I Am

by Waxworks

First published

In a Canterlot overflowing with technology, Gear Grinder is working to get by at the inner-mountain power station. He's sent out on an errand to Ponyville, the 'City of Pleasure' with a co-worker, where they meet somepony very unusual.

City life has become difficult for anypony who is not a unicorn, and for the earth pony Gear Grinder, working day-to-day has become a routine that is enough to keep him in enough money to live the way he wants and spend time with his online friends.
After being sent down the the sprawling metropolis of Ponyville with his co-worker Amperage, Gear gets invited by his new friend to come hang out at his place.
Upon arriving, he finds out that a unicorn mare they bumped into down below in Ponyville has become Amperage's new flame, and Amperage is acting strange. What Gear knew about him from work and their brief time as friends is called into question, and he makes it his goal to investigate, and as he does, things continue to get stranger and stranger.

Canterlot and Ponyville

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Canterlot: The Shining City.

Built on the side of Horn mountain in the middle of Equestria, anypony could see for miles if they looked out off the side. Some ponies say you can see all the way to Vanhoover if your eyes are good enough, or the Crystal Empire if you look north, or Manehatten if you look east. That changes from pony to pony, but the one city you can always see is Ponyville. Now known as the City of Pleasure.

Canterlot stood high above Ponyville, covering the outside and inside of Horn mountain, leaving barely a square inch of it bare. As technology and magic grew, it became possible to burrow inside the rock or transform it for pony usage. A massive furnace fills the inside, providing heat and light for those inside, and providing power to the entire grid of Canterlot.

Skyscrapers and commercial buildings jut out from the sides, where ponies work, play, live, and die. Computers, screens, and electronics cover nearly every surface, and an increasingly in-depth network keeps ponies on all sides of Equestria connected. A pony from Appleloosa down south can keep in contact with a friend in the Crystal Empire instantly, chatting back and forth as though they were next to each other.

The home of the two sisters had been moved to the very peak of Horn mountain, with the castle now occupied by the embodiment of chaos; Discord. He’d transformed it into a massive entertainment plaza, and spent his days entertaining anypony who could pay. The sisters themselves lived inside a tower on the peak. They, and a few pegasi and some unicorns were the only ones who could survive that altitude without help. It afforded them isolation in their immortal lives; something nopony who thought about it could blame them for. They oversaw the rising of the sun and moon as usual, but very rarely appeared in public.

It was probably for the best, as the city had grown far beyond the ability of a single monarch to rule over. Ponies were elected every few years and given jurisdiction over different sections of the massive city. One was in charge of the upper half of Canterlot, the second the lower half, and the third the interior of Horn mountain. They in turn had to delegate manufacture, justice, and all else required to run a city. Far too much for the two sisters to manage alone. They were still the rulers, and they could come down from on high whenever they wanted and have everypony obey them, but they never did.


Gear Grinder glared up at the aloof grey spires of the Sister's castle far above his home in Canterlot. The castle far above looked out of place as it was, framed by neon lights and advertisements for the latest horn and wing-growth pill. He flipped his visor down and the HUD popped up, telling him he was now four minutes late for his meeting at the subway station. He grunted and flicked his ears to control his computer. The cursor on the screen slid about, opening his favorite chat channel. The moment it opened, he smiled as his online friends greeted him.

“Shouldn’t you be at work, Spider?” His friend Chain Gang said.

Spider Web was the name he used online in all the games, chat rooms, and anything else. His friend Chain Gang likewise wasn’t named Chain Gang, but that’s what everypony called him. Gear Grinder didn’t know his real name. He didn’t know anypony’s real name on here and he liked it that way. Who you were in real life didn't matter.

Gear’s eyes flicked back and forth as he typed out his response. “I’ve been sent down to Ponyville today to fetch some materials. They expect it to take all day, so I don’t have to be anywhere immediately. My companion is gonna be upset, though.”

“Aw, damn! Ponyville? I’ve heard about that place. Is it true they cater to every fetish imaginable?” Another pony typed out. This fellow’s name was Ball Buster. He talked like somepony who hadn’t been very far from home in his life. Gear had always guessed the guy lived on the southern half of Equestria. Someplace like Appleloosa, which was still far behind in tech and news.

Gear chuckled quietly as he stepped out of his apartment. He swiped his keycard to lock the door and headed down the hall toward the elevator. He passed by several ponies lying about the hallway in various intoxicated states. He didn’t live in a very upscale part of Canterlot, so it was honestly a bit of a drug-house. Reason being was that there was an unspoken agreement that unicorns lived higher up the mountain, and earth ponies and pegasi lived lower.

Technology had worked to bridge that divide, but while technology allowed earth ponies and pegasi to gain some hoof-hold in being equal to the sheer power that some unicorns could wield, unicorns had worked to keep themselves ahead, combining magic and technology to create even stranger and unusual things only they could use.

Things like teleportation chambers that held a charge and used the unicorn’s own magic to function. The pony didn’t even need to know the spell, they just needed to allow the capsule to charge off your own horn, and then *poof!* there you were at your desired destination. An earth pony or a pegasus could use it if they were accompanied by a unicorn, but not otherwise. They still had to rely on public transportation like the subway or the sky-tram, or in the case of pegasi; their own wings.

Earth ponies got the worst of it, being unable to fly or use magic. Their strength was a boon, but more often than not, it was just an excuse for unicorns to pay them to do grunt work they didn’t want to do themselves.

Gears eyes typed out his response in the visor. “Yes, Balls.” (Everypony in the chat just called him Balls). “But there’s a price for everything, and it’s not always a price you should be willing to pay.”

Gear Grinder walked past an earth pony who was holding a smoking stick of some drug in his hoof. Well… it wasn’t a hoof, it was a prosthetic, but he only had one instead of the usual two. It looked like a horrifying metal claw-thing that had been attached to his leg in place of his hoof.

It wasn’t an unusual thing to see in the poorer areas. To help bridge the gap, some earth ponies and pegasi had relied on physical augments. For Gear Grinder, they were horrifying to look at. They weren’t a hoof, and having some spider-like appendage at the end of your leg was… unsettling for him.

When used, they worked like a griffin’s claw. It gave him digits to use so he could perform fine manipulation tasks that couldn’t be done with just a mouth. It gave him the opportunity to find employment outside of the typical drudge-work like moving, lifting, pushing, pulling, and trotting that most earth ponies in the city performed. This pony looked to have only been able to afford one augment, and was not doing so well for himself. He could probably still find work that was higher-paying than most earth ponies got, but not while he was addicted to some drug.

Pegasi were better off since they could manipulate the weather, but technology and magic still one-upped them there. Unicorns could manipulate the weather as well given enough magic, and they could walk on clouds if they knew the right spell, so with the advent of all this techmancy as the unicorns called it, pegasi were fighting them for jobs, and education and skill were the deciding factors. Competition was fierce, and had frequently resulted in murder or death.

Gear Grinder stepped out of the elevator and straight into the choked streets of Lower Canterlot. There was no lobby to his apartment, as it was just one of the vertical monoliths that covered the place. Ponies were everywhere here, and they all wanted a piece of the big Canterlot pie.

