Twilight travels to a distant land to uncover a mystery. Mostly because everyone else is too lazy to do it.
Set a few months after the events of Twilight VS Anime, Twilight is content to relax now that she has seen the appeal in the animation that she thought would once threaten Equestria's way of life and can now focus on her personal life. However, she is called back to duty once more after it has been discovered that anime was suddenly stolen from Equestria's broadcasting stations. Along with the help of her friends, Twilight travels to the birthplace of anime to uncover the identity of the thief and return anime to TV screens across the world.
Once again, Discord could have just snapped his darn fingers and...!
There are two choices to make when your door is practically torn off its hinges by a wailing pink pony carrying a bucket to contain her tears:
Option A – Ignore the pink pony.
Option B – Confront the pink pony and get involved in whatever situation she had gotten herself into, thereby repeating the same mistake from last time.
Twilight should have gone with Option A.
“Oh no…” Twilight groaned as she stood up and quickly cast a Raincoat spell on her precious books. “Pinkie, the last time you came in here crying, I had to blowdry half my books.”
“It’s horrible, Twily! Horribuh-huh-hullle!” Pinkie sobbed, making her way over to the reading table and placing her bucket on top. Mini-waterfalls cascaded down her cheeks. “Why do bad things happen to TV?”
“I don’t really watch TV that much, but…” In the corner of her eye, Twilight saw a blue form trot out from the kitchen. She turned her head and waved her hoof in warning. “Trixie, I think we need to get the mop and bucket ready. The bucket’s not that big.”
Levitating a tray of freshly-baked cookies, Trixie harrumphed and walked over to place the baked goods on the table. “The Great and Powerful Trixie was looking forward to spending time alone with her Smart and Beautiful Twilight!”
Twilight blushed, still unused to the flattery even after almost three months. “Th-thanks, Trixie…”
“Aw, y-you two are so cute together. It’s too bad that the whole world is ending!!”
“Okay, Pinkie. Pinkie. Stop. Stop crying all over the cookies. No, don’t try to use that book as a handkerchief. Put that down. Good. Now, tell me what’s going on.”
Pinkie took several deep breaths and managed to quell the flow of tears. “Well… there I was… helping the Cakes cook… but the twins were being fussy… so I decided to turn the TV on for them. I put them… in the living room and… and turned the TV on, but… but…”
Seeing that she was about to cry again, Twilight touched her – soggy – foreleg. “It’s alright, Pinkie. What happened?”
Pinkie sniffled, her eyes growing wide. “Twilight… it’s gone.”
“What is?”
“The anime!!”
“… What?”
“The anime is gone, Twilight!” Pinkie grabbed her shoulders and shook her hysterically. “Somepony has stolen all of the anime!”
Pinkie buried her face into Twilight’s chest and sobbed uncontrollably, her frail heart unable to handle the tragedy.
She still snuck cookies in between her sobs, though.
Twilight craned her neck and shot Trixie a bewildered look while moving her lips. “How could someone steal a TV genre?”
Trixie shrugged and mouthed back, “Trixie cannot read lips.”
Twilight blinked. “But… you just…”
“Twilight, we have to rescue the anime!” Pinkie looked up at her imploringly. “For the good of all Equestria!”
“Pinkie, don’t you think that may be an exaggeration?” Twilight lightly pushed her off and used her magic to grab a nearby box of tissues. She took out several tissues and wiped down her chest, grimacing at the matted fur. “I haven’t followed up much on the anime genre since our adventure to Canterlot, but I’m pretty sure that Equestria’s stability doesn’t hinge on its existence. Or even its popularity.”
“But it’s stolen, Twilight!” Pinkie cried. “What dastardly deviant can steal an entire genre?”
“Okay, that might be a concern if I wasn’t ninety percent sure that I already knew who the culprit might be.”
“Why, I am offended that you would jump to suspect me so swiftly.”
Two bulging eyes popped out of the tissue box. It might have been surprising several months ago, but Twilight had grown accustomed to such antics. Mostly.
“Can you blame me?” Twilight responded with an unimpressed glare. “Discord, what are you playing at now?”
“Alas, this time, it really isn’t me,” Discord emerged from the tissue box and hovered in mid-air lackadaisically. “I love anime. Even I’m not cruel enough to deprive ponies of its magnificence. Why, even you grew to enjoy it, didn’t you?”
“I came around to it, but I don’t know if I enjoy it as much as you might,” Twilight placed the box down and sat back down at the table to grab a cookie. “I watch it with Trixie from time to time, but I don’t consider myself a real fan.”
“Napkin, Twily,” Trixie clucked her tongue as she tied a napkin around Twilight’s neck. “You’re terrible when it comes to crumbs.”
“Thanks. Anyway, if it’s such a big deal, then I’m sure you can just snap your claws and bring it back.”
“Oh, I could, but where’s the fun in that?” Discord slithered over to an empty space and stretched until he was full size, coiled like some unusually excited slinky. “This is a task suited for you and your friends!”
