Broken Mirror

by KatonRyu

First published

Slowly, the magic faded out for the last time. Sunset sat slumped on her knees, staring through blurry eyes as the glow dissipated in the darkness. It was over. The portal was gone.

Slowly, the magic faded out for the last time. Sunset sat slumped on her knees, staring through blurry eyes as the glow dissipated in the darkness. It was over. The portal was gone. Equestria and the human world were safe…and forever separated from one another.

Broken

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Slowly, the magic faded out for the last time. Sunset sat slumped on her knees, staring through blurry eyes as the glow dissipated in the darkness. It was over. The portal was gone. Equestria and the human world were safe…and forever separated from one another.


When Sunset woke up the next morning, she didn’t really remember how she’d even gotten home. She supposed she’d just walked, after spending at least an hour staring morosely at the statue that had once hidden the portal to Equestria, but which was now back to being a regular statue. Her stomach felt like it was lined with lead, as did her arms and legs.

It had all been for the best. Everyone was safe. The universe wouldn’t end. And…and she’d never see Twilight again. Never be able to write her again.

She felt her vision going blurry again and resolutely blinked away the tears. No, dammit, she wasn’t going to spend the whole day as a weeping wreck, she just wasn’t.

She quickly threw off the covers and stood up, as if acting decisively would somehow allow her to outrun her emotions. At first, it actually seemed to work a bit. She managed to get through her shower just fine, and she even succeeded in making breakfast for herself. But for some reason, her orange juice and sandwiches became blurrier with every bite she took, and then she was sitting there, sobbing her eyes out.

It took her about ten minutes to calm down, and then ten more to finish her breakfast, by which time she was running late for school. She’d just thrown on her backpack when she suddenly just stopped. A lot had happened in a very short period of time. Was going to school really going to help her today? She’d see her friends, obviously, but that included this world’s Twilight. She grimaced. Given her current situation, human Twilight was the last person Sunset wanted to see right then. She very much doubted she’d be able to get through the day without crying so much she’d die of dehydration.

She put her backpack down again. This was going to be a sick day. Her friends would get by without her for a day, she was sure. She flopped herself down on the couch and turned the TV on. But instead of watching, her thoughts simply returned to everything that had happened over the past few days. Once more she felt her eyes burn. She didn’t bother fighting the tears this time.


It was raining. Not just raining, but a wild, vicious thunderstorm. A thunderstorm whipped up by the best weather ponies in Equestria, who had been ordered to do this by Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship herself.

Twilight stood on her crystal balcony, welcoming the feeling of being buffeted by the storm while lightning flashed around her and the thunder rolled across the sky. The wild weather certainly matched her anger and sadness, and she knew her horn was sparking as she stood motionless in the raging storm. She wryly thought that the Storm King, if he’d still been alive, would probably have enjoyed it.

But all the rain and natural violence in Equestria wasn’t enough to make Twilight feel any better. The mirror, so long displayed in her throne room, was shattered now, beyond even magical repair. Shattered by her own doing, her last-ditch effort to save both Equestria and the human world. The biggest Pyrrhic victory of her life.

A three-pronged bolt of lightning flashed in the sky, followed almost immediately by an earsplitting rumble. Twilight didn’t react. She’d loved thunderstorms ever since she was a small filly, and watching them had usually made her feel better whenever she felt a bit down. It was because of that she’d given the order that this storm be whipped up, and to Tartarus with the schedule. Everypony present had been so shocked to hear Twilight ‘let-me-make-a-schedule-for-the-scheduling’ Sparkle say to ignore the schedule that nopony had dared to argue.

Twilight had then retreated to the balcony to wallow in the storm. It had been hours since it began, but still she wasn’t satisfied. The weather Pegasi had instructions only to calm the storm when she gave the signal, and not a moment before. Another flash, another echoing boom that rolled across the sky. Twilight could even feel the force of it in her body. She looked up at the sky and let her tears mix with the rain.