The smell of food and pollution wafted into his nose and he stopped to buy a kebab of falafel from his favourite food cart with a name he’d never been able to read. He just called it ‘Curry’s’ after the earth pony owner. The food was greasy, but it always smelled good and hadn’t killed him yet. From behind the counter, Curry nodded to Gear, and Gear nodded back.

They’d met many a time as Gear passed by on his way to work and bought a quick bite to eat. Curry had an exotic look to him, and Gear suspected he was probably from Saddle Arabia. Despite having met many times, and even having a few chats, the topic had never come up. Gear suspected he had come overseas hoping to make it big in Canterlot where all the ponies gathered, then Curry got here and discovered it wasn’t that easy if you weren’t a unicorn graduated from Celestia’s school. Having discovered that, he had just resorted to selling his ‘exotic’ foods to ponies who were interested or wanted a taste of home.

He made a decent living, judging by the decorations and defenses for his shop he’d set up, but it probably wasn’t everything he imagined it was going to be. Gear figured that it was a lot of hard work with very little reward. Gear had managed to get a job in the Horn Mountain Power Station.

Gear Grinder walked down the sidewalk of the narrow switchback road leading down from the apartments to the commercial district. For the area Gear lived, it was mostly alcohol, clothes, and a single inordinately expensive food mart. Hence why Gear usually bought food from Curry. He shopped elsewhere when he could.

Like today. He’d worn his largest set of saddle bags so that he could buy some things from Ponyville while he was down there. If he still had bits or room left over when he was done, he was going to stop by one of the supermarkets on his way back through Canterlot.

Right now, though, he needed to hurry. His visor told him he was now fifteen minutes late for his meeting. He broke into a trot, weaving in and out of the crowd as he wound his way down into the mountain to the subway station.

“Hey guys, going into the mountain. If I lose connection, you know what happened. I’ll be back online when the subway’s out,” Gear typed to the chat.

“No worries, Spider. There’s not much going on in here other than me kicking Balls’ flank at Equestrian Warriors,” Chain Gang said.

“Constantly spamming Dragon’s fireball attack is bullshit and you know it,” Ball Buster retorted.

“I can beat you with Steely Gaze if you’re gonna bitch about it,” Chain Gang said.

“Try it, then! Nopony can get through Thunderfury’s lightning wall without a projectile attack!” Ball Buster boasted.

“Gonna make you eat those words, Balls,”

The typing stopped as the two focused their attention on the game. It was a fighting game they frequently played together. Chain Gang was the best at it, but Spider, as Gear called himself online, was getting better. Living in such squalor as he did, his online gaming was the sole escape he had from the bleak existence he was living.

His job was hard, but it paid well, and if he continued living such a stark life outside of work, enjoying nothing but his online entertainment, he would eventually be able to afford an apartment in a better part of town. That was the goal, anyway.

He didn’t know if it would ever happen, but he was going to keep working, and he was going to keep trying. Things were steady for now. He had a good job, he had acceptable living conditions and there was a solid lock on his door. He had his goggles for the net, and they were probably the most expensive thing he owned, including his apartment’s rent. He didn’t have to look at the place he lived. He could just go to work, do what was needed, and come home.

Gear Grinder sighed as his goggles lost connection inside the tunnel and tilted them up onto his forehead. The train had to make its way down the interior of Horn mountain before it would exit into Ponyville. Wireless didn’t work in here unless you had one of those magic-powered antennae, but those were expensive. He couldn’t get one right now.

He waited on the platform until the train came along, and climbed on amidst dozens of other ponies. He couldn’t find a seat at this hour, so he stood, swaying in the aisle as the train hovered its way down the track through Inner Canterlot. He’d arrive at Ponyville Station soon, and then work would begin.

Pony'ville' No Longer

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Amperage waited at Pony-Can station impatiently. He understood that earth ponies had to walk everywhere, but Gear Grinder was half an hour late! Traffic couldn’t have possibly been that bad, and the trains were impeccable. There was no announcement that they’d been delayed for any reason. No pony had thrown themselves in front of one yet, so what was taking him?

He looked around at the motley crew occupying the station. They were made up of lizards, fish, buffalo, minotaurs, and many others. A sign of living in Ponyville. The name still stuck all these years later, but it was decidedly not a village any longer.

It had grown quickly some years after the princess of friendship ascended. The creation of her castle had drawn ponies in at first, as they wanted to take advantage of the proximity to a new seat of power. Soon after the ponies came in, other creatures wanted to move in. Zebras, goats, donkeys, minotaurs. They had been welcomed by the princess, but hearing about how welcoming she had been had drawn other creatures from the south. Creatures without hooves.

They say Ponyville used to be more about friendship, and ostensibly that’s still true, but Ponyville sought to welcome literally everypony that came. Griffins, minotaurs, arimaspi, buffalos, yaks. Everypony who went to Ponyville was welcomed, and it wasn’t long before it contained the widest range of cultures in all of Equestria. That meant that every culture wanted to have the comforts of home, and in an effort to be more welcoming, the princess of friendship helped them make it happen. Now it was a sprawling metropolis covering much of the lower countryside around Horn mountain, but it’s not quite as welcoming as it used to be.Everypony is still welcome, but it’s not as safe as a pony would want.

Ponies, being smaller than many of the other creatures in and especially outside Equestria, are easy targets for bigger creatures like minotaurs or the fish-folk from the south. Pegasi can fly, but griffins are bigger and more vicious, and if you aren’t a powerful unicorn, your magic isn’t quite enough to protect you from anypony wishing to do you ill. The princess tried to quell such habits early on, because friendship is about not taking advantage of your fellow creatures, but as it grew it became impossible for her to police everything. She and the other elements of harmony tried, but it grew too big too quickly.

A police force was created, of course, and they were everywhere, but then the princess of friendship found out she couldn’t police the police, and corruption became the name of the game. Bribery, abuse of power, you name it, it began happening. Now Ponyville was known as the City of Pleasure. Anything you wanted, you could get if you knew the right pony.

“Or creature, as the case may be,” Amperage muttered to himself. He ruffled his wings impatiently, then sighed gratefully as the train pulled up.

He raised a wing and flipped his visor down. The HUD popped up and he hunted the crowd disembarking for the ID of Gear’s visor. A targeting reticle appeared and scanned the crowd, then zoomed in on a pony pushing through the crowd, labeling him as ‘Spider Web’, Gear’s online name. Amperage flapped his wings and floated above the crowd, flying over to Gear. He floated above him and clapped his hooves.

“Gear! You’re bloody late!” Amperage yelled above the crowd.

Gear looked up, then stumbled as ponies behind him pushed him onward. He didn’t respond, but pointed further ahead to an empty section of the train platform. Amperage flew over to it and waited as Gear shoved through the crowd.

“I know I’m late. You can clearly see why.” Gear gestured to the packed platform.

“It shouldn’t have taken you quite this long to get here. We’re forty-five minutes behind schedule.” Amperage pointed to his visor, which displayed the time on the front for Gear to see.

“Well, whatever. Are you ready to go? I got my saddlebags. That’s why I’m here, right? To carry stuff? I just hope it isn’t too much. I wanted to buy some groceries from Ponyville,” Gear said.

