A journey of self-discovery takes an interesting turn when it becomes literal.
Broken by the loss of her friends and son, a far older Twilight Sparkle seeks out the companionship and advice of the only friend she has left, Discord. She knew that the Spirit was just as shaken as her, if only because of the loss of Fluttershy, and yet he managed to continue with life.
As with all things Discord, she was not expecting what she got.
My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I am the Princess of Friendship.
However, what is a Princess of Friendship… without her friends?
I don’t know the answer to that question. So, I decided to seek the advice of one of the four entities in Equestria that are older than me.
I would have spoken to Celestia, but I already knew how loneliness affected her. She hid it well, but eventually I discovered a mare that had been shattered by the loss of her sister, and never quite recovered from it.
I would have spoken to Luna, but I already knew how the loss of her subjects had affected her. She went mad with grief and attempted to bring about Eternal Night. She recovered, but only with help from friends.
I would have asked Cadence, but she’s still holed up in the Crystal Empire, mourning the loss of my brother. She’s yet to deal with it.
That leaves me only one other immortal I could ask, at least an immortal that is, if tentatively, my friend.
Discord.
I really should have known I wouldn’t get a direct answer from him, but… well, I can’t say it wasn’t effective.
---
Twilight Sparkle was awake and out of bed near instantly. She had heard something from downstairs. Grabbing her shield, she crept quietly from her room and down the stairs, hearing a voice swearing to itself.
“...erbucking jerk! He could… east warned me!”
She frowned. That voice sounded familiar. Similar to her own, yet not as rough. A voice that hadn’t spent a lifetime barking orders and drilling Privates.
She carefully pushed the door open just enough to see into her kitchen. A purple pegasus had her back to her as she panted on the floor. She couldn’t see the face, but the form was feminine.
The mare groaned. “I just wanted some advice dammit…” she moaned. “Not to get flung to some random pony’s kitchen.”
Twilight frowned again. So she didn’t actually break into her home on purpose, but was sent here against her will? Could Twilight trust that this oddly familiar mare was in fact innocent?
No. She couldn’t.
With a hard buck, she slammed her kitchen door open, making the strange mare visibly jump. “Hooves in the air! You’re under arrest for breaking and entering!” Twilight shouted as she leapt into the kitchen, brandishing her shield.
The purple pegasus frantically tried to spin around, and Twilight found herself wondering when a mirror had been put between them.
“... What the buck?” The two mares asked in shock upon seeing each other. Their voices intermingled oddly.
Purple eyes, unicorn horn, wings, two-toned purple and rose colored man and tail. Twilight Sparkle found herself staring into the eyes of a mare that was very near a perfect copy of her.
Well… not perfect. She could see differences. Their manes for one. Twilight kept hers short because of the risk in it getting grabbed by an opponent, while this mare had a longer, more cared for mane. Twilight also noticed that she was more physically fit than this new mare, though that wasn’t to say the imposter was fat. She was in good shape, but not the kind that long hours of training almost every day of your life got you.
That was when Twilight’s mind finally kicked in and fury flooded her veins. “Chrysalis! How bucking dare you!” she roared, diving for the mare.
The unknown Alicorn yelped and vanished in a burst of magenta magic. She appeared on the other side of the kitchen. “Wait! I’m not Chrysalis!” she tried to say.
Twilight, however, was having none of it. She reared back with her shield. “I don’t buy it! I don’t know what you’re plan is now, but you aren’t getting whatever you’re after!”
Then she hurled the shield at the mare, her horn flashing with magic. The imposter vanished in another teleport, but Twilight was ready this time and used her magic to bounce her shield off the hardened crystal of her kitchen wall and direct it at the spot the mare exited the teleport.
The last thing the imposter saw before darkness took her was the shield in front of her eyes.
Twilight frowned as the mare hit the floor with a thump, out cold. “Huh. Normally she can take a hit.” She shrugged after a moment, then waited until the transformation on Chrysalis faded so that it was safe to grab her. Those flames Changelings used hurt.
