> Tales From Tiny Deadpool > by ShrunkenBro > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Chapter 1. Going On Road Trip! > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The thunder rumbled through the dark skies, black thunderstorm clouds hovered over an empty city block the wind howled in the street and the abandoned buildings rain poured down hard creating a small pools of puddles in the broken road. Down in the in the middle of the street stood a dark figure of man who was covered in black cloak with his head facing down a sudden gust of wind made his soaked cloak flap he slowly turned his head up looking up into the dark skies. A flash of lightning revealed a man, hovering in the clouds. He slowly flew down with his red cape fluttering in the wind. The shadow of the clouds covered the man’s face, but it was quickly revealed when his eyes glowed a menacingly bright red, with the bright hazing light revealed an S symbol on the man’s chest long with his light blue costume. Superman landed down three feet from the figure, he stared down the cloaked figure who still didn’t move despite the small quake Superman created when landing. “Bruce,... We don’t have to do this.” Superman spoke sounding unsure but keep his ton intimidating. “Of course we do.” The figure stared up at Superman revealing his glowing white eyes and grabbed the hood of his cloak and flinging it off himself to revile Batman in armored suit the symbol on his chest glowed a bright yellow taking the shape of bat, his armored hands had two light green circles around them the suit hissed to puffs of steam before Batman raised his fists. The two heroes face each other down before both get in charging stains Batman’s armor hissed as he stomped his boot in the ground locking him in place, Superman hovered in the air and shot at Batman both heroes were about to coiled. “Don’t end this in a draw!” A loud voice echoed making both the heroes pause and look on the left. “Whoa,. Hey come on don’t stop killing each other on my expense.” Deadpool said kicking back on a rusty old car holding a large tub of popcorn watched them both, his mask lifted up showing his mouth full of eaten popcorn. “Come on guys I didn’t bounce universes for nothing.” “Wilson?” Batman asked looking confused. “Um which Wilson?” Deadpool turned looking at straight at you the person reading. “I know which one he’s talking nerds, just let me play this one up.” “Slade Wilson? Did you arrange this?” Superman asked sounding just as confused as Batman. “Um,.....Um,.... Um,...... Maybe~” -2 Hours Ago- In Clark’s Daily Planet Office he stood looking shocked at photo of Bruce Wayne kissing Lois Lane and Wonder Woman at the same time. “God damn it Bruce!” In his mansion overlooking Gotham City Bruce Wayne clenched his fists showing just a sheet of paper with a few words in red ink saying “MARTHA!” along with, “Donald Trump’s richer then cry baby.” Bruce grabbed the paper and ripped it up and stormed off yelling “Son of BITCH!” -Now- “That explains it you're too much of a Boy Scout to do anything like that.” Batman said rubbing his head, no one could see but under his helmet he was turning red. “Yeah and I should have guessed this was photo shopped.” Superman said holding the picture. “How did you get picture? I thought I burned all of those.” “What!” Superman gasped. “Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!” Deadpool bounced on the car happily on the car. Both heroes just watched as he bounced but then quickly stopped cause it was beginning to make Deadpool feel awkward. He just stood there on the car as the two heroes just stared at him. “Who are you?” Superman asked with cringed expression. “Uhhh! I wanted Batman Vs. Superman but all I got was a boring s**t! I Want my money back!” Deadpool roared. Throwing his popcorn in the air shooting his fists up. “What?” Batman asked. “Ahh! This boring.” Deadpool looked at Superman. “Hey how fast are you?” “What do you mean?” Superman asked but was surprised when he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to see Deadpool standing behind with a gun pointed to his head. ~BANG!~ Superman’s head was shot with a loud blast red and pink chunks of his head went flying as a bright green bullet went through his head and then a loud popping explosion went off making Superman’s head pop in a gush of blood and tissue a single glowing eye hit Batman on the helmet and flopped on the ground. “Fast then a speeding bullet my ASS!” Deadpool victoriously blew the smoke from his gun he looked at Batman who was shocked and looked very pissed. “You know something writer spent too much time building this stupid scene up so I’m just gonna end it here. Bye~” Deadpool quickly raised up his gun shooting at Batman in the head killing him instantly. “Start up the music.” Deadpool snapped his fingers. “X Gon Give To Ya! Gon Give To Ya!” Deadpool grabbed on his swords and put the handle down near his crotch and started dancing humping the sword in the air as the music played he sang along with the lyrics, he did the robot and twerked a bit shaking his ass to the beat of the song. He ended the song with grabbing his two pistols and shooting the rounds in the air. “LATER BITCHES!!!” Deadpool strutted his way down the street whistling the song. “Ahhhh! D’:” Deadpool stopped as a YouTube Comment came down crashing into the ground beside him. “Ummm,.. Ok.” Deadpool looked up seeing a another comment coming down and moved left avoiding the crashing comment. “Deadpool could never kill both Batman and Superman. >:[“ A loud nazzly voice complained. “Well I just did.” Deadpool said with proud smile showing threw his mask. Soon hundreds and thousands of YouTube Comments came shower down at Deadpool making him jump out of the way of each comment douging each one that came down one almost came close to slicing off Little Deadpool. “Hmm should have figured a bunch of Fanboys would get butt hurt about this.” Deadpool brought a gadget that he had on his arm up to his face tapping on the buttons, in a flash of blue light a portal appeared leading into a dirty apartment. Deadpool leaped into the portal landing on his couch with a loud thud he grounded as he got off the very uncomfortable couch. “Well that was fun.” Deadpool closed the portal with the gadget and stood up off the couch pulling out his IPhone and looking at the posted video titled ‘Deadpool kills Batman and Superman’ he scrolled down at his posted video seeing all the comments. They were very unhappy with Deadpool saying things like. “#DeadpoolWorstHeroEver!” “Deadpool is just a troll with a comic book series” “DC Will never be better then Marvel” “Ooooo~ I started a flame war nice.” Deadpool giggled like a schoolgirl as he watched all the comments going at each other with awful language and dumb internet facts that were dated since 2009. Deadpool continued to watch the comment slater on his IPhone no noticing the rake on the floor. Deadpool stepped on the pointed end making the rake’s wooden end rise up smacking Deadpool in the face. “AHH!,.. Uhgmugmugh~” Deadpool grabbed the rake tossing out the open window hitting a bicyclist and making him crash into some trash bags. “Ok why was that even in here. I don’t even remember putting a F*** rake in here.” Deadpool ranted rubbing his face. And as for the reason of the rake it was because the writer of this Fic loves slap humor. “Whooa~ WAIT!,.... Fic? What do you mean Fic?” Deadpool scratched his head and stopped his white eyes widen. “OH HELL NO! I’m in a FanFiction! NO NO NONONONONONONO! Last time I was in a Fic some jackass made me make out with a goat mom that had a wing dang doodle! Honestly if you're gonna pair me with someone pair me with Spidey or Harley Quinn.” Deadpool started to fantasize Harley imagining her grabbing his butt and bringing him right to her face and calling him ‘Mr. Big D’ “Oooo~ Harley,..... AHHH! Wait who put my fantasy on words stop that!” Sorry Deadpool but whatever you do I write. “Oh great. So what are you gonna make me do?” Well, nothing right now... you just be you. “Oh ok. Thanks.” Deadpool smiled, thinking of Harley Quinn again. “Ooh… Harley, you are the only non-Marvel girl I love. One day you WILL BE MINE!” Deadpool raised his hands in the air from above he heard his neighbor yelling at him to shut up. Deadpool just shrugged and sate on the couch. Deadpool then sate up. “Yeah why did you make me do this again?” And went to the kitchen going to his fridge and opening it grabbing a pizza box full of sausage and cheese pizza with stuffed crust. “Damn writer! You know how to feed a guy.” He happily walked over to his couch flopping down with his pizza and flipping the TV on. The TV showed a funny prank show called ‘Impractical Jokers’ showing a bunch of 40 something year old guys making fools of themselves. Soon the commercials started up and trailer for Deadpool 2 showed. “AHHHHHHH! I look,... Beautiful!” Deadpool groped the TV as he watched the trailer. “I am gonna kick so much ass. F***, Fox better get me more than just X-Men characters if I don’t get to be with my Spidey Bro. There’s gonna be a F**k ton of blood!” Deadpool looked away from his TV. “But no one could ever replace you, Senpai!” Deadpool ran to a picture of Ryan Reynolds that he hung on the only wall that wasn't riddled with bullet holes. It was surrounded with Christmas lights and shined two tiny spot lights on. Deadpool caressed the photo. “Never will they sew our mouths shut again! And I’m just gonna back away now.” Deadpool smiled while still staring at his photo of the actor. “I don’t wanna rip my picture of Senpai.” Deadpool flipped over onto the couch again sitting next too the pizza grabbing a slice and eating through his mask,... Somehow. Deadpool ‘Mmmed’ loudly as he ate the pizza. he flipped threw the TV not spotting any good shows he would watch the History Channel but the alien dude wasn’t there anymore,... Was he? “Are you asking me?” Well no not really I just don’t know if he’s there anymore. “Eh I don’t care.” Deadpool kept flipping the channels going over every channel not seeing anything that sparked his interest,.. “WAIT! What time is it?” Deadpool quickly hit channel 294 hitting the ‘Discovery Family’ station. “Man I miss the Hub. All well time for a new episode. Eeeeeee~” Please don’t do that again. “Zip it you know you act the same way to. Hypocrite.” Deadpool grabbed a Pinkie Pie and Princess Luna plushie and squeezed them tight as My Little Pony Friendship is Magic turned on and began a brand new episode. The episode began with Twilight and Starlight Glimmer in Ponyville Twilight seemed off her expression was almost blank which had Deadpool scratching his head. “Gee Starlight Glimmer you're a great character. You're totally great after enslaving the Yak Kingdom in a cult and making them believe in Friendship.” Twilight sounded almost brainwashed. “AHH! Another Starlight ego stroke episode.” Deadpool sat back in the couch sinking in it he quickly got an idea he grabbed his IPhone seeing a Lyra plush