> Derpy 262
>  by Killbles
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Arrival
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Klaus tilted the control stick slightly to the left, following his wing leader in perfect formation. He carefully scanned the skies, alert for any British or American aircraft. 
A faint crackle of radio static preceded his wing leaders transmission. 
“Sie sehen nichts?"
“Nein.” Klaus said back simply, returning his attention to the sky. The two jet engine in his Me 262 roared loudly, guzzling precious fuel. If they didn’t find something soon, they would have to return the airfield empty handed. Klaus sighed, he enjoyed the Me 262. It was a fast aircraft, the fastest in the Luftwaffe, but its combat ability was always curtailed by its frustratingly short range.
“Nun, es muss etwas sein. Mehrere Radar-Kontakte wurden hier zu sehen.” His wing leader shot back matter of factly. Klaus rolled his eyes. While the radar systems on the ground were usually reliable, the Allies had been able to spoof them before.
“Ich sehe nicht… Warten Sie… Was ist das?” Klaus wondered aloud. He pushed the speedy fighter into a shallow dive, moving closer towards the small mysterious grey object he could see.
“Was zur Hölle?” Klaus muttered as he drew closer to the small object. Now that he was closer he could see the thing was flittering around crazily, as if it was not entirely sure where it was going. It looked almost like a small horse with wings, but he was too far away to be sure.
“Acthung! Jabos!” One of the German pilots cried out. Klaus peeled away from the grey object, much more interested in hunting a real target. His blood was already racing from the prospect of a dog fight, Klaus snapped his head around to look of the incoming fighter bombers. 
“Ich sehe nur vier con ihnen.” One of the other pilots calmly responded. “Lager 258, sie müssen zur busis zurückkeheren.”
Using this new information, Klaus spotted the four retreating fighters. Thunderbolts, he realised. The American built planes may have been tough and well-armed, but they were much slower than the perusing German jets. The fighter bombers must be heading back to their airfield after escorting a large bomber mission.
“Sie haben uns nicht erkannt.” Klaus said over the radio as they snuck up to the unsuspecting fighter bombers. As they drew closer, a trio of bright flashing lights appeared off to the right, away from the allied fighters. The lights seemed to match the speed of Klaus’ jet and then speed up, an impossible feat for any aircraft.
“Was ist das?” Klaus asked concerned as the lights drew closer.
“Ich weiß nicht” one of the other pilots said, unsure of what the lights were.
“Ich werde schauen.” Klaus said as he banked towards the strange lights, his curiosity overcoming his discipline.
“Nein! Wieder hier!” his wing leader shot back over the radio.
Klaus ignored him and flicked his radio off, silencing his leader’s protests. He’d pay for it later but he didn’t care. He had heard tales about strange lights like these but no pilot had ever investigated them. There was never any record of them being dangerous so Klaus felt much safer chasing the lights rather than four planes armed to the teeth. As he closed on the lights, they became more erratic, flittering right then left and vanishing only to reappear moments later. 
“Was bist du?” Klaus asked, pulling underneath the lights.
As if answering his question the lights suddenly swarmed around his plane. Panicking, Klaus threw his jet into a steep climb but the lights seemed to follow him. Small arcs of lighting and a violet glow formed around the tips of his wings. A quiet buzzing filled the cabin as his aircraft was suddenly engulfed in the violet fire. Klaus screamed in fear as the world outside the canopy unexpectedly turned jet black and the small craft was thrown around violently. After what seemed like an eternity, another bright flash filled the cockpit and the world reappeared. Trying to calm himself down, Klaus took in the impossible sight. Somehow the once clear sky was now full of angry thunderheads and split with occasional bright flashes of lightning. The jet dipped suddenly as he hit turbulence.
“Scheisse!” Klaus yelled, grabbing the control stick. His pilot’s instincts kicked in and the impossibility of the situation was momentarily forgotten. Grappling for control, he managed to get his plane flying level. His problems were made worse by an orange light flicking on the dashboard. Klaus swore again to violent journey must have done something with his fuel supply as his aircraft was now running on its internal reserve fuel, he had maybe 10 minutes to land or the ungainly craft would plummet from the sky like a rock. Reigning in his speed in an attempt to conserve fuel and prepare himself for landing, he pushed the craft down towards the ground, desperately searching for a landing site. Even a field would do. Klaus felt his spirits lift as he broke through the bottom of the thick storm. There was a small village, maybe only a few kilometres away, close enough for him to land and find shelter. Pushing the stick forward, he descended faster, eager to get his plane out of the rough storm. Spotting what looked like a relatively flat field next to village, he angled his craft towards it. As he descended the last hundred meters, Klaus dropped the landing gear and prayed there weren’t any rocks hidden in the grass. His luck continued to hold as his jet roughly touched down and skidded to a halt over the sopping wet ground. Pulling the lever that raised the canopy, Klaus grabbed what few supplies he had in the cockpit. He stared at his luger for a moment and decided to bring it. He had no idea where he was and the locals might not exactly be sympathetic to his cause. Pulling his flight jacket closer around him, Klaus ran toward the relative safety of the village which was now only a few hundred meters away. As he approached, his mind tried to figure out what he was seeing that was wrong. Something seemed off with the town. Maybe it was that no one was outside or maybe that the village looked too out of place in rural France. As he past the first few houses he finally realised what was wrong. The houses seemed far too small, almost as if they were designed for people half his size. As he took in the sight of the village more, he noticed the second odd thing. The village seemed far too colourful and primitive for France. He knew of nowhere that had a similar architectural style to the one he was witnessing. He pushed the thoughts aside as he ran through the rain. Choosing a house at random he sprinted towards the door and rapped on the small knocker. 
“Hallo? Ist jemand zu Hause?”  He yelled over the rain. He knocked again after a few moments. A quiet murmur of conversation was heard inside. English, Klaus recognised in horror. He drew his luger and aimed it squarely at the door. If he was lucky, the occupant would be either unarmed or a English civilian who was caught in France when the war had started several years ago.
“Hände auf!” he yelled as the small portal swung open. The shout died in his throat as he saw what had opened the door.
A short pony, maybe slightly above waist high stood in the door, a surprised look on its face. The pony had a light tan coat and a forest brown mane. A curious hour glass was tattooed on its rump.
“Klein… Klein… Klein Pfred.” Klaus stuttered, his pistol falling limp in his hands.
