> Deathbed Confession > by Dreadnought > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Chapter I > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight Sparkle shifted uneasily in her chair, whose soft cushions did little to distract her from the dismal surroundings. The heavy air reeked of nothing but Clorox, Lysol, floor wax and every other type of cleaning agent and disinfectant known in Equestria. The fluorescent lights overhead filled the room with an artificial, sterile light of such intensity and uniformity that it saturated the senses. And the room lay ominously quiet, the silence only broken by the ceaseless Tick, Tick, Tick from the wall clock. But the other ponies in the room really made the scene depressing. To her right sat Starlight Glimmer, nervously glancing around the room and always on the verge of speaking, but never able to find the words. Next to her was Rarity, her normally immaculate appearance now quite disheveled. She absentmindedly stroked Sweetie Belle’s mane as the younger unicorn laid her head on her sister’s lap. Scootaloo could offer little comfort, instead anxiously fiddling with her hooves as the time slowly passed. And at the far end, Fluttershy fought a losing battle to maintain her composure, tears frequently pooling in her eyes before silently trickling down her cheeks. To Twilight’s left were the two most active ponies she knew – Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. The blue pegasus, winner of countless races and flying competitions, merely slumped in her chair. A mare more accustomed to quick – often violent – action, she was lost just sitting idle with nothing to do. Meanwhile the normally manic pink mare looked equally lost. Nothing gave her greater happiness than making ponies smile, but nothing could elicit a smile from the present company, not that Pinkie Pie really tried. Instead she nibbled on yet another frosted cupcake as she stared down at the white floor tiles. Perhaps it was the light, but Pinkie Pie’s coat appeared a duller shade of pink and her mane seemed to hang limply about her. But the group of ponies sitting on the couch directly across from Twilight made the scene truly heart-wrenching. Big McIntosh sat quietly without his usual horse collar, clearly exhausted from the emotional drain he was enduring. Sugar Belle leaned into the large stallion, providing him more emotional than physical support. Her attempts at putting on a brave face failed to hide her own worry. Next to the pair sat Applejack, holding her sister Apple Bloom tight. The younger filly sniffled frequently and her eyes bore an unmistakable red hue. The older mare failed to notice, her vacant stare indicating her thoughts lay elsewhere. With each unrelenting Tick of the clock, the tension continued to build to unbearable levels. Even though Twilight could hardly stand it, she knew the Apple family was enduring far worse. If only she could do something or say something. But there was nothing she could do, nothing she could say that would help. Right now the most she could do was simply be there for emotional support. And so she sat, along with the rest of her friends, offering silent prayers. At last the door swung open, and instantly twelve sets of eyes fell upon the amber-colored unicorn wearing a white lab coat. Everypony sat up, hoping for good news. But Dr. Horse’s face revealed the terrible truth, and twelve hearts shattered at once. “I’m... I’m afraid I have bad news,” he began. “What is it?” pressed Big Mac, his voice trembling. “She has congestive heart failure.” “Ain’t there anythin’ ya can do?” he asked, almost pleading. Closing his eyes and shaking his head, Dr. Horse replied, “I’m afraid not. She’s very old, and her heart is simply giving out. I’m very sorry.” “How....” Big Mac swallowed, fighting back tears. “How long does she have?” “Hours. A day at most.” The room filled with gasps and a number of whimpers before a long pause settled over the group, with no one sure what to say. At last, Apple Bloom looked up, eyes full of sorrow. “Can we see her?” “Yes. I would recommend seeing her now while she’s still awake.” He stepped aside, and slowly the assembled ponies filed into the hospital room. Twilight followed the rest into the room but stopped short, shocked by the sight before her. An electrocardiogram stood vigil over the bed, registering each faint heartbeat. Almost completely hidden by heavy blankets, only Granny Smith’s head was visible. The color had drained from the mare’s face, leaving her the palest of greens. And her white mane, no longer tied in her trademark bun, ran freely across the pillow and onto the blankets. At the sound of hoofsteps upon the floor, Granny Smith cracked her eyes and forced a weak smile. “It’s so good t’see y’all,” she said in a raspy voice, barely above a whisper. Everypony gathered around the elderly mare, knowing that this would probably be the last time they would see her alive. “Granny...” began Applejack. “Now don’t y’all be frettin’. It’s mah time. Ah’ve made my peace wit that.... But there’s some things Ah need to say. Big Mac....” He leaned in close to hear her words. “Ah’m so proud of you. Ya turned out just like yer pa, big and strong. And you got a real nice fillyfriend, ya’hear?” Sugar Belle smiled as she wiped away tears. “Ah love you Granny,” he said, gingerly reaching down and hugging her. “Ah love you too. Apple Bloom?” The filly approached her grandmare’s side. “Ah need ya ta be strong....” “Granny?” “You’re young, but Ah know you’ve got a great future ’head of ya.” Granny Smith struggled to produce a foreleg and Apple Bloom went in for the hug. “Where’s those friends of yours?” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle joined Apple Bloom at the bedside. “Ah need you two t’be there fer Apple Bloom while Ah’m gone. Can ya do that fer me?” The fillies nodded and Granny Smith’s smile grew slightly wider. She gazed out at the rest of the assembled ponies huddled around her bed. “Ah love y’all like the kin ya are... an’ hope y’all will look after mah family when Ah’m gone.” Receiving confirmations, a dash of color flashed across her face, before it grew grave. “Ah need ta say somethin’ ta Applejack.” After a pause, everyone realized what she meant and they began to depart. Nearly to the door, Apple Bloom turned and darted back to Granny Smith, giving her grandmare one last hug before running out of the room in tears. Twilight found herself the last to leave and, after a reassuring glance to Applejack, stepped outside and pulled the door shut.... Once again, everypony took their seats in the waiting room. Big Mac held Sugar Belle and Apple Bloom close, the three of them drawing support from each other. Pinkie Pie sat motionless, transfixed by the floor. Rainbow Dash did her best to fight back tears, while Rarity wiped her eyes with an embroidered handkerchief. Fluttershy openly wept, and Starlight provided what comfort she could. The door opened, revealing a ragged Applejack. Her eyes wide and her color pale, she had aged several years in a matter of minutes. She closed the door behind her and approached the grieving group. “Is she...?” attempted Apple Bloom. Snapping out of her trance, Applejack looked at her family and shook her head. “She’s just restin’.” After a brief moment, she closed her eyes and quickly glanced away. “Applejack...?” began Twilight. “Oh – uh.... If y’all excuse me, Ah need a minute,” she said. Without further explanation, Applejack turned from everypony and walked down the hall in silence. > Chapter II > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight Sparkle sat in her crystal studying chair. Around her lay stacks of books calling out to be read. But she ignored them all, her face instead buried in Magical Derivations. She studied the complex formula filling two whole pages, composed of all sorts of constants, variables and dimensionless units. Frequently she turned back to earlier chapters to reread important passages or flipped ahead to consult the appendices. Knock! Knock! Twilight lowered the book to find a familiar stallion standing at the door. “Big Mac!” she greeted, masking her surprise by his unexpected visit. “Mornin’ Miss Twilight,” he said in a slow drawl. After a long pause, she asked, “Is everything alright?” Big Mac's face darkened. “Nnope.” Twilight immediately cast the book aside and motioned him to her comfy chair. “Please tell me what’s wrong.” Stopping to inspect the chair, he at last took a seat, his large frame barely able to squeeze between the armrests. He sat there looking at Twilight, apparently attempting to decide what to say. Finally, after an uncomfortable stretch of time, he confided, “Ah’m worried ’bout Applejack.” Twilight’s eyes went wide. “Applejack? What’s wrong with her?” “She’s not actin’ like herself... not since the funeral.” “It has hit her pretty hard,” she noted. Big Mac shook his head. “No. Ah remember how she was after our folks died... an’ when Grand Pear passed. This is different.” Leaning forward, Twilight prompted, “What do you mean?” “She’s hardly said two words the last three weeks. Ah talk more ’n her, an’ that’s sayin’ somethin’. An’ she’s always out workin’ in the fields or the orchards. ’Cept for breakfast an’ supper... when she feels like eatin’.” Twilight gasped, “She’s not eating?” “Some meals she eats, others... she just pokes at her food an’ says she ain’t hungry. Ah don’t think she’s starvin’, but she don’t eat like she used to. But after dinner, it’s real strange.” “How so?” urged Twilight, now perched upon the edge of her seat. “She always used to spend time wit’ her family – readin’ a book, playin’ the fiddle or helpin’ Bloom wit’ her homework. But now she goes straight ta bed. Or...” he trailed off. “Yes?” pressed Twilight. “Or she’ll go out an’ watch the sunset