“What? No, it’s not,” Twilight shook her head; clearly, Discord was just trying to get her to do something that would take her away from her precious books. “This is a job for the technicians at Canterlot’s network station.”
“Err… perhaps,” Discord swiftly snapped his talons. “However, I fear that they’ve been immobilized by some dastardly villain and are unable to help. So, while you go investigate who might have stolen the anime, I’ll track down this dashing rogue.”
“Discord…”
“We’re going to save the anime?” Pinkie cried, hope in her watery eyes.
“Pinkie, just calm down for a second? Look, Discord – I’ll admit that what happened last time was hardly the worst thing to happen to Equestria. And yes, I enjoyed it at the end,” Briefly, she grinned deviously. “Especially when I got back at everyone. Even so, this is all very sudden and it’s not like it’s the end of the world. Besides, I’m sure this will be resolved on its own. Maybe the signal for anime – which I’m still certain you obtained illegally – was lost due to atmospheric phenomena. Maybe it wasn’t stolen in the first place.”
Pinkie shook her head. “Oh no. It’s super stolen, Twily.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on. How can you tell that it’s stolen?”
A few minutes later…
The channel you are looking for has been stolen.
We at Canterlot’s Television Network Station will be working on the problem as soon as our technicians have been dug out from cubes of jelly. We apologize for the inconvenience.
Twilight stared at the Cakes’ TV set’s black screen and white lettering. “I don’t which baffles me more: that a channel has been stolen, or that they have a broadcast for something so specific.”
“I’m innocent of this thievery, young Twilight,” Discord lifted his paw and drew a red X on his chest. “Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my- owie!”
“Okay, I believe you. So, if it wasn’t you, then someone else must have done it. I suppose a sufficiently powerful unicorn could craft an enchanted crystal that could trap the wavelength that this specific channel uses, but they would have to-”
Buurrrp!
Spike caught the parchment before it could fall and read it aloud while waving his hand to get rid of the smoke. “Hey, a letter from Princess Celestia.”
“What…?” Twilight almost jumped out of her skin. “When did you get here?”
“O-kay, just gonna ignore that before it gets awkward. Ahem… ‘My dearest friend, Twilight Sparkle – a grave matter has come to my attention regarding a brand of animated genre known as ‘anime’, which I am sure you are familiar with given the events from only a few months ago. While we could argue day and night over whether or not it was necessary to invoke Clover the Clever’s theorems as part of I and the others’ punishment considering our roles in those events, I would rather we immediately address the issue at hoof’…” Spike frowned. “If she thinks that, then why’d she bring it up?”
Twilight shrugged. “Keep reading.”
“Hm… ‘I have received news that the anime genre has been inexplicably removed from all broadcasting stations across Equestria. Furthermore, a recent missive from the Griffon Kingdom informs me that they are experiencing similar circumstances and have been so for the past two days’.”
“The Griffon Kingdom as well?” Twilight furrowed her brow in concern and touched her lips. “This is more widespread than I thought.”
“‘The High King asks for our assistance in this dreadful time’…”
“And more serious than I thought.”
“… ‘As one Marquees is a huge fan and is being really annoying about finding out what’s going on. The High King tells me that he is a very lazy bird and does not want to do anything very strenuous on his part’.”
“Okay, it’s actually a little concerning that they have an authority figure like that.”
“‘I implore you and your friends to find the cause of this crisis. I would be happy to assist you personally, but I’m afraid my hooves are tied up here in Canterlot; it seems that Prince Blueblood’s rivalry with birds has reached the breaking point and there is now war in the streets. My sister cannot help, either, as she is sleeping and throws pillows at my face when I attempt to wake her. As you might imagine, I have no defense’…”
Twilight looked at Discord. “Are you sure you’re not doing any of this?”
“Afraid not,” Discord shrugged, sending his shoulders into the ceiling. “Odd, isn’t it? Well, I always said everypony has a little bit of chaos in them somewhere. It’s the building block of change, after all!”
“I guess. Go on, Spike.”
“Right. ‘However, I can arrange free transport to wherever your adventure takes you: simply send a letter to me providing details of your need, and I shall grant it. I wish you and your friends luck, my friend. Sincerely, Princess Celestia’.”
Spike squinted at the bottom of the parchment.
“‘P.S. If Discord is the one causing all of this, ignore everything I said and tell him to put the anime back on before I punch him’.”
“Well, I guess it’s official now,” Twilight sighed. “Anime has been stolen, and we need to find out who it is. Any ideas where to look?”
Suddenly, the lounge room couch’s cushions flew into the air as a crazy mess of pink hair popped out. Twilight yelped and jumped up to cling to the ceiling.
“Ooh, ooh! I know! We should start at the source of the anime!” Pinkie leapt out from the couch, pulled out a miniature globe from her mane, and pointed at a spot. “Right here.”
