After a quick bout of corruption Mayor Mare is recalled and the ponies rush to fill her place.
Mayor Mare was seen as the political matriarch of Ponyville. However, when the Foal Free Press uncovers an embezzlement scandal, Twilight Sparkle finds a line in the town charter that allows for recall elections. Election fever grips Ponyville as everypony tries to secure their fifteen minutes in the sun.
Three inky hooves clapped together in celebration as a youthful cheer sounded through the editorial offices of the Foal Free Press.
“Great work girls! Another story well done,” Scootaloo said with triumph.
Beaming with pride she took a freshly printed copy of the newspaper and held it up to the late evening light that streamed into the otherwise dark and musty basement. The Cutie Mark Crusaders had been so excited about this particular story that they had made sure to personally partake in the inking and pressing of the newspaper. They and Feather Weight had stayed long after school had finished in order to make sure that this latest edition hit every possible standard of professionalism.
“I’m so glad that we’re doing real news again. This is what I’ve really wanted from the start.” Sweetie Belle was unable to keep a smile from stretching out her face. “I’m sure we’re going to have everypony’s respect again.”
Apple Bloom clapped Featherweight’s hoof in congratulations, a gesture he meekly returned. “Featherweight, ah don’t care what anypony says. You’re a much better editor than that Diamond Tiara. For once we’re actually reporting on stuff that ponies in town need to know about,” Apple Bloom said proudly, her head held higher at that moment than it had ever been when Diamond Tiara had been sitting at the editor’s desk.
Featherweight, ever bashful, and who was often more comfortable behind a camera than in the limelight, mumbled his thanks to the ecstatic fillies.
“You’ve all done a good job. Go home and get some rest. I’ll see to it that this edition is on every newsstand in Ponyville by tomorrow morning,” he said quietly, taking up a stack of newspapers and setting them proudly on his desk. “I’ll personally deliver this batch myself. Good night, everypony!”
It was his mix of humility and firmness that endeared his fellow journalists to him. He was fair, objective, and always strove for quality. However, he also considered the feelings of his staff, the paper’s prospective readers, and the subjects of their stories. Under his leadership, everypony expected a bright future for the Foal Free Press.
There would be no more blatant yellow journalism. No more lies and embellishment. Diamond Tiara’s reign of terror was over. The era of hard hitting news had finally begun. The Cutie Mark Crusaders – blackened and smudged by the ink of the presses – cheerfully left the school house, each one of them with a spring in their step.
“Ah can’t wait to see the looks on everypony’s faces when they see what we’ve found. This is the sorta thing the big ole hotshots in Manehattan write about,” said Apple Bloom.
Scootaloo concurred, the flutter in her wings speaking to her excitement. “Ya know, maybe we’ll even win an award! We’ll be heroes! Everypony will look to us to keep Ponyville honest.”
They headed off with the sun at their backs, visions of their future writing careers (and future cutie marks) dancing before their eyes in the orange of a promising twilight. The sun was setting on the old Foal Free Press. Surely the new one would make a real difference.
They had no idea just how big a stir they were about to cause.
* * *
The betrayal boomed off the pages of the press, the headlines singeing everypony’s eyes and driving a stake through the heart of their collective trust. There it was, as plainly seen as lightning in a field, the story coming out of the Foal Free Press soon corroborated by inquiries and follow up reports: Mayor Mare, long time political leader of Ponyville, had been using public money for her own personal gain. The full-color picture on the front page had shown the gray-haired earth pony lying back lazily for a hooficure. Her chair was of the finest satin. Her feet dangled in the air. Her face beamed mockingly from behind her gilded spectacles. Before the three crusading fillies had risen out of bed, Ponyville was already abuzz.
That morning the Cutie Mark Crusaders walked through town utterly oblivious to everypony’s reaction. Feeling only anticipation, they eyed the newsstands. They spied on and followed those who had bought anything that looked like a paper. Sweetie Belle just couldn’t keep from shaking.
“Ooh, I feel like it’s Hearth’s Warming Eve! Only it’s hot and there are no presents out here!” she squealed, dizzy with visions of future fame.
“Don’t worry. Our cutie marks will be our presents,” Scootaloo said; her cockiness seemed appropriate for once. Across the street she saw three mares at a newsstand, their faces intent and downcast. “Look, they’re reading it!” She trembled as she shook a hoof in their direction. She had meant instead to point, but she couldn’t keep any part of her body still. Her heart was racing.
As they got closer, the fillies were alarmed to find in the mares voices a tone not of excited interest, but something bordering on shock and disgust.
“Is… is this some kind of joke? This can’t be right! It just can’t be!” Daisy said, her voice rising. There was a glow in her eye as she glared searchingly at the newsmare.
“Hey, I don’t make up the headlines; I just sell the papes. I’m as surprised as you are.” The newsmare shrugged. “You look like you wanna bite my head off.”
“Well,” Daisy said, turning to Rose, “what do you make of this?”
The other mare was transfixed by what she was reading, her eyes going over the words again and again as though she might find something new with each pass.
“Rose? Rose? ROSE?”
Rose, pulled from her reverie, seemed ready to stumble upon the pavement as she regained her bearings. “Uh… oh, I don’t… gosh; I don’t know what to think. Don’t you suppose that maybe they’re just making it up? You know, like last time?”
“I want to agree with you Rose,” Daisy said, ignoring the grocery bag on her back that was coming loose. “But this article -- it’s not like the other ones they used to do. This one looks pretty well researched. They’re not just writing their hooves off. They’re citing sources here! This is scary!”
“I’ve gotta admit, I’m with Daisy here,” the newsmare cut in, tapping a hoof on the counter to accentuate each point. “I see a lotta papers and magazines here. You can usually tell the quack tabloids from the real deal. This is some real dirt, I’ll tell ya that. And these sources here, these are some pretty solid sources. I know some of these ponies. These are ponies you could go right up and talk to. Whether it’s true or false, I bet we’ll know by noon. And if it’s true, Mayor Mare is gonna be stuck in something deep.” She shook her head in resignation to fate.
Rose was hysterical now. “But this doesn’t make sense. Those little brats have to be lying again! Mayor Mare would never do this to us. She wouldn’t. She –”
This behavior frightened the Cutie Mark Crusaders. On one hoof it sounded like the adults were complimenting their work. But on the other, it didn’t sound like they liked what they were reading or the ponies who wrote it.
“Girls? We did the right thing, didn’t we? I mean, it was a good story, wasn’t it?” Sweetie Belle asked tentatively. Her voice quivered now, but not with excitement.
“Ah… ah think so…” Apple Bloom sounded completely unsure herself.
Scootaloo, fidgety before, was now motionless and deep in thought.
Before the day was out the story would cast Ponyville into a pall of uncertainty.
* * *
All over town ponies read the story and then conversed about it with whomever they could find. Strangers would stop in the street shaking their heads and asking questions of each other that nopony could answer. Surely this was some kind of terrible jest! Surely, the Foal Free Press was being the grimy, self-promoting rag that the town residents had known it to be. Their Mayor Mare couldn’t have been involved in any activity that would betray the public.
At first, many shared Rose’s reaction. The initial reports were ignored, shunned, and laughed at even. So ridiculous did it all seem. But there was something different about this affair. The laughs became nervous and uncomfortable, such as when a mare chuckles uncomfortably when her foal says something difficult and embarrassing in the presence of polite company. Something about those photographs demanded more than a simple laugh. As more ponies followed up on the story and more questions came to Mayor Mare’s doorstep, it could not be denied that something was wrong.
It was a remote possibility, but if Mayor Mare had indeed embezzled public funds, then the matter had to be looked into immediately. It would be a light hearted affair, of course. Everypony knew the Mayor was innocent. Somepony who everypony knew to be fair, balanced, kind and objective would be on the case, and she would report back to everypony that it was all a cruel misunderstanding. The Foal Free Press would be laughed off for what it was. Life would soon return to normal.
For the job an independent council had unanimously chosen Twilight Sparkle to look at the evidence and return with her findings. Ponyville expected now that it would have time to breathe. However, the investigation was a fairly quick one, and the results were a bucket of cold water to the face on what was otherwise expected to be a dry spring day. Twilight had even decided to wear a brown deerstalker, so lightheartedly had the investigation begun. Now, the evening she was to deliver her report, she feared her getup would only make her into an unwelcome and erudite dasher of hopes.