Pieces

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The phone buzzed. Sunset made no attempt to grab it. She continued to stare at the ceiling. Could she have done anything else? Had there been any other way to save everything? A way that wouldn’t have involved losing…her? To Sunset’s shame, she found it difficult to even think of the Princess’s name at that moment. For Celestia’s sake, it wasn’t like she was dead. It was just that…they’d never see or speak to each other again.

The phone kept buzzing. With an irritated groan, Sunset swiped the thing off the couch next to her and looked at the screen. Twilight Sparkle. She felt her throat tighten, her breath shorten. Of all her friends, it had to be the one sharing a name and appearance with the girl she loved. Just great. Should she answer? The two Twilights were nearly exactly the same. She could at least hear her voice this way… But no, that wouldn’t be fair. The human Twilight was her own person, unconnected to the Equestrian Twilight. She couldn’t use her closest human friend as a replacement for her girlfriend in any way, not even something like this. With a heavy heart, Sunset pressed the ‘reject’ button.


Twilight looked up at the dissipating clouds. Princess Celestia had ordered the weather ponies to end the storm and go back to their own shifts. Afterwards, she’d landed next to Twilight on the balcony, but after seeing the look in Twilight’s eyes she’d just nodded slowly and gone back to Canterlot. Twilight was grateful her mentor had decided to leave the lecture for a later date.

She knew that what she’d done was wrong, an abuse of her station, but she felt so much inner turmoil she needed this, more than she’d ever needed anything else…except for everything she couldn’t have now. The embrace of her girlfriend. Laughing together. Being close. Discussing magical theory. Making bets when Starlight and Trixie would finally hook up. It was gone, all of it. She should have known. Nothing ever lasts, after all. Princess Celestia had told her that so many times. But she hadn’t been prepared for this. She hadn’t thought that these happy days would be so few.

Star-crossed lovers. It used to be a phrase from her novels, nothing more. Now, she found herself applying it to herself and Sunset Shimmer. Of all the ponies in Equestria, and in this case beyond, she would have ever called star-crossed, she’d never have thought she’d ever be one of them.


Sunset was still on her couch. She hadn’t moved from it since deciding she was skipping school. The bright rays of the midday sun made it difficult to see the screen, but she wasn’t really watching anyway. It felt like a lifetime ago now, but this day resembled that other one quite a bit. Sunny weather, just a few clouds in the sky, gentle breeze. It had been as idyllic a day as it could possibly be in the city. Twilight had come over, like she’d been doing more and more often lately, and they’d hung out together, just the two of them. Nothing they hadn’t done before. They talked, laughed, played some games, and then, at the portal, when they were saying goodbye… Sunset closed her eyes, relishing the memory of the kiss.

It had been a surprise to both of them, and even now Sunset didn’t really know who had initiated it. All she knew was that she liked the feeling and that she wanted to do it again. At the time, she’d believed that she would get all the chances she could ever ask for.


The inside of the castle felt cold. It had only felt like that when Twilight was still getting used to it, still getting over the shock of the library’s destruction. Ever since then, it had become just as much of a home to her as the library or her room in Canterlot had ever been, but now the crystal walls seemed to exude a chill that went deeper than just the skin. Twilight knew that wasn’t really the case, but she couldn’t shake off the feeling no matter how hard she tried.

Not that long ago, she’d been here with Sunset, eagerly showing her the results of new research she was working on, or proudly telling her of all the lessons her students were learning at the school. At other times, she would talk about her anxiety of having to take over the guidance of Equestria once Princess Celestia and Princess Luna had retired, and Sunset would listen to her and calm her nerves. Twilight hadn’t been able to explain it then, but being with Sunset always felt different than being with anypony else. It hadn’t been until after their kiss that she realized what she felt.