Twilight let out a shaky exhale and carefully detached from the ceiling, wincing as bits of plaster sprinkled down when she flapped her wings to descend. “If you’ll give me a second for my heart to calm down…” She sighed and looked at the globe, gently nudging Pinkie’s hoof aside. “A land mass between Equestria and the Griffon Kingdom? That could only be…”
“Neighpan!” Discord cried exuberantly. “Why, that’s where I got into anime in the first place! I remember my first visit there: so many ponies and griffons yelling at me because I replaced the sidewalks with banana peels. Good times.”
“Neighpan is the birthplace of anime, so to speak,” Twilight rubbed her chin thoughtfully. “If anybody would know anything about anime disappearing, then that’s our best shot for answers,” Nodding firmly, Twilight felt a sense of adventure swelling up in her breast and smiled as she pointed to the ceiling. “It’s settled. Go tell the girls, Pinkie – we’re going to Neighpan!”
Pinkie squealed in delight and raced outside. “Woohoo! Epic quest time!”
“Hey, Twilight, can I come this time? I don’t really have anything to do at the library.”
“Weren’t you supposed to clean that pile of shed scales?”
Spike shrugged. “I don’t really have anything I want to do at the library.”
“Fine,” Twilight rolled her eyes. “You can come. Remember to send a letter to Celestia telling her we need to get to Neighpan. And just know that the second we get back, you’re cleaning that pile.”
“Fair enough. Guess I’ll go get packing. I’ll tell Trixie, so don’t worry about it.”
“Thanks, Spike.”
Once the little dragon was out the door, Discord minimized himself and settled on Twilight’s shoulder, casually rubbing a nail filer against his claws.
“You and the braggart seem to be getting along well. Honestly, I’m a little annoyed that I lost my bet with Rainbow Dash.”
“You two bet on my relationship with Trixie?” Twilight scowled darkly and blew him off with a puff.
Discord flopped onto the carpet with nary a blink. “Oh, come now – everypony was drawing their own estimates; the difference is that Rainbow Dash and I also included material items. Namely bits. Besides, my bet was that you’d end up sending her to the moon after two weeks of ‘great and powerful this and that’, so aren’t you happy to have proven me wrong?”
“I guess. I still don’t appreciate the idea of you and my friends betting on aspects of my personal life.”
“You have to admit it’s rather quaint. You and Trixie didn’t get along at first from what I heard. The second meet-up wasn’t all butterflies and rainbows either, what with the whole ‘sealing Ponyville off in a giant dome’ shtick. Hardly something you’d forget, but not exactly the best way to start off a romantic relationship,” Discord snorted and teleported back onto her shoulder. “But what do I know? I’m just a terribly handsome draconequus stuck in the old days of chocolate rain and candy clouds.”
Twilight sighed; no use in flicking him off again. “You’re right. I didn’t think Trixie and I would get along either, but it’s been… surprisingly pleasant. We have more in common than I thought. Yeah, she still likes to boast and… sometimes it gets annoying, but according to books I’ve read about relationships, our one has all the signs of being adequate.”
“‘Good enough’ is the standard for relationships nowadays?”
“Hey, considering it’s my first, I think it’s pretty good. Anyway, what makes you an expert?”
“Have you seen this mug, Sparkle-butt? I had to beat the masses off with a stick in some parts of the world.” To emphasize his point, he held up the object in question.
“That’s not a stick, Discord. That’s a mace.”
“Well, you just have to learn to respect other creatures’ opinions.”
“It’s made of metal and it’s rusted!”
Discord tossed the subjective item away. “Whatever.”
“Look – just keep your nose out of my personal life, please?”
“Oh, very well,” Huffing, Discord snapped his talons and returned to full size. “I suppose I’ll go search for this other villain who encased those poor ponies in jelly. Hmm… I think the best place to look would be the bowling alley.”
“Try a mirror.”
“Oho, sarcasm! There’s hope for you yet!”
Twilight rolled her eyes and looked away as Discord disappeared in a burst of radiant light.
Well, if they were going to Neighpan, then she should go pack her things and get somepony to substitute as librarian. Knowing Pinkie, she would have likely informed half their friends by now of their unexpected adventure.
Twilight smiled to herself as she strode out of the Cakes’ household. “Neighpan… I haven’t been there before. Hopefully, we can get some cultural learning alongside our quest. I’ve always wanted to learn Neighpanese…”
Previously on Twilight's Unusual Escapade: Dark Requiem Revisited...
Twilight flipped the page in her book and encountered a Wild Discord pretending to be a bookmark.
“Anime’s been stolen,” He said. “I’m too lazy to find it, so go do it yourself.”
“But-”
“No, shut up. Do it.”
Spike barfed up a letter. “‘Dear Twilight Sparkle, go find the anime before I resort to unnecessary violence. With love, Princess Celestia’.”
Twilight sighed.
