Chapter 1 Nanananana Adam
It was a beautiful night at the Gotham City Museum, the one place that kept long lost artifacts found in wild jungles and hot deserts.
"*Sigh* Sure is peaceful tonight." said a security guard sitting at a desk in his office "Ain't nothing's gonna happen tonight."
BOOM
The sound of that explosion startled the guard, it came from the exibet that held the artifacts. He sped over there to investigate, finding a giant hole in the wall.
In came four people, wearing masks that hid their faces.
"Freeze!" the guard ordered, drawing his gun.
One of the crooks quickly pulled out a can, removed its lid, releasing confetti that wraped around the guard like a rope. He struggled to break free as another one of the crooks used an umbrella, releasing a green gas.
"*cough* *cough* What the heck is this?" suddenly his eyes felt heavy and his legs felt weak. He fell to the floor in a deep slumber.
The four crooks walked up to a glass box with a large, red diamond in it. It was labeled 'The World's Largest Diamond'.
The next crook, who had a feminine look, used claws on the tip of her gloves to cut a hole into the glass, then removed the diamond. As the crooks turned to leave, one of them set an envelope onto the floor.
GCPD Headquarters
"Four people in masks broke into Gotham Museum?" Commissioner Gordon asked on the phone "And stole the world's largest diamond? I'll get some people on it right away." he hung up.
"So Comish, you gonna get Batman and Robin?" asked Harvey Bullock.
"Yes, but judging by what I've heard, looks like this is a case that they might need help with, since it's something that's unlike anything we've seen." Gordon looked at a red tellaphone with a single button, under a glass lid. "And I know the right people." he then lifted the lid and pushed the button as he put the phone up to his ear.
Meanwhile at a stately major. Home of millionare and private detective, Adam West and his youthful ward and partner, Burt Ward.
A red phone rang inside a study, to which an old man, with a mustache and glasses answered "I will fetch them, sir." he set the phone on the desk it stood and left to fetch Adam and Burt.
In the living room sat two men reading mystery novels. One a teenager at the age of sixteen and the other a man in his late twenties or early thirties.
"Hey Adam, why is it that this guy carries that thing around even though he doesn't think he'll use it?" the teenager asked.
"Well Burt, even though he doesn't think he'll need it, it's always good to be prepared. You'll never know when you need it." Adam explained.
"Gosh yes, your right Adam. I'll always remember that." Burt agreed.
The old man then came into the room "Sirs, it's the detective phone."
"Thank you, Alan. Quickly, Burt." Adam said as he and Burt put the books down and ran into the study.
Adam picked up the phone and held it to his ear "Yes, Commissioner?"
"Adam, the world's largest diamond was stolen. We need you here at GCPD Headquarters, ASAP." Gordon said on the other line.
"We're on our way, Commissioner." Adam then hanged up the phone and pulled back a Shackpear bust, reavealing a switch underneath, once turned a book case from behind them slid open to reveal two fire poles labeled 'Adam' and 'Burt'.
They slid down the poles and as they did, Adam flipped a switch, putting different clothes on them. They came down into a garage, wearing brown pants, white buttoned shirts, brown trench coats, and fedoras. They then hopped into a black Lincoln Futura and started the engine.
"Car batteries to power." Burt said "Wheels ready for speed."
"Roger. Ready to move out." Adam pushed his foot onto the pedal and the car drove off out of the garage and headed to police headquarters.
Meanwhile at Wayne Manor. Home of billionaire Bruce Wayne and his youthful ward Scootaloo, known to the public as Ashlyn Phillips.
"Sir, it's the signal." Alfred came into the living room.
Bruce and Scoots turned their heads to the window and saw the Bat-Signal shining in the night sky.
"C'mon." Bruce said as he and Scootaloo went into the study room, pulling back the Shackspear bust, scanning their eyes, opening the book shelf, revealing the elevator.
The elevator took them down into the Batcave where they changed into their costumes and drove off in the Batmobile.
At Police Headquarters
Adam and Burt walked into Commissioner Gordon's office. "Good thing you're here."
"Yes, now are there any clues you found at the scene of the crime?" Adam asked.