“What the…” The pony said, making Klaus’ eyes bulge even wider. The shock was too great for him and he was left a stuttering wreck. 
“Klein…Pfred” was all he managed to stutter before he fainted in a heap.




Twilight galloped through the pelting rain, her saddlebags slapping roughly against her flanks. She followed the small grey unicorn that had shown up her door a few minutes ago through the deserted streets. While she couldn’t quite remember, she was fairly sure the filly’s name was Dinky. Ditzy the mailmare’s daughter. 
“This way Miss Sparkle!” Dinky yelled out over the pounding sheets of rain. She turned down a narrow street that led to the edge of town, slipping in the mud Twilight followed her coming to a sudden stop as Dinky rapped on the door of a small but welcoming house. The door quickly swung open and the pair was ushered in by a brown stallion. Twilight’s eyes were immediately caught by the strange creature resting on the lounge, a blanket draped over its wet body.
“Thanks Dinky, why don’t you go make yourself a cup of cocoa while I talk to Miss Sparkle? The stallion asked. Dinky nodded and left the room.
“Thank you for coming so quickly Miss Sparkle, I apologise for calling you out like this in such terrible weather.” The stallion said quietly to Twilight.
“Call me Twilight.” She said. She looked at the stallion curiously for a moment. “Have we met before?”
The stallion flushed in embarrassment. “No I don’t believe so. Ditzy holds you high regard though. I’m her husband Doctor Hooves.” 
“A doctor ? Always good to see another intellectual.” Twilight said with a smile. She suddenly became more serious. “I’m guessing your problem has to do with that?” she said gesturing towards the creature.
“Indeed. I’ve never seen anything like it before. Have you?”
No.” She pulled out one of the several books she had brought and started leafing through it quickly.
“Defining features?” she asked, not looking up.
“Bipedal, Four limbs, two ending in what appear to digits of which It has five digits on each; two of these appears to be opposable. It seemed capable of speech as it yelled something at me but I didn’t understand it. No hair covering its body except on the top of its head. It was also carrying that when it showed up.” He pointed at a curious metal object on the table near the creature. Leaving her book for a moment, Twilight levitated it over to her and examined it curiously.
“It seems to be made with a high level of workmanship, definitely not something made by ponies.” She looked closer. “It seems to have some sort of trigger mechanism connected to a stylised hammer of some sort, but what it does I have no idea.” She debated whether she should try to use the strange device. ‘Nothing ventured, nothing gained.’ She thought and tugged the trigger down with a touch of magic.
“Woah!” she yelled as the device discharged with a loud crack. She dropped the device immediately. “You ok?” she asked the Doctor who had jumped behind a chair when the device had fired.
“Fine.” The doctor said shakily, surprised at the loud noise the device had made.
Her curiosity reinvigorated, Twilight picked the device up again. “I think it fires small metal objects. See?” she held up a spent bullet casing. She rooted around for a moment longer before finding the bullet embedded in the floor. She levitated it over to the doctor. “It appears to fire these. What they do though, I don’t know, but I imagine they would be painful if they hit you due to the speed it left the device." He face scrunched up in a thoughtful manner. "I would say based on these findings, this device would appear to be some form of weapon. Much more advanced than anything I’ve ever seen or even heard of though.” She set the bullet and the gun down again and continued leafing through the book. A scowl appeared over her face as the number of pages she hadn’t read diminished.
“Nothing.” She announced slightly irked but excitedly. “It’s not something we’ve had contact with before. Imagine it Doctor! A whole new species we didn’t know about.” She clapped her hooves together excitedly. 
Dinky appeared a moment later. “What was that loud bang?” she asked, looking nervously at the still sleeping creature.
“Nothing to worry about Darling.” Doctor Hooves said calmly.
The creature groaned causing Dinky to squeak in fear.
“Where’s mummy?” she asked worriedly, turning to her father.
The doctor tilted his head to said as it was the first time he had ever thought of it. “That’s a good question; she should be back by now. Maybe she’s taking shelter somewhere from the weather?” he suggested.
“You don’t suppose this thing had anything to do with it?” Twilight asked.
“I wouldn’t think so.” The doctor curtly responded.
The creature’s eyes suddenly shot open and it sat up quickly in shock. It scrambled away fearfully from the ponies in front of it, discarding the rug that had been covering it haphazardly. Dinky squealed again and dived behind the Doctor.
“Was ist los? Wo bin ich?” it said, eyes wide with fear and confusion. 
Twilight looked at the Doctor and shook he head. She didn’t understand what it was saying at all. 
“Hello?” she asked, trying to look friendly.
Klaus’ eyes shot to the lavender pony. He had recognised what she had said; he had recognised what a pony had said! He disregarded that thought as preposterous, ponies didn’t talk, let alone live in houses. Maybe he had been hit and he was hallucinating. Maybe this was just a dream. ‘Maybe I should talk back’ he thought. ‘Can’t make anything worse…’
“Hallo.” He said nervously, his eyes flickering around the room, it appeared well lived in. Several photos hung from the wall. He noticed there was another pony in the photos that was missing. 
“My name is Twilight Sparkle. Do you have a name?” The unicorn asked.
Klaus screwed his face up. He understood a few words, but his grasp of English was limited. 
“Sprechen sie Deutsch?” he asked hopefully.
“I’m sorry, I don’t understand you.” Twilight said slowly.
Klaus didn’t really understand, but he guessed from the Unicorns expression of confusion that it didn’t speak German.
“My name is Twilight Sparkle, do you have a name?” Twilight asked again, miming some words to help get her message across. 
“I… Have name, yes.” He stuttered, trying to dredge up some English words from classes he had taken when he was in school.
“What is your name?”
“My name is Klaus.” He said back slowly, trying to keep himself from passing out again. He was talking to a lavender pony after all. Mad!
“Where are you from? How did you get here?” Twilight said slowly.
Klaus again only understood a few words. 
“I am Klaus Fliechfresser, I am from... Jagdverband vierundvierzig, Luftwaffe. I do… not know how I am here.” He let out a  breath as he answered. The talking pony seemed friendly enough but he was still a bit shocked by the recent events. “I am sorry. I... do not… know much English.” He added.
“English?” Twilight asked.
“Ja, is what you… speak.” He said.
Twilight flashed look at the Doctor before taking a note. Wherever this thing came from, some spoke the some language that they did. A fact she found very interesting.