Episode 1
私の日本の文化に対する無知を無視してください Watashi no nihon'nobunka ni taisuru muchi o mushi shite kudasai – New Land at Sun’s Zenith
As a shut-in even at an early age, Twilight had only known Canterlot – or more specifically, the area of Canterlot around her house – and moving to Ponyville had been one of the most upheaving events of her life.
Well, then came the whole ‘Elements of Harmony’ debacle, but prior to that, moving to Ponyville was a super-freaky, upheaving thing.
She had been all over Equestria, weeding out both great and petty evils, but nothing could prepare her for travelling to another land altogether. A boat ride across the ocean – courtesy of Princess Celestia – had Twilight, her friends, and Trixie arriving at a pier where griffons in security uniforms checked their identities before waving them through a small building that functioned as a checkpoint.
“Everything seems to be in order,” The head of security hoof… handed her papers back and bowed politely. “Sayonara – goodbye, Princess Twilight. Enjoy your stay.”
And when she went through the doors, it dawned on Twilight, as she gazed around an unfamiliar environment, just how far from her roots she truly was.
‘In… incredible!’
Twilight looked up in wide-eyed astonishment at the grandiose, high-rise buildings with bedazzling neon lights and flashing signs. “Girls, have you seen anything like this?”
“Ah can’t believe mah eyes!”
“It’s spectacular, darling.”
“This is the most awesome thing I’ve ever seen!”
“It’s… nice.”
“Super-duper-uber-cooler-than-cool!”
“We’re in another land, another culture,” Twilight looked over her shoulder. “Just think of the…” Much like her faith in equinity, Twilight’s face fell. “You’re… Really?”
Twilight’s resolve was not prepared for the sight of her friends, her marefriend, and her draconic assistant gawking over a kiosk selling square watermelons.
“Oh, Faust give me strength…”
Fortunately, the exchange rate from bits to yen wasn’t too drastic, so Twilight was able to get a few watermelons to sate everyone’s strange curiosity before they ventured further into the unfamiliar city.
Much like Manehattan, the buildings were primarily stone and metal with a great bounty of shops and businesses advertising their services to the public. The signs were mostly in Neighponese, however; Twilight had to search through her trusty ‘Equestrian-to-Neighponese’ booklet to work out what they said.
“I’ve never seen so many ponies and griffons in one place before,” Rarity observed those they passed with a curious eye. “Why, before Gilda, I had never even seen a griffon.”
“Neighpan, or Montagna Bianca, has a mixed populace of both equine and avian due to a very rich history,” Twilight said. “It’s quite fascinating.”
“Hey, we came to rescue anime, not learn history,” Rainbow Dash shook her watermelon next to her ear. “Weird. Anyway, does anypony know where we should start looking?”
“Our best bet would be to stop by at the company that produces and distributes the anime genre – Gravel Animation Incorporated.”
“Oh, yeah!” Pinkie nodded with a big smile. “I see their logo in the end credits all the time.”
Twilight stopped at the corner of the sidewalk and looked around. “Hm… I don’t see any street signs. Spike…” From her bag, she took out a map and levitated it backwards. “Could you tell us how to get to the northern-west part of the city? That’s where the company is if I’m not mistaken.”
“Sure thing,” Spike took the map and folded it out. “… Okay, it looks like we take a right here and cross into… uh… Ah… Akeemigh?” He frowned and showed the map to Pinkie. “What does that say?”
“Akemi,” Pinkie rubbed her chin thoughtfully. “It means ‘beautiful dawn’, if I remember correctly. And I do!”
Twilight’s head lifted. “You know what?” She closed her book and put it back into her bag. “Pinkie, maybe you should handle the translations.”
“Okie-dokie-lokie!”
Twilight nodded to a griffon that was just about to pass by. “And you can start by asking if she’s seen anything weird lately.”
Pinkie giggled and bounced ahead before stopping in front of the griffon, who slowed and narrowed her eyes at the suspicious amount of pink and joy. “Konnichi wa. Hajememashite.”
“Hajememashite…”
“Ah… Watashinonamaeha Pinkie Pie. Anata wa saikin, kimyōna koto o mita koto ga arimasu ka?”
“Ano… Anmari.”
Twilight watched them exchange words for a bit before looking back at her friends. “Can any of you speak Neighpanese?”
“I can…” Rainbow Dash said. “But only if they’re words that I can shout at the top of my lungs.”
“I feel like that wouldn’t make sense even if I ask,” She heard Pinkie Pie’s bounces and turned back to her. “What did she say?”
“She said that she hasn’t seen anything strange lately. Gave me a weird look when I asked if the anime was still here-”
Twilight felt somepony lean in to her ear. “Trixie thinks that’s not uncommon.”
“-but she says it is. Looks like that dastardly villain hasn’t struck here yet,” Pinkie Pie scratched her head. “Which is kinda…”
“Weird?” Twilight nodded. “Yeah, it is. I’d have thought Neighpan would be the first to feel this. Hm. Well, we’d better get moving. Pinkie, can you take us to Gravel Animation Inc.?”