"I got something here." Gordon held up an envelope "But you're not doing this alone."
"Oh? Who are we partnering up with?" Burt asked.
"I think that would be us." they heard a kid's voice say.
They turned to the direction of the voice and saw Batman and Robin standing at the window.
"Batman, Robin, meet private detectives Adam West and Burt Ward. They'll be helping you on this case." Gordon introduced.
"I'm not one for being a vigilante, but it's an honor to meet you." Adam shook hands with Batman.
"I heard of you. You solved a lot of cases." Batman said stoicly.
"With your detective work and Batman's, I think we'll make a good team." Robin said.
"Gee wiz, it's exciting that we are finally meeting you." Burt said.
"Now that we're all here, let's get down to business." Adam said.
"Right. Not only did we find this envelope, but the guard was found tied up in confetti and said he was knocked unconscious from an umbrella that gased him. We also found a hole in the glass box that had the diamond, looked like it was cut." Gordon explained. He opened the envelope "What is a water's favorite game?" he read aloud.
"A riddle, confetti, umbrellas, and a stolen diamond? Sounds like we're dealing with The Riddler, The Joker, The Penguin, and Catwoman." Robin concluded.
"You make a good point, but Joker and Riddler are in Arkham, Penguin's in Blackgate, and Catwoman prefers to work alone." Batman said.
"So, it's someone else?" Robin asked. "But who else uses the same gimmicks as some of our enemies?"
"I think I might know." Adam said "Four people who took inspiration from those nefarious images. Cesar Romero, Frank Gorshin, Burgess Meredith, and the beautiful yet dangerous villaness, Julie Newmar." Adam growled.
"Holy unholy alliance. Our greatest foes have united." Burt said, putting his fists together.
"Uh, who are they?" Robin asked.
"They are four criminals who took inspiration from some of Gotham's most heinous criminals." Adam said.
"Okay, so now we know who did it. But what is a water's favorite game?" Robin asked.
"Pool." Adam answered. "You see, Riddler's puzzles are mind boggling, and Frank loves to do the same for his riddles."
"I guess that makes sense." Gordon wondered "There's more: what kind of country is made of plates?"
"China. And where do you play games?" Adam quizzed.
"A park?" Robin asked.
"Precisely. Which might mean that those four felonious feigns are currently at the water park in China town." Adam concluded.
"Eh, you could be right." Robin shrugged and Batman nodded in agreement.
"Quickly, to the Lincoln Futura." Adam said as he and Burt ran out of the office as Batman and Robin jumped out the window, landing in the Batmobile.
The two vehicles then drove off to their destination.
They arrived soon after at the Water Park in China town. They snuck in through the window and made they're way. It was quiet. Too quiet.
"Where are they?" Burt asked.
"Maybe their not here?" Robin guessed until they noticed a man standing next to a pool laughing.
"It's Cesar Romero!" Adam said.
"Holy Jackanape!" Burt said
They then sped over to him, Batman tacking him to the ground, but Cesar kept laughing.
"What's so funny?" Robin asked.
"Oh c'mon, Girl Blunder. You can't see that the joke is on you. HA HA HA HO HO."
Then from a door came out Frank Gorshin, Burgess Meredith, and Julie Newmar, who fired confetti cannons at them, tying them up.
"Holy fourth of july!" Burt said. Then their eyes felt heavy.
"The...confetti...must have...a knockout drug...going into our...spores." Adam hypothesized.
They then passed out.
They slowly opened their eyes to find themselves tied up, a crane carrying them over a tank of water.
"Hahahahaha. Riddle me this!" Frank laughed "What kind of predator lives in the sea? Answer: a shark."
They then noticed a shadow in the water under them.
"Holy Jaws!" Burt exclaimed.
"Farewell our caped and trench coat friends!" Burgess said as he and the others left.
"Why don't they just stay and make sure we die?" Robin muttered.
Batman pulled a batarang from his belt and started cutting the rope.
Is this the end of our crime fighting heroes? Will they be the next victims of a shark attack? Will they never recover the diamond? Find out next time! Same bat-time! Same bat-channel!