Diplomacy and Boredom lead to Pone-droid Purchases.
“And the blah blah of blah wished to blah blah blah...”
Twilight let the noblestallion drone on and on and on, knowing full well that Celestia was listening. She had to, she was the one the noble was talking with. Or at least at. She couldn’t be sure but it didn’t look like Celestia was really listening. More like she was politely paying attention to please the nobles.
They’d been at this summit for nearly two hours already. Twilight had other plans. Plans involving a good book, her favorite toy, and a locked door. A yawn escaped her and she barely managed to cover her face with a wing. The noble continued to drone on and Luna leaned over to her subordinate royal. “You may abscond if you wish.” She whispered and Twilight looked at the other princess. “You can go. He’s going to drone on for a few more hours, Celestia will say some words to placate him, and he’ll leave. There is no longer a need for all three of us to be here.”
Twilight looked at her the nodded, made some excuse to leave, and teleported out. In her exhausted state, she found herself in a part of Canterlot she didn’t recognize. She knew the city had been built on the mountain side. She never actually knew it was built into the mountain side. Looking around, she realized why she’d never been here before. Mage Lights designed to look like mares dancing on poles lined the street. A shop window lit with a soft light illuminated mares and stallions in... compromising positions.
Twilight continued to walk through the street, however, now curious about this part of her old home town. A couple of times she was cat called by a stallion or two but she ignored them. Sounds coming from an alley way made her curious and she peeked down it only to quickly look away from the scene happening just down the alley. A door opened and a scent drifted out, drawing her towards it. It smelled amazing. A pair of ponies walked out of it and passed her on both sides.
Had Twilight paid attention, she’d have noticed that the mare of the group wasn’t exactly there. Her eyes were glazed over, completely black in fact, and she seemed to have seams where her legs would meet her shoulders or haunches. Walking into the shop, Twilight inhaled the scent and smiled. It was soothing. Not hypnotic in a dangerous sense, but it bade her venture in further. She didn’t pay any attention to the customers within the shop, nor what was being sold. She wanted to know what that smell was.
“Princess Twilight?” A voice asked and she looked up. The stallion in front of her was slightly taller than her. No, that’s not right. He was seated on a high stool. His coat was either a pale grey or a vibrant blue, it was hard to tell under the shop lights. His mane and tail were multi-colored, obviously dyed from the glow. Stripes of neon green, blue and purple met her gaze and she looked to his eyes. Also glowing, though not from the lights. He had glasses that were lined with small lights on. “What brings you to my shop?”
“I don’t know. I had to escape from the meeting and a smell drew me in here.” She said and his eyes went wide for a moment before calming.
“Ah, yes. I apologize. I burn incense in here to attract customers. Even with all of the stuff that goes on in other stores, nopony really wants to come in here even just to peruse.” He said and Twilight took a moment to look around. It quickly became obvious why, with all of the ponies standing on sales racks.
“You sell ponies?” She asked, her voice slightly loud in case there were any guards outside.
“No! No no, of course not Princess.” He said, his eyes wide again and on the defensive. “I would never sell live ponies.” He said as he stepped out from behind his counter. “Come, let me show you.” She stared at him through narrow eyes as he led her over to another pony on a display stand. The mare didn’t look at them, didn’t even bother to acknowledge their existence. When they reached her, he reached up and tapped her on the muzzle.
Twilight’s eyes went wide as the mare in front of her vanished in a shimmer, replaced instead with a pure white pony with seams on its sides, around its front and hind legs, at the base of the neck and in other places all over the body. “What is...?”
“Welcome to... uhm... Pondroid Emporium. I sell... life size animatronics of... ponies. Called Pondroids, they are self charging and self-cleaning. Their outer coats can get dirty but they are water tight, so bathing, swimming or other water based accidents such as splashes cannot harm the chasis inside.”
“I... see. And what do they do?”
“Almost anything Princess. Pondroids are programmed using a spell we include with every purchase. The programming can be redone or set to a selection of default options. For example... Pondroid, reorganize that shelf by alphabet and date of the issue’s release.” He said and the robotic pony’s eyes lit up, still white and pale, and she stepped off of her pedestal and walked over to the shelf. Twilight watched as the robotic pony used her hooves just as well as any other pony to reshelf the books alphabetically and by the date they released.
Once finished, the Pondroid stood back, turned around, and returned to her pedestal. “That was... actually impressive. I saw it and assumed you sold ponies as slaves. I apologize for that. As an apology, I would like three. Do they all come in this pale white?” she asked and the sales-stallion looked at her for a moment then shook his head.
“No no, of course not. I have a variety of shades, mane styles and even races to choose from. I need only use this book on my desk to give you your selection.” He said, smiling happily as he stepped behind his desk. “What would you like? You can change your Pondroid’s specs and schematics magically using the included book.”
