> Fortunate Misfortune
>  by OutOfTheBlue
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> What's In a Name
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

When it comes to fascinating species, changelings are right near the top of the list. Black, insect-like creatures, changelings are peculiar in both diet and sociology. Changelings are the only known creature to feed off of emotional energy. This energy can be syphoned from a pony in a process we don't truly understand. Mostly harmless, if this feeding continues for too long the pony in question will feel ornery, fatigued, and sick. 

Now, in regards to their society, it's curious because it is nothing like any other sentient being's. Firstly, changelings do not use a family system. Once an egg is laid it goes to the brood mothers who tend the eggs until they hatch. After hatching, a changeling starts out as what we call a "larvea." This species is one of the only known species that undergoes an entirely new type of metamorphosis. It's entirely new because after about a week of constant feeding, the larvae or "grubs" then enter a cocoon and hatch as a nymph, a smaller, immature version of the adult changelings. They will remain a nymph for around fourteen years and many moltings until they reach adulthood.

Changelings, unlike other sentient races, do not have names. Well... most don't. All nymphs are issued a number and a letter designating them for a certain pod, or class. There are some exceptions among changelings when it comes to names. First off, they can earn one by performing exceptionally and rising through the ranks. The more important a leader among the changelings you are, the more names you can have. Most don't entirely think about their names beforehoof and just choose something they think sounds impressive. I met a high ranking officer with the name Blade Thunder Chimichanga. He had no idea what these words actually meant due to most changelings having a limited knowledge of the Equine language, but he heard those words and liked how they sounded. 

You might have noticed I mentioned that many know none to very little Equine. Well, that is because changelings have a language of their own that is more complex and sensation based than Equine. I had one of the more eloquent changelings tell me what a few Changish words would be for some Equine words and here is what he said,

Sun= bright-hot-yellow-sky-eye
Grass= soft-green-ground-fur
Pony= emotion-sad-happy-*chhrr!*

(The last word of that phrase wasn't translatable.)

The changelings raised with a full knowledge of Equine are the infiltrators. They collect emotional energy for the rest of the hive for the sake of the Queen. The Queen of the hive I'm staying in (I will not tell you its location on behalf of the personal request of the Queen) is called Queen Laphistira. She is a fascinating and kind individual. And quite beautiful if I may add. And... to be honest... I'm completely smitten with her. But enough about that, I have neglected to tell you about the second way of receiving a name.

If a changeling exhibits a trait, either positive or negative, so strongly that they become known for that one trait, they will be named after it. There are only one of these changelings a generation and here are the names and traits.

Those that are exceptionally valiant= Mandible.

Those that are sensitive and friendly= Thorax

Those that are shrewd and cunning= Gladiola

And the last trait is one that has not been exhibited in so long, it is thought to be a myth.

Those who are cursed with terrible misfortune and bring suffering and woe upon themselves and others= Misfortune.

Anyway, the Queen beckons and I must go. I hope my findings will help us learn to accept this fascinating species and maybe even to have them walk undisguised amongst us. Farewell.

--Excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust

----------------------

I yawned and stretched before lounging once more upon my bed of moss as the day began. I sighed as I realized that I had to leave my little safe zone once again. I am changeling 8/21 Gamma. Although... most call me "Misfortune." I don't try to cause accidents, they just happen! Like, before I got my name, my pod was taking a field trip to the nearby forest to observe the nearby town as part of out infiltrator training. But all of the sudden, the rock I stepped on broke through the ground and caused a small tunnel beneath us to collapse. Or the time when I tripped in one of the new tunnels and caused a cave-in. Well... then there was the time I fell from a stalactite and landed on one of the Queen's guards and accidentally broke his leg. I got punished for that.

But what I'm saying is that bad stuff just always happens to me! I haven't gone a day without something like that happening in years. Once I reached adulthood I was supposed to become an infiltrator, but my bad luck got me sent to work in the food distribution room. There, they have me perform the important task of holding a spoon in the corner without moving. Yesterday I dropped the spoon and it bounced up and landed in someone's food, causing them to choke.

But today is different. Today her radiant majesty Queen Chrysalis, the most beautiful and wise being in the world, is speaking to all of us. In person! My excitement is enough to push back the anxiety that follows me everywhere I go and give me new strength to leave the safety of my hole.

I carefully crawled out of my secluded sanctuary and made my way towards the main atrium. As I pass, changelings run away or hiss in anger. I'm used to it. When your life is a walking disaster you don't tend to be very popular. I stood near the back of the crowd as Queen Chrysalis stepped out onto the dais and cleared her throat.

"My children," she began in her melodic, wonderful voice, "We have been living in the shadows for long enough! It is time we take our rightful place as the rulers of Equestria. As we speak, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza the Princess of Love is on a train bound for Canterlot. I shall take her place and feed on her groom to be until I have the power to ensure Canterlot's defenses are useless. You will then join me and together we shall take the city and shall feed on as much love as we desire!"

Everyone cheered. This was a dream come true! We wouldn't be hungry anymore! And if Her Majesty said she could do it, she could do it. 

"Come! We make our way to our proper place in the world! My children! Follow your queen!"

As she took the air we all followed after her. The only changelings staying behind were those essential to the survival of the hive.

We exited the hive in a great cloud of black carapaces that blotted out the sun. We flew for miles before stopping for the night in a forest near the pony capital. As we slept, the Queen's personal guard, Mandible, approached her and bowed.

"My Queen, I have discovered that the changeling Misfortune has come with us. Apparently no one told him to stay. What shall I do? He can not be allowed to ruin your plans."

Chrysalis hummed before cackling.

"This actually will be a good thing. As everyone else is woken, do not wake Misfortune. We shall leave him here to fend for himself and be rid of him forever."

Mandible bowed and passed the word along.

-------------------------

I woke up as bright sunlight broke through the trees. I stood up and prepared to depart with the swarm only to find... I was alone. Fear immediately coursed through my body. I had no idea where I was and now I was alone! How could this have happened? Her perfect excellency couldn't have forgotten me! She never makes mistakes! Unless... this wasn't a mistake. Unless... this was on purpose. 

"No... H-her Majesty wouldn't leave me! W-would she!?"

Had... had I caused her so much trouble she had cast me out? Was I truly so useless that I had forced her Royal Highness to... banish me? If so... only I was to blame. I was useless. I had no purpose, no hive, no Queen. I sat down heavily on my haunches and wept bitter tears.

"F-forgive me Your Grace! I... I am unfit to even walk the same ground as you!"

I should just stay here and accept my fate. Allow the forest to consume me and serve some function. Even if it was just as food for some beast. But... I was scared. I just wanted my hole, my bed, my little refuge from my troubles. Although my instincts screamed at me to stay and either wait for the Queen to tell me what to do or perish, my fear drove me to action as I heard a rustle in the underbrush. I sprang to my hooves and dashed off away from the noise.

"I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THIS FOREST!"
> How To Survive
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The interesting thing about individual changelings is their reliance on orders. If a changeling is left alone with no orders, they will sit there until they receive orders even so long as to risk starvation or dehydration. I've only observed one changeling act differently. The changeling Gladiola built a shelter and foraged for food until we met up with him again. It appears that named changelings tend to be more individualistic than their unnamed brethren.

--excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

----------------

I ran and ran until my hooves felt like stones and my legs like jelly. Despite the pain, I carried on. It wasn't until I broke out of the forest and into the sunlight that I paused for breath. I was near a small hill and at the foot of this hill was a small pool of water with a large tree beside it. Thirsty, I slowly approached the water and took an exploratory sip. 

To compare that sip of water to the water back at the hive would be like comparing a stone to a diamond. The water back at the hive was always warm and had a peculiar taste about it because it all came trickling down through the rocks and crevices of the hive. This water was delicious. It was cool and sweet and seemed to satisfy a thirst I had never known I'd had before. I took several long draughts before my stomach began to feel full. I took a deep breath and smelled something. 

The air here... it was sweet. It was like my eyes had been opened up to something I had never experienced before. The bright sunlight warming my chitin, the gentle breeze causing the grass to ripple like water, the brilliant colors of all the plants around me. Even when I had left the hive as a nymph, I had never stopped to just look at the world around me. The hive was nothing like this. The hive was dark, cramped, and either unbearably hot or numbingly cold. 

I carefully leaned over and dipped my hoof into the water. It felt so cool and pleasant that I took a quick look around before hopping in and kneeling down so only my head remained above the surface. This was amazing! How had I never done something like this before in my life! A peculiar feeling rose in my chest and my mouth involuntarily opened in a curious way. I looked at my reflection in the water and saw that my face looked weird now. Was a mouth supposed to do that? I'd never seen another changeling like this. I heard something from over the hill and cautiously crept out of the pool and to the top of the hill, careful to stay low to avoid notice. 

Past the hill was a small... small... what was that word? Town! A pony town!... a pony town!? I quickly hid myself to avoid being spotted. I'd heard about ponies when I was a nymph. How they loved to hunt changelings and lock them in cages so they could watch us starve. How they would lash out at anything that wasn't like them and how our infiltrators risked everything to hide in their midst.

Just then, my stomach grumbled, reminding me that I hadn't eaten in at least a day. If I wanted to eat... I'd have to go to the town. And in that town there'd be... be....

"P-ponies!"

I slumped beside the water and looked at my reflection. A scared little changeling looked back. I had to turn into a pony. But... if they suspected me.... I involuntarily shivered. My stomach reminded me that it wanted food. I would have to live among the ponies to survive... most likely  permanently.

What did I know of ponies other than their dislike of changelings? They did not eat emotions. They lived in things called houses which were like miniature hives and they....

"Oh no... how am I going to do this!?"

I stood and paced before deciding that, first things first, I needed a disguise. If a pony were to come over the hill now....

I concentrated and attempted to transform. Impersonating a pony was easy, you had a living pony to mimic. But making a pony of your own was much more difficult. To be honest, I couldn't just make a pony. But, I could change up the colors and mark of a pony! I concentrated before turning into one of the ponies we had used for practice during infiltration training. 

With a flicker of greenish fire I had become a stallion with green fur and a purple mane. I concentrated again and changed the fur to... brown. I then looked around until I spotted a flower with light orange petals and decided that would do for a mane color. I kept my eyes the light blue color the pony's had been and set about coming up with a name and cutie mark.

"Let's see... what's something very pony like. Uh... Leaf? No. Stick? No. Uh..."

Looking around I saw a broken branch in the reflection of the pond.

"Broken... branch? No... I like the broken part but... wait. What was that saying or thingy about breaking stuff? It was a... table? No. Dresser? No. Mirror? YEAH! Mirror! Broken mirrors do... something. And that should be an easy cutie mark to make!"

I focused on an image of a large mirror like in the image of the house we'd had lessons on before imagining it with a large crack and a piece missing from the bottom. I then focused on that image and made it appear on my flanks. Satisfied, I looked at my reflection.

"Pupils, check. No horn or wings, check. Cutie mark, check. Fangs?" I opened my mouth and saw only smooth teeth. "Check."

I'll admit, making my own pony gave me a... confidence that I had never felt before. I could do this! I was a changeling! A creature of immense subtlety and shrewd as a serpent. I could do this!

--------------------

"I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't do thi-i-i-is.”

I was standing, shaking in place at the entrance of the town. Ponies of all shapes and sizes bustled about. My prior confidence gone and replaced with my typical anxiety laced with fear. I took a few deep breaths before slowly walking into the town. If I stood still shaking in fear for too long all of the ponies would grow suspicious. I kept my head low and avoided eye contact. I just hope that the rumors aren't true and that ponies can't smell fear.

"Carrots! Get your carrots here! Hey! You!"

I froze and looked to my left. A mare with a yellow coat and a curly orange mane waved me over. I gulped before approaching her table. She made the same face that I had made in the pond and said,

"You look like a stallion who appreciates high quality, local produce."

Was that expected?! How do I act like that? Is it the mane? I knew I should have made it green!

"Well, my carrots are grown right here in Ponyville and as fresh as can be. Try some!"

She held out a small piece of orange something. All over the table were long orange "carrots" or whatever they were. One had been cut up so she could give me some. I cautiously ate it and... what was this? This taste! Other than emotions, most of my diet had been bland. Moss for breakfast, mushrooms for lunch, tubers for dinner. The only exception was every fourth day you would receive a small fish with your dinner. But this... "carrot" had a taste I'd never tasted before.

"I can see it in your eyes you like them! So how 'bout it? Four carrots for two bits."

I swallowed my bite of carrot and gave her a confused look.

"B-bits? Bits of what."

She stared at me before saying,

"You're joking, right?"

Sweat began to bead on my forehead. Was this some code I didn't know? What were these bits she was looking for?

"Sweet Celestia you're serious. How can you not know what a bit is?!"

"I-I'm sorry! I just... tell me how I get these things and I'll give you some!"

By now some ponies had stopped to stare after her outburst. This wasn't good.

"You get a job. Honestly, where are you from to not know about bits?"

They were on to me! I needed to discreetly vanish into the crowd. I slowly backed away and attempted to blend in. The mare made a weird face and held out a hoof.

"Wait! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable! I was just curious!"

Suddenly a great rumbling sound could be heard from the left. All the ponies immediately moved to each side but I turned and saw something speeding towards me with three fillies on top. They were all screaming as the thing picked up speed and cried,

"LOOK OUT!!!"

"Oh no."

They all gasped as they saw me directly in their path. Before I could move the thing smashed into me, sending me flying down the street. I rolled along the ground before flopping on my stomach. Everything hurt... as expected.

"Owwwwww."

Unfortunately for me, the wooden monster had been upset by this and flipped over, the fillies landing safely in a nearby bush. The ponies gaped as the cart flipped end over end... before smashing down on top of me. Screams and shouts erupted from the ponies and an orange mare with a yellow mane and a cowboy hat came racing up to the fillies.

"Are y'all alright? What did ah tell you! Yuv got tah be careful when you're doin stuff like this! Y'all're just lucky nopony got hurt!"

The three fillies pointed to the cart, still in shock. The mare had missed the actual crash and as such didn't realize the panic was over the stallion that got hit. A mare from the crowd ran over to her and gasped,

"Applejack! We need you to help us flip the cart! It landed on a pony!"

Applejack gasped and galloped to the cart as fast as she could. With her help, the cart was moved and the stallion below revealed. The ponies all winced as they saw the impressive lump on his head. Applejack shook him. 

"Hey! Can ya hear me?!"

-----------------

"Hey! Can ya hear me?!"

I groaned as the shouting caused my splitting headache to get worse. I opened my eyes and winced as bright sunlight poked me with tiny spikes of pain. Sighs of relief could be heard along with various mumbles and whispers. I smelled sweet, sweet concern emanating from the crowd and instinctively syphoned some into myself. The delicous emotion would go towards healing me. I attempted to stand only for strong hooves to hold me down.

"Stay still, sugar cube. We've already sent somepony to get a stretcher. We'll have you to tha hospital faster 'n you can say 'zappapple jam.'"

Was I supposed to try to say that? My head felt weird. Kinda... soupy. Like my brain was all sticky inside and not working fast. Well, she told me to say it. And I really don't want to be found out....

"Zab...abla...gym."

My eyes focused and saw three identical mares with orange fur and a hat swaying all over the place. They all bit their lips and said,

"Uh oh. Uh... how many hooves do I got held up?"

They all raised their forelegs while continuing to wobble around madly.

"Wait... which of the three of you wants to know?"

They winced as everything continued to spin.

"That ain't a good sign."

The fillies from before nervously peaked around from behind the mares. Well... before I had only seen three, but now there were nine. The mares all looked at the fillies and scolded,

"What were you thinking! You're lucky this fellers still kickin' after a crash like that!"

Their ears drooped and the three with the bows said,

"Sorry, Applejack. We didn't mean to. We were trying to get our cutie marks in cart racing when... tha cart went outa control."

"Applejack" huffed.

"Y'all are in some serious trouble. But that'll have ta wait till he's taken care of."

Soon two ponies came running towards us with something between them. They put me on the thing and raced off. Maybe this was a good thing? Do ponies put random people on stuff to carry them around? Ah who am I kidding. I'm probably going to the cages. So long cruel world! At least you can't hurt me anymore!

As if to spite me, someone accidentally dropped a flower pot that smashed against my back. If you've never been hit by a falling flowerpot, you probably don't know how much they actually hurt. 

"Ooowwwwww."

Well, that was... I would say unexpected but to be honest it wasn't.
> A Hospitable Hospital
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

These "cages" were surprisingly... nice. I had expected... honestly I'm not sure what I expected. I have never seen a cage before. But I wasn't expecting a comfy thingamajig with beeping boxes beside it. After a small wait a pony with a hat came in. She had white fur and a pink mane done up in a bun with her cutie mark of a red doohickey with four hearts in the corners.

She made that weird face ponies kept making (and that I made once) and said,

"Hello, I'm Nurse Redheart, how are you doing today?"

