I Didn't Sign Up For This

by Cillerenda

First published

It's the night after Nightmare Moon's defeat and the second attempt at the celebration, and Applejack's done a lot of thinking.

“I ain’t just a farmer anymore and you ain’t just a fashion designer anymore. Now we’ve got new titles.” She placed a hoof on her chest. “Element of Honesty...” -- she moved her hoof to Rarity -- “and Element of Generosity. Saviors of Equestria and whatnot.”


When Applejack was a filly, she'd been told a hundred times by her parents that she was special. This... this isn't what she expected.

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Sugarcube Corner was positively buzzing with life, hardly surprising considering the occasion. Nightmare Moon had been defeated and the Princess of the Night had been returned to her subjects. Many still lingered warily around the reformed royal, but the atmosphere had felt relatively lax. The second attempt at the Summer Sun Celebration had gone off without a hitch and Ponyville was more alive than it had been in years.

Rarity was certainly enjoying herself, sipping a glass of lemonade and listening to her friends talk amongst themselves. They were all interesting characters, that was for sure, and that made her feel even more guilty about never attempting to befriend them before just a few months ago. Rainbow Dash had seemed too crass, Pinkie Pie too exuberant. She had tried speaking to Fluttershy in the past but the poor dear could barely speak her name. Twilight Sparkle, though only being her friend for a night and some change, was certainly a pony she enjoyed watching-- the mare was so lost inside her own head at times that it often made for interesting scenarios for Rarity to watch play out.

The only one of them that Rarity had really known for years now was Applejack, and even that was a stretch in saying so; she had known her in school but never really made an attempt at talking to her. She was a tad intimidating to Rarity, and not just in stature. Rarity had thought of herself as being good at reading ponies, but Applejack eluded her. She could never tell just what was happening in her mind, her thoughts and ideas. She was a boisterous and social pony, yet introverted and reserved. After befriending the mare, she noticed that Applejack never liked to talk too much about herself, preferring to let others carry on.

Speaking of Applejack… where was she?

Rarity set down her drink and scanned the room for some sign of the Earth pony, but her search came up fruitless. She could see no brown Stetson surfing the sea of heads, nor a long blonde tail trailing behind. Rarity frowned; there was that juxtaposition that eluded her. Applejack had seemed to have been everywhere at once earlier that day, only to practically disappear so soon after. It didn’t sit right with her, not after everything that had happened.

Her worried glances caught Twilight’s eye and the royal student’s smile turned to a frown. “Rarity? You okay?”

“Fine, dear,” Rarity assured her with a small smile. “I’m just curious as to where in Equestria Applejack has run off to. You would think she’d be here with us.”

“Maybe she’s taking a nap?” Rainbow Dash suggested with a lazy wave of her hoof. “That pony works too much, and after the rush she had to go through to get food ready for another Summer Sun Celebration with only a few hours notice, I wouldn’t blame her if she hit the hay.”

Rainbow Dash had a point, Rarity admitted quietly to herself. Applejack worked herself exhausted most days, evident in how her voice would falter when making a sale or the near permanent dark circles under her eyes. Still, this was Applejack they were discussing, which meant---

“I don’t think Applejack would just leave without saying something to us,” Twilight pointed out. “She seems to be a pony who takes the feelings of others into account.”

-- well, yes. What Twilight said was true, though Rarity was thinking more along the lines of Applejack’s admirable -- if a little over-the-top -- work ethic. Catering the Summer Sun Celebration was fun, but a job nonetheless, and Applejack was too good a business mare to simply walk away before the event even came to an end. No matter the reason for it, Applejack’s disappearance was concerning, and Rarity would get to the bottom of it.

“When was the last time you all saw her?” Rarity asked the the group.

“I was helping her bake some treats in the Cakes’ kitchen a couple of hours before the celebration started,” Pinkie Pie said around a mouthful of frosting, “But I had to leave her when BonBon came in with these super duper delicious new candies she’d made and I just couldn't resist asking her to show me how to make some and--”

“Okay thank you, darling,” Rarity interrupted with a gentle touch to Pinkie’s hoof. As much as Rarity was interested to know BonBon’s response to Pinkie Pie unknowingly trying to steal a recipe for her business, this had nothing to do with her main objective.

“I remember seeing her earlier,” murmured Fluttershy, barely audible over the noise of the party. “She looked really stressed, like something was on her mind.”

