> The Michael Rosen Pony Adventure > by Alfoals Trottenbauer > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > I - Rosen Up Your Bows > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ace slowly, and observantly, trotted through the titanic temple. Moss covered the walls and floor. Torches were placed on the ground and burned bright. Ace's hoofsteps echoed through the room. "Hellow, I em Joe Sparkel, Teh best mans aliv. I m mor megikul then Bliglit Spackle" Somepony said behind him in a strange voice. Ace jumped three feet in the air, and darted his head behind him. Ace looked the stallion over, he seemed to be poorly drawn, composed of scribbles. His body was very long, as if he were a wiener dog. "...What." Ace said, more disappointed than confused. "I'm am best mans in worled." Ace continued to trot away and the weird pony disappeared. An ugly old human's face appeared at the wall he was facing. The man was cut off at the forearms. He wore a blue shirt and his hair was grey. He talked in a British accent. "I am the Skyfoogle, the fiercest animal in the world! I eat nothing and spit useless information." The man said. His eyes widened. "Quick! Get out! Get out of here! The Lollipop Lady has escaped!" He shouted. Ace looked behind him again. The same man was behind him, he was cut off at the forearms too, the only difference was he was wearing blonde clip art hair and his shirt was colored pink. "Hello, Michael Rosen. No need to remind you about what happened last time?" "Shut up, stinks! You can't rule my life." Michael Rosen retorted. Lollipop lady launched stop signs at Michael and Michael jumped out of the way. The stop signs exploded when they hit the wall. "Lemonade boys!" Lollipop lady called out. Smaller Michael Rosens with yellow shirts poured out from a wall. "Lemonade! Lemonade! Lemonade! Lemonade! Lemonade!" Exclaimed the smaller Michaels repeatedly. "Oh no, this is horrible!" Michael Rosen moaned. Ace hid behind a raised block. The Lemonade boys surrounded him. Michael looked to his side, finding a metal rod. "Wall bar." He quickly seized it in his hands. "Right! That's it!" Michael Rosen asserted, moving towards Lollipop Lady. Lollipop Lady threw more stop signs. Michael moved behind her and hit her with the wall bar. "Oow! That hurt!" Lollipop lady cried out. "Hoorayy!" Michael exclaimed. Ace raised his head above the block. "Who are you?" Michael asked Ace. "I'm Ace Sparks, why are there so many copies of you?" "What are you talking about?" Michael asked. "Lollipop lady, she's you, but with a pink shirt and a wig!" "I don't know!" Michael bleated. Michael snapped his fingers, seemingly in a moment of brilliance. "Chocolate cake." He smiled. He seemed to be holding some sort of invisible object and was about to eat it. He darted his head to his left and right as if someone was watching. He was about to eat it again, and repeated the process. He finally shoved it into his mouth, chewing mightily on the imaginary cake. Another human entered the temple. He had a purple shirt. "Harrybo." "Yes, Michael? What'd you want?" "Lollipop Lady was in here, but I hit her with a wall bar." Explained Michael. "Right, good thinking." Harrybo complimented. Lollipop lady was on the floor. "Let's go further into this temple." Ace suggested. "Good thinking." Michael responded. The three walked into a narrowing corridor. "Ace, you're a horse, right?" Michael asked. "Yeah, why?" "Yeah, um... I see you're a bit wobbly." "Wobbly? How do you mean wobbly?" Ace asked. "I was thinking you might be a bit bendy." "Bendy? ...I'm beginning to get the picture. Oh yes, bendy, bendy, bendy, snap!" Ace felt obliged to say. Michael Rosen clicked his tongue. "Noice." "How did you guys even get into equestria?" Ace asked, still a bit flustered about humans suddenly coming back from what he thought to be extinction. "We went to the Chocolate Swiss cafe and found a portal. We thought we'd see what was on the other side. Next thing we knew, we saw you." "So you just went into a random portal without knowing anything about it?" Ace asked. "Yeah, why?" "Well, you should probably know more about Equestria. Where do I start... Well, Equestria is ruled by a Princess, Princess Celestia, to be exact. The main sentient race is Ponies, or Equestrians. There are unicorns, like myself, earth ponies, pegasi, and the rarest of all, Alicorns. Every now and then, a huge outcrop of perfect Alicorns burst into Equestria, and we have a dedicated portal which we throw them in... Oh, I almost forgot... The history here is ric-" "Right, along the passage," Harrybo interrupted. "We've got to be careful not to tread-" A loud creaking echoed through the hall. A boulder crashed behind them and started to roll towards them. "Oh nooo!" Michael cried out. "Quick! Get out!" They ran to the end of the passage which got thinner until it was a slit Ace could