"Oh, uh... good?"

She smirked (Her Majesty often did that) and said,

"No need to act tough. First off, I need to ask you some things."

Uh oh. This was where they were going to try to force me to talk!

"What's your name?"

Aha! I know this one!

"Broken Mirror."

She scribbled something on her paper.

"Hmm... alrighty then. On a scale of one to ten how bad does your injury hurt?"

Oh no! What were those things!? Those... those... numbers! Uhh....

"Five!"

She scribbled again before setting down the paper and approaching me. I shied away.... What?! I didn't know what she'd try! She paused before walking towards me slower. Before I could make a dash for it she touched my hoof. It wasn't that she held me down forcibly. She just gently held it.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm just here to help."

I didn't move as she carefully held a small bright thing and moved it back and forth across my eyes.

"Hm... seems fine so far. Okay, can you tell me where you are?"

"Uh... uh...."

She raised a hoof upon noticing my panic.

"Hey, hey... easy now. Take your time."

I gulped. This wasn't going well.

"C-cage?"

She blinked.

"What was that?"

"Uh... uh... house? Carriage? Apple!?"

She frowned before scribbling some more.

"Patient appears... confused and dazed."

She set down her papers and looked me over. After a while of looking at my eyes and other stuff she sighed,

"I don't see anything serious. So I can probably let you recover at home. I'll see about getting somepony to walk you to your house."

But... I don't have a house? What will I do! How can I convince this pony she finds that I have a house like a normal pony!?

Soon she had led me (slowly, I was still a bit wobbly) to the "lobby." It was a big room with chairs and stuff. Standing in the lobby were the carrot mare, hat pony, and the three cart fillies. (I realized now that I had been seeing more than there were because of getting hit in the head.) The assembled ponies sighed in relief before hat pony said,

"You doin alright, sugar cube?"

I assumed that was me, so I responded.

"Yes."

"Well that's ah relief. I'm mighty sorry 'bout all the trouble mah sis and her friends caused ya."

The fillies looked up at me with big eyes.

"We're sorry."

"It is fine."

That's what a pony would say, Yes?

Carrot mare returned from talking with the nurse.

"Well Mr. Broken Mirror, I guess I should help you get home now."

I nodded and the hat wearer left with the foals. I accompanied my escort out the doors and she began to talk.

"So, you new to Ponyville?"

"Y-yes?"

"Ah. Hey, I don't recall if I introduced myself but I'm Golden Harvest. But my friends all call me Carrot Top."

"I am Broken Mirror."

"Yes, I heard."

She made a weird sound before continuing the conversation.

"So... about the whole bits and job thing."

Uh oh. She was going to ask questions I couldn't answer!

"I asked a few friends of mine about it and they agreed to hire you."

To... hire me? She must have noticed my confusion because she hastily added.

"Don't worry. It's nothing too hard. The three of them run a flower shop and have been trying to start a delivery service. They need somepony to actually deliver the flowers, so that's what you'll do! Unless... you don't want to."

"N-no! No. I am very glad to do that! It's just... I'm not sure I'll do it right."

She placed a hoof on my shoulder. It was surprisingly nice to be touched, I realized from when the nurse had held my hoof and from this. Usually the only touching done at the hive was a punch to the face.

"You'll do fine. Now, where do you live?"

I looked around a bit before noticing a small house near us.

"There!"

She looked at the designated house and frowned.

"You live in that abandoned storage shed?"

"I-is that a bad thing?"

She gave me a weird look.

"Well... yeah. I mean, that really won't protect you from the elements. And it's supposed to rain tonight."

"I'm sorry."

She shook her head, her orange curls bouncing from the motion. Heh, that looked funny.

"It's not your fault. Tell you what, I'll look into finding you a place to stay and you can stay with me tonight! It's the least I can do for... kinda being the reason you got hit. I mean, if I hadn't have been so nosey you wouldn't have been in the middle of the street."

"I'm sorry."

She made a weird, happy sound. It was happy because I could smell it... and taste it... I was hungry.

"Oh you. You're almost as bad as Fluttershy."

Was that a bad thing? I'm not sure what a Fluttershy is so I'll just keep quiet. Suddenly, my stomach gave a loud gurgle accompanied by a sharp hunger pang. Carrot Top frowned.

"I guess we should get you something to eat, huh."

"I don't want to be--"

"Pssh! It's no problem. I'll have you know I make a mean carrot, cucumber and cream cheese sandwich."

She led me to her house and I realized how... pleasant it was. It looked very nice, especially the inside. She sat me down at a wooden table and I heard rattling and banging from the kitchen. She then returned with two somethings, one of which she began to eat. I picked up the other and took a tentative bite. It was... delicious! Better than the water or the carrot from earlier. I immediately hastened my eating and she made the happy sound again.

"I guess you like it!"

I nodded, a common pony gesture of agreement. After I had finished my meal, I realized how late it was. The sun was already sinking below the horizon.

"Just leave the plate. I'll show you to your room."

I followed her to a small space with a few things in it with knobs and other stuff on top, as well as a bed.

"It's nothing much, but it should be comfortable."

"Thank you. It will more than suffice."

"Well, I'll leave you to get some sleep. Big day tomorrow and I want you to be ready for it."

I nodded and sat on the bed. Huh, pictures didn't really show off how squishy it was. She walked away with a call of "goodnight!" Which I mimicked. I flopped onto the bed and layers of it became unsettled. After further investigation I discovered that these things were very soft and warm so I burrowed into the bed and made a little cocoon.

I was doing it! I had successfully infiltrated the ponies and none of them knew anything about it!

(Meanwhile)

"You might have evaded me today, but I will find you. Sleep easy, new pony. I'll track you down."

The shadowy figure laughed as she stroked her vicious pet, a map of Ponyville spread out before her. Come tomorrow she'd--

"Pinkie Pie, what did I tell you about cackling in the middle of the night!"

"To not to... sorry Mrs. Cake."

"*Sigh* goodnight Pinkie."

"Goodnight Mrs. Cake!"
> Joining the Workforce
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

One part of pony culture that the changelings have taken to with great enthusiasm is foods with sugar and desserts. They have an almost dangerous craving for the stuff that led them to literally eat the whole bag of sugar plain when I introduced it to them. Does this have something to do with their insectoid anatomy?

--excerpt from Among The Shapeless by Wanderlust.

-----------------------

I awoke to the sound of pounding on the door. I had remained unnoticed yesterday, but I couldn't let my guard down. Constant vigilance. I heard Carrot Top's muffled voice say,

"Morning! I'm about to make breakfast so if you want a shower now's the time."

"O-okay."

I have no idea what a shower is.

"Where's--"

"Down the hall, second door on the left."

"Thank you."

Well... that answers the where, but not the what. I crawled out of the bed and exited the room before walking to the aforementioned door. Inside was a room with a strange floor,  a "toilet" (ponies have personal latrines in their houses) and a... thingamajig. It was white... and hollow... and had a weird thing at the top... why must ponies make such odd contraptions!

I assumed this was a "shower" and stepped into its hollowed out centre. Nothing happened so I began looking at the various doohickeys poking out the front. Two were like small... round... things while the other looked like some sort of droopy, shiny thing with a little ball on top. I tentatively touched one of the round things before pushing it slightly to the side. It turned and water began to flow from the dangly thing. I sniffed the water before taking a little drink. Yup, still better than the water at the hive.

I next tried turning the round thing on top of the droopy part. It wouldn't budge until I accidentally pulled it up and it began to rain. I let out a startled yelp as the cool water hit my back and I sat down hard. A faint yell from Carrot Top could be heard through the door.

"You okay? What was that thump?"

"I-I'm fine! I just... bumped something!"

Carrot Top apparently was satisfied as she didn't ask more questions. I stood back up and looked longingly at the raining water. If only I could drop my disguise. I froze as I saw that a blanket like device was hanging from a large metal circle around the top of the "shower." I grabbed it and tugged it slightly, curious as to what it did. It easily slid along the circle and towards me.

"Wait! With this I can cover the entrance to the shower!"

I quickly pulled it across and let my disguise melt away. I let out a blissful sigh as the water began to drum against my chitin. I noticed the second of the round things and gently turned it too. Suddenly, the water became warm.

"Incredible! They can make water warm with a simple turn of a... thing!?"

I lifted my head and let the water run down my face and neck. I stepped closer and closer to the water until--

*slip*

*riiiiiip*

*THUD!*

The next thing I know I'm lying in the bottom of the shower completely wrapped in the covering device while the water continues to rain down. Hoofsteps pounded up the stairs and I heard the door begin to open.

"WAIT! DON'T COME IN!"

The door stopped and Carrot Top said,

"Why? What happened?! I heard this huge crash and--"

"I slipped... and grabbed the, uh...."

"Curtain?"

"Yes! But now it's all wrapped around me and--"

She sighed.

"It's fine. I'll help you--"

"No! I mean... no thank you. I can do it myself."

"You sure? It can't be easy trying to--"

"Yes! Yes, I'll be fine!"

There was a moment of silence before the door closed. I sighed in relief before using my magic to remove the curtain. Once free I donned my disguise and exited the room. Once downstairs Carrot Top looked at me before groaning.

"Horse apples. I forgot to get you a towel. I just don't do well early in--"

"I-I am sorry!"

She paused and looked at my nervous face before holding her hooves up in a placating gesture.

"I'm not mad at you for getting water everywhere! I was just saying that I... Mornings and I don't... towel...."

She sighed before flopping into a seat and starting on her breakfast. We both maintained an awkward silence  before she pointed at a plate with food on it.

"There's yours. Hope you like toast and eggs."

"Thank you."

The food was quite delicious, but the apprehension and worry radiating from Carrot Top was not.

"Carrot Top, I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable."

She jolted upright and gave an exasperated growl.

"That's what's making me feel bad! The constant apologies! I feel like you're scared of me!"

I flinched back and I felt sweat begin to form on my face. She was growing suspicious! She pointed her hoof at me before saying,

"See! That! That right there! How do you think it makes me feel to see you looking at me like I'll go feral at any moment!"

"I'm sorry!"

She slammed her head on the table.

"Stop. Saying. Sorry."

"I'm...."

Oh... I won't finish that thought. She gave me a meaningful look and said,

"Are you scared of me?"

I will not answer that because I am scared of being found out. I mean, how many ponies are there that are terrified of ponies? Probably none. And if I want to blend in, I need to be like every...pony else.

"O-of course not!"

That... wasn't as confident as I wanted.

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you're not scared of me."

I looked right into her eyes and tried to maintain eye contact as I did as asked.

"I... am not... scared... of... you."

By the end my eyes had slowly moved to avoid hers. What! It's hard to lie like that! She sighed before picking up her plate and putting it in the sink.

"I know we just met yesterday and I kinda was the reason you got hit by a cart, but I want to be your friend. So what can I do for you to not be scared of me?"

I awkwardly shuffled my hooves as I tried to think up an answer. I mean, so long as I'm a changeling who's trying to avoid being noticed, I'm not going to trust anypony.

My silence remained unbroken until Carrot Top moved to the front door.

"Fine. We'll talk about it later. Let's get you to work."

I nodded and followed along after her. I really didn't want to talk about it later, but later was better than now. 

We walked through the town as the ponies were just beginning to wake up. Carrot Top waved to several ponies who were heading in all different directions, each one busy with some thing or another. It all reminded me of the hive, except, happier. Changelings never greeted eachother or said "good morning" or even joined other changelings for their morning meal unless it was required.

After a brief walk we were standing outside a small building with stands of flowers outside. Three mares were busily arranging these flowers as Carrot Top approached them.

"Morning, girls!"

They all turned and made that face the ponies kept making.

"Good morning, Carrot."
"Hi, Carrot!"
"Hello, C-T."

She gestured at me and said,

"You remember the stallion I was talking about yesterday? Well, here he is. Meet Broken Mirror."

The three mares looked me up and down before approaching me. One with a yellowish-white coat and a striped red and light red mane held her hoof out.

"I'm Roseluck. Nice to meet you!"

Next was a light pink mare with a greenish yellow mane.

"I'm Daisy."

Finally was the darker pink mare with a yellow mane with a white flower in it. She held out her hoof and quietly said,

"Lilly."

After taking part in the pony tradition of "hoof shaking" I stood silently as Carrot Top and the three mares talked. Trying not to eavesdrop. (according to pony culture that is rude.)

Carrot Top circled the mares up and whispered,

"Quick warning, I've noticed that this guy is... accident prone. Also he seems very... well... like if Fluttershy was a stallion."

Daisy nodded.

"How many times has he apologized for no reason this morning?"

"Uh... I don't remember, but quite a bit. Also he's pretty skittish so... go easy on him, please?"

Roseluck smiled.

"No problem. Although, where does he live? This is the first I've seen him and Pinkie hasn't thrown him a party yet so I can only assume he's new in town."

"Well, with me at the moment. I'll start looking for a cheap place for him today."

Lilly piped up.

"Why not that little house that mare from Manehattan built a few years ago?"

The other mares nodded at the suggestion. For sake of reference, here's the short version of her story. A wealthy businessmare had decided to build a second house in the country to "get away from it all." When she said she wanted a little house, it was little. It had a small kitchen, one multipurpose room, and a bathroom on the first floor. The second floor was just an attic that she'd turned into a bedroom. After about three weeks she got bored of the small town and moved away. Her house never sold given nopony really needed a tiny house here. So it was now dirt cheap.

Daisy smiled at Lilly.

"Good idea, Lilly! I'm sure we can work something out so he can live there and start paying it off gradually."

"And furniture, he'll need to get everything from couches to a bed to tables to... whatever stallions like."

Carrot Top gave the three mares a questioning look.

"Why are you so eager to help out? You don't even know the guy?"

Roseluck waved a hoof dismissively.

"Well he does happen to be a mysterious stallion that drifted into town one day. It's like the start of a romance movie!"

Carrot Top blanched.

"No. Please don't play matchmaker. The last time was bad enough."

Daisy gasped.

"Bad!? How was it bad!?"

"You tried to discreetly set Thunderlane up on a date with Rainbow Dash, then with Cheerily, and finally with Twilight Sparkle! Just be glad nopony knew it was you who was sending those letters!"

Lilly blushed.

"Well, it's not like anything too bad happened."

Carrot Top raised an eyebrow.

"Okay... it was pretty bad."

"Yeah. Just... don't make him uncomfortable, okay?"

The three mares nodded.

"Good. I'll leave it to you to show him the ropes."

She then turned and walked back over to me. I'd sat down and started looking at the flowers when she said,

"Well, when you're done feel free to head back to my place. I'll be out for a bit."

"O-okay. Thank you."

She made the face again before trotting away, giving a little wave to us all as she left. I turned to the three mares and gulped.

"S-so... what is it... you need me to do?"

The mare named Roseluck gestured to a set of saddlebags that had flowers poking out the top.

"Well, I'll give you a list of houses and you'll deliver these flowers to the ponies that bought them. Don't worry, we marked the flowers with the ponies names."

I took the list... and I couldn't read. That was something taught after you completed basic infiltrator training and were ready to become the understudy of an infiltrator. But... I can compare the squiggles on the paper to the squiggles elsewhere!

They gave me the paper and I set off in search of the first squiggle. Daisy called after me,

"Be careful! Don't damage the flowers!"

I nodded and continued my search for the top name on the list.

With me no longer there, the three mares began to titter. Daisy formed a huddle and began,

"Soo... what do you think of the new stallion?"

Lilly answered,

"Well... he does seem pretty quiet. And his name is Broken Mirror...."

Roseluck sighed,

"I know. He probably has had a tragic past that he's running from. I can so see him and Carrot slowly falling for eachother. Imagine, the mare that took in the mysterious wanderer eventually breaks through his shell and convinces him to stay with her."

They all "ooh"ed before Lilly piped up.

"Or what about him with Fluttershy? They're totally kindred spirits. And they'd be such a cute couple. They'd probably snuggle by the fireplace and whisper sweet nothings to eachother. They'd live in quiet simplicity, growing old together and becoming that sweet old couple that everyone goes to for romantic advice."

"Aaaaw"s rang out from the other two. Daisy grinned before adding in her two cents.

"Or him and Rainbow Dash. Opposites attract and all that. They'd totally balance eachother out! He'd be the quiet and sensitive one while Rainbow Dash would be the fiery go-getter! He'd cheer her on at her races and then she'd--"

Roseluck held out a hoof.

"Okay. I've been ignoring it for a while now, but what is it with you and trying to set up Rainbow Dash?"

Daisy rolled her eyes.

"She's such a tomboy it would be great to see her realize her feminine side."

The other two shrugged before realizing that there was a small line of ponies waiting for them to sell them flowers. The mares groaned.

"We'll finish this later."

--------------------

I knocked on the front door of the first home on the list. It had taken a bit, but I had eventually managed to successfully compare the squiggles. Finally a pony came to the door. She was a mare with a bright, white coat and a stylish purple mane.

