> My way back home > by Princess Rainbow-Dashie > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Realization > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shining Armor It had been a little over a year since I had married Cadence and had my little Flurryheart. She was still small, but had grown quite a bit in her first year of living. Even though she had grown, she was still a handful to take care of considering her powers. Both of us had learnt what type of spells or reactions to expect when something happened or when she wanted to try out something new and couldn’t get it right away. Cadence and I had been living in the Crystal Empire, ruling it the best way we knew to keep love, happiness and peace among the crystal ponies we looked over and cared for. Away from everyone we knew, away from home, and most important, away from my little sister. It had been a year since she visited me and her little niece, as well as her sister-in-law, my wife. It was lonely here, and I missed my sister. I couldn’t explain why the separation was aching so much inside my heart, sure we were BBBFF (Big brother best friend forever) and LSBFF (Little sister best friend forever) and as siblings had a close relationship, but this ache was much different from anything I had felt before. My wife was still asleep, but I was wide awake by now, despite the fact that I had only gotten a couple hours of sleep. I went for a stroll through the hallways, careful not to make too much noise and wake anyone up, as I decided to make it outside instead, hoping maybe that some cold night air and a stroll would help ease the ache I felt inside. I had never been outside of the ice castle at night, usually I was exhausted after caring for Flurryheart all day long or after many nights with little sleep from taking turns with Cadence to go check on her when she woke up crying multiple times during the night. The streets were filled with shimmering lights, almost like fireflies. Soft, melancholic music was echoing through the streets as I passed through them, taking in the beauty of the outside of the castle. I wondered now, if I hadn’t made a huge mistake, as my head was clearing up the farther and longer I walked away from the castle. I could have sworn that I was listening to my sweet little sister singing, but I was sure that she wasn’t here… Still, I listened to her voice, as if she was right next to me. When I was just a filly I found it rather silly To see how many other ponies I could meet I had my books to read, didn't know that I would ever need Other ponies to make my life complete But there was one colt that I cared for I knew he would be there for me My big brother, best friend forever Like two peas in a pod, we did everything together He taught me how to fly a kite We never had a single fight We shared our hopes, we shared our dreams I miss him more than I realized, it seems And though he's oh so far away I hoped that he would stay My big brother best friend Forever Forever As soon as it had begun, it had ended, and I found myself back at the castle in no time. It was still night, so I supposed that not much time had gone by. I needed my sister by my side. I couldn’t bear the absence any longer. I knew that what I was about to do was cruel, and I wish I had realized my true feelings sooner, but now it was too late for that. I spent the rest of the night quietly packing for my things, as well as my daughter’s, in complete silence. As soon as I finished I left a note for Cadence, saying that I hoped to be back in three days and that Flurryheart would be with me. Before leaving, I softly kissed her forehead. It didn’t take me too long to make it to the train station, where I was sure Flurryheart was still asleep, as well as everypony in there. Softly, and quietly, I whispered, in a song. Yes, I, Shining Armor, was singing. The memories hurt and faith has been lost Why must things be this way? The pain is my own, the feelings yours The silence is frail The harmony is gone by now But I did find, that the stillness was gone And my tired eyes, and my lullabies Have never reached you at all… Once did a colt, that was busy so much Look down to her sister and sigh “Twili, I have no time for silly games anymore” Those words fell dark upon the young sister I loved And grew only stronger as days and nights passed Soon did that colt take notice that his sister Was always alone through the days And neither had he loved her as she deserved He watched as his sister’s studies increased And that foolish colt, did nothing to stop The loneliness that took over Twilight Goodnight little Twili, goodnight sister mine Rest now in study’s embrace Receive my lullaby, winds of love Through hearts I hope it will reach you Carry the love and the stillness inside And sleep soundly through the night Twili, you’re loved so much more than you know May troubles be far from your mind… Forgive me for treating you so wrong… I didn’t get to finish the song, for I was at Ponyville sooner than I was expected. I must have fallen asleep during the last hour of it. I was going home. I would be by Twilight’s side soon. > Love > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Twilight Sparkle I was surprised to see my brother at the door. I had gotten a letter saying he was staying for a few days and that he had missed his little