barely fit through. They escaped the hallway and them boulder crashed into the wall behind them. "Under the desk lid." Harrybo said. A trapdoor rose from the floor. A ladder was inside the shaft under it. They climbed down the ladder and at the bottom were dark tunnels with water at the bottom. The water began to rise. "It's filling up with dirty, soapy water." Michael commented. The water soon filled the tunnels. Ace began to swim upward. The water went above his head. Michael Rosen moved to a switch. "I found the Kitchen Door Handle." He smiled as he pulled it and opened the door. Ace desperately swam into the room as it began filling up with water. A switch was on the other side of the room. Ace pulled it and the water slowly drained. The three went through the tunnel. Another Michael Rosen with a yellow shirt walked through the tunnels toward them. "Brian!" Michael shouted. "Hi everybody! Anything happen today?" Brian asked. "Lollipop lady followed us into Equestria." Michael answered. "Oh, horrible!" Brian replied. "Who is Lollipop Lady, anyway?" Ace asked. "Lollipop Lady is the toenail inspector. If she catches us, we are dead." Michael explained as he hit the back of his neck as a gesture. "That's pretty bad..." Ace responded. > II - The Skyfoogle > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The four walked through the tunnels when suddenly, a stop sign flew through the air and exploded on the wall in front of them. "Ah!" Brian shouted as he flew back. "Lollipop Lady!" Michael jumped. "Lemonade boys!" Lollipop lady called. "Lemonade! Lemonade! Lemonade! Lemonade!" The Lemonade Boys hung Harrybo by the arms. "She strings you up from the wall bars." He explained. Lollipop Lady threw another stop sign and Michael was flung backwards. Ace galloped toward Lollipop lady and bucked her. "Oow!" Ace levitated Michael's wall bar from earlier and hit her with it. "Ah!" She fell over. Ace freed Harrybo. "Would you believe it!? Ace saved us!" Michael exclaimed. "Did you know my granddad told me 'Useless Information', and he just fell over and died..." Harrybo said. "We know that, you fool!" Brian said. "Suddenly Lollipop Lady, just stands up! Ha! Dusts herself off," Lollipop Lady begins. Michael hits her with a wall bar. "Ooow!" "No..." Michael said sleepily. A loud roaring came from the floor. "Something's on the floor, roaring." The water erupted with some sort of creature. The Skyfoogle." "The fiercest animal in the world." "Quick! Get out of here!" They ran through the halls, and it led to a door. Ace knocked it open, and they ran through. The Skyfoogle crashed into the doorway. A chandelier hung from the ceiling and two spiral staircases were opposite each other. They went up the stairs and into another hallway, which was well lit. There were doorways that branched off the sides. > III - Dining Hall > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- They went through the door on the end. "Dinner hall." Michael commented. A long table stood on the floor and eighteen chairs rested along the sides. Counters were on the walls of the room. A stove cut between two counters and a sink was indented into another. There was a fridge on the side of the room. "Fridge... What's in it?" Brian asked as he went over and opened it. He pulled a pitcher filled with orange liquid out of the fridge. "Oh, this is peach syrup." He smiled as he took the top into his mouth. The liquid in the pitcher turned from a warm orange into a disgusting yellow. "Blech! Thick cooking oil!" "Haha!" Michael laughed. "I don't think it's funny," Brian stated. A plate rested on the table, with still steaming potatoes. "Hot food. Oh, I love hot food." Harrybo said as he put his hands on his head. He went over to it and ate some. His eyeballs popped out of his head and he started dancing around the table. "Watch out everybody, the potato's a bit hot." Ace placed a hoof over his face. "Why are we even in a dining room? There's a woman coming after us, and she throws exploding stop signs. Shouldn't we be running?" Ace asked. "Now, you might be thinking, 'If the Lollipop Lady is after us, why are we mucking about in the Dining Hall?" Michael responded. "Yeah, that's exactly what I'm thinking." Ace interjected. "Fair enough, and I'll tell you. It's because... I dunno!" "Alright, but let's get going then." Ace said, indicating a hoof towards the door. Michael Rosen spotted a chocolate cake on the table. He snapped his fingers. "Michael, don't do it." Ace warned. "Chocolate cake." "Michael! Don't do it!" He said louder. "And I can't stop myself! I go chop! chop!" He started chopping the cake and scarfing down slice after slice. Another man fell from the ceiling. He had a white long-sleeve shirt on with pictures of flowers on it. He ate the rest of the cake. When the cake was gone, the man in the white shirt got off the table. "Oh no... It's