“That is why you’re here, yes. I can’t fly while carrying everything, that’s why I volunteered you. I figured you could get out of your apartment and the station once in a while, eh?” Amperage punched Gear in the shoulder with a smile.

Amperage had worked with Gear Grinder for a while, and he’d noticed that the other stallion rarely left his home. Amperage was a bit of a social butterfly himself, so when there were work parties, vacations, nights out, and anything like that, Gear Grinder was conspicuously absent. So, in an effort to give the poor stallion some much-needed socializing, he’d go out of his way to make opportunities for the other pony to get out and see the city.

“Ugh,” Gear Grinder groaned. “Should have known it wasn’t just chance that we ended up together.”

“Aw, you say that like it’s a punishment to work with me.” Amperage smiled wide.

“It’s not on the top of my list of fun things to do.”

“Hey, c’mon. I did this as a favor for you. I don’t expect anything in return, but surely you can enjoy getting out of the power plant?”

Gear sighed and flipped his goggles down over his eyes now that he had connection again. “Yeah, I do. Sorry. Don’t mean to sound ungrateful.”

“Nah, dude. I get it. I do.” Amperage bumped into Gear’s side and grinned. “Getting out and about isn’t your thing. But this is work. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me if you want to get paid! Could be worse, right?”

“Yeah, it could be worse. Thanks, Amp.”

“Excellent! Now, this is a fully reimbursed trip down to Ponyville. Travel and food are all paid for, but luxury items are not. Keep your receipts, and let’s pick up some fun stuff, eh? And remember…”

“No separating from your partner. I know. I’ve been sent down before.”

“There ya go! But we’re covered for the whole day, so let’s make the most of it, yeah?” Amperage fluttered his wings in excitement. “Anything in particular you wanted to see?”

Gear Grinder thought about it for a moment. “Well, besides some of the cheaper and exotic foods they have down here, I wanted to find that electronics store. Do you know the one I mean? What was the name…”

Amperage’s face lit up. “Eternal lights! Yeah, I know the one! You can see it glowing at night. The place is lit up like a Hearthswarming tree.”

“You’ve never been?”

“Never wanted to. I use the net for information and the occasional bit of Dirtville on Muzzlebook. Most ponies talk about Eternal Lights as ‘the’ gaming store in Ponyville, but gaming isn’t my thing.”

“That makes sense. I haven’t been because it’s expensive. You can see the prices online and they’re out of reach, but I wanted to see if they had a techmantic antenna I could buy. That way I can use my goggles inside Mount Horn.”

“Ohhhh, that’d be cool. Maybe I’ll get one too. Then I could check Muzzlebook while at work!”

“That’s part of the reason I want one so much. In Canterlot you have to go to the upper levels to find stores that sell them, and they always charge more to earth ponies. I stopped going up there when I found that out.”

“Ah, yeah. Shit sucks.” Amperage’s ears flicked as he clicked about his own visor. The sensors attached to his ears picked up the motions and Gear could see the cursor moving about his HUD. “Alright then. You want to pick up the supplies before or after our shopping spree?”

“That depends on what you want to do, if anything. I just want to shop for food and the techmantic antenna. Depending on distance, that should be done in a couple hours.”

“I don’t need anything. I can fly down here whenever I want, remember?” Amperage flapped his wings for emphasis.

“Right. Rub it in, why don’t you?”

“Hahaha!” Amperage put a hoof over Gear’s withers “Not trying to rub anything in, dude. Just making a point. Maybe I’ll help you with groceries sometime, eh? As payment, maybe we can hang out?”

Gear looked at Amperage in confusion. “And do what?”

“Hey, I dunno, maybe play some of those games you like so much?”

“…I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I can ask for!” Amperage flicked his ears some more. “So, groceries?”

“Yeah, let me pull up the directions.”

Gear’s ears flicked about and his eyes darted to and fro inside his goggles. He clicked through several maps until he found one he liked, and with a flick of an ear, he sent it over to Amperage, who looked it over.

“Ahhh, yeah. I know these landmarks. Doing it by hoof will be very different, but I think I can find the way. Come on, Gear!” Amperage made sure Gear Grinder was following him and led the way off the station platform and into Ponyville.

The station they were at was at the base of Horn mountain, and was the only train connection between Ponyville and Canterlot. Being in such a position, it saw a lot of traffic, and the train was huge to match the need for business. The morning and evening rush saw ponies leaving Canterlot and going to Ponyville to work, then it saw those same ponies at the end of the day leaving Ponyville and heading back up to the safety of Canterlot. It was mostly earth ponies, of course. Unicorns and pegasi either didn’t need to leave Canterlot in the case of the unicorns, or could just fly down in the case of the pegasi.

During the rest of the day, it saw the occasional use by non-pony folk. The rest of the creatures who weren’t welcome in Canterlot still had business to do there. Many of them employed ponies who could get about the city with ease and safety, and likewise ponies would call on the creatures from below to help them do business in Ponyville. It was a neat and tidy symbiotic relationship.

In Gear Grinder and Amperage’s case, the power station just didn’t want to be seen employing such creatures, and sent a duo of ponies down to Ponyville to fetch supplies they needed that they could get for much less than by dealing with the unicorns above. All it took was sending a couple ponies deep into the lion’s den.

Amperage looked about the streets as the two of them walked, and saw why it was considered so dangerous. The two of them were dwarfed by nearly every creature around them. All manner of beasts, reptilian, mammalian, and avian were everywhere, and all of them stood taller than the two ponies.

“You’ve been down here before, right?” Gear Grinder asked.

“Yeah…” Amperage was distracted, trying to pick between two roads.

“How come they don’t send a unicorn in the team?” Gear asked. “I feel… exposed. I’m not even the strongest earth pony at the power station. What am I supposed to do if we get attacked?”

“Get captured, but don’t get captured with the supplies.”

“That’s not very funny.”

“It’s not supposed to be. They really don’t care what happens to you.”

“It feels that way.”

“Well, let me put it this way: Do you have family in Canterlot?”

“No. They all live in Vanhoover or Baltimare.”

“No foals or special somepony?”

“No.”

“They you’re incredibly disposable.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Sorry, dude. S’just how work sees it.”

“Well at least I’m out of the power station!” Gear forced a smile.

Amperage clapped him on the back. “That’s the spirit! Now let me concentrate on where we’re going. I might need to fly up and get a pegasi-view of the streets.”

“What? Don’t leave me down here alone!”

“It’s just for a second. I need to get my bearings. Now don’t move.” Amperage spread his wings and leaped into the air. He flew up in tight circles to ensure he didn’t move far from his take-off point, and kept the reticle in his HUD trained on Gear.

He spun about in the air, trying to find the buildings that matched the pegasi-view of the city. The path it was asking them to take to the nearest pony-friendly grocery was through some questionable streets, but he was trying to find some that were going to end up near Eternal Lights. That way they’d be able to hit two pegasi with one rock.

Amperage double-checked the path one more time, then nodded to himself and swooped back down to rejoin Gear Grinder. He found the poor earth pony waylaid by a smaller cat-creature who had his large coat open to show off unicorn horns. Gear was not amused.

“Okay, first off, that is disgusting. Second, that’s not even how a unicorn horn works. You can’t just glue it on your forehead and have it work. Now get the hell away from me before I call the police for trafficking body parts,” Gear Grinder said, shooing the cat away with a hoof.