“How… do… you talk?” Klaus asked looking at the three ponies. One he noticed was even smaller than the other two. A foal he guessed. “Where I am from…” he struggled with the word and reverted back to German. “Pfred.. do not talk.”
“Pfred?” Twilight said, struggling with the pronunciation of the foreign word.
“Ja, you are… pfred… Klein pfred.”
“So… Pony?” Twilight asked hopefully.
“Klein pony, yes. Pony do not talk. They make other sound.” He imitated neighing. “How do you talk?”
“I don't know, we have always been able to talk.” The Doctor said, bristling slightly at the strangers comment.
“What are you?” Twilight asked again.
“I am Klaus”
“No, that’s who you are. What are you?” she said trying to sound friendly.
Klaus looked her blankly.
“I am a pfred. You are…?” She added helpfully.
“Ah.. I am… Mensch... How do you say…” he racked his memory, “Human. I am man.”
“How did you get here? I haven’t seen a human before.”
“I fly.” He imitated flying with a hand.
It was Twilight’s turn to look at him dumbly. The so-called Human had no wings, and she doubted he could flap his arms hard enough to overcome the force of  gravity.
“How do you fly? You don’t have wings.”
“I do not fly… I do not know how to say. I can… show you? Yes?”
He stood shakily and walked to the door. He opened at and was rewarded with a strong gale of wind and a solid sheet of rain. He closed the small door quickly.
“Show me later.” Twilight said.
“Yes.” He said, sitting down sadly. The fear in his eyes was gone but he still looked very pale. The poor thing was probably suffering from shock Twilight concluded.
“Are you okay?” Twilight asked.
“I am.. okay. Am just… Schockiert.” He said, unsure of the word. He imitated surprise, so the ponies would understand.
“I see.” Twilight said writing something else. Klaus realised for the first time the quill she was writing with was floating. He sprung up again.
“Wie hast du das germact?” he asked slightly cautious. He did not believe in magic so seeing the pony so casually perform it surprised him somewhat.
“Pardon?” Doctor Hooves asked,looking up from the still shaking filly next to him.
Klaus shook his head, the ponies didn’t understand German. “How did… How did you do that?” he asked.
“What, this?” Twilight asked, levitating the quill again.
“Ja.”
“I’m a unicorn, I can use magic.” She said, tapping her horn gently. 
“Magie?” Klaus breathed. “Verwunderlich”
Then he fainted again.




Ditzy fluttered around aimlessly. She had no idea what had just happened, or where she was. One moment she had been battling through a fierce storm when a purple glow had surrounded her. A moment later she had appeared in a clear sky. In panic, she had flown aimlessly around. Her state of mind was not helped by the fact that she had been approached by a very loud metal bird. Luckily for her, it had flown off very quickly and left her alone once again.
“Where am I?” she asked, an edge of hysteria in her voice.
She panicked for a moment and fell a few meters as her wings locked up.
“Okay, calm down Ditzy. Just calm down.” She muttered taking several deep breaths. Looking around, she spotted a dark forest off in the distance. ‘Maybe that’s the Everfree’ she thought,’ Maybe I got lost.’ Setting her bearings, she flew towards the forest. She knew that Ponyville lay somewhere along its boundary, so if she headed towards it, she would find her way home. With a renewed sense of purpose, she flapped he wings and shot off towards the dark green tree line.

Ditzy flapped her wings tiredly. She had been flying for hours and although she had reached the forest, she could see no sign of her hometown. In fact, now she thought of it, the entire landscape looked different. A surge of panic started to well up again but she forced it down. Desperately looking around for any clues of her whereabouts, she spotted a small column of movement below her. What looked like several carts trundled along a dirt road that skirted the edge of the forest beneath her. A hint of hope flaring up, she swooped down into the trees, landing with a soft thump. Peering from the relative safety of the tree line, she took in a sharp intake of breath. The carts were unlike any other she had ever seen. They were clad in metal and each rolled forward on a pair of tracks. Each had a small turret on top where a few weary looking creatures were relaxing. A small flag with red and white overlapping crosses on a blue background flew proudly from one of the carts. A few of the creatures trudged alongside the strange vehicles. The entire spectacle left her in awe. She stood there, rooted to the ground in amazement as the convoy passed by.  She was snapped out of her reverie by a loud crack off to her right which made her spin around in surprise. She found herself staring at a pair of the pink creatures wearing dark khaki fatigues. Each one was carrying a long wooden and metal stick. They were talking in hushed tones, both intently staring at her. She opened her wings in panic, ready to fly off.
“No wait! Don’t go!” a voice called out softly.




Corporal Duffy raised a hand, motioning for the man behind him to stop. To his disbelief, a small pegasus had just swooped down out of the sky and landed about twenty meters in front of him. He turned to the Soldier behind him.
“Elliot, look! Is that a Pegasus?”
“Don’t be stupid Duffy, they aren’t real.” Lance Corporal Elliot shot back, crawling next to his friend.
“Look mate, there’s one standing right bloody there. See?” Duffy insisted, pointing at the impossible creature.
“That can’t be real though.” Duffy insisted following his friend's pointing finger. “We must be imagining things. I think this war has finally got to our heads.”
Duffy pointed to the unit insignia stitched on his upper sleeve. “See, a bloody Pegasus.” He said returning his gaze to the small grey Pegasus that had landed in front of him a moment ago.
“I think I need a cuppa about now.” Elliot responded, taking a tiny step back. A loud crack suddenly came from a small stick he had crushed under his boot. The Pegasus wheeled round and stared at them in alarm.
“Jesus Christ, it’s looking at us.” Duffy said.
“I can see that you tot.” Elliot snapped.
“No wait! Don’t go!” Duffy called softly to the Pegasus, as it opened its wings. Much to his surprise, it stopped mid flap. The look in its eyes went one of panic and fear, to one of curiosity.
“We won’t hurt you. Promise.” Duffy continued.
The small winged horse tucked its wings back in and took a cautious step towards them. “Are you hungry??” Duffy asked softly, pulling an apple he had pilfered from an orchard earlier that morning. He hesitantly offered it the wary creature.
“Hey Duff, look at its eyes.” Elliot whispered pointing at the two mismatched golden orbs. Now that the Pegasus was facing them, they could see that one of its eyes was slightly skewed.
“Must have a lazy eye or something.” Duffy whispered back, as he held the apple out, encouraging the small creature to come closer..