Cracked

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From the corner of her eye, Sunset saw the screen of her phone light up for what must have been the tenth time that day. She turned it over and leaned back again. She knew she would have to talk to her friends sooner or later. They didn’t know what had happened. They knew about her and Twilight, of course, but they didn’t know about the portal. She figured they would find out soon enough, when their magic would fail to work now that it was cut off from its source. She knew she owed them all an explanation, but she just didn’t feel like it. Hardly the most mature thing of her to do, and she recognized it as the pettiness it was, but she felt entitled to act that way. If her friends knew what she had given up, surely they’d understand. Surely they would forgive her for being distant just this one day.


The books in Twilight’s library were still in disarray. To Twilight, they now looked like the aftermath of a battlefield. Hastily scrawled notes referencing tomes of varying degrees of usefulness were scattered all across the floor, and even in her most dedicated studying sprees, she didn’t think she ever had this many books open at the same time. She looked at the scene with jaded eyes, still hearing the frantic voices of herself and Sunset as they raced to find a way to stabilize the portal before it would tear open and consume both dimensions at once. They’d been so focused on that one thing that they’d never stopped to think about the consequences their actions would have.


Magic is powerful and volatile. It was one of the first lessons Sunset had ever learned as a student of Princess Celestia’s, and one of the main reasons she had been so interested in gaining more and more power. Using a force so versatile requires great skill and mental acuity, and Sunset had always prided herself on possessing those things in large quantities. So why was it, then, that these basic tenets were so easy to forget whenever Twilight was involved? She had known from the beginning that a portal between dimensions made use of magic far beyond her knowledge, and that overusing such a thing would likely have grave consequences.

At first, both she and Twilight had even decided not to cross too often, and to stick to using the journal for the majority of their interactions, but as time had gone on that good intention of theirs had fallen by the wayside more and more. It had just been so much fun. They were nearly equal in magical aptitude, but their differences in attitude, with Twilight being more theoretical and Sunset more practical, made them excellent complements to one another. At the same time, Sunset taught Twilight to be bit more relaxed in daily life, while Twilight helped Sunset get more organized so she could better apply her talents. Their friendship was mutually beneficial, and because of it, it was addicting.


It had started quite subtly. Occasionally, the journal Twilight and Sunset used to communicate between worlds seemed to distort the letters a bit. Neither had seen anything particularly strange about that at first, but then it began happening more often and more noticeable. Still, Twilight and Sunset figured it probably wasn’t anything serious. Now, Twilight wondered if they’d just been in denial. After all, Princess Celestia had been in a similar situation with Mirror Sombra.

It hadn’t been long before larger things began to go awry. Rainbow Dash suddenly had a scrape on her foreleg without having any clue as to why, which just so happened to match with a scrape human Rainbow Dash had on her elbow after an athletics misstep had sent her sprawling to the ground — an incident which had earned her the name Rainbow Crash in the human world for about a day before people got tired of it. Rarity had woken up with a sore back, on the same night human Rarity had attempted a project which was a bit too ambitious and had fallen asleep at her desk in a rather uncomfortable position. It was due to these things that Twilight and Sunset had finally begun to realize what was going on. Perhaps, Twilight reflected, if they’d made work of it right at that moment, everything that followed could have been averted.

Shards

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With her eyes closed, Sunset thought about the fine line between happiness and despair. For a few short weeks, Sunset’s life had been amazing. She had great friends, a place to live, and the best girlfriend she could ever hope for. Even the small glitches in the journal didn’t bother her too much. At worst, they were like specks of dirt on a car headlight. Impossible to see in the bright light. But things had escalated so fast, and she remembered running down the hallways of Twilight’s castle, panicked, because everything was going wrong.

Her trip through the portal, rather than being instantaneous, had taken nearly a full minute. During that minute, she kept seeing flashes of both Equestria and the human world, constantly shifting into a pony and then back into human again. The experience was seared into her mind, and she was sure that there was a large number of nightmares in store for her. But her uncomfortable journey had only been the start.


