Devil’s Due: Canterlot Archives, by Petro!
Commissioned for Devil's Due, by All American
Sorry about the wait AA, please don't kill me, and your official character is named "Black Powder".
Date: 3 July 2PH
Case ID: B1066
Subject: Laney, Ryan
On the night of April 24th, 2PH (Post-Harmony), subject Ryan Laney was summoned to Equestria by her highness Princess Celestia to stop Ryan from killing himself. According to the Princess, Laney is a 21 year-old male member of the long extinct species Homo sapiens sapiens, commonly referred to as humans. After he was transported from his world to ours, Laney was subdued inside his own personal chambers until he inevitably regained consciousness. After his renewed collection of sensible thought patterns, Ryan broke free from his chambers, only to be confronted with his savior and apparent bane of existence, Princess Celestia. As was expected, due to the Princess being the one who summoned him here, Ryan reacted violently. After a few relayed threats, Ryan was able to evade capture by escaping through one of the castles many windows. After leaving the castle grounds, Laney was pursued by royal guards into the inner city, where Laney was once again able to outsmart the guardsponies. After this last brush with the guard, Ryan fled the city limits and was later found lying underneath a tree approximately 1 and 3/7 kilometers away by Applejack Apple, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle. He was then led to Ponyville to meet the other Elements.
I stopped writing and took a small sip of ginger ale and ate a few crackers.
“*Sigh* Black Powder is going to kill me for this being so late. Oh well, back to writing…”
One week earlier…
I walked down the ancient stone corridors of Canterlot Castle, my hoofsteps echoing off the marble floor, sending shivers up my spine. I wondered why Celestia wanted to see me. It wasn't every day, or week, or month, or year, or, well you get the point, she doesn't need psychological help. Maybe it was about Luna, no, couldn't be. She and I met last week for her monthly checkup and our usual game of chess. Damn, she was good at chess. I, the reigning champion for 20 years before her re-harmonization, had lost my title as soon as she decided to challenge me. Apparently, Celestia had convinced a few nobles to gamble on that game, but I determined it wasn't a fair game. I didn't have a millennium of experience under my belt. Oh well. I checked my watch: 0424. Still got six minutes before I need to be in the throne room. I walked over to one of the windows and with a quick burst of dark green magic, gave it the properties of a mirror. I straightened out my dark blue bow-tie, a prize from Luna for "not going easy on her" on our fateful first chess match, which had somehow turned completely vertical. Next, I shook a few hairs out of my eye and straightened out my dark red and orange mane, which was now sporting a few silver strands here and there. Damn, I'm getting old. Well, Ash hasn't gotten his cutie mark yet and Cinder just started first grade, so I can't be too old. After straightening my vest and drying off certain parts of my coat, which had gotten wet from this morning's storm, I proceeded to the throne room. Standing at the door were two solar guards and two night sentinels. Well, I guess Luna is involved. Looking at the solar guards, I noticed something.
"Broadsword, your helmet is crooked." I stated. Quickly, In a flash of bright blue magic, his helmet fixed itself.
"How'd ya know it was me, doc?" The normally stoic stallion asked.
"You always wear it leaning towards your left eye. Anywho, are you still seeing Peace Keeper about your PTSD?"
"Yes-sir-ee, I sure am. Couldn't be here without it." he responded, "well, I guess I should let you in. I'll see you tomorrow for Ash's training."
And with that, he and one of the sentinels opened up the large oak doors leading into the throne room. I entered the grand room to see one of my old students, Twilight Sparkle, sitting at a table with Celestia, Luna, and some strange hairless-ape-thing. Twilight turned around to greet me, but without her usual smile on her face.
"You're 23 seconds late, doctor." she stated coldly.
"Well, somepony sure has the case of the Mondays a bit early." I responded in my cheery manor. That brought a smile to her face.
"Curse your accent, I drives my facial features to betray my emotional state, and, hey! You're the one who disproved that Mondays don't affect your emotions!"
It was true, I did have a Trottingham accent, and I did run an experiment on days of the week and their effects on emotion.
"Ah, it was on;y one experiment, and in order to fully disprove a theory, there must be more. Maybe you should start one."
Our conversation was cut short by the ape-thing clearing its throat. Celestia then spoke up.
"Doctor Corona, I bet you're wondering why we brought you here." She said coolly.
"Yes, and you know very well that I don't like cliffhangers."
"I would like you to meet Mr. Ryan Laney, he is our esteemed guest here in Equestria."
"If I may be so blunt, but what is he?"
"I'm a god-damned human." Came Laney's quick retort.
I turned to him and made a small bow.