As the group followed the bubbly pink pony, a figure emerged from an alleyway behind them and watched from beneath the shadow of their hood.
Later…
“So, Pinkie…” Applejack began as they turned into Akemi Street. “Ya’ll seem pretty knowledgeable about tha’ Neighponese stuff.”
“Well, I watch a lot of anime,” Pinkie giggled, looking over her shoulder. “Plus, I’ve got a pretty good memory.”
“Ah believe tha’,” Applejack nodded. “Ta be honest, ah sort of jes’ fell out with all tha’ anime stuff. It was fun fer a while, but then it jes’ lost th’ appeal.”
“That’s understandable, darling,” Rarity said. “I feel the same way.”
“What?” Rainbow Dash cried. “Anime’s still awesome!” She turned to Fluttershy. “Right?” Fluttershy blinked and gave an ambiguous murmur with an apologetic smile. Rainbow Dash snorted and rolled her eyes. “Well, I guess it’s not for everyone in the long-term. Don’t know how anypony could get tired of all that action, though.”
“It’s not that I don’t like it anymore…” Fluttershy said with a small shrug. “But I’m not as interested as I was at the start. Discord watches it a lot, though. He’s started bringing home some stuff from the shows he really likes.”
Rarity clucked her tongue in disapproval. “Darling, he isn’t cluttering your living space, is he? You must put your hoof down with him about that.”
Fluttershy gave an unsure grimace and turned to the front of the group for a distraction. “Wh-what about you three?”
“Not really into it,” Spike shrugged. “There’s one show about magical dragonesses named after planets that seems cool, but I didn’t catch the name.”
“Solar Brimstone.”
“Yeah, that. Thanks, Pinkie.”
A stallion in a maroon cloak walking in the other direction passed them, offering a courteous nod which Twilight politely returned.
“Trixie will likely never tire of it,” Trixie said. “She enjoys the shows with colourful characters and visuals; it reminds Trixie of her own performances.”
“There are some shows I don’t mind watching,” Twilight said. “But I don’t think I’ll be-”
“H-hey!” Spike’s shout made Twilight jump and almost trip over her hooves. She barely managed to save the contents of her bag. “The map’s gone!”
“What?” Twilight looked over her assistant’s shoulder. “What do you mean the…” Her face fell. “Oh.”
The map was gone.
To be precise, the illustrations and words that made a map a map were missing. Now, it was just a piece of paper. It must have been so lonely.
“Someone stole the map?” Rainbow Dash cried. “What lame pony steals a map?”
“This pony!”
“I said ‘lame pony’.”
“W-well… you shut up!”
“Great comeback.”
Twilight saw the pony that they had just passed standing few yards away. He had opened his maroon cloak more, so that now they could see silver bangles on his forelegs and two streaks of black paint running horizontally beneath his azure eyes. He didn’t look all that scary, but then neither did parasprites. Twilight parted her lips to greet him, maybe figure out how and why he ‘stole’ their map, but he spoke before her.
“I am Watcher, the Right Eye of the Syndicate!” Watcher boasted with a dramatic flourish of his cloak. Ugh, Twilight was getting flashbacks. “I know why you’re all here and I will put a stop to your interference here and now! You have five minutes to turn around and get on another boat back to Equestria, or I shall unleash my power!”
Pinkie turned to Twilight. “Ooh, that’s an anime villain if I ever heard one!”
“Sounds like a Saturday morning cartoon villain to me.”
“Eh, it’s pretty interchangeable,” Pinkie waved her hoof dismissively. “But this is good: if we ask the right questions, he’ll probably tell us everything. Bad guys love doing that.”
“Ha, as if I’d tell you anything about the Syndicate,” Watcher laughed loudly, drawing some strange looks from bystanders who then wisely left the scene. ‘Crazy’ tended to interfere with one’s timetable. “Once we’ve stolen all the anime from Neighpan, the next stage of our plan can proceed.”
“See?” Pinkie gestured to the stallion. “So, they’re planning to do something with the anime once they have all of it.”
“Huh…” Twilight nodded in surprise. “You’re right.”
“What? Agh!” Watcher slapped himself across the cheek and snorted. “Idiot! Forget talking, then! You have four minutes to get back on a boat now, fools!”
“This guy’s name-calling is going against what friendship is all about!” Rainbow Dash clapped her forehooves together with a dark scowl. “Can I beat him up until he starts crying?”
“This is why I don’t want you teaching friendship at the schools,” Twilight sighed. “But… last time the only way we could progress was to fight, so I guess that’s the best solution in this scenario.”
“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash cried and stormed over to Watcher with a mighty beat of her wings. “Violence is the answer!”
Watcher, clearly faster than he looked, dodged Rainbow Dash’s charge and pushed out one forehoof when she passed. “Stando power – activate!!”
A sudden flash of lime-green light forced Twilight to cover her eyes. Judging by the startled sounds behind her, everypony else was similarly affected. When she looked back after the spots had cleared from her vision, she was alarmed to see Rainbow Dash lying prone on the ground, groaning.
