Wrong Room

by Flint-Lock

First published

Twilight catches Celestia and Queen Novo being...intimate. Things get awkward. Fast.

Twilight Sparkle is exhausted.

All day, she's been working her hooves down to the bone, tackling a never-ending stream of paperwork. She just wants to go back to her guest room, take a shower, and relax for the next couple of years.

After looking around, she opens the door to what she thinks is her bedroom, only to find Princess Celestia and Queen Novo....making out.

Things only go downhill from there.



Special thanks to Georg and BronyWriter for proofreading and editing.

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It wasn’t easy being a heroine.

Twilight Sparkle trotted down the polished stone corridors of Mount Aris, her body screaming with every step.

The newsreels and the papers made it look easy- she and her friends would jump in, flash a smile, say something about friendship, then use magic to defeat whatever was threatening Equestria this time. Rinse and repeat. They never mentioned the other, less dramatic parts, like helping to clean up the colossal mess said threat had left behind.

Or, in her case, cleaning up one of her own mistakes.

Something throbbed in Twilight’s hoof. She moaned, rubbing her sides with a wing. Pain, she was in so much pain. Admittedly, it wasn’t the worst pain she’d ever felt; right now, it was somewhere in-between “being slammed into the side of a mountain by Tirek” and “having to put up with Discord for an entire day”.

The only reason she was trotting rather than limping was because she wasn’t sure which part of her hurt more. Everything was pain; her shoulders and withers and hocks ached from carrying stacks of documents. Her rump had almost gone numb from hours of sitting down. Her eyes smarted and ached like crazy, protesting the hours she’d spent studying documents written in a language she could barely read.

“Why did I volunteer for this again?” She grumbled

Gee, I don’t know. Twilight muttered to herself. “Maybe it’s because you tried to steal the Pearl of Transformation after using your own friends as a distraction!”

Twilight blew a strand of frayed, indigo mane out of her face. Ugh, she must look like a wreck. Tangled, greasy mane, matted coat, and chipped hooves. Once she was done wading through this sea of red tape, she was going to make a beeline for the nearest spa. A nice hoof filing, some time in the sauna and a good massage would do wonders.

Dear goddess, I’m turning into Rarity!

A craftspony squeezed his way past her, carrying a box of tools on his back. Three months ago, this hallway, like most of the kingdom, had been a maid’s nightmare: dust everywhere, weeds and creepers strangling everything, and with rooms inhabited only by vermin. Now, it was a hive of activity, one that would put a changeling hive to shame. All around Twilight, armies of masons, sculptors, and workponies were bringing the dilapidated castle back to life. Above her, techno-mages installed new mage-lights to replace the antiquated oil lamps, while unicorn glaziers carefully worked to replace shattered and cracked panes. The air was filled with the sounds of hammering, shouting, bolting, and sawing.

Rummaging through her saddlebag, Twilight fished out a stick of No-Doze gum and popped it in her mouth, trying to ignore the horribly bitter taste stinging her tongue. Caffeinated juice soaked into her body, pushing back the sleepiness. Equis’ gravity became a little more bearable. Some of the fuzziness vanished from her head.

This was going to be her last stick. She swore.

Two masons, one an earth pony, the other a hippogriff, rushed past Twilight, tool belts slapping against their barrels. The pony just ignored her, but the hippogriff gave her a glare that could shatter glass. While Queen Novo had forgiven her- saving all of Equestria from the Storm King was a good way to earn clemency- quite a few of the castle staff had not. The past three days, she’d “accidentally” been tripped, ignored, and overall shunned by the majority of the castle staff. Not that Twilight blamed them. After that little stunt, she wasn’t too happy with herself either.

As she walked, Twilight passed one of the hallways’ many large, picture windows. Curious, she reared up on her hind legs and stared through the crystal-glass window, her breath fogging the glass. From up here, the entire kingdom was like a like one of those insanely-intricate models made by obsessive-compulsive hobbyists. Ant-sized hippogriffs climbing over skeleton-like scaffolding, repairing dilapidated homes and shops and demolishing anything.Toy-sized airships clustered by the city’s docking towers, offloading passengers and cargo, while in the harbor, teams of tadpole-sized seaponies guided ships into docks.