"It is very nice to meet you Mr. Laney. I-"
"Mr. Laney was my dad, call me Ryan or don't speak to me." he responded coldly.
"Um... okay, Mr. Ryan."
"Drop the mister part."
"Yes sir, Ryan."
"Don't 'sir' me."
"Okay Ryan, that better? You're starting to sound like my old drill sergeant."
"Good. Military background, I like it. You're not on my list anymore, doc."
"What list?"
"Don't ask." Twilight, Celestia, and Luna all responded at once. Twilight then gave out a nervous chuckle, "I guess I should be taking Ryan back home now, we have been up all night and I need to make sure the treebrairy isn't a smoldering heap."
"But I was just starting to like the good doctor over there." Ryan protested, but was quickly knocked out by a rather overly large blast of Twilight's magic.
She then proceeded to rise, pick up Ryan in a cloud of purple magic and walk towards the exit.
"Goodbye Princesses, goodbye Doctor Corona."
As she exited I heard Broadsword's voice comment: "Where are you going with him"
"Home, and as for why he's a rag-doll, don't ask."
The old doors then slammed shut again, leaving me alone with the princesses. Knowing Celestia's raunchy sense of humor, I quickly commented: "Hrm... I wonder what they did all night." Earning me a good, hearty laugh from both of the Royal sisters, Celestia's face turning bright crimson. After that bout of laughter died down, Celestia decided to have a little fun with me.
"Wouldn't you like to know." she said while waggling her eyes at me.
I had grown immune to her jokes, but apparently Luna had not. She turned bright red and almost choked on a scone. I used a quick bit of magic to pat her on the back and resume the passage of air through her lungs. After a bit of idle chat and more sexual jokes (most of which Luna seemed confused about) Celestia resumed her regal attitude.
"On to the main point doctor, one of my generals, Black Powder, wanted me to have somepony investigate Ryan's mentality."
"And why would he want that?"
"Because I was thinking of giving him a job training some of my and Lulu's guards into a more elite fighting force."
"But why me?"
This time, Luna spoke up.
"Because nopony else is capable of understanding his mind, Ember. He comes from an extremely violent world and has been surrounded by death for a long time. We thought that since you could help me, you had the experience to help him. We understand if you decline this offer, as it would be very trying and would probably push you to-"
"I'll do it."
"Okay then, you will need to report directly to General Black Powder your findings. But understand, Ryan is not a normal patient, he is a friend. We will send a chariot to your apartment at noon, I'll make arrangements for your stay in Ponyville."
"If it's Ponyville, Can I make a special request?"
"Yes, you may."
"Can I bring my son, Ash, with me? He's probably tired of staying cooped up, watching over Cinder while Medley and I work."
"Of course, and good luck, you'll need it."
"Meh, how hard can it be?"
And with that, I left the throne room, unaware of how critically wrong I was.
Well, that's it for now. More to come later. I want everyone reading this to thank All American for...enticing me.
Until next time, Petro!
Trivia time! A. What important event happened in 1066 A.D.?
B. What famous WWII fortification am I referencing to?
After leaving the throne room I checked my watch: 0921. Plenty of time. I trotted over to the guards barracks, where I expected to find General Black Powder. I then realized that I had no idea what he looked like. I turned around to go ask one of the princesses, only to meet a large black stallion gazing down upon me like I was his next meal.
"Why so rushed, doc?" he said in a vaguely familiar rough voice.
"Oh, excuse me. Do you happen to know where general Black Powder is?"
"Hoho, you're, lookin' at 'm, doc!" he responded.
"Oh, I was told to report to you for my report, sir." I hastily said.
"Allrighty then. Let's take this up in my office." he said as he started trotting off towards the general direction of the barracks.
As we walked through the front doors of HQ, we both stopped to take off our hats. General Powder looked me over again, studying me. I met his gaze with equal strength.
"You were in the army."
"Yes, I surely was."
"When did you serve, soldier?"
"During the 2nd Gryphon War, I was there for the siege of Nesteen itself." I responded proudly.
"Really?" he asked, starting to walk off towards one end of the large building.
"Yes sir, I was CO of the 35th engineers corps."
"Wait a second, you were the one..."
"Who figured out 'The Wall'. Don't flatter me general, we're here for official business."
"B-but, you're the reason why I joined, sir!" He blabbered loudly.
