Disconnected: Attempting to...

by Kastrinn

First published

Kasic, an unsocial pony, works for a news editorial job in Manehatten. He has an objective to become an author and to work full-time as one. But life has ups and downs, and more downs for Kasic. How will he handle what life throws at him?

Hey... um. I'm Kasic and... do I really have to do this? Fine, fine, I'll do this damn thing. I... am not all that talkative. I'm just one of those stallions that's just in the corner of the room of some party or just secluded to himself. I however have no need for the social interactions... What? "Or so I think"? Shut up and let me do this biography. I work an office job, an editorial for Manehatten Times. It's... a good job by normal standards... but I have a dream of becoming the best book selling author in Equestria. What do you mean "You wish"? "You wish", my flank, just wait and see. I will become an author! And you can kiss this face goodbye when I do!

Heya it's Dontavious back at it again with a different story this time. Man music has a way of inspiration for me. I hope you'll enjoy this story and give it lots of love if you feel like it.

...Arrive to Work on Time.

View Online

...Arrive to Work on Time

My eyes were practically bloodshot. Having been staring at a laptop for a long while without blinking can do that to you. Eyelids felt heavy as I continued typing, a yawn escaping me from the long night I introduced myself to. But this was something I intended to finish. The one thing that could change my life forever.

“Finally!” I exclaimed in tired victory. “And all that's left is to get some rest and get it published.”

Throwing my hooves up, I roll onto my back to get the sleep I deserved. I close my eyes taking in a deep breath, an ear flicking as I suddenly contemplate. “What time is it?” And as if it heard, the alarm clock blares throughout my room letting me know exactly what time it was. Turning my head slowly to glare at the device, it read 5:30 am.

I groan in anger and sorrow, the idea of pulling an all nighter for the third time this week was almost sickening. Rolling over and pushing myself onto my hooves, I slowly walk to the bathroom of my one bedroom apartment. Flipping on the light, I spot and make my way to the sink and turn on the faucet, watching the cold water fill the bowl in known horror. Turning the faucet off, I dunk my head into the almost freezing water without hesitation, letting it awaken my senses for the day ahead. Staying still for a short while, I gasp for air as pulled my head out of the water, flinging water onto the mirror. Rubbing my eyes with a hoof, I prop my hooves on the sink to take a glance into the mirror seeing how truly disheveled I looked. Bags formed under my eyes, my black mane and birch colored and furred face dripping wet as well. Could be considered a zompony cause I looked half dead already.

With a deep sigh, I pushed off the sink, both forehooves landing with a thud on the tile floor and walked out of the bathroom to the window of my bedroom. Opening the blinds to look out at the city, the sky still dark but slowly getting brighter, streetlights flickering off as some other buildings lights turned on as ponies awoke and got ready for the day ahead of them.

“They're probably well rested… no use calling in sick.” I said to myself, knowing my boss wouldn't allow it a third time.

Trotting over to the closet, I opened it via magic and scanned through the various dress shirts I got for work, settling for a plain white and black tie to go with it. Next objective was to get coffee, quickly getting over to the kitchen to prepare some “liquid control” to help jump start my morning as I got everything else ready for work. As per usual routine, I levitated a pair of earbuds to my head, placing them into my ears as I scrolled through the connected iPone music list.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wi1zMj-RXlU

After finally selecting a song, I looked at the time displayed above, pupils shrinking seeing how I wasn't going to make it to work on time. Immediately I grabbed my suitcase and zoomed out the door, locking it after I slammed it close. Swearing that I might've woken somepony up. Hurrying to the stairs, I practically jumped down the steps as I was racing towards the lobby, not taking the elevator cause it'd be too slow. Once on the first floor I flew right out through the rotating doors and ran down the block as early sunlight started to shine upon the city that was slowly coming to life. My newest destination was the transit station, so I had to be quick to get at least get a decent seat on the train car.

“Excuse me! Sorry! Coming through!” I frantically called as I passed through the growing crowd on the sidewalk, getting many curses and swears thrown at me as I rushed by. When I had reached the transit station entrance, the stairs were crowded with ponies. Thinking on my hooves I jumped up on the railing and slid down it, grunting as I landed at the bottom. But that didn't halt my progress. Pulling out my card via magic, I swiped it through the card reader and ran through the gates and made my way to the train. When finally reaching it after sliding down yet another railing, I slid through the doors of the train as it began to close heading towards its next destination.

“Next stop: 105th street.” I heard the transit overhead system call. I must've been lucky because my place of work was a block away.