All of that work, and yet there was still so much to do...

It didn’t help that there was that little question nibbling at the corner of her mind.

“Twilight!”

Something warm and downy pressed against Twilight’s side, and before Twilight could react, she was seized by two soft, downy limbs and pressed against something warm.

“Hello, Skystar,” she mumbled through sweet-smelling feathers

“Twilight! It’s so good to see you, again!” said the hyperactive hippogriff, squeezing the purple pony princess like a plush toy. The feeling wasn’t unpleasant, like being hugged by a living blanket, but it made it rather hard to breathe and made an strange squeaking noise.

“Sky... remember what we said... about personal space,” Twilight wheezed, getting a good noseful of her friends’ pleasant scent of soap and fresh feathers.

“Oh, sorry!” Reluctantly, Skystar released her. “It’s just that it’s been so long…”

“Long?” Twilight said, brushing a cream-colored feather off her coat. “Sky, we saw each other at breakfast this morning, remember?”

“I know, I know, but it felt like forever. Guess I’m still not used to this whole, ‘having friends that talk back’ thing. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Shelly and Shelldon are great to have around, but they’re not much for conversation.” She leaned in. “Don’t tell them I told you this,” she whispered “but friends like you are also a whole lot cuddlier.”

Twilight smiled. “My lips are sealed,” she said, rubbing an eye with a wing.

“Thanks!” Sky ran her beak through Twilight’s mane in the traditional hippogriff manner.

“Boy, you look tired. I mean really tired. You must have been really busy today. I mean, we’ve all been really busy, what with getting the kingdom cleaned up and all, but you’ve been the busiest of the bunch. You’re so busy that bees look at you and say ‘gee that mare is really busy’! “

Twilight shook her head and nickered. If there was an award for being hyperactive, Skystar would be a very close silver to Pinkie Pie’s gold. Then again, if she and the rest of her species had spent the last decade or so suffering from an extreme case of cabin fever, she’d be pretty enthusiastic about meeting new ponies as well.

New ponies. A switch in Twilight’s brain flipped itself, sending her train of thought on sudden detour. One that had been nibbling at her ever since she’d arrived.

“Something wrong, Twi?”

“No, I’m fine,” Twilight said. “Perfectly fine.”

“Are you sure?” Skystar said, a concerned look on her face. “It looks like you’ve got something really, really big on your mind.”

“Really, it’s nothing.” She yawned. “Just need to get some rest, that’s all.”

“C’mon, Twilight. You can tell me. I mean, we’re friends, and friends help friends when friends need help.”

Twilight sighed. Her bubbly bird friend had a point. “Sky, can you keep a secret?”

“You betcha!”

“Good.” She took hold of her friend’s claw and led her into a nearby supply closet. Her horn glowed purple, and an oily, shimmering bubble enveloped the pair. All of the ambient sound from outside was suddenly cut off. The closet became deathly quiet.

“There,” Twilight said. “That Silent Shimmer Spell should prevent anypony from eavesdropping.”

“Oooh... shimmery...” Sky tapped the side of the magical membrane, causing it to ripple like water.

“Uh, Sky?”

“Oh, right.” Skystar snapped back to attention. “So, what’s bothering you.?”
“It’s about your kingdom,” Twilight said. “Until a few months ago, I’d never heard of it. Ever.”

“So?” Skystar cocked her head. “That’s not so weird. I mean, we’re pretty far from the major shipping lanes, and until now, we didn’t have much contact with the mainland, so we didn’t get many visitors.” She smiled. “Of course, now we have lots and lots of visitors!”

“It’s more than that, Sky,” Twilight said, flicking her tail. “I’ve read every encyclopedia, atlas, and bestiary in the Royal Archives at least twice. None of them mentioned anything about your people. The only book I found that said anything about the hippogriffs was that book Capper owned.”

Twilight sighed. “I could understand if there were only a few unconfirmed rumors or a single entries in a textbook, but nothing at all?”

Sky cocked her head. “Yeah, that is kinda weird.”

