Scootaloo vs Chrysalis

by Thought Prism

First published

Scootaloo is attacked by Queen Chrysalis. It ends poorly... for Chrysalis.

Scootaloo is attacked by Queen Chrysalis. It ends poorly... for Chrysalis.

This is a blatant crackfic; I regret nothing.

No, Really

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Scootaloo was having a fine Saturday morning. Currently, she was in the middle of practicing on her scooter, getting sweet air like nopony's business. The small skate park Scootaloo occupied was on the edge of town, and there weren't any other foals around. She was fine with that: it meant fewer distractions, as well as fewer opportunities for a painful collision.

She dove once more down the concrete ramp, building up speed. Once she cleared the top, she spun, keeping hold of the handlebars while kicking the board around in a circle. Her landing was, for once, flawless, and Scootaloo whooped with joy as she zoomed down the ramp once more. This was the life, she thought, nothing but the wind in her mane and the four wheels at her hooves. At least, until she heard the sound of hooves crunching on dry grass.

When she skidded to a stop and turned to look at the large shadow which had crept up in her peripheral vision, her eyes immediately widened in shock at the newcomer. Rather than the smiling face of a curious passerby, Scootaloo was now face-to-face with the cruel sneer of the terrible Queen Chrysalis. She recognized the invading tyrant from the papers. Before she had a chance to scream, a green aura clamped her mouth shut and rooted her in place, her scooter skidding out from underneath her flailing hooves.

"Ah, yes, this one will do nicely," Chrysalis said after much scrutinizing. "Surely that Starlight Glimmer will not suspect that this feeble example of her species is actually out for her hide. That this filly was not her usual self, rather: it was me, Chrysalis!" She then paused from her musing to laugh gleefully at her own brilliance. "Moreover, it should be easy recharging my love reserves through pity."

Continuing to cackle madly, Chrysalis stepped closer to Scootaloo, the filly shaking with fear as Chrysalis' razor-sharp horn neared. Her slitted eyes narrowed as she switched the spell she was casting to her trademark mind control spell, which worked on even the most stalwart of ponies, guaranteed or your money backTM.

But as the spell penetrated into Scootaloo's mind, her body responded with a reflex long since dormant. One that she had been conditioned to exhibit in years long past as her last line of defense against any and all manner of mortal peril. She flapped her wings, lifted her head, and cried out.

"BaCAAAW!"

Chrysalis stared in confusion at the odd display. When her spell finished its job without further ceremony, leaving Scootaloo as a stationary husk, she shrugged. "That was weird. Oh well, time to go throw this pony in a ditch somewhere a ways off. I've got sweet vengeance to wreak!"

She only got three steps before everything went to Tartarus.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a mass of angry chickens appeared. They surrounded Chrysalis at once, pecking, clawing and diving at her chitin from all directions without mercy as their high pitched calls assaulted her ears.

Chrysalis screamed in pain and surprise. First, she tried galloping away from the feathery horde, but when that didn't work, she began flinging them off of herself one by one with her hooves and magic. However, that effort proved fruitless as well. She didn't even have enough wingroom to fly off; each of her desperate flaps was intercepted by a clucking menace.

"Confound these wretched fowl!" she exclaimed. "For every one I fling away, a dozen more vex me!"

This was indeed a true statement. No matter how many she blasted away, Chrysalis was constantly surrounded by the sea of beaks and talons. Soon, cracks began to appear all across her body from the unending onslaught of raging poultry. Her energy, too, was ebbing fast.

Chrysalis tilted her head to the heavens as best she could, given that she was covered in writhing chickens. "Is this how it all ends?" she asked. "The mighty Queen Chrysalis, having escaped the fall of her kingdom only to be felled by the most pathetic of farm animals?"

Fate had no reply, except to send even more chickens. They were plucking at her face now.

Her long life flashed before her eyes, with all its successes and failings. She never suspected it would end this way, after all the centuries she had endured. With her last breath, she cursed the orange cripple who had brought her low. Chrysalis' only regret was that she hadn't become the supreme ruler of the planet.

* * *

When Scootaloo awoke, it was with a terrible headache. She rubbed her forehead and winced. "Oww... What happened? Did I crash into Derpy again?"

The voice who replied was not the one she had expected. "No, Scootaloo, you ran into Queen Chrysalis," said Twilight Sparkle.

Scootaloo opened her eyes in surprise. She was surrounded by wide-eyed townsponies, and half of them were staring at her. The other half were staring the limp corpse of Queen Chrysalis.

Scootaloo's jaw dropped. "What happened to her?"

"I was going to ask you that," replied Twilight. "We heard somepony screaming, so we rushed over, only to find her deceased and you unconscious."

Suddenly, all was revealed. "Ok, yeah, I think I know what happened," Scootaloo said. "I must have been in danger and called my family."

Twilight blinked. "Your family? But, they just got here." She then gestured to the pair of pegasi in question, who were busy gawking at Chrysalis.

"No, like, from before I was adopted," she clarified.

Twilight blinked again.

"Did I never tell you I was raised by mutant Everfree chickens?" Scootaloo asked.

"Uh, I think I would have remembered that," she said. "Also, what?"

Scootaloo nodded. "It's true. I guess it just didn't come up in conversation."

It took a minute for that to sink in. "You know what, sure. Just... come help me track them down? I feel like I should award those chickens for their bravery."

She grinned at that. "Oh, that's easy, gimme a sec." Scootaloo then inhaled deeply and...

"BaCAAAW!"