The diminutive creature took a few careful steps towards them, pausing ever now and then as if it was trying to figure out if it could trust them. It suddenly zipped forward and grabbed the apple out of Duffy’s hand, much to his surprise, and withdrew a few steps. The pair of paratroopers looked on in wonder as it devoured the apple hungrily. 
“Thank you.” It said mid-bite. “I was getting hungry after all that flying.”
“No proble-.” Duffy said, stopping mid-sentence as his brain suddenly froze. He turned to his equally astonished comrade. ”Did it just talk?” 
“Uh-huh.” 
“We’re definitely crazy now. Horses can’t talk.” Duffy said quietly so the Pegasus couldn’t hear them.
“A Pegasus isn't even supposed to exist.” Elliot reminded him slowly.
Ditzy looked up from the apple core at the two soldiers, oblivious to their conversation. “I’m Ditzy. What’s your name? Do you have names? What are you? I’ve never seen anything like you before. What’s with the metal carts and what are those sticks you’re holding?” she gushed, curious about these strange creatures with the funny accents and strange uniforms.
“Jesus Christ.” Elliot muttered, deciding to sit down before he fell down.
“Umm… Well...” Duffy spluttered. “I’m Duffy and this is my buddy, Elliot. 7st British Parachute Battalion at your service.” He said uncertainly. He was talking with a mythical flying horse after all.
“Nice to meet you!” she said cheerfully. She was slightly disappointed that they hadn’t answered more of her questions but she decided she quite liked these ‘British’ things.
“So how far from Ponyville am I? Where am I anyway? And where are you going?” she asked, sure that the two SAS things would know where she had to go.
The two soldiers looked at each other blankly. 
“Where?” they said in unison.
Ditzy’s face fell. “Haven’t you heard of it? It’s one of the largest villages in Equestria.”
“Sorry, Ditzy was it?” Duffy asked, still slightly dubious of his sanity. The Pegasus nodded.
“We ain’t heard of no Ponyville or Equestria. Sounds like some fairyland to me and I haven’t got the foggiest idea where they are. Sorry Darl.”
Ditzy’s ears drooped down. Well… well... then where am I?”
Without warning the metal cart at the front of the column exploded, making any further conversation impossible, a brilliant fireball erupted into the sky as its ammunition cooked off. Duffy and Elliot dived to the ground, pulling Ditzy with them.
“Ambush!” a nearby voice yelled over the explosion. “Contact front!”
Ditzy cowered in fear at the sudden loud cracks and the screams of pain she could hear.
“Welcome to France, Ditzy.”


> Dicussions of war
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ditzy winced as Duffy plunged the set of tweezers into the wound. Her leg twitched as the cold metal probed around inside the flesh on her hind leg.
“Sorry,” the soldier muttered. “Normally a proper medic would do this, but they’re a little busy.”
Dizty nodded and clenched her teeth as he groped around inside of her wound for the small piece of shrapnel stuck there.
“Does it always hurt this much?” she asked as he missed the offending piece of metal, causing her to flinch again.
“It’d help if you weren’t jumping all over the place.” Duffy said roughly. He adopted a more gentle tone before he continued. “We’ve got medicine which makes it less painful, but this is a fairly minor wound. Also I’m not sure what would happen to you if I gave you morphine, so let’s stay on the safe side here.
“Minor?!” Ditzy yelped as he grasped the piece of metal and started gently removing it. 
“It’s minor you softy. I was shot in the arse a few months ago. I suppose you could say it was a real pain in the arse.” He paused for a moment to let his incredibly lame joke sink in.
“That’s not funny.” Ditzy grunted.
Duffy shrugged and continued. “Just a flesh wound luckily and I was back into it within a few weeks.”  He said with a hint of amusement. “There we go, got the little blighter.” He held a small piece of metal in front of Ditzy so he could see what had hit her. “Maybe you can keep it as a souvenir.” Duffy joked, wrapping Ditzy’s wound efficiently with a small bandage.   She nodded silently and cast her eyes out the back of the metal wagon Duffy had called a ‘truck’. The skirmish that afternoon, while at first an unwelcome surprise to the British men, had been wrapped up quickly and with minimal losses. According to Elliot, ‘Jerry’ had severely miscalculated the strength of the column and had paid dearly for their negligence. 
Several hours had passed since then; night had fallen, causing the convoy to come to a stop by the side of the road. Several men were still moving quietly around the large armoured vehicles that Duffy had explained were ‘Shermans’ and ‘Cromwells’. She hadn’t quite figured out the difference yet, but she had absorbed so much information since stumbling upon the nice British men that it honestly didn’t surprise her. She had spent most of the afternoon bouncing around in the back of the packed truck trying to ignore the pain in her leg and learning about this strange and dangerous new world. The other men that she had ridden with were gone now though, out on watch or in other trucks eating or sleeping.
“Oi, got you your food, a fine choice of ration packs and some other tasteless shit.” Elliot said with mock cheer as his face suddenly appeared around the back of the covered truck. He handed Duffy a small pot and jumped up into the back of the smelly truck. He was joined by two other men that Ditzy didn’t recognise.
“Evening chaps.” Duffy remarked as the two clambered inside. “You met Ditzy yet?” he gestured to the sprawled out Pegasus taking up some of the truck bed. 
“Heard about her.” One of them remarked, munching enthusiastically on his meal.
“Finding a talking flying horse don’t exactly stay quiet around here. I reckon you two must have lost your mind when you bumped into her.” The other remarked.
“That’s an understatement.” Elliot chuckled.
“Hello.” Ditzy said looking up at the two men. A small flash of surprise crossed their faces. Although they had heard a few rumours about her, they were still surprised to hear her talk.
“Nice to meet you Ma’am, I’m Charlie. I’m these two clown’s boss, one of them at least.” The tall rugged one said, nodding politely.
“Charlie here is our sergeant.” Duffy piped up. “Makes sure we’re remembering to point our guns the right way and not dicking around too much.”
“And I’m Sergeant Harris.” The other one said smiling. Ditzy noticed with confusion that he had a slightly different uniform and wasn’t quite as rugged as the other three. “Most of the lads call me Harry though.”
“Harry is one the tankies, he’s the gunner on that one over there.” Elliot explained. He pointed to a Sherman with a longer than normal barrel that was partially shrouded by the dark night. “We’ve only been with his unit for a few days but Harry is shaping up to be a fine scrounger for us Paras.”
“Of course being a tankie, some of the lads say he should get out and run a bit more.” Duffy added with a snicker.
