Lab Horse: Redux

by TheMajorTechie

First published

A filly lives on Earth with a jobless physicist. She's just figuring out life, while he's going broke. She has no idea what she's doing.

Let's see... how does this work again? Oh, it's already logging? Um... yeah, okay, hi there, whoever you are that's reading this! I'm Gadget, and I live with an old scientist dude who got fired from his job. Also, I'm a small unicorn that has an eerie resemblance to Smurfette.

One day, I hope I can figure out why the heck I look like I came straight out of My Little Pony.

Now, about that. You see, it's kind of a funny story...


Cover art made using Mutter_Butter's rendition of pony Gadget and Momoruuu's drawing of human Gadget/Zoey.
Preread by tsaukpaetra.

Log 1: I is smöl hoers

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'Kay... let's see how this works. Mr. Delmar caved on me bugging him for a tablet, so I guess I could start... actually, I have no idea what I'm saying here. I'ma just treat this thing sorta like a diary, I guess.

...Of course, obviously, I'll be using this device for much more than just being a glorified journal or diary or something.

And why I'm doing this in the first place? I have no idea either. Maybe someday, somebody will stumble across whatever heaping mass of logs I've got on this thing by that time, and decide to risk their sanity to read the daily life of a tiny talkin' pony living with a jobless scientist.

...

...

Ahem. About that, by the way. So, Mr. Delmar really hasn't told me much about my past, or even how I got here. The most I can really manage to drag out of him is that there was something to do with flashy glowing holes in the sky, animal control, and a tranquilizer dart. Also, bribe money.

And... well, I have a pretty good feeling that he's lying to me, but given how I'm just a filly with an eerie resemblance to the characters of a kids' show, I don't think I'd be able to know if he isn't lying. I mean, things are cool and all between us and stuff, but he's just been in this weird, self-deprecating loop for a little while since he lost his job for screwing up an experiment while drunk on the job.

But y'know, things are fine. I think.

Um... oh, did I ever say anything about who I even am yet? Uh, lemme see... oh wait... no, alright... hey this thing has a pretty good mic to catch my mumbling... Yeah, I haven't even introduced myself yet. Alrighty then, let's get right to it then!

First of all, given how mind-numbingly frustrating it would be to type using hooves on an on-screen-keyboard, I'm just recording my logs with the built-in voice recorder app. I'll probably just run it through something and generate a transcript so I don't fill up as much space, but eh. Wait, I'm getting off-topic again, aren't I?

AHEM. Hi, I'm a freaky-deaky tiny talking horse-unicorn-thing named Gadget. I like wearing this little labcoat thingy that Delmar got for me a while back, but lately, I've been wondering a lot about where I came from, and how I even got here.

Did I mention the labcoat? Uh... yeah, I did. Anyways, Mr. Delmar said that he got it from a pet store during Halloween, but then realized the next morning that he didn't have a dog to put it on, so he just stuffed it in the closet until I came around. I have no idea what he sees me as either. On one hand... hoof? Whatever... on one hand, since I can talk and all, he seems to treat me kinda like a daughter. But on the other hand, since I'm a large dog-sized filly, it almost feels like he's completely clueless about what to do with me when we're in public.

And then there's the whole thing with me looking like I came from a kids' show. Like, seriously, take a look at me. Then look at... say, Twilight Sparkle. Sure, I'm a filly and she's a full-grown mare, and our manestyles and colors don't match in any way whatsoever, but from our comically large eyes and tiny muzzle to even the general shape of our horns, it'd be hard not to say that I came from that show somehow. It's just... well, weird to think about, so I try not to think about it too much.

Anyways, I think that should be enough yapping for an introduction to my life. I should probably get on with what I actually did today.

...

Um... let's see... what did I do today? Oh, I went to this cool arcade earlier, and got a big puffy teddy bear from a claw machine! Though, I got a lot of weird looks, being myself and all, and a few kids thought I was a prize that someone left behind. So yeah, obviously being a tiny horse with an uncanny resemblance to Smurfette has its drawbacks.

Now that I think of it though, Mr. Delmar's probably stretching his savings thin trying to let me do what I want, so I could probably hold back on things like this in the future.

...

...

Y'know, I just can't stop myself from constantly bringing up how I'm apparently from a kids' show. Heck, I don't even know how old I am. For all I know, I might've gotten, like, banished here or something. I've seen the backstory for Luna in the show, and I'm pretty sure that it could happen to anyone who ticks off Celestia just a bit too much.

Anyways, back to yapping about my day today. After we came home, I practiced some of my "magic", as the show calls it, by helping Mr. Delmar with some chores. It's really just a bit of basic levitation and stuff, but it still freaks him out sometimes. I mean, have you seen how neurotic he gets when he tries to figure out how my magic works? I'd say that he gives Twilight Sparkle a run for her money on his crazy-face!

After that, I just kinda retreated to my room to screw around with things until now, where I'm finally doing something with the tablet Delmar got me a day or two back. Moving on with future entries, I'll probably just figure out a way to magically input my thoughts and stuff into this thing, and leave the voice recording to... well, voice record.

Idunno.

Y'know, sometimes I feel like there was another me out there at some point. Someone who might've already found out who she was or something, or maybe even went on an adventure or two. Me? I'm personally just in a blanket burrito on my bed, talking mindlessly to a screen that's probably destined to kill my eyes with light while I'm watching a movie or something.

Actually, I think I'm gonna do just that. Not the killing my eyes part. Just the watching a movie part.

Log 2: Extra-Long Horse Pants

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Another day, another... day.

More specifically, a Monday.

Also, you may be wondering how I'm getting this narration of my life in when I'm not even looking at my tablet. Or you might not be. Either way, I'm doing that right now. All it took was memorizing the layout of the on-screen keyboard and quick movements of a levitating stylus tip. I cut off the tip of one of those cheapo capacitive styluses so that I don't end up whacking someone when they look at the weird self-typing tablet thingy.

Anyhow, back to my morning. As I type this, I'm eating breakfast. Nothing says "great day ahead" like good ol' bacon and eggs!

...

Yes, if you're wondering, I do realize that I eat meat. I know, I know, I'm supposed to be an herbivore, but bacon!

And who cares if real-life horses don't (normally) eat meat, anyway? I'm anything but normal in the first place. I'm a freakin' unicorn!

...I might've had to hold back from using an emoji there just for the heck of it. I know exactly where the option to bring up the emoji panel is, and I just had to mentally kick myself to stop moving towards it.

I really should stop going off on tangents like this, shouldn't I?

Anyways, Mr. Delmar just made me breakfast, and he just told me that I've got... "normal clothes" for me to wear to school, even though I'm already covered in horsehair. Literally. Like, y'know that old "Shark Tank" show, where this one time somebody pitched horse pants?

Guess what the "normal clothes" Delmar got me were?

I mean, I already wear the labcoat everywhere I go! What more do I need to wear when I'm a tiny horse?!

Eh, I guess I'll go ahead and wear the horse pants if that's what's gonna let Delmar be happy. First day of school and all, y'know? Gotta have a good impression, and if it means wearing horse pants, I'll wear the horse pants.

I finished my breakfast, floating the dirty plate and fork over to the kitchen sink as I went back to my room to put on my thrice-aforementioned horse pants.

...

...

And oh boy are they stiff.