then stare at the stars ’til late.” “That doesn’t seem like Applejack at all,” thought Twilight out loud. “Nnope.” “Have you tried talking to her? Let her know you’re worried about her?” Big Mac nodded. “Both me an’ Bloom. But she says nothin’s wrong. We cain’t get anythin’ from her, even when she does talk.” He shook his head in frustration. “It’s like she’s closed herself off from us.” He looked at Twilight, desperation written upon his face. “You bein’ one of her best friends, ah was hopin’ you might’ve heard somethin’.” “No, she hasn’t told me anything.” Twilight leaned back, reflecting on her interactions with Applejack over the past few weeks. “I’ve spoken with her a few times. I’ve invited her out to several things me and the girls do, but she always says she’s too busy.” “That ain’t an excuse. It’s not much busier than before.” “I thought she just needed time to grieve. How could I have not noticed?” She slumped in her chair. Big Mac asked, “What are we goin’ ta do?” Twilight thought for a while, then sat up straight with a look of determination. “I’ll talk with the other girls and ask if they know something or if they’ve seen anything.” She reached over and put a reassuring hoof on his. “Trust me, we’ll get to the bottom of this and help Applejack.” Big Mac returned a weak smile. “You’ll be the first to know when I find out something.” “Thank ya kindly, Miss Twilight.” He rose from his chair and headed for the door. “Thank you for coming. I– I just didn’t realize how serious things were.” Big Mac merely nodded then left the room. > Chapter III > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Carousel Boutique seemed like the logical place to start. Rarity lived the closest to the castle, just a few minutes’ walk away. As the only other member of the close-knit circle of friends to grow up in Ponyville, she had also known Applejack the longest. And finally, Twilight remembered the two friends shared weekly spa visits, so the unicorn might know something that could shed light on this worrisome situation. Ding-ding! A jingling bell announced Twilight’s arrival to the shop. A voice greeted from another room, “Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where every garment is chic....” Rarity entered the room. “...Uni – oh. Hello Twilight.” “Hello Rarity.” “To what do I owe this unexpected visit? Here for a new seasonal outfit? Ooh – I’ve come up with the most elegant design for your Grand Galloping Gala dress. You will look absolutely fabulous!” Smiling, she levitated a measuring tape and stepped towards Twilight. “No – I’m actually here to talk about... Applejack.” Rarity’s smile vanished. “I see.” Pausing for a moment of thought, she suggested, “Perhaps some tea, dear?” “Yes, thank you.” Twilight followed Rarity into the kitchen and sat down at the table. The unicorn set a kettle upon the stove before taking a seat opposite her friend. “How was your weekly spa visit with Applejack?” began Twilight. “...We didn’t have one.” “You didn’t?” Rarity sighed, “We haven’t spent any time at the spa since before....” “Granny Smith passed away?” finished Twilight. “Yes,” Rarity reluctantly confirmed. “Why?” “Believe me, I’ve invited Applejack several times, but she says she’s too busy. She said now that there’s only three of them, there’s more work for each of them to do.” “You don’t sound too convinced.” Rarity shook her head, “No.” A lull hung over the two before she lamented, “I wish she would come with me. Poor dear’s been through a lot lately. I really think it’d do her some good to get her mind off of things and relax for a while.” Twilight pondered what her friend had said. “How would you describe Applejack when you last saw her?” “She’s – changed.” “How so?” “Applejack has always been one of the friendliest of ponies. Well, maybe not as much as Pinkie Pie, but then again Pinkie is in a league all her own. Applejack’s always been very warmhearted and ready to drop what she’s doing to help a friend. But now she seems....” “Closed off?” “Hmm. I would say detached. It’s more like she’s avoiding something.... I’ve seen it before.” “You mean after the Canterlot Rodeo?” “No... after her parents’ deaths.” Seeing her friend’s face darken, she gently encouraged, “Rarity?” Squeee!!!!!! Rarity turned and trotted over to the steaming kettle while Twilight released a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. Though most everypony knew the truth, the story of the tragedy caused such heartache and pain that it was hardly ever alluded to, let alone discussed, in the presence of any member of the Apple family. Rarity had confidentially related the facts shortly after the defeat of Nightmare Moon, before Twilight broached the taboo topic and put her hoof in her mouth. A loaded tray set upon the table, snapping Twilight out her thoughts. She added milk into her tea as Rarity mixed several sugar cubes and a large serving of honey to her brew. The unicorn levitated her cup and took a long sip, seemingly lost in the past. Eventually she came back to the present and reluctantly resumed her story. “In those days, Applejack and I weren’t very close. We were in the same class, so we saw each other almost every day. But we had different interests and friends, so the two of us almost never socialized outside of school.” Rarity paused, the silence betraying regret. Finally, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes, steeling herself for what came next. Her voiced cracked, “It was so heartbreaking to see her come to school the day after the funeral....” “How did Applejack react?” Rarity took another slow sip from her cup. “I – I suppose she acted as one might expect. She was very distraught having just lost both her parents – crying when she thought no one was looking – and sometimes she became very angry. I did what I could to console her.... I think that is when we started really becoming friends. But,” she gazed off again, “Applejack left Ponyville shortly thereafter.” “For Manehattan?” “Yes, dear. She told me that she wanted to try the high-society life and was going to stay with her Aunt and Uncle Orange. At the time I believed her but looking back I think she just wanted to get away. Everything reminded her of her parents, and for a traumatized filly of such a tender age, that can be overwhelming.” Rarity straightened up and forced a smiled, though her voice was still pained. “But we all know how it turned out: Rainbow Dash’s sonic rainboom led to us all earning our cutie marks and Applejack returned to her family at Sweet Apple Acres.” Twilight absentmindedly drank her tea as she considered this new revelation. After sitting in silence for a long time, Rarity assured her friend, “I don’t think she’ll run off to Manehattan again. She loves it here. I cannot imagine Applejack leaving her family and farm.” “Still, I’m concerned. It would be one thing for her to be distant with us... but her brother and sister?” “What makes you say that?” “Big Mac came by the castle earlier. He was really worried about Applejack.” Rarity leaned forward over the table. “What did he say?” Twilight bit her lip, unsure how much of their conversation to reveal. “He said she doesn’t talk much and spends most of the time by herself.” Rarity sat up again, adding yet more sugar to her tea. “Something is very wrong indeed. Perhaps we should go talk to her?” Twilight looked down at her empty cup. “Well, first I’d like to talk with the other girls and ask if they’ve seen the same thing. Once we know everything, we can come up with a way to help Applejack.” “I... suppose that would be prudent. I’ll be right here for when you need me.” “We’ll help her get through this,” Twilight assured, rising from her seat. “We can’t let her carry this burden alone. As her friends, we must do everything we can to help her through this.” “I’ll let you know when I have something.” “Thank you, dear.” Rarity took another long sip of her tea as she became lost in thought once again. Twilight left Carousel boutique, the bell announcing her departure. Walking down one of the main streets of Ponyville, she ran into many of the townsfolk. It seemed everypony wanted to talk with the Princess of Friendship this morning. Though she would stop and chat for a moment to be polite, she refused to become sidetracked from her mission. Twilight pressed onward to her next destination – the whimsically decorated Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie Pie’s manifesto declared it her mission to make everypony smile, so she likely had frequented Sweet Apple Acres over the past few weeks. And given the fact that she was a cousin – well, a possible cousin – Applejack could have discussed matters with her. Though, on the other hoof, if Applejack hadn’t said anything to her own brother and sister, it was unlikely she would have confided anything to Pinkie. Still, if the sacred oath of a Pinkie Promise had been invoked, Applejack might have opened up. And even if Pinkie wasn’t at liberty to divulge anything, it would relieve Twilight to know that Applejack hadn’t completely closed herself off from everypony. Opening the door, Twilight became overwhelmed by a rush of wonderful, mouth-watering scents. Before her the shop overflowed with cakes, pies, muffins, doughnuts, and every other imaginable sweet treat known in Equestria. Everything was either frosted, glazed, chocolate-covered or candy-coated. Twilight’s stomach demanded food with an emphatic growl. “Hello?” she called out to the empty shop. The kitchen door swung opened and a pink mare, mane fluffy like cotton candy, bounced into the room. “Hiya Twilight,” she beamed. “Hi Pinkie.” “I’ve got free samples today!” Twilight eagerly approached the counter. “You do?” “Yep. I’ve been experimenting in the kitchen again.” Twilight stopped dead in her tracks. “Have you been making