“I want one to be a mare. Make her... an Alicorn, like myself. Her coat should be... a slightly darker shade than mine and her mane and tail are like mine but also with streaks of bright red. Oh, shorter though, and more... spikey? Like... uhm... DJ Pon-3.” She said and he nodded, his horn writing down the selections in the book that had been sitting closed on his desk, as well as the price for the custom model.
“A stallion for my second choice. Keep him white with a very light yellow mane and tail. Earth Pony.” He nodded again and wrote down her choice. “And the third... uhm... can you make one that’s... larger than the others?”
“How much larger?” the shop stallion asked and she looked around as if to make sure no one else was listening in before leaning forward.
“I want her to be big enough to swallow two ponies whole...” she whispered and he blinked at her before writing it down.
“It may take a couple of extra days of work, but yes, I can do that. Any specifications for how she should look?”
“Like... uhm... like Princess Celestia...” she said under her breath and he smiled.
“Well, if that’s the one you would like, you are in luck. I happen to have one in the back. A pony came in a couple months ago asking me to make one exactly like that and then asked if doing something to the Pondroid would do something to Celestia. They stormed out without their droid when I told them it wasn’t a voodoo doll.” He said and Twilight’s ears perked up a little.
“Do you happen to remember what the pony looked like?”
“Kinda bland coloring really. Dirt brown coat, sickly looking green mane and tail, and a cutie mark that looked like a beetle. Made me wonder if she kept beetles or somethin’.” He said and Twilight nodded as she looked at the orders for her bots.
“How much do I owe you?”
“Well, Princess, you get a royal discount. Normally, one of my Pondroids runs one thousand bits for a basic model. Custom models can range from fifteen hundred bits to two thousand. As you are a princess and as such are one of the fine mares that let me run my establishment in the city, I am discounting both of your custom Pondroids down to five hundred bits a piece. The Celestia look-a-like you can have for free, since she’s already paid for.”
“When can I pick up my custom droids?” she asked as she summoned a small bag of bits, counting out one thousand bits for her order.
“I can have your custom droids ready by tomorrow and they can either deliver themselves to you or you can come and get them.” he said and she looked at the bits to make sure she was right as he also counted them out.
“I can come get them. One... other question... the Alicorn model I ordered and this Celestia model... can they use magic?” she asked and he walked around the counter after finishing counting out his pay, tapped the Celestia-droids’ side and a panel opened.
“These are a very special gemstone I order from the Pie Family Rock Farm. They are very pricey as it is difficult for them to find one, but they absorb magic and hold a charge for years, if not centuries. Especially when hooked up to a magic generator like the one it’s connected to, which has cords and a pipe leading up into the droid’s horn, producing magic. If you ask her to teleport something, or even do simple levitation, she can do it.”
“That’s actually excellent. Thank you very much.” She said and he nodded and waved as she teleported back to her room at the castle.
“Hello Twi...” a very familiar voice started only to stop as Twilight and her new droid arrived in the guest bedroom. She looked at the bed to see Celestia reclining there. “You were gone for quite some time, I thought I would come and check on you. I finished dealing with the delegates that came in and, when I didn’t find you here, I thought perhaps I could relax for a spell. And now you are here. With... me.” The monarch of the sun said as she stood up and approached her student and her robotic double.
“Princess Celestia... I can explain.”
“The height is a little off, she’s taller than me. The mane is good, though I do think a solid pink would do her better. That whirring is a tad annoying.” Twilight watched as her mentor circled the robot, her horn lighting and the mane and tail becoming a solid pink, much like Pinkie Pie’s coat. Her magic then moved to the wings and extended them. “Much better connection with the wings, the gears and joints are silent so there won’t be that problem.” Twilight would have asked what sort of problems but Celestia’s next move surprised her. Twilight blushed as her mentor lifted her robot doubles tail and looked underneath. “Well, somepony has too much time on their hooves. Or they have very good spies. This is... the first time I’ve seen my own marehood though, so this could be just what the creator thought I'd have.”
“Princess? Are you... mad at me for buying it?” Twilight asked and Celestia looked over at her. “Well. Uhm. Not... uh... not buying it. It was left because the pony who ordered it was unsatisfied with it and the shop owner gave it to me for free to get it out of his shop and I really should have gone back to Ponyville with it but I didn’t want to shock Spike or the girls and...” Twilight was stopped when Celestia put a hoof to her muzzle.
“I’m not mad. I’m rather impressed actually. The craftsmanship in the coat and the mane and tail. It appears to be breathing, so it has some form of general motorization.” Celestia said before walking back to the droid and pressing her ear against the chest. “And a smaller engine that seems to have a gemstone at its core.”
“The... shop owner called it a magi-tech engine.”
“Magi-tech. That’s rather ingenious, combining magic and technology.” Celestia said and Twilight watched as her mentor circled the droid one more time before walking to the door. “Enjoy your new android Twilight.” She said as she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.
Twilight stood still for a moment before flopping fully on the bed. “That... sucked.” She said, not even noticing as her new android walked over to its own charging pedestal, picked it up in a slightly pale yellow glow and placed it in a corner of the room before standing on it and shutting down to charge.