A man gets displaced as Dry Bowser after buying an item from the wrong merchant.
It all started on a normal day on a normal schedule. I was your ordinary man, and I bought this weird book from a merchant, brang it back home and opened it, and it sucked me out of Earth and into this place inhabited by mutant horses called 'Equestria'.
Oh, and didn't I forget to mention I'm Dry Bowser now? You know, Bowser's skeletal counterpart that slowly became his own character? That guy. The book was about displacement, and I am most definitely one of those things.
Hope the walking, talking, dragon-turtle skeleton won't scare anyone? Oh wait, it will.
You know when you have these days where everything was changed? I know how you feel, if becoming a fictional character and being transported to another universe, not dimension, go figure, is that thing. This is my story, and boy, is it a tale that shall be told, by me, of course. My original name was Bartholomew Takauji, a guy of Japanese-American descent, and your typically average joe in the typically average crowd. I wasn't in a very good financial position at the time, and my little sister died in a fire in the house, but there was this book I brought that changed it all forever.
How, you may ask. Why? Who? What? Well, my siblings gave me some money for my birthday, and I was able to get to a firmer position on my feet. Over the months, I became better off, and I could afford greater things. Reading was one of my many beloved things. When the flea market came to Sacremento, I scurried off, and this merchant had something rather interesting at his stands, which was also something I rather loved: books, and a whole lot of them, too, but I also loved various franchises from electronic media as well. "Be warned, my boy. If you open this book, there will be no turning back from whenst you came." he said once I picked out a certain book. I was just picking some random book, that's all.
"Alright, I guess." I said awkwardly, not believing what the man said. As soon as I bought the book, I immediately took it back to my home to read it. I plopped down on my bed, laying on my belly. "Manual of the Displaced? Huh, seen better and worse story titles than that." I opened the book, but that decision was my biggest mistake. I jumped backward when the book began to glow. "Hey! What's the big idea?" I tried to run away, but the door slammed shut. "Oh God no! Please let me out of here!" I cried, banging on the door as the book began to glow brightly, and with a bright flash of rainbow light, everything flashed into blackness. "What did I do to deserve this?" I said before I fell unconscious.
When my mind came back to its senses, I heard birds tweeting. Was it all just a dream. "What time is it?" I slurred as my eyes opened to see a blue background with blurry white shapes. I can't move my body, and I feel so thin and bony for some reason, but soon, my vision cleared, and I saw a clear blue sky above me, with a bunch of clouds and the occasional bird flying to a certain direction. The sun was also bright, and I attempted to cover it with my hand, but instead of the familiar human hand, I saw a four-fingered (and yeas, that even counts the thumb), clawed hand that was made entirely out of bones, and on my wrist, was a spiked band. "Wait, what?" I said, my voice a bit deeper than I knew, as I trailed down my arm, hoping it was a prank or a dream. "Gah!" I said in realization as I saw bones. My stomach! Bones! My legs were also nothing but bones, I even felt that I had a TAIL now, despite being bones itself! I attempted to get up, but I felt something hold on to the ground, but I won the struggle, and I felt that I had a bony, spiked shell. "What the hell happened to me!?" I said, feeling the spikes with my hand. I went to check my head, and I felt a draconic face with distinctively oxlike horns, and strangely enough, a lock of hair. But a thought just came to me.
"Where am I?" I thought aloud as I got up and looked around, looking at where I was right about now. I was in a clearing in the middle of a forest, and another thought came to me? What was I supposed to be? I needed a mirror! I turned to see a creek nearby. That will do, I guess. I quickly ran down to the creek, and saw the face of Dry Bowser. Yes, I saw the face of the skeletal form of one of the most iconic villains in history. "I'm... Dry Bowser?" I said, trying to process the information that was now in my mind. Welp, could've been worse. I turned around to think of what to do, when I saw the same book the merchant gave to me. "Why that little-" I said, roaring into the sky, letting out a stream of neon blue flames before my sentence was completed. Man, that was spicy! But my attention turned to the book.