sister, but it surprised me to see he had come alone. Well, if we didn’t count Flurry Heart, my little niece. She was growing to be so big. I placed a hoof over her small head, nuzzling her gently there before letting the two of them in. Maybe it wasn’t so weird, just…sudden. The time we saw each other was rare and usually only for a few days if as much at a time. So if we had three days to enjoy each other’s company, which would be great. The fact Cadence hadn’t come worried me, but I figured I didn’t really want to intrude… I felt like a philly that had done something wrong, yet I was sure I haven’t. I wasn’t one to escape from what I had done wrong. “Hey, come on in.” I invited him in, thrilled over seeing him even if it was unexpected. I nuzzled him as he walked in and settled inside, making sure to fit himself in the room with Flurry Heart so she could sleep while we talked and had the chance to catch up on conversation. But first, I needed to know… What brought him here all of a sudden. “Big brother… What brings you here so suddenly? I mean… It’s not that I’m unhappy that you’re here, far from it… But you didn’t bring Cadence with, is everything all right?” I instantly felt that I shouldn’t have made that question so soon, but sooner or later, I would suppose that the truth would come out. But even so, I wasn’t prepared to what I heard next. “Twili… I am in love with you” I blinked several times to make sure this wasn’t a dream, having gotten the biggest shock of my life. I truly wasn’t sure if that was the reason why I was running… running away from my brother, from my house and from most of what I knew… What was I going to do?... I wandered for hours to an end, heading deep into the forest, taking deep breaths to catch my breath while lying down, kind of not wanting to see anyone as of right now. I closed my eyes, hoping that I would fall asleep. However, hours passed and I couldn’t sleep at all. It was already deep in the night when Zecora found me alone in the woods. I wasn’t expecting to see her, but she had the knack to appear when anypony less expected her to. “You’re troubled, that much is clear What you’re running from, I wonder, dear Come with me, I’ll help you see How deep your troubles run free “ Hesitantly, I followed Zecora wherever it was that she was taking me to. I wasn’t even sure of where we would be going; only that it wasn’t her home like usually. I took a deep breath when seeing where we were headed. I had been there once, when I needed to battle Trixie. A long story, in which I didn’t want to go in details. I looked again at the lake and water, seeming to be focusing on looking at it for some odd reason. My thoughts were cut out by Zecora’s voice. “That’s it my dear, Let your thoughts become clear For the truth that you seek Resides inside of you and is for you only to peak “ I jumped slightly, startled, but returning to the state of calm I had been before, although I wasn’t sure I wanted to let everything become clear. What was I going to find out while I allowed myself to do so? I thought that the biggest challenges were with my friends, but I forgot an important part, my undying bond with my brother and the inability to look within my own soul, my own feelings. Perhaps that was one of my weak points, if not the main one. I stayed there for hours, soon growing frustrated because it did appear that I wasn’t going anywhere in opening myself to the water. At some point, though, I just gave in, and allowed the water to pull me underneath. Maybe it had some ideas of its own on how to get to the truth… I do not know how long I have been underwater, nor how I was able to breathe while in there, but everything seemed smooth and relaxing, as moments and memories slowly passed by in front of me, each of them making me aware of my own feelings. Had I been…in love with my brother the whole time? I found myself wishing that there was a book that would teach me how to identify my feelings, but I didn’t suppose that there was one that would. Certain things you’re meant to find out on your own, well… maybe with a little help, but not in the traditional way I was so used to. I knew the truth now. I too, was in love with my brother. It was already noon or so, judging by the sun’s position in the sky, yet I felt really sleepy, as if all that time underneath the water had made me feel that way. I was ready to go home, now that I knew the truth, and confess it to my brother. I gave Zecora a small, thankful smile before heading towards my home. It still took me a few hours to get home as I was half asleep and kept tripping over everything, and flying well…flying wasn’t an option. I was likely to come close to a tree and collide with it, and then everyone would call out a search party. By the time I got home, I expected that my brother say my running away as me being a coward, but surprisingly, he was still there, to my relief, having just tucked Flurryheart in for a nap. I barged in the house, panting. “Big brother best friend forever…. I have something to tell you!” I got his attention and he turned to me, walking over and placing a hoof over my fur. “Relax, Twili, what is going on…? You know you can tell me everything, right?” I nodded, taking a deep breath. “I can show you more than telling you… I am in love with you too…” I closed my eyes and leaned in for a kiss, not