After a full minute of waiting, Twilight’s frown deepened. A Changeling always reverted back to their base form when knocked unconscious, even the ones like Chrysalis and Thorax. Unless…
Twilight built up some magic before unleashing it on the Changeling as a pulse of electricity. The imposter’s body jumped, much like any pony would when they got jolted by a defibrillator… but failed to react in any other way. She was truly unconscious.
The electricity also doubled as a means to break a Changeling’s disguise. Enough electricity scrambled the disguise and shattered it. This imposter still looked like her. So… not an imposter. What then?
“Ow…”
Twilight narrowed her eyes as the mare slowly got back to her hooves. But she didn’t attack. The mare shook her head, holding a hoof to it. The she looked at Twilight. She also frowned.
“That… was rude.”
Then Twilight was flipping through the air, having been blasted through the wall of her kitchen and into the open air of the Crystal Empire. Flaring her wings brought her to a stop. The mare flew up to her, but didn’t attack further. Twilight decided to not retaliate. She did, after all, attack this mare first.
“Who are you?” Twilight asked.
“Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship. You?”
“That’s not possible,” Twilight said. “Because I’m Twilight Sparkle, the Captain of the Royal Guard and one half of the Diarchy of the Crystal Empire.”
Both Twilight’s frowned at each other.
“Well… one of us is clearly lying,” the Princess of Friendship said.
“But which one?” The Captain of the Royal Guard said.
Then the Princess groaned and slapped a hoof to her face. “Stars damn it. DISCORD!!!” she roared to the skies, startling the Captain.
“Sheesh, you’d think she would be more appreciative.”
“I agree. We go out of our way to help her, and get yelled at.”
Both Twilights spun and found a sight that made them both gape. Discord stood there… next to himself.
“... I think I’m gonna be sick…” the Princess suddenly said, before vanishing in a teleport and reappearing next to a trash can on the street, and promptly hurling her lunch.
One of the Discords appeared next to her and held her mane back for her. “Easy there Twi. Shoving you through dimensions like I did is gonna leave you reeling for a while.”
The Captain raised an eyebrow before looking at what she was beginning to suspect was her Discord. “Shoved through dimensions?” she asked.
He snapped his fingers, bringing both of them down to where the Princess was. “Twilight Sparkle of dimension four-five-eight, meet the Twilight Sparkle of dimension zero-zero-two. The Twilight that Lived, as we call her,” he said.
“Ugh… you mean…” the Princess tried to speak, hiccuped, and then her eyes widened and she was once more throwing up in the trash can. “I didn’t even have corn!” she moaned.
“Like the multiverse theory?” the Captain asked in place of her counterpart.
The Discord holding the mane of the Princess nodded. “Only it’s not a theory. Reality is a far bigger place than most wish it was. For every action one of us takes, there is an equal and opposite action that another one of us has taken. Or event. Honestly, if you can imagine it, it’s probably happened to a Twilight out there.” He motioned towards his Twilight, who was now moaning to herself as she almost hung from the edge of the trash can. “My Twilight, for example, is the Twilight that Lived.”
“What do you mean? Do we tend to die?” the Captain asked.
Her Discord nodded. “Yes. Either through battle, old age, or even just an experiment gone wrong. Every Twilight dies eventually… except her.”
The Captain frowned. “So… she’s immortal?”
The Discord holding the Princess nodded. “About as immortal as you can get. In our dimension her Alicorn ascension was slightly different, and it resulted in her becoming immortal. It wasn’t really a problem. At least… it wasn’t until her friends and family began dying around her to old age.”
The Captain’s eyes slowly widened. “The Twilight that Lived,” she said, understanding. She closed her eyes. “How… how many…” she tried to ask.
“She’s the only one, if that’s what you’re asking,” local Discord said. “If you mean how many of her friends… all of them. They all died eventually, some sooner than others. Some messier than others. And some… slower than others.”
The Discord holding the Princess gently pulled her from the trash can and held her in his arms as she shivered, remembering all of her friends. “Spike was the last one. He’s a dragon, so he’s got a ludicrous lifespan, but it eventually ended only a few weeks ago in our world. He… he died after over a century of constantly forgetting who he was… and who Twilight was.”