for sell on EBay he lined up the IPhone to the TV aiming his target and used his finger to flip the image of the plush, from his phone to the TV the plush flew out of nowhere hitting Twilight in the back of the head. She blinked twice and looked around “Wh-What,.. Where was I.” Twilight looked over at Starlight Glimmer “Oh. Starlight Glimmer how did you get out of the dungeon?” “What are talking about Twilight?” The obviously evil unicron gulped nervously backing away. “Oh nevermind.” Twilight used her magic to levitate a shovel over Starlight and whacked her on back of the head knocking her out cold. “Spike get the keys to the dungeon she got out again!” “Yeah that’s my Twiliy!” Deadpool did a little dance in his seat his IPhone rang making him jump and grabbed it the caller ID was ‘Doctor Strange’ “Uh oh.” Deadpool answered the call bringing it to his ear. “‘Allo gov’na.” “Deadpool what did you do?” “Oh come on Strange it was another Glimmer pleasure stoke again I just saved this episode it looks like there’s gonna be something really cool happening.” “But Starlight had such a good Season 6 ending.” Deadpool rolled his eyes as Doctor Strange babbled on how Starlight Glimmer was the best character, Deadpool bobbed his head and made his hand talk in goofy way as Strange continued. As Deadpool watched the episode he smiled seeing Pinkie Pie bounce around happily but he then noticed something in the background. “What the,...” Deadpool squinted and got up closer to the TV in the background Rainbow Dash was chasing something? Something really small really really small. Deadpool got closer and spotted what looked like a midget running away from Rainbow Dash. “Wait what!” Deadpool stood up and brought the phone to his ear. “Hey Strange did you see something weird?” “Like what Wade?” “A tiny guy running from RD?” “... Wade... are you high again?” “NO! Look in the background.” Deadpool heard ruffling as Strange was probably moving and looking at his TV. “I still don’t see anything Wade.” Deadpool sighed getting up and rubbing his eyes. “Whatever man. Hey have you seen Spider Man around? I was thinking of playing some Mario Kart with him today.” “Oh Wade you didn’t hear?” “Here what?” “Peter is missing.” “Whoa, whao, whao! What since when?” “Three weeks now. We’ve been looking for him. JJ already saying he’s plotting some scheme to take over New York.” “Yeah that sounds like dickhead Jameson. Well, I’ll keep an eye out for him. seeya Doc.” Deadpool hung up the phone and sate down on the couch rubbing his chin. “Now I know I didn’t hallucinate that. Hmm did I?” Deadpool grabbed another slice of pizza and started eating it as he continued to watch the episode. Deadpool kept his eyes peeled for anything else in the episode as he watched the ponies he kept watch on the background wondering if he’d see anymore midgets. He was about to nab another pizza when a knock at the door made him pause. “Hmm wonder who that could be. Couldn’t be anyone relevant to this Fic’s plot.” Deadpool sat up the knocks were getting much louder and faster. He slowly tip toed over to the door going against the wall and slipping his way to the door. “Please let be a stripper. Or Harley Quinn… or a Harley Quinn Stripper.” He opened the door to only be meet with a young woman who looked shocked since Deadpool was pointing a gun at her face. “Oops sorry.” Deadpool closed the door and then opened it again. “Hello there. I’m your not so friendly neighborhood, Deadpool.” Deadpool greeted with a slice of eaten pizza. “Yeah you’re definitely the guy I need.” The girl walked into his apartment. “Whoa,.. Hey um rude. Who are you anyway?” “Sorry but this is important. Really important... it’s my little brother, he’s missing.” “What? Missing,.. Wait a minute... if Spidey’s missing,.. How long has he been gone?” “Three weeks,.. It was the same time a few other had started going missing as well.” “I see. So how do you expect me to find?” “Well, you're Deadpool. I mean, my little brother talks all about,... he’s your biggest fan, surprisingly. And he-” “For my fan!!!” He got up and jumped through the window. “Um I should’ve gave him a photo of him first.” She said looking out the window. “Umm. Yeah I should have probably do that first.” Deadpool suddenly as if in way was going backwards like if you rewind a scene from a movie. “So what does the guy look like?” “Oh... this is him.” She took out a photo of a kid around 13 years old he was standing with his sister near a Christmas tree, holding up b a Deadpool T-Shirt that he held proudly. “Please,.. He and my mom are the only family I have left,... If something’s happen to him…-” She began to tear up “Shhh~ It's ok. I’ll bring him back to you, I promise.” He pulled out a banker hat and a cash register. “Will that be Cash, check, credit, or debit?” “... Credit.” she sighed, handing him her credit card. He took it and scanned it. “Much thanks to you! Know where he was last at?” “The park. He used it as his alone time. You really think you can find him?” “I can die trying… Which I can't.” He put on a fedora and trench. “Now if you excuse me, I need to get into my best Noir impression.” He walked out of the door, everything turning black and white in his eyes, followed by smooth jazz playing. As he stepped out, everything began to rain… and he monologues to himself. It was another missing case. Some kid disappearing, three weeks along with my bud, Petey. Call me crazy, in which I am, but perhaps someone, or something, is taking them away. That, or Petey is acting like a real spider and having himself meals from some other missing people… I’m hungry. He took a Chimichanga from the park bench and ate it away. Aw… nothing to soothe the soul with herpes infested chimichangas. Deadpool what are you doing? “What?” Deadpool I’m the writer/narrator here. “I know! I just wanted to act like a detective from those noir films. I am finding a missing person, after all.” Hmm well ok keep doing what you're doing but when you're done let take over again. “Yaaaaay~” I found my way down to the old park some kids were there playing on swings and merry go round,... Wait is that swing over there taken? I quickly ran over to the free swim jumping on it and started swinging. “Weeeee~ Weeeeeee~ Weeeeeeee~" Deadpool! “Sorry. You take over.” Deadpool swung on the swing for a bit but stopped when a five year old stared and shook his head. Deadpool stood up and took off the detective cloak and hat and just walked away from obviously disappointed child. Deadpool scratched his head. “Now then if I was a 13 year old were would I go for my alone time?” Deadpool started thinking of his youthful days, remembering all the dirty magazines. “Oh wait. I got this thing. Plot device.” Deadpool brought up his gadget and tapped some of buttons randomly,.. Nothing. “Aww come on! Hmm if this kid disappeared 3 weeks ago maybe it's moved on somewhere,...” All of sudden Deadpool felt a gust of wind blowing past him he turned to see a large circle glowing pink and bright blue. “Whoa,.. I think this is it.” Before Deadpool could even say anything, gravity started lifting Deadpool in the air. He quickly stabbed the blade of his sword in the ground as the portal tried sucking him in along with whatever nearby dirt and gravel that pelted him. “This,... SUCKS!” Deadpool spotted some magazines getting caught by the air one of them smacked him right in the face. “HA! I knew it.” Deadpool suddenly lost grip and was sucked into the portal. “AHHHHHHHHHH!” Deadpool flung around in the portal seeing flashes of light giving him quick seagers. Soon he found himself now in the open air but something was different it smelled cleaner and sweeter? Deadpool blinked twice before realizing he was now falling. “WHAAAAAAAAAH! Oof!” Deadpool landed face first into the ground leaving a cloud of dust. The cloud faded away showing Deadpool now sticking out the ground with only his bottom half kicking around trying to get free. Deadpool’s feet touched the ground and tried push himself up soon his arms were free and then with his arms and legs pulled the rest of his body out of the ground only,... his head was gone. “Over here idiot.” Deadpool yelled out to his body that walked awkwardly over to his severed head. “Come on that’s it.” Soon the body grabbed his head snapping his head back down into his neck there were a few cracks, pops, and snaps but his head was now back on his body again. “Phew. That’s better. Now where heck am I?” Deadpool turned around seeing what looked like town near by,.. “Whoa wait,.. Is that Ponyville?” Deadpool’s eyes twinkled brightly in an anime like fashion. “Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee~” Deadpool jumped in the air excessively he started dancing doing a mexican fiesta dance. He shook maracas happily as he danced shaking his hips left and right. “Moon Cheeks, Pinks I’m coming home!” Suddenly Deadpool saw a large round shadow around him that started getting bigger, and bigger, and bigger, and bigger! “I feel like I should be worried.” Deadpool looked up seeing a GIGANTIC hoof coming down right on him. “OH S-.......” With a loud booming stomp Deadpool was crushed under the enormous hoof of giant Big Macintosh as he walked down the dirt path pulling a wagon behind him. “Ugh,.... ow,.... Medic!” Deadpool was pressed down into an impression of a hoofprint, his crooked and broken arm raised up grabbing the edge of the print and pulled himself up as much as he could. “This,.. Is not the Equestria I use to know.” The pony in question was a stallion, the largest stallion of the village of Ponyville. His coat was a bright red, mane was orange, had yellow hooves, and wore a brown yoke across his neck. He had a sliced, Green apple on both of his flanks, and despite being a pretty heavy looking fellow, he was as hard working as a work horse. Sure, the sudden appearances of these Tinies were surprising, even the news on how they’re tasty, but it wasn’t enough to make him stop his hard work… except for something under his hoof. He looked down to see what looked like a tiny arm sticking out, trying to claw it’s way out. “Uh oh.” He simply spoke, taking a step back. Underneath his hoof, was another Tiny, but not like any of the ones he’s seen. Rather, this tiny was in what could only be described as a spandex costume, mask included, and had two sheathed swords on his back. “Ugh,... hey! McDonalds! Watch where ya going, will ya!?” The tiny yelled, waving a fist at him. “Wait a second… HOLY S**T!!! Big Mac’s a Kaiju now!!! RUN!!! IT’S MACZILLA!!!” He ran around in circles, waving his arms wildly. All Mac did was give a confused look. The confused stallion just watched until the tiny was done. He then walked over scooping him in his hoof gently dropping him on his nose. “Ya better stick with me. I think ya’ll hurt yourself,.. Or at least, bump your head really bad.” “... He’s talking to me!” Deadpool’s eyes turned into the shape of hearts. “My lifelong dream of talking to the stallion I’d go gay for is actually talking to me… I must