I had the feeling that if anything can tell me anything about my situation, it had to be that book, and it could tell me how to control my abilities, and at best, how to get out of here and back to the way I was, or it was all a dream. The book was exactly the same, but will it bring me back to my world? Only one way to find out. I carefully waked to the book, which had somehow adjusted to my new size, and grabbed it with a bony hand. I turned the page to see... no vortex. Just your regular old ordinary non-magical book.
Shit.
But there was good news. "Manual of the Displaced, a Professional Guide on How to Be a Displaced." I read before turning over to the next page. Dry Bowser or not, I'm now a displaced, or whatever that really means. "You may be wondering why you are different and where you are. Well, you are a Displaced, or Dimensionally Misplaced, as they're called. I know, dimension does not mean universe, but it wasn't corrected because the shorter term sounded much better than something like Uniplaced and it name matched the meaning. Anywho, if you are displaced, then that means you have ended up in another world as a person or character with contact to his/her abilities, and on some occasions, you will have access to abilities from one or more characters as well." Well, it did tell me what I was. I don't trust it, but it's the only reliable source of information I have.
"Alright," I said as I turned the page. "While the displaced can appear anywhere, many of them find themselves in a version of a place called Equestria." Equestria? That's the main place for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. I was a little bummed that it had to end, but I was mad that they ruined the whole thing, making all the races live in separate universes and turning Twilight into an earth pony, and Spike was a racist from another universe for adults. Why didn't they just keep the old show when they earned so much from it? If this universe had a version of Faust, I would strangle her and break her neck the moment I meet her for what my version did. It would be so relieving, I must admit, but there was a book that needs to be read. "Equestria is a place found in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and there are some requirements you must go through. Tip number one: If you are in the past, try not to get on the bad side of Celestia and Luna, you might get stoned for 1,000 years. Tip number two: If you are in the present, befriend Fluttershy first, since she is the most open of the six main characters. Tip number three: It doesn't matter if the character you are is a hero or a villain. Some displaced villians can become heroes and some heroes follow the path of villainy, it's your decision. Tip number four: There is a good chance that you will find other displaced, but it is rare." Well, that's good news. "Sometimes, you may wind up in another generation of My Little Pony, be cautious." I don't mind the other three, but I hate Gen 5, it's a waste of time.
"If you want extra information, then you can turn to the contents." Good enough for me. I turned to the book's table of contents, and saw some various references. "Gotta save it for later." I said as I put the book in my shell, fortunately, it did not go into my stomach, that would've been awkward, weird, and embarrassing to get out. I looked around the clearing before walking out. There's no good in just staying here and getting older, not that I could die, anyway. Could I?
And if I'm very lucky, then I could find some fellow displaced, and maybe even my sister, if she didn't die in the fire like many believed her. They never found the body, or even a skeleton, so there's a chance she could be displaced as some other character in this world, I would expect a fire-based character, so maybe she caused the fire when transforming into whatever she is. As I walked into the forest, I wondered where I was in My Little Pony, if I was in it in the first place.
"One, two, three." I said as I threw a newly-conjured bone at a nearby megalith, shattering it and sending its chunks flying in various directions as I smirked. I happened into another clearing, filled with megaliths and other giant stones. I held out my hand again and conjured up another bone. "One, two, three." I then threw it at yet another megalith. I had taken the time to practice my magic here. Thankfully, there were no other people nearby, just the occasional animals. But that thing is all that counts, right? Right? Anyway, I switched paces and looked at a stray tree, and inhaled deeply. I felt a burning sensation go right up my neck bones, and bent forward, exhaling a stream of blue fire that burned the tree to an ashy crisp that blew away in the breeze.