'Kay then. I guess this'll be my life for today. Wheee.


Y'know, I find it funny how Mr. Delmar thinks it's a good idea for me to take the bus to school. I mean, I've already been taking it for the past couple years, but every single time, today included, I somehow end up finding myself sitting on someone's lap being petted instead of sitting in my own seat. I mean, I'm not bothered by it or anything, and fixing my mane really isn't that much trouble, but at the same time, just like everything else, it's just weird.

Today, in particular, was especially weird. The horse pants are rough on both the inside and outside, and being made for full-grown horses, they're very long and floppy on me, too. That kinda leads into the mess that I'm currently in, with the legs of my pants tangled around the arms of like three other kids.

I'm not sure if I should even take them off, either. Even though I've been wearing nothing but the labcoat all this time, just the idea of pantsing myself in public, on a school bus no less, kinda seems a bit... taboo.

Anyways, we just got off the bus, the four of us still tangled up in my horse pants'(s?) legs. We kinda had to get one of the hall monitors to help untangle us before I could trudge off to class as usual.

But y'know, horse pants!

Short to say, I ended up being the class distraction today just for having such absurdly long pant legs that everyone tripped over in class.

Oh, and I made a new friend as well! His name's Ranell, and he's a student that transferred over from a school on the other side of town!

...How come it feels like I've met him before?

Log 3: School is cool (If it weren't for the fact that I look like the equine embodiment of Smurfette...)

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Voice logging enabled.

Well, I'm not wearing the horse pants today. But on the other hand (hoof?), I still have the trouble of everyone confusing me for Smurfette. Except horse.

So yeah, my unofficial nickname at school is "Smurf Horse".

Anyways, I played with Ranell again today at school. He has to use a wheelchair wherever he goes because of some sort of problem with his muscles, but he showed me some really cool things on his computer!

This morning, he showed me how he was able to connect to the school's new internet-enabled security cameras because nobody changed the password on them, and we saw the principal eating a donut in his room!

"Gadget, come down for your snack!"

Hold on a sec. I think I can still type on this from downstairs. Lemme just turn the voice thingy off...

Voice logging disabled.

So, Mister Delmar is going all like "Gadget, you made a friend at school!" and stuff right now. Like, he's just being all happy saying that it's "about time I got along with people" even though I already get along... though to be fair, every time I got along before led to me being either dressed up like a doll, invited to some waaaaaaay too pink tea party,

I just barely told him that Ranell isn't like most of the other kids because of his disability and what he can and can't do, but that's really not bothering Delmar at all. I guess what matters to him is that I have at least a friend or two at school.

Also, grilled cheese sandwich. Yum.

Whoops, Mr. Delmar must've noticed my spaced-out look while I was concentrating on typing. He just asked me if something was wrong. Abort! Abort!


Welp, I was able to avoid making Delmar any more suspicious that anything was going on. Knowing him, he'd probably blow it all out of proportion or something and end up draining his bank account to fix something that wasn't ever broken.

Sometimes, I wonder if there'll be a day where I finally get the chance to go home. Just, y'know, meet my parents or something. My biological parents. I'm pretty sure at this point that I'm not actually some super-advanced robot, and Delmar (sorry to say this) is kind of a numbskull at times, but still isn't exactly bright enough to ever get close to figuring out how to stuff me into a world that for all we know, doesn't even exist beyond TV.

So yeah.

Incoming message from: Ranell

Oh, I forgot to mention that. Yeah, turns out that Ranell has a cell phone, so we just installed this chatting app since I don't have a cell connection. At least, I don't think I do.

Hey, Gadget. What's up?

Not much. You?

Just watching TV. Anything you wanna do after school tomorrow?

We could maybe see if there's anything we can do on the school computers!

Sure.

Well, I know what I'm gonna do tomorrow now.

Log 4: Hacking the systems... ALL THE SYSTEMS. Actually, we didn't do any hacking but the teacher was showing My Little Pony in class today and--

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I scampered alongside Ranell as we made our way down the hall.

"So... what kinda stuff do you wanna do on the school computers, anyway?"

Ranell shrugged. "'Dunno, what do you feel like doing?"

I thought for a moment.

"Maybe... we could see if we could get past the firewall and play some games on them!"

Ranell shook his head. "That's too easy. All we'd need for that is a VPN. How about snooping around to see what other students have in their accounts?"

This time, I shook my head.

"No, sounds too creepy. We might get in trouble too."

"Yeah, I was thinking that too."

"So what's the point of hacking into the school's systems anyway then?" I snorted, "If everything is too easy or might get us in trouble, then we probably shouldn't do it at all!"

Ranell stopped in front of our class's open door. I bumped into the back of his wheelchair with my face.

"Huh."

"What?" I asked, rubbing my muzzle, "Something interesting in class?"

Ranell wheeled himself through the door. I followed behind, being careful not to smoosh my face again.

"Look, Gadget! The teacher's playing your show!"

I peeked out from behind his wheelchair. Sure enough, I saw Twilight Sparkle on-screen, talking about something to Rainbow Dash. I didn't really pay very much attention to the show though. I was reading a book about outer space for most of that time.

I'm still kinda wondering why our teacher was just playing TV shows all day today in class. We watched Sesame Street afterward, too. It's only the third day of school! Aren't we supposed to be doing stuff like introducing ourselves to the class or something? Maybe a beginning-of-school project? C'mon, we're not kindergarteners anymore! We don't need to be plopped down in front of a TV and babysat by-- oh hey, Bill Nye the Science Guy's on!

Log 5: The maaaaagic of radio!

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"Urk," I grumbled, draped over the side of my bed upside-down, "I'm booooored. Nothing interesting happened at school today and Ranell got sick."

Mister Delmar looked up from his book.

"How about you read something?" he smiled, flashing the cover at me, "It's been a little while since I saw you reading anything lately."

Ack. I honestly would prefer watching TV or something, but there's nothing I like that's on, either. I guess I can find a book... maybe.

Mister Delmar scratched his head, setting his book aside. "Here," he continued, "How about we try building a radio?"

I scrunched my muzzle in the same way I've seen the ponies on TV do it.

"Build a radio? But doesn't that cost money?"

Delmar shrugged. "Eh, yeah, but honestly, the project itself is pretty cheap and I've got some parts laying around that I don't need anyway."

Without another word, he got up and walked out of the room to who-knows-where. He's almost like a real dad! He disappears randomly from time to time and you have absolutely no idea what he's doing! Wowwwww!

... Ahem. So, yeah. I guess we're building a radio then. But... don't they, like, need a dial or something? Or maybe a buncha buttons and a screen to pick stations and show you which one you're on? The screen would definitely be something expensive. I've seen the one in the car of our neighbor. His car has this cool-looking "T" logo on it and instead of having all these knobs and stuff on the dashboard it's just one big humungo screen and--

"Gadget, aren't you coming along?"

Whoops. Well, I guess the tablet's mic caught that for me so that I wouldn't have to type it telepathically. Sheesh, that mic must be sensitive to be able to catch Mister Delmar's voice from all the way over--

"Gadget?"

"Okay, okay!" I shouted back, "I'm coming!"


I stared at the pile of stuff that Mister Delmar laid out on the ol' workbench. A spool of enameled wire, a couple sheets of paper, some little thingy with two leads and a tiny crystal inside (sparkly!) and... aluminum foil?