be in heaven!” Big Mac continued to stare awkwardly, having no idea who this Tiny is, or what in Equestria he was talking about. Deadpool hugged into Big Mac’s nose, snuggling up in his warm red fur. “Man nothing can ruin this day.” Somewhere else on the dirt path, another portal opened, this time, a figure shot down, landing into the ground with a loud boom but to the ponies more of a ‘Poof’ sound that was barely felt. The man stood up tightening his fists, his mask a half orange and black mask, guns and many melee weapons around his hips and back. His one bandana fluttering in the wind. “Deadpool...” His raspy voice spoke. It was the terminator Death Stroke! He stood there watching as the red giant walked down the path. A butterfly flapped around him with one single flash of his blade, the butterfly flopped to the ground it’s wings cleanly cut. “Your time is up…” To Be Continued. > Chapter 2. A BIG Tummyache > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Big Macintosh slowly walked down back to his family's barn.He was tired, but not from all the hard work he’d done, but from the oddball Tiny he had picked up. “Your nose is so comfy.” Deadpool snuggled on Big Mac’s nose, cuddling in his bright red warm fur. The Apple stallion just rolled his eyes and kept walking, trying his best to ignore the strange Tiny. “I wonder if anybody’s gonna ship us together after reading this Fic.” “....What?” Big Mac’s eyebrow rose, looking confused as he watched the bizarre man continuing to cuddle his nose. Deadpool climbed up Big Macintosh’s snout and found his way into the stallion’s mane. He smiled, happily feeling the rough hairs around him and relaxed into the soft hair snuggling into locks of his mago. Deadpool climbed his way out of the golden jungle finding the top of his mane. “I’m king of the world!” Deadpool yelled waving his arms out feeling the wind blowing past him. “Better love story than Twilight.” “Ya’ll ment my sister’s friend?” Big Mac asked as he looked up at his Tiny companion. “She’s a princess. Maybe she can help ya’ll find your home.” “Sorry big guy. But I’m here on mission.” Deadpool put his hands on his hips making a superhero stance. “Parden?” Big Mac asked “There’s a kid out there in this world. He’s lost and I gotta find. Plus the kid’s a big fan of mine and I'LL DO ANYTHING FOR MY FANS!” Deadpool pulled out one of his katana's and pointed it in the air. Big Macintosh’s mouth hung open a bit showing his confusion, but he just kept walking back to his home. ‘This Tiny’s a loony’. He thought to himself ‘Don't want her to meet this fellow.’ Deadpool leaned on Big Mac’s ear with his arms crossed behind his head feeling the rocking around him as Big Mac walked. “Really wish I could see your thought bubble. Too bad this is in writing form.” Deadpool hugged the side of the red ear snuggling into it. ---- Somewhere in the grass, Slade, A.K.A., Deathstroke, pulled his way through giant blades of grass cutting down all the blades with his sword as he saw his target on the head of an enormous red equine. “It would be unwise to attack him now. That red beast seems to be have taken him in as some kind of pet.” Slade’s single eye tightened, letting out a huff of aggravation. “What kind of twisted world is this place? Doesn't matter, as long I can get to him, I won’t have to worry about this God forsaken place anymore.” Slade swiped down the last blades of grass, watching the giant red horse heading for a barn of some kind. It looked a bit cartoonish to the assassin, he pointed his arm up pointing to a tree above him; a hook shot out from the device on his arm, casting a long wire out hitting the nearest branch and pulling him straight up into the branch. As soon as he landed, he pulled out his sniper rifle and looked through the scope, getting a good eye on his target. “Better wait until that beast falls asleep. Then he’s mine.” Slade snuck his way into the leaves, hiding in the shadows. ---- Big Mac entered the house. “Ah never got yer name, sir.” Big Mac spoke as he walked up the stairs to his room. “You can call me sexy.” Deadpool answered in a seductive tone and pose. The stallion glared with annoyance. “Yer real name.” “...Fine. You're no fun. It's Wade Wilson, but everyone calls me Deadpool.” “Fine with me, Wade. Ah hope mah family doesn't mind you being here. Oh, and please no cursing while mah little sis’s around.” “No promises.” Deadpool playfully tickled Big Mac’s ear. “Please, stop.” Big Mac huffed a puff of steam from his nostrils as he stomped his way up stairs. “You wouldn't like it when Ah’m angry.” “What? You actually talking for once?” Deadpool joked, smiling with a wide grin that you could almost see through his mask. Big Mac didn't smile from it. “... Yer not funny.” “The audience disagrees!” 8-Bit glasses fell and landed over his eyes as loud music played out of nowhere. “Figures the only audience is in your head.” Big Mac rolled his eyes. “Boy, that was kind of savage, even for you…. I like it! You should show that side more often.” ‘... He’s probably from Pinkie’s village.’ Big Mac thought. “I probably am.” Deadpool playfully poked at Big Mac’s thought words. “H,.. How did you?... Are you some kind of mind reader?” “Not really. Ever heard of the ‘Fourth Wall’.” Deadpool said as an imaginary brick wall appeared and suddenly crumbled behind him. “Yeah, Ah think Pinkie’s brought it up a few times.” Big Mac rubbed his chin thinking of when Pinkie Pie explained to him about the magical wall that lead to a window to a whole other worlds. “Good enough for me.” He laid back down. “So, when can I meet your family, the apple butts?” “... They’re out right now. Ah’m in charge until then.” “... Damn it. I was hoping to dress up as a vampire and bite them on the booty… and perhaps have that song Eat the booty like groceries playing.” “PARDON! Ya’ll want to what!? ”Big Macintosh’s eyes grew a raging red as he stared up at Deadpool his intimidating glare quickly made Deadpool change the subject. “.....Do you like sports?” He held up a baseball bat, though squeaked it all. ---- “Really?” Slade asked as he watched. “You are such an idiot for saying those things.” He looked to see the sun setting in the distance. “Hmm… the day/night transition in this world is faster… and more controlled than that of Earth. Hopefully, they fall asleep. Easier and cleaner kills.” He pulled a knife from his pocket and readied a stabbing position. ---- Big Macintosh yawned rubbing his eyes. He put Deadpool in a bowl with some cotton and a rag in it, making a makeshift bed. It would have to do until Big Mac would know what to do with Wade. The stallion took off his yoke, setting it on the wall near his bed. Deadpool watched in his bowl bed as Big Mac rubbed his mane and shook his head waving his mane in slow motion. “Oh… oh yes!” Deadpool watched happily, but stopped as he realized it all. “Good Grief!!! He’s naked!!!” He yelled, covering his eyes. Deadpool peaked, opening his fingers at the stallion, who was looking at him with a raised eye brow “You do know I don’t wear clothes, right?” He asked. “... I count that yoke as part of your clothes.” Big Mac just rolled his eyes again. “You know you’d look nice with a flannel shirt.” “Ah can’t agree, nor disagree with that… and are ya’ll always like this?” “Only to my favorite things in life.” “... You’re strange.” He laid down, quickly turning off some lights, and turned his back at Wade. “Goodnight.” Deadpool slipped out from his bowl bed and climbed down onto the bed. He leaned into the GIGANTIC red wall of Big Macintosh’s back and felt the soft fur under him. “Soooooo soft~.” Deadpool then tiptoed his way down the red giant’s back, standing near his butt. He couldn’t help but reach out and squeeze the cheeks. He laughed immaturely before sniffing the air. If smells could kill… then he’d be in the last level of hell. Deadpool felt the ground shake seeing the risen head of Big Mac looking down at with his angered red eyes, beaming a hole through Deadpool. He playfully chuckled and immediately jumped back into his bowl bed. “... I like your booty cheeks.” He smiled away. “... Why don’t you marry them?” Big Mac sarcastically asked, going to bed. An idea came to his head of Deadpool and Big Mac’s butt in a wedding, with everyone he knew, and everypony’s butt, in the audience. It was ended as Deadpool was punched in the face. “OW!!!” He shouted, feeling his nose had broke upon impact. “Ah!!! … Why!? I was having the only gay fantasy of my life! … 2nd with Ryan Reynalds.” He looked up to see a familiar face… or mask. Death Stroke stood over Deadpool with brass knuckles on his fist. He grabbed Deadpool by the throat and tossed him right out of bowl, sending him flying down into the wooden floor with a loud thud. “Oh? Am I gonna be penetrated by a DC character?” Deadpool joked picking himself up… Only to have a sword thrown into his chest. “AHH! Penetration,.... On the first date!?” Deadpool pulled the sword out from the wooden floor quickly standing up with the sword sticking out of him waving around as he tried pulling it out coughing up blood as he pulled. “Ow,.. Hehe~ Well,.. Nothing I’m use to. Man, how many times has someone put a sword through me?” “I see you still have your sense of Humor… Wade.” Deathstroke growled. “You may have won before, but today is my victory.” “Oh? Well, that’s what you always say. So why are you after me this time?” “You want to know? Well Batman was my target… and you got to him before me.” Deathstroke growled cracking his knuckles. “So basically,... YOU TOOK MY JOB!!” “It was either me or Will Smith. I think I did it better. Ooh! Suicide Squad joke! So what are we? Some kinda Tales from tiny Deadpool?” “... No matter… I also know you're here for a lost child, if I am correct. Surprisingly noble of you.” “Um,.. No,.. No, I’m not... I came here just because I could!” Deadpool tried to lie while pulling on the sword in his chest. “Your lying is as terrible as your jokes.” Deathstroke leaped off the nightstand and landed with thud near Deadpool, he pulled out his double pistols and aimed at Deadpool’s head. “S**t!” Deadpool got out his dual katanas and got ready for the incoming attack only problem was the sword still logged in his chest. “This,... Might be a problem.” “Allow me.” Slade pulled the sword out of his chest, followed by delivering a powerful uppercut that made Deadpool fly up into the air, landing beside a snoring Big Mac. Slade leaped into the air and pointed his pistols down and fired. The bullets hit the mattress, shredding it in sparks of gun fire and feathers. Deadpool was getting filled with shot after shot, blood spewing as he was shot repeatedly by Slade’s fire. Deadpool started running, even with the bullet holes in his whole body. Big Mac stirred in his sleep and turned around, snoring right in front of the two. “Ooh! Lightbulb!” Deadpool shouted. He stopped, with Deathstroke following. Wade grabbed Slade and threw him into Big Mac’s Mouth. “YEET!!!” However, Deathstroke fired a grapple hook into