strawberry cinnamon cilantro cupcakes?” Pinkie giggled. “I will never bake those again!” “Whew.” “Today I made banana avocado jalapeño muffins,” she proudly proclaimed. Twilight suddenly lost her appetite. “Oh. I – just had tea with Rarity.” “Hmm. Everypony who’s come in today has turned them down – except for Derpy. Oh well, I’m sure more ponies will want to try them. So, what’s up? Besides the sky!” she giggled. “Have you been by Sweet Apple Acres lately?” “Oh yes. I know how sad the Apples have been, and I wanted to cheer them up. I’ve taken over cakes and muffins and fresh bread and pies – but not apple pies, they bake the best apple pies in Equestria after all!” “How did they react?” “Big Mac and Apple Bloom were always very happy to see me.” “And Applejack?” “She was always too busy to talk to me.” “She was?” “Yeah. I would go out to the orchards and I tried everything I could think of to cheer her up: singing, dancing, telling jokes, helping with chores – I’m really terrible at bucking apple trees, by the way – but nothing worked. I haven’t seen a case of the frownies this bad since Cranky Doodle came to Ponyville. Ooh!” She began signing: ♪ Cranky Doodle went to town, Looking for a pony. There he found his one true love, Now it’s matrimony! ♫ “That’s – actually pretty good.” “Thanks. Though I can’t figure out what the tune is.” Twilight rolled her eyes as she returned to the topic at hoof. “Pinkie, did Applejack tell you anything?” “No... should she have?” the pink mare asked, sticking a batter-covered beater into her mouth. “I was just hoping she might have opened up to you about what’s going on.” Pulling the beater out of her mouth, Pinkie asked, “What’s going on?” “Well....” Twilight did her best to hide her emotions, but her concern shone through. “Is something wrong with Applejack?” “I....” Twilight didn’t want to alarm her friend, but she didn’t want to lie either. “I don’t know. Ever since the funeral, she’s been isolating herself – working all the time and refusing to spend time with her friends. I – Rarity and I are getting concerned.” “We should go talk to her right now!” Pinkie bounced forward then froze in mid-air. “Oh, but I can’t. I’m watching Pound and Pumpkin and they’re upstairs napping.” She floated down to the floor like a feather. “That’s alright. I want to talk with Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash first.” “Okay. I’ll be sure to ask everypony I see if they know anything.” “No!” Pinkie returned a shocked expression while Twilight paused so as to speak with a calmer voice. “I don’t want this to get beyond us. If a lot of ponies start streaming into Sweet Apple Acres wanting to talk to her, it could make things worse.” “Oh. Okay.” “I’ll come get you when I need you. Right now I’m going to talk with Fluttershy.” “Ooh.” Pinkie’s face suddenly lit up and she bounced into the kitchen. A moment later she returned carrying a brown paper bag. “Here’s three banana avocado jalapeño muffins – one for Fluttershy, one for Rainbow Dash, and one for you when you get hungry.” Twilight forced a smile and reluctantly took the bag. “Thanks. I’ll see you later,” she said, turning towards the door. “Bye.” Twilight left Sugarcube Corner and trotted down the street. Though she really hadn’t expected to get anything from Pinkie Pie, their conversation confirmed just how serious the situation was with Applejack. Now it was time to talk with Fluttershy. Twilight fervently hoped that the pegasus would know something. Fluttershy’s sweet and kind nature, known for taming the wildest and most ferocious beasts in Equestria, had often soothed ponies’ pain and in the process she had repeatedly served as a shoulder to cry upon. There was a chance that Applejack had talked with Fluttershy. Knock! Knock! After a moment, the door opened. “Hello Twilight.” “Good afternoon Fluttershy. Are you busy?” “No, no. Please come in. I’m glad you’re here, actually. I really wanted to talk to you.” Stepping inside, Twilight took a seat on the sofa while Fluttershy sat in her beloved armchair. “What did you want to talk about?” Fluttershy’s face fell. “I’m... I’m worried about Applejack.” Twilight eagerly leaned forward. “Did she tell you something?” Fluttershy shook her head. “No. But I can tell something is very wrong. She’s turned down every offer I’ve made, whether it be for tea, or dinner, or a picnic. And Winona, she’s... depressed. And not just because of Granny Smith. Applejack’s behavior is taking its toll on Winona. I don’t know what to do.” Twilight sat back in her seat. She rubbed her head and sighed, “Big Mac came by the castle this morning. He’s really concerned for his sister. He told me that she’s always working and has shut herself off from everypony, including them.” Fluttershy gasped, but Twilight continued. “I talked with Rarity and Pinkie Pie, and they’ve only confirmed what he told me. I was hoping you might know what’s really going on.” “I’m sorry. Everytime I try to talk to her, Applejack says she’s too busy to chat.” “I doubt she’ll be able to tell me anything, but I still want to talk with Rainbow Dash before seeing Applejack. Thank you for the information.” “I wish I could have been more help. But whatever I can do, please let me know.” “Of course,” said Twilight rising from the sofa. “Oh, by the way, Pinkie sent you a muffin.” She levitated one from the bag over to her friend. “That’s thoughtful of her. What kind is it?” “Banana avocado jalapeño.” Fluttershy gave a disgusted expression, before confirming, “Banana avocado jalapeño?” “Yeah.” “Oh my. Did you have one?” “No, though she sent one along for me.” “Well, uh –” “I know they sound terrible. You don’t have to eat it.” “But I wouldn’t want to hurt Pinkie Pie’s feelings.” “I don’t want you to get sick either. What about those strawberry cinnamon cilantro cupcakes she made?” Fluttershy’s face turned green. “I still remember the taste – and aftertaste.” “Perhaps one of your animals would like it?” Fluttershy shook her head. “Oh, I couldn’t do that to any of my animals.” After a pause, unsure what to suggest to her friend, Twilight said, “Well, I really need to go talk with Rainbow Dash. I’ll stop by later after I know something.” “Thank you.” Twilight left the cottage, now more worried than ever. She desperately wanted to go straight to Sweet Apple Acres and confront Applejack, to get the truth straight from the horse’s mouth. But she determined the best course of action was to follow through with her original plan and talk with all her friends first. Now only one remained.... Rainbow Dash was the most stubborn pony – well, second most stubborn after Applejack – in Ponyville. If she had picked up that something was wrong with Applejack, she likely wouldn’t have let it go until getting an answer. Twilight desperately hoped that Rainbow would know something – anything. But based on the earlier conversations, the odds weren’t good. A few minutes later Twilight stood before Rainbow Dash’s cloudominium. She knocked on the door and waited... nothing. She knocked again... still nothing. Finally she banged on the door. After a long pause the knob turned and the door slowly swung open to reveal a disheveled Rainbow Dash. Yawn! “What the hay Twilight? It’s my naptime.” “Rainbow Dash, I need to talk with you.” “Yeah, I kinda figured,” she deadpanned. Deciding the direct approach best, Twilight asked, “Over the past few weeks, have you noticed anything wrong with Applejack?” “No. But I’ve been spending a lot of time at Wonderbolts practice getting ready for the new season. The few times I’ve flown over to Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack’s been busy working. Why, what’s going on?” “I don’t know exactly. She’s closed herself off from everypony. Big Mac says she hardly talks or spends time with her family. I spoke with Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie, and they’ve all noticed the same thing. Something’s definitely wrong.” “Let’s grab the others and go talk to her!” Rainbow leapt into the air, only to be enveloped in a purple aura that set her gently back on the cloud. “No Rainbow Dash!” The pegasus’s wings flared. “What! If something’s wrong, we can’t sit around and do nothing! Applejack needs our help!” “We’re not going to do nothing. I’m going to talk with her right now, one-on-one.” “Hey, I’m her friend too.” “I know, but it’s often easier to open up to one pony than five. If she feels we’re ganging up on her, it’ll only make things worse.” Rainbow Dash refolded her wings. “I guess you’re right,” she reluctantly agreed, though still annoyed at not being able to jump right into action. Twilight put a hoof on Rainbow Dash’s shoulder. “I know you want to help. Don’t worry, once I know what’s going on, I’ll let you all know and we can come up with some plan to help her.” “Thanks Twilight.” “Oh, before I go to see Applejack, Pinkie wanted me to give you something....” > Chapter IV > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight soared high over Sweet Apple Acres. From this vantage point she could see all of the farm spread out before her. The forest of apple trees stretched nearly to the horizon, their canopies bathed in the light of a late-afternoon sun. Some had already been harvested, but many still offered an abundance of apples ripe for the picking. Elsewhere fields of corn, wheat and oats grew tall, and beyond them lay pastures filled with luscious green grass. Suddenly she caught sight of a large wagon overflowing with red apples. Though she couldn’t observe who was pulling, flashes of a brown stetson hat clearly identified the harnessed pony as Applejack. As the wagon disappeared into the barn, Twilight gradually descended and touched down just before the door. Taking a final deep breath to prepare herself for the challenge ahead, she slowly