"Perfect. Fully mastered my basic abilities." I said as I walked right into the nearby river as submerged in it. I didn't have to bother closing my eyes for this one, although it was rather tingly feeling the water run through my skull. I then got up from the riverbank as I looked off to see what I had done with the area. "Heh, not bad for a skeleton, I must admit. But I should go now, God forbid running into any trouble." I said as I continued going down the forest, leaving a mess behind as the wider world awaited. Pretty convenient to place those things there, huh, universe? Or is it multiverse? Ah, who cares about that as of now, the rocks, or the trees? Oh well, saves me the pain for asking. I was practicing my basic abilities, such as bone manipulation and fire breath. I learned that there was also telekinesis and teleportation, as I saw a nearby pebble get engulfed in a blue aura and gain a blue tint before levitating a few meters before falling back down. That will have to be mastered soon. Hmm, makes me wonder what time period I am in. A roaring sound came from behind me as I looked to see a giant cat. It roared at me and charged towards my direction. "Tough." I said as I materialized a bone in my hand. "Batter up!" I said as I swung it like a baseball bat, and rammed it full force into the cat, sending its severed head skyward. "Fore!" I yelled as I looked at the head as it disappeared from my vision with a blink of light. "Gwahaha! Already a newbie and I have it under the bag now." I said as I looked around before looking at the corpse of the once mighty feline, thinking about what to do with it.
I am a skeleton, so I do not need to eat its meat, so that is a no-go. I pulled out a sword blade-shaped metal I found from within one of the shattered boulders and some flint and began skinning the corpse with the flint until I got some basic leather straps. I learned how to craft objects at one of my old camps, so this is easy, although disgusting, it stains my bones. With the raw materials I had at my disposal and some basic magic, within a few hours, I made a small sword I could wield, with the metal blade, a guard made out of bones, and a handle made from a stick, all strapped together with leather and tar. It would do for now. I soon saw another light nearby, and walked out. I was half-expecting another clearing, but I finally found myself in the edge of the forest. "Finally, out of that maze." I stated as I saw myself atop the edge of a hill. It was very beautiful. I could see a mountain range at the distance and beautiful clouds over a wide meadow that had the occasional tree in it. I also saw something else. Smoke, more specifically, chimney smoke. And where's the chimney smoke, there's a settlement. Fortunately, I blew the cat head in the opposite direction, so hopefully they didn't notice it at all.
"Dragon skeleton came out of forest, I do not like this." I heard a voice say.
"Huh?" I say as I look towards the sound of the voice. I saw a sea green earth pony mane with a blue mane. She seemed to be wearing what looked like primitive cloth and a bone necklace. "And when am I supposed to be, now?"
"Dragon skeleton talks! Dragon skeleton has blood on it. I must warn guard and town- EEP! I want down now! I want down now!" she said as she was caught in my hand. I looked at her eye level.
"And who happens to rule this place, now?" I ask as she shivered in response.
"Okay, why didn't you say so, Beverly?" I said, making a reference Scott's quote to B from Total Drama: Revenge of the Island before dropping her as pulling out my book as she ran down to the village from whence she came from, and I honestly didn't know who her name was, nor do I care. I saw a few cottages surrounded by primitive farms. Said cottages had a base of stone with wood walls and a thatched roof. Alright, now where am I? I'm not in the Grazing Age, it's too early, and it doesn't sound like an era ruled by Celestia and/or Luna, either. So, I looked in the book. "The Precelestial Era. This era is in between the Grazing Age and the first Hearth's Warming. Huh, it sounded a bit like cave talk she was saying, but more formal. It varies upon universe, and it depends on how Celestia and Luna's childhood goes. Sometimes, they're orphans, sometimes they ascend into alicornhood, and sometimes, they are born royalty." I read. Queen Galaxia? King Aristotle? Those names sound royal to me, so I'm guessing they're Celestia and Luna's parents in this universe, or whatever. That means that the two sisters were babies, children, or not even born yet. Anyway, I should not get on the bad side of those two, and I only know things from fanon profiles about Celestia and Luna's parents. I sighed and walked to the left. Well, at least with Celestia and Luna, I could get some intel, but their parents are another story. Why did I have to go through it half-blind now is a mystery to me. Should I get through this blind or not? This has been a weird day so far, and I still don't get anything. But I may need something fast to get away before that mare's word gets out of the village. I looked to see a cart in the distance, being pulled by what looked like a cow. Man, what to do, if that thing gets into the village right now, God knows what will happen. Think, boy, think. There's gotta be something to do. They'd just think she is crazy and send her to the asylum if it is my world, but this is Equestria, so there's gotta be magic around here.