Deadpool’s chest. “... Aw s**t.” He was pulled in. Deadpool and Deathstroke both came flopping into the giant stallion’s tongue. The massive jaws closed behind them, sealing them both in darkness. “Pinochioooo~!?” “No. Just Death.” Slade suckerpunched him in the face, knocking Deadpool onto one of the molars, followed by receiving a kick to the face. Deadpool had flying birds and stars going around his head as he shook his head and quickly pulled out his sword and charged at Slade. “TAAAACOOO BEEEELLLLL!!!” Deadpool shouted ran across Big Mac’s squishy tongue and leaped up in the air, swinging and missing Slade. He grabbed and stabbed at him, missing him at every hit. “HOLD STILL AND DIE!” Slade jumped back landing on molar with ease he pulled out a sniper rifle from his back and aimed for Deadpool’s head, he clicked the gun and fired. The blazing bullet went straight for Deadpool, but was cut in two with Deadpool’s duel katina’s. “Whoa,.. Hey Slade were fighting in someone’s mouth have the respect to not put them in the hospital with are fight.” “Figures you’d side with dumb animals Wade. The simple people always feel more comfortable with things dumber than them.” Slade cocked his rifle and took four more shots all be blocked and stopped by Deadpool’s blades. Suddenly something the felt like an earthquake caught the two mercenaries off guard when the gigantic tongue suddenly lifted. Deadpool lost his balance flopping down into the slimy member and rolling down into the center, Slade’s one eye widen when the enormous tongue knocked him off the molar and made him slide down slippery tongue right next to Deadpool. Slade glared down at him quickly rolling on top of him and delivering a round of heavy punches to the face. “Ah,.. Ow!,.. Son of!..Ow!,.. Ow!,.. Ow!” Deadpool tried pushing Slade off but his weight kept him grounded on Deadpool, as he was getting punched in the face viciously Deadpool quickly raised his left knee into Slade’s crotch making him yell out in pain jumping off Deadpool and hold his nuts. “Nut shot!” Deadpool joked trying to smile despite the two black eyes and broken teeth he had, but still gave a thumbs up. It was cut short when both of the men suddenly found themselves sliding down towards the waiting throat of the sleeping Apple stallion. “Nope!” Deadpool shouted getting to his feet and running down the tongue and leaped into the air grabbing hold of the squishy uvula with a loud squishing sound using his arms and legs holding onto it tight. Slade used his grappling hook to fire at the teeth in hops to get the hook between the two molars as if luck refusing it the tip of the massive tongue flickered stopping the hook from reach its target. Slade kept sliding down getting closer and closer to the waiting abyss he tried fighting his way but no luck, the tongue was too wet with saliva and Slade was heading for his demise. ~Burp~ A blast of air shot Slade away from the throat and the tongue flopped back down with a loud heavy boom. Slade sighed with relief getting up grabbing his rifle to shoot. “I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALL!” Deadpool swung on the uvula flicking it left and right till he left go shooting right at Slade kicking him in chin with both boots ramming into him “Like the s**t off my boots!” Slade flopped down on the tongue rubbing his chin and quickly getting back up he breathed heavily obviously getting pissed he tightened his first and stood in his stains. “Now where were we oh yeah. Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die!” Deadpool ran at Salde with his duel katina’s. Deadpool swung at Slade quickly, who moved left, but Deadpool swung left, striking Slade in the chest, cutting only his armor a bit. Slade quickly retaliated by grabbing Deadpool’s blade, pulling both out of his hands and stabbing it right into Deadpool’s left leg. “Righty! You betrayed me!” “You betrayed yourself.” Slade replied, punching him in the balls. Deadpool let out a high pitch scream, grabbing onto his nuts and rolled over… right near the edge of the throat. Slade grabbed Deadpool by the neck and held him up in the air. “You got a strangle fetish or something?” “Knowing you, you’d probably want this.” He punched Deadpool in the face, knocking him unconscious, then dropped him into the throat. But, somehow, Deadpool grabbed Slade’s wrist and pulled off the grappling hook and fell down into the cave like abyss. ~GLURK!!!~ The mouth opened, and Slade jumped out. “Those acids should finish him off.” He spoke to himself as he ran and hid away as the stallion woke up with some hiccups. Big Macintosh flopped his tongue out a bit, flicking some small pointed objects out of his teeth and spitting them out. Rather than waking up, he yawned loudly and gave a slight burp before flopping down into the pillow. He smiled as he felt like he ate something, totally unaware of what just happened. Deadpool watched as Big Mac’s wet throat muscles retracted and brought him down to the stomach. As much as he wanted to climb out, he wasn’t afraid of digestion. Sure, it’d be painful, but it’s nothing… that, and he didn’t want to choke Big Mac to death. “Ugh… this is so gross.” He mumbled to himself. The esophagus opened, revealing the stomach. “... Welp… I hope Big Mac doesn’t eat while I’m here.” Wade was pushed into the stomach, landing with a splash. All around him, the fleshy prison slowly contrasted, digesting away some apples the stallion had eaten earlier, following the rhythm of his booming heartbeat, and, overall, dripping with acids and other such liquids. “... What do I do now?... Should I exit via butt? Wait for him to wake up? … Or climb my way up and hope I don’t choke him.” “Uh… hello?” An innocent, young girl’s voice spoke. “Papa? Who’s this?” Deadpool turned to see that, sitting on a not-so-wet lump of flesh, was a girl. She looked to be around 8 years old, had pigtails, wore a light blue dress, and just looked plain old adorable. However, Deadpool freaked out. “HOLY NUTBALLS!!!” He got up and grabbed onto the girl, holding her above the acid floor. “F**K ME!!! I GOTTA GET YOU OUTTA HERE!!!” He pulled out a sword and readied his arm to slice through the stomach wall. “I should’ve known that it was too good to be true! Giant ponies that eat people!? This is worse than AOT!!!” “W-Wait! Don’t hurt Papa!” She yelled. “Don’t worry, little gal. When we’re outta here, you’re-” He paused and blinked. “Wait… did you just say Papa?” She nodded. “Yes.” “...Uh, look, I ain’t your daddy, okay? I may like kids, but I’m not-” “No! Don’t hurt Papa!” “... Wait a minute… are you saying… Big Mac’s your dad?” She nodded again. “... Why the f**k did he ate you!? This is almost as bad as-!” “W-wait! I-I can explain! Are you new here?” “In this stomach or in Equestria?” “I’ll take that as a yes. Can you please put me down and calm down?” “Into the acids and be digested!?” “Like I said, I’ll explain everything.” Deadpool thought for a minute, but sighed and gently put her back on the surface. “Alright… give me one good reason why I shouldn’t gut your ‘papa’ and save your life?” 1 Hour Later. The girl introduced herself as Claire, and how she was adopted by Big Mac. Deadpool was triggered by the fact that some people actually tried to sell her as some sort of slave, but was rather relieved to know that Big Mac was there to save her, even if she was terrified at his size. Claire told Deadpool that people had been disappearing from their homes and landed in Equestria. While Deadpool thought it was awesome, it was ruined as humans were discovered as being tasty treats to the ponies. Wade wanted them to get out now, but Claire continued that the spell that made them delicious to the ponies and other creatures of Equestria also made them invincible to whatever they did to them… just as long as it’s in contact with the creature. Big Mac stepping on Deadpool earlier wasn’t painful at all, but if it were a boulder, then he’d be killed. “So… this is your… room?” Deadpool asked. Claire nodded. “Yep! Papa’s stomach is really soft and warm!” “I can tell. But aren’t you a tad bit… well… disgusted?” “Not really. Only when he eats, yes, but I’m used to it. He usually spits me out when we’re going to have a meal… I guess his hard day made him forgot about me today.” “... I think it may have been my fault.” He tapped his fingers awkwardly. “And how did you get in here?” “... I got into a fight and your… papa… swallowed me on accident. … Is there any way out?” Deadpool asked. Claire pointed to bottom hole in the stomach that lead to Big Mac’s small intestine. “Right.” “Uh… you may want to wait until the morning. I tried it once and… it wasn't pretty, to say the least.” She shuddered. “Yikes.” Deadpool shivered from the thought. “Well um,.. What do we do to pass the time?” “...Tea party?” Claire smiled setting up a plastic pink table on the fleshy island making a squishing sound. She laid out the table with a white table matt and put down two white plastic tea cups and one tea ladle. “....A tea party in a stallion’s stomach,.... I’m in!” Deadpool smiled giving a double thumbs up sitting down by the table. “You should dress appropriately.” After some dressing up Deadpool was dressed in a bright pink princess dress with tiara on his head he held his tea cup holding his pinkie out. “Oh absolutely smashing tea.” Deadpool sipped his cup. “Thank you, Madam Deadpool of the Deadpoolness.” Claire was dressed in gentleman’s tuxedo as she poured him another cup of tea. “I must say your looking quite beautiful today.” “Oooooo~ Thank you. I am quite beautiful today aren’t I?” Deadpool fanned himself with a fan. “Have you brought the guests of honor?” She asked, pulling out a plush bunny with a top hat. “I most certainly did.” Deadpool pulled up a plush toy of Ryan Reynolds. “Excellent! And any moment now, Papa will get up and sleep eat.” “Oh isn’t that a bit dangerous for you?” Deadpool asked holding his Ryan Reynolds plush close to him making it squeak. “Nope. I’m use to it.” ---- Big Macintosh flinched in his bed a bit and then got up. His eyes were closed and he stumbled around a bit. He stomped out of his room, going down the hallway and walking downstairs, making his way to the kitchen. The freezer light brightened the whole kitchen. Big Mac grabbed some of the leftover sandwiches and cake his family had made two days prior. He held them all in his arms flopping them onto the table, where Big Mac then chopped down on all the food, swallowing it all with loud gulps and ferocious eating sounds. Somewhere in the kitchen, a group of Tiny burglar snuck around on the kitchen floor, but all stopped when they saw the red stallion eating like wild animal. Big Mac, still asleep, stopped stumbling a bit and came into the light; his mouth was covered in ketchup but to the Tiny burglars it looked like fresh blood. “Everyone! Run for your lives!” The head burglar shouted as they all scattered in different places. The stomach churned and groaned loudly, followed by a loud groan. “You may want to brace yourself.” Claire spoke, pointing up. Deadpool looked up, seeing that he was below the stomach’s entrance. “...Bugger.” He said before a chewed up sandwich flopped onto him. “Ooh! Peanut Butter Jelly! Oh, if some people are outside, then they’d think Papa’s a blood thirsty killer.” The kitchen was in chaos as everyone ran for their lives, each screaming their heads off as Big Mac stumbled around, seemingly like a monster to their eyes. His collisions could be heard as Deadpool and Claire had bits of non chewed, still dry bits of the sandwich with their tea. “Easy there, big guy!” Deadpool spoke up before turning back to Claire. “I do say, is your father this clumsy when he’s sleep walking?” “Eeyup. Took me awhile to get used to this.” “Like Californians!” Deadpool took a piece of bread off his head. “I… guess so.” She sipped some tea. “And how is your guest doing?” “Considering the fact that we’re getting a sequel, I’d say he’s happy without the song happy playing on repeat.” “... Okay... are you a superhero or something?” “The mask? Eh, kinda. I am on a mission to find some lost kid, but I kinda got side tracked. I gotta say, if I were able to, I’d live on your Papa’s butt!” “... Are you crazy?” “Plenty! That, and we’re part of some Fanfic where the author REALLY loves butts!” Hey! “Oh hush! ♬You love big butss and you cannot lie!