“Rainbow Dash!” She lit her horn and flared her wings in reflex. “What did you…?” Twilight trailed off and pulled back; there was something behind Watcher. “That looks like-”
Pinkie laughed in delight and clapped her hooves. “He has a Stand! This is just like Lulu’s Very Interesting Quest!”
Twilight assumed that was an anime, but she had never heard of it. Whatever it was, ‘Stands’ must have been a big part of it based on Pinkie’s reaction. If she had to take a guess, the Stand was the green and slightly transparent apparition that floated behind Watcher; it had the upper body of a minotaur and a stereotypical ‘ghost tail’ that was linked to Watcher’s back.
“You’ve made a very poor decision in attacking me,” Watcher boasted with a sinister chuckle. Rainbow Dash was still shaking off her dizziness, and he pointed towards her. “Behold the power of my Stand – [Daze Emerald]!”
[Daze Emerald] snorted and flicked his thumb across his snout. There was a silver band covering its eyes and chains criss-crossing his bare chest.
“I… can’t fly…” Rainbow Dash looked back at her wings as they twitched and spasmed randomly. “I… I forgot how to!”
“That is the power of [Daze Emerald],” Watcher cackled. “He can steal any form of information, be it the illustrations of a map, or the know-how to fly in a pegasus’ brain.”
“Well, that sucks.”
Twilight felt a tap on her shoulder and turned to face Trixie. “Uh, yeah?”
“That must be how he stole our map,” Trixie said, jerking her head in Watcher’s direction. “Stands have an array of powers that their user can call on. Trixie enjoys the creative use of Stand powers when she watches Lulu’s Very Interesting Quest.”
Twilight nodded. “So, do you know how to defeat them?”
“Nothing special – damage to Stands is reflected on the users and vice versa,” Trixie swept her mane back in a very Rarity-like gesture and stepped forwards, brimming with confidence. “Fear not, Twily – the Great and Powerful Trixie shall take it from here.”
“I wasn’t really afraid, but if you’re sure…”
Trixie strode onto the battlefield without a trace of caution or fear. “Trixie shall vanquish this foe, so lick your wounds, useless pegasus, and allow a star to shine!”
Rainbow Dash grumbled as she got to her feet and stomped off. “I’ll give you something to shine. My butt, in case you’re wondering.”
“It’s a nice butt, but Trixie already has Twily,” Trixie swept her mane back once more before striking a dramatic pose. “Now, it’s just you and I.”
Watcher cackled villainously, and [Daze Emerald] crossed his arms even more fiercely. “What hope do you have? A Standless mare against one such as I? You must be foolishly brave, or laughably stupid.”
“So, it would be an even bigger embarrassment to you once I leave you grovelling in the dirt, hm?” Trixie fished a small black pellet from nowhere in particular and reared up on her hind legs. “You’ve shown me your Stand, so let Trixie show you hers!”
With a sweep of her hoof, the pellet ruptured against the hard pavement and enveloped her in a thick white smoke cloud.
“I see,” Watcher prepared himself as the cloud slowly dispersed. “Since you are revealing your Stand, I am forbidden to attack until you are ready.”
“Oh yeah, I always wondered why that was so common in anime,” Twilight scratched her chin, thinking. “I always assumed it was just taking place in a pocket space where time flows faster than those outside of it.”
“Hey, stop trying to science our anime!” Rainbow Dash shook her hoof. “Don’t make me punch Applejack.”
“Th’ heck did ah do?”
When the smoke cleared, a transparent apparition was hovering behind Trixie.
“Is that a hat?” Watcher quipped.
“Behold the Great and Powerful Trixie’s Stand…” Trixie reared up on her hindlegs and spread her forelegs dramatically. “[Violet Crescendo]!”
[Violet Crescendo] was little more than a purple magician’s hat floating atop a cloak of the same colour but with a white star pattern. Despite lacking a body, the interior of the cloak was like a void that swallowed light and left only a menacing darkness. [Violet Crescendo] gracefully floated in the air, wrapping around Trixie like a pet boa constrictor.
“[Violet Crescendo] has a flair for showponyship just like Trixie,” Trixie said as she went back on all fours and stroked her Stand’s hat affectionately. “She can manipulate light and create some dazzling shows because of it.”
“Ha!” Watcher scoffed. “Theatrics won’t do anything to save you against the might of [Daze Emerald]!”
“We’ll see about that,” Trixie flipped her mane back again and pointed towards Watcher. “[Violet Crescendo] – show him what you have.”
[Violet Crescendo] flew forwards with undulating motions of its cape, leaving behind a trail of rainbow pixels and white lights.
“Trixie will bet that you can’t steal the information from a Stand. Everything they know is because of the bond shared with their master,” Trixie grinned victoriously. “Unless you attack the source, [Violet Crescendo] will continue receiving information to replace whatever you try to steal.”