I let out a breath of relief, setting my haunches down in a empty seat and rested my head against the window. The train jerked forward and slowly picked up speed, being only the beginning of a semi long ride. Turning up the music volume, I somewhat enjoyed the ride because not only the fact that it was crowded, but I managed to get a seat so I was contempt. Suddenly the train jumps slightly, knocking few of the ponies off balance, one of them being pushed up against me. The new found pressure on my chest cause me to wheeze and gasp for air as I try to push the maroon pony off me. The sudden event had caused my earbuds to fall out just as I heard a voice speak to me.

“Oh! I’m very sorry, sir!” The voice was feminine and from the maroon pony I had just pushed off me. My ears just perked as I looked at mare that just apologized to me. For one I was dumbstruck that I got an apology, and two I was noticed on the train.

“It..it’s fine…” I began as I then looked up at the map to see the progress of the train towards the next stop, seeing that we were close. “My stop is actually up next so... if you need a seat… here’s mine.” I finish, not exactly all that confident in my speaking, letting out an awkward cough into my hoof.

“Really? Same here!” I hear her exclaim excitedly, her eyes widening as if she realized something. “Do you happen to work near here? I’m kinda new to the area...heh eh…”

My eyes widen, taking in her question, shaking my head quickly to regain focus. “Uh yeah I do actually... Manehatten Times.” I respond, watching her eyes brighten as a smile grows on her face.

“Wow, this really is a coincidence. I actually was just relocated here to work for Manehatten Times.” The train then came to a slow stop as we reached our stop at last, the moment making it seem even slower. But a hoof wave in front of the face was enough to bring it back to speed. “C’mon now, don’t want to be late to work, now do we?” She said as she motioned for me to get up and follow.

“Y-yeah, don’t want that.” I say, getting up and following her as we exited the station. We walk together, holding a conversation of how the workplace is like and other work related topics. As we finally reach our building, we stop right outside.

“I haven’t caught your name.” She says turning to look at me.

“It’s Kasic, yours?” I reply, turning to look right back at her.

“Autumn.”

“Well Autumn, welcome to the team. Now shall we?” I say as magically hold the door open for her.

“Why thank you, and yes ‘We shall’.” She smiles as she walks through the door as I follow behind her, mentally preparing myself for the day ahead.

Cancelled story. Oof Sorry.

View Online

Doctors Visit:
“Mr. Kasic, is there something you're not telling me?”

I took in a breath, ears flattening as I knew the real answer to his question. “No, sir.” I lied.

“Are you sure? Because something like this doesn't just happen!” He pointed to a chart that had recordings from tests on my magic deficiency. “You are in your prime, you've proven that you are capable of using magic but there is something you're not telling me that caused this drastic drain of mana influence.”

I winced at his scolding, looking down and away from him as he continued. “Mr. Kasic… I… Look at me Mr. Kasic.” I did. “I won't force you to tell me what has happened, I'm only worried because this isn't ok. Looking at previous records we have on file from your foalhood you were above average in your mana influence. I am highly certain that this isn't your physical health that's affecting you.” He finished as he began writing something down on his clipboard and tore off a piece of paper as he then levitated it into my shirt pocket.

“Promise me that you'll make an effort to figure out what's going on. I know it's hard for you, but I know Dr. Listener will be able to get to the bottom of this and help you cope with this.”

I looked at the pocket that the, presumably, address of ‘Dr. Listener’. I already knew the reason why this was happening to me. The internet was to thank for that. Although I can't remember the name, it's a case that happens in unicorns where their magica fluctuates because of sudden emotional trauma and or rarely physical. Although some can be born with this condition, like a growth deficiency but with mana transfer. But the ponies who aren't born with it gets hit the hardest and have to drastically change their way of life after being dependent on it for so long. My case is emotional trauma and I hate to admit it.

I look back at him, ears still flatten more towards my humiliation of having to see a therapist once again. “I'll… I’ll go see Dr. Listener.” I finish with a deep sigh, already knowing what was to come.

“Thank you, Kasic. I look forward to seeing you in better conditions again.” He said as we made our goodbyes and as I made my way out of the hospital with my dignity somewhat in check.

____________________________________________________________________________

(More heart wrench story idea)
Suicide Attempt:
I look at the ceiling that's not my own, the faint beeping is all I hear throughout the room. I don't want to remember why I'm here, why I even ended up here at all. The Manehatten job, the dream and ambitions of an author only to be denied by fate. Oh how life has been unfair towards me, why can't I have success for once in my life?