“Well I think some of the lads should shut their fucking mouths.” Harry remarked, giving Duffy a scathing look.
The other men chuckled lightly before returning their attention to the Pegasus.
“That’s a nice little wound you got there.” Charlie remarked, tugging the bandage wrapped around her hind leg. “How’d you get that?”
“She was unlucky enough to be around when one of those German Stick bombs went off, just a few little scratches and a small piece of shrapnel though, nothing too serious.” Duffy explained, remembering Ditzy whinnying in pain when the grenade had exploded. It was a sound he never wanted to hear again, a heart-wrenching sound of a small and helpless creature in a cruel and uncaring world. Although he had only known Ditzy for a few hours, he was already growing fond of the small winged pony.
“So where are you from?” We don’t see many…” Harry trailed off.
“Pegasus.” Duffy helpfully reminded him.
“Right, We don’t see many Pegasus in these parts.”
Ditzy shifted her weight off her hind leg and made herself a little more comfortable on the hard metal before she started.
“I’m from Ponyville. It’s one of the large border villages in Equestria. You haven’t heard of it have you?”
Charlie and Harry looked at her with confusion. “Never heard of it.” They said in unison.
“I assumed as much.” She sighed sadly. “I don’t know where I am. When I was outside before, the stars in the sky look completely different, the constellations we have back home are gone. Nothing looks the same. I’ve never even heard of France or Europe before today.” She said quietly. Duffy and Elliot had shown her a small map of France earlier that day. Much to her surprise, the land looked nothing like Equestria. The familiar mountain ranges and fields were gone and replaced by dense forests and rolling hills.
“So… You’re not from around these parts then.” Charlie said obviously, placing his now empty food dish on the floor of the truck with a soft rattle.
“Yeah.”
“Suppose you’ve travelled between worlds or something. Like Gulliver or Alice maybe?” Harry piped up. Unlike the others in the truck, he was an avid reader and enjoyed imagining the fantastic and the impossible. The other occupants of the vehicle looked at him like he gone mad.
“Why would you say that?”
“Well I’ll be frank Ditzy, you’re a Pegasus. While that might not seem strange to you, to us, you’re kind of legendary. A Pegasus is a mythical creature so by general common sense you shouldn’t exist. By that, I think you must have come from somewhere else. I mean Alice fell down a rabbit hole and look what she found. What if Ditzy did something similar?”
“Mate, that’s a children’s book. Think seriously here.” Charlie said dryly.
“She isn’t even supposed to be real.” Harry countered, “Maybe you should open your mind a bit.”
The truck was silent for a moment. While Ditzy understood that Harry was just trying to help, she couldn’t help but feel a little hurt by his comment.
“Tell us about your home…  Where you come from. What’s it like?” Charlie ordered.
Ditzy blinked at stared at the roof of the truck, thoughts swirling in her head. What if she wasn’t in Equestria? Then what? How would she get home? What would happen to Dinky without her?
“Ditzy?”
“Yeah… Um. It’s nice. Really nice. It’s beautiful, I’m sure you’d like it. The fields are full of lush grass and crops, the forests are green and lush and when autumn comes around they turn a beautiful red and orange as the leaves fall.” She let out a sad sigh, she was already homesick. “Ponyville itself is a small village in the south of Equestria. It’s bordered by a large snow-capped mountain range to the south and sweeping fields all the way north to the capital Canterlot which sits on the side of a mountain.  From there, we are ruled by our two princesses who raise the sun and the moon each day. Princess Celestia rules the day while her Sister, Luna, rules the night.” She sniffled quietly. “Sorry, I guess you never realise how good something is until it’s gone…”
Duffy gave her a reassuring pat on the head. “You’ll get home, somehow, but you’ll get there.”
Charlie whistled lowly. “That’s a pretty hard tale to believe. How the hell do your princesses raise the sun and the moon?”
Ditzy shrugged. “Magic.”
“You can’t seriously believe in magic can you?”
“All unicorns in Equestria can use magic. I don’t know how it works, but it does. I guess it’s just normal for us. Don’t you have magic here?”
The truck was silent again for a moment as the four men digested this new information.
“Just cheap card tricks and illusions. Not real magic like you’re talking about.” Elliot said
Charlie shook his head in disapproval. “Magic isn’t real mate. No such thing. Look, it was nice meeting you Ditzy, but I’ve gotta head off. Unlike these three, I’ve actually got some work to do.” Charlie muttered. He pulled the back flap of the truck out and leapt down gracefully.
Ditzy looked after him sadly. “Doesn’t he believe me?”
Elliot flashed a supportive look at her. “Don’t worry about him darl, It’s a bit much for us to just accept. Things are much different here. Sure the world is full of beautiful places like yours is, but we are a lot more…” he trailed off as he searched for the right word. “Skeptical.” He said. “Most people wouldn’t believe what you said. Most people wouldn’t even believe you exist. We’re really not a nice lot to be around, in comparison, your world sounds like a fairy tale.” He explained.
“But you’re nice…” Ditzy said looking between the three men. “Everypon- Everyone” she corrected “I’ve met here seems really nice.”
“Humans are bastards. Ditzy, we’re fighting a war remember? Have your people ever fought a war against your own kind?” 
She shook her head.
"My point exactly."
“I suppose.” Ditzy muttered grudgingly, laying her head down on her forelegs. She was unwilling to simply accept that all humans were bad people. The three men in the truck with her were living proof that they weren’t. A gentle pattering started on the canvas above their heads.
“You know, I’m starting to think with all this rain, that God‘s a fucking Jerry.” Duffy muttered turning his eyes up.
“Can’t you just control the weather? Move clouds around and stuff?” Ditzy asked, used to how Equestrian weather control worked.
Duffy laughed. “That’s rich. If I could move the clouds, I’d let all the goddamn Nazi’s have em.” 
“What’s a Nazi?” Ditzy asked.
“There are the people we are fighting. Well to be fair, that’s the government. Not all the Germans are Nazis.” Harry rumbled. “Adolf Hitler is their leader. He’s an evil man.”
“Why?” Ditzy asked, turning to look at the sergeant.
The question threw the man a little. He had never had someone ask him that before.
“Because he stated this bloody war, that’s why.” Duffy muttered angrily, filling in for his comrade. “Germany wasn’t enough for him. Bloody tosser he is.”
“War….” Ditzy rolled the unfamiliar word around.