♬” Are you done? “Never.” Claire stared awkwardly. “... I’ll just leave you be with your imaginary friend.” she said. The place shook violently with a loud boom, making both jump. The acids around began to bubble, each popping. “Uh oh.” She covered her ears. “Fire in the hole!!!” The bandits ran out of the house, not getting anything. Big Mac flopped onto the couch with his back on it. His stomach let out a loud growl, followed by something going up to his mouth. ~~BURP!!!~~ Deadpool and Claire were fired right out of Big Mac’s mouth and into the air. Wade screamed, but Claire laughed as they fell and landed on Big Mac’s snoring belly. The stallion snored away again, not feeling the two, and not realizing all the crumbs and jelly around his face. “That was awesome! You can charge that as a ride.” Deadpool giggled happily squeezing his Ryan plush making it squeak. Deadpool stayed in that happy pose, but still peeled off a bit of food stuck to him. “Yeah. I always try to convince Papa to let others in, but he only lets me in.” Claire shrugged pulling some of the eaten food out of her hair. “Someday, I’m sure Papa will be open to the idea and have himself a nice bowl of my friends, and let out a burp to end all burps.” “... Who’s the weird one again?” Deadpool chuckled. “Hey! Don’t judge; you're the weirdo who’s in love with my Papa’s butt.” “And the author as well.” Deadpool winked. DEADPOOL! “Oh don’t deny it! I’ve seen your internet history.” And I’ve seen yours as well. “Touche`.” Claire just looked confused as she watched Deadpool arguing with his imaginary friend. She just sat down in Big Mac’s belly fur as Deadpool started ranting on about something with his friend. “Oh shoot are you doing stuff without me?” Deadpool stopped and looked over at Claire. “Sorry kiddo. What do you wanna do now?” “... I’m going back to bed.” She stood up and walked to Big Mac’s open mouth. Without even hesitating, she jumped in, letting the merc watch her, as a bulge in his throat, go down into his stomach. Deadpool laid down, listening to the stallion’s stomach, hearing a little splash and a low grumbling as Big Mac’s stomach growled. “... I might as well follow.” He too ran into Big Mac’s mouth and proceeded to be swallowed himself. He stopped at the edge of the throat, hanging onto a molar. “Buuuuut… the butt is open… I bet the writer would love me to be in between his butt cheeks… and have him wear an underwear, keeping me stuck in between them, and wear long, socks, and-” STOP!!! “Aww come on! You know you’d like it.” He bounced his eyebrows suggestively. I can tell Princess Luna about your internet history! “Wrong Deadpool.” He looked down into the throat. “My arms are getting tired. Do you want me in between Mac’s cheeks or what?” Just,.. Just do whatever you want,... ~Sigh~ “Yaaaaay!” He climbed up, using the teeth as ladders, popped out of Mac’s mouth, and ran to his tail. “♬Swiggity Swooty! I’m coming for the booty!!!♬” Deadpool leaped into the air, playfully grabbing onto Big Mac’s tail, swinging around frantically and landed on the couch cushion. Almost as if some God was paying attention, Big Mac turned to lie on his chest, showing the titanic flanks. “Yes… they’re beautiful!” He reached out and grabbed the butt. “... Hopefully, I don’t go in too deep.” He ran in and squeezed himself in between Big Mac’s cheeks, seemingly disappearing from the world. Luckily, Mac had cleaned himself already, and didn't have beans prior to his sleep. “Oh yeah… This is heaven… happy, writer?” ~Sigh~ Yes. Are you happy now? “You bet! It would be 10 times better if Mac was a chick!” I’m sure you’ll get lucky. “Hey, I’m sure if I’m going to have to find this kid, I’m going to have to get to the bottom of this… heh… bottom.” Deadpool joked, giving the left cheek a high five. Thankfully, it wasn’t enough to wake Big Mac. “So is this a huge voraphillia/butt fic for the readers? One that happens stars me?” Well, it was going to be more than that. It was going to be something serious, but you have a knack for making things more,... Off track. “Serious!? Me!? Last time that happened, Fox had to cancel all the X-Men Origin movies! Now, I have my movies, and I’m in between the flanks of Big Mac. I say seriousness doesn’t pay off in the long run.” Deadpool relaxed on the right cheek, kicking back as the left squeezed on him a bit, almost squishing him. “Ah… this is the life.” You do know there’s an even more trained assassin out there looking for the boy you're looking for. Maybe you should get into that more? “In a moment. He thinks I’m dead and I should use that to my advantage. And besides, you know you’ll love this when someone decides to draw or animate this… perhaps yourself?” I’m s**t when it comes to art. “Wow, so negative. And the cover isn’t yours?” He yawned. “We can discuss about this later in the next chapter. I need my beauty sleep.” Deadpool yawned again and closed his eyes snuggling up to the chubby warm cheek and fell asleep. To Be Continued. > Chapter 3. A Pain In The Butt > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Big Macintosh snored in his sleep. It was a peaceful sleep, despite his guest’s bizarre behavior. The stallion kept to his sleep, half covered in his blanket, and drooling a bit on his pillow as his mouth hung open, leaving a loud snore to escape out from his throat. Big Mac’s legs kicked a bit in his sleep as he turned in his sleep leaving his back exposed. In between Big Macintosh’s butt cheeks, or, more specifically, in his buttcrack, Deadpool slept. He snuggled up on Mac’s left butt cheek, along with his unicorn plushie that was tucked under his arm, as he slept with happy grin on his face as he cuddled the enormous red cheek in his sleep. He was lucky that Mac didn't had to let out gas, or had to do his business, and go through the embarrassment. This was probably the best sleep he had. Wade practically slept like a baby. “But babies cry a lot and poop themselves.” He corrected. It's an expression. “Well someone better correct that ASAP! Along with the other fake things people say!” Aren't you suppose to be asleep? “I was, but the next chapter started.” Right… well, the sunlight came in and hit Big Macintosh in his eyes. He groaned as he woke up, slowly getting up, and letting out a long, deep yawn. As soon as he got up, Deadpool was crushed in between the buttcheeks and held firmly. Were it not have been the spell, Wade would've been a bloody mess, or wouldn't be able to breath. “... Ow…” Big Macintosh pulled the covers off him and slipped out of his bed with a thump of his hooves hitting the wooden floor. His bed head mane almost covered his eyes, reminding him he should get a haircut someday. After rubbing his eyes to get the morning goop out, he almost forgot about his guest. Big Mac sighed loudly, wishing he didn’t have to wake the odd Tiny, but it was the crack of dawn and he needed to get up. “...So what do ya’ll want for breakf-......” Big Mac froze seeing Deadpool missing from his bowl bed. “Oh no. The little monster’s loose! Were could be?” Big Mac sweated nervously looking under his bed and night stand not seeing any trace of the costumed Tiny. He began to worry, searching under the pillows, blankets, and mattress, but not finding him anywhere. The nervous stallion burped a bit, remembering his daughter, who he forgot to take out last night. Big Macintosh brought his hoof to his lips and soon swallowed a gulp of air. After a few seconds, his stomach grumbled and his face swelled up. His maw opened wide, letting out a monstrous burp, sending the little girl flying out of his mouth. Thankfully, she landed in Big Mac’s grasp, albeit, a bit dazed. She looked up to see her giant Papa smiling at her. “Morning Papa.” Claire smiled warmly, running up to her Papa’s lip chin and giving it a hug. “Morning sugar cube.” Big Macintosh gave her a gentle kiss on the head, his enormous lip almost smothering her whole head. “Sorry I forgot to let ya out last night sweetie.” “It’s ok Papa.I had fun with a new friend last night.” Big Mac’s eyes widen he almost turned a shade of white. “What kind of new friend?” Big Mac asked worried he knew who she was talking about and gulped nervously. “A weird man, I think he was a superhero” Claire rubbed her chin thinking. “What did he do?” Big Mac asked sounding worried but angry at the same time. “... We just had a tea party, Papa, honestly...” Claire felt a little uneasy. “Th,.. That’s all? Just a tea party? He didn’t hurt you?... Or anything like that?” “Nope. Just tea time with me, him and Mr. Fluffles,.... Um, where is Mr. Fluffles?” Big Mac paused for a moment. “Oh,... Hang on.” Big Mac moved his tongue around his mouth going into his rows of teeth until he found the bunny plush toy stuck between his molars. He used his tongue, getting it out, then opened his mouth showing a soggy Mr. Fluffles. “Thank you Papa.” Claire reached in grabbing the sloppy plush. “So what happened to the man? Is he still in my belly?” “Nope. When you were having a late night snack you burped us out, I went back into sleep but he stayed out.” Big Mac sighed. “Well I’m just gonna have to find him later. I just hope he doesn't try and steal anything.” Big Mac gently placed Claire on his nose and began his walk down the stairs. However, Deadpool felt himself being grinded in between Big Mac’s cheeks. It was painful at first, but the merc soon enjoyed it, finding it as a weird, but good feeling massage. “Oh yeah~...” He moaned. The cheeks pressed and smothered against his tiny form, squeezing on him and popping his back a bit. “Oh~ That got the bad kink out.” Deadpool cheered as the cheeks continued to squeeze and smother him with every