Oh yeah, also scotch tape and a chunk of cardboard that Delmar probably ripped off of a box or something.

"So then," Mister Delmar began, "Let's see... where to start? Ah! Hold on!"

Without another word, he ran off to grab something. As far as I'm concerned, he might as well go grab a toilet paper roll or something. This stuff here already looks like more than enough to build a radio or whatever thing it is we're gonna make. I'm no genius in hardware myself, but I know from the show that I apparently came from that if it's gonna have a crystal in it, then that crystal's gonna do almost all of the heavy lifting and stuff for the entire machine. Take the Crystal Heart, for example. 'Cause y'know, a single crystal powers an entire freakin' forcefield. Y'know? Yeah.

Hm. Maybe I should charge up the crystal ahead of time before we get started. Probably would save us from the effort of having to find a reliable way to charge the radio up with mana before we use it. After all, what else would it be powered by? Unless Delmar's bringing some batteries with him when he gets back, I don't see how this thing's gonna even work. Maybe he plans on trying to invent some sort of magic-powered radio, and have it all disguised as a fun little project for me or something. Idunno. Anyway, let's see... charge my horn up a bit, be careful about the amount of mana I'm puttin' up there, and now slowly let it flow into the crystal like water... there! Haha, I have no idea how to magic but I still did a magic! I enchanted a crystal!

"Nearly forgot some stuff," Mister Delmar mumbled, dropping an armful of stuff onto the table, "We're gonna need these empty towel tubes to wind the wires around. Unless your idea of a good time is to try and make an inductor without any way to create a decent coil, that is."

Welp. It's not toilet paper, but it's close enough. Who could've known?

Delmar stared down at the crystal thingy, blinking for a couple seconds before picking up the thing and looking at me.

"Gadget? Was this diode glowing before?"

I shrugged. Mister Delmar shrugged too before putting it back down.

"Eh, probably just something in my mind. Anyhow, let's start!"

...I'm just gonna leave out the boring part where we spend like ten minutes making wire go around a tube and then messing up and having to do it again.

"Next, we're gonna build ourselves a variable capacitor," Delmar continued, "Since we're working with stuff we've already got on hand, aluminum foil and paper should do fine. Wrap some foil around that tube first, and I'll make the outer layer that'll slide on top of that to make the capacitor variable. This is how we're gonna be tuning the radio."

Huh. That's interesting. I always thought that there needed to be some kinda fancy dial or buttons or something to tune it. Not--

"The capacitor's basically like the tuning dial on older radios," Delmar continued, wrapping a sheet of paper and another piece of foil over the tube before taping it down, "Or like the internal circuitry that's triggered when you press a button to choose a station. It's obviously a lot more low-tech than either of those, but the goal of this project is just to show you how a basic AM radio works."

He paused for a moment, handing me the finished capacitor... thingy.

"'Kay, now that we've got all our basic parts, it's time to wire it up!" he exclaimed, pulling another length of wire from the spool, "You already know about series and parallel circuits from that other experiment we did a while back, right? The one with the light bulbs?"

I nodded.

"We're gonna connect the inductor and the capacitor in parallel, with the antenna and ground wires kinda sandwiched in-between."

I lit my horn and moved the two parts closer together. Delmar stuck his hand into the aura, guiding the parts as he taped the sanded ends of the enameled wire to the two different pieces of aluminum foil around the tube.

"And now," he continued, taking out the sandpaper again, "for the antenna and ground, we can just sand a spot on the wire off and attach two more pieces of wire."

...So we did that. I'll save you from the boring stuff again.

After that, we basically attached the crystal thingy (apparently it's also polarized) to the foil capacitor doodad, and then we stuck a wire to the other piece of foil on the tube and then wired it up to some old earbuds.

There, I saved another big long scary paragraph of boredom. Now, we can finally test it!


"So why are we stringing up a hugely long wire outside again?" I asked, holding the radio in my magic, "You said something about finding a good spot for the antenna, so why are we hanging wires up outside? I thought we were gonna use some big ol' dish or a pie tin or something."

Mister Delmar shook his head, hanging another piece of wire up on the set of poles we planted. "With how weak the signal is going to be when it passes through this radio, it's best to get the antenna as high up and long as possible."

I pointed a hoof at the shorter pole next to me that didn't have any wire. "What about this one?"

"That's for the ground wire."

Okay.

Delmar wiped his hands off on his pants as he walked back to me.

"There we go, everything's hooked up. Wanna try tuning into something and seeing what there is to listen to?"

I nodded my head as he put an earbud into my obviously-too-big-for-human-ear-products-filly-ear. I kept my eyes on the crystal thingamajig wired up on the radio as I lit my horn, slowly moving the movable foil sheet on the tube capacitor.

...Hmm, I don't really hear anything. Maybe it needs a bit more juice?

I let go of the foil and focused my magic once again on the crystal. Being so small, it probably lost whatever magical charge I had put in it before when we were still building the radio. I'm sure Delmar wouldn't mind, after all. He looks busy on his phone there anyway. Might as well pur a bit more mana into the crystal, then!

I let a surge of magic hurtle through my horn as I directed the energy at the crystal. Immediately, the thing started to glow. Violently. I... might've gone a bit overboard there...

...

...

"Mister Delmar?"

"Hm?"

"Is the antenna supposed to shoot a rainbow laser into the sky?"

He looked up just in time for the crystal thingy to pop, sending out a little wisp of magical smoke.

"...What?"

Log 6: Things get weird!

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So apparently, shooting rainbow lasers into the sky with a homemade radio is not, in fact, normal. Mister Delmar told me that we might have to "lay low" or whatever it's called for a while because we were "obscuring commercial flight paths" and stuff. I'm not sure whether or not he's actually telling the truth though, 'cause from what I'm seeing, it looks like he's using this whole thing as an excuse to stay at home all day instead of trying to go out and do something.

Also, Ranell's still sick, and school's still too boring and easy right now, so I skipped all of that in this log again. At least today's a Friday.

Hm... also, there's a weird sky vortex thing that's starting to form over our house. Wait. Hold on, is that thing a tornado?! Um... lemme check... yeah, it kinda looks the part, but this one's also kinda rainbow colored, and it's just staying in the sky instead of trying to touch down. Is this some kind of freaky deaky tornado thing that's gonna throw me into some sort of Wizard of Oz craziness?!

"Gadget! You want a snack? I grabbed some food while I was getting some groceries!"

Ooh! Food!


Mmm... burger. And fries, too! And it's not tasting like cardboard like the cheap ones do, either!

"Mister Delmar, where'd you get the food from?"

"Lyra's Finger-lickin' Burgers and Fries. Why?"

Hmmm. Lyra? Fingers? I feel like there's some kinda connection with that restaurant and whatever version of Equestria that I come from... Ah, heck, it's probably just a weird coincidence.

Also, why do I hear thunder even though there's no lightning or storm or anything nearby? It's almost like it's all coming from that rainbow tornado thing that's still forming over our house!

...Yeah, okay, I'm gonna admit it right now, I'm actually pretty freaked out. Nevermind the obvious foreshadowing for some even weirder thing (whatever it's gonna be) that's about to happen, but holy heck is that tornado thing getting crazy! Is this really all because of the radio we built yesterday?