Tears start to form up, covering my eyes with my foreleg as my teeth grit against one another. I wanted to break down, let it out all there. But I didn't, not in reach of prying eyes that claim to help me but for a paycheck. All the lies and rejections, all hard work and effort put to wasted hope. The world spun faster, my heart ached and longed for comfort. But there was none for me.

“Kassy?”

Then it stopped, time froze as the voice called out to me. I was shocked that somepony came for me. My eyes wide and ears at attention as I turned towards the source, and I regretted being in such a state in front of her.

“Kassy thank Celestia you're ok!” She then ran up to me, forelegs wrapping tightly around me, I doing the same with her. “When I received word you… you… I just couldn't believe it.”

“It's fine Fauna, I'm alright…” I try to comfort my sister, but she wouldn't have it.

“Fine?” She practically screamed. “You are not ‘fine’! You tried to kill yourself!” I winced, feeling every ounce of her disappointment and worry in her voice. “The real Kasic I know wouldn't give up, he'd stand strong through no matter what.”

I looked away from her, ears flattening at my shame. “I couldn't… I can't keep this up…” I start, “I'm not as strong as you thought I was, I hid what I believed would be used against me away. And it blew up on me.” I admitted with defeat, not even looking into my sister’s eyes. “I'm a wreck and there's no use for the broken in a world of advancement.”

“Is that what you believe?” She shot back, “That you have no place here? You have a sister who looks up to you and you're just going to off yourself?”

“And I have every right to believe so! I have never succeeded in what I wanted, I pushed myself to the brink trying to achieve a dream and I got shot down! My past continues to taunt me, limiting me from what I could've become. I can't cope with this forever!”

“And what about me? About the rest of us, your family? You up and left us!” Fauna yelled. “We were there to help you and you showed no care for it.”

“Because…” I choked, trying to form words to lash back.

“Because what? We didn't understand? Well we tried too, we knew nothing about what you were going through but for Celestia’s sake we tried, Kasic!” Tears were already falling from her cheeks, and how it pained me to see her in such a way. “Kassy… please just… come back home.”

____________________________________________________________________________

(This was when I had two foalhoods friends meet up again and was questioning if I should ship them as a gay couple later on)
Blue Cross and Kasic finally meet again:

The sight was getting boring, the same ceiling everyday to stare at when I wasn't going through rehabilitation therapy and actual therapy for my “suicidal tendencies”.

I was getting better though, Fauna stopped by now and then bringing some of her flowers when she had the chance. Her business was going well, opened another flower shop this week, but I haven't asked if it's location.

Although having nothing to do, listening to music helped me get by when I wasn't busy. Besides my nurse trying to hold conversations with me never actually got anywhere, so she had asked for a transfer because I must've been “too boring” for her. Which must've explained why said nurse wasn't here.

Letting out a sigh, I pulled out my earbuds and paused the music from my iPone, I then sat up right to lean over the edge of the bed to look for my laptop to work on my story. But I didn't find the saddlebag where it was stored.

“Where is it?” I thought to myself angrily, frustrated on not being able to find it when I looked all around the bed. But it was at that point where a conversation outside the room peaked my interest.

“Hi, I am the new nurse for a… Mr Kasic.” A voice spoke, probably to the desk mare.

“He’s right in there. I'm sure you have been briefed on the condition and situation he's in, yes?” The desk mare asked.

“Yes I have, the name sounded familiar to me so when the original nurse stepped down, I took the spot.” The voice explained.

“Alright, he doesn't talk much from what I heard so don't say you haven't been warned if you get bored.”

“Understood, I have a feeling I won't though. Thank you and have a wonderful day.” The voice finished, the sound of giggling from the desk mare followed.

A pair of hoof steps then became closer and louder as I stared at the doorway to see my new nurse. “Alright Mr…” He stopped half way through the doorway when he looked up from his clipboard held in his magic, mouth agape when he saw me. I can't say I didn't do the same.

“Kas?”

“Blue?”

We say to each other at the same time, surprised to see each other after so long.

Blue, or Blue Cross, had been my best friend when we were foals living in Neighbraska. Blue and me were practically brothers, but we lost contact with each other after we both got our cutie marks. Him studying abroad pursuing nursing as I stayed in the area working as an editorial for a local news.

What's worse is he also knows of my condition, and got his cutie mark by helping nursing me back to stable condition. I owe him more than I'd like to know, and he knows it too.

“I… I didn't expect to… oh Celestia, Kasic I'm sorry.” Blue began as he fell to his haunches, a hoof over his muzzle as he stared wide eyed at me.

There it was again, that pain of guilt eating at me. My foalhood friend seeing me once again at my lowest, I didn't like it. “Expect to see me like this? It's ok, not your fault, Blue.” I say in a defeated tone, motioning with a hoof for him to come.