"Aristotle, I have a feeling that something bad is coming." Galaxia said to her husband, Aristotle. Galaxia herself was a whitish-orange alicorn with a brilliant blue mane and a spiral galaxy cutie mark, while Aristotle was a midnight blue alicorn with a dark purple mane and a white star for a cutie mark, both of which were dressed in their regalia.
"I have a feeling of that, too, but, you still have the baby to look after." Aristotle said as Galaxia looked to see her still pregnant belly. "It won't be another month until she comes out, and I don't want our first foal to be put in harm's way if what you are saying is true." Aristotle said. Whether it be a prince or princess, they needed an heir.
"I guess you have a point with me." Galaxia admitted. "But we still need to figure out what is happening, I am not half-sure what it is, whether it be a Chaos Bringer or something else." She then looked out a window. "But are you feeling hungry by any chance?" the white alicorn asked as she heard a grumble from her belly.
Aristotle heard a grumble from his belly as well. "Well, no purpose thinking about it on an empty stomach. I'll have the chefs prepare a meal for us and put it here." the blue alicorn said as he looked back at Galaxia and kissed her before going on his way to request his meal. Galaxia always liked the casseroles they made, and so did he. Whatever that threat is or where it came from, they weren't entirely sure on it. But they were sure that they really needed a mean lunch today.
What, or how would you feel if you have found yourself not in your own home, but in a world full of sentient, multicolored horses capable of building a civilization? Very confused, as that was how I felt. That, and being a dragon-turtle skeleton around eight feet tall would make you think about your next step. So, I kept along the outskirts of the forest as I watched the cart continue on its way, thinking about how I should play my cards. As I walked closer towards it, I tripped on a rock and fell, but not before catching myself on the nick of time.
Thank goodness I still have my quick reactions. Otherwise, I'd be mere dust by now. I caught myself with my hands and pulled myself back up onto my feet. Suddenly, out of the blue, highwaymen, or highwayponies, in this case, showed up and caught the poor guy by surprise, grabbing him, stabbing him with a sword, breaking his horn, tying a heavy-looking stone to his leg, and throwing him into the river to drown to death. Perfect way of getting a mode of transportation, huh, guys? The cart's diver would probably be dead before I could save him, so I could attack the highwayponies and get my transportation. Gah, now I'm starting to think like a- wait, that'll do. They were way too busy ransacking the cart for anything useful, and I might as well join because the path was near the forest, but I'm not gonna get some stuff, I'm here for the cart itself.
Fortunately, there were only three, but there could be more. As they were plundering the cart, I spat out a blue fireball towards their direction, and perfectly landed it right in front, with additional smoke as well. "Showtime." I say, jumping out from the forest and into the spot where they were. I summoned a bone, and whacked the first one unconscious, and then went to the second one, knocking him out as well. The third one managed to dodge it and drew his sword, slicing my bone into two, but not before I caused a bone to erupt from the earth, launching him sky high, but he caught himself midair with his wings. Before he could land a hit on me, I inhaled deeply and shot out a fireball, leaving him nothing but a sweet-smelling collection of ash. It was too late to save the original driver, he was drowning by the looks of it, but his cart could provide me something that's either useful or crappy. Unfortunately, the cow was dead, so there wasn't anything to pull that I could use. There was the highwaymen, but I don't wanna be stoned.
So, I grabbed them and threw them in the river along with the driver and pulled the cart into the forest so I could have a safe place to scavenge for supplies that I might need. As soon as I went far enough, I began to look in the cart for anything that I could use. "Apples, pears, grain, yada yada ya, nope, nope, nope." The contents of that cart consisted mainly of things like food and grain, but no meat, since ponies were vegetarian by nature. But just because it mainly consisted of one item does not mean there were other things in the mix. With some further scavenging, I found that there were also some useful things in the mix, like a few iron tools and weapons, and strangely enough, an unwritten leather book.
