A Gummy for Your Thoughts

by Spirit Derpy

First published

I don’t know what this is. I’m not even sure if you can call it a story. Something very strange happened in the middle of it. I think that the moral of this story is that you should never let your characters become self-aware.

This story was one of the weirdest that I’ve ever written. It did not go as planned, but I suppose that’s to be expected when you put Pinkie in your story. Although, I’m not sure that you can actually call this a story. I just don’t know what went wrong.

A Gummy for Your Thaughts

View Online

Gummy sat on the counter and watched as Pinkie used a spoon to stir a bowl full of cake batter. The batter smelled different to Gummy. It seemed that Pinkie was trying out a new recipe. He wondered if it would be better than the last cake she made.

Pinkie set the bowl down on the counter and added some more ingredients. “This is going to be so delicious. Huh, what was that Gummy? You want to lick the batter off the spoon?” Pinkie asked.

Gummy blinked in response. She always insisted that he try some of the batter. It didn’t really matter to him if the batter tasted good or bad. His life would not change because of something as simple as the taste of cake batter. Sometimes he wished he could see life the way Pinkie did.

Pinkie was pleased by the simplest of things. Her optimism sure was something to behold. Very few things could ever displease her. At least she would always have a fun time. Gummy envied her for that.

“Of course you can lick the spoon. I guarantee that you’ll like it,” Pinkie said as she put the batter covered spoon in front of Gummy’s face.

Gummy sighed internally as he stared at the spoon. He didn’t really care to lick the spoon, but he knew that Pinkie wouldn’t remove the spoon until he had tried it. Reluctantly he extended his tongue and ran it across the spoon.

“It’s good isn’t it,” Pinkie said as she put the empty spoon in the sink.

The batter was objectively one of the best that she had ever made. It would’ve surely impressed anypony. The taste didn’t have an effect on Gummy though. His view on reality still remained the same. Existence was still boring to him because he knew that the outcome of life really didn’t matter in the end.

Pinkie picked up the bowl and poured it into a cake pan. Then she placed the cake pan in the oven and closed the door. She turned on a kitchen timer and placed it on top of the stove. Pinkie looked back at Gummy and said, “Maud is sure to love this cake. I can’t wait until she gets here. What about you Gummy? I bet you can’t wait to see Maud either. The two of you get along so well.”

Gummy looked at Pinkie with blank eyes. He did not understand how Maud and Pinkie could be related.. Their views on reality were so different that they shouldn’t get along, but they did anyway. Pinkie was right though, out of all of the ponies in the world, Maud was by far one of the most interesting to him. He was excited to hear that she was going to be coming to visit.

Pinkie put the mixing bowl in the sink and said, “Now It’s time to make the rock candy.” Then she began to move about the kitchen to gather everything that she needed.

Gummy turned his head every so often to follow Pinkies movement’s. It always fascinated him that she could make everything so fast. Pinkie had a lot of unique skills. No matter how hard Gummy tried, he could never figure out where she learned all of her skills from. He supposed that that was probably a good thing.

Pinkie looked at Gummy and smiled. “Gummy I’m surprised by you. You’re usually so smart. I would’ve thought that you would have figured all of that out by now. It’s not like I’m keeping anything secret. I mean the answers are right in front of you. Their written in plain english. All you have to do is read them,” she said.

Gummy blinked lazily as he stared at Pinkie. This was one of the things that really confused Gummy. Pinkie always seemed to be seeing more of reality than what was really there. The only conclusion that he could come to was that she was just messing with him.

Pinkie tilted her head and stared at Gummy with a look of bewilderment on her face. “How could you ever think that Gummy. I would never try and mess with you. It’s really not that complicated Gummy. It’s all right there on the page. Just take a look if you want to know. If you can’t see what I’m talking about then I guess you aren’t looking hard enough,” Pinkie said.

Gummy slowly extended his tongue and licked his eyes again. This was exactly the problem. Pinkie always seemed to know so much more than she let on. It almost seemed like she could predict the future.

“I can’t predict the future silly. No one can predict the future. All I’m doing is reading a little bit ahead,” Pinkie said. A second later she pulled a bucket of multi colored rock candy out of a cabinet and set in on the table.