I heard some more thunder rumbling as I took another bite of my burger. So that's a thing, I guess. I'm still kinda worried about what's gonna happen with the rainbow tornado thing. Mister Delmar keeps joking that our house is gonna be hit by a giant tomato instead of a giant tornado, but I don't think that's very funny right now.

Hey, I got one of those My Little Pony toys in the bag!

"Thanks Mister Delmar!"

"No problem, Gadget."

I heard a loud zap come from outside as the lights flickered out. Me and Mister Delmar were eating in the dark now.

...I mean Delmar and I. Um... yeah, grammatically correct. Yeah.

Probably should worry more about the fact that the power just got taken out by a random lightning bolt from the big tornado thing then my grammar, though. Ignoring the rainbow tornado, it was supposed to be nice and sunny today!

"Oh, by the way, Gadget," Mister Delmar began, not even bothering to go and check the circuit breakers yet while we were eating, "I put a new diode into the radio we built yesterday. I still don't quite know how the last one blew up like that, especially with such little power being fed into the radio..."

Hm. Probably shouldn't tell him that I overloaded the crystal thingy with mana behind his back. I'll try feeding less into it this time around then.

"Can I go try it out then?" I asked, stuffing the rest of my meal into my mouth, "I'll try not to blow it up this time!"

"Go ahead," Delmar shrugged, "It's your project now. Go crazy."

Oh, and also, I really have no idea how Mister Delmar was able to understand me with my mouth full there. I said something more along the lines of "CA AH GA TWA AITH OUTH THETH?" and "I TWA NO TA BWAO AITH UTH THIF TIE!"

But yeah, I guess I'm gonna go see if the thing works now.

"Oh, by the way, Gadget, it seems pretty stormy outside, so be careful with what you use for an antenna and grounding this time around."

"OKAAAA!" I said back, my mouth still full of a quarter of a hamburger and a couple fries.


Yay! Time to try out the radio again!

I lit my horn, being a lot more careful this time about how much mana I needed to put into the crystal to power the radio. I still can't believe that Mister Delmar didn't put any way to power the thing into the project.

Anyway, now the crystal is faintly glowing with magical energy, and this time it doesn't look like it's gonna break or explode or shoot a laser into the sky or anything. Not gonna risk putting any more in like last time.

I put the earbuds back in and started tuning the radio around to see if there was any good music to listen to.

"...orty-fourth time. Hello there, whoever it is that managed to open an interdimensional line of communication. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I repeat, this is the forty-fourth time I am sending this automated message. I have rigged this spell to alert me if I receive any response. Broadcasting message for the forty-fifth time. Hello there--"

...Holy crap, I think I might've opened a portal to Equestria.

Log 7: Roping everyone I know into this mess!

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"Huh," Mister Delmar mumbled, listening to Twilight's prerecorded broadcast, "Well, that's pretty neat. May as well claim that we've discovered a new universe, but hey, I'm an unemployed physicist with money troubles. What can I do 'bout it?"

He turned and began to walk away before I grabbed his sleeve in my magic.

"Hey, Gadget!" he groaned, stopping, "C'mon, let the old man get himself a drink, will you?"

Aw, fine.

I let go of his sleeve, and he stumbled off somewhere to the kitchen. I wonder if Ranell's feeling better yet?

Let's see... gonna pull up the chat, blah blah blah, pretend like I'm a pro hacker or something while I'm at it just because that's what's cool and makes Delmar think I'm even smarter, blah blah blah...

Oh, hey. What's up?

Just checking up on you. Feeling better yet?

Yeah, though I do have a question.

What?

What was up with that giant rainbow laser from a couple days ago? I live on the other side of town but I saw it coming all the way over from your side. Did you do that?

...

...

...

Yeah.

That's neat. Do you think I could come over today? I wanna see how you did it. Maybe we could, like, make a Batman symbol in the clouds but with something else!

Ooh, like a giant pumpkin?

Maybe. Or what about Mister Delmar's face?

XD That'd be funny!

Anyway, my mom and dad said that I can come over. I'll be there in a few minutes!

Okay!


"So," Ranell began, wheeling himself up next to me, "What made the big rainbow laser thing in the sky?"

"My radio."

Mister Delmar shook his head in the background, muttering something about how that wasn't supposed to happen.

Ranell blinked, staring at the scrapheap of parts that my radio was and then back at me. Radio, me. Radio, me. Delmar, radio, the silly clown man in the storm drain, me.

Wait, what?

"I still don't see how that could work," Ranell mused, leaning forward toward the radio. "Nothing on that radio looks like it's able to even emit visible light in the first place, let alone a super rainbow laser thing."

"Wait, but listen!" I whispered, shoving a hoof over my friend's mouth, "You can hear a message!"

"...naged to open an interdimensional line of communication. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I repeat, this is the seventy-eighth thousand, three hundred sixty-seventh time I am sending this automated message. I have rigged this spell to alert me if I receive any response. Broadcasting message for the seventy-eighth thousand, three hundred sixty-eighth time. Hello the..."

"Huh. That's neat."

"That's what I said!" Delmar called from the front porch.

"Ooh! Ranell, wait for it..."

"Hm?"

"Wait for iiiiiit..."

We both stopped talking and listened to the radio.

"...ree hundred sixty-ninth time..."

"Nice," we both laughed, "We could wait until she hits 420 too!"

"Nah," Ranell shook his head, "Too long of a wait. So, do you think we should try and send a message back?"

I nodded. A lot.

"Ranell!" Mister Delmar called again, "Your mom just called! She almost forgot that you have a dentist appointment today!"

"Tomorrow then," I said to Ranell, "I think it should be pretty easy to send something back since I have my magic and all."

"Yeah."

Log 8: It's tomorrow now and I talked to Twilight Sparkle!

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"C'mon, Ranell!" I squeaked, tugging him closer to the radio. "Let's try and send a message back! You said tomorrow yesterday and now today is tomorrow so let's do it!"

"Okay, okay!" Ranell laughed, "So... how would we start?"

I shrugged. "Maybe I could zap the radio and start talking into it or something!"

"Are you sure that's gonna work? I don't think it's gonna be that easy to turn a radio into a broadcasting station. Especially an interdimensional one."

"Well screw science anyway, we're working with magic!"

Ranell stared at me like I was crazy. Come to think of it, maybe I am. Who knows? Either way, let's get this done! First we'll turn on the thing, and--

"Broadcasting message for the eighty-fifth thousand, five hundred thirty-third time..."

"Well, we know it's still working, at least," Ranell shrugged.

And now let's give it a magical kick!

Don't really know how I could possibly record a video of the radio going kablooie with the rainbow laser or anything again so I'm just gonna describe it here instead.

BOOM! And then there was a big rainbow laser shooting into the sky again!

"Gadget!" Mister Delmar yelled from wherever he was, "I thought I said to try not to make any more rainbow lasers!"

"H-hello?"

We all turned to face the small crater that the radio was now in.

"Hello?" Twilight's voice crackled again, "Is anypony there? The spell alerted me to some kind of message that made it through to me."

"TWILIGHT SPARKLE! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE--" I yelled (probably a little too loudly). "Twilght you wouldn't believe this but I'm actually a filly that's stuck here in a world inhabited by humans but for some reason I'm here and you're there when I probably should be there too and--"

"Woah, woah, slow down, please. I don't need to have Pinkie around to know when somepony's gushing words without end. Could you repeat what you said but slower?"