Blue did as I wished and I pulled him into a hug, resting my head along his shoulder. I could feel him return the hug as he then rubbed a hoof comfortingly up and down my back.

“It's been too long, Kas…”

“It has… I'm glad to see you again.” I respond, then feeling Blue tighten the hug as he took in a deep breath.

“Same here… Same here.”

After being like that for a long while, I finally let go and gently push Blue off. “Hey Blue, Can you help me find my laptop?” I ask, going back to looking around the bed to find it. “I had my bag besides the bed when I used it last night, now I can’t find it.”

“Sure thing.” He then checks under the bed for me, only find nothing. I watch as he walks around the room, ducking down and searching high to find it.

I feel worse because I can't really get up and around, my attempt of suicide making me weak. But Blue finally found my saddlebag and levitated it towards me. “Here you go, Kas. Say what do you need it for?” Blue asks as he then sat down next to the bed as I pulled out and opened up my laptop.

“I'm working on a book…” I say, concentrating on my newest task, opening up document the draft was typed on. “The first draft wasn't accepted by the publisher so I'm rewriting from scratch.”

“Still working on being an author?” Blue asks, looking over at my laptop and reads what I had so far. “What’s this book of yours about?” I feel blue lean closer to me, probably to get a better view.

“Well it was about a soldier who was injured on the field of battle and he gets left behind in the rush of retreat. But he manages to survive with the help of some locals who take him in. All the while the enemy army finds out he's still there, thus forcing him to escape back to his country and home.” I say quickly, immediately typing where I left off.

“What's it called?”

“The Retreat.” I answer, suddenly having my laptop ripped from my grasp by Blue’s magic. Turning to look at him in anger, I see him searching up the title.

“You need to see this.” He says, turning the laptop back towards me.

I then began to read the page, my eyes widening as I read what it said. “‘The Retreat has become a bestseller from the author Dontavious, gaining popularity from its gut wrenching action and suspenseful scenes.’ What the fuck!” I yell out in rage. “That's my book!”

I see Blue Cross wince, his ears flattening as my anger boiled. I quickly pick up my laptop with my hooves and threw it across the room, never wanting to see it again. But not as expected the laptop was caught in a dark blue aura and was levitated back gently.

“You don't need to throw things, Kas. Do you still have the original copy of it? You can still sue for plagiarizing.” He quickly inputs, trying to calm me down.

I get up, trying to leave but I'm held back by Blue. “Let me go, Blue. I need to go.”

“Kasic no you don't. Don't make me do something l’lI regret. C’mon, just sit back down and we can figure this out.”

I try to push him out of the way, but I wasn't as strong as I was before I went to the hospital. But it doesn't stop me, the fact of being cheated like that threw me into fury and I wanted to get back at the one who stole from me.

“Kas, don't do this.” I hear Blue say, but I only grunt in response.

Apparently some other ponies heard the commotion because I saw a couple of ponies peering in to see what was going on. I was going to close the door on them, but my concentration of mana was thrown off as Blue lifted me up and threw me back on the hospital bed and then pinned down with his magic.

“Blue let me go!” I yell in frustration.

“I can't do that, just calm down Kas! This is your final warning!”

I continued to struggle, which I guess is what caused Blue’s magic to falter when watching me hopelessly trying to succeed. Once free from his grasp I stood up to attempt to jump over him, but he quickly recovered from his moment of pity and fired a beam at me, in which I immediately passed out right after landing hard on the floor behind him.

“What is it huh? Think you're better than us because you're a unicorn? Well this will show when you to try to mess with pegisi!”

I thrashed about being carried up into the sky by three pegisi bullies. Tears streamed down my face as the ground grew distant as I got higher, being able to see above the tree line and part of the next town over. “No! Please don't! Just let me go!” I screamed as loud as I could, hoping an adult heard my cries of fear.

“You asked for it.”

That was all I heard before I dropped from the sky, the wind rushing past my ears as I neared the ground. I tried to perform a cloudwalking spell so I could land on one of the clouds, but fear kept me at bay. I closed my eyes as I got closer to the surface, waiting for my end to come and the eternal silence that came with it.

Splash

My eyes snapped open to that same view again, the hospital tile ceiling. I could here a conversation going just outside my room, turning my ears to listen in.

“I understand Nurse Blue Cross, but it's not alright if a patient gets aggressive like that. You made the right choice in sedating him but it's your choice to leave his care to somepony else if you don't feel safe.”

“I'll be fine, Doctor.