Rarity frowned. “How long ago?”

“I’m not sure,” Fluttershy replied, ears going flat. “M-maybe half an hour before we sat down here? I asked her if she was okay but I don’t think she heard me--”

“Shocker,” muttered Rainbow Dash

“-- and she headed upstairs.”

Twilight cocked an eyebrow. “Upstairs? For what?”

“Oh, I know!” Pinkie chirped. “Sugarcube Corner has a balcony. The view from there at night is super pretty, that’s where I’d go if I were feeling stressed!”

“Makes sense,” Twilight decided, levitating her own drink to her mouth. “I hope she’s okay.”

“I thought after everything that’s happened she’d be more open to talking to us,” Fluttershy muttered with a concerned frown.

“I’ll go up and see if I can find her,” Rarity offered with a glance toward the stairs. There was no light shining down indicating anyone was up there, but it was worth a peek. If Applejack was feeling stressed about more than catering, Rarity needed to find a way to help her.

“Good idea,” Twilight said with a nod. “Let us know how it goes.”

It was a short journey up the stairs to the second floor of the bakery and Rarity couldn’t help but feel as if she was poking her nose where it didn’t belong. Anypony and their mother was allowed downstairs to sample the Cakes’ delicious creations but up here was more private, almost intimate. Pinkie Pie and the Cakes lived here and Rarity felt her morals being pressed just by ascending the staircase into their privacy. Still, she was on a mission and these thoughts could wait until later.

A cool breeze coming down a short, photo-littered hallway caught her attention and she turned to look. At the end was bright pink door about half open, moonlight filtering in and giving the wood floors a hint of illumination. Well, if Sugarcube Corner did indeed have a balcony, Rarity was pretty sure she had found it.

At last the missing farmer was found as Rarity fully opened the door. She was leaning against the railing, forehooves thrown over the side and crossed with her green eyes to the sky. Rarity made her way over as silently as possible, almost as if she were approaching a skittish creature who would dash away at any second. After a moment she reared up to mirror Applejack’s pose, following her gaze to the moon. A long beat of silence passed before one of them spoke.

“The party is downstairs, you know,” Rarity said, keeping her voice light and casual.

Applejack didn’t answer right away, keeping her eyes on the moon. Her chest heaved with a heavy sigh. “The moon looks strange without another pony starin’ back at ya, doesn’t it?”

The response was so out of the blue, so not Applejack that it caught Rarity off guard for a second. Before Rarity could wrack her brain for an answer, Applejack continued.

“When we were little and learnin’ about Nightmare Moon in school, I remember thinkin’ about how silly of a story it was. A mare in the moon!” Applejack scoffed. She lowered her gaze and stared across the darkening town. “But then tonight happened and the story was real. For a thousand years Princess Luna was stranded and isolated on the moon. She was there for so long that she faded into nothing but a story for foals. Isn’t that sad? That her life, her legacy, everything she was and everything she did was forgotten by everypony but the one who did it to her?”

“Applejack, what are you talking about?’ Rarity asked, turning to look at Applejack fully. She barely stifled a gasp that threatened to burst when she saw tears in her friend’s eyes. Applejack… Applejack didn’t cry.

“I was a farmer yesterday, Rarity.” Applejack said, voice eerily calm.

“You still are, dear. Nothing has changed.”

“Nothing has changed?” Applejack repeated, turning to look at Rarity with darkening eyes. “Rarity, everything has changed! We discovered relics that had been lost for a thousand years, relics that chose us, chose me! We were the guests of honor at a banquet thrown in Canterlot, our faces are forever in the windows of that palace for Celestia’s sake!”

Although Applejack had kept her voice relatively calm, it did nothing to ease Rarity’s worry. “Well of course, Applejack,” Rarity said, feeling a bit defensive, “we helped save Equestria, did you expect that to go unnoticed?”

“I just--” Applejack cut herself off and turned away, taking a deep breath. A moment of cold silence passed between them, rivaled only by the unusually cool summer breeze. Rarity sighed and put what she hoped to be a comforting hoof on Applejack’s shoulder.

“Applejack,” Rarity began, “just mere hours ago you were chosen by unknown forces to be the bearer of the Element of Honesty. I need you to uphold that title to me, right here and right now. Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

With a droop of her shoulders, Applejack hesitantly turned to face her, head low so her hat covered her eyes. “Fine,” she decided. “I’m… scared.”