“Yeah, an entire world war. World War Two.”
“World war?” Ditzy asked. “I don’t understand.”
“Harry, chuck me that paper will you? I’ll draw it for you Ditzy.” He pulled a rough pencil out of his pocket and drew a rough map of the world on the crumpled sheet. Once he had finished he circled roughly where Germany was.
“Right, September 1, 1939. Hitler invaded Poland. We, the United Kingdom and our allies declare war on Germany. Despite this, we offer no real support and he conquers the country quickly. In May, Hitler’s armies then push through Belgium and Belgium in a matter of weeks. France is then attacked and surrenders by late June. Italy also joins Hitler. In the meantime, Japan is invading China all the way over here.” He pointed to the respective countries. “Japan then joins the alliance with Italy and Germany forming the main Axis powers. Germany and Italian forces also attack northern Africa." he paused to take a breath. "Skip forward a year. The Axis powers turn on their former ally, Russia and are only held back by the Russians tenacity and the timely arrival of winter. The Japanese attack the Americans in late 1941, dragging them into the war as well on our side. Skip forward to 1944. We’ve retaken North Africa already and launched the largest invasion ever seen to retake France. By now, almost every country in the world is at war. The will of one man effectively hurled the world into another world-wide war a mere twenty years after the last one ended.” Duffy scrunched the crude map up and hurled it out the back of the truck in disgust. “Millions of men, women and children dead because of him and the entire world is thrown into turmoil, that's why he is evil..” 

Ditzy looked at him, mouth agape. The idea of an entire country at war was hard enough to think about, ever mind an entire world. The idea didn’t seem possible to her.
“And… And this is normal?” she asked shakily.
“It bloody well feels like it.” Duffy snarled. He silently brooded for a moment, lost in his own thoughts. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have gotten angry like that. I just want to go home. See my family again.” he tugged out a small photo out of his pocket and held it in front of Ditzy. A beautiful woman holding a small child was captured on small piece of colourless paper. “That’s my wife, and that’s my daughter. She’d only be turning seven this year. If we get through this deployment, maybe I’ll get to see them again.” He explained, holding the picture in front of her before putting it away carefully “Do you have family Ditzy?” he asked quietly.
“Yes. I have a husband and a daughter. I miss them already.” She said sadly.
The truck lapsed back into silence save for the light pattering of rain on the canvas above them. Harry fiddled with a small trinket of his and Elliot had closed his eyes, trying to get some sleep.
“I think I’d better head back to my unit.” Harry said, standing. “Don’t want the leftentant thinking I’ve done or runner or something. Nice chatting with you as always. Nice meeting you Ditzy. Cheerio.” He pulled the back flap up, letting a light drizzle of rain in before leaping out with a wet squelch. The flap closed again, shutting the rain out leaving the three alone in the truck. 
Duffy was about to close his eyes when Ditzy spoke up. 
“Duffy, do humans always fight?”
He sat there for a moment, silent as he thought about what to say to the naïve Pegasus.
“Yes. We do. Whether it is for land, resources or revenge, we always fight.”
“Why?”
“Because that’s the way the world works.” He said back gruffly. “Now how about you be quiet and go to sleep. I’m sure you’ve had a crazy enough day, now get some rest.” He rolled over, facing away from Ditzy and closed his eyes. 
Ditzy lay her head back down on her forelegs and closed her eyes. She felt a small tear creep out and run slowly down her face.
“I just want to go home.” She said softly.






Klaus opened his eyes slowly. He rubbed his eyes and yawned loudly. What a dream, talking ponies and magic! He let out a quiet chuckle; his imagination could run a little rampant sometimes. His mirth was abruptly ended when he realised that the surface he was lying on was far too soft for his barracks bunk.He was also sure the sun didn’t shine through the window in the mornings. He opened his eyes wide and slowly turned his head sideways. The room was the same one as his ‘dream’. ‘Maybe this isn’t a dream.’ He thought with horror. A soft cough interrupted his thoughts. Looking down, he was surprised to see the small foal from yesterday seated on the floor, looking at him expectantly. 
“Good morning” it said curiously, Klaus guessed from its high voice that it was female. She pushed a large plate with food towards him with her curiously short, round snot. 
“Guten Morgen.” Klaus said eyeing the food. His stomach growled at the sight. 
“I didn’t know what you ate, so I kinda made you everything…” the filly said shyly.
“Sorry, I do not… Hear what you say. Could you say again? ” Klaus said rubbing his head.
The little pony repeated itself a little louder.
“Oh… Bitte.” Klaus said picking up the plate and examining the food. Some appeared to be hay of some kind which Klaus passed off as inedible. “Is this… Brot? Sorry… Bread?” he asked pointing at two white slices. He was much more used to dark rye bread and was not accustomed to such delicacies as white bread.  The filly nodded in response.
“And this… Apple?” He asked pointing at the large apple looking fruit on the plate. While it may have seemed silly to ask such questions, he was curious to see what foodstuffs were named. Much to his surprise the filly nodded again. ‘Besides the ponies, this place doesn’t seem too different from home…’ he thought. Hauling himself up into a sitting position, he took a cautious bite out of the apple, pleased to find it sweet and juicy. Driven by his hunger, he scarfed down the rest of the meal quickly, the little pony watching him the whole time. He noticed with a hint of surprise a small horn poking out from under its mane. He looked around the room, again surprised to find a small bullet hole in the carpet. ‘This morning is just full of surprises.’ he thought dumbly. He finished the small meal and placed the plate back on the floor. He stood and nodded to the small filly. “I am thankful for the food and… urh… obdach.” He said gesturing to the house. “But I must go.”
He briefly looked for his personal effects but much to his chagrin, could not find them anywhere. Most concerning of all, his luger was missing. He considered asking the small grey filly where they were but did not know how to ask. Shrugging, he opened the door and walked outside, careful to duck his head so he did not hit the door frame. Thankfully the street was mostly deserted, the few ponies out either giving the strange newcomer a cautious look or running off. Mentally remembering the path he had taken to get here, Klaus set off to find his aircraft. A small splash behind him made him wheel around. To his surprise, he was being followed by the small grey filly. He knelt down and looked into her eyes. “Why… Why do you follow me?” he asked in broken English.
“Because I want to.” She responded as if it was plainly obvious. “I’m Dinky by the way.” She added holding a hoof up for him to shake. Klaus looked at it awkwardly for a moment before gently shaking it. Her fur was soft and warm to touch. 