"Hello? You do realize you don't need to knock to come in, darling?"

I shrank back a bit, my ears flattening against my head.

"I'm sorry. I just--"

She waved me off.

"Oh, it's no problem dear. Do come in."

"But I--"

"Nonsense! I insist."

I begrudgingly followed her inside. Her home was truly massive compared to others and oddly open. She made a sweeping gesture and declared,

"Welcome to Carousel Boutique. Where everything is sleek, chic, and magnifique!"

"Uh... thank you?"

She made happy sounds quietly before saying,

"The thanks is all mine! Now then, I am Rarity. The owner of this establishment. So what is it that you want this fine day?"

I gulped before squeaking,

"I have flowers for you!"

She froze and shock began to radiate from her. She coughed awkwardly before saying,

"That's... very thoughtful of you, but I really can't accept. I mean, I don't even know you and--"

"B-but isn't your name on the list!?"

I held out the list which she picked up in her magic. Her eyes widened and her cheeks turned pink.

"Oh my. I do apologize. I completely misunderstood what you said."

"I'm sorry for not telling you."

She waved her hoof and tutted.

"Oh it's not your fault, darling. Now then, I'll be needing those flowers."

"R-right, sorry."

I opened up the saddlebags and let her float out a bundle of flowers. She hummed thoughtfully as she arranged them into a glass vase near the stairs.

"You know, you must be new to Ponyville."

"Y-yeah."

She nodded before giving me a happy look.

"Well, drop by sometime and I'll make you some nice clothes. Consider it a welcoming gift and an apology for holding you up here."

"Oh, I'm--"

"Nonsense. Now, I see that the Cakes order is next on the list. You probably don't know how to get there, do you?"

I shook my head.

"Well, allow me to escort you. I need to pick something up for my sister anyway."

I dumbly nodded, glad to not have to compare squiggles for this one. We walked down the street before entering a building that looked very... odd. But it smelled fantastic. Now, not the fantastic that emotions smelled like (I'd been taking sips from passing ponies all day) but good nonetheless.

Upon entering, a very happy mare greeted us.

"Hello, Rarity! Who's your friend?"

"Oh, he's a new pony in town. He's delivering flowers for Roseluck, Daisy, and Lilly. His name is... why, I was never introduced!"

She turned to me and I shrank back.

"Sorry."

She waved it off before saying,

"Nonsense, it's mainly my fault. So, what's your name?"

"B-broken Mirror."

Rarity nodded before leading me to  the mare from before. She nodded to me and made that weird face again.

"Hello, I'm Cupcake. So, you have my flowers? I'm making special lavender honey tea cakes with them."

I nodded before opening the bags and allowing Rarity to remove the flowers. Cupcake took the flowers before saying,

"I just made some chocolate chip cookies. You want one?"

I apprehensively nodded and she gave me a circular thing. I took a bite and... sweet delicious love! This is the best thing ever! I instantly devoured the rest of the "cookie" and licked my lips clean. Cupcake blushed and pure happiness flooded out from her.

"I take it you liked it?"

"It was fantastic!"

"Well, I think I can spare a few. For a welcoming present of course."

I eagerly took the bag she offered me and ate another of the cookies. Just the a pink blur zipped past me from behind a potted plant. The only thing I could understand was,

"BROKENMIRRORCHOCOLATEPAAAAARTYYYYYYY!!!!"

...

What?
> Life of the Party
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Changelings are quite agile, especially when startled. For example, I once observed a changeling climb a wall and perch on a stalactite when I sneezed too close to him.

--excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.
--------------------------------------

With my "job" completed for the day I began my walk back to Carrot Top's house. I would much prefer one pony to be afraid of over an entire town. Before I could reach the house though, Daisy approached me.

"Hey, Broken Mirror. Could you come over here for a sec? I really need your help."

All of my keen changeling senses told me to run away as fast as possible... but that would not be what a pony would do. Reluctantly, I followed the pink mare towards Sugarcube Corner. She entered the door and vanished into the darkness waiting beyond the doorway. I froze, suspicion pointing out that this was the perfect place to ambush a changeling. I steeled my nerves and cautiously entered the building.

"H-hello? D-Daisy?"

I continued forward until the lights turned on suddenly, revealing a large group of ponies staring at me.

"SURPRISE!"

"EEEEEEEEEK!"

I don't know how I wound up on the ceiling but I opened my eyes to find myself straddling one of the lighting fixtures. Unfortunately said fixture was very hot which burned my stomach and caused me to fall to the ground with a loud "THUD!" The ponies all winced and whispered as I tried to regain my breath. A pink pony with a curly pink mane suddenly lifted me up and began to excitedly shake me.

"WEREYOUSURPRISED!IMEAN,ITRIEDREALLYREALLYHARDTOSURPRISEYOUANDYOUSURELOOKEDSURPRISEDWHENYOUWEREONTHECEILINGBUTYOUFELLANDTHENYOUWEREONTHEFLOORBUTWEREYOUSURPRISED?!"

I could not comprehend a word that came out of her mouth. She let me go and stood on a table laden with food.

"Anywho, welcome to your 'welcome to Ponyville we're totally going to be bestest friends forever, like, better than anypony else can be your bestest friend but not better than anypony else because I'm already everyponies bestest best friend but you're important too' welcoming party!"

I gulped and began to look for an escape route. Ponies were blocking all the exits already so I'd have to--

"Anyway, LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!"

Suddenly loud music began to play, and in my panic, I dove under a nearby table... directly into the lap of a yellow pegasus. She let out a quiet yelp and I hurriedly got off of her.

"I apologize! I didn't mean to--"

"N-no no, I'm sorry for getting in your way."

"But I'm the one who ran into you. So I'm supposed to be sorry."

"But I got in your way."

"But you were here first."

...

"Sorry."
"Sorry."

We both sat in awkward silence as the party raged on outside the cloth covering of the table. I coughed slightly before asking,

"S-so... why are you under here?"

The mare curled over a bit and her mane covered her eye.

"Oh... w-well I really don't like crowds, but Pinkie really, really wanted me to come. So I figured I'd come here for a bit before heading home."

"I am the exact same as you."

Whew, not only would that cause her to trust me, it also subtly engrained in her head that I was not secretly a changeling... also it was the truth.

The mare looked me over a bit before saying,

"Um... wonderful weather we're having... right?"

My eyes darted to the ground before I attempted to satisfactorily answer.

"Uh... yes?"

This was going horribly. She adjusted her wings before saying,

"Well... I think I'll go home and make some tea. Um... goodbye?"

"Yes! I also will go home and make the tea."

She perked up a bit.

"You like tea too?"

I nervously made that face happy ponies make and replied,

"Y-yes. It is my favorite."

"Ooh! What types do you like?"

"Uh... all the types?"

She looked up a bit and thought for a while.

"Hm... well I know I like herbal. It's so relaxing to drink some while I read to my animal friends."

"That sounds wonderful.... I also enjoy that."

She gasped before growing happy.

"You like animals too?"

"Y-yes! Very much."

"Oh you just have to come by and see my critter friends. I have so many and maybe you'd like to keep one as a pet!"

I nodded. Yes, anything to escape this "party." The pegasus squeeled in delight.

"I never thought I'd meet another tea and animal enthusiast who's just as... well... not be rude or anything... quite as I am! Maybe Pinkie is right. Parties are good for meeting ponies like me."

"Y-yes... now can we go see the tea and animals... away from this party?"

Before I could say "Sweet queen what's happening" she had taken my hoof and was eagerly dragging me through the town, talking about stuff like puppies and kittens and birdys and... whatever else she was talking about. But the important thing was... I was free! And nothing bad--

*Thump*

I groaned in pain as I was dragged into a pole.

"Oh my gut!"

*Clang!*

"Oh my butt!"

(Meanwhile, back at the party.)

Pinkie hopped all over the place, searching for the guest of honor. She spotted Carrot Top talking to the three flower mares and bounced over as they talked.

"Aren't you excited! It isn't everyday that there's a royal wedding!"

"Yeah! I can't wait any longer! Even though it's just days away, it feels like forever!"

Pinkie chose then to butt in.

"Hey, has anypony seen Broken Mirror?"

Four heads shook.

"Okey-Dokey-Loki! I'll keep looking elsewhere! Have fun!"

And away she bounced.
> Shy
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I sat silently on the couch in Fluttershy's home. She'd been speaking almost nonstop the whole way, but I could smell the fear and anxiety she was attempting to mask. She definitely was trying to keep calm. Did... did she suspect me!? No... it couldn't be... a trap!? I jolted as something poked my leg. Looking down I saw... what in the queen's name?

I lifted my hoof and looked at the thing wrapping itself around said limb. It was... long, and it had no limbs. It was just a body.

"Woah, what happened to you?!"

It lifted its head and flicked its tongue at me. I leaned forward to investigate, and it moved forward and curled around my neck. I simply stared at it as it remained on my shoulders.

"Uh... make yourself comfortable?"

(Meanwhile)

Fluttershy gave herself a determined look as she stood in the bathroom. She'd set the kettle on and had some time before the water boiled.

"Okay, Fluttershy. You can do this. Pinkie said that all I need to do was be brave and I'd like talking to ponies in no time.... Oh... but talking to ponies I don't know is so scary. But, Pinkie believes in me! And I don't want to let her down!"

Fluttershy took a deep breath to calm her nerves and thought back to all that her party loving friend had told her. For clarification, Pinkie had approached Fluttershy with a request to give her a "friend making lesson" in the hopes to make her more comfortable around others. Reluctantly, Fluttershy had agreed.

"Okay, stay cool, calm, and collected. There's no reason to be nervous, he's just one pony.... One pony that might make fun of me for being a bad flyer or not having many friends!"

She shook her head and sighed.

"No, I-I can do this... for Pinkie. I'd hate to let her down."

She took another breath as the kettle began to whistle before exiting the bathroom and preparing the tea. Once it was ready, Fluttershy set the teapot and cups on a tray and carried it into the living room.

"I h-hope you like rose and--Oh! I'm so sorry! I hope he didn't scare you."

I looked up at her and then down at the thing draped across my shoulders.

"No. I do not mind. What is it?"

She set down the tray and attempted to remove said thing... but it just held on tighter.

"Oh, I-I'm so sorry about him. He's usually very shy."

"Oh... but... uh, what is he?"

She blushed and shrank back a bit.

"S-sorry! Um... he's a ball python. His name is Spaghetti. N-not because he looks like a noodle! It's because he likes hiding in... empty... spaghetti... boxes."

The last word was barely more than a squeak and she was practically lying on the floor she'd crouched down so low.

"Oh... I like him. He is nice."

She perked up a bit.

"R-really? Most ponies think snakes are icky."

"Really? But... he's kinda cute."

Spaghetti raised his head and flicked his tongue at me, obviously pleased.

"Wow, I think he's smiling!"

"Smiling?"

She shrank down a bit.

"Oh, sorry. That sounded weird, didn't it. I'm sorry. It's just...."

Quick! I need her to not hate me. Because if she hates me, she'll call her pony friends to come chase me with torches and pitchforks!

"Oh... y-yeah! I see it now... smiling."

That word was familia-- Ooooooh. Smiling. That's what that face was called! Derp! She carefully poured the tea and we sat silently as we drank it. Eventually I'd finished my tea and was ready to leave... without tipping off my host that I wasn't a pony.

"Well... this was... nice."

She silently nodded. I stepped towards the door and paused.

"Uh... do you want Spaghetti back?"

"Oh, um... I think he really likes you, so if you want to, um, keep him as a pet, uh, if you want to, then you can."

"Oh... thanks. Uh... what does he eat?"

"I'll send you some food for him. You'll only want to feed him every once in a while. He doesn't need food everyday."

"Thank you. Uh... have a good night?"

She nodded and took a sip of tea. I slowly closed the door before walking back towards--

"There you are!"

"Aaaagh!"

*Bonk!*
*Splash*

"...Whoops! Sorry, Mirror! Didn't mean to scare you!"

I picked myself up from the middle of the stream and climbed back up to the bridge where the pink pony from the party was waiting.

"Uh... do you need something?"

"Uh, yeah! I need you to follow me!"

Oh no, I already did this once and it was bad. I don't think so scary pony.

"Oh, uh... look at the time. I think I should-- Eeep!"

She grabbed my hoof and pulled me off in the direction of town. Okay, how strong was this pony!? I literally could not get free! Finally we stopped in front of a small house with Carrot Top and my bosses standing out front.

"Uh... what's going on?"

Pink jumped out in front and cheered,

"Surprise! We all chipped in and bought this house for you!"

She appeared beside me and whispered,

"Actually, Mayor Mare basically gave it to us for a tray of brownies. Apparently it cost more to upkeep than it was worth."

She then rejoined her friends and smiled at me before gesturing for me to enter. I cautiously walked through the door and gaped in surprise. The whole house was just so... pleasant. There was a squishy, squashy looking couch, a fireplace; a big, comfy chair; and a little kitchen with a small white fridge. Through a small door was a bathroom with a shower, toilet, and sink. Walking up the stairs I saw a good sized bed with a little table holding a lamp beside it. On a table by the window was a small vase of flowers. Overall, it was... nice.

"Sooooooo. Do you like it?"

I turned to the five mares and shyly smiled.

"I... I really like it. Thanks."

They all cheered before wishing me goodnight and leaving me and Spaghetti alone. Once I had locked the doors and closed the blinds I let out a breath and dropped my disguise. Words cannot express the relief I felt as I became myself again. I stretched and shivered, glad to have my chitin back rather than annoying pony fur. I felt my fangs with my tongue before buzzing my wings and allowing my aching horn to rest. I'd never had that much practice using magic before this.

"Finally. All alone. No ponies, no disguise, nothing to worry about."

I looked down at Spaghetti as he slithered down my leg and started squeezing through the holes in my hoof.

"S-stop that! It tickles!"

He raised his head and flicked his tongue before slithering up the stairs leaving me alone in the main room. I looked around before glancing at the bathroom.

"Well... a shower felt good before, how will it feel now that I’m not hiding?"

I entered the bathroom and stepped into the shower. Oh yeah, it was nice. It was then I noticed something in the bottom of the shower. Once I pressed it, the water stopped draining. Soon I could comfortably sit in the water and enjoy the warmth. Unfortunately, the water got too full and spilled all over the floor. It took a lot of towels to dry it up. Yes, I learned about towels. Changelings are masters of adaptation.

After my small adventure I decided to go to sleep. I did have to work tomorrow. I got on my bed and curled up between its layers. I glanced up at the weird squishy thing at the top of the bed and had an idea.

"Hey, Spaghetti. Do you want to sleep in this thing? I'm not using it."

Silently, my new companion slithered over and squeezed into the inner layer of said thing. I yawned before using my magic to turn out the lights.

"So far, so good. Heh, even my luck has been better. Maybe... maybe I won't mess this up like I did at the Hive. Maybe I can make this work."

Maybe I just called down a curse upon myself.
> Getting Into the Swing of Things
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Changelings are masters of deception. They can fill any role almost flawlessly, and act just like any other pony. This means that you never know who might be a changeling, given they never act out of the ordinary.

--excerpt from  Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

--------------------

Dawn rose over Ponyville in a splendid display of birdsong and gleaming dew. All the residents of said town arouse happy, eager to greet their friends, and ready to start the day. The resident changeling, however, was a different story.

"Uuuuugh. Spaghetti, help me. I need to get up, but I don't have the willpower to make myself get up."

Unfortunately Spaghetti did not come to my aid. I feebly stretched my legs before collapsing back into the warm bed. No, my warm bed. I yawned widely and murmured,

"I'll just rest my eyes for a bit."

*KNOCKKNOCKKNOCKKNOCK*

I jolted and fell out of bed, landing with a thump on the floor. I blearily looked around as I tried to get my bearings.

"Wha... what just--"

*KNOCKKNOCKKNOCKKNOCK*

"BROKEN MIRROR, GET YOUR FLANK OUT HERE!!!!"

I yelped before applying my disguise and running towards the door. I peeked out the window to see a very angry Carrot Top impatiently standing outside my front door. I gulped and cracked open the door just enough to peek out.

"H-hello?"

She somehow managed to grab my ear and pull me out the door. She gave me an absolutely scathing look.

"Why aren't you at work!? It really doesn't look good that the pony I recommended to my friends decided to play hookey today."

I blinked as I tried to discern what she had meant.

"...You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you."

I slowly shook my head before replying,

"Uh... when was I supposed to go to work? I thought I was still on time?"

"You were supposed to be there by nine at the latest! It's ten twenty!"

I shrank back, my ears folding against my head.

"Oh no. I-I'm so sorry! I-I-I--"

She held up a hoof and sighed.

"It's fine. Just be glad that you aren't going to be fired."