And yes, I am very much aware that there were no books in the Middle Ages, but this is Equestria, so things can be a teensy bit different from A to B to C. The remaining highwaymen can have the food for themselves, as a skeleton is unable to eat. I took another sword, an axe, and the book with me, which is going to be my journal. Now, the story that you are being told and the journal itself are two very different things, so do not get confused. "It has been roughly eight hours since I first woke up in this land. So, it would still be considered: Day One. This also doubles as my first entry in this old journal." I wrote with a quill that also was found in the dead guy's cart. "I woke up as Dry Bowser: the skeletal counterpart to the iconic villain: Bowser Koopa. Being undead isn't a good treat, especially is you are reduced to nothing but a walking, talking skeleton. I also woke up with a Manual for the Displaced, which will come in handy. I have wandered the forest, practicing my power, and walked upon the town, finding a pony. I still am not sure when I am, but I have a feeling that I'm in the Precelestial Era: the era before Celestia and Luna's rule. As for where I got this book from, I got it from a cart being plundered by some highwaymen, or highwayponies, in this case. There is not much else to be written, so this is Bartholemew, or as the name I am under now: Dry Bowser, signing out for the day." I wrote.
I turned to the cart and ransacked it for anything else that is useful or interesting. Fortunately, my shell had a bit in common with Pinkie Pie's mane, both being supposedly infinite in space, and we can pull anything we would want out of our respective hammerspace, but unlike Pinkie, I could only pull out what I already had in me, nor can I put in anything that is too big. But still, that is a plus over having to carry everything by hand, not that I am really complaining about what was equipped with me or anything. I honestly didn't feel bad about what I did with the highwaymen, but I was a little bit desperate and they left an innocent person to drown and die. Oh well, this stuff can get me through for a while.
I continued along the path across the outskirts of the forest, calmly enjoying the scenery. The Precelestial Era is an era that could change the course of Equestria forever due to my actions, that is, if I am in it. Galaxia and Aristotle are a mystery to me, and I wonder what they look like, and if this really is Equestria in the past. This is too detailed and vivid to be a dream, and I knew that as an undead being, I can live forever if I play my cards right. I am not the guy to think about other people's lives, or the guy that selflessly saves others. I'm more of a scavenger, taking lying in my grasp.
I looked to see a mountain range in the distance, but abruptly stopped when I realized my telekinetic abilities. I was able to crush rocks into pebbles with it, and the mountains seem like a good place to practice my abilities. There are no large cities and the closest thing to it is the occasional herd of mountain goats grazing in the alpine meadows. I also thought about where to live, and thought of my own telekinetic abilities, something that Dry Bowser didn't have, and the aura was more akin to that of Mewtwo from Pokémon or Sans from Undertale. But the former's abilities enabled them to build a castle around their old home, so, maybe I am just as potent? Oh well, there's one way to find out and one only.
I smirked as I held my hand out, and a nearby megalith was engulfed in a blue aura. I pulled back my arm as I curled my hand into a fist, and it came closer at a steady pace. I knew that I could do it without gestures, but this was a good way to practice my magic and get a good understanding of it. I looked at the cliff that I was using as target practice, and made an impressive impression of a pitcher, 'pitching' the megalith and throwing it right at the cliff, where it landed, piercing itself onto the cliff. There were exactly a hundred and eighty-two others where that came, some shattered, some went through the sides of the floor of the valley I was practicing in, and others just fell onto the ground, and those that did were just my first tries on testing my new power.
I feel like I'm accomplishing something, but at the same time, I'm just feeling plain stupid. Why? Is it that I was interfering with the history of Equestria and how it should be? Maybe part of my imagination getting the best of me. Telekinesis was not the only thing I practiced. I also honed in on my bone attacks, and I was not just limited to throwing them, I was also capable of causing a bone to emerge from the earth to impale my enemy, as you may have heard, but I can also make them appear out of nowhere and shoot them at my enemies. I knew very well that Bowser was able to teleport, but many of the more complex spells would be saved for later, as well as telekinesis without moving my hand. Well, my guess is that it may take years to accomplish it, but being undead and all, it makes me sad knowing that I can't eat, I would surely miss all the fine tastes of all the food I once savored and love. I cannot sleep, either, being in this form, and it was night now, the moon was high when I threw that last megalith. I never felt anything on my feet, is that what nothing feels like? But this is an unfamiliar land, and I gotta stay strong. I looked to my left and then to my right, I sighed, and went on my way through the valley, leaving a bunch of thrown megaliths, cracked cliffs, and shattered rocks in my wake as I went on my trek to the other side of the valley to God knows where I'll wind up. "Why did I buy that book?" I said as I went on my way.