Watcher sneered. “Don’t get cocky just because you figured that out. Information-gathering is not the only thing [Emerald Daze] can do,” As soon as he finished, [Emerald Daze] moved in front of him and spread his arms out. “Behold!”
[Violet Crescendo] and [Emerald Daze] clashed with a burst of violet light; [Violet Crescendo] curled around her opponent’s bicep and waist and pulled hard.
“Ngh!” Watcher clutched at his chest as his breathing grew heavy and strained. “Y-you have made a mistake, fool! [Emerald Daze] is much stronger than your pitiful Stand!”
[Emerald Daze] snorted and threw a punch that [Violet Crescendo] avoided, but then the green apparition grabbed her hat and gave a vicious yank, stretching her out like a wet towel.
Trixie’s muscles grew taut and she suppressed a pained cry. “S-such strength! [Violet Crescendo] – Flashing Twirl!”
[Violet Crescendo] spun like a tornado full of ballerina cows and emitted a powerful flash of white light. Watcher grunted and looked away, the loss in concentration causing [Emerald Daze] to loosen his grip and allow [Violet Crescendo] to slip out and fly back over to Trixie.
“Your Stand is clearly weaker than mine,” Watcher rubbed his chest, but smirked confidently as he started moving closer. “If [Emerald Daze] doesn’t erase the information of how to use your Stand, then he will beat you into paste!”
“That’s what you think,” Trixie rolled her neck languidly. “But Trixie has discovered the weakness of your Stand. He can only steal information from those who are very close to you. Am I right?”
Watcher sneered. “Good eye. But that’s not going to help you win this fight.”
“No, but this will. [Violet Crescendo] – Flashing Twirl!”
Watcher closed his eyes and had [Emerald Daze] shield him from any assault. But nothing came and when he couldn’t see the light through his lids, he opened his eyes.
Trixie was gone, but there was an open sewer entrance in the street.
“Hmph! Trying to launch some attack from underground? Foolish,” Watcher approached the entrance cautiously and had [Emerald Daze] squeeze through first. Fortunately, Stands were boneless. “In such an enclosed space, you have little space to run, and your Stand emits light, so it’s not as if you can hide.”
[Emerald Daze] entered the sewers without any confrontation, so Watcher had him float by, ready to catch him when he jumped down.
Watcher did so.
And was caught halfway there.
Choking in surprise, he craned his head to look behind and saw a length of fabric coiled around his hindleg. “N-Nani?!”
The fabric pulled sharply and Watcher flew back out the entrance and into the air so fast that he didn’t know which way was up.
“No! How did she…?!”
For a moment, his body turned in just the right way for him to see Trixie and her Stand on the ground, looking up at him with a dangerous smirk.
“You really aren’t smart, huh?” Trixie tapped the side of her muzzle. “Trixie’s Stand can control light. When you looked away from [Violet Crescendo’s] Flashing Twirl, Trixie simply moved the cover to the sewer entrance aside, and then had her Stand manipulate the light so we both turned invisible. And now, while you’re disoriented…”
[Violet Crescendo] pulled herself towards Watcher and ensnared him tightly before slamming him against the ground hard enough to crater.
Watcher
Stand Name: [Emerald Daze]
Status: Can no longer Fight – Retired
“What a shame you couldn’t compare to the potential of your Stand,” Trixie snorted and called [Violet Crescendo] back. “Ah well – not everypony can be as great and powerful as Trixie.”
“You go, Trixie!” Pinkie cheered, waving a small purple flag. “That was exactly like a Lulu battle, right down to the posing!”
Amidst the polite applause everypony gave her, Trixie huffed and extended her foreleg with a haughty turn of her head. “Please, the only praise Trixie will accept is that from her precious Twily.”
Blushing, Twilight laughed awkwardly. “Um… I’m impressed that you could refract the light around you to achieve almost complete invisibility. I say ‘almost’ because I assume you had to leave your pupils unaffected in order to see. I’m… amazed that you resolved this fight using your wits instead of your strength. From what I saw from last time, the pony who yelled the loudest and had the biggest attack was most likely to be the winner.”
“Trixie heard ‘impressed’ and ‘amazed’, so she is victorious!” She pumped her hoof. “Success!”
“We ain’t done with this varmint yet,” Applejack said, walking over to Watcher. He was dazed and woozy, but still conscious. She grabbed him by the scruff of his coat and pulled him up. “Ya’ll were talkin’ ‘bout something called a ‘Syndicate’. What are ya’ll plannin’ ta do?”
Watcher turned his nose up with a dark scowl. “I’m not saying a damn thing.”
Applejack narrowed her eyes. “Well, there’s more than one way ta milk a cow.”
“Milk a…? Aren’t cows sentient creatures just like- uwah!!”
To the Neighponese ponies and griffons passing by, it was the strangest sight since those robed weirdos marched by a few days ago. They stopped and watched as two ponies had a Stand battle – which invoked some deep, personal questions such as ‘do we have Stands, too?’ – and then shortly after that, one of the foreign ponies picked up the defeated Stand user and bent him over her shoulders.