I don't know what being "fired" is but I don't want it. So I must get to work as soon as possible. I slammed my door and ran for the flower stand as fast as possible. Carrot Top yelled after me,

"Mirror! What are you doing!?"

"TRYING TO STOP BEING THE WORST!"

I ran pell-mell through the streets, ponies shouting and leaping out of the way as I yelled warnings ahead of me.

"WATCH OUT! I'M LATE FOR WORK!!"

I rounded the corner and saw the flower shop. I put on a burst of speed as I entered the final stretch. Only to trip over my own hooves. I rolled head over hooves, over several rocks, before landing in the well beside the store. I landed with a splash in the dark confines of my new stone prison absolutely clueless as to how I was supposed to get out. 

Suddenly, a silhouette appeared over the opening of my watery prison and Roseluck called down.

"Uh... Broken Mirror?"

"Yeah?"

"You... you okay down there? That looked pretty painful."

I shrugged and wiped the well water out of my eyes.

"Yeah, I'm used to it."

"Sheesh, you really live up to your name."

"I guess. Sorry I'm late. I'm just really bad... at everything."

"Oh, it's fine. Um... I'll go get, like, Twilight or somepony that can help get you out. You going to be okay down there?"

I adjusted my position so I was more comfortable before replying,

"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's actually kinda nice down here."

She paused before saying,

"Ooookay. I'll be going now."

I sighed before leaning back against the wall. Technically it could have been worse, but still, not fun.

I don't remember how long it was before Roseluck came back, but it felt like forever.

"Uh... bad news. Twilight just left town a bit ago, something about her brother's wedding. Anyway, I'm going to go see if Big Mac can pull you out with a rope or something. Just... hang in there."

"Okay. I can do that."

She trotted off and I resumed my wait. Honestly this was new to me. Just waiting in a well. Usually I was waiting in a corner holding a wooden spoon trying not to mess everything up. Huh... no wonder the Queen left me behind. I must have been horribly difficult to work with. Maybe if I try hard enough and--

*Thunk*

"Ooooow."

I shifted the bucket that had landed on my head and looked up at the face of Lily, who was staring at me in shock.

"Hello, Lily."

Her eyes rolled back and she fell over... right on top of me. I grunted as I attempted to move her so she wasn't crushing my disguised wings.

"By the Queen, she's heavier than I thought!"

I strained to shift her from my back to sitting beside me. With a splash she was leaning against the wall squished up in front of me. It was not nearly as almost nice as before. 

I heard a groan and saw her head lift slightly. She immediately tried to stand up only to accidentally kick me in the face.

"Ooow!"

She tried to spin around but instead just hit my face with her flank, sending my head against the wall.

"OW! Please stop doing that!"

She finally calmed down and gulped.

"W-what happened?"

I rubbed my sore face and mumbled,

"You fell down a well, directly on top of me."

Her ears flattened and she gave me a sad look.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I also didn't mean to drop a bucket on you."

"It's fine, I guess. Roseluck's going to get help."

Lily gulped.

"B-but what if she forgets about us and we're stuck here for weeks and weeks but nopony noticed AND WE STARVE AND--"

She started hyperventilating before fainting... again.

"Uh... hello? Lily?"

She simply twitched.

"Does... does this happen often?"

No response. Well this is even better. I spent a few minutes keeping her upright before she finally came to.

"Ugh... how long was I out?"

"A few minutes. Do you faint often?"

She chuckled nervously before glancing to the side.

"Hehehe... kinda."

"Oh... well this stuff happens to me a whole lot too."

She looked at me before skeptically asking,

"Getting trapped in wells?"

"Er, no. Bad stuff."

"Like?"

I bit my lip as I tried to think of a moment that wouldn't reveal that I wasn't a pony.

"Well... one time... my... friend... dared me to climb up a... tree. I fell and broke some...pony's leg and my own leg."

"Really!? That... that's awful. Did it hurt?"

I nodded.

"Yeah, it did." 

"Does your leg still hurt?"

"No. It's fine."

"Hey! Lily! Why are you down there!"

We both looked up and saw Roseluck peeking down the well. Lily sheepishly smiled.

"Well, you see...."

"She fainted."

Roseluck nodded.

"Saw Mirror down there and it startled you?"

Lily nodded.

"Yeah, I saw him fall down there and almost fainted myself. Anyway, I got Big Mac to come help out. Hold on for a second and I'll drop down the rope."

True to her word, a rope dropped down and a large, red stallion pulled Lily out. Next, the rope dropped down for me. I grabbed it and "Big Mac" began to pull me out. My head had just barely reached the top and I was about to reach up to pull myself out, when there was a snap and I was suddenly falling again. Except this time my butt rubbed against the wall the whole trip down. It hurt very much.

"Ooooww."

I heard a growl of frustration from above and Roseluck yelled,

"For Celestia's sake! How does this stuff happen to you!"

Lily looked down at me and asked,

"Are you hurt?"

"Just my butt."

"Oh... that's too bad."

Roseluck sighed.

"Big Mac, we're gonna need another rope."

------------------------

I sat down on the couch after a long day at work. After getting free from the well, I had delivered more flowers and learned how to work an alarm clock. I felt something poke me and looked down to see Spaghetti slithering over the couch.

"Hi, Spaghetti. I fell down a well and hurt my butt. What did you do?"

He flicked his tongue at me before crawling into the hole in my hoof.

"Spaghetti! That tickles! GAH! MY BUTT!"
> Salespony
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've found that changelings are affected in more ways than one by the emotions they consume. If an emotion is strong enough to overwhelm the changeling, they will devolve into a sort of shock that can take hours to recover from.

--except from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

--------------------

I screamed in surprise as an unholy sound filled my room. It was like thousands of hungry nymphs all shrieking in unison.

"What is that! Make it stop! Make it stoooop!"

I finally tracked the noise to the clock of all things. I slammed my hoof against it and it stopped. I took a moment to catch my breath before slumping to the floor. I curled up and groaned as morning drowsiness returned. My stomach grumbled, causing me to stand.

"Ugh. I need to eat. I guess I'll take a few bites as I deliver the flowers."

I flopped down the stairs and donned my disguise before heading out for the day. I immediately walked back in.

"Shower. Ponies shower, so I need to shower."

------------------------

I stood awkwardly by as Roseluck, Daisy, and Lilly threw various items into their saddlebags. Daisy turned to me as Lilly shoved baskets down into the bags.

"So sorry to force this on you, but we need to go fill this order."

Roseluck squealed as she ran by.

"Pinkie sent us a letter asking for out help setting up flowers for the reception of the ROYAL WEDDING!"

The three mares pressed together and screamed in excitement. Lilly darted over and asked,

"So you're sure you'll be fine on your own?"

I nodded.

"I... think so."

Daisy halted with a bag of soil over her back.

"Don't worry, Lilly. If anything bad happens we'll be back in like two days."

I nodded in an attempt to reassure the panicked mares.

"I am sure it will be fine. Sooo... I'm not delivering flowers?"

Roseluck ran by with a large pot on her back.

"Nope! Just run the store till we get back."

"Oh, okay have f--"

With a rush of wind, they were running out the door.

"--fun."

I stood in place for a bit as I attempted to process what had happened. Apparently... I was now in charge of the flower shop. Only problem was... I had no idea what I was doing.

"Uh... what should I do?"

I mean, it's not like I've done this before. I can't even read! How am I supposed to sell flowers? I moved behind the inside counter and stood there, waiting for a customer. I'm not saying that selling flowers should be easy, but, come on, how hard could it be?

I perked up as a pony entered the shop. I am a changeling. I am cunning, manipulative, and a master of mental warfare. I will sell more flowers than any single pony ever has. Confidence. I just ooze confidence. That confidence immediately piddled out once he made eye contact.

"H-hello. How... may I help you?"

The pony looked at me and raised an eyebrow.

"Uh... what are you doing here? Where are Roseluck, Daisy, and Lilly?"

I swallowed and mumbled,

"They're not here."

"Oh, where are they?"

I shrunk back a bit. What? He was scary!

"C-c-canterlot."

He grimaced slightly, his ears folding back a bit and discomfort radiating from him.

"Oh, uh... I guess, I'll, uh, well, are you still selling flowers or not really?"

I nodded. He looked around before pulling out some bits.

"Then I'll take... uh, a box of daisies?"

I grabbed a box and threw them at him. He barely managed to catch it before I grabbed the proffered bits and shoved him out the door.

"Byehaveagoodday!"

I slammed the door and leaned against it, glad to be out if the sights of the terrifying stallion.

"Oh sweet Queen that was awful. I hope I never have to do that again."

*knock knock*

"Uh, can I have my change?"

I hurriedly shoved the bits back out the slot.

"Okay, uh, you gave me too many... I'll just leave these here. Uh, good luck?"

I opened the door and grabbed the bits before slamming it again. I took a few calming breaths before returning to the counter.

"Okay, next one... next one will obviously be different. Not as scary."

(One hour later)

Carrot Top cheerily trotted down the street towards the flower stand. She needed thirty thistles and a pack of clovers for a recipe. She froze when she saw a large crowd spilling from inside to the outside of the shop, and they weren't happy. One mare yelled,

"Come on! What are you doing! Just sell us the flowers!"

Several ponies cheered before another yelled,

"I need a dozen roses for tonight of my mare-friend will kill me!"

"I need Lilacs for my bath!"

"If I don't get rose petals by noon I'll be very peeved!"

"Persimmons!"

Carrot Top shoved through the crowd and saw ponies leaning over the desk, frantically shouting at somepony on the ground. She craned her neck and saw--

"Mirror!?"

There, curled up on the ground shuddering in terror was Broken Mirror. Carrot Top narrowed her eyes and moved in front of him.

"Hey! If you don't get out right now, I'm warning you, you'll be sorry!"

A few tried to protest only to be cowed by Carrot Top's withering glare. Soon the shop was empty save for Carrot and Mirror. She carefully walked over to the silently sobbing stallion and sat down beside him.

"Hey... you okay?"

He took a shuddering breath before whimpering,

"I-I couldn't do it, but they kept coming and they all got so frustrated and angry at me and I-I-I just... just."

He broke down again into shuddering sobs. Carrot Top sighed before nudging his shoulder.

"Come on, you need some cake."

-----------------------

I sat in an empty daze as Carrot Top walked up to the counter to place our orders. I wasn't hungry for emotions anymore, but it had taken a toll. I hadn't intended to consume so much, but I had been overwhelmed and it had proven too much for me.

Carrot Top returned and sat beside me in the booth.

"You okay? You look a little... out of it."

I nodded, incapable of a proper response. She lapsed into silence before Mrs. Cake approached with our food. She took one look at me before sitting down on my other side, a concerned look on her face.

"Oh dear, you look dreadful. What's the matter?"

I just looked down. I still felt... imbalanced from the strength of the anger I'd consumed. Carrot Top turned to Mrs. Cake and said,

"Roseluck and the others left town and put him in charge. He wasn't prepared and... things got out of hoof. I practically had to break up a mob."

Mrs. Cake held a hoof over her mouth before placing her hoof over mine, eyes shimmering.

"Oh you poor thing. It must have been terrible, especially given your more... skittish nature. I hope this hasn't affected you too much. Ponies here are generally very kind, they just get frazzled by change is all."

I nodded, still dazed. She gave my hoof a pat before returning to the counter.

"If you need anything, just ask. Anyway, I'd better get back to work. Take care of him, Carrot Top."

Carrot nodded before digging into her carrot cake. I absently picked at mine as I started sorting through everything. Hopefully I'd feel better in the morning.
> Heart To Fries To Heart
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Recently I have managed to perform medical examinations on several changelings in the hive. Their chitin, unlike pony skin, is very thick and resilient. It has the elasticity of rubber or latex and the durability of griffonian leather. Although, unexpectedly,  it doesn’t feel like the shell of an insect. Instead it is smooth and warm, despite their more insectile appearance denoting a cold blooded nature. 

I’ve also discovered that, when disguised, changelings not only look like a pony, but also completely change the placement of not only their organs, but also their bone structure. Also, whereas their blood is green and bioluminescent naturally, when in disguise their blood will become red like a pony’s unless removed from their body for more than a couple minutes. This explains why nopony discovers them, even when they get injured. Their anatomy perfectly mimics that of a pony’s, even the blood.

— excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

Work today was going much smoother than yesterday. Mostly due to the sign, I think. Carrot Top had put a sign on the counter (which I could not read because I cannot read) and ponies would look at it, shiver, and then pick up some flowers.

They then would give me bits and leave. Carrot Top had given me a plan to follow and I was following it to perfection. Stand behind the counter and say “Hello there.” Well... that’s what she’d said, she had also given me more instructions written down for later because she needed to get to her stand. But I literally did not have to talk or look at any of the pony that came to the store other than to say “Hello there!” and that was nice.

*ring*

I looked over as another pony entered the store.

“Hello there.”

It was the pony from the hospital. I... do not remember her name.

“Good morning! Oh, you’re... Broken Mirror? Right?”

I nodded.

“So you work here now?”

I nodded.

“That’s nice. But where are the Flower Mares?”

“Canterlot.”

She frowned.

“Why are they there?”

“Wedding.”

She smiled.

“Oh how nice! I’m happy for them. Anyway....” 

She glanced at the sign and smirked.

“Carrot. Anyway, I’m glad you’re doing well. I’ll grab some petunias and get out of your mane. Have a good lunch break!”

Now it was my turn to frown.

“Lunch break? What’s a lunch break?”

She blinked in surprise before giving me a skeptical look.

“You’re kidding, right?”

I shrank back a little bit. I must not arouse suspicion! Why was I still asking questions! Stupid curiosity! What should I do! She shook her head and laughed.

“Wow, I heard you were a bit odd, but this I did not expect.”

My ears flattened and I looked down.

“Sorry.”

“Oh! No I wasn’t trying to... I’m so sorry, that came out wrong. Let me buy you lunch to make it up to you.”

“Uh... okay?”

She smiled.

“Great! Let’s go! I only have so long before I need to get back to the hospital.”

I decided the pony thing to do would be to follow so I simply nodded and followed after her. Before we left she gave me an expecting look.

“Aren’t you going to close the store?”

“Oh! Yes! I will certainly do that!”

She smirked.

“Liar. You have no idea what I’m talking about.”

My eyes widened and I nervously backed away. How did she know!? She saw right through my deception!

“Oh please, you’re an open book. It’s pretty obvious you talk all weird and stiffly when you’re lying.”

I hung my head in disappointment. A changeling that can’t even lie right. No wonder Her Majesty left me. I am an embarrassment to my kind. The mare placed her hoof on my shoulder and said,

“Don’t feel bad. It’s not a bad thing you can’t lie. If anything it’s good because it proves you aren’t used to lying to ponies. I just wouldn’t go playing poker with Big Mac if I were you.”

She gave me a smile before flipping a white thing on the door of the store and gesturing for me to follow.

“Now then, where should we go for lunch?”

I shrugged.

“I don’t really know my way around here so how should I know?”

“Well, do you want anything in particular for lunch?”

I stared blankly at her. I mean, want something to eat? You just ate what was provided.

“Uh... I’ll take that as a no. I guess I’ll choose.”

I trotted absently along beside her as we made our way down the street. Many ponies waved to her... or me I guess. I’m not exactly sure how you tell. Eventually she stopped at a small building with heavenly smells wafting out the door.

“This look good to you?”

I simply nodded. Words did not describe how good the smell was. I had truly never smelled something quiet like it before. She giggled,

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

“Yeah. It smells amazing.”

“You bet it does. This place has the best hay fries in town. Uh... just don’t tell anypony I was eating junk food. I’m technically on a diet plan with my fellow nurses. Whoever loses buys the rest ice cream sundaes.... I’m now realizing how backwards that is.”

I slowly turned to give her a confused look. She blushed and shrugged.

“Sorry, I’m babbling, aren’t I?”

“I... don’t know.”

A pony escorted us to a table outside the building and left us with two odd books filled with pictures and words. Nurse mare sighed and shook her head.

“Being a nurse really kills your social life. I’m so busy all the time I almost never get the chance to just... hang out. I guess that’s why I was so eager to invite you to lunch with me! Well, that and nopony really knows much about you.”

“Uhhu.”

“So... tell me about yourself. Where are you from?”

My eyes widened as everything came to a screeching halt. I had to be cautious. One wrong answer could spell disaster for me!

“Uhhh... I’m from... not... here.”

She snorted,

“No duh, smart alek. I meant more like what town you’re from.”

“Uuuuh....”

I swept my eyes across my surroundings as sweat beaded my forehead. Stupid pony body with its stupid sweat. My eyes locked onto the dirt road.

“Dirt. I’m from the town called Dirt.”

She raised an eyebrow as I met her eyes.

“Dirt? You’re from... Dirt.”

I did my best to smile and look natural.

“Mirror, Mirror, Mirror... what did I already tell you?”

I looked anywhere but her face.

“Uh... this place has good fries?”