“Klaus.” He said simply before turning on his heel and continued marching out of town. 

After splashing through a few large puddles, Klaus found himself outside the edge of the town. Turning his gaze towards the fields, he saw his grey Messerschmitt standing out clearly against the lush green field. A small trio of ponies played around and investigated the strange craft. Much to Klaus’ surprise, they didn’t flee when he approached. 
“Good morning Klaus. Did you sleep well?” A familiar voice said as he approached the plane. A purple head appeared from the cockpit. He drew back slightly in surprise but recognised the face.
“Urh… Sparkle?” he asked uncertainly.
The unicorn giggled. “Twilight.”
“Entschuldigen sie Frau Twilight…” He caught himself mid-sentence. ‘English!’ He reminded himself. “Frau Twilight, what are you doing in my Messerschmitt?”
“Oh so that’s what it is called?” she asked, ducking her head back inside and ignoring his question. The three ponies Klaus had noticed before were now sitting on the wing and staring at him with wide eyes.
“Ja.” He responded irritably. Her inquisitive nature was starting to bother him slightly.
“Was this what you wanted to show me?” she asked, her head popping back up, an excited smile on her face.
“Ja.” He said again.
“So… What is it?”
“Is Messerschmitt zwie-sechs-zwie. Schellste Flugzeug in die Luftwaffe und der erste Düsenjäger der welt. Bewaffnet mit vier 30 Millimetre-Kannonen fähig, sich einen amerikanischen schweren Bombenflugzeug in wenigen Einstellungen-.”
“English?” Twilight interrupted, cocking her head to the side.
“Sorry, I get… excited about it.” he scratched his head. “I do not know in English. Sorry. Maybe I can… zeichnen?” he asked miming drawing a picture.
“Draw?”
“Yes. I can draw maybe?”
She levitated a scroll, a quill and an ink well over to the German pilot. He took the offered items after a moment of hesitation; he would take a while to get used to her magical abilities. Walking to the wing, he laid the parchment out and began drawing what he had said as simply as he could. He paused for a moment and for a reason he couldn’t quite place a finger on, decided to not include the fact the plane was armed. The three fillies on the wing craned their necks and watched him curiously. 
“’Excuse me mister, what’cha drawin’?” the one with a muted yellow coat asked. 
“I am drawing this.” He waved at the plane.
“Wah?”
“Because I cannot speak.”
“Yer speaking fine ter me.”
Klaus looked up at the filly. “Ich spreche nicht gut Englisch und habe Schwierigkeiten, wie ist. Auch bitie die Klappe Halten.” He said angrily, immediately regretting that he had raised his voice at the small pony. 
“Umm… Sorry?” She said, drawing back slightly.
“How about you three run off, I’m sure Klaus has enough on his hands without you three being around.” Twilight intervened.
“Okay…” they said together, walking sullenly back towards the town.
Klaus thanked Twilight silently and returned to his drawing.
“Sorry, am not usually mad like that. Bad day.” He explained.
“I can imagine.” Twilight said smugly.
“Ms Sparkle? What is this thing?” a little voice asked.
Peering down from the cockpit, Twilight saw Dinky sniffing one of the wheels curiously.
“Dinky! What are you doing here?”
“I followed him. I was curious.” She said abashedly.
Twilight rolled her eyes. 
“Well since you ask, I believe this is some sort of crewed device for flying. But that’s impossible as heavier than air flight is impossible without magic. Unless you are born with wings, you can’t fly. But this is what gets me, just look at it! It’s aerodynamically sound, it has a large flat area capable of generating lift and all the other important parts something would need to fly. It’s clearly made to fly, but it just doesn’t seem possible! There is no way it could generate enough power to lift itself off the ground.” She said pointing upwards.
“Aerody-what now?” Dinky asked confused. 
“Frau Twilight. Look” Klaus said, interrupting Twilight before she could lecture Dinky on the finer points of aerodynamics. He passed her a crudely drawn image of his plane. 
She studied the image for a short time. “Oh! So they are engines?” she asked, pointing a hoof at the cylinders slung under the wings.
“Yes I think, I do not know word. They push plane forward. Make… fly?” he said, hoping he had used to right words.
“I see now. They must be very powerful, much more so than any steam turbine we have. How do they work?” She asked, ignoring the confused looks on Klaus’ face.
“I do not understand.” He said
“Work.” Twilight asked slowly, “How do they work?”
“Work?” Klaus took the picture back and drew a rough image of the engine. He had a basic understanding of how a jet engine worked and drew a detailed diagram as he could for the unicorn. He handed it back to her when he had finished.
“Fascinating.” She remarked. A sudden squawk from the cockpit scared her and sent Klaus scrambling. He had heard a transmission, he was sure of it. 
“What was that?” Twilight asked a small amount of courage returning to her voice.
“It sounded like a bird.” Dinky added, trying to be helpfully.
“Nein. No. Was radio noise. Am sure of it.” Klaus said frantically fiddling with his receiver. “Did you turn on?” he asked remembering that he had flicked the device off yesterday.
“I-I don’t know. I scrambled around in here for a little while so I may of. Did I break something?”
“Nein, is good thing.” He said, making some small adjustments to his instruments.
The noise returned faintly, but it was there. Klaus pressed the receiver to his ear excitedly
“…sie dies hören, zu reagieren.Wiederholen. Oberleutant Klaus wenn sie dies hӧren, zu reagieren.” A static-laden voice, as if being transmitted over a long distance, said.
“Das ist Oberleutant Klaus, erhalte ich Ihnen.” 
“Herr? Dies ist Obergefreiter Yost  der zwӧlften Luftwaffen-Feld-Divisionen. Wir verfolgen Ihre Funksignal an dieser Stelle. Wo bist du? Ist Ihr Flugzeug intakt? Sind Sie verletzt?”
“Nein es geht mir gut. Mein Flugzeug  ist intakt. Wie wiet bist du?”
“Meine Herr, wir sind genau da, wo sie das Signal wom Ursprung ist. Können Sie uns nicht sehen?”
Klaus’ face paled visibly. “Was?” he asked back. “Ich bin in der Mitte eines Feldes!”
“Wir send in einem Wald.” The voice said slowly back before the signal suddenly vanished in a roar of static. The radio whined sympathetically before it exploded in a small shower of sparks.