While standing on her hind legs.
“Come on, come on, come on!” She chanted, bouncing him up and down with painful-looking jerks. “Ah do this ta mah bro’ when he tries ta sneak away after eatin’ th’ last bar of chocolate in th’ fridge. Big Mac’s his name an’ he’s big enough ta eat ya an’ still have room fer supper. Know what ah’m gettin’ at, pardner?”
Watcher yelped. “Stop! Uncle! Uncle!”
“Means tha’ ain’t gonna run out of steam anytime soon! So, cough it out!”
“Ack! Okay, I’ll talk!”
Applejack tossed him back onto the ground. Fortunately, Watcher was smart enough to not try and run.
“I don’t know much; I just take a paycheck and go where she tells me to go.”
“Who does?”
“My supervisor,” Watcher cautiously stood up, wary of the farmer’s hooves. “Her name’s Hana Kagayaku.”
“Hana Kaka… what? Ya’ll messin’ with me?”
“It’s a Neighponese name, Applejack,” Twilight answered, approaching Watcher while flipping through her book. “Translated to Equestrian, I think the closest I can get is ‘Flower Sparkle’. But for courtesy’s sake, we should use ‘Hana Kagayaku’.”
“Look, I’m just a temp for the Syndicate, okay? This is literally my first week. They told me to act tough and stall anypony investigating the anime,” Watcher grimaced in fear. “S-so, are we cool?”
“You said the Syndicate was going to steal all the anime in Neighpan before the next step of their plan can proceed. What do you mean by that?”
“I swear I don’t know. I just overheard that when Hana was talking with her boss.”
Applejack stepped closer and glared into his eyes. Watcher whimpered and ducked his head, ears flattening. “… He’s tellin’ th’ truth.”
Pinkie suddenly appeared in front of him. “Ooh, you no-good-do’er! If you weren’t being honest, I’d slap you with a balloon mallet for stealing Equestria’s anime. So, instead, I’ll shake my hoof at you!”
She shook her hoof in anger.
Watcher gulped. “S-so fierce!”
Spike ran up to the group. “Hey, our map’s back.”
“Y-yes. Once I was defeated, [Emerald Daze] returned all the information. Also, I didn’t want to get hit more.”
“So, I guess you can show us where Hana would be, huh?”
Watcher sighed but took the map and marked a spot with a pen he pulled from his cloak. “I’m so not getting that raise now,” Handing back the map, he sighed and rubbed his head. “Hey, I’m gonna go now. I need to cry into a mug of cider.”
“Why?” Spike asked. “Because you lost?”
“Well, that, and I got dropped on my head from fifteen feet and it really hurts.” Watcher groaned and slinked off into the crowd that was slowly dispersing when they realized the show was over.
“Uh, is it alright to just let him go like that?” Twilight gestured to the retreating stallion.
“He’s defeated. Defeated villains don’t come back unless they’re popular, or they make a heel-face turn,” Pinkie answered. “Come on, Twily – don’t you know your anime?”
“Not as much as you, clearly,” Twilight said with a fond smile. “Hm… Well, I guess we can safely say that there is something going down here. We should pick up the pace. How far are we from Gravel Animation, Spike?”
“Just one more block. We should see the building when we turn this next corner.”
“I presume you are here to inform me that Watcher failed?”
“Uh, yeah.”
“Troubling. I had hoped these interlopers would be mere journalists, or something of a similar ilk, but we have garnered the attention of a greater authority than mere self-proclaimed bastions of the public.”
“Uh…”
“Forget it. My adoration for linguistic flair which seeks to confound my associates is flaring up again, Bovus. But you’re not here to pay an old stallion your faux interest, are you?”
“… Okay, so… Should I go watch the entrance?”
“That would be best. Also, before you return to your station, endeavour to bring me another tape from my personal cabinet. I have just finished this one. Attack of the Crawling Terror – are you aware of this piece?
“No.”
“It was directed by a mare named Magenta Tip in 951 AD, during the time when the novelty of crafting a stored form of visual stimuli was gradually becoming popular. Instead of having to peruse through TV channels, or be at the mercy of the broadcasting station's schedule, one would be able to enjoy a show using these storage containers - 'tapes' - whenever the mood suited them. Incidentally, Attack of the Crawling Terror was rather poorly received due to a nonsensical plot full of many inconsistencies. Even so, it holds sentimental value to me; it is a progenitor, you see, one of the very first film productions to be stored on a tape. This specific tape, amongst others, are relics from a time after the television set popularized-”
“Zeus’ Beard, if I get that tape, then will you shut up?”
Konnichi wa. Hajememashite. = Hello. Good day to you.
Watashinonamaeha Pinkie Pie. Anata wa saikin, kimyōna koto o mita koto ga arimasu ka? = My name is Pinkie Pie. Have you (seen any strange things lately)?
