> The Opening Band
>  by Coyote de La Mancha
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Pure Mayhem
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Man, who are these guys?” Skootaloo wondered.
“Beats me,” Sunrise shrugged. “I mean, they’re really retro to open for Black Rainbow. But you have to admit, they’re really tight.”
“Yeah,” Apple Bloom agreed, twirling with Sweetie Belle. “An’ that sax player can make his horn talk!”





Meanwhile, on stage, the band conversed beneath the cheers. The bass player, a violet stallion with red-orange mane and black tea shades, grinned from beneath his huge moustache. 
“Man, this has got to be the craziest place we have ever done.” He paused, then added, “Well, excepting maybe that San Francisco gig.”
“And yet, what could we potentially expect from a manager such as ours?” Their keyboardist, also their main vocalist, regarded them all. A crimson-bearded unicorn, his grin threatened to split his face in two. “You must confess, it has never been dull since we agreed to try him out.”
“Oh, wow, fer sher, it’s been pretty wild, man,” nodded the pegasus guitarist from beneath her amber mane. “But I can dig it, man. I mean, like, this is a seriously happenin’ gig, y’know?”
“And Animal sure gets into the place,” chuckled the bassist.
“Po-nees!” yelled the crimson drummer as he stared excitedly in all directions. “Po-nees! Po-nees! Po-nees!”
“Okay, looks like it’s about wrap-up time,” the keyboardist grinned, the light gleaming off his trademark golden tooth. “Zoot, you ready?”
The saxophonist, a blue-on-blue earth pony, nodded. The gig was good, the time was now.
“Ready when you are Doc, fer sher, man,” agreed Janice. She readied her guitar, unfamiliar wings flexing involuntarily. “Floyd?”
“Born ready, Janice.” The bassist surveyed the crowd, nodding to himself. “Okay, troops,” he said, readying himself beside her. “Let’s blow a few minds.”
Animal grabbed his sticks. “Blow minds! Blow Minds!”
“Right!” Doctor Teeth cried out, hooves on his keyboard. “Two, three, four!”
In almost no time, the crowd was throwing themselves into the spirit of the piece as much as the band was. Far too soon, the band reached the last refrain. 
“Can you picture that?” They sang. “Can you picture that?”
“CAN YOU PICTURE THAT!” the crowd roared.
There was a great and powerful explosion of fire and light that consumed the stage. When it cleared, the band, their instruments, even the set pieces, were simply gone. There was a heartbeat of silence, and the crowd burst into cheers and applause.





Hours later, the after-party was over, and the opening act was just about ready to head out. There were no roadies to worry about. The band always travelled light and took care of their own instruments. And the sets…
Well, the sets had become irrelevant as soon as their manager appeared in a flash of white light. He took a moment to gaze at them all with a mad grin before speaking.
“Well?” he asked. “Did I lie?”
“Well, my crazy-quilt-like compatriot, I gotta tell ya,” Doctor Teeth said fondly, “when you first approached us, we all figured you were just a hustler with a terrific pitch.
“But since then,” he went on, “you’ve shown that, come what may, you’re not only a hustler with a terrific pitch, but you can back up every line you play. And that, without a shade of a doubt, is the best kind of hustler there is.” 
He and the rest of the band chuckled, nodding to one another. Then he turned back to the creature before them. “So, if you still want us, baby, you got us.”
Discord reared back in his excitement, grinning. “Oooo! You know, I’m so glad you feel that way. Because I already took the liberty of scheduling your next performance. If you’re ready to go, that is.”
“No life like the road, man,” Floyd nodded. “What’s the gig?”
Discord’s visage took on a cunning leer as he appraised them all anew. “How do you feel about starships?”
“Oh, wow, man,” Janice exclaimed. “Like, I used to romp with them back when we were all just starting out. Seeing them again would be, like, so amazing, you know? And I could totally catch up with Grace, and Paul, and Jack, and…”
“Um, different starship, I’m afraid,” Discord interrupted, looking upward. 
“Oh,” Janice sighed.
“No reason to be despondent, my dear,” the draconequus assured her. “I might be able to work something out later. But for now, let’s just say I have connections along a variety of fences, and that these few stops have only been the tip of the iceberg. If you’re all in?”
“All in!’ Animal shouted. “All in! All in!”
Zoot nodded, chill as always.
“Well then, that makes it unanimous,” Discord raised his claw—
“Hey, wait a minute, man!” Floyd exclaimed. “What about our Grand Mistress of Industrial Light and Magic?”
“Indeed, Floyd Pepper is correct,” Teeth agreed in his gravelly voice. “It would be completely improper for us to carry on without Her Great and Powerfulness.”
Janice nodded. “Oh, fer sher, like, she’s one of us, now, totally.”
“One of us!” the drummer roared. “One of us! One of us!”
Discord raised an eyebrow at the unicorn in question, where she still stood in the shadows. “Well, that sounds like an invitation. What do you say, my dear? Care to go on a tour of endless adventure?”
The lady of mystery considered for a moment, then stepped forward into the light. 
“Since the Electric Mayhem have acknowledged the prowess of the Great and Powerful Trixie,” she pronounced, “Trixie shall agree to continue the tour with them.”
There was a mass of cheers and congratulations and back-patting, accompanied by a small explosion when the drummer got a little too grabby. He flew perhaps ten feet, landing in a disheveled heap.
“Sor-reee,” he managed from where he lay, smoking and singed.
While the rest of the stallions chuckled, the pegasus mare nodded to her new friend, saying, “Don’t worry, man, like, he’ll learn, fer sher.”
The cloaked unicorn shrugged, unconcerned. “Either way. Trixie has explosions for days.”
While Animal stared at her with a mix of horror and awe, Discord rubbed his paw and claw together with glee. “Oh, I do love where this is going! Alright, everypony. Ready or not, next stop: Ten Forward.”
Grinning manically, he snapped his claw. There was a burst of light, and they were gone.