“Verdammt!” Klaus yelled, scrambling away as the device failed. “Hallo! Hallo!” he yelled before throwing the transmitter away in disgust. Foolishly he had left the cockpit open yesterday, the heavy rain must have seeped in and ruined the fragile electronics in the device.
“What happened?” Twilight asked appearing over his shoulder.
“I do not know... There was a search team that was looking for me. I pick up their radio. They say they find me but I am nowhere to be found. I do not see search team, they do not see me.” He hung his head. “I do not think I am in France now. Where am I?” He said slowly, unwillingly accepting his fate.
“Do you think you could have travelled across worlds? Across different planes of existence. You came from your world into ours?” Twilight asked, an inquisitive look forming on her face. It was a long shot, but she had a possible theory.
Klaus looked at her in confusion. “I understand only some words you say.”
“Sorry, let me explain.” She levitated the scroll to her. “Let’s say you live here. Your world.” She drew a circle.
“Ja, World.” Klaus said, unsure of where was going.
“Now this is my world, where we are now.” She drew another circle. “Now what if you suddenly went from your world to ours? Like you crossed between the two worlds.”
Klaus shook his head. While what she was saying would explain what had happened, he did not understand how it could have happened.
“What make you think of this?”
“I sent a letter to my teacher last night asking if she had heard of your kind. She hadn’t so I thought that maybe you aren’t from this world. I mean, you have technology which we have nothing comparable to for one and we’ve never had any recorded contact with any creatures like yourself.” Twilight rattled off faster than a machine gun.
“But how? How could I ‘cross worlds’ as you say. I do not understand.” Klaus asked scratching his chin in confusion.
“Have you ever heard of a parallel world?” she drew a set of parallel lines when Klaus looked at her strangely.
“Parallel?” he asked. “You mean like does not meet?”
“Sort of. Now it has been thought for a long time amongst our scientists that the universe has multiple realities. She drew many other circles. “Many different worlds where things are different, but they all run at the same time.”
“I think I understand.” Klaus said. “You think where I am from is different… reality?” he asked, using the unfamiliar word.
“Yes. If we can find out how you got here, maybe we get you back home.”
“Do you really think?” 
“Maybe.”
“But this not explain how I get here.” Klaus said throwing his arms up. He crouched down on the damp ground next to Dinky. 
“You never told me how you got here. Maybe there is something there which could help us.” Twilight said, hopping down from the cockpit. 
Klaus thought back to yesterday. “I was in plane. Fliegen.” He said sticking his arms out and moving as if he was flying through the sky.
“Flying?”
“Ja, I was flying with my gruppe. I see strange lights. Lights then… I do not know word… Attackieren me. I panic when I see purple light around plane. After is black, then I am here.”
“Purple light? Describe it.”
“Ah… Light was urh… Unscharf. Like your fur. Unscharf.” He said again, rubbing Dinky’s fur.
“Fuzzy? Soft? Warm?”
“Urm… Fuzzy. I think.”
Twilight looked up with interest. “Where did it appear?”
Klaus stood up and walked over to his plane.
“It first appear here and here.” He said rubbing his hand along the tips and leading edges of the wing.
“Did you hear buzzing?”  She made a buzzing sound so he understood.
“Ja.”
“Interesting, what you seem to be describing is something we call Celestia’s Fire. We’re not exactly sure what causes it, but it can precede large storms. It usually appears around sharp objects like the lightning rod on my house. It can appear on cattle's horns and grass in particularly rare cases.”
“What does this mean?”
“Well it means that whatever brought you here has something to do with electricity.” She frowned. She paced backwards and forwards in front of Klaus talking to herself.
“Maybe some of the  energy from the lighting storm seeped through to your world? Maybe they are running much closer than we thought?” She snapped up and looked at Klaus. “When you were brought here, what was the weather like?”
He was taken aback by the strange question. “Sun. Not storm like here.”
Apparently satisfied, she resumed her pacing. “Well that seems like a possibility. Perhaps the Celestia’s fire appeared around this thing more easily as it is made of metal. Might have to test that... Maybe a lightning strike hit something here, and leaked enough power to rip through the barriers separating the worlds?” She threw her hooves up in the air and snorted in frustration. “I don’t know. It could be possible but…” She grunted and pulled an annoyed face.
Klaus looked at her with an expression of concern and confusion. “Frau Twilight, are you ok?”
“Fine Klaus. Just confused. I have a possible theory on how you got here but I need to check some books.”
“What does this mean?”
“If I’m right I can get you home. Or possibly have a bolt of lightning strike your craft and have it explode into a fiery flaming fireball.”
Klaus gulped nervously. 
“But that probably won’t happen. Maybe. Can you get this thing to fly?”
Klaus hung his head. “No.”
“Why? Is it broken?”
“No is working. Just… No fuel.” He thumped the fuel tank in the nose of the aircraft and was rewarded with a hollow thud.
“Can you get more?”
“I do not know. Maybe.” He thought for a moment. The apparent lack of industrialisation probably meant that these ponies were still to discover crude oil. He remembered from a chemistry class in his distant past that coal could somehow be liquefied and refined into diesel but immediately scrapped that idea, he had no idea how he could perform such a process. 
“What fuel do you even need?”
“Benzin… Urh… I do not know English. Fuel needs to…” He mimed an explosion. “We use… Oil I think it is. Oil or diesel.”
“We have oil. We use it for cooking."
“Es ist nicht gut genug. Is not, um… Pure enough.”
“So… you need refined oil?” Twilight asked, cocking an eyebrow.
“Ja, I think so.”
“Well we will figure something out, somehow, now if you excuse me I have a lot of books to read. Maybe I'll find something about your oil while I'm looking.” She leapt off the plane deftly, levitated her things into a bag and set off back into town.
Klaus stood there blinking for a moment before looking down at Dinky. “Is she always so… crazy?”
“Yep.” Dinky replied simply. She stared after the unicorn before returning her gaze to Klaus. “So… Mr Klaus.” She said, having trouble pronouncing his name, “Since you might be here for a while, would you like me to show you around Ponyville?” she asked timidly.
“Urh, okay.” He said, a little unwilling to leave his aircraft unattended. “One moment. I just make safe.” He clambered onto the jet and pushed the canopy down, sealing the cockpit off. He didn’t want anything else getting inside. Satisfied that his jet was as secure as he could make it, he jumped back down, landing with a squelch as he hit the damp ground. 
“Okay, Show me this Ponyville.”