The Captain frowned. “Spike? You mean… Dragonlord Spike? The same dragon that brought the dragons together into a single society a few years ago?”
“In their world, Twilight hatched him from an egg during an entrance exam into Celestia’s school,” local Discord said. “Twilight raised him as her own.”
The Captain cringed. That meant Twilight had watched her own son die a slow and painful death.
However, as much as she felt bad for this Twilight, she still had one question that needed an answer, one she was sure the Princess wanted to know as well. “Why did you send her here?”
Both Twilights sat in front of each other with a table between them, sipping tea that the Princess had brewed. They were in the Captain's kitchen. The Princess, who's magic was far stronger than the Captain's, was able to repair the hole in the wall she had caused.
"So..." the Captain started, but hesitated.
The Princess nodded. "I know. I can't stay here."
The Captain slowly nodded. "I'm not as well-read as my brother, or you, but even I know you being out of your home dimension can't be good."
The Princess sighed. "I'd go back if I could, but apparently Discord wants me to learn something from here. Stars only know what, though."
The Captain narrowed her eyes, remembering a conversation she had with the Princess’ Discord when they were alone.
“The loss of her son was only the straw that broke a bridge slowly accumulating more and more weight over time. The Princess of Friendship is still there, as it always will be so long as she has even a shred of compassion… but it’s been buried under layers of grief, regret, shame, and even hatred. Twilight needs to be reminded what it means to be the Princess of Friendship… or she’ll become a threat far worse than any version of me could ever have dreamed of being.”
“But why here? Why me? My ascension is based on shattering my destiny, not Friendship.”
“Because, despite your differences, you’re still a Twilight Sparkle.
“You’re still an Element of Magic.”
"He's apparently the expert, though I would hesitate to trust him for anything,” the Captain eventually scoffed. ‘Idiot couldn’t even tell that I’m not the Element of Magic. My brother is,’ she thought to herself.
The Princess noticed the hint of venom in her counterpart's voice and raised an eyebrow. "Is something wrong?"
The Captain sighed. "I just don't get why you would go to a villain, of all things, for advice," she said.
"Oh... he's not reformed in your world?" the Princess asked.
The Captain shook her head. "He's always been a villain. We gave him a chance to reform about a decade ago, but the moment our eyes were off of him he did something to the Elements. They no longer work on him. While he's not causing trouble on the same scale he did back when he first escaped, he tends to be an annoying pain in the ass from time to time, making confrontations with other criminals more difficult for shits and giggles, in his words."
The Princess frowned. “That’s not right. The Elements can’t just be altered. Corrupted, yes, but only through the actions of their bearers, not an outside influence.”
“I’m not a bearer. My brother is the Element of Magic, not me, though I have on occasion been given the armor for some reason.”
The Princess blinked. “Armor?” she asked.
The Captain waved a hoof. “You know, the Armor of Harmony? That’s what we call it in our world.” She noticed the Princess’ growing confusion. “The armor that the Elements become when activated? It changes to suit whoever wears it. That armor?”
The Princess frowned, then closed her eyes in concentration. With a flash of light the Captain found the six Elements of Harmony floating around the Princess. No… no, wait. They were different. They lacked the golden adornments. It was just the gems. It was the Captain’s turn to blink. “Um… how did you…?” she asked slowly.
“They’re not your Elements, don’t worry. They’re copies of the Elements from my world, connection to the Tree of Harmony and all. I discovered how to reforge not only them, but how to regrow the Tree of Harmony in the event it’s ever destroyed.” The Princess noticed the dull color of the Elements. “That said, being out of their home dimensions may have severed that connection.”
“Huh. I’ve never seen them outside of their settings,” the Captain noted. “Why’d you summon them?”
“A test. Catch.”
The Captain yelped as the Element of Magic was tossed to her. She tried to catch it in her magic but it seemed to slip right through her aura. She scrambled to catch it with her hooves. Once she had firm grip on the star though…
“Whoa…” the Captain murmured as she examined the simple golden shield the Element of Magic had turned into. “I didn’t know these things could change separate from the others.”