“Mirror, you stink at lying.”

I felt the wind leave me immediately, as well as all hope. I was doomed. She would find out and then I was doomed.

“Mirror, you don’t have to lie to ponies. If you don’t want to tell somepony something just say so. I mean, yeah I’m really curious now, but I can also tell that’s a sore spot with you.”

I looked up, confused to my core, when she laughed.

“And it’s not like I expect you to spill your deepest, darkest secrets with me. I mean, we’re just now becoming friends. Also... you don’t even remember my name.”

“...Sorry.”

She smiled and shrugged.

“It’s fine. And... it’s Redheart by the way.”

“Sorry... Redheart.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Oh sheesh, they were right. You and Fluttershy are scary similar. Whatever, just don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. Nopony in Ponyville has the right to demand personal knowledge you aren’t willing to share. We only want to be your friends. Maybe you could try trusting us enough to let us. If you want to that is.”

I felt my spirits rise at that. Friends.
They all... just wanted to be friends. Maybe... maybe I can give that a try. Maybe... I can trust them just a teeny bit. I mean, it can’t hurt can it?

“May I take your order?”

We both jumped as the pony from before appeared at our table. Redheart let out a shaky breath.

“Celestia... don’t scare me like that.”

He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly and blushed.

“Sorry... I’m new.”

Redheart waved it off,

“It’s fine. I’ll have the signature fries please.”

I looked from the pony to my book.

“Uh... I’ll have that too.”

He nodded and trotted off. I looked at Redheart and nervously asked,

“So... did you really mean that? We’re... friends?”

“Well... I want to be. A certain party pony always talks about how everypony in town is her friend, so why can’t the same be true for all of us.”

The stallion came back and placed baskets of steaming deliciousness before us before walking away again. I almost fainted when I tasted the greasy glory as it glided down my gullet. This was... good. I liked this... ‘friend’ thing.

*splash*

I yelped in surprise as icy water began to run down my back.

“Oh my Celestia! I’m so sorry! I’ll go get some towels.”

The fry stallion ran off leaving my soaked and Redheart devolving into a laughing fit. She gasped and said,

“I-I’m sorry for laughing! It’s just... how does this stuff happen to you every day!”

I gave a small smile as an ice cube fell from my head.

“I’m just special I guess.”
> Breaking News
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Despite not being the biological mother of every changeling in the hive, all changelings will refer to the queen as “Mother.” Changelings don’t have any other family association other than this which leads me to believe it holds a deeper significance in their culture than in pony culture. Once more, I find their bizarre lifestyle truly fascinating.

— Excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

The next day went by much the same as the other, with me standing behind the counter while ponies gave me bits. Many of them seemed surprised about something, but I wasn’t sure what it was.

So far I’d only had one problem today and it was minor. I’d accidentally backed into a shelf and been buried by bags of dirt. But do not worry, the next customer helped dig me out... after an hour. On the bright side I got to take a nap.

*ring*

I turned from the plant I was helping (I was ensuring not to forget the flowers I had been told not to forget. Although why some flowers apparently demand you to “forget-me-not” is beyond me) to see Redheart entering the store.

“Mirror? You in here?”

I perked up and replied,

“Yes, I am in here! Hello!”

“Hi... uh... why are you working today?”

I gave her a blank stare.

“Uh... because I’m supposed to? Right?”

“Not really. I’m pretty sure everything is closed due to the wedding.”

“...Wedding?”

She laughed,

“For Celestia’s sake Mirror, do you live under a rock?!”

“...No, I live in a house. Why do you ask?”

Redheart shook her head and smiled.

“Of all the ponies I could be friends with why in Equestria did I choose such a weirdo. Anyway, today’s the day of the big royal wedding between Shining Armor and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. The whole country is either there or listening to the radio broadcast.”

Wait... why did that sound familiar? I’m sure I’d heard of that before. I jumped when Redheart poked my nose.

“Hey, Mirror. You in there?”

I rubbed my nose and frowned.

“Where would I be other than in my body?”

“You looked like you were up in space somewhere. Anyway, me and a few friends are going to listen to the broadcast over tea and cookies. Wanna come with?”

“Uh... sure?”

She smiled.

“Come on then, it’s almost time for the wedding to start!”

As I followed her through the town full of excited ponies I couldn’t rid myself of the feeling that I’d heard about the wedding somewhere before this, but where?

Soon we were walking up a small path through a lawn towards one of the colorful houses in town. Upon opening the door I saw two mares I didn’t recognize sitting on a couch. One was a bluish colored earth pony with a green mane whose cutie mark was the same thingamajig as Redheart’s, except without the hearts. The other was a light yellow pegasus with a red mane and tale. Her cutie mark was some red fruit thing. Redheart smiled and said,

“Hey girls, this is my new friend Broken Mirror. Broken Mirror, these are my friends Tenderheart and Strawberry Sunrise. I hope you guys don’t mind that I invited him. He was going to work through the wedding, but I convinced him to play hooky.”

The earth pony giggled while the pegasus gave me a bright smile and said,

“Oh, it’s nice to finally meet you! Redheart has been talking about you and how you’re so out there.”

Redheart gasped and her face grew flushed,

“S-Strawberry! You really need a filter!”

She shrugged.

“Why?”

“Because sometimes you shouldn’t say everything you think!”

“Oh please.” She looked at me and asked, “You don’t mind, do you?”

“Uh... no?”

She smiled,

“See, no problem here.”

Redheart sighed and shook her head before gesturing for me to sit on the other end of the couch.

“It’d be a problem for anypony else, but Mirror is impossible to offend. I tell you, if all stallions were as easygoing as he is I wouldn’t be single.”

Strawberry Sunrise “oohed” and gave Redheart and I a mischievous look.

“So maybe the royal wedding won’t be the only wedding I’m interested in. Let me be your best mare, okay?”

Redheart froze and a look of deep confusion appeared on her face before she blushed and yelled,

“STRAWBERRY! ME AND MIRROR ARE JUST FRIENDS THAT’S ALL! Besides, I want a stallion with a little muscle on him! Not a stick... pony....”

She slowly looked over at me, completely mortified.

“Oh Celestia, I’m sorry Mirror. I didn’t mean to say something like that! I meant nothing by it! You’re... handsome in your own... nerdy kind of way.”

I shrugged.

“To be honest, I don’t actually understand what you meant.”

Redheart sheepishly smiled and turned to Strawberry,

“Uh, Strawberry? Where’s all the food?”

Strawberry tapped her hoof on her chin before smiling.

“Oh yeah! It’s still in the kitchen. Want to help me get it all ready?”

Carrot nodded and followed her into the next room, leaving me alone with Tenderheart. Without the semi-familiar presence of Redheart there I grew a bit nervous. Well... a bit more nervous. Tenderheart smiled and spoke in a soft, quiet voice that instantly helped me feel more at ease.

“It’s nice to meet you, Broken Mirror. As Redheart said, I’m Nurse Tenderheart. I work with Redheart at Ponyville General Hospital. How are you liking Ponyville so far?”

I gulped and replied,

“Well... it’s nice, I guess.”

She smiled,

“That’s nice. I’m happy such a kind stallion is friends with Redheart. To be honest, she needs to get out more. She’s always so preoccupied with her work that she almost never just relaxes and hangs out with somepony. Especially given her... disastrous hoof-full of dates she’s gone on. So I’m glad you’re taking the chance to get to know her.”

I nodded and tried to smile.

“Well... it’s more that she... decided that we’d be friends.”

Tenderheart looked surprised before shrugging.

“To be honest, I can kinda see why. There’s something about you....”

Something about me? Was I naturally likable to these ponies? Did they find me desirable for companionship?! Am I... “cool”!?!

“I guess it’s because you’re so harmless and dopey acting it’s impossible to be afraid of you.”

...Or that.

“It’s not a bad thing.”

“Huh?”

She smiled and said,

“Being harmless and approachable isn’t a bad thing, despite what some ponies might say. Sometimes you just need somepony you can feel safe around.”

I averted my eyes and sighed. Now that she mentioned it, I kinda wish I knew someone like that. I wish I didn’t feel so nervous all the time. Even around my “friends” I could never let my guard down or I’d risk discovery. I just now realized that I wanted someone I could feel safe around, but I’d never have that... because I’m a changeling.

With a clatter of plates and cups Redheart and Strawberry returned with a tray of tea and a tray of sandwiches and cookies.

“Alright everypony, lunch is served. Tenderheart, could you turn on the radio.”

She nodded as the two mares set down the trays and went about getting food for themselves. Suddenly, Strawberry gasped and ran to the kitchen. She returned with an odly colored jar and a weird stick thing. Redheart glanced at her in confusion.

“Uh... why do you need a scented candle?”

Strawberry shrugged.

“So that the room smells good. This is a big deal after all.”

Redheart rolled her eyes and Tenderheart giggled. Strawberry used the stick thing to light the jar on fire before eating three cookies at once. Tenderheart poked the pegasus in the side and said,

“Keep eating like that and you’ll look as round as a strawberry.”

She scoffed before eating three more and saying, through a full mouth,

“Oh *smack* please. You know I love *gulp* strawberry shortbread cookies. Besides, mares with fuller figures are what’s hot this year. They’re calling it an ‘hourglass figure.’ I read that all those slim Canterlot models are switching to some special high-carb diet to get it. So I’m actually a trendsetter. What do you think, Mirror?”

I blinked and stared at her, completely lost.

“Think what?”

“Do you like skinny mares or mares that are a little plumper.”

...what in Mother’s name?

“Why are you asking him!?” Redheart cried,” I thought you were saying that’s what the magazine said was attractive!”

“Well yeah, but what a magazine says and what stallions actually think can be totally different. So I figured we’d ask an actual stallion what he thinks. So go on, Mirror. Skinny or ‘hourglass?’”

“Uh... I don’t really know. I’m still trying to figure out what you mean by ‘hourglass.’”

Strawberry hummed before looking at Tenderheart.

“Tenderheart, be a dear and stand up for me.”

The nurse did so, albeit with a questing glance towards her friend. Strawberry nodded and said,

“Now you stand beside her, Redheart.”

“What? Why me!”

“Because Tenderheart is thin and you’re—“

“I AM NOT FAT!”

“...I was going to say ‘full-bodied.’ Anyway, just do it.”

Redheart stood before saying,

“Okay, so why are we—“

“Alright, Mirror, who’s cuter.”

The room went dead silent. Redheart slowly turned to give Strawberry a death glare while Tenderheart started blushing profusely. Even with my limited knowledge, I could tell that—

“THIS IS A TRAP!”

I lept into the air and made a mad dash for the door, only to run headfirst into it. I slumped to floor, seeing stars.

“Mirror! Are you okay?”

I shook my head to clear out the stars and replied,

“Yeah, I’m—“

*BONK!*

“...I’ve been meaning to fix that shelf.”

———————————

As the broadcast started I absently munched on a cookie while holding the ice pack I’d been given on the lump on my head. Tenderheart asked,

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

I nodded.

“Yeah, I get hit in the head all the time.”

“Really?”

Redheart nodded.

“Yeah, so far I’ve seen him get water dumped all over him, get hit by cart and then have the cart land on him, and I saw him face plant more than a few times. And word around town is that even more stuff than that has happened to him.”

My ears flattened and I said,

“Wait, you saw me face plant? How many times?”

“Uh... like three times? Why? How many times have you bitten it since you’ve been in town?”

“...Twenty-seven times. Mainly in my own home.”

They all stared at me before Tenderheart asked,

“Mirror... do you, like, have vertigo? Or have you recently had a concussion?”

“Uh... I don’t think so.”

She turned to Redheart and said,

“You checked him out after the cart incident, correct?”

“Yeah. Why do you ask?”

“Did you run any scans while he was there?”

“No, but I did check for physical signs of a concussion and he didn’t show any.”

Tenderheart hummed before asking me,

“When was your last checkup?”

“...What’s a checkup?”

Once again, they all just stared at me before Redheart said,

“Okay, I’m going to schedule you a checkup for, like, two days from now. I have an opening then. I’ll come pick you up for it before work.”

“Okay... but what’s a checkup?”

Strawberry waved her hoof and said,

“Not now! It’s starting!”

We fell silent as a voice came out of a strange wooden box.

”Welcome and hello to all our listeners across this wonderful country we call home. Today is an extra special day and you don’t need me to tell you why. I’m your host Alto Breeze here to bring you coverage of the wedding between Shining Armor and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. Now, let’s get this show on the road.”

“Here comes the royal bride herself in a truly stunning gown. Somepony get me the name of that shop because that dress is to die for! Oh! And now Princess Celestia herself is preparing to perform the ceremony.”

“My little ponies, we gather here today for the joyous binding of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza To Shining Armor in holy matrimony. Shining Armor, do you promise to love and cherish your bride, in sickness or in health, till death do you part?”

“I do.”

“And you, Princess. Do you promise to honor and—“

“I do.”

Murmurs broke out as Alto Breeze said,

“I don’t know if it’s romantic or a bit rude to cut off Princess Celestia like that. But what can you expect with these star-crossed lovers.”

Celestia cleared her throat before continuing.

“Well then, unless there are any objections, I now—“

“STOP THE WEDDING!”

Gasps erupted and Alto said,

“In a surprise turn of events, Twilight Sparkle, the sister of Shining Armor has interrupted the wedding and... wait, I can’t believe it! Two Princesses?! What in Equestria is going on here!”

“That Princess is a fake who trapped the real Princess below Canterlot!”

The rest was drowned out by the gasps and shouts of ponies until Alto scream,

“What in Equestria are those!?”

Familiar cackling drowned out everything else as a certain voice yelled,

“COME MY CHILDREN! FEED ON THE LOVE OF THESE PONIES! FEED!!!!”

More screams and shattering filled the air as Alto yelled,

“W-what are these things! They’re everywhere! Help! Somepony help!”

*Scrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

We all sat there in varying degrees of shock and horror as static filled the air. The three mares nervously started talking as I stared blankly at the radio. A feeling of creeping dread filling me slowly. But why? I remembered now, the invasion. This was a good thing, right? I... I should be happy. But why am I so scared? Why do I feel like this is... wrong!? And... for all I knew, the changelings wouldn’t hesitate to attack me too. I was an outcast now.

“Oh Celestia, what’s happening!?”

The panicked voices of the mares snapped me out of my shock as the three mares huddled around the radio nervously switching the stations. Finally they happened upon one where a stallion was saying,

“I-I don’t believe it! Canterlot is being invaded by some sort of bug monsters! For all we know they could be invading elsewhere too! Ponies of Equestria, I’m telling you now. Stay inside, lock your doors, and hide. For all we know this could be a full invasion of the entire country.”

“Oh Tartarus! What’s happening! Are they in Ponyville too!?”

Redheart gulped,

“I don’t know, but we should probably hide. Tenderheart, close the blinds. Strawberry get some food down to the basement. I’ll bring the radio down so we can stay informed. Mirror, lock the doors.”

Suddenly there was frenzied knocking on the door. We all froze as the knocking persisted before the knob turned and the door creaked open. As the mares froze in terror I gulped and made a split second decision. They... they thought of me as a friend, and... they liked me. And I... I realized liked them too. They gave me a house and a job and a Spaghetti. I had never had friends before, but now... these ponies wanted me around. They knew about my bad luck, yet instead of avoiding me they tried to help.

I moved without thinking as the door opened. Before the mares could react I threw myself in front of them and lowered myself into a fighting stance. I was so scared, b-but I had to do something. I had only the most basic combat training given to infiltrators but still, if they wanted my... friends... they’d have to go through me.

“S-stay where you are! I’m warning you! If you want to hurt my f-friends you’ll have to go through me!”

The door stopped before a feminine voice called out,

“S-so you’ve heard what was happening? I-It’s me, Cloudchaser. I’m helping Flitter make sure everypony knows to stay inside and hide. Just... go hide somewhere. Lock your door and hide. T-the weather team is going to tell everypony when to stop hiding too. Just... I’ve got to go! Stay safe!”

With that the door closed and I sprang forward to lock it. Once it was locked my knees wobbled before I collapsed onto the floor fighting back tears.

“Oh Queens... that... that was scary.”

“M-Mirror.”

I turned to look the mares as I wiped my eyes. They were all staring at me with appreciation in their eyes. Strawberry smiled and said,

“That... that was the bravest thing anypony has ever done for me. Thank you. Now come on, let’s go hide in the basement. We’ll leave this to the Royal Guard and Elements of Harmony.”

We all hurriedly locked down the house before heading to the basement which Redheart had light with candles and set out cushions for us to sit on. As we nervously listened to the radio the others moved their cushions closer together so they could hold hooves for support. I flinched when Redheart tapped my hoof.

“Huh?”

She didn’t say a word, she simply held out her hoof in invitation. I held back for a second before slowly accepting the invitation. Soon Tenderheart had moved to take my other hoof leaving us in a close circle around the small radio. We stayed that way for what felt like hours with the mares occasionally expressing their confidence in the Princesses. But I knew otherwise.