Twilight could still see the portals flickering in and out of existence around the mirror. She caught glimpses of CHS, which was fortunately deserted since the school day was long over. When Sunset emerged from the portal, shaken and disoriented, Twilight’s fears had been confirmed. The magic that was keeping the portal open had begun to destabilize, most likely because of their increasingly frequent crossings. She remembered the reason Sunset had come over that day. They would watch the meteor shower together. But when the portal began to fail, all thoughts of a quiet evening had been swept away. As soon as Sunset had recovered from the trip between dimensions, Twilight had dragged her into the library, looking for a way to mitigate the effects of the destabilization.


Sunset had never read so many books so quickly before. Even now, lying on her couch, she could see the countless theories and formulae dancing in front of her mind’s eye. They’d been so optimistic, at first. Even though she’d been on shaky legs due to her odd journey, and even though she’d been alarmed by this turn of events, she hadn’t for a moment thought that the situation couldn’t be solved. But as the evening wore on, each and every book they opened said the same thing: the portal had to be sealed off, or the barrier between the dimensions would fail catastrophically, resulting in the annihilation of both worlds. She’d refused to believe it. She still refused to believe it.


Researching magical theories with Sunset was like something out of a dream to Twilight. Sure, Starlight was just as gifted in magic as Sunset was, but as much as Twilight enjoyed her company, it still wasn’t the same as with Sunset. At any other time, she would have been perfectly happy. But now, once again, the fate of the world hung in the balance. And this time, it didn’t look like her books were going to bring her the kind of solution that could bring a happy end. And with every new book reiterating what the others had already said, Twilight had begun to think about the best way to tell Sunset this. Several times, she’d started to speak, only to fall silent again when she saw Sunset’s determined eyes. Her girlfriend wasn’t giving up. She couldn’t either. But try as she might, she could not see a solution.


Sunset had known from the way Twilight looked at her that their efforts would be fruitless. And every time she saw that forlorn look, it had renewed her vigor in trying to come up with anything at all. Myriad ideas had run through her mind, unorthodox ways of forcing magic into a stable form, of restoring the mirror to its normal form. But she knew, deep within, that it was useless. No miracle was going to happen this time. If their worlds were to be saved, the portal needed to close. It was Twilight who came up with the initial idea of destroying the mirror, but Sunset had been the first to realize that just destroying the mirror wasn’t going to be enough. The other side would remain open, unless…unless it was forced closed from there.


Twilight’s horn sparked. She felt her stomach churning when she thought back to the moment Sunset had told her she needed to go back. Everything in her wanted to shout at her not to do it, to stay in Equestria, her true home. But the student of magic she was at her core knew that Sunset was right. The only way of doing this right was this. Sunset would use her Equestrian magic to contain and constrict the portal. Twilight would then use her magic to break the mirror. Everypony, everyone, would be safe. And along with the mirror, she’d break her own heart. And she’d known that, just like the mirror, her heart would remain broken.

Her breathing grew heavy as she recalled the final moments. Her eyes never left Sunset’s, even when they kissed for the last time. She’d forced herself not to cry then, and Sunset had done the same, and, ever the resolute one of them, Sunset had turned around and stepped through the portal. Twilight had waited, seen the flickering portals again, bigger and more detailed now, and without a shadow of a doubt, she knew that what she was about to do was the only thing that could be done. When her journal vibrated at Sunset’s signal, she destroyed the mirror.

Mirror

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So many phone calls. Sunset was tired of them. Reliving the moment where she’d ponied up, grasping hold of her magic just one more time, and using it to hold shut the portal until Twilight had destroyed it, had given her resolve to get this over with as soon as she could. She called her friends, one by one, and told each of them in as even a voice as she could manage that she needed to talk to them. She saved Twilight for last.

When Twilight picked up the phone, and told her she’d been worried, Sunset broke down. She hung up and sent a text message apologizing, asking her to meet up with everyone else that night. Just like she expected, her friends showed up within an hour. There was no way they were going to wait for evening to come, not when their friend was so obviously distressed. When Sunset saw Twilight, she had to bite her tongue to prevent herself from breaking down in tears again. She tasted her own blood, but she didn’t care.