“But, here’s what gets me. if Equestrian scholars knew absolutely nothing about your kind, how does Princess Celestia know your mother?

“I... I don’t know.” Sky put a wingtip to her chin. “She never said much about the mainland, just that it wasn’t the place for us. If she had a pony friend, she never told me.”

“Well, it’s obvious that she must have had some contact with your people. I mean, why else would she tell me to find the queen of the hippogriffs if she had no idea what a hippogriff was? And you’ve seen the way she acts around your mom. It isn’t like two leaders meeting for the first time, it’s like two old friends reuniting.“But...why would she keep it a secret?” Twilight’s ears drooped. “Why wouldn’t she tell me?”

Suddenly, the closet door creaked open. An earth pony janitor took a step into the closet, then froze, eyes wide open, as if they were trying to squeeze themselves out of his skull. Without another word, he slowly backed away, then shut the door behind them.

Great. Now, the rumor mill was going to go nuts..

Once that little bit of awkwardness had passed, Skystar placed a soft talon on Twilight’s shoulder. “Twi, I haven’t known Princess Celestia for long, but what mom told me, she’s a really nice pony.” A smile slowly spread across her face. “If she did, I’m sure she had a good reason.

“Yeah.” Twilight returned her friend’s smile with one of her own. “You’re right.” With a thought, she dispelled the shimmering bubble with loud pop and the sharp smell of ozone, making Skystar’s downy fur stand upright for a moment. “Thanks, Sky.”

“No problem. What are friends for?”

Before Twilight could respond, a massive yawn forced its way out of her throat.” Sorry to cut this short, Sky, but I really need to lie down,” she said, followed by another yawn. “Ugh…” She hadn’t felt like this since that time she pulled an all-nighter studying for her final exam. That had not been pleasant.

“Okey Dokey, Smokey! You go get some sleep. Mom wants me to supervise some construction work down in Seaquestia, so I guess I’d better get going.” For a moment, something appeared in Sky’s eyes. like there was something she wanted to say, but couldn’t.

“Goodbye…” she said softly before heading off towards the city square, while her words bounced around Twilight’s head like a housefly in a box.

I’m sure she had a really good reason

I’m sure she had a really good reason.

It must have been true. It had to be true.

Celestia wouldn’t lie to her. Celestia was the kindest, sweetest mare in all of Equestria. Celestia would never hold a secret from her unless it was absolutely necessary.

Then why did she have this bad taste in her mouth?

She needed answers. It was time to ask her former teacher a few questions. If Celestia really did have a good reason for keeping this entire kingdom a secret, then she would answer them.

Twilight shook her head and yawned. But that could wait. Besides, the two of them were probably pretty busy right now. Ever since they arrived some two weeks ago,Celestia and Novon had been spending a lot of time together. Probably catching up on old times or negotiating an alliance or something. Whatever, she could deal with this perplexing princess problem later.

Right now, she was going straight to her guest room and taking a long, hot shower.

Twilight stopped. Problem: where is my room again? Was it down the hall to her left, past that carving of the first king of Hippogriffia? Or was it further down, behind that door right at the end of the hall. Ugh, this place put a minotaur labyrinth to shame. If she’d had any brains at all she would have asked Skystar for directions!

C’mon Sparkle, you know this it’s... it’s... there, right at the end of the hall. She was 89.74 percent certain of that.

Good enough for government work.

Trotting over to the thick wooden door, Twilight yawned and pressed the metal plate in its center. First, she was making a beeline for the tub and taking a nice, long, hot bath to get all of that sweat and dust out of her fur. That should help chase some of the sleepiness away.

The door swung open without a noise. Whoever had repaired it had done an excellent job with those hinges. Seriously, she would have to hire this hippogriff for her own castle.

The first thing she noticed was that this was not her guestroom, rather, it looked like some kind of study, probably Queen Novo’s. The second thing she noticed were two figures sprawled out over a throw rug older than some nations, wrapped in each other’s forelegs. Beside them were a collection of discarded jewelry and other regalia. Very familiar regalia...