I got a few strange looks, and watched a few recruits look at their general in surprise. It seemed as though we were at his office, so I tried to teleport us inside the closed door, but remembered that HQ was a non-magic area when I received a massive headache. Soon enough, a small crowd was surrounding us, sporting questions such as: "who is that?" and "what did the general just say" until somepony who had done his history recognized me and shouted, "It's 'The Breaker'!". IN a sudden upheaval, all the crowd surged forward and grew in size. After having enough, I shouted,
"ENOUGH! ALL OF YOU, AT ATTENTION, NOW" and sure enough, everypony shut up and stood at attention. "Now then, I am here on official business with general Powder and will not tolerate anymore gibber-jabber, is that clear?" I got a collective moan from the group.
"I SAID, IS. THAT. CLEAR."
"YES SIR!" came a chorus reply.
"Good, back to your posts."
As the crowd departed, I heard faint murmur about the rumors of how I broke the gryphon's stronghold. Walking into the general's office, I gave out a long sigh. After Powder closed the door, I spoke up.
"I was hoping I would never have to talk like that ever again. I guess you want to hear the story, don't you?"
"If you would be so kind, sir."
"Enough with the sir, I'm retired. I'll tell you, but business first."
"Yes sir." I looked at him.
"Sorry, force of habit."
"I know that feeling, general. My wife hit me every time I say ma'am to her, and I still do it from time to time."
"Sounds fun. As for the business, I want to know if Ryan Laney is fit for duty as a training officer. I want a report on his mentality done in two weeks. Is that clear?"
"Yes sir."
"Good, now tell me about the war."
"It all happened during the last days of the 2nd Gryphon War, as you should know, we were dug into the mountains outside of Nesteen..."
Deep inside one of the caves perforating the Mountains southwest of Nesteen, what was left of Onyx squad and I were pouring over areal maps of the gryphon capitol, looking for any weak points in "The Wall", a large line of artillery, ground, and areal forces that tore apart any ponies who tried to break through. We only had 3 days left of supplies before we had to use up our reserves.
"I don't know cap'n, I can't see anything, How 'bout you Icy?" Crosswind stated gloomily.
"I'm no joy either. Break?"
"Nothin'. How's a bout you Unity?"
"Well, it does seem to be a little thinner towards the eastern front, but these maps are a week old, for all we know there could be hundreds more of them just waiting there. What do you think captain?" said our only female member.
"Thats it!" I yelled. Pointing towards the northern border of the map I quickly explained, "The tunnels that 12th made! If we use those, we can get right underneath the enemy and tunnel all the way around, set it with explosives, and blow them out of the mountains!"
"No offense, cap, but weren't the tunnels collapsed?" Break asked.
"Yes and no, Break. The entrance was collapsed, the tunnels should be fine! All in?"
"Yes sir!" came my chorus.
"Good. Icy, go tell Diamond, Ruby, and Sapphire. We're leaving at dawn." Icy flew off after a crisp salute. Everyone else, get some shut-eye, tomorrow's gonna be hell."
We all woke up before sunrise to the sight of Icy cooking a grand meal for us. When it was done he said simply,
"Eat up, it might be our last meal."
(Warning: Gore)
A few moments later, the sun rose. We all walked next to each other as we headed towards the atrium of our cave home. After briefing the rest of the squads, we all set off towards our objective. It was a quiet journey, as we knew that I might very well be our last. Arriving at the target, we began to work our way through the fallen rocks, Break and another demo specialist taking the lead. everything was good and steady until we smashed through the final layer, only to find artillery barrels pointed straight towards us. They fired simultaneously, obliterating Ruby and half of Diamond, before anyone could even shout "Contact". Before I could react at seeing my brothers and sisters in arms having been blown to smithereens, Break had already incapacitated one of the cannons and was moving on towards the next one, when the operator began to fire. Crosswind only had time to scream at his brother before the small shield he put up to protect himself shattered, sending shrapnel and a cannonball bigger than his head flying towards him. We watched in horror as Crosswind flew over to the gryphon and, using the gryphon's own sword, cut him down, limb by limb, the gryphon's blood soon covering Crosswind's coat.
Once the adrenaline passed out of our collective system, we took a moment to honor the dead, both our own and the gryphons, for they too were living beings. When we were done, we entered the darkness that was the presumably gryphon-infested cave system. After a few more skirmishes and the loss of a few more good soldiers, we stopped for a breather and to eat some rations. We then resumed out march.
I guessed that we were about one-quarter way in the caves at that point, as we soon came across a massive gryphon armory that was still sending supplies out for their troops. 'I always knew the gryphs had more weapons than the reports said, this is why'. I motioned my squad back.
"Well, this is a nasty turn of events, ain't it, cap'n?" Icy said.
"How are we supposed to take this down? It's bucking huge!" Unity said rather loudly.