The Princess had a notebook and quill and was making notes. “EoM instantly latched onto possible candidate and attuned to subject. The EoM drew power from the subject and shaped itself based on expectations. No, surface thoughts? Maybe...” She paused, thinking. “Is that why we only ever got beams of magic, I wonder? We pretty much just wanted the Elements to DO something the first time, and expected the reaction we got every time afterwards.”
The Captain looked to the Princess, the shield in her hooves returning to the shape of a now glittering purple star once she was no longer focusing on it. “What was the point of that?”
The Princess frowned. “Like I said, a test.” She smirked. “Sorry, but you are an Element Bearer, or a potential bearer. In the event your brother is unavailable, the Element of Magic will default to you. I need one more thing to make a conclusive statement though. Can you take me to your Elements of Harmony?”
---
“Here they are.” The Captain opened the box she had pulled from under her bed. “I keep them on me at all times because Shining can use his portals to get to them from anywhere anyways. No real point in a security system.”
The Princess nodded, taking the glittering Elements into her aura. She was consumed with ancient memories as she beheld the Elements in the golden setting that she had not seen since her friends were still alive. She wiped away a tear that tried to trickle from her eye and immediately got to work examining the Elements.
“So, what are you trying to figure out?” The Captain asked curiously, tactfully ignoring the tears.
“The Elements of Harmony, after they were reconnected to the Tree of Harmony during the whole Nightmare Night fiasco, became subsumed in the power of Harmony. More than that, they are constantly being powered by the Tree so long as it exists and the connection is there. No source of Chaos Magic should be capable of holding them, let alone altering them, so long as that connection is there.”
“Discord touched them during our first encounter with him. He even hid them,” the Captain reminded her counterpart.
The Princess nodded. “He did, but that was due to two things. When he hid the Elements, he was capable of doing so because the Plunder Vines had pretty much killed the connection to the Tree at that point. They still contained Harmony Magic, but only a limited supply, and Discord used that to his advantage. The other time he touched them was when you faced him while you all were inverted, I’m guessing?” The Captain nodded slowly at that, still somewhat sore over how easily the Spirit had turned her into a lazy slacker that ran from responsibility.
“Well, that was the problem. You and your friends were so out of tune with Harmony and each other that the Elements couldn’t get power from you, leaving them mostly inert in an attempt to remain active and not go into shutdown mode again,” the Princess explained.
She suddenly frowned, holding both Elements of Magic in her aura. “Are you sure Discord altered the Elements? I’m not sensing any kind of Chaos Magic or difference in the connection to the Tree of Harmony.”
The Captain nodded. “When we tried to use them on him, they did nothing. Well, they cleaned up his current mess, but that was it. He laughed at us and said he had broken the power the Elements had over him forever.”
The Princess turned to look at her counterpart, staring as if in disbelief. The Captain shuffled slightly after a moment, somewhat uncomfortable with the stare. “What?” she asked.
The Princess sighed and rubbed her face with a hoof. “Discord, the Lord of Chaos, the Troll of Trolls himself, told you he had messed with the Elements… and you believed him?!”
The Captain blinked. “What?”
The Princess groaned. “I swear, the older I get…” she mused to herself. “Right, so… what happens when the Elements of Harmony hit somepony who is not, inherently, evil?”
The Captain blinked again. “Er… nothing?” she guessed. They had never tried using the Elements on an innocent, so she wasn’t sure.
The Princess nodded. “And what happened when you hit Discord with them?”
The Captain paused, the dots connecting in her mind. “You mean…? This whole time he’s been playing us for fools!” she roared, standing suddenly.
The Princess noted how her counterpart’s shield seemingly warped to her hoof. “Yes. As is his nature, he played a trick on you… one you all too willingly let him play.”
The Captain stopped. “Then… wait, so he’s good?”
The Princess waved a hoof. “Eh. Good may be a stretch. Despite how close I am to my Discord, even I get frustrated with the things he pulls. However, I’m willing to bet he’s not evil, and that Fluttershy knows.”
“Fluttershy? Why her?” the Captain asked curiously.