"My name is Gadget," I began slowly, "I live on a place called Earth. E-A-R-T--"

"I-it's alright if you talk a little faster there, um... Gadget."

"Okay. I'm a unicorn filly that for some reason is living in a world where your world-- Equestria, exists only in a TV show."

"My Little Pony?"

"Yeah, how did you kno-"

"Wild guess. Though, I'm definitely curious: how the buck did you-- ow! Pinkie--"

"CHILD FRIENDLY!" I heard Pinkie yell before giving Twilight another smack.

"Okay, fine. Anyway, how did you even manage to contact me at all? I've been to a human world before, and stuff like this simply don't exist at all!"

"I enchanted a homemade radio and then kicked it with magic."

"What?"

"Yeah. Not like actually kicked kicked it or anything, but you know what I mean."

I looked at Ranell, who flashed a thumbs-up. Mister Delmar looked like he wanted to facepalm but at the same time didn't want to facepalm for some reason. He's funny that way sometimes.

"So Twilight?"

"Yes?"

"Do you think there's ever going to be a way where I could maybe enter Equestria? I don't know anything about myself from before a man named Mister Delmar took me home and raised me. I want to see if I can maybe meet my mom and dad!"

"I could maybe arrange an inquiry for them. Is Gadget the name you had originally?"

"No, Delmar gave me the name because I liked to hang around his tools and sometimes drag them under the couch to mess around with things in secret."

"You fit under a couch."

"Used to. I... don't exactly fit anymore without making a complete mess. Just ask Delmar."

"And this 'Delmar' man, is he friendly?"

"Yeah. You wanna talk to him?"

I'm pretty sure Twilight nodded on the other side of the line 'cause I didn't hear any reply, so I'll just let Delmar talk anyway.

"Uh... hello there, Twilight Sparkle. I am Professor Delma--"

"You're a professor? No wonder Gadget likes to tinker so much! It's great to see that she at least grew up in an educationa--"

"...I'm jobless and just barely above the poverty line."

"Oh."

I think I can say that things just got awkward quick between Delmar and Twilight. Anyway, I think we'll probably just be spending a lot of time talking to her and stuff, so I'm just gonna stop here for today.

Log 9: Portal magic and all that jazz

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So.

Guess who said she's gonna try and open a portal to our world today? Guess! Guess! It's Twilight freakin' Sparkle!

She said after I stopped the log sometime late in the night that she'd be interested in seeing if it was possible to connect me back to my real mom and dad, and maybe even invite Delmar over for a meet and greet sorta thing for raising me all that time even if he was broke and jobless and all that jazz.

...

I'm bored. I'll just cut out this log for a bit until something interesting happens.


So.

Wait, did I already start off the log with that? I think I-- oh, yeah, I did. Let's see then... Twilight said that she's gonna try opening up the portal in a few minutes, Ranell is... somewhere, and Delmar? Delmar I'm pretty sure is napping on the couch right now. So I guess that just leaves me!

I've been waiting for so long for the kind of things I'll probably find out by going to Equestria. Things like how the heck I even got to Earth, stuff like that, y'know? I mean, who knows, maybe the Equestria Twilight's opening up to me isn't even the same Equestria I came from!

Ooh, Twilight's doing something! This little spark of pinkish-purple light is starting to flicker a little right next to where I'm standing outside. I... guess maybe the reason why it can't just show up all at the same time is because it doesn't have a frame like the mirror portal thingy from Equestria Girls? Hold up, is Equestria Girls going to even apply to whatever backstory I've got for why I'm here? Am I actually human?

Holy heck what if I'm human? That'd be the most interesting thing to happen to me in a looooooong time.

"Gadget," I heard Twilight's voice crackle through the (once again rebuilt) radio, "Gadget, what do you see on your side of the portal?"

"Sparkles!"

"...Oh. Alright, let's see if it's possible to force more mana into the spell then. Um, you might want to step back a little. Just in case."

Obviously, I stepped back. A really buzzy sound started coming out of the little light sparkle thing, and then it started to grow. In only a few seconds it was already about as big as my head, and then not long after that it was big enough that I think I might've been able to jump through it!

...

...

I should jump through it.


HOLY HECK I SHOULDN'T HAVE TRIED JUMPING THROUGH IT. WHAT THE HECK ARE ALL THESE FLASHY RAINBOW LIGHTS DOING?! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

"Gadget!"

--AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-huh?

"C'mon, snap out of it!" Delmar dusted off my lab-vest thingy. "Don't go trying to jump into portals while they're still forming! You're lucky you only smacked into the side of it instead of going through!"

...Oh. Well... um... that happened then, I guess. That probably explains the flashy rainbow lights, too.

The portal grew even bigger, and also looked like it was starting to open. I think I can see Twilight waving a hoof at me! Hi, Twilight!

"The portal should be just about stable now!" Twilight shouted through, "I'm not completely sure if you can come through yet or not, but I am sure that you will get here in one piece if you do!"

Great!

I grabbed Delmar in my magic and rushed through because holy crap have I been waiting for this da--

...

...

"What."

Log 10: Hey guys I'm back and I'm not dead!

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I... what? This isn't what I was expecting at all!

"Gadget, can you tell me why I'm a small horse all of a sudden?"

I looked at Delmar. Then I noticed my hand.

...

...

...

"HOLD ON ONE FREAKIN' BIT. DID I JUST STEAL SOME GIRL'S BODY?!"

"Calm down, Gadget," Twilight walked toward me with a clipboard in hoof, staring back at the portal. "The portal works similarly to the mirror portal. It turns people into ponies and vice-versa. Though..." she leaned closer to me. "It is strange to think that it must mean that you were naturally a human here in Equestria. There aren't really very many human families around here."

OOOo-kaay, so I guess that means I'm a human in Equestria. And-OHMYGOSHWHYISMYHAIRBROWNNOWWHATTHEACTUALHECKITHOUGHTIWASBLONDEALLMYLIFEBUTWHAAAAAA--

I heard Delmar trip and fall behind me while I was still freaking out over the hair color change. Now that I think of it though, at least that means that I'm not a smurf horse anymore.

Also, I'm glad that I survived that portal. Who knew where that thing could've led to? For all I know, I could've been spat out into space!

...

...

...Actually, something about that last part feels just a little familiar for some reason.

Eh, not important. Back to freaking out. AAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

"Gadget!"

"Hm?"

"Stop freaking out about your natural hair color!"

Okay.

So anyway, let's get back to business. I... was talking to Twilight!

"--so that could potentially mean that we live in a parallel universe to a different timeline in which you are the daughter of a wealthy but corrupt businessman who sent you away to die, but you didn't, and so you ended up in your world for whatever reason as a pony instead of a human like you are now. And at the same time, that timeline also would have a time when you and your friend there were sent into a derelict space station by your self-built portal instead of travelling through a portal that I opened, and--"

...Okay, so I wasn't talking to Twilight. She was talking to herself. Actually, it looks just like that time when she was trying to figure out Pinkie's Pinkie sense! Ooh, ooh, her mane's starting to get messy!