Upon seeing Amperage landing nearby, the cat creature closed his jacket and scuttled off.

“Making friends already, eh?” Amperage trotted over.

“It is the City of Friendship.”

“City of Pleasure to anypony who really knows it.”

“I hear it’s not as bad as all this near the Castle. The princess really keeps things under control over there. Regimenting most things with a bit of an iron hoof.”

“Where’d you hear that?”

“The net.”

“Ah.”

“Well, you got the path?”

“Yeah. Follow me.”

The two turned down a street lined with small shops and smaller homes on either side. Children of all ages and sizes played in the streets, and some probably weren’t playing at all but just wanted you to believe they were. Amperage kept a hoof on his bits and kept most creatures away with his wings. Gear Grinder wasn’t worried about his saddlebags because he had nothing in them yet, but he kept his bit-pouch around his neck and a sidelong eye on anypony around him. Otherwise he stayed tight on Amperage’s tail.

“I think we’re almost there,” Amperage said.

“Good.” Gear responded.

Amperage looked behind himself at Gear, and noticed the pony’s eyes weren’t fully on the path ahead of him. It looked like he was reading or writing something in his goggles. It was about what Amperage had come to expect about the stallion.

He didn’t bug him about it. He led the way, making sure Gear was following him the whole time, and waved a happy hoof at the store when they had arrived. “Here we are, Gear. One of the few shops that sells only pony-friendly food! Fruits, vegetables, and grains abound! Without a single carcass in sight!”

The store had a friendly and colorful sign out front, and was much smaller in size than its neighbors. Compared to the other streets they had traveled down, there was a significantly larger population of ponies around the store. Earth ponies and pegasi were coming and going. Usually in pairs, but there was the occasional lone pony. Not a single unicorn, though.

“Oh, I didn’t need it to be strictly pony-friendly. I’m not squeamish about meat, but thank you, Amp.”

“Anything to make my new bud’s trip down to Ponyville that much more pleasant,” Amperage said. “In addition, it’s not that far from Eternal Lights, either, so I had an ulterior motive for picking this.”

Gear visibly brightened at mention of the electronics store. “Oh! That’s fantastic! I’ll hurry and get groceries. Then we can head over there!”

“I’ll wait out here,” Amperage said with a smile. He took up a position outside the front of the store while Gear Grinder went inside.

Amperage waited patiently for his friend. He pony-watched while idling outside the store. Pegasi flew down from above, one of which he recognized. He nodded hello and got a nod back, but he didn’t know them well enough to strike up conversation. But then he noticed a pony across the street watching him.

It was a lone pony. A unicorn mare, of all things, but that wasn’t the only thing that made her stand out. Her clothes looked hoof-woven, with obvious and poor stitching, and she was wearing a lot of them, as well as a large straw hat. She also appeared to have no headset, goggles, or other augments that were visible. It made her look out of place among the myriad electronics, cables, and concrete surrounding them. Either she’d done a damn good job hiding them in her clothes and hat, or she had none. Amperage wasn’t sure which was stranger.

It began to unnerve him. She was just standing there, watching him appraise her and her clothes. She didn’t waver in her gaze, and Amperage couldn’t bring himself to stare back. He glanced at her eyes, but he found himself unable to hold her gaze. Her eyes were a bright and sunshiny yellow, and he wasn’t able to stare at her the same way she stared back at him.

He tried to pay attention to anything else, but she wasn’t leaving, and she didn’t appear to be shopping. It was like she was there just to look at him. He looked around, but there was nopony else standing in her gaze but him. Tentatively, he waved at her and gave an awkward smile. To his surprise, she waved back. He pointed at himself, and she nodded.

Just then, Gear Grinder walked back out of the store. “Alright then. Got a good amount of produce much cheaper than you can get in Canterlot. It’s criminal how little they charge down here. I’m just glad it’s not actually illegal.” Gear stopped as he noticed Amperage glancing across the small street.

“She’s been watching me for almost the whole time you’ve been in there, dude,” Amperage said. “It’s been a little weird. I even waved to her and she waved back.”

“Yeah, and? Did you talk to her?”

“Not yet. You think I should?”

“I’m actually surprised you haven’t yet. Aren’t you the one who tries to get me to go out and talk to ponies all the time?”

“Yeah, but this is different. Her stare is… kind of unnerving.”

“She’s just looking. Maybe she’s got a thing for pegasi, or your wings are just the right size, or your color sets her off in just that kind of way. I don’t know.”

“Yeah, you’re right. It’s just… those eyes. Have you looked at them?” Amperage gestured with a hoof at the mare across the way.

Gear looked over at the mare, and she glanced at him, but then looked right back at Amperage. Gear did cluck his tongue in amazement, though. “Wow. They’re intense, you’re right. But she really seems interested in only you. I really think you should go say hello, at the very least.” Gear punched Amperage in the shoulder.

“Yeah, okay. I think I will!” Amperage puffed up his chest, and ruffled his wings. “Here I go!”

“Good luck!”

Amperage crossed the street, ducking under some of the creatures going about their business, and fluttering over one of the huge electric cycles that puttered down the roads. He alighted on the road just in front of the mare and cleared his throat.

“Hello there,” the mare spoke first, throwing him off. Her voice was deep, but she spoke in a clipped manner, without wasting time.

Amperage gawped for a moment before he could speak. “Uh… hey! I saw you watching me and thought I’d come say hello.”

“I was wondering if you’d take the hint or not. You really must thank your friend there for giving you the push you needed.” She gestured across the road to Gear.

“Hahaha. He’s not quite a friend yet. I’m working on that. He doesn’t get out much, but we’re down here for work. Speaking of, I really can’t stay and chat for a long time. My name’s Amperage. Pleased to meet you.” Amperage stuck out a hoof.

She reached up and took his hoof. “I am Nom de Guerre, but you may call me Guerre. It is a pleasure indeed, Amperage.”

Amperage felt an electric charge go up his spine when she spoke his name. Hearing her say it just made him feel tingly all over. This mare was something else, and she was interested in him! He couldn’t believe his luck!

He smiled at her and sighed. “So, Guerre…” Amperage savored the sound of her name. “Since I can’t stay, is there any way I might contact you? I noticed you don’t have any tech. Are you purely techmantic?”

“Oh, not at all. I do not use any tech whatsoever. I find it distracts me from the here and now.”

“A reasonable way of looking at it. My co-worker over there spends most of his time online, but he seems happy,” Amperage said. “So, is there any way we can meet again? I’d love to get to know you better.”

“Yes, of course there is.” Guerre levitated a card out of one of the pockets of her coat. “Call this number if you wish to contact me. It is where I live. They will relay the message and I can call you back.”

Amperage took the card out of the air. It was a business card for a bakery called ‘Loafers’, with Nom de Guerre’s name written in a beautiful flowing script on the back. Amperage looked up at Guerre and grinned wide. “Sweet! Thanks very much, Guerre! I’ll contact you tonight! I promise!”

“I look forward to it, Amperage.”

Amperage felt that delightful chill go up his back again as his name spilled from her lips, and he grinned even harder. He waved goodbye to Guerre and flew back across the road, doing a happy spin before landing next to Gear.