Twilight’s brain paused for a few seconds, struggling to process what she was seeing, then melted. Her train of thought was more than derailed. It jumped the tracks, rolled over, and exploded
Princess Celestia? Queen Novo?!

-

During her tenure as bearer of the Element of Magic, Twilight had seen some pretty shocking things: reality being turned inside out by a bored god, Canterlot being taken over by changelings, her friends being drained of magic, Spike making out with a pillow that had a picture of Rarity’s face taped to it, that kind of stuff.

Now she had another image permanantely branded into her brain. Her mentor and Queen Novo on the floor. Making out. She winced as Celestia nipped Novo’s neck with her blunt pony teeth, while Novo rubbed her downy head against her lover’s neck, running her beak through the alicorn’s fur. The study was filled with the sound of kissing, smacking, and moaning.

But that wasn’t the most shocking part. That honor belonged to the tear tracks running down Celestia’s face... and the golden engagement band around her right fetlock.

What… The universe turned upside down. Black was white, Down was up. Right was left. On an intellectual level, she knew that the Princess was still a mare, with a mare’s needs, but there was still part of her that just couldn’t accept it. Celestia was supposed to be pure, virginal. She wasn’t supposed to be intimate.

As she watched, something started to tickled inside Twilight’s nostrils. Before she could move, a sneeze The sneeze exploded from her mouth like a bomb. Novo and Celestia froze. Two pairs of eyes shot open, pupils shrinking to pinpricks.

“Twilight?!” Celestia gave a a startled whinny, wings flared in surprise. Novo gave a startled squawk, her chest feathers poofing out in a comical manner.

Inside Twilight’s head, the little gears started turning again.

“Ack! Sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry!” Twilight squealed, covering her eyes with her wings.

“Twilight, wait!”

“Sorrysorrysorry!” Twilight reared up on her hind legs, swiveled around and started running only for something to slam into her, sending sparks dancing in front of her eyes. The next thing Twilight knew, she was laying flat on her back, with Celestia’s concerned face looking down on her.

“Twilight, Twilight!” Celestia said, her face painted with concern. “Are you alright?” She held up a hoof. “How many hooves am I holding up?”

“Ugh….Grandma, stop eating all the waffles,” she mumbled.

“I’ll fetch the doctor!” Nove said.

Twilight’s brain finally reset. “It’s fine. I’m... alright. She groaned, pushing herself up while rubbing her forehead like a pony rubbing a magic lamp. Either she was growing a second horn, or there was a good-sized bump on her head. She was betting on the latter.

“What... ow…. happened?” She winced, rubbing her newly-acquired bump.

“Well, your forehead and the doorframe had a disagreement,” Novo smirked, running a talon along the edge of a head-shaped dent in the wood. “It got rather heated.” She looked around the room. “Now where is that guard I sent to fetch some.

As if on cue, a hippogriff guard rushed in, carrying an ice pack on his back. “Ah, there he is.Here.” Novo placed the pack on Twilight's bruised head.

“Thank you, your highness.” Stinging cold soaked through her skull, slowly dulling the pain from a splitting headache to a dull ache. A shame it couldn’t do anything for her bruised ego. No amount of ice could take care of that.

For a moment, Twilight just stood there there, ice pack pressed against her head while she tried to think of something to say. Both parties just stared at each other, frozen in place by the obvious manticore in the room. Time came to an impasse. By the Queen’s desk, a grandfather clock worth as much as a small house ticked away the hours, as if it were saying “awk-ward, awk-ward, awk-ward” over and over again.

Inside Twilight's head, questions squeezed themselves together, jostling and fighting themselves like shoppers at a Hearthswarming sale. How long had this been going on? Why hadn’t she been told? Enough questions to fill an entire library, so much it felt like her head was going to split.

And she couldn’t say a single word.

Novo groaned, “Ugh, what is this, a staring contest? Somepony, start talking already!”

“Oh, right… right.” Celestia took a deep breath, then released it, running a hoof through her frazzled mane. “Well, I guess now is as good a time as any.” She sighed. “Twilight, I suppose we both have a bit of explaining to do.”

“A bit?” Novo said, raising an eyebrow.