Some time in the future, in the same valley, an alicorn of purple hue rode on a train. Twilight and Spike were idily sitting in the train tracks, with the former reading a book and the latter drinking his drink. "Spike, it's been a while since it was just you and I, huh?" the purple alicorn said to her draconic sibling.
"I agree, Twilight. Today is our day. No quests for friendship, no reports to deliver, no snotty aristocrats, we deserve a good rest after the Cozy Glow incident." Spike replied. Twilight never thought that a mere filly could be a serious threat to the magic of Equestria, but live and learn. The School had to be temporarily closed for the week, and not because of anything wrong, Cozy attacked two months ago. It was Fall break, and everyone worked so hard. Twilight held onto the hope that nothing could go wrong as she continued on her book. This particular train was going through the Smokey Mountains and the Unicorn Range up to the Crystal Empire, both of which were very beautiful during fall. Twilight also came to see Flurry Heart and babysit her like her mother did with Twilight herself. Before you can say bananas, the voice of the conductor spoke.
"Alright, everybody." Twilight's ears perked at the last word. "Today, we are entering the Brakebone Mountains. Nopony knows why megaliths penetrate the cliffside, nor do we know about the bones sticking out of the ground, but traces of magic had showed somebody was there to do it." the conductor said, causing the Princess of Friendship to jolt up from her reading state in shock. They were supposed to be the Smokey Mountains! She looked out her window to see the cliffs penetrated by giant stones, and what looked like bones sticking out from the ground and cliffs, some of which had moss growing on them, some were broken and half lying on the ground. "Don't worry, it's harmless, no one who had touched these millenia-old bones had died even so much as a day afterwards, but please do not play with the bones, they might fall on you." Just then, one of the megaliths fell onto the soil, creating a hole large enough for it to fit.
"Spike! Something weird is going on. I am getting a bit worried here!" Twilight said as she nudged Spike with a wing, and the little dragon looked out to see the mountains, many of which were covered with bones and misplaced megaliths.
"Um, Twilight? What's worrying you?" Spike asked. "We're going to the Crystal Empire to visit Cadence, Shining, and Flurry for the next day or so." He knew his sister was always a bit worried about something from time to time.
"That's not it, Spike. Look out the window!" Twilight said as she and Spike looked at the megaliths that were on the cliffside and the bones penetrating the area. "See, this is not normal! Why are there giant stones lodged into the cliffs and bones laying every which way." Twilight asked as Spike looked out the window. Spike scratched his head.
"You're right about a few things. There's something fishy going on here." her draconic companion said as he put his hands on the glass of the window. "Even I do not know what is going on with the valley."
"I know, right? I mean, there are bones sticking out every which way and stones that were lodged onto the cliff, almost as if they were being thrown by something." Twilight said before looking at Spike. "Spike, the Smokey Mountains have changed into this. The conductor said something about magic, so I was thinking that it had to do with somepony, may not even be a pony, behind this." Twilight looked to her little brother, then to the cliffs, and back to Spike. "I really hope that this is just some weird shared dream, but we need to look at our surroundings more, and maybe talk some more in private. Who knows when something else would change." Twilight said as Spike nodded.
I walked across the forest, twirling a bone with my hand as I admired the scenery. Guess the cliffs behind me have seen better days. Wonder what somebody would do if they find it, I dunnow. As I kept on walking, I heard a loud roar come in from me, and I turned around to see a dragon walking towards my direction with an angry look on their face. Welp, I don't know about you, but my nonexistent gut's telling me things are gonna get ugly. Here begins my first battle.