“Went well, then?” Gear asked.

“Dude, it went awesome! She’s totally into me, and I got her number!” Amperage excitedly shook the business card under Gear’s nose.

“Nice! What’s her name?”

Amperage grinned. “Nom de Guerre.”

“Nom de Gwhere? Isn’t that Prench?”

Amperage shrugged. “Hey, I dunno, but that’s what she said her name was.” He suddenly looked worried. “You don’t think she gave me a fake name and number did she?” Amperage looked back across the street, but the mare was gone. Only the creatures hurrying up and down the street remained.

“No, no. Not at all. I just said I thought it was Prench. I don’t actually know Prench,” Gear said. “Anyway, let’s get to Eternal Lights. We’re still on a schedule you know.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” Amperage looked at where Nom de Guerre had been standing one last time, tucked the business card into his shirt, and gave a happy little hop, fluttering his wings. “This way, this way!”

A Day's Work Done

View Online

They had limited time for shopping, but Gear Grinder was intent on making the most of it. Despite Amperage’s insistence that he could call and ask for help getting down to Ponyville anytime, he still didn’t feel comfortable around all these huge creatures that seemed to dominate the city. He was sure their presence was good for business and trade, and the economical benefits of having such a diverse population were surely impressive, but it didn’t make a pony feel very safe. Especially when pony body parts were such hot commodities for so many of them.

That said, Eternal Lights was almost enough to make him want to come back. The place was both an electronic shop and an arcade built into a what was probably once an office building. It filled ten stories, with only the first two selling tech. The other eight were dedicated to arcade machines, and it was glorious.

The latest machine for Equestrian Warriors was there, and there was the Luna-vision pod machine for Changeling’s Adventure. Gear had never had the opportunity to play that before. It was supposed to make you feel like you were actually a completely new pony. They said it only used tech, but Gear was certain some techmancy went into it, because you only found it on the upper levels of Canterlot.

Sadly, despite Gear wanting to spend time playing the games, they couldn’t stay. They had his antenna, so he bought one, and Amperage got one too, then they were on their way, with Gear giving the store one last sad look as they left.

“Hey, dude. Don’t look so glum. You got your antenna, and remember my offer: We can come down any time you like. Within reason, of course,” Amperage hastily amended. “I’m not bringing you down here every second day just to play Equestrian Warriors.”

“Well gee, now you’ve gone and lied to me,” Gear said sarcastically. “That’s not really anytime then, is it?”

“You got me. I’m a filthy liar. I only tell fibs.”

“Damn right.”

Amperage chuckles, then his ears flick as he pulls up the map on his HUD. “Let me just find out where we’re going for work. I’ll be right back down after I’ve gotten my bearings, then we’ll be on our way back home.”

“I’ll wait here.”

“Okay. Shouldn’t be too far away. Just a few streets. It might even end up being closer to the station if this is correct. Be right back!” Amperage leaped into the air and flew upward in lazy circles. He’d made it halfway up Eternal Lights’ façade when there was a loud *SQUAAAAWK!* and a griffin crashed into him!

“Amp!” Gear yelled in alarm.

The griffin clawed at him, screeching and howling, and Amperage was just trying to hold him off, wings flapping wildly. Feathers filled the air as the two lashed out at each other while Gear was helpless to only watch from the ground.

After several more seconds of fighting, the griffin ripped Amperage’s saddlebags off him, and dove out of sight, leaving Amperage dazed and confused. Holding his head, he floated down to Gear, who rushed up to him.

“Are you okay?” Gear asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little bit scratched up. He got my saddlebags and that was all,” Amperage said, dabbing at his face with a hoof. He looked up at Gear Grinder. “How’s my face look?”

Gear gave him a once-over and smiled what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “Not too bad. A lot of scratches, but I don’t think anything will need stitches. What did you have in your bags?”

“Just the rest of my bits and a set of shoes. Thanks for carrying my antenna, by the way. That was lucky.”

“That’s literally why I’m here. To carry your stuff.”

“Heh, yeah.”

“Also; why do you have a set of shoes in your bag?”

“Just in case.”

“Just in case what?”

Amperage just shrugged. He blinked as a drop of blood dripped past his eye. “I never found out.”

“Luna’s ass, dude. You look like you lost a fight with a cat.”

“I literally just did.”

“Heh. You’re right. Let’s get you patched up. Eternal Lights should have a first-aid kit.” Gear pulled his friend back inside the arcade.



The two stallions got Amperage some bandages, then finished their errand for work. They parted ways at the Pony-Can station, with only a little arguing.

“Are you sure you can fly home alright? Your eye looks swollen.”

“Yeah. It’s nothing I haven’t flown with before. I know a doc in Cloudsdale who can take a look at it. He specializes in griffin-caused injuries.”

“There’s a specialty for that?”

“In today’s Ponyville, there’s a specialty for most things.”

“Understandable,” Gear said. “I’ll drop the supplies off, then contact you online when I’m home safe. Good luck, Amp. And, sorry about your saddlebag.”



“Hah, no worries. This was work-related, so I get fully reimbursed. I’ll need to submit an on-the-job injury report, but I’ll catch you online later!” He waved a hoof, then took off into the sky, leaving Gear waiting for the train.

Gear didn’t have long to wait. Soon after Amperage flew away, the great steel beast hove into the station. It’s neon trim giving it a ghostly pallor in the dim evening light. Gear Grinder stepped through the doors into the train, found himself a seat and flipped down his goggles to check with his friends before the train got inside the mountain.

Gear could see that Balls had left for the night, but Chain Gang was still there. “Hey, guys. Day’s just about over. Just gotta drop some stuff off at work.”

There were a bunch of scattered hellos, and the occasional ‘good work’ here and there. Chain Gang didn’t respond immediately, but a pony by the name of Laugh Track popped in with his usual flair.

“Runnin’ outta supplies at the power station makes it sound like they should… ‘charge’ more for their services, huh? ;D” Laugh Track said.

Most of the chat groaned and emoted themselves throwing fruit, which just made Laugh Track smile harder.

“:DDDDDD”

Gear left it alone and didn’t say anything. He was just waiting for the action to die down a little before he threw a huge damper on the mood. The back and forth continued, with Laugh Track continuing the barrage of puns until one of the mods kicked him from the room. He hopped back in immediately.

“Removed from the room after only five puns. Was that a record?”

“No, the fewest pun record was with three,” one of the moderators of the chat room said. He went by the name of Large Hat.

“Are you sure?” Laugh Track said.

“I’m positive.”

“:D”

It took him a minute, but eventually Large Hat understood. “Luna’s ass,” he said, then removed himself from the room, only to jump right back in.

Gear chuckled, which got him some strange looks from some of the ponies around him on the train. They all turned away and paid him no more mind when they figured out he was on his goggles. It was a pretty commonplace sight, it was just the noise. Most ponies still tried to avoid laughing out loud.

“So, my day was an adventure. My pegasus co-worker got mugged while we were down in Ponyville. Lost his saddlebags and got his face all scratched up by a griffin,” Gear said in the chat.

“Woah, no shit?” Laugh Track said.

“No shit. He was flying up to check our location and a griffin just swooped out of nowhere and attacked him. It was probably like, twice his size.”