The town hall multipurpose room at first had the air of a party. Derpy Hooves had brought muffins and had passed them out to everypony without breathing a word of the scandal that formed the backdrop of their gathering. Filthy Rich told supposedly funny work-related stories that only a quarter of the room laughed at and even fewer understood. Lyra complained loudly to Bon Bon about a trip she had recently taken to Manehattan and some ruckus she had passed on her way through Prancesylvania Station. Twilight had to force everypony to remember that they were gathered for serious business.
“Hey! Hey, everypony! Come on! Settle down!” Twilight picked up a polished gavel that had been sitting innocuously on a desk and hammered on the table surface. A full twenty minutes were spent simply trying to get everypony quiet.
When everypony looked in her direction they were surprised to see Twilight’s countenance, for it was completely at odds with the carnival atmosphere. Had her investigation turned up something unexpected? Everypony knew the mayor was going to be innocent in the end, so why did Twilight look as though she had just placed third in a thaumaturgy fair?
Twilight let out an exasperated breath.
“We need to talk everypony. Take your seats. I’ve discovered some things that this council needs to see.”
* * *
The presentation took no more than fifteen minutes. Twilight couldn’t help but recall the reports she used to give in school about pony history, some of them regarding a few famous criminal cases. However, there was no elation surrounding the completion of this assignment. For once, this was personal. Silence reigned for a few seconds. Twilight set down her bubble producing smoke pipe on a nearby podium.
“I’m… I’m sorry everypony. There’s no way around it. The picture evidence, the witnesses at the spa, it all seems to point to only one conclusion: that Mayor Mare did indeed, of her own free will, spend that money.” She looked at the floor, shamefaced. One was lent the impression that she was the guilty party and not somepony else.
“Is it… possible that perhaps she was just spending her own money?” Big Macintosh asked carefully. This startled everypony: it was the first question he had asked for the entire presentation. This was getting serious.
Twilight adjusted her deerstalker, fidgeting uncomfortably. However, when she spoke it was with poise.
“The unique striations on these particular coins leave no doubt,” said she. “They were the same coins Applejack won at the rodeo contest.”
Big Macintosh gasped quietly, but audibly. He knew what that meant. Applejack had donated those coins to town hall. They were given in good trust and were supposed to be public funds. His eyes seemed to grow so heavy that they might have sunk through the air. His head drooped sadly, almost touching the surface of the table before him.
“Are you… sure?” Derpy Hooves asked dejectedly, her eyes, for a moment, uncrossed and staring ahead in full attention. (The mere fact that she was even on the council was a testament to the levity with which the investigation had begun. A motley crew of ponies had been appointed to the council, only half of them ponies of well known standing; the others had spontaneously volunteered or been recommended due to popularity. It seemed now, though, that the gravity the situation had taken was making everypony more fully aware of what they were now involved in.)
The question was a redundant one, but Twilight, feeling Derpy’s sadness, felt compelled to answer.
“I know this is hard to take in. I’m disappointed too. But I’ve checked, double checked, and triple checked everything. Mayor Mare… is guilty!” Twilight lightly tapped a hoof on the last word as though she were sealing a warrant.
But what was she guilty of exactly? Nopony seemed to know what the standard protocol was for things like this. The laws of Ponyville were mostly of the uncodified variety. Everypony had just assumed that the mechanisms of government ran as a good watch was supposed to, and few ponies had ever bothered to open it up, so to speak, to see if there were hard rules.
After a short interlude Filthy Rich, who was certainly the wealthiest pony on the council, spoke up. He sat forward and put both his front hooves on the desk, causing it to creak. He looked as though he were about to make a strict point to a fellow business associate.
“Well it seems to me that we can’t have a mayor who is doing things like this. It just isn’t proper. Now, I can’t claim to know too much about politics, but I know quite a bit about business. In fact, now that I think of it, it seems that one is the little sister of the other, you know. And I know that if I had ‘misplaced’ money for a business, then the board of directors would probably have something mighty strong to say about that. Why, they probably would want me outta there.”
“What are you saying?” Twilight asked. “Are you saying that Mayor Mare should be ‘outta here’ too?”
Filthy Rich shrugged neutrally. “Well, honesty is how I do things. That’s how it is in all my dealings. And I think all the other ponyfolk on this council who understand business would agree with me.” He turned to face the others.
“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh concurred sadly.
“At the very least,” Filthy continued, “the Mayor really needs to think about what she did.”
“I think you’re right,” Twilight said while putting away her note cards and pipe, and taking off her deerstalker. “We can’t let something like this go unanswered. I think we should present our findings to the Mayor and the rest of the town and see how everypony feels about this. I just wish there was some way we could do this without being so confrontational.”
The council decided that it would take its findings to the Mayor and the public. They would then see where the matter headed from there. The meeting was adjourned and everypony left the room, the atmosphere markedly more muted than when they had entered. Ponyville loved Mayor Mare. She had always seemed to have the town’s best interests at heart. More than a mere politician, she was like a mother or a teacher.
Derpy Hooves was amongst the last to leave the conference room. Visibly unhappy, she approached Twilight.
“So, Mayor Mare is still going to be mayor after this, right?” she asked, childlike in her air.
Twilight shook her head. “I don’t know Derpy. I don’t know.”
***
The rain outside the library was more akin to a fine and weighted mist, the kind that gently tickled the face and wetted the windows, but did not noisily make its presence known to those indoors. Nopony noticed the rain, and Twilight seemed at times not to notice her friends. She had just finished telling them of the recent council proceedings. They had all come prepared to talk about lighter things, such as plans for future outings. Instead, there was dismay and indignation.
“To think our Ponyville could play host to such corruption!” Rarity said, looking as though she were ready to melodramatically keel over. “What are we to become? Manehattan? Las Pegasus?! It’s horrid! How can we trust anypony now? Who knows what else is going on? What else are they hiding from us? To think my sister’s snooping helped uncover this and that I disapproved of it. I don’t know what is right anymore!”
She finally did fall over onto her conveniently placed fainting couch. There was silence for a moment, for everypony was trying to judge whether or not she was legitimately overreacting or whether her response might actually be justified.
“I’m sure it’s not that bad,” Pinkie Pie said, giggling and unencumbered. “I know the perfect way to get to the bottom of this. Let’s just loosen up, throw a party at town hall, and sooner or later Mayor Mare will feel comfortable enough to tell us what’s on her mind. And I’m sure everypony will forget that they were ever worried about anything.” She bounced at the prospect.
Applejack rolled her eyes.
“But there are rules Pinkie! Ya can’t just break ‘em whenever you want. If I stole something from you would ya throw a party for me right after? If the Mayor was gonna splurge off of my contest winnings, she shoulda told everypony first. What she did was flat out stealing.”
Rarity sighed loudly on her couch. Rainbow Dash, hovering nearby, chimed in.
“You see! This would have never happened in Cloudsdale! Think of what would happen to the weather. Up there if we mess things up then we might drown a whole city. That’s why everything there is all discipline and order. If I were Mayor I would never have spent a single bit on myself.” She landed gently and stuck out her chest, giving her best “leadership” pose.
Rarity sighed dramatically on her couch. Applejack couldn’t help but chuckle at Rainbow Dash’s declaration.
“Right, sugarcube. ‘Cause we all know you’ve never stole or cheated before.”
Rainbow Dash snapped her head in Applejack’s direction and pointed menacingly at her. “Hey, what’s that supposed to mean? You think I would’ve spent somepony else’s money on some silly, fru-fru make up nonsense?”
Applejack stuck her nose in Rainbow Dash’s face. “No, course not, sugarcube. I think you’d have spent somepony else’s money on tickets to a Wonderbolts race or on a new toy or something.”
“What? No way! Not somepony else’s money. Not if everypony was counting on me and looked up to me.”
Rarity sighed loudly and dramatically on her couch.
Twilight paced to and fro, looking frantically through several piles of books. “Spike? Have you found anything yet?”
“Well, there are plenty of books on Canterlot legal statutes.” The little dragon scarcely looked at each title before tossing it over his shoulder. It was early in the evening, but already there were bags under his eyes. “Plenty of rule guides for games and what not. There’s some stuff about the history and development of Equestrian law from the Pre-classical era to the modern day. But I can’t find anything on Ponyville.”
“How could a town have been founded without anypony deciding to write anything down? How can things be so disorganized?” Twilight then let out a deep guttural sound the likes of which her friends hadn’t heard since the last time one of her letters to Princess Celestia was tardy.
Rarity (once more) sighed loudly and dramatically on her couch, flailing about before falling off and hitting a pile of books. The crash of the unicorn and the cascade of books temporarily brought everypony to silence.
“Yessh, Rarity, would you control yerself. You’ve been acting a might stressed today. Something the matter?” Applejack asked her while everypony stared.