entered. “Applejack?” she called out. Poking her head out from behind the cart, Applejack replied, “Twilight,” before returning to work. Her tone wasn’t friendly, nor was it hostile; it was merely an acknowledgement of Twilight’s presence. Twilight walked around to the other side of the cart. “Applejack, we need to talk.” “Ah’m kinda busy unloading this here wagon.” “Your work can wait,” she insisted. “Nope. Ah’ve gotta sort these apples b’fore the market opens in the mornin’.” Applejack resumed sorting the apple varieties into different baskets. Twilight ignored her friend’s rebuff. “This is important.” “Is Chrysalis back?” Taken aback, she replied, “No –” “Is Equestria under attack again?” “No, why –” “Is somepony in danger?” “No, but –” “Have we been summoned by Princess Celestia?” “No, it’s –” “Then it ain’t that important. Ah’ve got ta get ready for the market. Some of us have a business ta run.” Frustrated by her friend’s dismissal, Twilight took a breath to calm down. She lit her horn, gently closing the the barn door and leaving the two ponies alone together. “Applejack, I’m – we’re... concerned. All of us. We’ve noticed how you’ve been acting lately.” “What’s that supposed ta mean?” “Well, you spend all your time working and haven’t joined us –” “Now don’t ya go frettin’. Just because I don’t come to y’all’s parties or picnics don’t mean that somethin’s a matter.” “Applejack, it’s not just your friends that are worried.... Big Mac came to see me earlier today.” The farm pony stopped unloading the wagon but did not look up. “He’s really worried for you.” “Ah’m fine,” she insisted, then began dragging a basket full of apples towards a smaller cart. Twilight levitated the basket and carefully set it down inside the cart used for hauling produce to market. “Applejack, he says that you hardly speak to them –” “He’s one to talk.” “And you spend most of your time alone.” “So?” “Applejack, something’s really bothering you –” “No.” “I can see it.” “Nope.” “Ever since Granny Smith –” Applejack spun around and stood muzzle-to-muzzle with Twilight. “Nothing’s wrong! Ya ’hear!” Twilight stumbled backwards. “Applejack – this – this isn’t like you,” she stuttered. The anger in Applejack’s face disappeared and she turned to face the far end of the barn. She hung her head low and slumped, seeming to carry the weight of the world on her back. “Maybe Ah’m not the pony ya know,” she muttered. “What?” asked a confused Twilight. “Nothin’,” she quickly replied. Twilight stepped forward and placed a hoof on her friend’s shoulder. “Please Applejack. I want to help.” “There’s – there’s nothin’ ya can do.” “You don’t know that.” “Yes, Ah do.” “Talk to me AJ. Help me understand what’s going on.” Applejack merely shook her head. “I know you’re in a lot of pain and I want to help. I’m your friend, Applejack – you can tell me anything.” The two just stood there in silence for a long time. Then the farm pony took a deep breath then let out a long, slow sigh. “Do... do ya promise that ya won’t tell nopony?” “I Pinkie Promise,” Twilight said, giving a hopeful smile as she went through the absurd routine to bind her pledge, but Applejack didn’t notice. After a long pause, Twilight gently urged, “Applejack?” “uhmnnanannapll.” “I couldn’t understand you.” “ahmananannapel.” “I still can’t –” Applejack turned, tears filling her eyes. “Ah’m not an Apple!” Twilight blinked. “What?” Applejack hung her head low again. “Ah’m... Ah’m not an Apple, Twi.” “Of course you’re an Apple. You’ve got a brother and sister who care for you –” “They’re not mah family... not mah real one.” “Applejack?” The farm pony turned back to gaze at the far wall, as if she was looking into the past. “That’s what Granny Smith told me on her deathbed. Ah ain’t an Apple. One day pa found me in a basket sittin’ on the front porch. No note or nothin’. They tried ta find out where Ah came from. But when they couldn’t find mah real parents, they decided to raise me. They got a birth certificate fer me, so as far as anypony knows Ah’m a real Apple.” “You are a real Apple. Just ask Big Mac.” “He doesn’t know.” “He doesn’t?” “No. He was pretty young when Ah came along... way too young ta know where foals come from. As he grew older, he just assumed Ah came along in the normal way.... Nopony knows, ’cept the two of us.” “Applejack, I – I –” “Ah know. Ah’ve been livin’ a lie.” “You didn’t know.” “Doesn’t matter. All this time, Ah thought Ah was an Apple. But – who am I?” “Would you like me to help you find out?” Applejack jerked her head up. “What?” “Maybe I could help you discover who your birth parents are.” “Ah don’t think ya can – not after all this time.” “I don’t know, but I can try.” Applejack thought for a while, then sighed. “Ah don’t know. Ah mean, Ah don’t really know if Ah want ta meet them. They left me, Twi. Ah love the Apples, but...sniff – why did mah parents abandon me?” She began to cry and Twilight wrapped her in a caring embrace. “What kind of ponies abandon their foal to strangers?” “I don’t know, Applejack. But I do know one thing – they chose a good family to raise you.” “Yeah. Yer right.” “I don’t know if I can find them, but if I do, you don’t have to meet them. But knowing who they are might bring you some closure.” “Thanks for being here for me.” Twilight squeezed Applejack tightly. “Always.” > Chapter V > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Knock! Knock! Twilight stepped back and waited. Within seconds came the sound of approaching hoofsteps on a wooden floor before the door swung open to reveal Apple Bloom staring up at the alicorn. “Twilight!?” greeted the filly. “Hello Apple Bloom. I’m here to see Applejack. Is she home?” “Yeah, just a moment.” The filly darted out of sight followed by hoofsteps pounding up the stairs. A short time later came heavier hoofsteps descending the staircase and Applejack arrived at the front door. “Hello Applejack,” Twilight said calmly. “Twilight,” replied the farm pony, friendlier than the last time but still guarded. “I was hoping we could talk, privately.” “Oh, sure. Let’s – uh – go to the barn.” Applejack stepped outside, Twilight closing the front door before following her friend. The two walked in silence the short distance to the red barn, where Applejack opened the door to allow the two to enter before closing it firmly shut behind them. The interior was an eerie yellow twilight, illuminated only by rays of golden sunshine pouring through gaps in the siding. “So – uh, what didja want ta talk about?” She began nervously rubbing the back of her neck. “I told you I’d help you find out who your parents are.” “It’s only been five days, Twi. You’ve found them already?” Twilight could hear the mix of emotions – fear, hope, sadness – in her friend’s voice. “No.” Applejack slumped in disappointment. “But I am making progress. I’ve researched the basket you were left in and made some interesting discoveries. It’s helped me narrow down the possibilities of your hometown.” “Really?” “Yes, but that can only take me so far. I came because I think you could help me identify your parents.” “How? Ah already told ya all Ah know.” “A few weeks ago, when I was searching through the restricted section of the Canterlot Library with Sunset Shimmer, I came across an ancient book of memory spells. Princess Celestia has given me special permission to use them.” The farmer cocked her head. “‘Special permission’? Is it dangerous?” Twilight’s head jerked back in surprise. “No, no. Not anymore than teleporting. It’s just that certain memory spells are... illegal.” “Illegal?” “Memories are something intensely personal. To search them without a pony’s consent is an invasion of privacy. That’s why the books are locked up and the spells’ usage strictly regulated.” Applejack paused to consider Twilight’s words. “So, yer tellin’ me that the Princess herself gave you permission to use one on me?” “Well, we both felt it was the best way to find your parents.” Applejack recoiled at the admission. “Ya told her? Ya told the princess Ah’m not an Apple? Ya Pinkie Promised!” “No, no,” assured Twilight. “I didn’t tell her that. I merely said that there’s something extremely important – extremely private – you’ve forgotten that we really need you to remember. Once I explained that, she agreed as long as I got your permission first.” Applejack calmed down, but still had an air of worry. “So, what does this here spell do?” “It will allow me to see your memories. I can search for an early memory of your birth parents.” “Ah don’t know Twi. It was such a long time, there’s liable not ta be anything left of them in here,” Applejack said, tapping her head for emphasis. “It’s the best option I have at the moment, short of running paternity tests on half of Equestria.” “Yeah, Ah can understand that. Well, if ya think there’s a chance, Ah’m willing to give it a try. What do Ah need ta do?” “First, you need to clear your mind. Close your eyes.” Applejack hesitantly complied. “Forget everything else. Feel the sun’s rays fall upon you. Listen to the wind outside the barn. Focus on your breathing. Exist only in this moment.” After giving the farmer a minute of peace, Twilight instructed, “Open your mind.” She focused her magic into the tip of her horn, forming a small rose-colored ball of aura. “Your mind to my mind.” Twilight closed her eyes and leaned forward, touching her horn against Applejack’s forehead. Twilight could feel Applejack’s memories. Hundreds – no thousands of individual strands twisted about each other in the matrix, weaving together a great mass in her friend’s mind. But Twilight didn’t know where to start. She had never attempted to navigate another pony’s mind before, and the archives noted that everypony was unique. Any of these strands could be what she was looking for. Hesitantly, she reached out to a prominent