Celestia nickered. A bit of the tension in the room melted. “Okay, a lot of explaining to do.” She motioned towards one of the nest-like couches. “You may want to sit down for this.”

Twilight nodded and sat down on the nearest couch, her flanks sinking into the soft, velvet cushion. One of the questions managed to break through her mental log jam. “How... how long?”

“Quite a while,” Celestia said. “I’d say we’ve been... close friends for about… oh, a hundred and fifty two years now, give or take a month.”

Twilight nearly fell off of her seat. “A hundred and fifty-two years?

“We hippogriffs age gracefully.” Novo said, beaming. “Right now, I am exactly two hundred years old.”

“And you don’t look a day over ninety.” Celestia gave Novo a gentle lick, which the Queen rewarded with a nuzzle.

“Next question?”

“How many? Twilight said, trying to put her thoughts in order.”

“Right now, Luna is the only one I’ve actually told, while Novo has already told Skystar,” Celestia said. And Cadence, well,” Celestia nickered, “she figured it out by herself.

“Why, didn’t you tell me?” Twilight hung her head.

“We... we felt it was best to keep it between us for now. Don’t get us wrong, we had planned to tell you, but with all the work you’ve been doing, well, we thought it might prove too distracting. We were waiting for the right time.”

“It’s… not just that, Princess.”

“Let me guess,” Novo said. ”You want to know why you’ve never heard of our race before?”

Before Twilight could react, Novo gave an amused chirp. “Don’t look so surprised. Celly-Welly has told me a lot about you.”

“Dear!” Celestia blushed. “You know I hate that nickname!”

“What, I think it’s cute, Sunny Buns.”

“Well, whatever you say, Novey-Wovey”

“Cel-Cel.”

“Cuddlebird.”

“Come here you!”

The two giggled. Novo stroked Celestia’s mane, and was rewarded by an line of kisses across her downy neck. Twilight swore she’d be a diabetic by the time this day was over.

“Enjoying the show?” Novo said.

Twilight’s body temperature shot up a couple of degrees. Her cheeks flushed. “Oh, uh, I…”

“Now, Novey, don’t tease,” Celestia said, giving her lover a gentle nip.

“I’m the Queen of the Hippogriffs, Celly.” Novo nipped her fiancee’s ear. “If I want to tease somepony, I will. It’s my divine right.”

“Got me there.” Celestia nickered, then turned back to Twilight. “Oh my! it looks like we, got a little sidetracked there. Where were we again?” She put a hoof to her chin.“Oh yes.”

The smile slowly vanished from Celestia’s face. “Twilight, I know you must feel confused, maybe even a little betrayed. For that, I sincerely apologize,” She hung her head. “Believe me, it was not by choice.”

“Not by choice?”

“It’s a long story,” Novo said. She cracked a smile. “But from what Celly’s told me, you like long stories.”

No denying that. Twilight thought.

“Shall we start at the beginning?” Celestia said.

“Where else?” Novo cleared her throat with a strange clucking sound. “It was a dark and stormy night…”

“Novo!”

“Sorry, couldn’t resist. Anyway, our little story started, oh, about one hundred and ninety years ago. My father, King SkyStreak, broke with tradition when he made first contact with the Equestrian government. While we’d had contact with the mainland before, it was nothing like this.”

“He always was a bit of a maverick,” Celestia said.

“To help establish relations between our two peoples, he would often send me along to act as his envoy during his visits. It was his way of helping me, ‘spread my wings’.”

“You were so cute back then,” Celestia said. “Here, let me show you!”

One of the dresser drawers slid open, and a single piece of cardboard floated over to Twilight. It was Queen Novo all right, but much, much cuter, fluffier and gangly, with that peculiar awkwardness that came with adolescence.

“Tia!” Novo’s feathers ruffled as she snatched the photograph from Twilight’s hoof.

“What?” Celestia said, a mischevious smile on her face. “I just wanted to show Twilight just how cute my little cuddlebird was.”

The Queen’s feathers flattened against her body. Her flustered expression faded. “Anyway,” Celestia said. “Our initial meetings were a bit awkward, but over time, we became good friends.”
“Yes, whenever we met, “Novo said, “Tia and I would always have a good time. We’d start off talking about politics, personal things, you know the like. Then we’d get bored and go play a prank on some unsuspecting noble.”