This surprised gummy a little bit. Pinkie had only started to make that rock candy a minute ago. It shouldn’t have been done yet. How had Pinkie finished it so fast?

“I didn’t make it that fast. We just skipped over that part of the story Gummy. It would’ve been too boring to hear about me making rock candy. Besides, Maud is about to arrive anyway, so I need to have everything ready before she gets here,” Pinkie said as the kitchen timer went off. “Oh, the cake’s done.”

Pinkie pulled the cake out of the oven and set the pan down on the table. Somehow the cake was already fully decorated with frosting. This time Gummy didn’t question how Pinkie had done it so fast. He had decided that it wasn’t worth the headache to try and figure it out.

“You sure are silly Gummy, but that just makes life all the more interesting. I’m so glad that you like to hang out with me. You make things so much better,” Pinkie said.

A minute later there was a knock at the door. “Oh, that must be Maud. I’ll be right back Gummy,” Pinkie said as she walked out of the kitchen.

Gummy just stared blankly at the wall. He didn’t even move when Maud and Pinkie walked into the room.

“You’re going to love the cake that made I for you. Gummy thought that it was one of the best that I’ve ever made. You should’ve seen the look on his face when he tasted it,” Pinkie said as she started to cut up the cake.

Maud pulled Boulder out of her pocket and placed him on the table in front of Gummy. “Play nice,” she said.

Gummy chuckled as he stared blankly at Boulder. Maud’s attachment to Boulder always amused him. The two of them made for interesting friends. Boulder was an immovable object that held very little in the way of emotions. Maud on the other hoof, had a lot of emotions even though she rarely shared them with anypony. For those reasons, Gummy really enjoyed their company.

Pinkie smiled as she looked at Gummy. “Aw, Gummy, you always say the sweetest things,” Pinkie said. Then she put four plates with cake on them. “Go ahead and try some. There’s enough for everypony.”

Gummy looked at the cake in front of him and sighed internally. He extended his tongue and licked some of the frosting off. The cake tasted perfect. As Gummy took another lick of the cake he noticed that the cake in front of Boulder had disappeared. For a moment, he tried to figure out where It went. He gave up though, when he realized that he should never question Pinkie or Maud. Strange things always happened around them. It was to be expected.

Pinkie smiled and said, “See, this was such a great idea. Sometimes you just need to do something fun. Even If it doesn’t make any sense. I suppose that it’s going to end soon, though. There isn’t much left in this story. I guess that the author ran out of ideas.”

Maud gave Pinkie a blank stare as she asked, “What are talking about Pinkie?”

“I’m talking about the author silly,” Pinkie said.

“What author are you talking about? There’s no one else here,” Maud said.

“The author writing this weird story, of course. I think he’s just trying to find a way to end the story, though,” Pinkie said.

“Uh, Pinkie?” the author asked trying to cut Pinkie off.

“Oh, there he is now. Yes, Mr. Author? Did you want something?” Pinkie asked.

The author sighed in frustration. “Pinkie, I’m trying to write a story here. Do you really have to break the forth wall? It’s kind of annoying,” the author said in frustration.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that you didn’t want me to do that. You could have just told me,” Pinkie said.

“Ugh, never mind Just get back to the story. You’re going to make everyone really confused if you keep this up,” the author said.

“Oh, before I go, can I say goodbye to the audience?” Pinkie asked as she bounced on her hooves.

The author proceeded to bang his head on his desk. A loud bang echoed through his house. The author felt like screaming in frustration, but didn’t want to make the neighbors angry. “Really Pinkie? First you talk to me and break the story and now you want to talk directly to the audience. Fine, go ahead and write the story yourself. I’m out of here,” The author said as he angrily jumped out of his seat and walked out of his room.

Pinkie had a confused look on her face as she said, “Uh, Mr. Author? Where did you go? Are you just going to leave the story just like that? Do you expect me to be able to type the rest of this with just my hooves?”

Maud looked at her sister with a concerned look on her face. “What’s going on Pinkie?” Maud asked.

Pinkie sighed and said, “Nothing, going on anymore. We’ve reached the end of the story. Well good bye everpony.” Pinkie let a small giggle and waved to the audience.