Lying amongst a sea of books, Rarity struggled for a moment to get up. “Oh, no. No. I’m all right. I… I just hope this affair doesn’t turn into a bad soap opera or anything.”
“Well you’ve gotta keep yerself together first. You’re looking like a bad soap opera yerself right now.”
Applejack lent Rarity a hoof and pulled her onto her feet. As Rarity composed herself she lifted one of her hooves off of the cover of a book she had fallen on and stared at it before calmly levitating it over to Twilight.
“Would this help you?”
Twilight’s eyes lit up as she read the cover. “YePlenipotentiaryPonyville Bill of Precedents.”
She quickly pried open the flaked and dusty cover before proceeding to flip through the pages. She turned the leaves so rapidly the others thought it a wonder that she was able to see a single letter. Outside the rain could finally be heard pelting the window.
Twilight beamed. Her face was transformed; her eyes were like radiant sunbursts. “Oh my gosh! Do you know what this is?”
“A cupcakes recipe for rainy days and political intrigue?” Pinkie asked.
“No, this is a copy of the town charter and several supporting documents!”
“Does it say anything about how to handle this?” Rarity craned her necked to get a look, but then recoiled at the musty smell.
“Well, not really. It looks rather informal, as though it was written hastily by somepony with little time or experience, definitely the sort of thing settler or farmer ponies would write. But it is rather old and certainly official, definitely the first real body of law for Ponyville that I’ve ever seen. From what I can see it seems to imply that any money under the mayor’s control can be disposed with as she wishes, seeing as, if she does have that money, it is assumed that she underwent some kind of appropriations process to get it. But…”
“Yes?”
Twilight tilted her head closer to the text. “It does say that if there are reasonable grounds for concern surrounding the conduct of the mayor, then a citizen or citizens can unilaterally call for a recall election. Any mare or stallion can nominate a candidate or run themselves…”
Rainbow Dash’s eyes lit up.
“So if I wanted I could be mayor?” she inquired excitedly.
Twilight continued flipping through the book, speaking while scanning the pages. “You have to win an election though. And we still haven’t decided what we’re going to do.”
“We? Didn’t you say ‘citizen or citizens’?”
“Yes, but…”
“Then there you have it. It’s time Ponyville had a leader with integrity, honesty, and guts, the kind of leader who doesn’t have time for nonsense and secrets and lies. That leader is me.”
“But I’m sure there’s some other way we could work this out. I’m sure Mayor Mare is sorry.”
Rainbow Dash bounded around the room as she made her pitch. “I’m sure she is. But she had her turn and she blew it. Now it’s is time for a Pegasus to be in charge! Why not me? I’m already wildly popular. Everypony loves me. I know how to organize events and mobilize ponies. Sounds like I’ve already been a mayor before. It’ll be a piece of cake.”
Cake? Pinkie’s ears perked up.
“You really think so?” She licked her lips, making an obscene slurping sound.
“Sure. Easy as pie. With whipped cream and a cherry on top.” Rainbow Dash dismissively waved her arm.
“In that case, I think I’m gonna run too!” Pinkie exclaimed, jumping and wiggling her legs like some kind of spring-laden toy.
“What?”
“Yep. I’m really good handling other ponies money ‘cause I work in a bakery, so you know I’m reliable. Everypony knows that. And, you remember that time I promised everypony free samples? They really loved that! They were cheering and hollering and screaming. I bet if the election were held that day, they’d have all voted for me right there.”
Rainbow Dash scoffed and shot her pink friend a patronizing smile. “You really think you could handle that kind of work, Pinkie Pie?”
“Why not? I’m friends with everypony. You know how much work it is to be friends with everypony? But for me it’s not work ‘cause it’s just what I do. It’s fun! And what better pony to be mayor than one who thinks the job is fun?” She continued jumping up and down, her prospects becoming further cemented in her mind with each bounce.
“Girls,” Twilight interjected, “don’t you think you’re getting a bit carried away? We haven’t even told anypony about this law yet. They don’t know what’s about to hit them. Does Mayor Mare know you all are planning a cake-laden coup d’état?”
Rainbow Dash’s face scrunched up. “Koo de what?”
“I’ve heard of those. Those are like hors d'oeuvres, right?” Pinkie said.
Twilight shook her head, looking up from the book for just a second.
“No no no. Coup d’état. It’s a political term.”
“Well, that egghead political mumbo jumbo is what got us into this mess,” Rainbow Dash said dismissively. “Ponyville needs a leader who everypony knows is going to do the right thing without thinking too hard about it. With me, what you see is what you get: pure awesomeness. Isn’t that right, Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy, who hadn’t said anything up to that point, suddenly looked very uncomfortable, for she didn’t like being caught in the middle of debates between her friends, and she made especially sure to avoid topics like political snafus.
“Um… well… You’re all good in your own way. I would vote for you all if I could.”
“Well you can’t!” Rainbow said forcefully. “So, who are you gonna vote for? You’re gonna vote for me, right?” She inched toward Fluttershy, her wings spread.
“Cut that out, Rainbow,” Applejack said, moving between the two Pegasi. “She can vote for whoever she wants.”
“I’m just making sure she knows that she has to make the right decision!”
“What right decision? Whatever decision she makes on her own I’m sure will be the right one.”
“Well, in any case, I need to go round up my supporters and fans and let them know that the time has come for their full support. There’s gonna be a new sheriff in town, and her name is Rainbow Dash! I’m gonna go tell everyone.”
With that, Rainbow Dash exited the library and flew away. She did not even bother to close the front door.
“Oh, oh! I need to go too. This is going to be so much fun! Free cake for everypony!” Pinkie Pie said before bouncing off.
Applejack groaned at the prospect of the coming political storm. “Well, I didn’t want to run in this here election, but I have to make sure that everypony has an option other than that crazy Rainbow Dash there. Ya know, an honest pony who doesn’t have her head in the clouds? I’ll see ya later Twilight. I need to go run this by my family.” And with that she trotted right out of the library.
“Goodness, what have I unleashed into the world?” Rarity said, looking rather concerned. “Rainbow Dash doesn’t have a platform at all. She doesn’t know the first thing about running a town. Pinkie Pie thinks that this is going to be all fun and games. Sure she makes cakes for a living, but what does she really know about finance and business management? Applejack is only running because Rainbow Dash is running. She’s not going to have her heart in the right place. I simply cannot allow this. I have to do something.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to run too.” Twilight slapped the book shut and frowned.
A smile, small but perceptible, appeared on Rarity’s lips. She seemed almost embarrassed. “Well, I shall certainly consider it. If my town needs me then I shall generously offer my services. I have to protect it, even from its own overexcited residents. Come Fluttershy. You’re going to help me make sure that the others don’t make a mess of things, aren’t you?”
Fluttershy looked skittish for a moment. “Well… um… I don’t want a mess to be made of anything either.”
“Ah, then we want the same thing! Come, darling. Let’s go make plans.” Rarity gently, but purposefully, pulled Fluttershy with her out the library door, shutting it behind them.
Outside, the rain had stopped. Not a cloud was to be seen, though Twilight had not noticed any of it, for she had been too busy first looking for the legal book and then hearing her friends formulate their plans. She noted the water droplets on the window with surprise before returning her thoughts to her friends and how suddenly they had dashed off.
The residents of Ponyville were notorious for their reticence when it came to dealing with conflict and controversy. In the time since the Mayor Mare scandal had first come to light a sort of phony peace had begun to set in. The brevity of the rain of the other day had lent the town residents the impression that the storm in their hearts would also pass and that with the scattering of the clouds so too would the scandal evaporate. The sky was now a hazy blue, as though somepony had put droplets of cream into it, a light brew for a fresh new morning. The air was still and heavy. The ground was sponged with moisture. Vapor rose from the lighted portions of the pavement and grass, and it seemed for a morning that Ponyville had chosen to forget the scandal and pretend that nothing was happening.
It was with this mindset that Lily took to the streets. She was a skittish mare. She liked for her mane to be neat, her garden to be tended, and for the bricks beneath her hooves to be without crack or chip. Everything had to be just so. All it took for her day to be cast into the throes of an evil uncertainty was one misshapen, out of place happenstance that simply did not feel right. Never mind that there were already many things in her life that could be taken for misshapen.
For example, there was that little hole in the wall of her bedroom that she had never taken occasion to fix. It was a little nick, not too big. She could easily have had it plastered. But it had been there since she had moved in and she had become used to it. It had become a personalized mark of her space, an idiosyncrasy that told her “this is my room. I’m home.” There was that way one of her stairs creaked when she stepped upon it. That too was nice and familiar.