“Oh, remember that time we shaved off Lord Thimbleberry’s eyebrows?” Novo said, letting out a loud, raucous chirp.” Poor sap refused to be seen in public until they grew back!”

“Ah, yes,” Celestia with a nicker. “Good times. Good times.”

Anyway,” Novo said. “ When I turned fifty, my father, Faust bless his soul, passed away. After his ashes were returned to the sky, I was anointed the new ruler of Hippogriffia. By then, Tia and I were virtually inseparable. We would find any excuse we could to meet up such as birthday parties, balls, etc. Of course, being as thick-headed as we were, it wasn’t until my fifty-fifth birthday that we finally realized that we loved each other.”

“After that, well, we could barely keep our hooves off each other.”

Twilight’s cheeks flushed. Too much information. Way too much information. From the look on Novo’s face, she could tell the Queen was enjoying this

“We inevitably starting talking about marriage. It made sense politically. What better way to bind our two kingdoms together than with a wedding band?”

“So, what happened?”

A shadow fell across Celestia’s face. “Treachery. One of my guards, whose name will never be spoken again, attempted to steal the Pearl of Transformation and use its power to overthrow our respective kingdoms.”

“What? Why hadn’t I heard of this? And How could the pearl do that?” When she’d tried to steal the Pearl, she hadn’t really thought about how she was going to use it against the Storm King. She'd just been desperate for something, anything, that could save Equestria.

Impulse control. I really need to work on my impulse control.

“I’m getting to that.” Celestia said, turning to Novo. “Novo?”

“Twilight,” Novo said sternly “What I’m about to tell you doesn not leave this room. Got that?”

Twilight nodded.

"Good. Now, Twilight, the Pearl of Transformation is far more powerful than is generally known. If it’s full power were unlocked, it could do a whole lot more than change you into a seapony. It could turn off gravity, turn an army into mist, even snuff out the sun if you wanted to! Somehow, that... stallion found out about this...”

Twilight blood froze in her veins. That kind of power, and she’d nearly stolen it…

“Thankfully,” Celestia said, “Novo and I were able to stop my former guard before he could escape.” Her ears flattened against her scalp. “But the damage had already been done.” She placed a wing on her fiancee’s back. “Novo was convinced that the only way to keep the pearl safe was to break off all contact with the mainland. I tried to convince her otherwise, but in the end, I agreed.”

She sniffed. Novo squeezed her hoof. “ To keep the kingdom safe, I ordered that every record of the Hippogriffs: maps, encyclopedias, bestiaries, and the like, was to be collected and destroyed. That book you found in Klugetown was probably the last of its kind.”

Something froze inside Twilight. All of those books. Destroyed...

“Once that horrible deed was done, I cast a memory-clouding spell over all of Equestria. Nothing extreme, mind you, just enough to ensure that memories of the hippogriffs would slowly fade away. In a few years, nothing was left, not even a memory. It was one of the hardest decisions of my life.”

A few tears trickled down Twilight’s cheeks. “So, what changed?” Twilight asked.

“You did, Miss Sparkle,” Novo said with a smile. “When I heard how you and your friends defeated the Storm King, I realized that this whole ‘cut ourselves off from the rest of the world’ policy’ was a mistake from the start. Isolation didn’t defeat the Storm King; friendship did.”

Twilight smiled. For the first time since she’d arrived here, she actually felt proud of herself.

“Now, if you don’t mind,” Novo said, her eyes half-lidded. “Celly and I have some...things to discuss.

“Well…” Twilight said. Her cheeks flushed. “I guess I’d better leave you two alone.” The gum was starting to wear off anyway.

She started towards the door, then stopped. “Queen Novo?”

“Yes?”

“Which way is it to the guest rooms?”

“Oh, down the hall and to your left.”

“Thanks,” Twilight said and closed the door. She then trotted down the hallway to her room with a spring in her step and a smile on her face, aches, and pains be damned.

She was going to sleep well tonight.