We heard her voice echo around the cavern once, before we heard the telltale swoop of wings. All of us took up battle positions along the entrance, expecting the worst. We weren't prepared at all for what happened next. The sound of metal on metal rang through our ears as we turned to see a large, jet-black and red gryphon, the sign of a commando, standing over the body of one of our sentries, the other slumped against the wall, his head slowly rolling in a semi-circular motion. All at once, we attacked, whether using, magic, pure strength, or knives, we all rushed to kill the commando. He easily cut down the rest of Diamond squad and all of Sapphire, only stopping when Crosswind, sliced off one of his wings. He and the commando proceeded to fight in a fast-paced tango, halting the rest of our attacks, as we couldn't afford the collateral of hurting Crosswind. Soon, they were still, locked in a standstill, Crosswind's sword stuck between the commando's twin blades. Unity quickly charged up a spell and fired at the gryphon.
Everything seemed to move in slow-motion. The behemoth gryphon's eye looking at Unity, seeing her spell release. He knocked aside Crosswind's blade and grabbed hold of him. Being used as a shield by the commando, Cross's eyes grew wide as he watched the spell hit him. He screamed out in pain as the spell started turning his body into ashes. The gryphon, without warning, sped towards Unity, first cutting off her horn, then her forelegs, followed by her head. Her mouth was open as if to say 'I'm sorry' as it slowly rolled across the floor. Stopping at Icy's forelegs. I quickly shouted at him to move, but he stayed still. I rushed the massive gryphon in a vain attempt to save Icy, but was swatted aside like a bug by the gryphon. Icy looked me dead in the eyes and smiled, knowing that he would be with the rest of his family soon. I watched in horror as the gryphon slowly walked up to him and stabbed him through the stomach, slowly moving the razor-sharp blade down, gutting him, then throwing his body to the side.
"No." I said coldly, getting up off the floor and stumbling towards him, "This ends now."
"And vhat is little pony going to do?" The behemoth mocked, "Shoot a firecracker at me, like other little pony?"
The beast walked up to me and wrapped a massive claw around my neck. He then started to walk around, me in his claw the entire time.
"I have defeated little pony's friends, and yet you do not break down? You must be heartless pony. You do not mourn your friends?" he turned to face me, "Knowing that it is entirely your fault that they are all dead, knowing that they will go unburied, without respect into the after life. Knowing that you are to blame for the families that will go without sons and fathers?"
"You forgot daughters and mothers too" I squeaked out.
"Vhat? Did little pony say something?" He threw me against the wall of the cave. "I will give you this chance to bury your dead, little pony, to let them die in peace. I do this for you little pony, because no-one must go without proper ritual into the afterlife."
"Thank you, you really are a true warrior." I moved over to my friends lifeless bodies, my horn glowing soft green as I began a spell.
"You are too kind little pony." He said, a confused expression on his face.
"And such a grand warrior deserves an equally grand cremation!" I shouted, turning around. My horn shone brightly, illuminating the cave in it's bright green glow. I then released the powerful fire spell, a signature of the Corona clan, filling the caves with a white hot flame, incinerating the gryphon commando and beginning to melt the solid bedrock surrounding us. A loud crack signaled that the weapons cache had exploded. I began to feed more and more magic into the spell, the heat from the magical fire giving me energy to work with. I lifted my head up and directed the fire to spread all around the cave system, seeing through it's magical properties as it searched through every nook and cranny, killing every gryphon, and melting out the cave ceiling.
Outside the cave, a small hunter-killer party of gryphons noticed a green glow coming from within. One of them flew off to alert his superiors as the rest entered cautiously. The green glow suddenly turned white, followed by the roar of fire as the inferno reached out. There was a loud crack as the caves to the south exploded in a grand flourish of white, red, and orange flame, followed by the rumble of the collapsing ceiling. The lone messenger flew higher to avoid the explosion. He then watched in absolute fear as a large, glowing ring formed around the gryphon stronghold. Suddenly, it exploded in a grand fashion, sending molten rock flying in every direction but down. A river of lava then flowed down into the valley city of Nesteen, covering it in a matter of minutes.
"After the supervolcano I had artificially created cooled down enough, I used some pretty basic mechanics to build a radio and call in a medivac for myself. By the time I was in Canterlot, the peace treaty was signed." I opened up a small patch in my vest, looking at the unpolished medal concealed within. "Later that day I was awarded the Royal Medal of Valor for my actions. I still keep it with me to remind myself of the ponies who died because of my actions." I looked up to see the general with his mouth open, staring at me in awe.
"Now that you know what really happened, write it down. I have to pick up my son. Have a good day general."
Well, now we know about Dr. Corona's past. But what of his future?
We'll find out in the next update of Devil's Due: Canterlot Archives!