having noticed that I had left my door open. Fatal mistake, as it would be noticed later on… My brother returned the kiss, making sure I was on his embrace, safe, protected and loved. And I made sure of the same. It seemed that our bond ran deeper than either of us had imagined until now. I had never been kissed before, but…it felt magical, stronger than any kind of magic I have used or tried before. Only, it was coming from inside of the two of us, as we deepened the kiss, smiling softly at each other. I wasn’t ready, though, and he wasn’t ready, when we both heard footsteps on the hallway. “Shining Armor. Princess Twilight Sparkle. What is the meaning of this?” I turned around, seeing Cadence with a hurt look upon her eyes, as well as a soft, but angry voice that did not belong to her. I gulped and clung to my brother, my eyes closed tight. > Disagreements > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shining Armor “I, uh....we... “ I began, only to be interrupted seconds after. Seems that she wasn’t having any of my excuses, and honestly, I couldn’t really blame her for it. “Well?” She insisted. “Oh. I don’t think I need to ask what the meaning of this is. It is clear enough that you two were kissing during my absence. And you want to know what the worst part in all of this is? I get the news of your absence through a single letter. And that you’re taking our daughter with you. No explanation, just a warning. I knew something was up. You’ve not been yourself lately, Shining Armor. You think I didn’t notice the change within you? I’m the princess of love… It does not consist only in spreading love around, although that is a huge part of it. How could you two do this to me…? I thought…I thought that you loved me, Shining Armor. And Princess Twilight Sparkle, I thought you were my friend. “ I froze in my place, only keeping aware of my surroundings to embrace Twilight lovingly, as she had been sort of pushed into this mess that I had started. I could feel her emotions in synchrony with mine – guilt, sadness, and embarrassment for being caught, and for feeling this way. I could tell this wasn’t the way we expected things to go. After a few seconds, though, I felt my sister flinch right next to me – probably by being called by her title by her sister-in-law. At least… I had wanted to tell her about this. But it seemed it hadn’t gone that way. I could hear the hurt and sadness in my wife’s voice. And I couldn’t really blame her for it. But how to fix all this mess I had caused…? The three of us felt silent for what felt like forever. I guess that when there were times of tension, time went by as slow as the trains in a snowy day. Sighing, I shook my head before hearing Twilight break the silence. “Hmm… I… I think that we should take this over to Celestia…maybe?” I felt Cadence settle down, and give a nod in agreement, before darting out of the door. I gulped and turned towards Twilight, who had disappeared before I could blink, probably packing upstairs in her room. As for me, I didn’t quite have the time to unpack, save for a few of Flurryheart’s things, which I ended up putting back in place, including her crib as I let her sleep on my arms for a change before Twilight got ready, which didn’t take too long. For once, she was only taking the essentials. Before long, we were ready to depart. Once inside the train, I opened the crib again, placing Flurryheart in there so she could peacefully sleep, making sure it was well placed so it wouldn’t bump during the trip, which needless to say, was an uncomfortable one. Despite the three of us lying in beds and being physically comfortable, none of us said a word. Even the other passengers noticed the tension lying around and just headed to other places inside the train, leaving that carriage empty for the four of us. What a big and fatal mistake! The moment everyone left, Cadence and I started arguing while Twilight just shook her head and went to the opposite site while taking care of Flurryheart, despite Cadence’s protests claiming she didn’t want her anywhere near her daughter. “You can’t do that Cadence! You can’t keep my sister away from her niece! She’s my daughter too!” “Shining Armor, I am very very angry at you right now. Do not provoke me. And just pray to Celestia that she won’t take her away from you. Both of them, actually. How could you do this to me?! I thought that you loved me!” “Cadence, you… “ “Don’t Cadence me! You know what, not another word!” I just fell silent, turning away from her and my attention to my sister who looked like she was close to bursting into tears. I wanted to go and comfort her, but I could only imagine what Cadence would do if I took a step closer. I sighed and closed by eyes, just waiting for this dreadful trip to be over. At least until we got to Canterlot and could somewhat be on our merry ways and avoid fights like this in public. I was sure that the passengers near us were staring at us by now. The trip took endless hours to end, and by the time we arrived it was nearly nightfall. It would be too late to contact Celestia as the two sisters were by now changing shifts, but maybe Luna would hear us out. We made our way to the castle in silence, not daring to say a word while heading there. As soon as we arrived, though, and before I could stop her, Cadence darted right in Luna’s Night