Mother was infallible. There was no way she could fail. I had picked the losing side, but... I wasn’t going to turn on my friends with me, or even the others not here. Carrot Top, Fluttershy, the flower mares; they’d all been so kind to me, but there was no hope for them. It was—

“Wait! Listen!”

We all snapped to attention as Strawberry gently turned the dial.

*Skrrrrr* This just *fzzzzzzzz* the invasion is over! The monsters have been expelled from Canterlot. Reports say that the wedding was their only target. However, it has been revealed that these monsters are shapeshifters. We do not know where they will wind up, so be suspicious of anypony acting strangely. We hope to have guards with spells arriving to check for changelings until then, stick together. Other than that, we’re safe. We won!”

The mares erupted into cheers as I stared at the radio in shock. Her Majesty... lost?! How was this possible? Were... were the Princesses superior to Mother?! This... didn’t make any sense.

“Hey Mirror! Were you paying attention?”

I nodded, completely numb.

“Isn’t it wonderful! We’re safe!”

I helped them clean up the basement before we all went outside to where the rest of the town was celebrating. We joined Carrot Top and a few other ponies in front of Town Hall where the mayor was gathering everyone. She cleared her throat before announcing,

“Everypony! As was requested by the Royal Guard, please use the buddy system until defensive measures are established. We don’t know how long that will take, but until then we are in a state of emergency. Stay safe, and don’t let this setback ruin a perfectly good celebration of the marriage of a princess.”

Everyone cheered and began to split into groups. I absently nodded when Carrot Top proposed I stay with her until the all clear was given. I was still numb from the news of the defeat my hi... former hive had experienced. And I couldn’t help but wonder, how was I going to stay hidden now?
> Aftermath
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I recently had the opportunity to secretly meet some of the changelings designated as an “infiltrator.” I have observed that the time spent among ponykind has changed them drastically. They are very self-sufficient and choose names for themselves. Some also claim to have close friendships with ponies and some even become romantically involved. I also was told by one that he was married to a pony and had three children. It turns out that changelings have been living amongst us and intermarrying with ponies for centuries.

—Excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

——————————————

“Today I watered the flowers. At first I had been unsure if I liked flowers, but they have grown on me. Not literally of course, but I guess that also would be cool. The ponies in town have been very nervous since the invasion, and have been very suspicious of anyone new who shows up. Carrot Top and Redheart told me a group of ponies almost tackled the mares known as the ‘Elements of Harmony’ when they left the train station without letting themselves be questioned. All in all, it isn’t a great time to be a changeling.”

“I have to be extremely on guard now, one slip up and the ponies will jump on me and lock me up. Changelings aren’t a big secret anymore. I heard from Carrot and Redheart that more and more changelings are being captured every day. Fortunately for me I have been in town since before the wedding, so the ponies hopefully won’t suspect me.”

“Today I also learned that I get these things called ‘bits’ because I have a job, and that I can give them to ponies for food at stores. I bought cheese and peanut butter. They are very tasty.”

“I also discovered that Spaghetti has been eating the mice that live in my house. That is fine with me because I don’t think mice are as tasty as cheese is. Umm... I don’t know what else to say, so I’ll just stop here.”

I waited for something to happen as I stared at the book in front of me. Carrot Top had claimed that “journaling” ,or telling stuff to a book, is a fun and helpful thing to do. I don’t know why talking to a book would be helpful, but I was willing to try it. I shrugged before standing and heading towards the bathroom. It was time for me to fall asleep in the bath before going to bed.

(Tomorrow)

My legs shook as I stood on top of a box so I could reach the top shelf. I needed to store all the pots up here, but I couldn’t reach it without the box. I was on my last pot and was about to put it on the shelf when Redheart walked in.

“Hey, Mirror!”

“GYAAAH!”
*Bump*
*Smash*

Redheart hurried over and helped me back up. She gave me a concerned look as she brushed pot fragments off of me.

“You okay? I didn’t mean to startle you.”

I shook my head and let my eyes realign.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Having a pot land on your head hurts less than you’d think. Why are you here?”

She smiled,

“I’m here to get you for your checkup. You remember that I said I’d pick you up for it, right?”

I scratched my head and tried to remember.

“Uh... I think so? It was before the wedding, right?”

She nodded.

“Yep. Now let’s go, we can get lunch after. How does a hayburger sound?”

“Okay. I’ll have to close the shop first.”

She gave me a confused look.

“Aren’t the flower mares back?”

“Yeah, but they were a little on edge after the wedding and took the day off. Well... more than a day actually.”

Redheart sighed,

“I can’t blame them. Imagine if you had had to be around those gross changelings in Canterlot.”

Don’t take it personally... don’t take it personally... don’t open your mouth.

“Aretheyreallythatgross.”

I slapped a hoof over my mouth and my face heated up. Redheart raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

I coughed,

“Well... I, uh, saw a picture in the paper, and, uh, they don’t seem... that... nasty?”

I sheepishly grinned as Redheart shook her head.

“Really? Well, I guess I should expect that from somepony with a snake for a pet, but a massive bug that eats your love? Pretty gross in my book.” 

“Well... maybe they aren’t... all that bad?”

Why am I still talking! I should just shut up!

“Why are you defending them?”

My eyes widened and sweat beaded on my neck.

“I’m not! I’m just... saying that... maybe some... aren’t... evil?”

“Why would you say that? They attacked Canterlot, kidnapped a princess, and tried to enslave us all!”

Just stop talking me! Let it go!

“But, you know, maybe some actually like ponies? Maybe they live with us and are friendly?”

“So kidnapping an innocent pony and replacing them so you can steal the love of their friends and families is friendly to you?”

“No! But, maybe they don’t always do that?”

She shook her head.

“Mirror, it’s sweet that you’re trying to see the nice in... those things, but they’re nothing more than evil monsters. The Royal Guard told us that much. So rather than trying to pretend their just like us, we need to keep an eye out for anypony acting weird so we can bring them to the Guard.”

I sighed.

“Okay.”

I don’t know why I was upset about that, but I was. I mean, of course ponies hate changelings. I’ve known that for a while. I should just keep my head down and survive. Redheart sighed,

“I’m sorry, Mirror. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. It’s just... I don’t want you or any of my friends to get hurt by creatures that pretend to be the ponies you care about. How about we just forget about this, okay?”

“Yeah... okay.”

It was about halfway to the hospital before we started talking again. I could tell she hadn’t been trying to upset me. She was just worried. But... so was I, although for different reasons.

Upon reaching the hospital Redheart “checked me in” by talking to a pony at the desk before leading me to a room with a bed in it.

“Have a seat.”

I sat on the bed and Redheart walked over with a clipboard in her mouth. She sat on a stool and moved the clipboard to her hoof.

“So, before I start, do you have any pains or concerns you want to tell me about?”

I shook my head. She scribbled something before grabbed a weird thing. She clicked a button and a light came on before she stuck it in my ears. She hummed and said,

“Looks normal. Shockingly normal too. How do you keep them so clean?”

“Uh... I dunno.”

“Hmm.”

She then pressed something very cold against my back.

“YeEAH!”

Redheart snorted.

“Oh please, it’s not that cold. Now, breath in.”

*huUU*

“And out.”

*HUuu.*

She then did the same thing but on my barrel.

“Alright, sounds good. Now, let’s check your blood pressure.”

She then stuck some thing around my foreleg and pumped a balloon. It went *pssssssh* and she hummed.

“Huh, your blood pressure is a bit low, but not dangerously low. Now hop onto the scale so I can check your weight. Although, fair warning, I’m pretty sure you could stand to gain a few pounds.”

I stood on some thing as she moved small pieces around. She stared at them for a bit before tapping them.

“That can’t be right. Get off.”

I did and she stepped on. She messed with the things again before giving me a startled look.

“Mirror. We’re getting you a double cheeseburger with a large fry when we get lunch.”

She sat me back down before grabbing a few little things. She tied a thing above my joint and rubbed it with some weird smelling cloth.

“You’ll feel a little pinch.”

“OW!”

I yelped as she stabbed me with the thing. Soon she took it out and set it aside.

“Alright, I’ll be back in a second.”

A second turned out to be much more than that because I was waiting for a while. A few minutes later Redheart returned with her emotions odly messed up. She locked the door and gave me a lopsided smile.

“H-hey, Mirror. Good news. Y... your test came back very... very good. I just need to run o-one more test. Now, lie down.”

“Redheart, are you feeling okay? You look a little... sweaty.”

She gulped and smiled as sweat dripped from her muzzle.

“Yeah, fine. Just lie down.”

I shrugged and complied. She slowly and shakily approached the bed before putting straps over my chest. 

“Uh... what kind of test is thi—“

She suddenly pounced on me and held one of those sharp things, except way bigger, in front of my face.

“Alright, changeling. Where’s the real Mirror?”

I went pale and stuttered,

“Wh-a-wh-a-what?!”

She moved the thing closer.

“Spill it! I know you’re a changeling! And I want to know where my friend is!”

How, how could she have known?! I have to play it off!

“I... I’m not a changeling! Why would you think that?!”

She snorted.

“I was waiting for the magical scanner we use to perform blood tests, and something happened to your sample. Last I checked ponies don’t have glowing green blood.”

Oh no. I gulped and my eye twitched.

“W-wha? Psh...  that... that’s normal. I mean, for... me?”

She scowled.

“Drop the disguise and stop acting like my friend! Or else I’ll be turning you into the Guard with a lot more puncture wounds.”

“I don’t know—OW!”

She pulled out the needle and barked,

“I’m losing my patience. I’m sure the Guard would be happy to get the information a more forceful way.”

“Stop! I’m—OW— begging you!”

“Transform you monster!”

“Okay! Okay! Just stop hurting me!”

With a flash of green my true form was revealed. What! I have a low tolerance for pain! Redheart gasped as she saw me. I took my chance.

“Redheart, please! I know this is... weird, but please! Don’t turn me in!”

She growled.

“And why would I do that?”

“Because I am Broken Mirror! Seriously!”

She laughed.

“Yeah right. You have to have a pony to transform into, that’s what we were told.”

“Well, yeah, but it’s easy to change the fur and mane. Please, you have to believe me! I can prove it! Just ask me something only I’d know!”

She bit her lip before sighing.

“I don’t know why I’m bothering, but you’re restrained, so fine. What was the first meal we ate together?”

“Hay fries!”

She tapped her chin and said,

“Alright, lucky guess. Why did you first meet me?”

“I got hit by a cart!”

Her scowl slowly relaxed to a look of confusion.

“What... what did you say to the pony who knocked on the door during the invasion?”

I gulped.

“If you want to hurt my friends, you’ll have to go through me.”

She sat back and stared at me blankly.

“Mirror... I... I don’t understand. It’s obviously you... or... who I knew as Mirror, but... have you been... the whole time?”

“I can explain everything, please. I’m still your... friend. Right?”

We stared into eachother’s eyes as I asked,

“We... are friends? Right, Redheart?”

She looked away and groaned.

“I don’t know why I’m trusting you, but....”

She released the bindings and pointed at me.

“You’re explaining everything at my house later. You can either run away and I’ll tell the Guard, or you convince me not to tell, deal?”

I nodded.

“Deal.”

She growled and stomped off.

“This might just be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done!”
> Answers
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have still found no scientific benefit as to why changelings, on average, are smaller than ponies. If observered in their true form, a changeling of average size will be a few inches shorter in both length and height. Does it help increase stealth? Does it help them survive in the desert? The world will never know.

-excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.
——————————————-

I nervously stared at Redheart’s door. I’d been standing here trying to work up the courage to knock for some time, but still hadn’t.

“M-maybe I should just pretend I forgot. No, then she’ll tell the Royal Guard... whoever that is. I could... uh... oh queens I don’t know what to do!”

I groaned and slammed my head against the door.

“...Why did I do that?”

Apparently Redheart heard the sound because moments later she opened the door.

“Oh... you actually showed up.”

I nodded and scuffed my hoof against the ground.

“Well... yeah.”

“Come in, I guess.”

I followed her to a room with some chairs in it and sat opposite her. We both avoided eye contact as we sat in silence. Finally Redheart chuckled,

“To be honest, I was hitting myself all day because I was sure I’d just made the dumbest decision of my life, and that you were just going to run as soon as you left. I debated telling somepony, but decided against it.”

“...Then why did you let me go? Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

She shrugged.

“I just kept thinking about during the invasion. You fully intended to risk getting hurt to protect us because we’re your friends. And I just... I couldn’t see the pony who did that foalnapping and trying to hurt ponies.”

I remained silent as she spoke. I wasn’t sure what to say. She knew I was a changeling and yet she didn’t seem too bothered by it. I gathered my courage and asked,

“So... you don’t care that I’m... you know....”

“A changeling? To be honest, I’m still in shock about that, and you definitely have some explaining to do. But I’m pretty confident you aren’t my enemy.”

“Really?! Why? that makes no sense! I’m a changeling and you’re a pony, I’m pretty sure we’re natural enemies!”

I froze and sheepishly shrank back into my seat after my outburst. Redheart giggled and said,

“Because you’re just as goofy and sincere as the Broken Mirror I became friends with. But still, I want to know what happened.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, why you’re here? Why you’re doing whatever you do? There has to be some story as to why a changeling showed up less than a month ago and decided to stick around for no apparent reason other than he liked it here.”

“Oh... that. Well, I guess it all started with the Queen’s speech....”

And so I told her everything. How I was left behind, how I came up with my disguise, my first few days in town, everything. By the time I was wrapping up the sun was beginning to set.

“So basically I just decided that I’d stay here and live like a pony. I mean, what else am I going to do?”

Redheart sighed and looked at the wall.

“Alright, I believe you. I won’t tell anypony about this.”

I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d suddenly started holding.

“However, you are on thin ice mister. I even catch a whiff of you doing something less than benign, I will have your buggy flank in jail before you can say ‘whoops.’”

I nodded and Redheart smiled.

“Good, now let’s get some food. I don’t know about you but I’m starving.”

“I’m quite hungry as well, but I’m glad that this is behind us.”

Redheart chuckled.

“Oh no it isn’t. Starting tomorrow you’re coming by every week so I can research you. I might be letting you keep your secret, but I am definitely not passing up the opportunity to perform a physical on a member of a recently discovered species.”

I raised an eyebrow.

“Really? Why? I didn’t think you were all sciency.”

She shrugged.

“It won’t all be just scans and tests, you’ve gotten me curious about changelings in general. I really want to know more about your species.”

“Alright, I don’t see why not.”

She clapped her hooves together.

“Great! But before we get started on that, it’s time to eat.”

All in all, I am simply glad that I not only got to keep my identity secret, but I got to keep one of my friends as well.
> Rainy Day
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have made an amazing discovery! I had thought that changelings were either born individual or subservient, but that isn’t the case! Any changeling can learn to think for themselves, but this information is withheld in order to maintain the hierarchy of the hive. I must go discuss this with the Queen at once! This could be the beginning of a new era of changeling advancement.

Excerpt from Among The Shapeless by Wanderlust.

—————————————

I looked out my upstairs window at the bizarre thing happening outside. Water... was falling from the sky, and the sky was rumbling and flashing.  I didn’t know that the sky did that. The only thing about sky water I knew was that it was wet and that it was gathered at the hive. I wanted to go to work, but I didn’t know what effect the falling water would have on me or my job. 

“Well... it’s just water, what could it possibly do to me?”

I stepped outside and shivered as the cold liquid immediately soaked my disguise and chilled me to the core. I shrugged it off and proceeded on my way. It was only a few minutes of walking before I was passing Redheart’s house and she opened the door.

“Mirror! What are you doing?!”

I waved at her and said,

“I’m going to work.”

“But there’s the storm scheduled for today going on right now... and it’s a Saturday!”

I paused.

“What’s a Saturday?”

I saw her place her hoof over her face before she waved me over.

“Just come here!”

“But I—“

“Now! Before you get struck by lightning!”

Now was my turn to... well... be more confused.

“Lightning? What’s—“

*BANG*
*rrrrrrruuumble*

I was soon standing beside Redheart. She smiled and said,

“Well that was quick.”

“WHAT WAS THAT!”

She flinched and groaned,

“Sheesh, Mirror. Er... or was it... uh.... Do you have, like, a changeling name?”

I nodded and tried to dry myself off, but this stupid pony fur made it really hard.

“By the Queen, this fur is impossible to dry!”

Redheart shrugged as she closed the door.

“Drop the disguise if you need to. It’s not like there’s anypony here who will notice and care.”

I could see no flaw with her idea so I complied. With my disguise gone the water flowed right off my body. I shuddered and sighed,

“Much better.”

I sneezed and rubbed my snout. Redheart poked her head back in and asked,

“You okay?”

I sniffed and nodded.