memory.... “Applejack?” came a familiar voice. Poking her head out from behind the cart, Twilight acknowledged, “Twilight,” before returning to work. “Applejack, we need to talk.” Ah really don’t want ta talk, Twilight. Ah just want ta be alone. “Ah’m kinda busy unloading this here wagon.” “Your work can wait.” Please leave me alone. Ah ain’t in the mood ta talk. “Nope. Ah’ve gotta sort these apples b’fore the market opens in the mornin’.” Twilight resumed sorting the apple varieties into different baskets, doing her best to ignore the alicorn standing a few feet away. “This is important.” Ya just cain’t take a hint, can ya? “Is Chrysalis back?” “No –” Came a confused reply. “Is Equestria under attack again?” “No, why –” “Is somepony in danger?” “No, but –” “Have we been summoned by Celestia?” “No, it’s –” “Then it ain’t that important. Ah’ve got ta get ready for the market. Some of us have a business ta run.” Ah don’t mean ta be rude, but ya won’t take a hint and leave me alone. And Ah really do have ta get ready fer tomorrow. The barn door gently closed. Twilight felt an intense anxiety about what the alicorn was about to say, her stomach tying itself into knots. “Applejack, I’m – we’re... concerned. All of us. We’ve noticed how you’ve been acting lately.” “What’s that supposed ta mean?” Twilight demanded. How Ah’m actin’ ain’t none of your business. “Well, you spend all your time working and haven’t joined us –” “Now don’t ya go frettin’. Just because I don’t come to y’all’s parties or picnics don’t mean that somethin’s a matter.” Blunt, but Ah can’t let her know what’s really going on. “Applejack, it’s not just your friends that are worried.... Big Mac came to see me earlier today.” Big Mac came ta see Twilight! He must really be worried. How much did he tell her? “He’s really worried for you.” “Ah’m fine.” Twilight began dragging a basket full of apples towards a smaller cart, only for it to be taken away by a magical aura. “Applejack, he says that you hardly speak to them –” “He’s one to talk.” “And you spend most of your time alone.” “So?” “Applejack, something’s really bothering you –” “No.” “I can see it.” “Nope.” “Ever since Granny Smith –” A dagger plunged straight into Twilight’s heart. Without thinking she spun around and stood muzzle-to-muzzle with the alicorn. “Nothing’s wrong! Ya ’hear!” she spat, every word full of venom. The alicorn’s pupils shrunk to pinpricks as she stumbled backwards. “Applejack – this – this isn’t like you,” she stuttered, failing to hide the fear in her voice. Ah scared her! She’s afraid of me! Mah best friend – Twilight turned and hung her head low in shame. “Maybe Ah’m not the pony ya know.” “What?” asked the alicorn. “Nothin’.” Twilight could feel a hoof on her shoulder. “Please Applejack. I want to help.” No. Ya cain’t fix this Twi! There ain’t enough magic in all of Equestria ta fix this! “There’s – there’s nothin’ ya can do.” “You don’t know that.” “Yes, Ah do.” “Talk to me AJ. Help me understand what’s going on.” Twilight shook her head. Ah cain’t tell ya. It hurts too much ta even think ’bout. “I know you’re in a lot of pain and I want to help. I’m your friend, Applejack – you can tell me anything.” Ah don’t want ta talk about it. Ah really don’t. How can Ah tell her? How can Ah tell anypony? What ’bout mah family? But they’re not mah family, are they? How would they react if they knew? What would they say? All these years, Apple Bloom’s been lookin’ up ta me as her big sister. Ah practically raised her. An’ Big Mac. He ain’t mah big brother. He’s... well, he’s just a stallion Ah grew up with. They aren’t mah family. But Ah ain’t got nopony else. Ah don’t know what ta do.... Twilight took a deep breath then let out a long, slow sigh. “Do... do ya promise that ya won’t tell anypony?” “I Pinkie Promise.” It’s not too late. Ah could tell her something – anything – an’ she won’t know the difference. But, she’s expectin’ the truth. Ah’d be lyin’. Ah’m not a liar. But Ah don’t really know who Ah am. “Applejack?” “uhmnnanannapll.” “I couldn’t understand you.” “ahmananannapel.” “I still can’t –” Twilight turned to the alicorn, but everything blurred into unrecognizable shapes. “Ah’m not an Apple!” “What?” Just saying the words left Twilight weak. She hung her head low again, feeling tears run down her cheeks. “Ah’m... Ah’m not an Apple, Twi.” “Of course you’re an Apple. You’ve got a brother and sister who care for you –” “They’re not mah family... not mah real one.” “Applejack?” Twilight turned to gaze at the far wall. She fought back tears, struggling to hold herself together when she felt on the verge of completely breaking down. The armor that shielded her had been torn away, leaving her vulnerable. “That’s what Granny Smith told me on her deathbed. Ah ain’t an Apple. One day pa found me in a basket sittin’ on the front porch. No note or nothin’. They tried ta find out where Ah came from. But when they couldn’t find mah real parents, they decided to raise me. They got a birth certificate fer me, so as far as anypony knows Ah’m a real Apple.” “You are a real Apple. Just ask Big Mac.” “He doesn’t know.” “He doesn’t?” “No. He was pretty young when Ah came along... way too young ta know where foals come from. As he grew older, he just assumed Ah came along in the normal way.... Nopony knows, ’cept the two of us.” “Applejack, I – I –” “Ah know. Ah’ve been livin’ a lie.” “You didn’t know.” “Doesn’t matter. All this time, Ah thought Ah was an Apple. But – who am I?” “Would you like me to help you find out?” “What?” “Maybe I could help you discover who your birth parents are.” “Ah don’t think ya can – not after all this time.” “I don’t know, but I can try.” Could she really find mah parents? This is Twilight. The one who’s forgotten more about magic than I’ll ever learn. The one who’s practically a walkin’ encyclopedia. If anypony can, she can. But.... Do Ah really want ta meet mah parents? They abandoned me and never checked up on me. They’ve never wanted ta be part of mah life. Why should Ah go lookin’ fer them? “Ah don’t know. Ah mean, Ah don’t really know if Ah want ta meet them. They left me, Twi. Ah love the Apples, but...sniff – why did mah parents abandon me?” As she began to sob, Twilight felt a gentle embrace from the alicorn. “What kind of ponies abandon their foal to strangers?” “I don’t know, Applejack. But I do know one thing – they chose a good family to raise you.” “Yeah. Yer right,” Twilight replied. “I don’t know if I can find them, but if I do, you don’t have to meet them. But knowing who they are might bring you some closure.” “Thanks for being here for me.” Twilight felt the alicorn squeeze her tightly, comforting and calming her, more than words ever could. “Always.” Twilight hit a juncture and tore free of the memory, returning to the matrix. She steadied herself and refocused. The whole experience had been... disorienting. She knew that she’d be reliving Applejack’s memories, but she didn’t realize she’d be experiencing them firsthoof. Never did she expect to argue with herself – literally. But this was Applejack’s memory. Everything Applejack saw, everything Applejack heard, everything Applejack smelled and tasted, everything Applejack felt.... Twilight suddenly realized just how difficult the conversation had been for her friend. She could still feel Applejack’s broken heart and wounded soul, a sorrow that could not be conveyed in words but only understood by experiencing it. Maybe finding Applejack’s parents would help; maybe not. But Twilight knew she had to at least try. She reached out to another strand.... Twilight leaned back unchewing an apple while Granny Smith tap-danced by her. “And so Ah tried to defeat Discord, but none of mah so-called ‘friends’ would lift a hoof to help me.” A voice interrupted Twilight’s relaxation. “Applejack, I'm here to fight for our friendship!” Big Mac popped up from a hole in the ground and promptly licked the unicorn. “Oh, now you want to fight. Where you went when Ah was battlin' Discord?” Twilight began punching an imaginary draconequus before getting thrown to the ground by the unicorn. “Snap out of it. This isn't you! You're not a liar.” The unicorn lit her horn and touched it to Twilight’s forehead, instantly flooding her mind with memories of her friends. Dazed, Twilight shook her head, “Wh-what happened? Twilight! Ah saw a vision of us feudin' and fightin'. Ah couldn't face the truth, so Ah started tellin' lies. Can you ever forgive me?” “I already have. Come on!” Breaking free of the memory, Twilight returned to the matrix. The books warned her about this: Applejack’s subconscious, feeling another’s presence, tried to be helpful by guiding Twilight to shared memories. Though well-intentioned, it would make Twilight’s job much more difficult. She focused hard, trying to find memory strands that were not at the forefront of Applejack’s mind.... Twilight watched her friends and family depart the hospital room. Nearly to the door, Apple Bloom turned and darted back to Granny Smith, giving her grandmare one last hug before running out of the room in tears. The alicorn was the last to leave, offering a reassuring smile before gently pulling the door shut, leaving the two mares alone together. Twilight gazed down at her grandmother, a mare she had looked up to all her life. Granny Smith lay weak and frail, the fire that once burned in her eyes nearly extinguished. But even now, at the very end, she still set the example to follow. The elderly mare accepted her mortality and prepared for a dignified death. “Applejack...?” she wheezed. “Ah’m here Granny?” Twilight leaned in, hanging on every word. “There’s somethin’ Ah need ta tell ya....” What little remaining color drained from her face. “Somethin’ Ah should ’ave told ya a long time ago.” “Yes?” “It won’t be easy t’hear.” She gazed