all gone! What am I going to do?" He asked the air. "Older Rosen." Michael asked the man with the white shirt. "I know! I'll just wash up the plate, no one will notice..." Older Rosen continued. "Older Rosen!" "No need to shout. Blimey!" He responded. "Lollipop lady has escaped!" Michael said to Older Rosen. "Oh no!" > IV - Do You Want an Apple? > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Ace." "Yeah?" "Do you want an apple?" "No." "Go on, Ace. Go on." Harrybo coaxed. "Alright. Harrybo produced an apple and gave it to him. Ace levitated it and took a bite. He fell over. "What." Michael said as he looked at Harrybo. Michael picked up the apple. "Finger in, smell it," Michael sniffed the apple and looked at Harrybo. "Just as I suspected... Drug things. Why?" "I dunno!?" Lollipop lady appeared. "I put the Drug Things in that apple." She stated. "Oh no! The moment I dread when Ace falls over and sleeps." Lollipop lady threw a stop sign and it exploded, hitting Harrybo. "Ah!" Older Rosen went up to Lollipop lady. "I'm drilling for oil, bzzzzzzz!" He said as he put a finger into his other hand. "Ooooow!" Lollipop lady shouted. She fell flat on the ground. Older Rosen poured water on Ace's head. "What happened!?" Ace said as he slowly raised his head. "Lollipop Lady put drug things in that apple." "...Oh, that explains why I had that weird dream. A floating potato was talking to Michael at someplace called the Chocolate Swiss Cafe." Ace explained. They walked out of the dining hall and went around the corner of a corridor. A floating bowl of ice cream glowed red in front of them. "Oh no! It's the Ice Cream Foogle." "Die." The Ice Cream Foogle demanded. "No." Michael responded. "Alright! Don't worry about it!" Brian said as he died. "Oh no! The moment I dread when my brother keels over and dies!" Michael cried out. Ace bucked the Ice Cream Foogle into the wall, shattering the bowl. "Ow! I'm dead!" The Ice Cream Foogle shouted. "Suddenly, my brother, just stands up! Ha! Dusts himself off! Revival." Michael said as Brian stood back up. The Ice Cream Foogle melted on the floor. "Stop right there." Lollipop lady said as she teleported off with Michael Rosen. > V - No Breathing! > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- "No Breathing!" Lollipop Lady shouted as she pulled a lever labelled 'Air'. Michael took a deep breath and held it. "Miss! Can I go outside and do some breathing?" Michael Complained. "No! You had all your life to breathe!" "Oh nooooo!" "You used to hear the weak ones going down behind you-" Michael began to explain. "No you didn't!" Lollipop Lady interrupted. "Why not?" "It's because... There isn't any one around!" "Do you want some puffed wheat?" Michael asked. "No." "Do you want a Chocolate Swiss Roll?" "No eating!" Michael sat in front of a desk. He pulled up the lid and snatched a quick, gasping breath of air. He closed it on his thumbs, with his tongue between his teeth. "No snatching a quick breath!" Lollipop lady commanded. "Alright, don't worry about it!" Michael's cheeks started getting blue. "Can I have a drink?" Michael asked. "No." "I wan't some crisps..." "No." "My hands are sticky." "Shut up, Michael!" Michael pulled a toothbrush out of his pocket. He started bending it. "Bendy, bendy. Bendy bendy bendy! Snap!" "Ah!" Lollipop lady was caught by surprise. "If I hear one more thing out of you, I shall give you to the ducks!" Lollipop Lady threatened. > VI - Conversations With a 200 Year-old Raisin > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Where'd michael go?" Brian asked. "The Lollipop Lady took him far away." Harrybo answered. "How do you know that?" "I dunno!" The four walked through the corridor and came across a raisin floating in the air. "I am the Two hundred year-old Raisin. I am the oldest raisin in the world." "Do you want a raisin?" Older Rosen asked. "I am a raisin, you fool!" "I know where the Lollipop lady is hiding Michael." The old Raisin stated. "Where?" Ace asked. "He is in the classroom on the left, along the passage behind me." Older Rosen picked up the 200 year-old Raisin. "What are you doing!?" "No Eating the Raisin!" Brian said as he took the Raisin and put him down. They went down the corridor and into the classroom. Michael was sitting in a chair. He was holding his breath, his cheeks were puffed up and his face was blue. He looked at the four. "Am I glad to see you guys." He said. "No breathing!" Lollipop Lady shouted. "Shut up, stinks! You can't rule my life!" Michael Retorted. Harrybo ran up to Lollipop Lady and hit her with a rolled up comic. "Pew!" "Ah!" She fell over. "Hard luck, Lollipop Lady, always knew you were a bit weak." Michael taunted. They left the room. There was a light on the end of the hall. The went toward it and they exited the temple. The went to a green hill with city walls. But green hills don't have city walls!