“Wow. That’s really something else. Was this your first time down in Ponyville, Spider?” Large Hat asked.

“Mine, yes. I was only sent at my co-worker’s request, and because I’m an earth pony. I literally only went to carry things. That, and work requires two ponies to go down to Ponyville together. Safety reasons.”

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Large Hat said.

“Oh, hey Spider! That sounds like quite the adventure. Were your co-worker’s injuries bad?” Chain Gang had started paying attention to his goggles again.

“No, he said they were mostly superficial, but they were all scratches to his face. It looked really nasty, though. Blood was dripping into his eyes and everything. He didn’t even really seem fazed, like this was normal.”

“Wow. Your co-worker sounds like a badass,” Chain Gang said.

“He’s okay. We never really talked much, but he really wanted to hang out, be it online or off, so if he and I end up playing games I’ll probably invite him to the chat.”

“Is he good at games?” Laugh Track asked.

“I have no idea. I barely know the guy. He’s probably better at Equestrian Warriors than Balls, though. Everypony is.”

“Awwww, poor guy isn’t even here to defend himself,” Chain Gang said. “I’ll tell you that he’s really working on Thunderfury’s defensive game. He almost kept me away with that lightning wall …almost.”

“Well, that’s neither here nor there until I talk to him tomorrow.” Gear Grinder rummaged in his bag for his new antenna. The train was coming up on the mountain, and now was the perfect time to test it. He found it nestled in a safe corner of a pocket next the miscellaneous parts that dominated his saddlebags. He also found Amperage’s antenna. He’d forgotten to give it to him before he left.

Gear rubbed a hoof over his face. Amperage had probably done this on purpose. Asking him to hold it, then forgetting it on purpose just so that he’d have an excuse to call on him again. It was a very clever ploy.

Gear’s eyes turned back to his HUD. “Ugh. In all the excitement, I ended up taking my co-worker’s new techmantic antenna. Now I’m going to have to contact him and give it back to him. I think he did it on purpose.”

“Oh! I’ve heard of those! They’re expensive as fuck. Where’d you get it?” Laugh Track asked.

“Eternal Lights, down in Ponyville. I was saving up anyway, so I thought I’d see if they had one. Half the price of the ones in Upper Canterlot.”

“Daaaaaayum. That really boosts my signal. :D I’ll have to go sometime.”

“Ahhh, Upper Canterlot. Why you gotta hate me because I don’t have a penis in the middle of my forehead?”

“Hey, not everypony up here is an asshole,” Large Hat said.

“You’re a bit of an asshole,” Laugh Track retorted.

“What, really?” Large Hat said.

Everypony in the chat gave an “Ehhhh” or a “Hmmm”.

“Seriously? Am I that bad?”

“We’re just pullin’ your leg, Hat. Don’t worry so much,” Gear said. “You’re the least stuck-up unicorn I know.”

“Other than your boss, aren’t I the only unicorn you know?”

“Yes.”

“Great. Really means a lot, :/” Large Hat typed out.

“You’re fine. Don’t get your socks bunched up. But you’ll have to forgive me while I set up my new antenna. Entering the mountains now.”

“Good luck, Spider,” Chain Gang said.

“Good luck ‘boosting your signal’ in public ;),” Laugh Track said.

Gear took off his goggles so that he could see what he was doing with the antenna. Being a piece of techmancy, it had strange parts that he didn’t recognize, and couldn’t guess the function of. He pulled out the instructions and began reading through them, trying familiarize himself with what each section did.

The antenna wasn’t huge. It fit into a slot that was on every piece of head-tech and could be expanded or retracted so it would activate or not. It used either electricity or magic, depending on which one the pony using it had available to them, and would connect to the nearest wireless signal, riding ambient magic or ley lines, regardless if you were a unicorn or not.

Despite his familiarity with a lot of tech and other machines, Gear could not fathom how it worked. He’d been using tech and working with it all his life, but techmancy was something unique to unicorns. It made him more than a little jealous.

Gear fit the antenna into the slot on his goggles, then fastened it in with the provided latch and plug. It shouldn’t fall off no matter how hard he jostled it, and the plug ensured he could make it extend or retract with the in-tech interface. Once he was satisfied it was in, he slid the goggles back over his eyes and turned it all back on just as the train entered the mountain.

The setting sun disappeared, and the inner lights on the train clicked on as they sensed the darkness. Gear stared at the stone walls outside the train as he watched the chat log go by in front of him. They were talking about modding the game Yaket. Laugh Track was all about the more risqué mods and making flanks as big and round as possible, while Large Hat preferred mods that improved immersion and Chain Gang liked difficulty mods. Gear ignored them for now. He had no opinion on modding, nor the game Yaket.

He turned to the window and stared at the passing stone. It wouldn’t be long before the stone walls would disappear and they would enter the power station.

A marvel of unicorn, earth pony, and pegasi combined engineering; the power station collected heat energy from far below Horn Mountain. Sensors had been drilled into the ground until they struck magma and, using unicorn magic to prevent them from melting, they collected the heat energy in multitudes of heat-resistant cables devised by pegasi to collect lightning. The cables themselves were the size of the train Gear was riding in, and had been smithed to the pegasi specifications and transported and set in place by earth ponies. The whole station had been created right before the division of the races had happened, and was the last great thing they all had created working together. It had lasted hundreds of years, and was predicted to last hundreds more with proper upkeep.

Gear’s job at the power station was nothing so glamorous as those who had created it. His job was mostly fetching things for others, with the occasional bit of cleaning and heavy lifting. He had no illusions about his position though. He was disposable and he knew it. Hence why he never said no to anything; like going down to somewhere as dangerous as Ponyville.

The train roared across the suspended rails, passing over gaping holes drilled into the stone below. Remnants of the unicorn drilling project, some of the holes had gone nowhere, or they hadn’t struck magma like they thought. The huge pits inside the mountain’s core had been left behind and never filled in.

The air conditioning in the train clicked on as the ambient temperature rose. Gear could see short sections of the superheated cables, excess waves of heat shimmering off them and being dispersed into the stone nearby. The cables and their sensors came up from below and into the collection area, where the heat was converted into power in areas Gear wasn’t allowed to go. Then all that power went out to power all of Canterlot; upper, central, and lower, with excess power stored for emergencies.

The train pulled into the station, and Gear and a several other ponies got off. Co-workers, most of them. He’d seen them in passing, but like with Amperage, Gear never spoke to any of them. He didn’t know what he would say if it didn’t have to do with work, and since many of them were unicorns, he didn’t even have to work with them. He’d just deliver things to them, then leave.

Gear trotted through the station, all the way up the tunnel to the building, swiped his keycard and stepped inside the building proper. The cool air of the interior washed over him and he sighed gratefully. It wasn’t uncomfortable outside the building, but it was stifling. It felt thick, and it wasn’t pleasant, no matter how much pegasi and unicorn magic attempted to regulate it. Gear quickly ran to the quartermaster and delivered the materials. He said nothing to the quartermaster and she said nothing back. They just exchanged paperwork, then Gear left. He went straight back to the train station, out into the stifling heat, and got to wait again. He sighed, then flipped his visor down and went back to the chat.