This mindset percolated over to more dire matters too. Though she loved neatness, she also, above all else, loved predictability. She, like many residents, was willing to put up with anything that was part of an established set of expectations. Did town hall run at maximal efficiency? Maybe not, but that was all right. It had always been like that. Did Ponyville have a woeful scarcity of hot water (so much so that the whole town would run out every time a certain dragon took a bubble bath)? Sure, but that was to be expected. Did the trains to Canterlot and Manehattan always run on time? Goodness no! But what are you going to? None of this was cause for panic.
What about a stampede of baby bunnies? The appearance of a zebra? Or (Celestia help us!) a cancelled DJ Pon-3 concert? Not cool at all! Anyone of these things would cause her to become light-headed and dizzy. She couldn’t take such shocks.
As she sat down at an outdoor table in front of her favorite coffee shop she ordered the usual: a slightly caffeinated beverage with a smidgen of whipped cream on top, a doughnut, and a sandwich that she had long ago forgotten the name of (she had had it the first day she moved to Ponyville and liked it so much she would never order anything else in the morning. She had simply taken to calling it The Usual and the waiter always knew what she was talking about).
She had acquired a new habit too: reading the Foal Free Press. She had purchased a copy on her way to the coffee shop, and she did not like the way the mare at the newsstand had looked when she gave it to her. That newsmare was usually of a happy, cheerful sort. However, she hadn’t even looked at Lily because she was too busy reading a copy herself. What story had been so important that she had not even bothered to look her in the eye when she said good morning?
Now Lily was eager to take a look, and when she finally unfurled the paper and eyed the front page it was Mayor Mare’s apologetic face that looked back at her. Lily’s heart sped up. Her hooves tingled. She feared she may faint, for she was reminded of the shock she had felt upon first hearing of Mayor Mare’s wrongdoing. She had hoped that the story would just go away. What had happened now? Would she have to take much more of this? Her stomach churned with a sickening unease as it seemed her innards were being liquefied by fright. She no longer felt like eating.
The article was an apology written by the mayor herself. It was something of a relief to read the mayor’s own words instead of listening to the mystifying gossip that had charged the air recently. It was as though one’s mother was here to explain something scary. But what if mother was the scary thing? Could she be trusted after what she had done, after she had taken advantage of everypony? As Lily looked up from the paper – carefully, as though afraid the world beyond the sheets would be different from the one she had known – she noticed that it was quieter than usual and everypony else was reading the same story.
***
In a woody corner of town the story in the Foal Free Press had also caught the eyes of another group of ponies, albeit ponies of a more charged and excitable nature. In stark contrast to the muted setting of the town square, an out of the way tree house was abuzz with activity and chatter. This elevated structure was playing host to the Rainbow Dash Fan Club. At regular intervals, the club’s members would often meet to gush excitedly about the exploits and antics of their club’s namesake Pegasus.
Their loyalty and devotion to her was unquestioned. Their enthusiasm for her poured forth as water from a spring without bottom. Any given meeting offered a chance for one to observe perfect examples of youthful obsequiousness. However, today’s meeting was especially singular. Firstly, Rainbow Dash was in the building! She was not usually present at such meetings, for she was always out doing the awesome things that made her the envy of every action oriented filly. However, this warm and humid day, she had deigned to proffer her glorious presence for the sake of her devotees.
However, that was not all. The second thunderclap of day related to a mission of great and far reaching importance. The fillies and colts present at the meeting were all aware of the controversy that had taken town hall. After all, everypony attended the school that played host to the muckrakers who broke the initial story. Scootaloo herself had been a part of the matter. However, Rainbow Dash was there that day to make everypony privy to a development that stood to change the lives of every foal in town. Rainbow Dash was going to run for mayor!
An excited murmur ran through the tree house after Rainbow Dash made the announcement.
“Settle down, everypony. Settle down. Yes, it’s true! Yours truly is going to be running for the highest office in Ponyville! This town deserves a better class of politician. With your help, I’m gonna give it to them. Do you appreciate stuffy, arrogant grownups who don’t take you seriously?”
“No!” was the resounding reply.
“Do you like it when ponies you trusted lie to you?”
“No!” was the report.
“Isn’t it about time that all of Ponyville understood just how awesome and amazing I am? And how awesome and amazing you all are?”
“Yes!” The whole clubhouse seemed to jump.
“Well, would you believe that there are some ponies out there who don’t understand that, that there are ponies who think you’re dummies? They don’t think you can make a difference. They don’t think that you’re worth listening to.”
“Boooooo!” the group crowed to the amorphous they.
“Well, I can hear you! Mayor Mare will hear you! And soon all of Ponyville will hear you!”
The cheers and jubilation seemed to physically shake the air, like waves of heat rolling over concrete.
“And why stop there? I think we can be a force for good for all of Equestria! But we have to start with Ponyville.”
“We’re with you Rainbow Dash! We’ll do whatever you need!” Scootaloo said, her wings fluttering involuntarily.
“That’s right, pipsqueak. That’s where you all come in. I can see here that you have a pretty nice clubhouse. It’s cozy and beautifully decorated.” The flattery dripped from her mouth like honey.
“Thanks,” Scootaloo said, beaming.
“And I love these cool posters you have all over the walls,” Rainbow Dash said, referring to the fan posters that surrounded them featuring Rainbow Dash in a variety of poses. She smiled as she looked around her and saw her own face smiling back from all over the room.
“All in favor for this place being my campaign headquarters?”
Rainbow Dash was met with a unanimous aye that seemed to shake the walls. The energy in the room was building with each passing moment. The club house seemed ready to combust from pure excitement.
Rainbow Dash looked proudly at her sea of admirers. “Great! Now, who wants to be a part of my campaign staff?”
“Oh! Oh! Me me me me me me!” was the general response.
Stepping from the podium, Rainbow Dash set immediately to give marching orders to her legion. “Do you all think you can make even more posters like the ones you have here, only with an election themed angle?”
“It’d be no problem, Rainbow Dash! No problem at all. Trust me! By this afternoon we can have this town absolutely covered in your election posters! Ponyville won’t know what hit it,” Scootaloo said, tears welling up in her eyes as she felt more happiness than she could ever recall.
Rainbow was pleased. “That’d be awesome. Oh, and don’t you work for the Foal Free Press, pipsqueak?”
“I sure do!” Scootaloo was feeling faint now. For so long she had wanted to do favors for Rainbow Dash, and now here she was tending to her every election-related need.
“Excellent. Well, would you be willing to do a story about this? I have a lot of things I’d like to do for this town, and I’d love for you to help spread my message. A favorable series of editorials would also be nice.” She patted Scootaloo’s head as she made this request.
“They’re as good as written Rainbow Dash! I just need to get the next addition of the paper printed and distributed and we’re set.”
“All right my friends! Go out and spread the word. Rainbow Dash is here to bring change! Mayor Mare tried to gloss over things in the paper this morning, but now we’re going to show Ponyville that it has real options. Real change. A real leader! I’ll be your mayor! I won’t just sit around in an office all day filing paperwork and doing a bunch of boring, namby pamby writing. I’m going to be out here with you, listening to you and helping you to make this town more awesome! With me on your side you’re going to be free to do whatever you want, whenever you want, and however you want to do it. Who’s with me?”
Euphoria reigned. In the eyes of many of her fans Rainbow Dash had already won.
***
In her standard flamboyant fashion, Rainbow Dash blitzed Ponyville before anypony had a chance to soak in Mayor Mare’s apology piece. No sooner had citizens managed to digest that story did Rainbow Dash and her cohort strike with all the fury and fulgurating majesty of an isolated storm cell. That afternoon the recall election, which had hitherto been heard of only in whispers and rumors, became an established fact, a tangible event that ponies were acting on and responding to. The phony peace was over; the front had lit up with activity. Some were more prepared than others.
Some, such as Lily, stood gawking and dumbfounded as they began to realize just how many posters had been put up in so short a time and just how real this event was to become. These ponies looked at the posters as though they were looking at freshly fallen snow in July, so numerous and eye catching they were. They did not yet feel that they were personally partaking, but instead felt as helpless as those who are forced to sit and witness an occurrence of nature.
Others were more enthusiastic. In the streets could occasionally be seen a fully grown mare or stallion wearing a Rainbow Dash button (for it seemed at first that Rainbow Dash was the only one challenging Mayor Mare). Amongst these, and in markedly greater numbers, were legions of fillies and colts, devotees of Rainbow Dash who ran about passing out fliers, giving speeches from atop soapboxes, and making a general spectacle. Every minute the proselytes were gaining followers. Everywhere hordes of young ones were being drawn rapidly into the matter, for the more they heard of Rainbow Dash’s platform, the more they saw in it something that appealed to them.