up, her eyes filling with regret. “Granny?” Twilight could see the pain in her grandmare’s eyes as she battled to get the words out. “You’re....” She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly. “It’s okay –” “No!” she gasped. She took a labored breath and struggled to reach out to her granddaughter. “Ah ’ave ta tell ya.... Ya have ta know the truth. You’re... you’re...” Her sorrowful eyes stared deeply into Twilight’s. “...adopted.” Her outstretched foreleg fell back onto the bed. “Adopted!” No! It cain’t be. Ah cain’t be adopted. Ah’m an Apple! She’s delirious or somethin’! “Ah’m sorry sugarcube,” she apologized. “Ah know yer hurtin’, but cain’t wait no longer.... Ah’m the only one left who knows.” She closed her eyes again, fighting for breath and time. “It was a few years after Mac was born. Yer pa found a basket on the front porch one mornin’.... Ya know the one... in the attic?” Twilight nodded. “Ya were the most precious foal.” Granny Smith longingly gazed at her granddaughter. “We tried ta find ya’s parents.... But we couldn’t. No note or nothin’.” She ever so slowly shook her head. “We decided ta raise ya as our own. We registered ya as Applejack Apple... daughter of Bright Mac and Buttercup... cause that’s what ya were.... We all luved ya as any other Apple.” Granny Smith sighed, “Ah’m sorry Ah didn’t tell ya sooner. Yer pa and ma were goin’ ta tell ya, but....” She closed her eyes again. Twilight stood there, dumfounded. There were a million questions to ask and things to say, but her mind was completely blank. She just couldn’t wrap her mind around Granny Smith’s confession. “Ah’m sorry Applejack.... Ah hope ya can fergive me.” Snapping back to the moment, though still at a complete loss, Twilight squeezed the mare’s hoof. “Of course.” She leaned over and kissed Granny Smith on the forehead, the elderly mare returning a weak smile. “Ya somethin’ special Applejack... not blood... but an apple ta the core.” Granny Smith closed her eyes and slumped onto the pillow. “Granny!” cried Twilight. Just barely cracking her eyes, Granny Smith rasped, “Ah’m tired. Ah think Ah’ll take a little rest.” She closed her eyes again. Twilight stumbled out of the memory. Completely drained, she struggled to keep the spell together. She hadn’t wanted to intrude on such a... private memory. But it made sense. Besides shared memories, strong personal memories, especially recent ones, were the easiest to access. And that memory had certainly been a strong personal one. Twilight wasn’t sure how many more of those she could endure, the strain already wearing her down. Still, she reached out.... Twilight pulled back the bush to reveal two trees – one apple and one pear – intertwined in a loving embraced. “Whoa,” uttered Grand Pear. “It's beautiful,” observed Granny Smith. “It's... impossible,” he replied. Twilight smiled. “If anything's gonna make it through, it's apples and pears.” She hugged her family, then stared up at the two living trees. She felt closer to her parents than she had in years.... Twilight once again found herself in the matrix. That memory – it was a one of family. Even though Applejack knew they weren’t her real family, the fact that it was such a strong memory meant Applejack still held tightly to her family. It relieved Twilight to know that her friend hadn’t really cut herself off from her family. Refocusing, Twilight reached out into the depths of Applejack’s mind, to a memory she hoped would get her closer to her goal.... The curtains drew back. Twilight gracefully walked down the catwalk, pausing at the end to show off her beautiful gown. Turning, she strutted back down the runway, hips swaying seductively with each step, then struck a pose worthy of any fashion magazine. “Is this some kind of joke?” demanded Rarity. Using her best Manehattan accent, one cultivated during her time with Aunt and Uncle Orange, Twilight asked, “Why, Rarity, whatever would make you think I was joking?” “Because you would never wear an ensemble like that. You like plowing fields and hauling apples—” declared the unicorn. “And I can like fashion just as much,” countered Twilight as she pushed down Rarity’s straw hat. “But you don't!” “Well, maybe you do not know me as well as you think.” “Fine. But Ah got a whole festival to plan, so if you're goin' to start modelin', just get on with it!” Twilight smiled at her friend’s annoyance. The plan would work as long as she pushed Rarity far enough. “Life is a festival, and you should celebrate it by looking just like me! Because I'm a trend-setting fashionista!” Rarity stood agape. “You're a trend-setting fashionista?! Why, that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever– I mean...” She paused, returning to her faux-country accent. “Good fer you. Ah, on the other hoof, couldn't care less how Ah look, long as Ah get the chores done.” She used her back leg to scratch her mane in a very un-ladylike manner. Twilight descended the stairs and circled her friend. Even though she was irritating Rarity to no end, she couldn’t help but enjoy this a little. “Oh, is that so?” “Yes, indeedy-doodle!” “Not me! My mane needs to be perfectly coiffed at all times.” A frustrated Rarity removed the hat and angrily declared, “Well, my mane is full of dust and split ends!” “My hooves are so polished, you can see your reflection in them,” Twilight said, looking down to see Applejack’s reflection gazing back. “My hooves are cracked and dry from working in the fields!” retorted Rarity. “I'm so fashion-forward.” “I wear droopy drawers!” yelled Rarity. “I smell like rosebuds.” “Ah luv bein’ covered in mud!” She dove face-first into the pigpen, sending mud flying everywhere, including on to Twilight’s gown. Rarity stood in horror at what she’d done. “Goodness! Your couture!” She tried removing the stain with her mud-covered hooves, only to make it far worse. “Ooh, it's bad.” Finally snapping back to her old self, she demanded, “Will somepony bring me a towel to wipe this repulsive filth from my hooves?!” Twilight smiled and threw a foreleg around her friend. “There's the Rarity Ah know!” “Oh, Applejack, I'm sorry I said all those things. You're a true friend who probably knows me better than I know myself. I don't know what I was thinking wearing this ridiculous outfit.” Twilight chuckled, “Ah kinda know how you feel.” “Oh, but you were just trying to help me see how silly I was being. And you were right.” She sighed at the mess she’d made of Applejack’s dress. “Besides, that gown looks just gorgeous on you. I wish I hadn't ruined it.” “Thanks! It's nice, ain't it?” “It's magnificent! Wherever did you get it?” Oh shit. “Oh, it's – uh – one of yours.” Rarity grabbed Spike and ordered, “I'll need three gallons of boiling water and one ounce of detergent, stat!” Well, that wasn’t what she was looking for at all. Still, Twilight couldn’t help mentally chuckling. She wished she had witnessed this stunt at the time. Rarity was definitely in for some friendly teasing, with maybe Applejewel making a reappearance. But wait! Rarity was one of Applejack’s oldest friends. Perhaps she could be the key to finding the lost memory? Twilight followed the thread deeper into Applejack’s memory, finding older similar fibers.... Bright sunshine poured through the open window, filling the bedroom with vibrant light. A gentle breeze rustled the curtains, carrying the sweet smell of apple blossoms. Birds chirped happily in the trees. The outdoors beckoned, calling out to be enjoyed. Instead Twilight sat in silence, alone in her room. A lasso rested idly in her tiny hooves. Practicing rope tricks always made her happy. But today, all she could do was stare at it. She felt no motivation to do anything, especially anything that made her happy. All she wanted to do was just sit by herself and let the day pass by.... Tap! Tap! Twilight looked up to see a filly Rarity standing in the door. “Hello Applejack. May I come in?” she asked. “Sure,” Twilight replied before focusing once more upon the lasso. Rarity walked over and sat down in the chair opposite Twilight. “So, this is your room...?” “Eeyup.” “I’ve never been here before.” “Nnope.” “Well, it’s rather... rustic.” “Eeyup.” “Maybe I can help out? Fashion is my thing. I hope to get my cutie mark in it. Ooh, we could hang some new drapes. Perhaps a new bedspread? And I was thinking –” “Nnope.” “No?” “Ah like mah room the way it is,” Twilight said, never looking up. “Of course, how silly of me.” A long, uncomfortable silence followed. “Is that a lasso?” “Eeyup.” “You do those rope tricks like the cowponies at rodeos?” “Eeyup.” “Ooh! Let’s go outside and you can show me. It is a beautiful day after all.” “Nnope.” “No?” “Ah – Ah don’t wanna go outside.” “Oh.” Another long silence followed. Twilight continued to stare at the rope in her hooves, hoping Rarity would just leave her alone. The lasso became an item of extreme interest. Twilight scrutinized the knot, visualizing tying it over and over again. The rope twisted back and forth around itself, creating the perfect loop knot – loose enough to allow the rope to tighten without effort, yet strong enough to stand up to the worst punishment. Twilight examined the braids, the twists of individual strands creating a durable rope of immense strength, able to take down the biggest of livestock. She counted every stray fiber a dozen times. She remembered practicing with the lasso for hours on end, from fancy tricks to simple roping of the livestock. Every memory of a rope trick she’d even seen performed at a rodeo ran through her mind endlessly. Twilight didn’t know how much time had passed – perhaps an hour – and still the unicorn sat in the chair opposite her, never moving. At last, Twilight couldn’t take it anymore. “Why are ya here? Ya ain’t never come over b’fore.” “I – I was worried.” “Ah’m