“Yeah, just a bit cold from the water.”

I sneezed again and shivered.

“Well then you should come warm up by the fire. I’m making cocoa if you want some.”

I nodded. I have no idea what cocoa is. As she walked off I sat by the fire and tried to warm up, but it was no use. I sneezed again and my nose started to run. I barely even noticed when Redheart sat down beside me and put a tray on the table in front of the coach.

“Hey, you feeling okay?”

I sneezed and shivered again as a response.

“That’s no good. But how did you get sick so fast? I mean, walking around in the pouring rain will chill you enough that it’ll depress your immunes system and make you more susceptible to illness, but it shouldn’t happen this fast. Here, let me check for a fever.”

She placed her foreleg against my forehead and screwed her face up in concentration. She sighed as she moved it off and said,

“To be honest, I can’t tell. Who knows if changelings have the same body temperature as ponies do?”

“Sorry.”

I sniffled and bunched up a bit in an effort to ward off the cold. She sighed and pulled a blanket out from below her table and spread it over me.

“That should help.... To be honest, the whole... changeling body thing still creeps me out.”

I flattened my ears and mumbled,

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh no-no-no! I don’t mean it like that. I’m still, well, pretty much sure you’re still my friend. It’s just... you do look kinda... menacing.”

I looked up at her as I pulled the blanket closer around me.  

“Well... actually no. Menacing isn’t the right word. Especially given how... vertically challenged you are. Are all changelings as... small as you are?”

I sniffed.

“I... I think so-oh-ooooACHO!”

I shivered again and whimpered.

“I... I’m not sick, am I? Please tell me I’m not sick!”

Redheart gave me a weird look and said,

“Uh... I’m pretty sure you have a cold. Though how you caught one so fast is beyond me.”

“NOOOOO!”

I burried my face in the blanket and whimpered. I felt Redheart touch my back as she said,

“What’s the matter? Are you okay?”

I sniffled and responded,

“I... I don’t wanna get sick! Sick changelings never get better! They go away and are never seen again!”

Redheart whistled.

“Wow... talk about overreacting.... Wait, are you being serious right now? That... that’s awful!”

I nodded and shivered again. I could feel water around my eyes. No, changelings don’t cry! Changelings don’t cry! C-changelings don’t.... Changelings....

There was a disturbance in the blanket as Redheart slipped her forelegs in and wrapped them around me.

“Hey, it’ll be okay. I’ll help you get better.”

I sniffed and looked at her face.

“R-really?”

“Yeah! I mean, it is my job after all.”

I felt the water around my eyes grow again and I pressed my face against her soft, fluffy chest.

“Th-th-thank you! Y-you’re so nice!”

She awkwardly patted my back and muttered,

“Menacing my flank. Sheesh you’re falling apart. I’ll have to write you a doctors note so you won’t have to go to work. I don’t usually for colds, but....”

I squeezed tighter and pressed my cheek against her as I continued to fall to pieces.

“You’re kinda scaring me with all this whole freaking out thing. *Sigh* what have I gotten myself into.”
> Sick Leave
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

It might come as a surprise to many that despite having changelings living among us every day, the technology back at the Hive itself is woefully primitive. For instance, should a changeling fall ill they are banished to a colony a ways away where they spend the remainder of their days in squalor in order to prevent an outbreak. I’ll have to see about doing away with this outdated system.

—excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

—————————————

I sniffed as Redheart propped me up with a pillow and stuck a weird stick in my mouth. I crossed my eyes to look at it but couldn’t really tell what it was.

“Comfortable?”

I sniffed before replying,

“Yeah, I geth.”

“Wow, it’s been about five minutes and you’re already highly congested. Maybe I should run some tests to, you know, see your iron levels and whatnot.”

I stared at her as I processed what she said. Redheart sighed,

“You have no idea what I’m talking about, do you?”

“Not really.”

“How much about diet and nutrition do you know?”

“That if I don’t eat enouph or gather enouph *sniff* love that I’ll starve.”

She waited expectantly for me to continue, but that was all I knew.

“Wait, seriously? That’s it?!”

I shrugged.

“How *sniff* muhch more ken there be-e-EE-ACHO!”

“Proper iron levels; getting enough vitamins A, B, C, D, etcetera; balancing calories from fat or sugar with those from carbs; eating mineral rich vegetables. You ever heard of any of that?”

I shook my head.

“Well, at least tell me what your diet is. What do you eat for meals.”

“Well, when I wakeup I eat some bread. Lunch is a couple flowers. And when I get home from the flower stand I eat some peanut butter. And I try to gather as much love as possible around town.”

Redheart scrunched her nose and said,

“Two questions, how are you still alive, and what do you mean gathering love? Do you, like, suck it out of ponies with your fangs like a vampony, or do you... do... whatever? Something? Does it hurt ponies?”

I looked down and shrugged.

“Uh... I *sniff* don’t really know how it works. I just kinda do it.”

I coughed a few times before sniffling again miserably. Redheart sighed.

“You sound like your getting worse. Tell you what, I’ll get you some cold medicine and then I’ll take you home so you can get some bed rest.”

“Okay.”

I sneezed again as Redheart rummaged around in her kitchen. She returned with a little bottle and poured some of its contents into a little clear container. She handed it  to me and gestured for me to drink it. With a shrug I complied.

“BLECH! It tasthe howible!”

“It’s medicine, the bitter ones always work the best.”

I scrubbed my tongue with my hoof as Redheart gathered a few things and walked to the door.

“Come on, Mirror.”

“But the storm?”

“It’s about to let up for a bit, and I have an umbrella.”

I groaned before moving to her side, leaving my blanket on her couch. She stared at me expectantly.

“What?”

“Your disguise.”

“Oh.”

I concentrated and barely managed to transform.

“Alright, let’s—“

“ACHOO! *fwoosh*”

“...That could be problematic.”

I swayed as the room spun around from the strain of using magic.

“Alright then, I guess you’ll have to stay with me until you get stronger.”

“But what if I pass it to you?”

She laughed,

“Mirror, I’m a nurse. Not only is this my job, but I’ve also developed a pretty robust immunes system because of it. I’ll be fine.”

“But—“

“No buts. You’re my friend, and friends take care of eachother.”

I sniffed and started crying again before latching onto her.

“You’re so nice! You’re my bestest and only friend!”

She awkwardly patted my head and said,

“You know, you’re very clingy when you’re sick.”

I don’t know about that but something was making me feel weird. I giggled rubbed my cheek against her’s.

“And you’re fluffy. Fluffy fluffy fluffy. Soft and fluffy. Fluuuuuuh...fy. Fluffy.”

I giggled at how bizarre the word sounded to me. Redheart pried me off and cast a skeptical glance over me as I swayed in place.

“Mirror, I know you’re pretty light and not very big, but are you tipsy from the small amount of alcohol in the medicine?”

“Wha? I don’t knowz what you mean! Hey, ken I pet your mane. It’szz so soft looking.”

Redheart whistled.

“That was fast. Maybe changeling metabolism just works faster than— Hey! Hooves off!”

She tried to push me away as I reached up and squished her bun. I giggled again,

“Izz so soft and pink and floofy and I luv it and you’re amazing even though yeeer a pony and you hate me but you don’t cuz weeeer friends but ponies hate changelingz and cagez them in locks I mean lockth them in cages and—“

“Okay, bed. Now.”

“But—“

“BED!”

I staggered as she pushed me towards a small room off to the side. I whined,

“But I want cocoa! It schoumds soo yummy.”

“I’ll bring you some in a bit. But you need sleep.”

She finally managed to wrestle me into the small futon and was about to leave when I groaned,

“Redheeeeeeaaaart.”

She sighed.

“Yes?”

“Ken you gives me a hug? Yer so soft and floofy and warm it makes me feel all warm and soft and—“

I burst out laughing before continuing.

“W-wait! I, I just said the same thingz I said! Isn’t that funny! Redheart? Red-heart? Reeeeeedheart. Redheart.”

She chuckled,

“Would that make you feel better?”

“Yeth.”

She rolled her eyes and patted me on the head.

“Get some sleep. Maybe I’ll give you a hug when I get you some cocoa.”

It was apparent that her response fell on deaf ears as a small snore rose from the bundle of blankets.
> Blech
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Unfortunately I have fallen under the weather. I made sure to leave the hive for a bit before hoof so I could recover. I shall write more at a later date. However, I feel I’m making great progress in my attempts to bring the Hive into more modern medical practices.

—excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

I coughed myself awake before groaning and sniffling. My head felt like it was going to pop and I couldn’t breath. Before long the door to the room opened and in walked Redheart.

“How are you feeling?”

“Blaaaarg.”

“That bad?”

“*Groan*”

“I see. Well I get you some medicine... for foals this time, and something hot to drink.”

I only coughed in response as she cantered away. I felt so bad and I had no idea what time of day it was. For all I knew I could have slept for an hour or seven.

“Alright, drink this.”

I groggily looked over at her as she set a small cup of purple stuff on the little table beside me. I gave her as concerned a look as I could and she rolled her eyes with a smile.

“Don’t worry, this isn’t as strong as the other stuff. Drink up!”

I wearily drank the odd juice and licked my lips.

“F-fruity,” I croaked.

“Yup, it’s grape. It should help with the cough and congestion and any headache you might have.”

“Con...can-ges...can-ges-tie-on?”

“Oh, I forgot. You don’t know much about... okay. Well, it’s the... It’s when... you can’t breathe well right now, right?”

I shook my head and sniffed.

“Well this will help unstuff your nose.”

“Oh.”

“Anyway, while you were out I grabbed what I needed to get some test samples. To be honest I’m curious about so much. The medicine acted way faster on you than it does on a pony so maybe your metabolism is much faster than.... you’re totally lost, aren’t you.”

I nodded.

“Whatever, I can teach you more later. While the tea is brewing I’m going to get some samples done.”

She walked out and returned with a tray covered in little bottles and sticks.

“Open wide and say ‘Aaaaah.’”

“Aaaaaaaah.”

She pressed a flat stick against my tongue and looked inside my mouth while wearing some sort of weird light hat.

“Well your throat seems okay. A little goopy but fine none the... uh... what in Celestia’s name?!”

“Huh?”

“Mirror, can you stick your tongue out for me again?”

I did and she carefully lifted it with the flat stick.

“Weird.”

“Wha?”

“Well your tongue, despite being forked and snakelike, is red. I thought all your soft tissue was but....”

“Buhh?”

“You’re throat... it’s green!”

“Ih iighhs?”

“Yes! I mean, I guess it makes sense given your blood is green and glow...s.... Gimme a sec.”

She turned the light on her hat off and closed the door, making the room extra dark. I could see her eyes go wide and her jaw dropped.

“Wah?—“

“Merciful Celestia! Y-your tissue! It... it glows!”

“Ah dint knnow.”

“Do... do you have any open cuts or wounds or... um... maybe I could just make a small incision and.”

She froze before smacking herself upside the head.

“No you dummy! You took an oath! ‘Do no harm.’ I’m not going to make a wound.... Oh, you can close your mouth.”

Finally. My jaw was hurting. Next she took out a little thing and stuck it in my ear. After muttering to herself for a while she grabbed a little fluffy stick thing and warned me,

“Hold still, this might be a bit uncomfortable.”

Nervously, I nodded and held as still as a stalactite. She carefully stuck the stick up my nose and wiggled it a bit before taking it out and putting it in a bottle. Next she pulled out the sharp, pokey thing from my last hospital visit. She smiled,

“You know the drill.” 

She stuck it in my foreleg and it slowly filled with green, glowing fluid. She gently pulled off the little glass container and replaced it with an empty one which she then filled. Once done she put a fluffy ball over where she poked me and covered it in tape. She sat beside me on the bed and curiously looked at the two containers. She shook her head.

“This is like something from a sci-fi book. I mean... wow.”

She looked at the clock and jumped to her hooves.

“The tea! I forgot!”

She dashed out of the room leaving me staring after her. I shook my head and called after her,

“Why are you always in a rush? You should, *sniff* slow down a bit.”

She replied,

“Can’t! Too busy! I’ll be back in a bit, just going to start getting this all tested! Bye!”

I shrugged as the door to her house opened and closed before I  flopped back into bed. After a while the door opened again and she poked her head in and said,

“Uh, you can come sit on the couch if you want.”

I nodded and followed her. She led me back to where I’d been sitting when I first felt so bad. I plunked down and wrapped myself in the blanket as she set a little cup in front of me.

“Well, that takes care of that. Sakes alive I’m tired!”

I looked over as she downed half of her drink and yawned. I took half my blanket and threw it onto her before pressing up against her fluffy side. She gave me a skeptical look before sighing.

“Whatever, you’re too small and innocent to be upset at.”

She pulled a book out and began to read as I drank my drink. I could feel my strength returning as I absorbed her sweet friendship.

(Meanwhile, at the Golden Oak Library.)

Spike opened the door as another round of knocks rang out.

“Coming! I’m coming!”

He opened the door to reveal a Royal Guard standing at attention. The stallion spoke,

“Is Twilight Sparkle home?”

“Uh... yes? Why do you—“

Suddenly the mare herself skidded to a halt behind the little dragon.

“I’m here! I’m here! Are you bringing me... you know....”

The armored pony nodded and soon more guards carried two covered cages into the library. Twilight nervously nodded.

“Alright. Put one in the basement and one in the lab. Just... be careful. I’d rather you not hurt or agitate them.”

The guards nodded and split up. Spike nervously wrung his claws and tapped Twilight on the side. She jumped and spun around.

“Huh! Who’s— oh, it’s just you, Spike.”

“Uh, Twilight? What’s going on?”

She nervously smiled and patted his head.

“N-nothing! Just... something Princess Celestia asked me to do. You know, boring student stuff.”

As she trotted away Spike frowned.

“Since when has she thought any sort of lesson was ‘boring’?”
> Smells Like Teen Spirit
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have observed that most Infiltrators spend so much time acting the part of a pony and living among us that they tend to become so much like us rather than their own kind that they sometimes identify more as a pony than a changeling. This could explain why Infiltrators never personally return to the Hive. Rather, messengers carry correspondence to and from them.

—excerpt from Among the Shapeless by Wanderlust.

As “Mirror” was recovering from his illness in Redheart’s house, a certain dragon was preoccupied with other matters.

“SPIIIIIKE!”

Twilight checked through her saddlebags again as she awaited the requested dragon. With a skidding sound, Spike slid to a halt in front of her.

“Yeah?”

“The girls and I are going out to resume our picnic that got interrupted before the wedding. Can you clean up the library while I’m away?”

Spike threw a salute and puffed out his chest.

“You can count on me!”

She affectionately rubbed his head and said,

“I’m putting a lot of confidence in you. The library is complete closed to the public so don’t let anyone in. Also, you only have to clean the library and our room... only... just those two... no other rooms.”

Spike rolled his eyes and waved his claw dismissively.

“Sure thing, Twilight, I am your number one assistant after all.”

The purple unicorn smiled and waved goodbye as she trotted out the door with a cry of,

“I’ll see about bringing you back some sweets! Bye!”

Spike waved back.

“Bye, Twilight! Have fun.”

As soon as he had closed and locked the door, making sure the “closed” sign was in place, Spike whirled around and let out a whoop of excitement.

“Aw yeah baby! I got the whole place to myself!”

He hurriedly trotted into the kitchen and opened up the refrigerator. He guiltily checked over his shoulder before grabbing the whipped cream can. He froze, can in hand, and gulped.

“Well... Twilight technically never said I couldn’t have any... but... maybe I shouldn’t... oh who am I kidding! A chance like this comes once a lifetime!”

He popped the cap and sprayed the creamy topping directly into his waiting maw. He closed his mouth, cheeks bulging, and gulped it down. With a contented sigh he rummaged around in the pantry before finding a box of cookies. He was just opening it up when a small version of him with bird wings and a halo appeared on his shoulder.

“Whoa! What are—“

The thing spoke in a high, airy voice.

“Spike, you should start cleaning! You know you aren’t allowed to have sweets without permission. What would Twilight say!”

“But I—“

With a puff of black smoke a red version of him with bat wings and horns appeared on his other shoulder.

“Ah come off it! We bust our buns working for Twilight all day everyday. We’re entitled to a little splurging once in a while.”

The two voices bickered back and forth, Spike looking to and fro between them. Finally, he had had enough.

“QUIET!”

They disappeared with twin poofs of colored smoke. Spike sighed and put the cookies back.

“Maybe I’ll reward myself with a cookie after I clean. I mean, Twilight probably would if I did a super amazing job! So I’ll just have to clean more than she said! That’ll impress her!”

Spike nodded to himself and hopped to it. He swept and dusted, he mopped and vacuumed, and he even wiped the windows. Finally, he stood looking over the squeaky clean library and bedroom. He then turned his attention to the door that led to Twilight’s lab. He bit his lip as he thought of the mountains of glass bottles, beakers, and burners he’d need to clean if he entered.