“Because in my world, she’s the reason Discord reformed. She was his driving force for becoming a better pony… person… thing,” the Princess eventually settled on an adjective. “If the only difference in our worlds is the timeline and that you and Shining swapped roles, I bet she’s still his source light.”
“Fluttershy was the one that was supposed to reform Discord somehow… and honestly she never seemed all that heartbroken over his betrayal.” The Captain sighed. “But why would she hide this? Discord’s caused so much chaos in the years since his release.”
The Princess eventually shrugged. “Could be a few things, but it doesn’t really matter, does it? Her life is her own. She can keep her own secrets, as well as the secrets of her friends. Besides, has Discord ever actually hurt anyone? I mean as in being the direct and purposeful cause of true mental anguish, or of loss of life and or limb?”
The Captain thought back, before eventually sighing again. She was doing that a lot today. “No. The worst he’s ever done is give some of our enemies a power boost. However, because we still win in the end, I’m beginning to suspect it was more of a placebo effect than anything.”
The Princess smiled. “There you go. Your Discord in not evil. Maybe not good, per-se, but not evil. A little more trust in him may not hurt.”
The Captain shook her head. “He’s an enemy of the state. I can’t trust him unless he willingly gives up his Chaos for good. He’s a constant cause for upheaval to public order and panic. He will never be trusted by me or any other Royal Guard so long as he continues to enjoy his Chaos.”
The Princess’ eyes grew stony at that, startling the Captain. “So you want him to just commit suicide for your sense of Order?” she asked.
The Captain… had not been expecting that. “What? No! I want him to become a law-abiding, productive member of society, and he can’t do that if everything he does flies in the face of Law and Order!”
The Princess stared at the Captain, and the Captain realized she was searching for something. Eventually the Princess closed her eyes and settled. “You don’t know,” she stated simply. “I had thought, for just a moment, that you and I were more different than I thought. That you would condemn a pony for the circumstances of their birth.”
“Hey, Princess, you… aren’t making sense,” the Captain said somewhat uncomfortably.
The Princess sighed. Yep. A lot of sighs todays. “Discord is the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony. His power, his very essence, is derived from chaos and disharmony. It not only empowers him, but it’s what keeps him alive.” She looked up at the Captain, who looked shocked. “He gave up Disharmony for Friendship, and that sacrifice drastically reduced his power. If he were to give up Chaos as well… he would die.”
“How…?” The Captain shook her head. “How can you be sure he didn’t trick you into believing that?” she asked, unwilling to accept that answer.
“Because I’m the Element of Magic. I AM Magic. The magic of all who dwell within Equestria is just as accessible to me as it is to them, and I can read it like I can read a book.”
The Captain shuddered as, in her eyes, the pony who looked just like her suddenly appeared much different than her. This mare. This ancient, ageless mare, was battleworn, war-weary, and scarred.
“I can see all that makes up every pony. I can see the very building blocks of life, all because it is all tied to magic in some way or another.”
And she was so. Very. Tired.
She finally understood why the Princess’ Discord had sent her on this journey. She realized now why he had been so worried. This was never a journey of self-discovery.
The Princess seemed to shrink in on herself slightly, and yet in the Captain’s eyes she only grew larger, her presence becoming all consuming.
“I am, for all intents and purposes, The Goddess of Magic…” The Princess of Friendship whispered harshly to herself.
Twilight Sparkle, Captain of the Royal Guard, laid in her bed later that night. She realized it was close to morning, but her mind refused to let her sleep. She stared at her ceiling, the subject of Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, dancing in her thoughts.
A wise pony once said that immortality was the path to madness. Twilight couldn’t remember which pony actually said that, but she realized that it was an accurate saying. Her counterpart had survived long enough to not only become an Alicorn, but to gather enough power to become something akin to a Goddess.
Survived long enough… Twilight sighed. The Princess hadn’t survived long enough. She had been dragged, kicking and screaming, into every single year, every decade, century, millenia… time cared not for the wants and desires of others.
She never survived. She merely lived. After all, she couldn’t die… not even by her own hoof.
“I realize this is probably a question I shouldn’t ask, but… have you ever considered just ending it yourself?” the Captain asked.