“Rainbow Dash thinks we should be allowed to go to school only when we want to! And she thinks recess should be an hour longer! If Rainbow Dash is elected, ponies will actually listen to us!” said one ebullient filly to a steadily growing crowd.
“Wait a minute,” said one calm voice, barely perceptible in the din. “We’re just foals. Can we actually vote?”
“That’s the beauty of it!” the filly returned, gesticulating as she spoke. “Rainbow Dash said that Ponyville doesn’t really have any election rules. I’m pretty sure we can do whatever we want. And even if we can’t, ponies are gonna listen to us if we protest. They have to. That’s what democracy is all about, right?”
Others in the crowd chimed in, the excitement growing.
“Yeah, we’ll protest! We’ll refuse to go to school! They can’t put us all in detention or time out.”
“And we’ll stay up as late as we want!”
“And eat cookies for breakfast!”
“Freedom!”
“WOOOOO!”
“The Foal Free Press said that Rainbow Dash is the freedom candidate.”
“She’s the only one who understands us.”
“Hey! Hey, Applejack! Do you support Rainbow Dash?”
Applejack had been trying to quietly pass by the crowd unnoticed when one of the fillies called out to her.
“You and Rainbow Dash are friends, right? Do you support Rainbow Dash?”
Applejack seemed a bit hesitant for a moment. She carefully enunciated her next words.
“Well, sure. Dash is a great friend a mine.” She smiled.
A few in the crowd clapped upon hearing this. Applejack continued.
“But…Ah don’t really reckon she’s ready to be a mayor.”
The atmosphere changed as the crowd begun immediately to reassess its view of Applejack.
“What do you mean, Applejack?”
Applejack put a hoof to her chin as she thought about how to put the matter delicately. “Well, Rainbow Dash is loyal and kind. I’ll give her that. But ah don’t think she knows the first think ‘bout running a town.”
“But she believes in freedom. You don’t have a problem with that, do you?”
A murmur ran through the crowd as Applejack responded to this inquiry.
“Listen everypony. Don’t ya think that Rainbow Dash is gettin’ ya’ll a little too excited? Ya can’t just do whatever ya want. Nopony can do whatever they want. You’ve got to have a set of principles and then you’ve gotta stick to ‘em. And ah know that Rainbow Dash sounds like a pretty good deal, but is she practical? She needs to have a plan or else she’ll just create chaos.”
A colt in the crowd spoke up.
“Hey, Rainbow Dash told us that her opponents might try to say that!”
“Say what, now?”
“She said that you’d try to say she wasn’t ‘practical,’ or whatever.”
Others started to achieve the same wavelength as this colt as they began to remember things they had heard from their other rallies.
“Yeah, yeah. What did she say again? That ‘impractical’ is just a code word the adult establishment would use for ‘too-much freedom.’ That’s it! Applejack doesn’t support freedom!”
“Is it true Applejack? You don’t support freedom?”
“She’s calling Rainbow Dash impractical! She’s one of them!”
“She’s part of the adult establishment that wants to make us go to school to learn things that aren’t important and boring stuff like that!”
So many foals were shouting at her now that Applejack didn’t know who to answer first. “Now hold on ya’ll. Ya’ll are just putting words in my mouth. Ah didn’t say anything like that. I’m just saying you’ve gotta have a plan in life…”
“We do have a plan! That’s why we’re out here. Rainbow Dash is gonna be mayor and then we’re finally gonna be taken seriously.”
The crowd had begun to mob Applejack. Questions were flung at her from all directions. The flash of a camera bulb added to the stormy impression that she was dealing with rabble rousers. The whole affair had begun to overwhelm her senses.
“Look, ya’ll. Ah really need to go, but ya’ll are taking me the wrong way.”
Shouts and boos followed Applejack as she stepped away from the mob.
One pony called out after her, “Apple Bloom would be ashamed of you!”
“Hey! That’s not true!” Applejack turned and tried to face this accuser, more than frustrated now. “Don’t you call my role as a sister into question! Just ‘cause ah don’t support Rainbow Dash doesn’t mean ah don’t love my family.”
Had she not needed to head home she would have stayed and taken issue with the mob, for it was not in her nature to turn her back on accusations or baseless suppositions. As she left a few more bulb flashes followed. She hadn’t any clue as to why anypony would want to take her picture until she was at a newsstand the next day and saw a copy of the Foal Free Press.
“Outrage! Applejack explodes at reporters, refuses to answer election related questions!” the headline said. Beneath the headline was a picture of Applejack, seemingly in a rage, an expression on her face that made it appear as though she were ready to erupt in anger. In reality, the picture was but one frame of many; this particular one was chosen for the annoyed expression Applejack wore in the second that she had turned to face the crowd.
The mare at the newsstand had her nose in a copy and upon seeing Applejack, her expression turned from surprise to one of reproach.
“My my. What happened Applejack? Exploding at a crowd of foals like that. I never knew you had such a temper.” She smiled, but something about her expression was disdainful.
“What?” Applejack returned heatedly. “Let me have one a those!” She slapped a bit on the counter and snatched up a paper. As she scanned the article it didn’t take her long to see the pernicious influences that were at work.
“Hey! This is all taken outta context!” she exclaimed.
“You sure?” the newsmare asked roguishly. “The Foal Free Press has been pretty accurate lately. They got that story on Mayor Mare down to a T. And now they’re covering this election business pretty well too.”
Applejack growled to herself. “Oh, that Rainbow Dash. This has her hoof prints all over it. Those tiny little fillies believe whatever she says, and they control the only paper anypony in town reads!”
If she did not think Rainbow Dash’s policy to be very sound, she had at least clearly underestimated her ability to rapidly mobilize her fan base. She already had fliers, posters, and a legion of supporters!
If Applejack was going to nip this thing in the bud she would have to work fast before the Pegasus had a chance to gain more ground. And that was not even taking into account the fact that all her other friends, minus Twilight, were starting incipient campaigns as well. She would have to clearly enunciate her own narrative before anypony else had a chance to do it for her.
This whole business made her uncomfortable.
“Rainbow is my friend, as are all the other girls. Just how far am ah willing to take this?”
The harsh flutter of posters and pamphlets blowing in the wind attacked Applejack from all sides. It was a dry, blustery day, and it seemed that even the weather was conspiring to let Ponyville know that Rainbow Dash was on the warpath. Her face, beaming triumphantly from posters plastered on walls, lampposts, and newsstands all over town, lent one the impression that she was ever present and always watching. Her brilliant eyes shone forth from every corner, deep and lucid.
Applejack clutched her bag of groceries tightly as she stopped and cast her eyes down Stirrup Street, the winding cutting into her mane and sending strands into her face. It had been a few days since Rainbow Dash had begun her campaign in earnest, and Applejack had only really started to notice that the atmosphere of the town had changed. Perhaps it was her imagination conjuring up ominous symbolism where there was none, but as she looked down the street she noticed that everypony’s gait seemed different.
There was an air of purpose in their step, as though they were all on their way to business meetings. This wasn’t the Ponyville she knew. Something about their demeanor called to mind the way she saw ponies walk when she had run off to Manehattan as a filly. Cold, seemingly self-contained, and harboring thoughts she could scarcely discern. At this hour, ponies were supposed to be relaxed and leisurely. For most ponies working hours were over, and this was a time for rendezvous with friends, parents settling in, and general lighthearted chatter. Instead, carried on the wind, Applejack could hear the sound of a rally reverberating from a few blocks away. Drums were beating as though a carnival was going on.
Somepony was giving a speech. She could not hear what was being said, but every so often it would be punctuated by an eruption of applause and cheering from the crowd that had gathered. She could not quite put her hoof on it, but something about this just seemed all wrong. She was all for events that helped build a sense of community, such as country fairs and picnics, but there was something too antagonistic in the way Rainbow Dash was doing it. A gust of wind blew across the street sending dust, leaves, and paper into the air. The speech reached a high note, and an especially loud burst of cheering, applause, and drum beating began. Applejack squinted as she turned her face away from the wind and noise and pressed on home.
***
“Big Sis! What’s a ‘reactionary element’?” Apple Bloom cried with frustration. Applejack had just barely walked through the door when she was met with the anguished countenance of her little sister. Applejack was an attentive sibling, and she could tell from the pained look on the little filly’s face that something was really bothering her.
However, it was a most unexpected question, and before answering Applejack tried to wrap her mind around why Apple Bloom would even ask such a thing in the first place.