step Big Mac took. Big Macintosh entered the kitchen, setting Claire on the kitchen table and started cooking up breakfast. For her, Big Mac had cooked up a batch of pancakes. As he flipped them, letting them cook and sizzle, he looked around the kitchen, incase he were to spot Wade. “If yer around, You're gonna miss some of the flapjacks I’m making.” He called out hoping that would get his attention. Big Mac’s mention of flapjacks made Deadpool’s eyes widen “Wait! Flapjacks? PAAAANCAKES!” Deadpool was ready to exit his cheeky home (pun intended), but unfortunately, Deadpool could not break free from tight grip of the double red cheeks. “What! No. No. No. No. NO! NO! NO!” Deadpool tried to squeeze out, the stallion’s buttcheeks kept him pressed and imprisoned. “Dang. Thought that would work.” Big Mac snorted. He put the first pancake on a plate, lathering it with syrup and a slice of butter. He walked over to Claire, who was ready with a tuff of napkin tucked in the collar of her shirt and her tiny silverware, plate and table. Big Mac cut the pancake up into smaller slices for Claire and left the bigger half for himself. “Mmm. These look great Papa~” Claire giggled happily. “Eeyup.” Big Mac nodded pulling out a seat. Still in the stallion’s crack Deadpool fought and thrashed. He put both hands on each cheek and used what strength he had and pulled the cheeks apart only a few inches apart from each other determined to for pancakes. “Almost,... Ugh!... Just gotta keep,..” Deadpool pushed trying to get loose. Big Mac set his plate down adding a few more pancakes before finally having enough he could eat, he walked over to his seat and sat down into the wooden chair with thud. “Ahh!.....” Deadpool was squeezed by the titanic cheeks now squishing him from all sides holding him in place. “Agh!.... My back…. My Legs… My everything.... Not sure if Gusta.” It was only five minutes, but it felt like an eternity to the mercenary. Both Mac and Claire finished their breakfast, with some burps, leading to the stallion to stand back up and taking Claire to school. “Ech! School…” Deadpool gagged. “I doubt the education system is better here than on earth. But who am I to judge? I’m already in a horse’s ass.” It was quicker than breakfast, with Macintosh saying Goodbye to Claire as she went to class. He trotted on back to the farm to continue with his chores. If there's one thing Deadpool knew, it's that Big Mac is a workhorse, and not only will he be moving a lot, but he’ll also be sweating a lot. “EWW!!! ASS SWEAT!!!” Deadpool could only get his right arm free. “Woo-hoo!!!” But it was deeper. “D’ho!” However, Macintosh stopped as a large crowd surrounded City Hall. He was a simple stallion, not paying much attention to the world outside of the barn, but on stage was Blueblood, Celestia’s royal nephew. “Why isn't Celestia here!?” The normally bubbly pink mare, Pinkie Pie, whined. "She's the guest of honor for the Ponyville Festival!” “For the last time!” Blueblood yelled “She's running late! And I can't blame her for delaying her visit to you filthy peasants!” The crowd murmured in anger. “Especially to you!!!” he pointed at Macintosh. Big Mac sweated nervously looking left and right and realized who the spoiled prince was pointing too. “Um,.....” The prince glared at the town's folks making them all mumble words at the uptight Prince. Blueblood conjured up a hazmat suit and approached to the Apple family member. “Ugh! Just look at him: Dirt is everywhere on him!” Big Macintosh just rolled his eyes started to walk away, Deadpool couldn’t help but overhear the whole conversation. “Really b***h!? Why that stuck up little punk!” Deadpool managed to squeeze the cheeks out a bit and hold his left hand up to his mouth and shout. “Better be careful taking a shower! Cause with how much you hold your nose, your mouth spews out s**t!” Big Mac, along with the whole crowd, gasped loudly, Big Mac paused almost freezing on step. He turned around to see a angry Blue Blood now face to face. “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME!?” “I,... I didn’t say,..” “Yes you did! The whole crowd and I heard you!” Blue Blood snorted pulling up his sleeves. “So, dirt farmer, you want to fight? That’s fine with me.” “Please. I really think you shouldn’t,..” Big Mac was suddenly caught off when the crowd started chanting his name and whistling for him to fight. “Ah’ Come on, big brother! Teach that uptight wuss a lessth!” Applejack’s voice could be heard in the crowd. Big Mac stood, not wanting to throw one of his devastating punches. Blueblood stood on his hind legs and began to use his front hooves as fists. “What's wrong? Chicken!?” Blueblood taunted. “Nobody calls him chicken.” Deadpool growled. He pulled his katana out with his right hand and pointed it deeper past. Big Mac’s Butt crack. “Hope it works” He poked in deeper with his sword. “Now, sir,” Mac spoke. “Ah don't wanna-” He felt something sharp poke in the entrance of his exit. The stallion screamed as he delivered a punch to the prince (causing him to go flying through several buildings), flinched his plot, and ran to get whatever it was in out. Big Mac ran till he was out of sight in town hall. He reached a single tree in PonyVille park, where he backed his plot onto the tree and rubbed into it until whatever sharp it was came out. He had no luck with scooting his butt across the tree and grabbed a stick in grass, poking it between his cheeks, fishing around till he felt something and pulled it out. Big Mac brought the stick around to see what it was and on the stick was the Tiny, Wade, who was now hanging by a rip in his suit, on by one of the limbs of the stick. “Hi Big guy.” Deadpool waved happily at the shocked stallion. Big Macintosh’s barred his teeth and his eyes become a bright raging red steam puffed from his nostrils covering Deadpool. “Ahh. I knew you were the Armored Titan!” “ARE YOU INSANE!?” Big Mac roared stabbing the stick in the ground with Deadpool still hanging by it. “Um… A little yeah.” “Now thanks to you! I could be spending the rest of my life in prison!” “Hey. The guy insulted you first, you're fine bro.” “I might still be trouble. And what the heck were doing back there!” “Sleeping, duh! Who could resist sleeping in those thick, meaty butt cheeks? … I know the author can't.” “Ugh… You're too much.” Big Mac hoof palmed himself. “You're better off on your own. I’m not getting into anymore trouble because of you.” “Aww pwease, give me another chance.” Deadpool begged. Big Mac’s angry glare started turning to a sympathetic. “Well…….” Big Mac lowered his muzzle down to Deadpool’s level. Deadpool reached out and squeezed his muzzle. “Honk!” “Nope.” Big Mac pulled away, walking around the stick so that his back was facing behind the stick. “Good luck with yourself.” Big Mac raised his back leg and with one good, buck kicked Deadpool sending him flying through the air. “Shooting Stars!!!” Music played as Deadpool flailed around. With some really bad green screen edits, he went from flying in the air, to in space, passing Galactus from the crappy Fantastic 4 movie, passing the real galactus, passing Oatu the Watcher, flying by the twin towers, a giant dog head with human legs, up until he smacked into a wall. “...Ow…” Deadpool went flat on impact. Deadpool grabbed the back of his head, peeling himself off the wall before falling off and hitting the ground. “...Ow..” Deadpool pulled himself up off the ground, snapping and cracking his bones back into place. He looked around, seeing the tall cartoonish building he saw. He left a tiny human sized mark on the yellow brick wall. “THE HORROR!” A female voice yelled out. Deadpool turned to see he had left a dent on a daisy bending the petal “Really?” Deadpool shrugged while rolling his eyes. Looking down at the flower was a pink coat colored mare with a blond mane and tail, Deadpool pulled out one of his pistols taking shots at the daisy taking bits and pieces of the daisy apart with each shot. “NO! NO! NO! WHY CRUEL WORLD! WHHHY!?!?!?” The mare let out a loud gasps and fell backwards into the ground with a thud. “Well this was pointless. Or I could say…. Petal-less.” Sunglasses appeared on Deadpool’s face along with the sound of loud man shouting 'YEEEEAAAAHH!' with a guitar rift. “Alright, that’s enough of that. Now… where’s that kid? I gotta get a nice paycheck ASAP!” Deadpool saw the fallen mare lying beside. She was still passed out. He shrugged and began his walk. Soon, loud and thundering hoof stomps alerted Deadpool of the arrival of more ponies. A orange mare with dark yellow mane and tail, along with a smaller, bright yellow one with a red mane and tail, both hovered over her, gasping in fear. “Lily! Who could’ve done this to you?” The tan one cried out, holding the unconscious Daisy. The other pink one stopped Deadpool, scanning him. “Hey! You um,... are you a Tiny?” “I don’t know. Are you a giant?” He replied with a bit of sass in his tone. She was about to speak. “Ah! Don’t answer that! Rhetorical question, Daisy.” The mare looked confused. Her eyebrow raised up, staring down at him. shivered, shaking her hoof slowly. “Lily! Lily! Speak to me! What happened!?” The orange one shook her limp body. “You do know you can just say their names, right, author?” Deadpool asked. Lily slowly pointed her hoof at Deadpool. I forgot their names, ok!? They're background characters. I don’t pay much attention to them. “RACIST!!!” Don’t start that! “It's true! You Species-ist!” Ok fine. Wanna play that!? We’ll play that. Soon the two mares stared down at Deadpool with fiery flares burning in their eyes. Their cute, cartoonish faces turned into a wrinkled angry frown. Their perfect white teeth grinned each other as they shot daggers at the tiny Anit-Hero, their massive faces now made Deadpool feel even more smaller than before. “... Wait! I’m a friend to Big Mac!” He pleaded, getting onto his knees “I was with him last night and a bit today! PLEEESE!!! Don’t hurt me!!!” You brought this on yourself. “Sexist! He only likes males!!” The orange one yelled. “How would you know that?” Deadpool asked “Did you even ask who he was in to? Or at least, stalk him enough? Like the main singer of Maroon 5 when he made Animals?” “We know him more than you do, freak!” Roseluck growled. The two mares got into a pouncing position, ready to take the Merc down. However, he grabbed a flower and held a knife to it’s ‘neck’. “Back off! Both of you! Or else this flower gets it!” “Y,.. YOU MONSTER!” Lily quickly snapped awake, holding out her hoof at Deadpool, looking shocked. He backed away, but looked around crazily. “Oh, we can do this peacefully! You all back off, or this flower fails to see a couple’s dinner table!” Deadpool kept walking backwards suddenly it started moving? The flower’s head turned around its ‘face’, now facing Deadpool. It had black eyes with white pupils, with a mouth suddenly appearing and smiled disturbingly. “When did I land in Alice in Wonderland? … Or Tim Burton’s Grown Up Alice returns