The Princess nodded. “I did, but my brand of immortality acts on its own. I regenerate from everything, even complete atomization. My soul itself will reconstitute a body from magic in the event there is nothing left to regenerate from. I… didn’t handle that revelation well.”
The Captain decided not to press her luck with further questions on that topic.
To live forever… regardless of wishes to the contrary. Twilight didn’t know how she’d react if it was her in that situation. She never asked how old her counterpart really was, but Discord had dropped a clue in the form of the Princess’ son, Spike. A dragon. They tended to live upwards of… well… a really long time. And this one had passed from what had sounded like natural causes.
So the Princess was probably fairly damn old, even if she didn’t look a day over twenty-one.
Ancient.
And despite that, she seemed to be maintaining her sanity. Twilight shook her head with another sigh. No. The other Twilight was good at faking it, but there were signs that she had snapped. Hidden well, but not professionally. She probably snapped a long time ago, but held herself together on pure willpower. Perhaps for the benefit of her son, if nothing else. But when he died…
Yes, Twilight could see all too easily why the other Discord was so worried. But then that begs the question; what was she supposed to learn here? What in this world could reignite that spark that, in Discord’s words, every Twilight Sparkle shared? What spark?
What did Discord think the Captain, a war-weary soul herself, could possibly reveal to the Princess of Friendship?
She sighed again. She knew The Princess needed to accept that she likely had no peer anymore, had figured that out during Twilight’s slightly unhinged declaration of who… what she was. But she eventually realized there had to be more to it than that. This was the living embodiment of friendship, for crying out loud! Accepting that fact would only do so much.
Unfortunately, the answer eluded her. However, at least getting the Princess to accept what she was should give her time to think about this. Maybe at the end she’d have a better idea.
As sleep finally began to claim her, she wondered if perhaps Princess Luna would have any ideas.
---
“May your tears never dry.
“May your blood never cease.
“May silence ever haunt you.
“May memories ever taunt you.
“May you never forget.
“May you ever remember.
“That you did this to me.
“That I hate you.”
The Princess had long since mastered the art of concealing one’s emotions, so she did nothing more than sigh as she opened her eyes.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered to herself, before rolling over on the couch her counterpart had let her borrow for the night.
“I’m… so sorry…
“Spike…”
---
Discord sighed from the Astral Realm as he watched his oldest friend through time and space. Celestia, marked by age with wrinkles and slowly fading musculature, sat beside him. Also watching.
“I don’t think she’ll ever forgive herself, Discord,” Celestia said slowly, yet surely. Age may have slowed her down, but her mind was still as active as ever.
Discord nodded, his own slightly aged features, which he normally kept hidden, all the more apparent by his sadness. “I’m afraid your right, Tia. Twilight is never going to let go of the guilt, but… maybe this journey will give her the strength to withstand it. I dearly hope I’m not making a mistake…”
Celestia rubbed his back with a hoof comfortingly. “Neither of us has too much longer left. We owe it to her. This idea of yours is probably the only thing that will save her.” She sighed. “I don’t think I can pass on knowing I’m the cause of her anguish.”
Discord looked at her. “It was hardly your fault for speeding up the inevitable. Destiny had marked her long before you got your hooves on her. She would have ascended without your intervention.”
“She still hates me for it, though.”
Discord heaved another sigh. “Yes. I’m afraid she’ll always carry a small amount of hate for you, even if she tries to hide it. That’s one of the things she’ll have to face on her own time eventually.”
He smiled after a moment. “But I have faith in her. Twilight’s strong. She’s overcome everything life has thrown at her. She’ll conquer this as well.”
Celestia also smiled, leaning into Discord’s side. “She may need to be reminded once in while, but she’s the strongest of all of us. She’s done so much good for the world, and will do even more.” She closed her eyes and gave a happy sigh. “I still have that vision once in a while. I know she can do this.”
Discord turned his gaze upwards, towards the distant stars of the realm. “Unity…” he whispered, also smiling. “It’ll be quite the spectacle,” he admitted. “I only wish we would be here to see it.”