“Well... I could always clean the basement!”

Spike wasn’t particularly fond of the basement of the library. Not that he was scared of it! It just... smelled funny, yeah, that was it! He brandished his broom like a spear and trotted down the stairs. He looked up at the large “Do Not Enter” sign on the door and sighed,

“Seriously? Were ponies actually poking around down here for books?! Sheesh, no privacy living in a library.”

He opened the door and flipped the switch. There was a flicker as the bulb that illuminated the dim room started warming up. He began to move stuff off the floor when he noticed the large iron cage in the corner of the room. 

“Huh, that’s new.” Spike mumbled to himself. 

If he squinted he could vaguely see a lump in the far corner of the cramped enclosure. Unsure what it was he slowly and cautiously crept forward to examine it. As he did his broom accidentally hit the cage with a ringing “CLANG!” Spike jolted... and so did the bundle in the corner. As Spike stood shaking, his feet rooted to the floor in his shock, two blue-green, luminous eyes wearily opened. They blinked before appearing to focus on him. Spike wanted to scream as the light came on completely and revealed the creature. There, in his basement, was a live changeling!

He stood, mouth agape, as the creature studied him warily. His brain was screaming at him to move but his legs decided they only wanted to tremble. All sorts of nasty images were shooting through his mind. He saw the changeling lunging at him, fangs ready to gobble him up. Or maybe it would pounce on him before using its weird changeling magic to become him so it could get revenge for its evil queen on Twilight! Or maybe it would drain him like it drained Shining Armor! But, something happened Spike didn’t expect. The changeling, after looking around, whispered in a peculiarly accented (and mature sounding) feminine voice.

“Hey, I ain’t never seen you round here before. Who exactly are you an’ what are you doin down here? You some kinda servant or somethin? ”

Spike just stood slack jawed. It was talking to him?! Why wasn’t it pouncing or biting or growling or hissing at least? That’s how the changelings at Canterlot had acted. Wait! It was trap! It was trying to trick him! Spike slowly, carefully began to shakily back away from the cage and its inhabitant. Seeing this the changeling hissed,

“Wait! I ain’t gon’ bite! I jus’ wanna talk!”

Spike gulped and shook his head. The changeling groaned and rubbed its... rather pudgy belly.

“C’mon, sugah! You gotta help me out! I’m starvin’!”

Spike’s eyes flicked to the bowl inside the cage that had the residue of oatmeal still inside it. The changeling followed his gaze and shook her head.

“No no no! Not that kinda food! I need love or I’mma kick the bucket. Please, I’m beggin ya!”

Spike licked his lips and croaked,

“I-I don’t trust you! You’re lying to me!”

The changeling groaned and grabbed the bars, getting as close as possible.

“I ain’t lyin’! Promise! Tell you what, let’s make a deal. In exchange for you giving me love, I’ll... I’ll... hol’ up, let me think.”

Spike turned and was about to run before the changeling started sniffing the air. 

“Ooooooh, interesting. You gotta whole lotta love for a whole lotta ponies, but I can tell you like one pony in particular. Mmmhm, you got one hay of a crush.”

Spike froze, heat suffusing his cheeks as he spluttered,

“W-what?! N...noooooo.”

She laughed and winked.

“Oooooh man, that is rich! It’s a pony, right? I can tell. Dragon havin’ a crush on a pony, now that is something special!”

Spike flushed and started to get upset.

“Y-you don’t have to laugh at me! You’re just a—“

“Laugh at you? Sweetie, I am a changeling. Love is my bread and butta’... literally. I ain’t laughin’, I’m actually offerin’ to give you a little mare advice.... In exchange for some love of course.”

Spike scoffed,

“What would you know?”

“Baby I just so happen to be a mare. I think I know a bit more than you.”

Spike was still skeptical. He glanced down at the changeling’s ample stomach.

“I still think you’re trying to trick me. You’re obviously not hungry given—“

The changeling followed his eyes to her midriff and gasped,

“Uh-uh, I know you ain’t callin’ me fat!”

Spike gulped, suddenly embarrassed and... a little ashamed. The changeling scowled.

“I’ll have you know two things: one, neva-evah, fo’ no reason what-so-ever! Mention a mare’s weight! Second, I am NOT fat! I am a healthy weight! Errypony knows stallions like a mare what got a little pudge on they bones. It’s cuddly and natural lookin’! You ain’t fancyin’ no skin and bones mare right?”

Spike blushed a deeper shade of red. His thoughts drifted to Rarity, the mare he liked.

“Well... I mean... uhhh... I don’t....”

The changeling pursed her lips in an amused sort of way and said,

“Mmmmmmhm, you’re face says it all. Now, you want my help? Or do you want to sit around twiddlin’ yo thumbs till some slicker come in and steals yo mare?”

Spike gasped, the possibility of another pony wooing Rarity before he did had never occurred to him before. He rapidly shook his head and cried,

“No way! I’m going to marry her!”

He clasped his claws over his mouth and turned the shade of an apple. The changeling grinned, her fangs gleaming, and cooed,

“Daaaaaaw, that’s sweet! Now, we makin’ this deal or naw?”

Spike bit his lip and looked around as if Twilight was going to pop out of the walls at any second. He sighed,

“I guess there’s no harm in just talking to a changeling. I mean, you’re locked up so tight you could never escape.”

The changeling sighed,

“Yeah, ‘specially without no magic.”

She pointed to a ring that had been slid over her horn. Spike recognized it as a magic-suppression band Twilight had been examining.

“Oh... yeah. Apparently those things give ponies a nasty shock when they try to use magic with it on.”

The changeling nodded.

“Dang straight it was nasty! My horn was numb for a whole hour!”

Spike set his broom aside and sat on the floor. He looked the changeling in the eyes and bit his cheek as he contemplated. He eventually made a decision and said,

“Alright, give me your advice and I’ll... well, how do I give you love? It better not be something nasty or painful.”

She leaned her head closer to the gap between the bar and pointed to her cheek.

“Give me some sugah.”

Spike pulled a face.

“I said nothing nasty!”

“Boy you had better stop callin’ me nasty ‘fore I beat your scrawny behind!”

“Sorry! It’s just... does it have to be a kiss?”

“Honey that’s the most efficient way given our situation. Besides, it’s either there or on the lips, and I figured you wouldn’t want that cause I sure don’t.”

Spike groaned before nodding.

“Fine! Give me your advice.”

“Uh-uh, I don’t trust you! For all I know you’re gonna gnark on my to that crazy unicorn mare what locked me in here!”

Spike blurted out,

“Twilight isn’t crazy!”

The changeling pulled away and said,

“Wait, you’re sticking up for her! I thought you was a servant or something like that!”

Spike puffed out his chest and said,

“No, I’m her number one assistant!”

“Then you’re just as bad as she is! Nevermind, I don’t want your help!”

Spike narrowed his eyes.

“Twilight isn’t bad, unlike changelings that is.”

She scowled,

“Oh sure, join in hatin’ like errypony else. I thought that you might understand given you’re a dragon and all. Apparently I’m mistaken.”

“You invaded Canterlot and hurt a bunch if ponies!”

“I had to! The Queen forced us all to join her! It’s not like I wanted to! Besides, ponies have done some downright awful stuff to changelings years before this.”

Spike scoffed,

“Oh yeah? Like what.”

“Like forcing us to hide away from them. Like doin’ everything they can to keep us as far away from their precious land as possible. Like trapping us in a desert that is almost impossible to survive in. That enough for you?”

Spike looked down and said,

“You’re lying. No way Celestia would ever do that.”

“Honey, Celestia hates changelings more than most ponies. She and the Queen got bad blood running back generations. Whatever, this ain’t here or there. What I wanna know is what you’re gonna do. You gonna turn me in to this “Twilight” mare? Tell her I can talk and convince her to be more forceful with her questions?”

Spike thought about it and shook his head.

“I don’t think so. Wait, she doesn’t think you can talk?”

“Naw, she thinks all changelings ‘cept the Queen are mindless drones. I’m fine with her thinking that. Means she won’t do anything drastic.”

Spike was tempted to tell Twilight about this later, but he might as well get the mare advice first.

“I won’t tell her.”

“Promise?”

Spike flinched and looked into the changeling’s mistrustful eyes. He sat debating in his mind for a while. Did he tell Twilight and lose the advice on how to charm Rarity? Or did he not tell Twilight and leave her in the dark. Well... she was smart, she’d figure it out in no time! Why bother telling her!

Spike smiled and made his decision. He took the changeling’s outstretched hoof and said,

“Promise!”

“Good! Now lay one on me!”

She turned her cheek to him again and Spike said,

“Now! But I—“

“No kiss, no advice. Now pucker up and give me some love!”

Spike gulped before closing his eyes and shakily leaning towards her waiting cheek. What would this changeling feel like? Would her skin be all slimy and gross like a slug? Would she smell bad? Would she—

Before he could get more nervous his mouth had collided with her face. He froze in shock and the changeling reached through the bars and held his head in place.

“Good! Now just imagine you’re smoochin’ that mare you like.”

Spike gave a muffled complaint but was cut off.

“Up-up-up-up-up! No talking, just think about her. About her voice, her fur, her pretty eyes. She got pretty eyes?”

Yeah, the prettiest in the whole world.

“She got a stylish mane?”

It’s so pretty, how curly and shiny it is. I bet it’s super soft too.

“Gooooood. Now, how about her personality? What do you like about her?”

She’s so generous and kind to everypony she meets. I love to help her out and just be around her. Man, Rarity is the most beautifullest, most special mare in all of Equestria!

He hadn’t even realized the daydream he’d entered until he felt a tap on his shoulder.

“You can stop now, Sugah. Although I don’t mind if you don’t.”

Spike backed away with an embarassed blush.

“Sorry. I was thinking about—“

“You’re special somepony? Yeah that was the point. Now, I think I offered you some advice. Might as well make yourself comfortable.”

But Spike paused. He realized he hadn’t done something.

“Uh... what’s your name?”

“My name?”

“Yeah!”

“Why d’you wanna know?”

“Well... we’re kinda sorta friends now... in a weird way. I figured we should know eachother’s names. Mine’s Spike!”

The changeling though for a moment before shrugging.

“Alright, just keep it between you and me. Call my Spicy Jambalaya.”
> Mares 101
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

HeNlo dIS Is POmnY WiTH naMe oF WaAanDer Lassst i aM maKIng tHe WoRDs IN my SmAlL pOny bOk CHanGeLlingEys aRE vERy SwEEt aND cUDdly yOU shoUldth hUg tHeM anD GIvE tHEm SmOoCHeys I KNow I LoOoOoVE GIvINg LaPzKlPpFFl WhO iS thE BEautIfulLeST aNd HUggZAblEst QUeEn LOts Of SmOoooCHIes SHE is SOOo PRotTy aND I~~—

I apologize for that, Queen Laphistira found my journal. I’ve been teaching her how to write as I’ve stayed her. Once again, I apologize for that... I can’t exactly erase ink.

—excerpt from Among The Shapeless by Wanderlust

Spike sat cross-legged before the cage as Spicy Jambalaya began.

“Aight, first thing first, we goin over some basics. Sometimes a mare will tell you to leave her alone, but really she wants you to keep on askin’ her what’s wrong.”

Spike frowned,

“But how do you—“

“Next, if your mare says she ain’t hungry, double yo’ fries. You bet your sweet flank she gonna eat ‘bout halfa dem anyway. Also, if she asks you ‘does this dress make my butt look big’ the correct answer is ‘DAAAAAAAANG baby! You lookin fiiiiiiiiine!’ Also remember to nevah evah tell her she’s wrong. If she’s wrong, keep quiet. It is NOT worth it to call her out. She probably knows she wrong but is just trying to save face. Also never tell her anything about her makeup other than complements, compliment her mane, her eyes, pretty much errythang. But sometimes she don’t want no compliments which ain’t to be confused with her fishing for a compliment. But also—“

“WHOA WHOA WHOA! That is way to much! I mean, how am I supposed to know which one she wants or doesn’t or, or... or... any of that! Does any of this actually work!”

She shrugged.

“Works fo’ me.”

“Yeah, well, Rarity’s different than you.”

“Her name’s Rarity? That’s ain’t a very pony-like name. You sure she ain’t a changeling?”

Spike harrumphed.

“Of course she’s not. She’s nothing like a changeling.”

“Honey I’m the only changeling you evuh met.”

“Well... that’s true... but....”

Jambalaya frowned,

“Tell me you don’t believe all that junk bout changelings bein mindless drones or whatever. I mean, do I seem mindless?”

Spike huffed under his breath,

“You seem the exact opposite to me.”

“What was that?!”

“Nothing!”

She nodded.

“Good. Now, if you really want my help, you gotta tell me bout this mare. What she likes, don’t like, what she foes for fun. That kinda stuff.”

Spike bit his lip before deciding that it was alright to tell her. I mean, she was in a cage after all.

“Well, she’s really fancy and into fashion and snobby parties... not that she’s snobby! She just likes those parties with the little sandwiches and tiny drinks. Anyway, she also like all that Canterlot fancy-shmancy restaurants and play type stuff. You know what I mean?”

“Mhm, I got you. She a total diva?”

“What!? N-no....”

Jambalaya smiled.

“Yeaaaah she a diva. Aight, here’s what you need to do. Make her feel like royalty.”

Spike scratched his head.

“What do you mean?”

“You know, wait on her every beck and call, draw her baths, give her little shoulder massages, complement her dresses and how she decorates her house. And most importantly, invite her to tea in a rose garden.”

“You think that will work?”

Jambalaya waved a hoof dismissively.

“Fo’ sho’.”

She turned aside and grumbled,

“At least it does in them sappy romance books.”

Spike didn’t notice given he was deep in thought, planning his next move. He could definitely do pretty much everything that he’d been told. Just as he opened his mouth to speak a voice called out faintly from upstairs.

“SPIIIIIIKE, I’m hoooooome!”

Spike blanched as Jambalaya groaned,

“Horseapples. You betteh scram baby. It wouldn’t be good for either of us if she found out about this.”

Spike nodded and grabbed his broom before hurrying towards the door. Jambalaya called after him.

“Next time can you bring me some chocolate or something! Momma needs her sweets!”

Spike killed the lights and hurriedly closed the door before making his way to where Twilight was. As for said purple unicorn, she was looking around the library with an impressed expression on her face.

“Wow, Spike. I’m impressed! You did a really good job cleaning the place. In fact I kinda feel bad I only brought you a cupcake. Maybe we can get ice cream later?”

Spike nodded his head.

“Sounds great, Twilight. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to Rarity’s house to... uh... look at dresses.”

And just like that he was off. Twilight rolled her eyes.

“Seriously, Spike. I know you have a crush on her so you really don’t have to make excuses.”

Meanwhile, at the house of a certain changeling.

“Mirror, are you sure you’re okay? I mean, it definitely hasn’t been enough time yet. You’re still sick.”

“No, I... I’m fine. I just, just, ACHOO! Need some schlep.”

Redheart gave an exasperated look before sighing,

“Fine, I’ll come check on you in— SWEET CELESTIA WHAT IS THAT!”

I looked over at where she was pointing and saw Spaghetti lazily draped across my bed.

“Oh. Hi, Spaghetti. Did you miss me?”

He lifted his head and ploped his tongue out before stretching back out in the sunlight. I turned to Redheart and said,

“That’s Spaghetti. He’s my pet... uh... whatever he is.”

“That... that’s a snake.”

“Oh thanks, I forgot. He’s my pet snake.”

Redheart slowly edged away.

“I really don’t like snakes. They creep me out!”

“But he’s so squishy... and doesn’t have legs.”

“Even still... I don’t like it. I mean, what does it eat!”

I shrugged.

“I think mice. At least, I keep seeing him eating them... I think.”

Redheart shuddered.

“Whatever, I’m out if here. See you later... preferably without your snake.”

I dully nodded before poking Spaghetti.

“Hey, can you move. I wanna schlep.”

He slowly did and I immediately burrowed into my bed. However, Redheart was facing a different problem at the moment.

“HI MISS NURSE REDHEART!”

Redheart flinched.

“Hello, Pinky... and Rainbow Dash too. What exactly are you doing here?”

The brash pegasus hovered forward.

“We came to say hi to the new pony in town. Apparently he’s super accident prone so pranking him will be so easy!”

She stuffed a hoof in her mouth and blushed.

“Eh... whoops? I mean... just visiting. Anyway, what are you doing here?”

Pinky perked up.

“Is he your cooooooltfriend? Huh, is he? Is he? Is he? Is—“

“No!... he’s not. He’s sick is what he is. So kindly come back another day.”

Rainbow looked dejected but Pinky said,

“Well maybe a party will make him feel better! I’ll just need some balloons and streamers and cake and....”

“No, no. No parties. Let him shlee... oh horseapples now I’m saying it.”