to Underland?" Deadpool asked himself “Hi,.... There,.... I’m,... Flowey,... The Friendly,.... Flower.” It smiled widely along with a few cracking and snapping sounds. “KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!” He screamed, throwing the flower to the floor and pulling a flamethrower out, burning it to a crisp. The flower, and the mares, screamed their heads off. They all fainted. “... Why did you have to add Undertale to this? We get it, you’re a huge Undertale fan, but that game’s been dead after 2015!” Because I can. So there. “... Eh, fair enough.” He threw the flamethrower down and ran away from the ‘crime scene’. “Now where’s that kid!? I’m getting distracted with all this stuff! What’s next? Ness from Earthbound arriving?” As Deadpool ran he spotted a pony with a pink coat and a white mane walking to the market place and on her back was a boy where a baseball cap and wearing a blue and yellow T-Shirt, and on his back was a backpack and baseball bat. “Dude,..... Really?” I AM GOD! “A god of losers.” An anvil fell on his head. “... ow… look, I know we got on the wrong foot, but can we at LEAST work together to get that kid? I need details on what he looks like… and I apologize if I assumed their gender.” Well, alright, since it’s a kid involved. As long as Death Stroke doesn't find him hopefully he’ll be fine. “Knowing you, you’ll probably have unfunny me take him away as soon as I’m close.” Hey, unlike you, he’s not my meat puppet. I can’t control him. “That’s the biggest lie since Obama said he’ll bring change.” Hey! You really think I can control him I have problems just telling you what to do. “Except I can choose to ignore them or not. But we’re getting a distracted here; that kid and Deathstroke are out there, and I’ve got the strangest feeling that I’m gonna get eaten any second now!” Deadpool suddenly felt the ground shake. The tiniest pebbles bounced up and down as the earth around him trembled, he looks up to see the flower mares charging right for him, all of them fuming with rage. Deadpool screamed, running away as some guy gave him a motivational speech. Deadpool screamed, flailing his arms wildly as the giants chased after him. Roseluck leaned her head down sapping her jaws at him, just missing his butt. “AHHHHH!” Deadpool held his hands up to his face and let out a girly scream. The raging mares snapped at Deadpool and slammed their hooves down at him, attempting to squish him, just missing him by an inch. Deadpool reached into his pocket looking for something. Anything! He pulled out two smoke bombs. “Ah ha! DISTRACTION!!!” He threw the two at Lily and Daisy’s faces. Both of their faces were covered in a bright colored smoke. They stopped and coughed at the smoke. However, Roseluck stomped onto Deadpool, pinning him to the ground. She breathed heavily. “Well… what… do you… have to say?” “... Uh… Oh! I was in Big Mac’s butt!” Roseluck paused. Her angry face disappeared, being replaced with a dumbfounded shocked look. She stared down at Deadpool for a minute, lifting her hoof she walked backwards her face blushing red. “Oh yeah! I was in between his buttcheeks! If you’re thinking of eating me, then you’re also eating Big Mac’s ass! … Something that, if I were normal sized, and if he didn’t have Claire… and if this was M-rated, then I’d do that in a pinch! Or… Yo! Readers! Make a fic where I eat Big Mac’s booty like groceries! Just e-mail it to me at-” Roseluck just gagged at the Tiny in full disgust. She looked as if she was about to vomit. “You know wha,... *GAG* …. I’m not… *Cough* that… hungry.” “Ooh! I also got pictures!” He pulled out a photo, which had Deadpool talking a selfie right between Big Mac’s cheeks. “Oh man, it was SO soft in there! Like, you wouldn’t believe how soft it was! It was like being gently crushed by two of the most softest beds you’ve ever been in, and-” Roseluck screamed and ran away. He blinked. Some of the other mares and stallions around stared, most with disgusted looks, and others looking like they were gonna puke. “... What? Is it wrong for a guy to have a man crush?" He asked, standing back up. “Now! To find someone who can help!” His sight immediately caught sight of a certain purple alicorn, reading a book of some sort. “A-ha! Purple smart! She and her friends can help!" He ran over to her, but jumped into her tail, vanishing from the crowd. Twilight returned with a book about teleportations and various dimensions. While a good majority was useful, none of it was helpful with finding the Tinies a way back to their world. Yet, despite the near impossible odds, she wasn’t quite ready to give up on how the humans can get back to their world, and possibly have Equestria visit them. Turns out, trying to find their world will probably require all of Equestria’s most powerful unicorns and alicorns, but it may still not be enough. She entered her castle, where a good four of her friends were present; Pinkie Pie made herself a house of cards, Applejack had herself an apple, Rarity knitted a small dress in her magic, and Fluttershy cooed the boy that Twilight and Starlight had with them. Spike, Twilight’s assistant, and baby dragon, arrived with a list, followed by Starlight. “Ok,” he spoke. “So are you sure it’s not some sort of brain thing?” “Spike, we’ve been over this!” Starlight exasperated “There’s nothing wrong with Cody!” “And are you sure it may be because of Stacy?” “We’ve been over this already! Until we find another ‘horse’ that came from their world and became a pony like us, it’s the most likely thing to get the Tinies back to their home.” “And how many tests have you done?” Starlight glared at him. “... Ok! I’m just asking.” “Th-this isn’t gonna hurt? Cody asked. “Not in the slightest!” Twilight reassured, lowering her book. “Now, where’s your friend, Cody?” “Right here!” Another voice spoke. The door to the house of cards opened and out came another boy. “Whew! Who knew a bed of cards was so refreshing?” “Of course it wouldn’t be, silly!” Pinkie replied “That’s why I used marshmallows!” “Hold up!” Deadpool’s voice broke through. “2 kids named Cody!? HUZZAH!!! THE CODYS HAVE BEEN DOUBLED!!!” “... What was that?” Applejack asked. Her hat was lifted as Deadpool was on her mane. “That would be me, Applejacks-doesn’t-taste-like-apples cereal.” He teleported away. “Say wha-?” Applejack asked, completely dumbfounded. The house of cards fell down as Deadpool kicked the door down. “Somebody once told me the world was gonna roll me, I ain’t the sharpest tool in the shed!” “Ooh! I love that song!” Pinkie cheered. “Although, I find it very funny that it became popular with Shrek and not the movie it was made for, Mystery Men.” “Oooo~ I’ve seen that movie too.” Cody shouted out randomly. “My mom always told me to where layers in winter because of that.” Deadpool appeared next to him, wearing the ears of the famous ogre. “Ogres have layers.” He spoke in a scottish accent. “... What is happening?” Starlight asked, confused at the sight. “Is that tiny teleporting everywhere?” Deadpool appeared on her muzzle. “You bet on it, whiney girl.” “... Whiney!?” He teleported onto her mane. “My boyfriend left because he got his butt tattoo, so I want everyone to be equal!” He put on a Soviet Commander hat with a thick mustache. “Равенство будет процветать!!!” “Wow, that sounds like a super villain.” Cody said while looking at a comic book he somehow had in his hand. Deadpool teleported back to him, back to his normal outfit. “You bet on it. But, it seems that trying to take over the world by causing a time travel rift gets you off easily with the only consequence being that you get advance your education via friendship.” Both Twilight and Starlight stared, completely lost in translation. “... Um… why are you here?” Fluttershy asked. “Oh! That’s easy!” He grabbed both Codys. “I’m in search of a lost boy! He’s a huge fan of me, and I get to become stinking rich while doing the technical right thing! And, if my guess is right… his name is also Cody.” Everypony stared at him. “... Ooh! I think I know where to find him!” Pinkie spoke, waving her hooves. “You do!” “Yeah! The next scream that yells ‘Why are you doing this, Rainbow Dash!?’.” “Really? When’s that gonna happen?” “Why are you doing this, Rainbow Dash!?” The screaming voice of a boy yelled in fear. “... Oh. ...Well, thanks!”[/color ]He ran through a window, making a perfect silhouette of his body like a cartoon character. “Aw… now I wanna be a main character.” Pinkie groaned. “Maybe next time Pinks!” Deadpool landed outside of the castle, with a few shards sticking out of him. He brushed the remaining shards off his body, looking around for the source of the screaming. Deadpool jumped, seeing Rainbow Dash chasing a boy. She was gaining on him, snapping at him with her huge teeth, almost snatching him out with one bite. “Hey! Stop!!!” Deadpool ran, then teleported next to the kid. Deadpool reached out trying to grab him by the collar as Rainbow Dash’s wide open maw overshadowed them. Deadpool snatched him up and teleported, leaving Rainbow Dash to snap her jaws down into thin air and crash into a nearby pole. The two landed on a nearby rooftop. Wade did a superhero pose. “Another child has been saved!” He spoke in a stereotypical, heroic voice. “WH,...” The kid looked over at Deadpool in shock. “YO,.. YOU?” “Yes… me… you.” “DE- Deadpool!” The kid managed. “Are you real?” “As real as your name is Cody!... Am I right?” “How,... Um,. Yes,...” Cody managed to say “I knew it! I'm the best! Gimme 5, man!” He extended his hand out, offering a high five to Cody. Cody gave Deadpool his five, still in total disbelief. “There we go! Now to get you back home to your family!” Deadpool was about to use his teleportor when a sudden blast of wind caught both Deadpool and Cody off guard. Standing above them was Rainbow Dash looking down at them. “Alright then!” She spoke with a hungry smile. “Looks like I'm having 2 Tinies for the price of one!” “... I was in Big Mac's butt.” Deadpool spoke. “So eating me is the same as eating Big Mac's Ass.” “Eh. Any Tiny will say anything to keep me from eating them.” “... Alright, only one thing to do.” He pulled out a banana. “DISTRACTION!!!” He threw the banana, which only landed a few feet from Rainbow Dash. She looked confused at the banana. “... Uh… what the heck is that-” She looked up, seeing that they were gone. “... Hey! No fair!” Somewhere near another building, a flash of light dropped Deadpool and kid beside a half eaten apple in the alley way, they both crashed into the ground with a thud. “Ah man. I always wanted to meet Rainbow Dash, I never thought the first time I met her she’d try to kill me.” Cody said, looking confused as he got up. [color=#be4343"]Eh. It happens. I met Big Macintosh, got eaten by him, and got between his buttcheeks.” “W-what!? Y-you were-?” “Yep! Why else do I smell so salty?” Cody turned green, wanting to turn and throw up. “Hey! He didn’t fart on me! Or had to do his business… or even on me, I didn’t go TOO