Court, dragging me, Twilight and Flurryheart with her. The court was filled with batponies, threstals and astronomers, essentially, ponies and creatures that worked at night like Luna herself and that possibly couldn’t go there during the day. I could see everyone staring at us in a weird manner, in which I couldn’t blame them. Except for Flurryheart being held by Twilight, we were in a strange position, basically having fallen over Cadence and Twilight over me. I was not ready for what was coming next. The next thing I know, Luna had been even more upset than what I have ever seen her. She began screaming – with that Canterlot voice that wasn’t really used anymore nowadays, but that Luna was still working on letting go. “How dare you interrupt the Night Court, showing up unannounced and just barging in here like you own the place?! Go and wait outside!” With her voice, I only hoped that she was using some spell that no one but the three of us would hear it, as everypony would go deaf, and if my daughter woke up, there would be trouble. With that yelling, the door in front of us slammed shut after we were thrown outside, literally. Our silence didn’t last too long, though, because minutes after we were thrown out, the three of us have started bickering and arguing outside for what seemed like forever. Probably hours, but I had no idea of just how much time had passed. But apparently long enough to upset Luna, as she interrupted – again – the Night Court to let us in, asking the current ponies in there for a few minutes. Guess that she was tired of listening to us. The doors shut behind us while she glared at us to tell her what the problem was. It was Cadence, of course, who spoke. “Shining Armor here left the Crystal Empire, went over to his sister’s house. I caught them kissing this morning. In a few words, that’s what’s happened.” I saw Luna freeze in her place, probably shocked at the revelation, but then I saw her shake her head. “All right, this is beyond my area of expertise, so this is what you three are going to do. I’ll send for some ponies to help prepare you separate rooms and you will wait until morning for Celestia. I am not going to help you because: One, none of you sent a letter warning of arrival; two, you barged in the middle of my Night Court; three, you made me cut it short due to your loud bickering. So tomorrow morning, I’m sending you to Celestia. Good night. “ And with that, she slammed the door in our faces again, leaving us no choice but to head towards our rooms, which we pretty much just did. I didn’t oppose to be there, at least Flurryheart had stayed with me for the night and we weren’t fighting anymore for now. I slept soundly until morning, although with a lot of nightmares. As soon as the first rays of sun rose, though, which indicated Celestia was waking up and Luna was soon going to sleep. I heard them talking in the corridor, with Luna pretty much dropping the news to Celestia and telling her it was now up to her. The next thing I heard was silence, so I supposed that Luna had gotten to her room by now. I stretched and yawned, sure that I wasn’t going to get any more sleep. So I headed for breakfast, to find Twilight and Cadence already eating, in complete silence but with some sort of very light death glares. I gulped while eating, not saying a word as it felt like one word could cause an explosion of magic and words between the three of us. By the time we were done, Celestia was already waiting for us. She told us to get inside, the door shutting behind us as we did. Oh dear. This was not going to be pretty. > Decision > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Princess Luna Despite having told them that I wasn’t going to help them due to the fact that they interrupted my Night Court, I was still curious and a bit wary to know what was going to happen to the future of the three of them, and of course, little Flurryheart that was already up and on my care for the time being. I had slept only a few hours, but I felt as if it had been more than enough. Despite knowing it was wrong, I was listening in through the door. I could only hear my sister’s footsteps, pacing in the room inside. “You three… Just got yourselves in a whole mess of trouble.” I heard my sister say, in a tone that was not pleasant at all. I guess that even my sister’s patience had its limits, and I was glad to not be the one to handle this, because I was sure I would lose my patience sooner and would even yell at them like it had happened the night before. “But auntie…” I heard Cadence say, only to her voice being interrupted. “Do not interrupt me while I’m talking over such a serious matter. You three were completely inopportune last night. Your behavior is inexcusable. Now, the matter lies on what I should do about the entire situation. For a start, you three will make it up to Princess Luna for ruining her Night Court by helping her – separately – over the course of three weeks, one for each of you. However you choose to take those three weeks is up to you, but I do not want any conflicts in there, therefore, only one of you will be there with her at a time. Now, if that is clear…” She then proceeded to the next part, if a divorce was possible, if she should allow and deny this love – even it if was between siblings, and who should be taking care of