fine.” “No, you’re not.” “Yeah Ah am.” “Everyday at school, while we’re playing at recess, you just sit there, alone. Just like you’re doing now.” “So?” “I know you’re in pain, dear. I’ve seen you cry –” Twilight jerked up and angrily shouted, “Ah ain’t never cried. Mah folks raised me ta be a strong pony!” Twilight felt ashamed and cast her gaze downwards so she didn’t have to look Rarity in the eye. The scene began to blur, and drops began pattering onto the lasso. Hoofsteps moved across the floor and the bed shifted as another pony sat down. Twilight could feel a gentle embrace around her. “It’s okay dear.” “No it’s not.” Twilight began sniffling, and tears began to flow down her cheeks. “I know it isn’t easy.” Rarity paused for a moment. “Would you like to know something?” “What?” “If it happened to me, I don’t think I’d be as strong as you. I’d cry all the time. But you have something that I don’t.” “What’s that?” “An older brother and grandmare who love you. Your family loves you, Applejack. And so do your friends.” Twilight looked into Rarity’s eyes. “Are we friends?” Rarity pulled her in for a hug. “Of course dear....” Twilight came out of the memory. Rarity had alluded to this, but now she fully understood the depths of her friendship with Applejack. It cast both of them in new light. Though not quite there, Twilight was going in the right direction. She reached out again.... Two coffins. Two plain coffins. Two plain, sealed coffins. Next to her, draped in black stood Granny Smith. The mare exhibited a stern, determined look. On her other side stood a solemn McIntosh, the colt wearing a small suit. Everywhere she looked, Twilight saw Apples dressed in black. Some wept, others stood in silence. Before all of them a large stallion read from a book: “...ashes to ashes, dust to dust...” Twilight tore free of the memory, gasping imaginary air. The pain – the grief. It was overwhelming and all-consuming. She – she wanted to end the spell and return to the barn, try again some other time. But she was getting closer. Could she find her way back to this part of Applejack’s mind again? And if so, would she have to endure everything all over? Twilight wasn’t sure she could bear to go through such painful memories again. Digging further, she found a smaller fiber.... Twilight lay under heavy blankets, burning up. She ached all over and let out several violent coughs. Next to the bed stood a smiling mare. “Mamma –” “Hush now my sweet Applejack.” She kissed Twilight’s forehead and began singing softly, slowly: ♪I know a little filly I see her every day And though it may sound silly She keeps the night away ♫Cause when she cries it’s not some ornamental sigh and when she breathes it brings the world to its knees ♪But when she smiles It’s when she smiles ♫Now she’s the light I long for She’s the light I see Long as the moon rises I’ll have dreams of thee Twilight’s eyelids felt very heavy and the world faded away into darkness. Yes, the memories were getting older. Twilight knew she was close. She continued reaching out, sensing the different strands, searching for the oldest she could find. Then she stopped. Twilight felt a tiny fiber, nothing more than a mere sliver of a memory. Just grasping it in her magic, the fragment threatened to shatter. Twilight would have to reinforce the fragment before attempting to access it. Pulling forth her remaining strength, she added several spells to buttress the memory. Satisfied she had done all she could, she hesitantly entered.... Bright colors – reds, yellows, greens – but most of all blue. Two figures – vague shapes, yet somehow familiar. A mare. A stallion. A sense of happiness – Twilight stumbled backwards and lost her balance, landing flat on her back. Stars swirled overhead while the barn roof spun in place. Her head ached as if a vice was slowly tightening around her skull. It was like being on the most nauseating carnival ride at Pony Island. At length she gazed over to Applejack, lying on her side unconscious. Using all her strength, Twilight rolled on to her hooves and stood up. She took an uneasy step forward and fell face-first into the dirt. Undeterred, Twilight crawled on her belly to her friend, shaking her. “Applejack! Are you okay?” The farm pony groaned and cracked an eye. “Twilight? It’s like Ah’ve been hit in the head with a two-by-four.” “Just rest.” The two mares laid there for a long time, side-by-side, recovering from the ordeal. Finally, still visibly dazed, Applejack sat up. “What happened?” she asked, rubbing her head. “The memory collapsed on me.” “Didja – didja...?” “Yes.” “Ya know who my birth parents are?” “No, I couldn’t see them clearly.” “So, it was all fer nothin’?” sighed Applejack. Twilight shook her head. “I’m not ready to give up. Tomorrow I’m going to go back to the Canterlot Library to do more research.” > Chapter VI > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight walked along the dusty country lane leading to Sweet Apple Acres. Normally she would fly to the farm, but walking was... slower. In fact, she had walked all over town that day. First, she visited Fluttershy to drop off Owlowiscious for some grooming. The pegasus, always happy to have a visitor, insisted on serving tea and the two chatted for most of the morning. Fluttershy talked at length about her success with the new animal sanctuary and her work with the Equestrian Society for the Preservation of Rare Creatures. Twilight asked many questions and urged the pegasus tell her more. During breaks in the conversation, Applejack’s name was mentioned several times, but Twilight found herself too intrigued with Fluttershy’s work to be sidetracked. Next Twilight stopped by Carousel Boutique. Rarity happily measured her friend for a new Grand Galloping Gala gown. Though there were numerous backorders to be worked for the boutiques, not to mention preparing for Manehattan Fashion week, Twilight managed to convince the unicorn to join her at the spa. The two mares spent several hours relaxing, enjoying everything from time in the steam room to full-body massages to hooficures. Rarity naturally inquired about Applejack, but Twilight demurred and instead asked questions about the latest fashion trends from Prance. After the spa, Twilight dropped by Sugarcube Corner for a snack. Pinkie Pie was busy in the kitchen whipping up chocolate-chip cherry seaweed green chili cupcakes and offered free samples to everypony. Twilight politely declined, but did enjoy some banana-nut-fudge brownies. When Pinkie mentioned Applejack, Twilight provided suggestions for potential parties, causing the pink mare to rush to her party-planning cave to make notes. Finally, now that Twilight had no excuse – ahem, task – left, she found herself slowly walking to Sweet Apple Acres. Even so, the trip still took far longer than it should have. She didn’t take that many detours or side trips, and she didn’t stop and talk to every pony she met, but somehow the afternoon seemed to pass by. Twilight stopped, hearing the distinctive Thud! of an applebuck. She veered off the well-worn path and wandered into the orchard, looking for the source. Here the trees were picked clean of fruit. Eventually she came upon Applejack, hauling baskets of fresh apples to an awaiting wagon. “Twilight?” greeted her friend. “Applejack,” responded Twilight, trying to sound as friendly as possible. “Where you’ve been, Twi? Ah ain’t seen you since... well, you know.” “I’ve been in Canterlot the past few days, researching memory spells.” After a long pause, Applejack looked to Twilight and gently urged the alicorn on. “And?” Twilight decided to give a thorough lecture on her research, because none of it would make sense without a long discussion that delved into every detail and addressed every tangent. “And it turns out there’s several spells that can proved helpful. The first one, created by Clover the Clever – remember I played him in the Hearth’s Warming play? – aided in reconstructing memory fragments. And yours was certainly a fragment. Very little to it. As the memory came from you, I had to combine Clover the Clever’s spell with another one from Marelin the Magnificent to make it work. It was a difficult, as one was written in Old Ponish and the other in Middle Ponish. I spent hours translating them into modern Ponish. I used the two spells to reassemble the memory. At least as well as I could. But I still couldn’t see the ponies clearly. So I tried –” “Twi?” “Yes Applejack?” “It’s real interesting an’ all, but is it all really necessary?” “I just wanted to tell you how I went about analyzing your memory.” “Thank ya kindly. But, didja – did ya find my – parents?” Twilight bit her lip and nodded slightly. “And?” Twilight hesitantly reached into her saddlebag and drew forth a manila folder. “The – the results are all right here.” Applejack reached forward, hooves trembling, and grasped the folder. She simply stared at the blank cover for a long time, before reluctantly looking inside. After a moment, her eyes went wide and a look of horror spread across her face. Applejack dropped the folder and stumbled backwards, landing hard on her flank. “No! It cain’t be! Ya cain’t be serious.” Twilight stepped forward and spoke softly. “I’m sorry Applejack. After I reconstructed your memory, they were the ponies I saw.” “But, mah memory – it cain’t! It must be wrong. Mah memory ain’t that good!” Twilight sighed. “I was skeptical too. But it all fits.” “It must be a mistake. Ya could ’ave made a mistake, right?” pleaded Applejack. Twilight shook her head. “I – I ran a paternity test.” Applejack gasped, “Ya can do that?” “Yes, there’s a magical spell that can be used to confirm a pony’s heredity.” “But it could be wrong? Ah mean – no.” “Applejack, I won’t deny that I could be wrong, but the odds –” “What