"--Gadget!" Twilight grabbed me by the shoulders, which actually kinda hurt a little because she had hooves and I was now human. "Gadget, I think I know who you are!"

"Huh?"

"If my guesstimations are correct, then going off my hunch, that means that you--" she pointed her hoof at me, Ace Attorney style "--are in reality Zoey Wayve, daughter of Michael Rowe Wayve, a currently incarcerated former businessman who tried to have you killed by a powerful magus because he wanted a male heir!"

"...The heck are you saying right now, Twilight?"

I turned for a moment to look at Delmar. Sure enough, he was still faceplanted. Probably not used to hooves. Now that I think about it, how come I haven't fallen flat on my face yet?

"Look at me, Gadget!" Twilight pressed my cheeks together in her magic. "You are going to be my greatest discovery in years! It might not necessarily be as science-related as I would've wished, but you are a discovery nonetheless!"

So I guess this world's Twilight isn't the same as the show Twilight, then. Neat.

The next thing I felt was the floor hitting my face. I was wondering when that'd happen.

Log 11: Learning a little about the world and stuff!

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So.

Apparently, this world-- that is, the one I came from, according to Twilight, is home to an Equestria that's got a pretty good amount of technology. Not like computers and all that jazz, but simple things like... uh... well, radios that can communicate across dimensions, I guess.

Still can't quite wrap my head around that idea, but that's beside the point.

...

...

Holy crap, I'm human. Like, this is beyond my ma-- er... hair color. I... I guess you could say I'm an Equestrian Human then. Or something.

Lemme just say this now, but I'm sure glad that the oversized labcoat that I like to wear around is still on my shoulders. Things would've gotten awkward reeeeeal quick if it disappeared.

...

...

I guess I should also say that I'm happy that I'm now spontaneously wearing pants too. They're not even horse pants this time!

ANYWAYS, I should probably get back to narrating things around me and stuff. Unless you want to hear me ramble internally, but yeah.

"--cording to the medical records I could retrieve, it also appears that Zoey has a little sister as well. She was apparently born shortly after her father's crime was discovered, so she's been raised almost entirely by her mother and various nannies and caretakers over the years."

...What did I just tune into? I have a sister?

Twilight looked up from the journal she summoned out of wherever. Delmar was still on the floor. I think he fell asleep.

"By the way, do you want to go by Gadget or Zoey?"

"Both are fine."

"Great!" Twilight shut the journal and lit her horn, picking up Delmar and accidentally shaking him awake in the process. "Do you wanna go meet your family now or do you want to tour Equestria first?"

Hm. Family would definitely be interesting after all this time, but since this Equestria isn't anything like the one on TV, that also sounds like fun. What to choose, what to choose...

"Oh, by the way, Twilight, where's the rest of your friends and stuff?"

Not what I wanted to say! Where'd that question even come from?!

"Friends?" Twilight snorted. "I mean, I guess you could count my study group as my friends, but--"

Oh, so it's one of these Equestrias. Nice, nice, time to get digging! Ooh, this is exciting! I wonder what happened here to make Twilight not have friends?

"--and so I received my cutie mark when Rainbow Dash performed a sonic rainboom. Poor filly, that one-- I've heard that the injuries she sustained from them completely shattered her bones in one wing. Pretty sure it was amputa--"

"Hold up, hold up," I cut in, waving my hands in front of me like I see people sometimes do. "So you're saying that Rainbow Dash did do a sonic rainboom, but she crashed afterwards?"

"Er... yeah. I don't think I mentioned the part about the crash, but--"

"So she's not the Element of Loyalty then."

"Huh?"

"Nothing! What about Fluttershy?"

"Er... she works at Ponyville's general hospital. She's Rainbow Dash's nurse. How did you know her name?"

I wrinkled my brows. (Is that how you say that phrase?) "Well... that means... that means--"

"Rainbow Dash has been in a coma ever since that incident. I only know her because she's the reason why I have a cutie mark in the first place."

Well, that got dark quick.

Log 12: IT GETS DEEEEEEEPERRRRR!

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After all the crazy stuff I found out about yesterday, I honestly think I feel just a little less awkward about the fact that these log entries have turned from a "Pony on Earth" story into a "Human in Equestria" story.

Like, seriously. It wasn't even the little things like who's got what jobs and stuff, either. I'm talkin' Rainbow Dash has been in a coma all her life kinda crap. Really! So does that mean that all the bad guys from all those seasons of My Little Pony just... never happened, or were they defeated some other way? I'll have to ask Twilight about that later. I'm still in my guest room right now 'cause I have no idea what time it is anymore. Come to think of it, is it even tomorrow? Or is today just a continuation of yesterday and this log has become an extension of the previous one? What's even the point of making another one if the previous one was just cut sho--

"Zoey!" Twilight knocked on the door. "Er... I can call you by that name, right?"

"Yeah."

I mean, a name's a name, right? A rose by any other name and all that jazz. Only thing that's really ever irked me was smurf horse.

Twilight opened the door, followed by Spike. Hold on a moment, I haven't seen him until now, have I? ...Lemme see, lemme see... log 9? No... 10? Nope... Not 11, either... huh. Guess he was just busy the entire time. Or something.

Also, Spike's holding a tray of what looks like breakfast, so I'ma guess that that means that it's now morning for whatever insane reason that this universe has to give.

Spike held up the tray, staring back at me without a word. I wonder if he's mute?

I took the tray, making sure to say thank you to Twilight and Spike. Though, based on the chatter about Power Ponies from behind the door after they left, I'm gonna say that he's probably just shy. Now, turning my focus to the food...

Eh, cereal. Didn't expect much anything special anyway.

Wow, I've spent quite a bit of time describing just my morning of thinking about stuff and then getting breakfast, haven't I? Probably should move on to something else at this point.

UHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... geez, am I writing this in the present or the future? Even I can't tell anymore! Did I already ask Twilight about the state of the world yet, or am I about to ask her and write things down as she speaks? I started off these logs writing in past-tense, didn't I? That means that all of this stuff already happened, right? Or... am I just writing as things happen, speaking in past-tense because it's just my natural tone in writing?

Holy crap I'm living in a paradox. What came first? The past-tense story, or the past-tense story? Idunno, haha!

"Zoey?" Twilight opened the door again in the past, the present and the future. "Zoey, are you... are you okay? You seem a little..." she made a face. "...tipsy."

"I have absolutely no idea!"

"Ookaaaay. I'm going to go fetch Delmar. Maybe he knows why you're acting this way."


"Get some sleep, Gadget."

"Aw, but whyyyyyy?"

"You stayed up all night long staring at a wall. You should probably get some rest."

"But it's the morning!"

"I'm saying it, and if I have to, I'll tell Twilight to say it too. Sleep, Gadget."

"Aww, fine."

"Good."

Guess what? I didn't. Guess what I did do?

If you're guessing jump out the window and run around town to explore the world, you are absolutely correct!

Like, for one, it looks like Twilight pulled off a bombtastic Summer Sun Celebration, so Nightmare Moon probably wasn't ever a problem. The explosions probably took care of her, if the statue's little description plate has anything to say about it.

Secondly, apparently we've got Pinkie Pie running an industrial-scale pastry manufacturing and distribution company that's just about on-par with a buncha the ones from Earth in terms of scale. Figures. Though, I might have overheard that the amount of sugar in a single package is enough to keep someone awake for hours longer. Maybe I just accidentally ate one of those or something while I wasn't writing a log. Or something.