“Uhh… well. A reactionary… that’s someone who doesn’t really like things to change.” Applejack spoke slowly and quietly, unsure of where the conversation was going and somewhat afraid to find out. “Why do ya wanna know? Where did ya hear it?” she added quickly.
Apple Bloom's words poured forth like water from a faucet, her eyes large and earnest as she looked desperately at her sister. “Well I was at school and everypony was talking about the mayor and whether or not she was going to be replaced and almost everypony in my class wants Rainbow Dash to win and I asked whether Rainbow Dash really knew what she was doing and Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon called me a reactionary element and Scootaloo was acting all weird and everypony was picking on me and Sweetie Belle and trying to get us to vote in this election thing and…”
Applejack interrupted the little filly with a chuckle as she set her grocery bag down on a table. “Heh heh heh. Those two were calling you reactionary. That’s kinda funny. I’ll reckon they only learned that term yesterday. But slow down there. What’s goin’ on? Everypony was picking on you, ya say? And Scootaloo was acting weird?”
Apple Bloom took a deep breath of air and started to pace nervously around the room. “Scootaloo wouldn’t stick up for us when they started hounding me and Sweetie Belle. And everypony in school is really getting into this election business when, really, I just wanted to be a journalist. And me and Sweetie Belle are feelin’ really guilty about the whole thing, ‘cause we were the ones who wrote that article about the mayor in the first place, but Scootaloo doesn’t seem to mind at all. I mean, she was worried at first when she saw that everypony in town was gettin’ all upset, but now she’s a part of it. And I was thinking that maybe if I just told everypony that I supported Rainbow Dash, maybe they’d leave me alone, but I don’t know about that. You always told me stand up for what I believe in and stuff, but now I ain’t so sure…”
Her voice trailed off and she looked at the floor sadly, the weariness of the day palpable in her downcast head and slumped shoulders.
Seeing how the campaign was affecting her sister, Applejack felt a fire begin burn in her heart. It was one thing if recent events made a grown mare feel a little uncomfortable. However, she drew the line when the matter percolated into school and started to make her own sister feel worn out and confused by the end of the day. She was not going to stand for this. Not one bit.
Applejack patted her sister affectionately as she tried to lift her spirits. “Apple Bloom. Don’t you feel intimidated by those ponies at school, ya here! If you don’t support Rainbow Dash, then you don’t need to do anything you don’t want to do. You don’t need to change yourself in order to make other ponies feel better. I told you the other day that I was running in this election too, didn’t I? Now I’m not saying you should support me just ‘cause I’m your sister, but I am saying that you should be allowed to have a choice. And making that choice means that your friends and your family should respect you no matter what that decision is.”
Applejack was pleased to see the smile that had spread across Apple Bloom’s face as she spoke. The little filly raised her head and hugged her big sister, her eyes bright with incipient tears as she felt, for once that day, that someone was on her side.
“All right, Apple Bloom. Go get Big McIntosh and Granny Smith. We need to have a family meeting. Then, I’m gonna go have myself a talk with Rainbow Dash.”
***
Above Ponyville on this windy, blustery day there sat a solitary cloud. It hung in place, its silhouette made silver by the late afternoon sun. Most ponies paid it little mind, but close friends and confidants knew that this was where one could find Rainbow Dash. Even after all the political activity and campaign chaos she had helped unleash, she still found time to take lazy afternoon naps.
She snored loudly, and if one paid careful attention they were sure to hear it. However, for the most part, her snorts and exhales were carried away on the steady wind, off with the leaves and papers and rallying cries and speechifying that blew around at ground level that day. The energy in town vibrated into the dreams of the blue pegasus, and through her head danced visions of crowds cheering for her, of high honors, executive authority, and exalted praise. She dreamed of her first executive order: the building of a massive sports arena the likes of which would attract the Wonderbolts. Then she would be able to see them race every single day! And she would be able to do political favors for them every time they were in town, and they would reciprocate her skill and kindness by granting her full membership in their group.
She could see it and feel it as though it were happening to her already. She could feel the power and the emotion and the sense of fulfillment. She would be able to bring into being everything she had ever wanted.
“Rainbow Dash! Hey, Rainbow Dash!”
A voice called out as if from far away. Another admirer? She had plenty. Rainbow Dash waved triumphantly in the direction of the voice.
“Rainbow! I know you hear me! Wake up!”
Something hit Rainbow Dash on the head and her eyes flew open. Above her was an endless, clear blue sky toward which she was waving. She sniffled and shook her head, trying to break herself from her sleepy reverie. She stretched her legs before rolling over onto her stomach and peered over the edge of her cloud toward the ground. In a meadow below she saw Applejack with her hoof arched behind her head as though she were getting ready to pitch something.
“Huh?” Rainbow Dash blinked rapidly. Speech was lost to her, and the world was still covered in the haze of her sleepy eyes.
A bright red apple sent sailing through her cloud and dangerously close to her body finally brought Rainbow Dash around to her senses. She leapt as vapor from part of the cloud kicked up beside her and a hole appeared where the crimson projectile had punched through.
“Okay! Okay, I’m awake! Hold your horses, Applejack! Yeesh!” Rainbow Dash grabbed her cloud and squeezed it back together before taking it lower. The grimace on Applejack’s face alarmed the pegasus, and she approached her friend cautiously, unsure of what she wanted or what she was going to say.
“Rainbow! We need to talk! You’re taking this election campaign business too far!” Applejack pointed menacingly at Rainbow Dash.
“Huh? Too far? What did I do?” The pegasus winced as though she hadn’t the foggiest idea what Applejack was talking about.
“Don’t you play innocent with me!” Applejack angrily stomped a hoof on the ground and her hat tilted on her head as she shook. “You’ve got the young’uns all riled up, and now they’re goin’ all over town making speeches and causing trouble.”
Rainbow Dash smiled pertly, her head cocked upward with a haughty and amused air as she began to understand why her friend had interrupted her nap. “Oh come on. They’re just practicing their freedom of speech. They heard some good ideas – from me, of course – and now they’re just spreading them of their own free will.”
“Free will? Sounds to me like some of your supporters are bullies.”
“Bullies?” Rainbow Dash leaned forward. “Hey, I didn’t tell anypony to bully anyone. All I wanted was for there to be a lively debate on the issues, and that’s what’s happening.”
Applejack growled with frustration. “Have you even seen what’s goin’ on out there? There is no ‘lively debate.’ It’s just a bunch of ponies givin’ loud speeches or yellin’ over each other. And when anypony disagrees with the mob, they get shouted down. That’s not freedom of speech, sugarcube. And to top it all off, you’re askin’ them to lie!”
Rainbow Dash jumped off of her cloud and landed hard on the ground in front of Applejack. “Whoa whoa whoa! Hold on a minute. You’re calling me a liar now? Since when?”
Applejack pulled a copy of the Foal Free Press out of her saddlebag and held it in front of Rainbow Dash’s face. “Since you told yer supporters to write this. It’s all outta context. You’re tryin’ to make me look like a dodgy, foal hating liar who has something to hide.”
“Hey, the students write that. They just write what they see. If you look like a lying, dodgy, whatever, then that’s ‘cause you came off as one.” Rainbow Dash shrugged innocently.
Rainbow Dash turned away from Applejack as though the matter were settled, but the earth pony jumped in her path.
“Now hold on, sugarcube! You’re not gonna take any sort of responsibility whatsoever? All you’ve done all day is sleep here on your cloud, and you’ve had all these fillies and colts run around in your name.”
Rainbow Dash sighed loudly and flicked her tailed in annoyance. “And… what is wrong with that?”
“I’m saying that you’re the one who’s bein’ dodgy, sugarcube,” Applejack said calmly. “You want everypony to see how awesome you are, then how about you prove it?”
The pegasus raised her brow and her eyes lit up with a perceptible glow of interest. “Oh, really? What did you have in mind?”
“How about you stop hidin’ behind your foals and you debate me out in the open. Mare to mare. You get time to talk and I get time to talk. And we’ll see which one of us the ponies like.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “You sure you want to do that? Everypony might see that you have no ideas.”
“And I reckon everypony will see that you don’t know what you’re doin’!” Applejack shot back.
Rainbow Dash’s wings spread out as the excitement of the prospect of a debate coursed through her. “Oh, I was born for things like this! It’d be a whole lot easier on you of you just backed out of the race silently. But since you want this to be public, I’m sure we can set something up. Let’s pick a time and a place, and I’ll be there!”
She spat onto her one of her hooves and extended it toward Applejack. Applejack smiled and returned the gesture, pressing her hoof against Rainbow’s to seal the deal.
