it's not funny.”

Pinkie pie continued, the sound of her giggles reverberating off the walls. “It's finally your turn, Dashie! I didn't think your number would come up, but it did! We'll have so much fun together!”

As Pinkie finished speaking, Rainbow's demeanor quickly went from terrified to downright irritated. “Ugh, not this again. Pinkie, I swear to Celestia...I'm not in the mood for this.”

“Oh Dashie, don't you see? There's a system for these things, and you're it.” Pinkie hopped up and down, one eye twitching as she went over to a table of various tools and instruments, some medical, some not. “I've been doing this forever. I'll bet you'll be delicious.”

“Pinkie...” Rainbow growled. “Come on already.”

Pinkie Pie acted as though Rainbow had not said a word, and began selecting one of the instruments. “Hm...what do I do first?” She muttered. “Cutie marks? Maybe...wings? No...”

“Pinkie Pie!” Rainbow finally snapped. Pinkie turned back to the pegasus, her eye still twitching. “Yes Rainbow?” Pinkie said gleefully, blinking rapidly. With her mouth, Rainbow reached to her left, and withdrew a candy bar from what seemed to be thin air.

“Eat this.” She muttered around the candy's foil wrapper.

With a squeal of delight, Pinkie Pie accepted the treat, but then stopped, confused “But wait,” She spluttered, “Why would you give me chocolate? Not that I don't love chocolate of course. I love chocolate!”

Rainbow sighed and rolled her eyes, grinning.“Because you get a little murderous when you're hungry.”

Pinkie giggled, realizing what her friend meant. “Oh, right. Sorry.” Quick as a wink, Pinkie Pie snapped up the chocolate bar, wrapper and all, and contentedly licked her lips. As she did, her previously deflated mane and tail poofed up again. “Wow, I guess I shouldn't skip lunch. Thanks Dashie!”

Turning to leave, Pinkie hesitated, looking back at Rainbow when she didn't follow her toward the door. “Well, you coming or not Rainbow?”

Rainbow laughed. “I would, but I'm kinda stuck here until you let me out.” j

Pinkie chuckled. “Oh, right. Sorry again.” Bouncing back over to her Rainbow Dash, she quickly unfastened the bonds holding her down so she could get up.

“Wanna go prank some ponies now?” Rainbow said with a smirk. “I've got a giant woopie cushion with Applejack's name on it.”

Pinkie squealed in delight. “Yes, yes, yes! Let's go!”

With that, the two ponies walked outside into the sunlight, laughing about the pranks they would play on their friends, the dark and dank room behind them long forgotten.

Quill's Day at work

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Filthy Rich's store Barnyard bargains was absolutely dead today. Oh, sales were at an all time high, but every shop would have it's dead periods. No pony was more affected by these lulls in business than his employees. Hours would get cut, and the shifts would seem to drag on and on.

Quillfeather absentmindedly straightened up the jars of zap apple jam that were lined up on one of the back shelves. It felt as though she'd straightened up this particular section multiple times. "Ugh," She groaned, lightly bumping her forehead against the wall. "Where the hay is everypony today? It's Saturday! Everypony does their shopping on the weekends." She didn't really care to deal with the ponys that came in. Some were kind and sweet, like the yellow Pegasus that came in every week to buy vegetables. Others were...difficult. At this moment, though, Quill would have given anything, and I do mean anything, for even a difficult customer to trot through the front door. At least then she'd have something different to do.

Just as she was contemplating asking Mr. Rich if she could go home early, she heard the bell by the door open. A sigh of relief passed over her lips, as she walked over to the front of the shop. "Welcome to Barnyard Bargains!" She said brightly, rounding the corner. "Is there anything I can help you find today?"

The pony who had entered was a bright blue unicorn, wearing a star covered cape and pointed hat. The unicorn turned at the sound of Quillfeather's voice, giving her a pleasant smile back. "Oh yes. The great and powerful Trixie has need of many things!"

Quill waited patiently, expecting the pony to rattle off a list of things that she would be needing. But the pony only stared at her. 'And...what exactly is it you need?" Quill finally asked when the pony didn't respond. Looks like this one is going to be a difficult one. Great.

The unicorn put a hoof to her head, as if trying to remember. "Hm...some apple jam I think...yes! Definitely some apple jam!"

Quill smiled, nodding. "But of course! The apple jams are going to be over this way!" Leading the mare to the section she'd just been working in, she pointed a hoof at the zap apple jam. "All of our apple jams were made at Sweet Apple Acres, a farm that our company has been proud to do business with for many decades at this point! What sort of apple jam were you interested in?"

The pony put a hoof to her chin in thought again. "Hm...are you sure that one," She said, pointing at the rainbow striped jars of Zap apple jam, "Is actually an apple jam?"

Quill smiled. This was a question she got quite often from ponys who weren't from around here. "It is rather unusual isn't? That's zap apple jam."

The blue unicorn scoffed. "What apples are striped like rainbows? No apples I've ever seen. I'm certain you're making that up. There's no such thing as a Zap apple."

Quill was starting to struggle with holding her smile in place. "No ma'am. If you look right here on the label, that's what it contains."

The unicorn shook her head. "No, no, no, Trixie refuses to believe that such a thing exists."

Oh, sweet Celestia, not this again... Quill groaned internally. Now, more than anything, she just wanted this pony to leave.

The pony continued to rave and rant about how it was impossible for an apple to be any other color but red or green, and then decided to say the words that every retail worker absolutely hated to hear, "Trixie would like to speak to your manager."

Keeping her smile plastered on her face, she nodded, and turned to walk toward Mr. Rich's office. Mr. Rich was generally a good natured stallion, and was easy to talk to. Raising a hoof, she knocked.

"Yes?" Mr. Rich called from inside.

"Mr. Rich, sir, I have a customer who would like to speak to you. I'm not sure why."

The sound of a chair scrapping against the floor reached her ears, and then her boss opened the door and stepped out. His hair was neatly slicked back, his tie perfectly straight.

"Where is the pony, dear?" He asked.

"She's over here in the apple butter section, sir."

The pair trotted over to the aisle, only to find that Trixie wasn't there.

"Well, she was here." Quill stated, sighing.

Mr. Rich chuckled. "Not to worry, Quillfeather. This happens a lot, as I'm sure you know. Why don't you trot on home dear? Take the rest of the day off. I'll see you tomorrow at 1 pm."

Quill beamed. "Thank you sir!" Quickly, she removed her apron with her magic and trotted to the locker room to get her things. Maybe this wouldn't be such a bad day after all.