She took a few deep breaths to calm herself. Sunset wanted to look at her friends, but for some reason it felt like her gaze was magnetically drawn to particular piece of floor board. Fine. If that was how it had to be. With a dry throat, she began to talk.


Twilight sat in her throne. The remains of the mirror were still behind her, but she made every effort not to look at them every few seconds, lest she start crying again. She was anxiously awaiting the arrival of her friends. After going over everything that had happened once more had given her enough clarity to talk to her friends, or at least, that was what she hoped. Now, sitting so close to the monument of her own mistakes, she wasn’t so certain anymore.

But it was too late to back out. She’d asked Spike and Starlight to call everypony in. Normally, she would have done it herself, but she didn’t want to use magic right then, just like she hadn’t wanted to magically summon a thunderstorm before. When her friends entered the throne room, they were still having a conversation. When they saw Twilight, they instantly fell silent.

For a few moments, Twilight silently endured their questions, waiting for them to fall silent on their own. Eventually, they did. She could see their anxious faces. Her chest ached from the tension she was feeling, so she stood up and began pacing back and forth.

She could feel everypony’s eyes on her, but she remained quiet. Anger and sadness were battling for supremacy within her, but she didn’t want her friends to see either. She had to remain calm. Eventually, she stopped pacing. She looked at her friends and told them everything.


Evening had fallen again. Sunset was alone again. Her friends, predictably, had been shocked by what she had told them. That the portal was gone. That their magic was gone. That they wouldn’t see Princess Twilight ever again. By the end, all of them had been crying. Each and every one of them had offered to stay the night so Sunset didn’t have to be alone, but even though she appreciated the offer, being alone was what she needed right then. Talking to her friends had made her feel just a little bit better, but it hadn’t healed her pain. How could it? For all intents and purposes, she’d just lost her girlfriend. Not broken up, not dead…but lost just the same. And aside from that, her magic, her last remaining link to Equestria, was gone as well. She was stranded in this foreign world for the rest of her life.

It wasn’t in her nature to give up hope. Not really. But right now, she felt just about as hopeless as she had ever felt, and she wanted to be alone just for a little while longer. The pain was fresh, and she decided she was just going to let it hurt.

She glanced at her desk. The journal was on it, thrown there after the events at the portal. She sat down and opened the book, staring blankly at the page without really reading. She grabbed a pen.


The castle wasn’t as cold anymore, now that Twilight had told her friends everything. They’d been surprised, stunned by what had happened. They’d been horrified when they found out that Sunset was now forever trapped on the other side. Twilight winced when she thought of it as ‘the other side’. Even though their separation was so absolute Sunset might as well be in the afterlife, Twilight nonetheless felt a faint glow of happiness at the thought she was at least alive.

The ensuing conversation had been long, and emotional, but Twilight knew she’d made the right choice in telling her friends. Of course, she still wasn’t fine. She suspected it would be quite some time before she could begin to call herself fine again, but at least there were ponies she could talk to.

And aside from her friends, there was one more pony she needed to have a meeting with. Princess Celestia was the one pony in Equestria who knew what Twilight was going through, having gone through the exact same thing. She wondered how the Princess dealt with it. At the time, though she’d grasped the gravity of the situation intellectually, she didn’t have a clue how it would feel. Well, now she knew.

But all that was for the morning. Right now, she wanted to be alone. Everything hurt, and she’d read that repressing emotions wasn’t healthy, so she intended to just let it come. She looked at the shattered mirror and spotted the journal next to it. It wasn’t vibrating anymore, probably because the connection with its twin had been severed. She grabbed the journal with her muzzle, still refusing to use even the simplest spell for now, in an odd tribute to her now magic-less girlfriend trapped in another world, and placed it on the map table. She opened it to the last page, to finally look at the last message Sunset had sent her.

I love you.