It was high noon in what was surely to become the most important political nerve center in Ponyville’s history: the Carousel Boutique. The operation was small and humble, but the alabaster unicorn standing before the mirror was confident in the nobility of her cause. She was a business mare, a decision maker, and an artiste with passion, heart, and a grand soul. Levitating a curler to her face, Rarity straightened her eyelashes before applying dabbles of blush to her cheeks. The face reflected back at her was that of a leader. She knew that. Her friends knew that. And soon, everypony would know too.
She carefully fastened a set of pearls around her neck and squinted harshly at her reflection before turning to Fluttershy and shooting her a question that, with her tone, managed to sound also like a demand, an order, and a plea all at once.
“Fluttershy! How does this look?” Rarity spun away from the mirror and, with her head tilted upward, planted her hooves in a firm and graceful position, her posture straight and confident. In addition to the pearls, she had on a vivid red silk dress that commanded power and respect.
Fluttershy looked her up and down, trying her best to appear as though she were conducting a thorough analysis. However, she had already seen numerous outfits in the past two hours and she did not have anything new to say about any more of them.
“It’s fine. You look very nice. Quite pretty,” the pegasus said softly. “Mmmmm…”
For a moment it seemed that she was going to say more, and Rarity waited intently. Before long, however, Fluttershy trailed off and became silent. She tapped nervously at the floor with her right hoof, eyes downcast.
Rarity frowned and pursed her lips. “Is that… all?”
“Oh… and the pearls are just lovely. They’re a good addition. You should keep them.”
“Ugh, Fluttershy!” Rarity let out an exasperated moan that startled the pegasus. Fluttershy thought that she had been nice. So why did Rarity look so frustrated?
“Fluttershy, darling, you absolutely must take this a bit more seriously! Don’t you understand what is at stake? Don’t you understand what this is all going to mean? Everything must be perfect, but I require feedback in order to get there.”
Sweetie Belle, who had been listlessly rolling around on the floor nearby, jumped to her feet. Her shrill voice and the sudden force with which she spoke indicated that she could suppress her sentiments no longer.
“Rarity, don’t you think you’ve done enough? I thought you and Fluttershy were going to be doing… you know… dramatic political stuff. All you’ve done so far is try on dresses and stare at yourself in the mirror. What does this have to do with anything?!”
Rarity gasped, eyeing her sister as though she could not believe that a member of her own family could possess such incompetence.
“Sweetie Belle! We are doing dramatic political ‘stuff!’ Have I taught you nothing about style and impression? If a pony does not look like she can lead, then no one will follow her no matter what she knows. If I wasn’t elected because I did not look like the mare for the job, think about how terrible that would be for Ponyville. Can you imagine such a disaster occurring simply because I had become careless with my appearance? How’s that for dramatic? The implications of what we’re trying to do now are of the utmost importance. This could change Ponyville history, perhaps more than any decision I make in office!”
Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes, utterly incredulous before the case Rarity had made. “Are you kidding me? Clothes! That’s the most important thing in politics? Clothes?!”
The little filly turned to Fluttershy, silently imploring her to come to her side on this. Perhaps Rarity would understand if she heard it from a fellow mare.
Fluttershy looked back at the filly, shaking her head passively. If she shared Sweetie Belle’s feelings, she certainly did not make it known. However, at that moment they both established a mutual bond: their discomfort shared a similar source.
The pause was interrupted as Rarity rushed between them on her way to the folding screen behind which she had been constantly changing outfits all afternoon.
“You know what?” she said more to herself than anypony else. “I believe that perhaps the red dress is a little too bold for the moment. Maybe it would look nice for the right occasion after I’ve been elected, but I think it is a tad too fierce for where we are now.”
From behind the screen there came the sounds of fidgeting and the quick ruffling of fabric and cloth. Rarity’s shadow, outlined through the partition, moved spasmodically, as though she were shaking off ants. When she stepped forth it was with a different outfit.
The unicorn smiled as she sashayed toward the mirror. She wore a jet black blazer with silver buttons on the cuffs, and at her flank was a black, pin-striped skirt. Her smile quickly waned as she examined herself, pulling out the sleeves of her white shirt before turning away from the mirror once again.
“What do you two think?” she asked while introspectively putting a hoof to her chin and staring off into space, a pose that she supposed made her look thoughtful.
Sweetie Belle smiled sardonically. “Great! Haha! It looks just great! Now, if we could actually get to work on something that matters…”
“I think black suits you Rarity. The white of the pearls and the darkness of the jacket go together really well,” Fluttershy said, attempting to be more helpful in her analysis this time.
Rarity beamed with delight at Fluttershy’s comment.
“Oh, you really think so Fluttershy? Yes, I agree with you wholeheartedly dear. However…”
Sweetie Belle groaned and threw herself to the floor.
“However…” Rarity continued, “I don’t think this will do. It is a tad too austere. I must look commanding, but invigorating as well. And speaking of invigorating, you would do well to liven up Sweetie Belle. I know you’re tired of my methods, but I’m sure you will soon see how they pay off.”
“You know, Rainbow Dash and Applejack probably aren’t wasting their time on things like this,” Sweetie Belle shot back.
Rarity knew that Sweetie Belle could be rather naïve at times. However, it was not the occasion to suffer such nonsense. The little filly, in the ignorance and impetuousness of her youth, probably did not understand that, in times as these, fashion could be a matter of life and death. Rarity sighed.
“Oh, my dear sister. Maybe someday when you’re older you’ll realize that in helping to me get spruced up today you were offered a front row seat to the drama of a lifetime. You’re too small to see it now, but you soon will. You young ponies don’t care enough about how important it is to properly present yourselves.”
Sweetie Belle went back to rolling around on the floor.
“Geez, now you’re talking down to me like I’m a foal. Perhaps I should have joined Rainbow Dash’s campaign. At least she cares about what young fillies think…”
“Oh, good heavens!” Rarity cried, her eye twitching as she was suddenly hit with a spate of charged emotion. “Would you really conceive of betraying me? Your own family?”
She cleared her throat and composed herself, her right hoof gently caressing the pearls at her neck as she headed back toward the screen to put together another outfit.
“I know you’re just a little tired and cranky right now, so I’ll just pretend that my own sister did not just suggest abandoning me for my political opponents.” As Rarity disappeared behind the screen, the little filly stuck her tongue at her, crunching up her face in a way that elicited a small laugh from Fluttershy.
Perking up for a moment, Fluttershy leaned in close to the young filly. “You know, I think I have the same concern as you. Rarity hasn’t told me anything about how she would run Ponyville if she were in charge. From day one, it’s been all about outfits and poses. I hope she has something planned. I really don’t know what to do.”
Downstairs the door was loudly flung open and the ring of a bell indicated that somepony had entered the boutique. Before the chime from the bell had even completely dissipated hooves were heard charging across the floor and thundering up the stairs. Fluttershy and Sweetie Belle had no chance to react before a pink blur burst into the room and the smell of sugar saturated the air.
“Oh, is Pinkie Pie here?” Rarity called out from behind the partition.
“Yep yep! And I have cupcakes!” the pink mare cried as she bounced circles around Fluttershy and Sweetie Belle. “Here you go! Vote for Pinkie!” She shoved a cupcake in Sweetie Belle’s face before bouncing over to Fluttershy.
“And here you go! Vote for Pinkie!” Pinkie shoved a cupcake into the hooves of the hesitant yellow pegasus.
Fluttershy eyed the little pink cupcake uneasily and held it as though she was handling a baby cockatrice. “Uh… Pinkie. I can’t…”
Pinkie Pie never heard Fluttershy’s protest. The pink blur had bounced over to the partition.
“Rarity! Raaaarity!”
“You don’t have to scream darling. I’m right here. I can hear you.” Rarity poked her head from behind the partition. “In fact, since you’re here, why don’t you be a dear and help me with something? Tell me, how does this scarf lo--”
Pinkie pried open Rarity’s jaws and shoved a cupcake into the unicorn’s mouth. Rarity’s eyes flung open with shock at this flagrant violation of her personal space and she staggered as the saccharine substance assaulted her taste buds.
“Here you go! Vote for Pinkie!” was the shout that reached right into Rarity’s ear. Pinkie Pie proceeded to bounce around the room laughing and snorting wildly. “You all are going to vote for me in the election, right? You’re all my friends and I’d really like your support! I’ve been out all day passing out cupcakes and asking others to vote for me, and if I pass out enough cupcakes I think I’ll leave enough of an impression to get ponies to the polls. You all are going to vote for me, aren’t you? Huh? Huh? HUH?”