Wow, wouldya lookit the speed of that pla--

"ZOEY. BED. NOW." Twilight screeched in my face with a Lovecraftian boom. Just kidding. She landed next to me and sternly pointed a hoof back to her treehouse library thing that did not, in fact, get explodinated by Tirek.

"Hey Twilight, what if I took you to my world?" I grinned. "It's a pretty big place, though. Like, a thousand miles seems pretty far but they've got planes and trains and cars and--"

"I'm just going to stop you right there, Zoey," Twilight sighed, shaking her head as she picked me up with her magic. "Before you cause a copyright issue."

Ok, I might've added that second part in for fun. Gosh, am I bored or am I bored? Ooh, now would actually be a great time to ask about Equestria's history some more! I know that Nightmare Moon probably went boom, so let's move on to big meanie bug queenie!

"Sooooooo... have you ever heard of Queen Chrysalis?"

"Eh, she was a minor annoyance. Queen Celestia banished her a while ba--"

"Wait hold up hold up hold up--" I frantically waved my hands around to make a point in my confusion. "Queen Celestia?"

Twilight raised a brow. "...Yes? I mean, with both her parents dead and gone and her not having married yet, she's the sole ruler of Equestria. Hence the title."

Oh, okay.

"Then who were her parents?"

"Queen Celestia and Prince Blueblood."

I nearly choked at the second name. "Wait, what?"

"Celestia's family has a rich tradition of passing the family name of Celestia through the mother's lineage rather than the father's. I know it might sound a little backwa--"

"No, I'm talkin' about Blueblood! Since when was that douche caboose making googly eyes at old Celestia?"

Twilight made a face. "Do you have an issue with the fallen king?"

Oh wait. I'm still thinking that this Equestria is like the show's Equestria. Probably should stop assuming that before I offend anyone (even more than I might already have).

"No, no, I just..." I shook my head. "Ugh, I should show you what I always thought of when I thought about Equestria. You familiar with DVDs?"

"Dee...Vee...Dees?"

I shrugged. "Video recording method from my world. What do you guys have?"

I blinked. It has come to my attention that I am still floating in the air by the power of Twilight's magic, and we've been talking like this for several minutes now. Seems like Twilight's coming around to notice as well.

She set me down. "Magical projections from enchanted crystals, nothing too advanced. It's a lot simpler than trying to use a spell to recreate an entire scene as an illusion, that's for sure. Now then, to bed with you. You're more scatterbrained than I am when I pull multiple all-nighters!"

Yeah ok so I think I'ma end this log here 'cause Twilicorn here is dragging me to bed whether I like it or not.

Log 13: Let's not speak of the previous log.

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Like, all of it. Forget any of that ever happened, 'kay? 'Kay. Let's just skip on ahead to stuff that happened a day or two after all that happened, 'cause I don't wanna talk about it.

Today, we're bringing Twilight to Earth! After what ha... nope, not talking about it! After stuff happened, she said that we should probably take some time off from learning more about her world, so I said that it'd be a great opportunity for her to explore ours!

...I wonder if she likes hamburgers?

Either way, we got some more portal magic stuff going on. Twilight's got her horn lit, Delmar's still trying not to trip over himself, yadda yadda, sparky sparkly flash boom!

And there we go! Twilight made another portal thingy! Though, she looks like she's having a really hard time keeping the spell open.

"Go on through!" she shouted, "I'll follow when the portal's stable! Wait-- no, don't go through yet! It's not stable!"

Alrighty then. That's a 180 if I've ever seen one.

A few minutes later after Twilight got the portal stabilized, we just hopped straight through without any trouble. Nothing flashy, or weird, or anything like that. It's basically like walking through a door that switches your species. Which now that I think of it, is actually still pretty darn weird.

Come to think of it, now that I'm back to my little ol' lab horse self and Delmar's back on his feet in a very literal way, why is Twilight still a pony? Isn't she supposed to turn into a teenage girl with purple skin or something like she did in the Equestria Girls series? Honestly, I don't get why some of this stuff happens sometimes.

"So," Twilight lit her horn, pulling out a Twilight-grade list on a scroll. Which honestly was kinda funny to see given how small both she and I are compared to everything else 'round here. "First order of business, what system of government does the country you live in have?"

Oh no. She started with the boring questions. Skip!


Yeah, that skip was completely unneeded apparently. She stopped after the seventh question about boring stuff like weather and things... and stuff.

Stuff aside, now we're getting some more interesting things! Like when she asked about who raises the sun. Boy was she surprised when we told her nobody! Mister Delmar even looked at her like she was stupid! I call it his "did a rock hit you in the face?" look.

"So, moving onto food."

Oh boy.

"We eat meat!" I grinned, showing off my teeth just like I used to do to Delmar after I brushed my teeth. "Do you like hamburgers, Twilight? 'Cause I like them!"

Twilight cringed a little. She probably wasn't expecting that. "Er... I do understand why you would eat meat, Zoey, but I'm mostly asking Mister Delmar beside you. I'm guessing that humans here have a similar diet to those that live in my world?"

"Omnivorous?" Delmar added.

Twilight nodded. "Yes. I assume you are omnivorous?

"Ehhh, more or less," he shrugged. "Personally, I go vegetarian every couple of weeks. Helps keep my weight down, y'know?"

"Makes sense. And what about the ponies that live here?"

"Vegetarian, though I have heard that some horses and cows are known to occasionally trample small animals and eat them."

Wait, what? Horses do that?

Twilight wrote some stuff down on a second scroll she had for notes, nodding. "And are you aware of any conflicts between this world's ponies and humans?"

Mister Delmar snorted. "Conflicts? Honestly, the biggest conflict I've ever known of regarding equines was a bar tussle some folks I knew once got in while betting over a horse race on TV."

"Mm-hmm, so, Mister Delmar, I'm guessing that 'horse' is the common term your world uses for ponies, then?"

Hm. We've got a bit of a misunderstanding from the looks of it.

"What? No-- horses and ponies are two different things. The ponies here are usually at least twice the size of Gadget here, while horses often are taller than us people!"

Twilight raised a brow, but didn't say anything because she was focusing on writing still. It'd be funny if she later turned the scroll around and it turned out that she was just doodling on the thing.

"Here, Twilight, would you like for me to just show you a horse?"

Huh? Oh, I must've spaced out a little and missed something just then. Twilight's already stopped writing and is following Delmar.

Mister Delmar pulled out his old laptop and opened it up, typing in his password. I'm guessing Twilight's never really seen such a thing before, 'cause she's looking like she really, really wants to start machine-gunning questions about the laptop at Delmar.

"This," Delmar turned around the laptop to show off what I'd honestly have to say is an absolutely 100% terrible stock image of a horse. "...is a horse."

Twilight made a face. "A horse in your world is a motion-blurred rectangle with legs?"

Delmar blinked, turning the laptop back around again. He probably accidentally switched the image then if he's gonna look as embarrassed as he does right now.

"There. This is a horse," he turned it around again, this time forcing a very funny face. It looked like he was trying to hide that he farted or something like that.

"Are they sapient?"

"Not that we know of," Delmar reached down and ruffled my mane. "Except for little Gadget here. She used to be my lab assistant before I lost my job."