“Turned all the supplies in at work, and now I get to go home. Full day’s pay, and all I had to do was carry some stuff. I even got to hang out at an awesome arcade during work. Good stuff,” Gear said in the chat.

“Nice work, Spider. You got your antenna working, then?” Chain Gang said.

“Yep! Works like a charm. This is going to make those dreary days walking back and forth across the station much more fun.”

“You think you’re gonna go hang out with that co-worker you mentioned?”

Gear didn’t type anything for a moment as he thought it over. “I guess I will. I have to return his antenna to him since he left it with me. I might as well make a day of it.”

“That’s the spirit! I don’t think it’ll be as bad as you imagine.”

“You’re probably right. But mentioning that, I should send him a message. I told him I’d let him know when I dropped everything off and got home.”

Gear flicked away the chat screen, relegating it to the ‘most-used’ icons on the side of his HUD, then pulled open one of the more common messengers most ponies used. Gear and his online friends avoided it because it was cluttered with ads and the like, but Gear kept it for work-related messages. His Boss was on there if anypony needed him, so Gear made sure to keep his profile as sterile as possible: No incriminating evidence there!

He flicked through the names until he found the one he was looking for: Amperage. Pegasus pony. Works at Canterlot Power Station. Not in a relationship—and with a profile pic of him making a duck face. Classy stuff, Amperage.

Gear sent him a friend request and a message. “Hey Amp. This is Gear Grinder from work. I have your antenna still and I need to deliver it to you. I guess we could—” Gear stopped, confused.

What did normal ponies even do when they hung out? Did they go drinking? Dancing? (Could two stallions go dancing without it seeming too strange?) Gear had no idea what ponies who didn’t share his interests did with their evenings. His evenings usually consisted of finishing work, coming home, and playing games with his friends online. He had no idea what Amperage might enjoy doing. But, Amperage did say he’d try to play some games.

“—hang out?” Gear finished, then hit send. He’d deal with the interpretation of it later. That was too much to deal with at the moment.

The train pulled in through the tunnel, and Gear climbed aboard. He looked for a seat but the only one available was one between an elderly pegasus mare and a tech’d out earth pony. The elderly mare wasn’t a problem, but Gear was still weirded out by body-tech. He opted to stand instead.

The older mare scooted over a little bit and motioned to the seat, but Gear shook his head. His eyes wandered involuntarily to the earth pony and whatever the augment in his chest was supposed to do. He lingered just too long, and the pony caught him staring. The earth pony looked at the mare next to him, motioning for Gear to take a seat, then he looked back at Gear and smirked.

The earth pony pulled back what little his shirt covered, and made a show of inhaling. He inhaled far longer than would have been normal for a pony, and he just kept going. Gear looked away, but he could still hear the pony loudly breathing in. The augment in his chest started making a whirring noise as it started doing something, then the breathing stopped. Gear refused to look, but that whirring noise kept going. Whatever that pony’s chest tech was supposed to do had something to do with breathing regulation, and Gear found that creepy.

Gear waited, but no exhalation was forthcoming. He kept his eyes firmly locked on the passing buildings, interspersed with tunnels through both rock and buildings as the subway sped on its way through lower Canterlot. His stop was coming up soon, and he just wanted off the train and away from that unnatural behavior.

“Guys, there’s this pony on the subway with some sort of lung augment. It covers his whole chest, and he caught me looking, then breathed in—and he just kept breathing in! Now he’s holding his breath while staring at me!” Gear said.

“Oh, yeah,” Large Hat said. “It’s for divers and miners, mostly. They can just take an entire tank’s worth of air with them, without having to carry it. They don’t even need to breath for long periods of time! Useful stuff.”

“It’s creeping me out!”

“Spider, I know you don’t like augments, but they’re everywhere. You really need to get over it. They’re perfectly normal.”

Just then, Gear felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around and saw the augmented earth pony just behind him, chest proudly on display with the dials all maxed out.

Gear jumped in surprise. “Gahhhhh!”

“fddddddddddddtsbsdajjjjjj” Gear typed out on his keyboard.

Ponies on the subway turned to look at Gear, who was clutching his chest and gasping for breath. The large earth pony chuckled and began exhaling. The whirring noise stopped, and he held out a hoof to Gear. Gear ignored it and pulled himself up, grumbling.

“Sorry ‘bout that, mate. Just showin’ off, didn’t mean to scare ya,” the stallion said.

“Well, you don’t need to flaunt it all over the place like that,” Gear said.

“Sorry, mate. Though you were ‘mirin.”

“Well I wasn’t!” Gear snapped.

“Alright, mate. I’ll leave ya to yer prejudice. It helps me keep my job, and I can’t really hide it. No sense being ashamed of it.” The stallion returned to his seat.

Gear just stared out the window until his stop arrived. He ignored the many looks and the muttering of ponies around him, even from the old mare who’d offered him a seat. When his stop arrived he hurried off the train and trotted out of the station. He hurried home, not stopping to get anything from Curry’s place, and locked himself inside his apartment.

He heated some water and made himself instant noodles, then sat down in his favorite and only chair, then focused back on his goggles. “I’m home.”

“You alright, Spider? You mashed out nonsense then went silent for a while there,” Large Hat asked.

“I’m fine. Let’s just play something. I need to get my mind off things.”

“Fair enough. Equestrian Warriors awaits!”

The sound of the game drowned out the noises from the rest of the apartment, and the night grew longer.

A New Tenant

View Online

Amperage trotted out of the doctor’s office in Cloudsdale with a wave behind him. The nurse waved goodbye, and he took off into the evening sky. He gingerly touched the bandages the doctor had patched him up with, and felt a stinging sensation. The wounds had been disinfected, and only one of the scratches needed sealed shut, but the disinfectant still stung a bit. The doc said he was lucky his eye hadn’t been hit, and with any luck, it wouldn’t leave a scar. Amperage wouldn’t have minded if that one scarred, as he thought it might add to his rugged good looks. But still, he was fine, and he hadn’t gone blind. Thank Celestia for that!

Amperage dug around in his coat and pulled out the business card. He smiled to himself and did a roll in the air happily. He’d gotten a mare’s number! A unicorn mare no less! He’d probably hear it from some of the guys, but hot damn if he wasn’t happier than a rat in garbage!

He knew all about the neat things a unicorn could do in the bedroom, but he’d never had the opportunity to experience it. A unicorn that was adept with their magic could make all sorts of fun things happen, and stimulate any part of the body without their hooves. They could literally touch you all over!

Amperage kicked his legs in the air in excitement. He really couldn’t blow it. He’d have to play off his injuries when they met, maybe pretend it was a rougher encounter than it had been. But he was lucky to have not lost an eye, that might be enough to impress her.

He flipped the card over and looked at the name: Nom de Guerre. That was such a strange name. Gear said it might be Prench, but Amperage didn’t know. He also didn’t care.

Amperage flew home and alighted on his perch. As a pegasus he had access to the cliff-side or top-floor towers. They were reserved around Middle Canterlot for pegasi exclusively so that they had places easy to take off from. So many pegasi worked in Cloudsdale as worked in Canterlot that it had become a necessity, so it was an unspoken agreement among realtors to sell them to pegasi.

