Utters and Unicorns

by LaysPotatoChips

First published

Weird things happen in the land of Equestria This is no exception...

The land of Equestria has had it's fair share of messed up guest. First it was Spiderman, then Batman, then videogame characters, heck even the Westboro Baptist Church! With all of that, you may think that everypony would be used to seeing this kind of crazy crap all of the time. Sadly, this is not the case. Especially if you're met with a band of walking and talking animals

Chapter One

View Online

Chapter 1:
Farmer Buyer's farm was very quiet that day. Not because of any kind of inconvenience of a big harvest or a big surprise party for any of the animals. No, it was quiet, because everyone was lazing around doing absolutely nothing at all. This, of course, was very uncommon for the inhabitants of the barnyard. Normally everyone would be partying, walking around, or simply chatting the day away. But no, nothing of that sort was happening that day. For Otis and the gang however, it was absolutely maddening. Otis was practically losing his mind over the fact that there was nothing to do. This was evident with Otis continuously pacing himself back and forth down the hall that had all of the animals stalls. Out of complete and utter boredom, he decided to peek in some of his friend's stalls to see what they we're up too. Who's to say, they might be doing something interesting that might quell his boredom. He started with Abby's stall. He looked over into her stall, and saw that she was doing something that he himself wished he could do. Sleep. The evidence of her actually sleeping, and not just staring up at the roof in boredom, was her loud and obnoxious snoring. Needless to say, he didn't bother looking anymore, so he moved on to Pig's stall. Upon entering said stall, he found that it was completely empty. Not much of a shocker there. He then moved on to Freddy and Peck's stall, and found them in a random game of chess, which he absolutely abhorred with every fiber of his being. Next was Bessy's stall, to which she gave him a nice punch in the face for invading her privacy. He expected that, but at least it was something interesting. After giving up, Otis made his way towards a small table with Pip's luxurious three foot mansion on top of it. As he sat down, Pip crawled out of his small house, and climbed up on Otis's shoulder.

"You bored man?" Pip asked in his heavy mexican accent.

"You bet I am." Otis replied with a grunt

"Anything you feel like doing today?" Pip questioned

"I honestly don't know. I mean, it's hot, it's damp, and I've got nothing in my head."

Otis plopped his head down on the table with a soft thud. He then gave another grunt. Pip climbed down from Otis's shoulder and sat down on his muzzle.

"It's not that bad Otis." Pip began "I mean, sure it's kind of boring around here, but something will come up."

Just as he was about to finish his sentence, the doors of the Barnyard flew open faster than Roadrunner on Speed. In the middle of the entrance. He had a wide grin stretched across his face, and his pupils were dilated with joy. Within an instant, Pig began running around like a crazy school girl shouting.

"IT'S HERE, IT'S HERE!"

Pig's incessant shouting and running around managed to not only wake up some of the barnyard inhabitants, but also cause Freddy to jump fifty feet in the air and claw himself on the roof like a scared cat. After a few minutes of jumping for joy, Pig calmed down long enough for him to place a small package on the table that Otis was lying on. It didn't take long for Abby, Freddy, and Peck to come rushing towards were Pig was standing at.

"What happened, where's the fire at?!" Abby yelled holding a fire extinguisher

"Seriously, what's going on?" Peck asked

Freddy was going to say something too, but he let go of the roof, and plummeted about ten feet to the ground. He hit the ground with a hard thud and said

"Ow."

Otis, Pip, Peck, Abby, and Freddy (after he had recuperated from his incident) all made their way over towards the box.

"What is it?" Otis asked, curious.

"It's a magic book!" Pig squealed

"A what?" Peck asked, cocking an eyebrow

"A magic book!" Pig said as he ripped off the paper packaging and pulled out a silver book.

The tile of the book was called "The Magical book of Magic Stuff". Pretty simple title.

"It's not just any book either, it's real." Pig said opening the book to a random page.

"I honestly don't care if it's real or not. Just don't read anything that will cause some, oh I don't know. Portal to open up randomly and take us to another dimension." Otis said sternly

"Aperite portas, et terram suavitatis. De mannis draconum formosi minima. De irides, et crustulam, et partes galore. Equestria tellus estote aperiret nobis." Pig chanted

"Oh no..." Otis said as his ears drooped

"Uhhh. Otis, what's gonna happen?" Peck said worried

"Yeah, what's going to happen?" Freddy rebutted

"Otis i'm scared!" Abby said holding herself to Otis tightly

"Guys relax." Otis assured " This book is most likely some kind of fake spell book that someone made in their mom's basement. I'm sure that this spell has absolutely nothing..."

With a sudden "POP" sound, a rainbow colored portal appeared in the middle of the barn. Otis's blood turned cold as the vortex grew bigger and bigger.
"Milk me..." Otis said as the vortex sucked him, as well as all of his friends in.
Otis, Freddy, Peck, and Abby all screamed as they were sucked into the swirling vortex. They all soon landed with a hard thud in a heavily wooded area of some sort. They all brushed themselves off as the portal disappeared almost as quickly as it had came. Nobody said a word, there jaws just dropped at where they were at.

Chapter Two

View Online

Chapter Two

Otis and the rest of the gang all still had their mouths open agape. This was certainly not what any of them had expected. Heck, nobody really thought that that book would actually teleport them to some random place like this! Otis, understandably, was practically freaking out over what had just happened.

"This is not happening, this is not happening, this is not happening!" Otis repeated as he paced back and forth at a rapid pace

It didn't take long for the others to finally get out of their shocked state. Abby, the first one to actually snap out of it, walked up to Otis and tried to calm him down.

"Otis." She began softly

"This is not happening, this is not happening!" Otis continued to repeat

"Otis." Abby said, getting slightly annoyed

"This is not happening, this is not happening!" Otis said at a faster pace

"Otis!" Abby shouted

Abby didn't bother trying to shout at Otis again, she just grabbed a foam bat and whacked him over the head with it.