are they?” “I put the odds of me being wrong at, well – smaller than a thousand-to-one.” “Ya sure? Ya absolutely sure ’bout this?” “Yes.” “I wondered who mah parents were, but Ah’d never expected – them!” Applejack removed her stetson and ran a hoof through her mane. Twilight sat down next to her friend. “I know it’s a lot, but I’m here for you Applejack.” The farmer sat in silence for a long time. “Applejack, do you... know what you’re going to do?” Applejack shook her head. “No. If Ah say anthin’, it’s gonna stir up a whole hornet’s nest of trouble.” “There’s nothing wrong with keeping it a secret.” Applejack shook her head again. “Then Ah’d be livin’ a lie.” The two remained quiet, simply staring out into the orchard. At last, Twilight said, “Applejack, it’s your decision, and I’m not going to tell you what to do. But whatever you decide, I’ll be here to support you.” Without another word the two watched the sun set below the horizon. > Chapter VII > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Applejack stared at the front door... a plain, purple door. Nothing special about it. Except, this simple door was all that stood between her and the most dreaded conversation of her life, one that would change everything forever. How long had it had been? Minutes? Hours? She really didn’t know or care how long she’d been standing there. All the way here, she had told herself she could turn around, keep her heritage a secret with nopony the wiser. But here she was, before the front door of her parents’ house. Last chance. Every fiber of her being begged her to run away, to go home and forget the whole thing. Nopony would have to know. She could live her life in ignorant bliss. But then again, the last week had been anything but blissful. Somehow, she found the courage to raise a hoof. Knock! A cold shiver ran down her spine. Still not too late to make a dash for it, hide until the coast was clear and slip back to Ponyville unnoticed. Only with the greatest of determined self-conrol did she stand her ground. On the other side came rumblings, and the knob slowly turned. The die was cast. The door swung open to reveal a middle-aged stallion. “Hello there,” he greeted. For a moment she just stood there, unable to do anything except stare up at him. “Can I help you miss?” he asked. Applejack released a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding and focused on why she had come. “Uh... howdy sir. Ah – Ah was hoping Ah could talk with ya.” “Oh, sure.” Though obviously puzzled, he stepped aside and allowed her to enter. She stepped inside, examining the spacious living room filled with modern furniture and an unusual number of Princess Celestia collectibles. Thud! Applejack nearly jumped out of her skin when the door shut behind her. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, though it still felt like she was walking on eggshells. “Hon, somepony’s here to talk with us,” he called. After a moment a blue pegasus mare emerged from the other room. “Hello,” she greeted. “It’s, uh, nice to meet you,” said Applejack, reaching out a hoof to the mare. “I’m Windy Whistles,” she replied, getting a tepid hoofshake from the farm pony. “And I’m Bow Hothoof,” added the stallion, shaking Applejack’s hoof. “Applejack,” she barely managed to say. “Will you have a seat?” offered Windy, motioning to the closest chair. “Sure.” Applejack took a seat, the two pegasi sitting down next to each other on the couch across from her. Though the distance was only a few feet, it felt like miles separated them. After a long moment of silence, Bow began, “So Applejack, we don’t see too many earth ponies here in Cloudsdale.” Applejack snapped back to the moment. “Oh, uh – Ah’m from Ponyville.” “Ponyville! Then you must know our daughter Rainbow Dash,” exclaimed Windy. “Actually Ah do. She’s mah best friend.” Windy took a long gaze at Applejack. “Wait a minute!” Flying over to a bookcase, Windy pulled forth a large scrapbook and began rifling through it. “I thought you looked familiar.” Applejack’s heart pounded in her chest as her breathing grew shallower. She felt she might experience a full-blown Twilight meltdown. The pegasus produced a newspaper clipping heralding the rescue of Princess Celestia and the defeat of Nightmare Moon. “You’re one of the Elements of Harmony.” “Yes ma’am,” Applejack confirmed, her heart sinking at the realization that Windy only knew her as an Element and not for who she truly was. “Don’t that beat all,” proclaimed Bow. “Oh, I’ve bet you’ve got stories to tell about my little dashie.” “A mite.” “So what brings you to Cloudsdale?” questioned Windy. That was the question Applejack had been anticipating – dreading – since before she even arrived at the front door. Such a simple question, with such a simple answer. An answer that was years in coming. A truth that, once revealed, could never again be concealed. A revelation that would change her life, and theirs, in ways nopony could ever possibly foresee. Applejack slumped slightly and her face fell. But these visible reactions were nothing compared to the swirling maelstrom inside her, a potent mix of emotions that sickened her stomach and weighed heavily on her mind. Still, Applejack fought to regain her nerve. She had come so far, endured so much, to come to this point that she refused to throw it away. “Ah’m – Ah’m here ta talk ’bout yer daughter,” she replied weakly, the best she could manage. “Is everything alright?” asked a concerned Windy. “Did something happen to Rainbow Dash?” demanded Bow. Applejack shook her head. “Rainbow Dash is fine.” Both parents let out a collective sigh of relief. “Ah’m actually here to talk about your other daughter.” Both ponies exchanged confused looks between themselves. “We only have one daughter,” stated Windy, a slight nervousness underlining her voice. Applejack gave them a hard glare. “No, ya don’t,” she said flatly. They continued returning bewildered expressions until a dawning realization turned their confusion to horror. Windy put her hooves to her face. “You know? Does that mean – oh Celestia!” Bow rose from the couch and examined Applejack. “Are you....?” “Eeyup.” Bow fell back onto the couch next to Windy. Both ponies sat in shock, staring at a ghost from their past. A tense silence settled over the room as the three ponies engaged in a long, awkward staring contest. At last Windy spoke, her voice cracking. “How... how did...?” “How did Ah find out?” “Yes,” she whispered, looking away. “Granny Smith on her deathbed told me Ah was adopted. Turns out Princess Twilight Sparkle is real good at research. She was able to determine you were mah parents.” Upon hearing Applejack’s words, Windy gasped and silence returned to the room. Finally, Applejack said, “Ah came – Ah came ta find out why –” She turned and wiped her wet eyes, refusing to let them see her cry. “Why we gave you up?” finished Bow. “Yeah.” The two pegasi looked at each other, apparently aware this day might come yet never fully prepared to face it. “It started... well, it started in high school. Your – ” the stallion forced the words “– mother and I were high school sweethearts.” “Love at first sight,” added Windy softly. “Inseperable. During our senior year, that’s when we discovered....” “Ya were preganant with me?” supplied Applejack. Windy nodded, tears starting to stream down her face. “We were scared and didn’t know what to do. We were unwed teenage parents. We – the two of us kept it secret until we could figure out what to do.” “Y’all’s parents didn’t even know?” “No,” confirmed Bow. “Nopony but the two of us.” “My parents were out of town and I was alone when I went into labor. You were the most precious thing I’d ever held.” Windy began openly weeping, and Bow wrapped a foreleg around his wife. “Imagine our surprise when we discovered that you were an earth pony.” “It’s my fault,” admitted Bow. “My grandmother was an earth pony from Manehattan.” “Your fault? Ya think being an earth pony is a bad thing?” spat Applejack. “Cloudsdale, it’s just – it’s just no place for an earth pony.” “So ya just decided ta give me away?” asked an incredulous Applejack. “We were scared Applejack. Two scared teenagers,” wailed Windy through her tears. “So why Ponyville?” Bow explained, “Cloudsdale was floating nearby at the time, and the town was founded by earth ponies, so we –” “Knew it wouldn’t raise too many questions?” “Yes,” confirmed Windy. “And the Apples?” “We didn’t want to risk going into town,” continued Bow. “So ya dropped me off at the first house ya could find?” Windy shook her head. “We watched them with their young foal, so we knew they were a loving family.” A tense silence followed. “Why –” Applejack choked. “Why didja never visit?” “We considered it,” said Bow. “But us suddenly popping up out of nowhere would have done more harm than good.” “For me... or you?” Windy protested, “We loved you Applejack. Giving you up was the hardest –” “If ya really loved me, ya wouldn’t have abandonned me in the first place.” Everypony remained quiet for a long time as her words hung like death over the room. Finally, Windy said, “Perhaps we could start over? Be the parents you deserve?” Applejack rose from her chair. “Mah parents are buried back on the farm.” She walked to the front door and opened it. “Are you going to tell her?” asked Bow. Applejack stopped in her tracks and sighed. “I’ve always loved Rainbow Dash as a sister. That’ll never change. It doesn’t really matter ta me one way or the other. Y’all created this mess, so Ah’m leavin’ it up ta y’all.” She paused. There was so much to say, so many things she wanted to know. But the words wouldn’t come. She shook her head, leaving the house and slamming the front door behind her. Two pegasi remained in the living room, holding each other in painful silence. The End