Amperage unlocked the door and went inside. He held onto the business card and tossed his coat to the side, then flipped his goggles down over his eyes. He winced as they pressed on his wounds, but it went away quickly enough.

He filled out his work-related injury form, complete with the doctor’s information so they could verify it. As soon as he was done, his closed those windows and brought up the phone.

He looked at the card again: Loafer’s Bakery. Owner by the name of Six-Grain. Nom de Guerre said she was staying there. Did that mean she might be leaving soon? He hoped not. He could at least bring it up with her, but he said he would call tonight, so he would do that. Amperage dialed in the number, then hit send. He leaned back onto his beanbag chair and waited.

Eventually, a deep stallion’s voice answered the phone. “Loafer’s Bakery: We always rise to the occasion. What can I do for you?”

“Hello, my name is Amperage. I was given this number by a mare named Nom de Guerre? She said she was staying at your location.”

“Hmm? I’m not sure what you—” the timbre of the stallion’s voice suddenly changed “—Oh! Nom de Guerre! Of course, of course! She’s right here.”

There was a fumbling sound as the stallion removed the phone from his ear, then nothing until Amperage heard a mare’s voice on the line.

“Hello, Amperage.” Her voice dropped with sensuality, and Amperage couldn’t help but shiver as she spoke his name.

“Hey, Guerre! It’s alright if I call you Guerre, isn’t it? I said I’d call tonight. I had to stop by the doctor’s office and fill out some paperwork, but I’m finally home! It’s been an exciting day. How are you?”

“I’m doing quite well, thank you. You may call me Guerre if you like, but I do not wish to engage in small talk. I must meet with you as soon as possible. Where do you live?”

Amperage sat up. Was this really happening? Did he really luck out so quickly? All the other one-night stands he’d had were always playing coy and hard-to-get, or they wanted him to buy them drinks and shit. They were never so straightforward.

“Uh… sure! Tonight?”

“Yes, tonight.”

“Well, I can come pick you up if you don’t mind being carried. It’d be quicker than the subway ride up here.”

“That will do. My dignity is not so fragile that I cannot be carried.”

“Well, great! I can find Loafer’s place and be down there within a half hour. Will you be ready?”

“Yes, of course. I am ready right now. I knew you would be calling.”

She was that excited to see him? This was getting better and better. “Sure, I’ll be down right away, then! See you soon!”

“See you soon, Amperage.” She emphasized his name and he shivered again. Damn her voice was sexy!

Amperage hung up and dashed into the bathroom. He gave himself a once-over with some deodorant, rinsed his face and hooves, then looked at what clothes he might wear. He immediately just tossed them back in the closet and dashed out the door. If tonight went the way he wanted, he wouldn’t need clothes!

Amperage locked the door behind him, then dove off his balcony and began gliding down to Ponyville. While he flew, he pulled up a map of Ponyville in his HUD and looked for Loafer’s Bakery. It was pretty unpopular, which made him question why a mare as pretty as Guerre would be staying there. Maybe the rent was cheap? It was even in a pretty nasty part of town. There was a related story that showed several ponies had gone missing in that area over the past month or two. At least it wasn’t too far away from Eternal Lights and the grocery store Gear and he had stopped at. That made it passingly familiar.

Come to think of it, Amperage thought, she did seem a little bit too eager to come to his place. Maybe she was playing him? The thought was worrisome, but as long as he played it safe, checked for weapons, and double-checked things to make sure he wasn’t going to be robbed blind if she did try to take advantage, he should be fine. He should let somepony know what was going on, though.

Amperage pulled up his messenger and logged on to Buzzbook: The online messenger service everypony used. He immediately saw a message from his boss claiming that his medical claim was bunk. He was expecting that, but he’d played this game many a time and he was ready. He’d deal with that tomorrow, though. Tonight was for mares.

Amperage decided against letting his boss know he was going to get laid, and looked at his other messages. To his surprise, he found one from Gear Grinder. He hadn’t expected the stallion to bother messaging him, as the stallion was too uptight. But it looked like he had an extra reason: Amperage had forgotten his techmantic antenna.

Amperage grinned. It had—of course—been a plot to get him to contact him, but he thought he was going to have to make the first move.

Amperage sent a message back: “Hey, yeah! Thanks for holding onto it for me! At least it wasn’t stolen. I’ll send you a message when I can come pick it up, but tonight, I need to let you know: I’m meeting that unicorn mare. The one from Ponyville? She totally wants to jump my bones, dude. She’s coming to my place, so if I’m dead or robbed, I need you to call the police on her, okay? I’ll message you in the morning. If I don’t, I’m probably dead. But at least I got laid!” He added a small picture of an excited pony at the end, then sent it.

Gear would take things seriously. They were new friends, after all. The main thing was that somepony knew he was alive right now, and what was going to be happening. That was the last bit of peace of mind he needed. Now he could get lucky without a care in the world. Amperage flipped up his goggles and swooped down to the place marked by his HUD.

He smelled it before he landed, and it only took a little bit of searching to find the bakery once he’d caught the scent. It was a small place, with a single smokestack and no seats. It looked like the owner lived in a small corner of a larger building, with his entire livelihood on the bottom floor, and his living space above. He wasn’t sure where one building ended and the shop began, but it probably wasn’t very impressive.

Amperage walked up and rapped on the counter. “Excuse me, I’m here to see Nom de Guerre? She lives here.”

The scarred and ugly pony at the counter responded in that deep voice he remembered from the phone. “Ah! Yes, yes. Guerre is upstairs. I will fetch her for you.”

The pony disappeared, and came back down with the green unicorn with the orange mane he remembered from the grocery store.

“Greetings… ‘Amperage’.” She reached out and took his hoof in hers. He felt a chill travel down his spine at her voice and touch, and he wanted nothing more than to hear her speak his name again.

“Hello, Guerre. I, uh…” Amperage lost himself briefly in her impossibly bright yellow eyes. He struggled to continue speaking. “Are you ready to go?”

“Of course, I just need to say goodbye.” She turned to the bakery owner. “Well, I’m leaving now, Six-Grain.”

Six-Grain looked up from the dough he was kneading and his angry face broke into a smile. “Farewell, Nom de Guerre. It was a pleasure having you here.”

“It was indeed. Thank you very much for the food and lodging. But be careful with your work. I worry you might one day—” she paused “—‘work yourself to death, Six-Grain’.” Nom de Guerre turned away from him and looked back up at Amperage. “Let’s go. I don’t want to stay down here in this cesspit any longer.

Amperage listened to the exchange, and briefly wondered why Six-Grain was working so hard so late at night. The sun was below the horizon, and the last light was disappearing. It didn’t make sense to be baking anything fresh when most ponies would be in bed.

Nom de Guerre touched his withers and all thoughts except getting her back to his place left his mind. “Of course! As my lady wishes!” He lifted her up, and she smiled a small smile, then put a hoof on her straw hat to hold it in place, and Amperage jumped into the air.He flew upward in a lazy spiral, then aimed for home.

He’d get her home, and they would… they would… what was he going to do with her? He couldn’t quite figure it out. But when his balcony came into view and he landed, Guerre pulled his key out and unlocked the place herself. She’d let him know what he would do. He knew it.