“Of what, dear?”

“Of… this,” she said, gesturing vaguely to herself and Rarity. “I ain’t just a farmer anymore and you ain’t just a fashion designer anymore. Now we’ve got new titles.” She placed a hoof on her chest. “Element of Honesty...” -- she moved her hoof to Rarity -- “and Element of Generosity. Saviors of Equestria and whatnot.”

“Yes…” Rarity said slowly. “I am not seeing your point here.”

“What I’m sayin’ is that we ain’t superheroes. We’re just normal ponies. Sure we succeeded tonight, but there will come a time when our luck runs out, Rarity, and Equestria really won’t be the same when it does.” Applejack let out a stuttering breath, staring across the town again. “And it’ll be my-- our fault.”

“Applejack…”

“That’s a thought I just can’t bear, Rarity!” she exclaimed. “After what we did tonight, we’ve got a lot of expectations to meet. The whole of Equestria is gonna be countin’ on us to defeat whatever comes next. The Mare in the Moon came to life yesterday, who’s to say that another fairytale won’t tomorrow?”

“If that happens, dear, we’ll be ready,” Rarity insisted.

“You don’t know that.”

“And neither do you.”

Applejack was quiet for a moment, hopping off the railing and sitting down. She looked at the moon again and spoke, her voice barely above a whisper, “You’re right. I don’t know.” She looked at Rarity again and the Unicorn was nearly swept away by the intensity of her gaze. “And that is what scares me more than anything.”

“Not…” Rarity paused, sitting down to meet her friend’s eyes steadily. “Not knowing? That’s what scares you?”

Applejack nodded and finally, Rarity understood, but she held her tongue.

“My future has been spelled out for me from the moment these apples appeared on my flank,” Applejack said. “I knew then and there that I would work the farm and do my best for my family. Everything was so simple, so… written out. I always knew the gist of it all.”

“Until today,” Rarity finished, and Applejack nodded again.

“Now?” Applejack gave a huff of laughter, dry and humorless. “I don’t know what’s gonna happen from here on out. What new villain I’ll have to fight, if I’ll win or lose, if I’ll let everypony down or just raise their expectations. I don’t like not knowin’ and not havin’ control over it.”

“Well… I guess now you’re stuck living like the rest of us,” Rarity said slowly.

“What?”

“You think I had any idea where my life was going to end up?" Rarity asked with a smirk. “Please. When my horn started dragging me to the other end of Equestria, I hadn’t the slightest clue of where I would end up, and I certainly never thought I’d defeat some magical villain from a storybook. I doubt the others did either.”

“I know, I ain’t tryin’ to say ‘oh woe is me’, y’know.” Applejack rolled her eyes. “That’s more your style.”

Under other circumstances, Rarity would have been taken aback but right then she was just happy to hear Applejack’s deadpan humor again. She waved a hoof dismissively. “Whatever, I get what you’re saying. I know it’s an Apple thing to, well, be an Apple. Work the farm and harvest. But did you really expect that it would last forever? That every Apple would just… fall into line?”

“Well… no,” Applejack admitted, turning her eyes to the floor of the balcony. “I just thought that, when it happened, it’d be from somepony more notable than me.”

Rarity frowned and touched a hoof to Applejack’s chin, raising her eyes back to hers. “Hey, I happen to think you are more than notable.” She moved her hoof to Applejack’s neck, the spot where the Element had not long ago. “And apparently so does some unknown force of friendship.”

Applejack blushed and pushed Rarity’s hoof away. “Alright, alright, don’t get sappy. S’bad enough I spilled my guts and got all emotional in front of you.”

“Oh, please. If I can trust you enough to break into hysterics while falling onto a fainting couch in your presence, I think you can trust me enough to let out a tear now and then.”

Applejack chuckled, getting to her hooves and helping Rarity get to hers. “Makes sense, I guess.”

“Oh and another thing, dear.”

“Hm?”

Rarity turned to face Applejack directly, locking eyes once again. “If and only if the time ever comes where we fail, we fail together. No beating yourself up, no dwelling on letting others down. Deal?”

“I can’t promise that.”

Rarity scoffed. “At least you’re being honest. Well try, then?”

“... deal.”