Fluttershy sniffed her cupcake before putting it down. She was unsure if eating it would be a betrayal of Rarity. “Um… Pinkie. I’m sorry. I…”
While Fluttershy went unheard Rarity was almost choking on whatever Pinkie had put in her mouth. Swallowing it involuntarily Rarity coughed as sprinkles dotted her scarf. She stepped out from behind the partition, brushing them off with her hoof before glaring at the source of the sugar laden campaign ad.
“Pinkie, darling, you really shouldn’t go around shoving food in ponies mouths when they did not ask for it! I’m watching my sugar intake, and that cupcake was entirely unplanned! Are you trying to fatten me up so that I look horrible on the campaign trail? Besides, I can’t vote for you if I, myself, am running too.”
Pinkie planted her hooves suddenly, the rest of her body rattling in place like the spring of a door stopper. She tilted her head to the side.
“Really? You’re running too?”
She was about to say more when the window burst open and Rainbow Dash stepped in. Homing in on Pinkie Pie she raised an accusatory hoof in her direction.
“You! You’re siphoning off my votes with those cupcakes of yours!” Rainbow grunted.
Pinkie Pie’s lips curled into a bemused smile. “No I’m not. Nopony’s voted yet. You don’t have votes. Besides, I can’t help if little fillies really like cupcakes. Well, unless they’ve never had a cupcake before. Then they could have one of mine. And then they might really come to like cupcakes. And then I could say that I helped somepony like cupcakes who’s never really liked them before. But yeah…”
Rainbow Dash stomped her hoof angrily. “Stay focused here! The point is you can’t go bribing so many of my supporters away from me! That’s not fair!”
“Ah agree with Rainbow here, for once.”
Everypony turned to see Applejack standing in the doorway. No one had even heard her enter, but now, with sweat dripping down her face and her heavy panting as she tried to catch her breath, she was the most conspicuous pony in the room. She sat down briefly, fanning herself with her hat.
“Ah’ve been followin’ these two all day. Rainbow. You really need to keep all your little storm troopers in line. Pinkie. You’ve really gotta stop bribing everypony with those cakes and pies. Ah want for there to be an honest campaign, and we can’t do that if ya’ll are playin’ with people’s sentiments instead of talking about the issues. Now I’m sorry I have to do this, but I think I’m gonna have to stop selling apples and other ingredients to Sugarcube Corner until this election is over. I can’t have my apples being used as ingredients for such shady shenanigans.”
Pinkie Pie frowned; her puffy hair seemed to deflate sadly as her eyes turned into big blue saucers.
“But… but… ponies like pies. Why can’t I give them pies?”
Rainbow Dash nodded her head and faced Applejack mockingly. “Yeah, being a little bit hypocritical there, aren’t you Applejack? You sell pies to ponies and then tell them to vote for you. I’ve seen you do it all the time. Why can’t Pinkie Pie do that? Double standards much?”
Applejack jumped to her feet and dropped her hat, her eyes shining with indignation.
“Sell! That’s the key word here. I sell those pies as part of honest business, and then I ask the community to support me with a vote. Pinkie Pie is givin’ them away. Ah can’t fund bribery! Besides, Ah thought you agreed with me that Pinkie should stop. Now you support her if it hurts me? Who’s the hypocrite?”
Rainbow Dash winced for a moment as she contemplated the verity of Applejack’s words. She was silent for a moment, and stuttered before shooting back.
“Uh… well… I don’t think any of it is fair! You both should just keep food out of it.”
“But you have food at your meetings all the time. That last one in your clubhouse was like a feast,” Pinkie Pie said quizzically.
Rainbow Dash pressed a hoof over her eyes and groaned. “Yes, but we ordered that food. We bought it from a place that was completely unaffiliated with the election.”
“But you were still bribing them with a feast. So I can bribe my supporters with cupcakes! Seems fair.” Pinkie Pie smiled, but it was not like the playful smiles of a few minutes ago. There was something almost imperceptibly dark about her visage now, and nopony seemed to notice that her normally frizzy hair had become straight.
“And Applejack,” Pinkie turned to the other earth pony and smiled grimly, “don’t you believe for a second that you can keep ingredients away from me. Just you wait. Pinkamena Diane Pie has ways of making cupcakes when she needs them.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Now what do you mean by that, huh sugarcube?”
Rarity rolled her eyes and sighed impatiently. She did not at all appreciate the fact that these ponies (her political rivals, no less) had burst into her campaign headquarters without permission. As if that were not enough, they were interrupting the serious sartorial business that she had been engaged in beforehand.
“You all are being absolutely insufferable,” she said with disdain. “Now, would somepony be so kind as to please tell me how this scarf looks. And then afterwards you can all remove your flanks from my house posthaste.”
“You know what’s really ‘insufferable,’” Rainbow Dash used air quotes to accentuate the word, “is how you actually think that trying on outfits amounts to actually getting things done. You would be such a lousy mayor.”
“Well first of all you should probably thank me for teaching you that word, because I’m sure you had not heard it before today,” Rarity said with her nose in the air. “Secondly, I find it hilarious that a rock star candidate such as yourself has the gall to call me insufferable. Your whole campaign is the result of a crude popularity contest. You’re a know-nothing.”
Rarity’s dismissal of Rainbow Dash as a candidate made the latter quite angry. The pegasus flared her wings and crouched down as though she were ready to tackle the unicorn. This move greatly alarmed Applejack, who began shouting at Rainbow Dash, who in turn began shouting right back. Rarity and Pinkie Pie immediately joined in, while Fluttershy cowered before them, her eyes shut and her hooves held firmly over her ears.
“Make it stop… oh, please make it stop…” Fluttershy whimpered.
Sweetie Belle, who had remained silent the entire time, smiled with glee as she bore witness to the first campaign related action that day that did not involve her being intimidated at school. She turned her head and cast a glance at her flank to see if some kind of debating cutie mark had appeared. Disappointed to see nothing, she continued looking at the shouting mares, wondering to herself just when all this was going to lead to the spying, explosions, and intrigue that the movies had lead her to believe would be imminent.
And to Sweetie Belle’s utter surprise there was an explosion! Or so she thought at first. After the mares conducted a good minute and a half of yelling, a bright flash of purple light filled the room and silenced everyone.
“Enough! I can hear you all yelling from outside! What is the matter with everypony?”
Twilight Sparkle stood in the middle of the room, her frazzled mane letting off smoke and dark singe marks surrounding her on the floor where she had made her explosive entrance.
“You ponies have been driving me crazy with all of this! All week it’s been nothing but shouting and arguing and back stabbing. Save it for when the election monitors get here. Then you all can have a proper debate.”
“Election monitors?” Rainbow Dash asked with trepidation.
“Yes, that’s right. You didn’t think I would let you all have a debate without some kind of official guidance, did you? Otherwise, you might tear each other apart like you were about to do here. That’s why when I heard that you all were planning on having a debate, I wrote Princess Celestia asking her about democracy. She’ll soon be sending election monitors from Canterlot to make sure that Ponyville’s election process is not undermined and its citizens not disenfranchised by a bunch of overzealous candidates with malicious designs on power.”
Twilight smiled (not at all bothered that she had just suggested that her friends aspired to be power hungry dictators) and waved her hoof as though she were concluding a class presentation.
“Democracy, after all, can be rather dangerous if the mob doesn’t know what’s best. That’s why we live in a monarchy like Equestria, where only the wise and qualified make decisions.”
“Wise and qualified? Sounds like I’m set then.” Rainbow Dash, utterly unfazed by news of Canterlot’s involvement in the affair, smiled before turning back toward the window from whence she came. “It’s nice to know that ponies from the capital are interested in observing my greatness. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got things to do.” She flew away hastily, and the other mares in the room, feeling that tensions had been defused for now, started to file out of the room as well.
Rarity frowned as she watched her friends go. “Now wait a minute. No pony told me what they think of this scarf!”
Pinkie Pie, who was the last one out, turned and looked at Rarity grimly, her straightened mane obscuring one eye. “Hmm, it looks like it’s cutting off the circulation to you head...” Without waiting for a reply, she marched loudly down the stairs and headed for the front door. Sweetie Belle, careful to avoid the attention of her sister, quietly snuck out after her.
Rarity stood dumbfounded as she pondered Pinkie’s response.
“Now what in the world was that supposed to mean? Ugh, some ponies. Well Fluttershy. Let’s continue, shall we. I want to look my best for when the monitors arrive. I can’t let them believe that all of Ponyville’s aspiring politicians dress like backwater rubes that look as though they’ve spent all day in the woods with a bunch of animals.”