"AH! Foam pain!" Otis said as he fell to the ground with a thud

After getting up, and brushing himself off, Otis took in a deep breath and calmed himself

"Thanks Abby, I needed that." Otis said, thanking Abby

Abby gave a nod in approval, and then went over to pick up some of her friends who were still lying in the dirt. Otis, on the other hand, tried to survey the area as best as he could. The only thing that he did find was nothing but trees, trees, and more trees.

"Guess we must've landed in a forest of some sort." Otis said to himself

"Okay Pig." Otis began" Remember that little talk we had about NOT yelling out random latin chants in the middle of the barn?"

"Not really." Pig said bluntly

Otis hoof palmed himself and said

"Do you remember that incident with Winky the rabbit and his other friends?"

"Oh yeah, them!" Pig said slapping himself" I wonder how there all doing?"

"That's not important right now Pig." Otis said ignoring Pig," What we need to do now is try and find a way back home."

"What about that book Pig has?" Abby asked

"Oh yeah, that book!" Otis exclaimed "Pig go on ahead and read another passage from that book of yours, maybe it might bring us home."

"Uhh. Yeah about that." Pig said blushing

"Oh cud! Did you eat it?" Otis said groaning

"Yes..."Pig said ashamed

"Why?!" Otis grunted

"I got hungry. Going through portals like that always makes me hungry." Pig said

Freddy, the second animal to get up, looked at Pig with an intense rage that would make even the most courageous person cower with fear.

"Pig..." Freddy began" I'M GOING TO TURN YOU INTO PORK CHOPS!" Freddy said as he pulled out a knife from his side pocket and waved it at Pig.

"Ah crud monkeys." Pig said before taking off screaming

"Get back over here you fat PIG!" Freddy screamed as he chased after the frightened pig.

Otis and Abby rolled their eyes at what was going on before them.

"Typical Freddy." The two said in unison

"Okay Otis, what are we going to do now?" Peck asked as he shook his feathers to get rid of some of the dirt.

"Look guys, it'll be easy. We'll all get together and try and find a town or something to see where we are."

To the animals, with the exception of Pig and Freddy of course, it sounded like a good idea. It took quite some time to actually try and find some manner of civilization. However, they all soon found themselves about a quarter of a mile away from a rather odd looking town of some sort.

"What kind of town is that?" Pip asked

"I have no idea Pipster" Otis replied "But let's find out!"

Within minutes, they all managed to get themselves close enough to actually see what town they were in without getting spotted. Otis was the first one to examine the area. Surprisingly enough, it was filled with nothing but ponies of different shapes and sizes. Otis sighed with relief at the fact that they wouldn't have to act like actual animals.

"Oh good! Hey guys it's cool, they're all talking animals here." Otis said relieved

"Really?" Abby said cocking her head in surprise

"Yeah really!" Otis responded with a happy yell

"I'm going to go ask one of them were we are."

"Uh, Otis I don't think that's a good idea." Abby said

"Oh relax Abby. They're all talking animals, so it shouldn't be a problem." Otis said confidently

Otis then walked over towards one of the ponies that he was closest too, and tapped her on the shoulder. Plum Sitter, an orange and yellow pony with a orange cutie mark, turned around to greet the person who had tapped her. However, when she saw Otis, her mouth became agape.

"Uh. Hello there. I was wondering what place this is, and where we're at?" Otis said as politely as he could

Plum Sitter didn't say anything, her eyes simply widened with fear at what she had just witnessed. A cow, a talking cow for that matter. Otis's face turned from polite, to concerned.

"Uhhh. Mam, are you okay?"

"T...T...t..t..TALKING COW! AHHHHHHH!" Plum Sitter screamed in horror as she fled the scene

Other ponies took notice at the loud scream and went to investigate what was going on. Upon seeing Otis, as well as the other Barnyard animals who had accompanied him, stood there in shock for a few moments before Otis said

"Uhh. Hi!"

The ponies looked at one another, and whispered

"Should we panic?" One mare said

"Sounds good to me." A stallion replied

After clearing their throats, all of the ponies that had made their way to investigate, all started screaming and running around like crazy. It didn't take long for the rest of Ponyville to join in on the madness and chaos. Meanwhile, Princess Celestia was busy reading another one of Spike's scrolls in her throne room, before getting interrupted by a white pegasi guard pony bursting through the door. Princess Celestia looked concerned at how freaked out the guard pony looked.

"My fellow guard, what seems to be the trouble?" Celestia asked in her kind, timid voice

"We've got a problem in the town of Ponyville your highness! Walking and Talking animals have appeared out of nowhere and now all of Ponyville is in a panic. The only thing that we could find about them was a small portal that was opened up about two miles down the Everfree Forest! We would've taken a better look, but it disappeared before we could try and analyze it."

Princess Celestia slapped her hoof against her face. She knew what was going on, she had seen it a million times. She grunted and annoyed grunt, and said

"Oh for the love of me!" she yelled

"Your Highness?" The guard asked confused

"I'll explain everything later, just get them, and bring them to me." She said annoyed " I'll get the mane six as well."

The soldier bowed in response to her command, and soon made his way back to Ponyville.

"Note to self" Celestia said to herself " Put a spell up that keeps random strangers from entering Equestria."


« Prev Ch 2 of 2

Review
Share: [url=mailto:?subject=Checkout%20this%20Story&body=https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12463995/2/]Email . Facebook . Twitter


Story: Follow Favorite
Author: Follow Favorite


Contrast:

Dark . Light
Font: Small . Medium . Large . XL


Desktop/Tablet Mode . Blog . Twitter . Help . Sign Up