Flurryheart, should a joint custody not be an option. Inside there was only silence, except from a couple words that included access to memories to the three of them, mostly Shining Armor, I heard, to check for spells. In what I assumed to be one by one, their memories of the recent events were checked to see if there wasn’t any magic involved. It hadn’t been that long ago that Chrysalis had attempted to take Cadence’s place. By all means, she could be doing the same again, through having replaced Twilight and cast another spell on him. After what seemed like forever, she cleared them all of any spell, deciding that there wasn’t any. The next thing I knew was that she was checking with Cadence if what both of Shining Armor and Twilight Sparkle were feeling was really love. Suddenly I was glad that I wasn’t the one in there dealing with all of that mess, especially after hearing Cadence’s dry voice speak. “Well a- I mean Celestia. There is nothing but love between them. “ I realized that she was telling the truth, or should be, despite having all of the reasons to be lying about this, except the fact that Celestia would probably double check and catch on the lie. I froze a bit in place, even if I wasn’t involved directly in this mess, wondering what would happen next. In the hallway, I heard Celestia pacing, as if making a decision, even if a temporary one. I could bet that she was rubbing her temples by now with all this mess. To be honest, I would be, too. I waited for a while longer before I finally heard my sister to make her decision while sighing. “All right. So this is what I have decided. Shining Armor. Twilight Sparkle. You two are going to interact some more and find the source of this kind of love and how it came to be. Cadence, you will be the first to help Luna on the Night Court, and then you’re free to return to the Crystal Empire. As for Flurryheart… for now, you two will take turns. Like… Like a joint custody. Now, you have my leave to go. “She stated, waving them off. Before they had the chance to come out and see me listening in, I darted out of there silently, heading into my room to get some more sleep, and also watch over Flurryheart, letting the three of them go off their own ways to clear their heads. Celestia sure knew they would need that as of right now. After I woke up, it was already early night, so that meant that Celestia had tried to wake me up and failed, so she rose the moon for me so I could sleep a little longer, and then went to rest herself. By that time, I was showing Flurryheart some of the stars above, careful not to let her fall. “Look Flurryheart. Beautiful stars above… One day, when you are a big pony like me, you will look up at them and find them very pretty and will eventually gaze up at them for a bit every night… “I gave her a small smile, staying there with her while telling her about every constellation in simple words, the constellations that were already visible in the sky. I’d leave the others for another day when I had a little more time. As soon as it was time for the Night Court, though, I took her to Shining Armor, having been briefed about Cadence helping me during the course of the next week. So as soon as Night Court started, Cadence was already at the door, possibly staying away from both Shining Armor and Twilight. Walking inside, I looked around for a bit, not exactly sure of how many help could each of the three be. Usually my sister and I handled the most threats and problems ponies faced, but maybe this would be a small trial to let them learn something about handling problems. Equestria had faced enough trouble in the past for it to be considered safe on a certainty that the two of us would always be there. I calmly saw the first ponies coming inside, a group of five or six, bat ponies, per say, but I was so used to seeing and interacting with them that I didn’t even think that others would still be scared of them, but that proved to be wrong when I heard a ear piercing scream right from my side. I guess I had forgotten about not everypony being used to bat ponies, even if they were aware some of my guards were bat ponies and that they existed. I turned to Cadence, only to see her stammering. “It…the pony….the pony has fangs… and strange wings…” Her eyes were widening. I sighed, shaking my head. “Come on Cadence, it’s just a bat pony, it’s not going to hurt y-“ I was cut off by her when one of the ponies approached to present the problem. “But Luna, they are scary p-“ “They’re not any scarier than you, or I. You have two choices, get used to them, or get used to them.” I heard her sigh in defeat and help me through the rest of the Night Court without any more protests. Other than a few possible attempts of chaos rising in a few parts of Equestria, and a few problems regarding ponies going hungry, there wasn’t much to worry about and almost everything was solved before dawn. As dawn came, I felt it was time to lower the moon, and give place to the sun, which meant that Celestia was probably waking up soon. As for me, I went to eat something and went to my bedroom to get some sleep. I swore I could hear Cadence’s voice, in a somewhat singing tone, saying: “And now we’ll never be anything together....” When I finally fell asleep, in my mind that still echoed in my mind, and my dreams were as usual, anything but soothing.