"And everyone called me lab horse!" I added, "Though, that was after they stopped freaking out."

"To be fair, you were the one that started shooting lasers at people when I first brought you i--hey, ow!"

I stuck my tongue out at him while he waved his finger in the air. It was only a tiny nibble this time! Why'd he have to be so dramatic about it? It's not like that one time when he was feeding me a carrot when I chomped a finger on accident!

Actually, now that I think of it, why did people stop freaking out around me?

Eh, who cares? I'm here and that's that... and Twilight has finally gotten back to the boring questions. This time she's talking about horse anatomy and-- hey, she's not talking about stuff I should be heeeeaaaar-iiiinnnng!

Log 14: I'm not dead! Also, more stuff happened. I think.

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Haha, so. Some stuff happened while I took a loooong break from these logs! Twilight accidentally casted a spell that froze everyone in place for like three or four months while we were in the human world, but don't worry, she fixed it! I think.

"Twilight! Why am I a horse again?" Delmar shouted behind me. Oops, guess there's still some stuff to work out.

But anyway, once Delmar's turned back into a people person, we're gonna go back to Equestria! Come to think of it, would Equestria also have been frozen during that time, or did they continue on as usual without us? Would they be worried that Twilight was gone for like a quarter of a year?

...

...

Welp, I don't see any ponies pouring out of the portal looking for Twilight yet, so I guess we're fine!

Twilight turned Delmar back into a human without any trouble. Seems like she's used to it, apparently. So anyways, we hopped on through the portal again! I have absolutely no idea what it was that we were planning to do before all of us got frozen in time and stuff, but I think we're supposed to be meeting Celestia or something.

"C'mon, Zoey. I'd say now's as good a time as any to introduce you to the Queen. Given your... uh, background, I think she'd be willing to make some time in her schedule to talk."

Another point to me! I sure wish I kept track, though.

Anyway, we're off to Equestria! Again!

Mister Delmar groaned in annoyance at the fact that he went from pony to human back to pony again in under five minutes. I, on the other hand, get to be in my original form! Actually, that kinda sounds weird when I put it that way, but eh. The point of these logs is to be brutally honest with whatever I happen to have on my mind, anyway.

Me and Delmar followed close behind Twilight for a while. We weren't that far from the throne room, luckily, so that meant I only had to trip three times! Mister Delmar's not so lucky, though. He has scuff marks on his face.

And here we are! The throne room!

...

...

...This is a throne room? Ew. Tacky. And this is coming from some kid who was a little blue horse only minutes ago! Wait, that's not what tacky means, is it? This room is tacky,but am I tacky?

Eh. Not important. What is important is the fact that I've been spacing out this entire tim--

"Zoey, are you ever gonna put away that tablet?" Delmar deadpanned. "I know you enjoy narrating every moment of your waking life and all, but you really need to pay more attention to what's going o--oh, you're narrating me right now, aren't you?"

Yup, I sure am. Also, yeah. Been carrying this thing around since I can't just type with m a g i c and stuff like I normally do as a pony.

Twilight bowed to Celestia. "Your highness, I've brought the girl."

Oh, so I'm just the girl now, am I? Sounds mysterious.

Celestia raised a brow. "The one that you suspect went missing all those years ago?"

Man, this whole scene reeks of awkwardness. Guess nobody in here's got any real social skills, huh?

"Gadget!" Delmar scolded again, "You can type later. Don't you want to hear what the tall one has to say?"

Why yes, I'll gladly take the opportunity to scene-transition out of this mess.


Welp, I guess it's time for a recap. Let's see... Celly and Twi had this long, boring conversation about whether I should be granted citizenship here or not based on both my disappearance and my experience on Earth. Mister Delmar may or may not have fallen asleep during that same conversation, even though he told me to pay attention... oh, and Twilight's kinda interested now in my magical abilities as a human for whatever reason, too.

Uh... what else was there? Oh-- Celestia mentioned that she'd be willing to introduce me to my estranged family, too. She said that she did something similar with Rainbow Dash when she finally woke up from her coma. Apparently, RD's got a cool lookin' metal wing like the one she had in one of the alternate universes that Starlight made when she broke time.

...Hold on just a sec, does that mean we're living in that alternate universe? How long is it gonna be until the war? Or... hm... I know that there's no Luna in this world... was there a Luna in that AU? I don't remember exactly at the moment. Guess we'll cross that bridge when we get to it, then.

But anyway, Delmar and I are having lunch with Twilight. Turns out, they've got chicken nuggets here! Granted, it's normally something reserved to visiting creatures that normally eat meat, and of course also humans. I do remember reading somewhere that both cows and horses in real life sometimes trample and eat small animals, though. Either way, Twilight's looking at me funny while I dip a nug in my sweet and sour sauce while typing with my free hand. I think I'll just end this log off here for now before I spill something on my tablet.

Log 15: Mister Microwave

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Today's the daaaaay! The birds are singing, the sun is shining, the tank is clean and there's not a cloud in the sky!

...

...

Ha. What a day to say hi to the hecker that decided that I should be thrown out of this plane of existence. Fun!

So.

Uh... yeah. Today's the day that I'm gonna go meet my estranged dad. Obviously, he's still in prison and all for what he's done, but I guess it's basically now or never. I'll cut back on the boring bits.


Well, that was a pretty uneventful walk. So anyway, we're here at the jail place now. Honestly, I was kinda expecting it to be a little bit more like a dungeon or something, but eh. That's the show Equestria.

"Sooo..." I looked at Twilight. "Are we gonna go in now, or what?"

"Yeah."

"What are we waiting for, then?" I pushed her big ol' horse butt in. "I wanna see my evil dad and see if he really is evil or something!"


Man, I really do love my scene skips, don't I? Granted, we did have to wait a bit while Twilight did the paperwork and stuff to let us in for a visit. Now we can finally pay the dude a visit!

We went into the actual prison side of the jail after the paperwork was done. Twilight said that my dad's in the "maximum security" part because of how dangerous he is, apparently. It wasn't too long of a walk though before we finally got there.

Though, from what I can see, to be honest, he really doesn't look all that dangerous at all. Guess that just proves that looks aren't everything, huh?

Mister Microwave glared back at me. He really hates my guts, doesn't he?

"You shouldn't be here."

I looked up from my tablet. My dad was still glaring at me.

"I ordered you gone, and now you're back. Are you here to gloat? To see the man behind the bars who wanted you banished?"

"Er... yes... maybe?" I made a face. He really wasn't making this any easier. "I'm really only here out of curiosity, actually. See who the heck it was that sent me barreling into another world as a lil' unicorn."

Mike snorted, folding his arms. He closed his eyes. For a moment, he actually looked like he'd be able to pass as some random guy that I might've passed back on Earth. Minus the prison jumpsuit, of course.

"Is that all for now, Zoey?" Twilight stepped up beside me. "It doesn't seem like Michael here is willing to say another word to you, anyway."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Hmf. Good riddance," my 'dad' grumbled after Twilight said that. Why's he so against me existing? I think I remember that he wanted a son and all, but wow. His pettiness is out of this world!

So anyway that's pretty much it for this log. I'm writing out this last part in bed now 'cause I took a break after leaving the prison with Twilight and Delmar. Don't really know what we're gonna do next.