far.” “Ok… that’s enough.” “Fair enough. Now come on! We need to get you home and end this fic early! Unless the author, Cody, wants to add something to this.” “A-Are you doing that thing where you talk to things that aren't there?” Cody asked while watching Deadpool. “.....Uh….” “It’s ok. I think it’s funny when you talk to yourself. I do that all the time.” “You got a lot to learn kiddo.” Deadpool gave Cody a pat on the back. Deadpool raised up his wrist ready to teleport himself and Cody. He pressed the button making it beep. A portal appeared, and soon, an image of a playground appeared. Deadpool smiled happily ready to walk through…. The portal suddenly glitched out of existence, vanishing from sight in a zap and pop. Deadpool’s eyes widened, a huge frown could be seen through his mask, Cody stood behind him unsure of what just happened. “What the f**k!?” Deadpool swore with the bleep in motion. “Why did this break all of a sudden!?” “....Wha,....?” “My teleporter! It’s like those ones Portals from Stargate! It was working just fine! Why now?!” “... Maybe you were using it too much?” Cody shyly spoke. “....Y,.... Well... I was just teleporting a lot.” Deadpool raised his wrist up looking at the mobile teleporter its lights were off and it was smoking. “Or it’s just easy to destroy.” The familiar voice of Slade spoke. Deadpool looked up, only to get a hard kick to his face, knocking him down. Oh $&%# “OH! NOW YOU SHOW UP!?!?!?” Deadpool yelled at the author. Slade clicked his sniper rifle aiming it at Deadpool’s head. Deadpool quickly pulled out another gadget clicking it and out came a bright blue holographic shield with Captain America’s symbol on it. Slade fired his rifle, but to which the holographic shield was easily able to make it bounce off and hit the nearby wall instead. “Thank you, Steve Jr.” Deadpool spoke, throwing the shield at Slade. It knocked his opponent to the floor below “Whoa!” Cody yelled hiding behind Deadpool. “Deathstroke?!” “Yeah. But he’s not having a stroke.” Ba-Dum-Crash! Deadpool and Deathstoke looked up, seeing a running pony stomping their way, Deadpool quickly dashed at Slade while he was distracted punching him in the gut and bashed the shield into his chin and then quickly tossed Slade into the ground near to the running pony’s hooves. With a loud BOOM!, Slade was stomped down into the muddy ground by the giant hoof, and was picked up, sticking to the bottom of the hoof. “That was aweso-” Cody was about to yell with excitement only to be picked up by Deadpool running to a nearby dumpster dodging the pony’s hooves. “That won’t stop him for long. Let’s go!” The pony that stepped on Slade was none other than Ponyville’s local teacher, Ms. Cheerilee. She was on her way, returning to school with a few new books that she’d use to teach the foals. However, she stopped as she felt something stuck in her hooves. All she did was shrug, figuring it was just another pebble. However, she gasped when she saw a tiny in armor was stuck underneath her left front hoof. “Oh my! I-I’m so sorry!” She pleaded. “I didn’t see you there Mr…” “I,.. Don’t ,... Have,.. Time,... For this!” Slade peeled himself off the frog of her hoof, flopping to the ground. Cheerilee picked him back up. “Oh, but I must apologize to you! Ooh! I can make you dinner for tonight! Pea Soup sound good?” “Stop talking,... To me,.. Beast,...” Slade tried moving but couldn’t. “Oh, I insist.” Cheerilee smiled opening her saddle bag and dropping Slade inside. The cheerful mare smiled patting the bag and walking off to go to her house. Deadpool inspected it through his binoculars. “D’aww… a very angry midget is going to be great friends with the local teacher.” He spoke. “Is the coast clear?” Cody asked staying close to the wall. “Yeah where safe, no need to find bud.” Deadpool smiled putting away his binoculars. Cody walked out beside him, looking up, seeing all the giant ponies around them. “Wow. You know, I always thought they would be the size of real horses. Not giants!” Cody said in nervous ton. “Eh, this is an unofficial crossover to MrAquino’s Tales from Tinies fanfic on Fimfiction.Net.” He spoke, sounding like a robot to my friend’s username to the end, as I’m totally not trying to get you guys to read my friend’s fic. “.....Huh?.. I feel like I’m going to go cross eyed.” Cody said looking absolutely confused. “This is why you don’t sell yourself out.” “It's a bad idea anyway. You're pretty much selling your soul.” Cody added in. “But I’m a ginger!” Bum-bum-buuum!!! Both the tiny humans felt the ground shake and suddenly stop they could see a shadow looming over them. “Deadpool. I’m afraid to turn around.” “Oh don’t worry, me too.” Deadpool and Cody slowly turned around, only to be meet with the angry face of Rainbow Dash. “Well... I’ll see that in my nightmares.” Cody’s eyes widened as he shook instance “Me too.” Deadpool simply added. “Alright then…” Rainbow huffed. “No more games! Mr. Stomach is long overdue with a date with one of you 2.” “What do we do now!?” Cody asked, backing away. “Easy.” Deadpool grabbed Cody and threw him away! He turned to Rainbow Dash. “Come on! Do it! Do it! I’m open!” Ooooo a Predator reference. “With a pinch of Men in Black.” He jumped up and down. “Right here! Eat me! EAT ME!!!” “D-Deadpool no!” Cody begged from a distance. Rainbow Dash smiled evilly, getting in a pouncing position. Her teeth bared as she smiled. She ran for Deadpool, opening her maw wide. Deadpool, somehow, was blindfolded and had a lit cigarette in his mouth. CHOMP!!! The tiny mercenary was tossed around the mare’s mouth, who murred at his taste, but stop as he tasted pretty salty. Ugh! Did he even wash his clothes? “Nope!” Deadpool spoke. Rainbow stopped. “Yeah, I’ve been wearing this outfit for about… three days in a row now. Plus, like I said, I was in Big Mac’s butt last night. Man! Looking back at it, that was the best sleep I’ve ever had! No exaggeration either! It was the perfect mix between softness, and firmness, keeping me in place, as he-” “BLECH!!!” Dash spat him out, wiping the tatse off her tongue. “EW! EWW!!! Mac sweat!!!” “Mac butt sweat, to be exact!” “AHH!!!” She turned and flew away. “... Huh… I guess she is a lesbian.” Deadpool turned to Cody who was watching looking dumbfounded, then later on turned red trying to hold in a laugh. “Pfffff,...Hahahahaha!” Cody laughed rolling on his back. “Oh man. It’s good to laugh.” “It’s always better instead of being miserable for all your life.” “Yeah! I can’t believe she didn’t believe you at first! I thought you were a goner!” “Eh, I would’ve find a way out. Perhaps nothing she’d like… do they have buttholes? 2016 was the year where animated character had buttholes, so I figured they’d get one themselves.” “Uh,... I have no idea.” Cody felt a little uneasy about that comment and tried not to think about. “Eh, whatevs. But I got a feeling we’re gonna be here for a while. Hm… I wonder how Twilight would feel about having another Cody in her castle?” “Huh?... I’m really confused.” “Princess Twilight! She has two other kids, also named Cody, living with her in the castle. … Sheesh, was the naming generator that lazy when they wrote their names for those chapters?" “I’ve kinda always wanted to change my name. Cody’s such an average name.” “Oh, and what would you call yourself? Codesque? Coachella? Cod?” “Um no, maybe something that doesn't sound lazy… or… racist.” “... See what you did, Tumblr!? You made this kid PC!!! Now they’re gonna say they sexually identify themselves as an attack helicopter!” “I don’t use Tumblr,... My sister told me to stay away from that site.” Deadpool patted his head. “Good boy… or girl… or attack helicopter.” “Pffff,... Hahaha.” Cody laughed. “I think I’ll just stay a boy.” “Good!” Deadpool patted his head again. “NOW!...... How to survive without getting you snatched up by the giant ponies?” “Oh wow! Another one!” A boy’s voice spoke from above. Deadpool was picked up by a light brownish red colt wearing a swirl propeller hat on his head. He brought Deadpool to his face, smiling innocently at him. “Whoa you're a cool looking one!” “Uh… thanks?” Deadpool replied. “I gotta take you back home! You and your brother will have great adventures together!” “... Brother!?” He was taken away by the colt, Button Mash. “DEADPOOL!” Cody chased after the colt grabbing onto the back of his leg making the colt stop and turn around seeing Cody on his back leg. “Hey! He’s mine! I found him first!” Button gently kicked him off, making Cody fall into the mud. “Please,... d-don’t go!” Cody kept running, trying to stop him. Button Mash looked down at him, snatching him up. “Please he’s my friend don’t take him away!” “No!” He dropped Cody onto a bush’s branch. “He’s mine! Go find your own!” "Why you little-!” Deadpool swore, but had his breath taken away as Button ran from the scene. Cody stared, boggled at what just happened, and unknowing what to do. He cowered as a pony passed by, unknowing if they saw him, and if he was going to be eaten himself. Cody huddled up holding his knees togther as he sat on the branch, he watched all the ponies walking by, feeling frightened for his life. He jumped when the bush suddenly shook knocking him loose. Cody grabbed the branch, some of the ponies brushed up against the bush when they walked by. Time seemed to pass, and soon, his eyes became heavy. Without fighting it, he fell asleep, right near the trunk of the bush, with two of the branches acting as his support. Cody soon felt himself being lifted, almost like nothing had a hold of him. The sudden movement alarmed him to wake up as he saw the stick was moving past him and soon, he found himself floating out of the bush all he saw was the clear night sky and a figure that appeared in the moonlight. Underneath the moonlight was the princess of the night herself, Princess Luna; her dark blue fur seemed to glow, and her mane was almost invisible to the sky. She gently placed her left hoof over his mouth, followed by a soothing shush. “Do not worry.” She cooed in a very loving, motherly voice. “You’re safe with me.” Despite her size, easily towering his, and most of the other ponies, he couldn’t help but smile, feeling safe with her… that is, until she licked her lips. “W-what are you doing?” He asked, a bit unsure as to what she was going to do. “Doing what I always do with my subjects. Keep them safe within me.” “W-within? L-like-?” Luna opened her mouth wide, letting out a noticeable ‘aww!’ sound. Cody was facing down into Luna’s own mouth, seeing the thick webs of saliva around her thick tongue, equally huge teeth, all going down into the abyss that was her throat. He began to flail around. “W-wait! Don’t do this! Luna!!!” The force around him stopped. Gravity took over and he fell into her mouth. “LUNAAA!!!” She closed her mouth as soon as he fell in. With no hesitation, she flicked her head back and swallowed Cody. GLURK! She moaned as she felt him land in her belly. With a flap of her wings, she flew into the sky to look for more lost kids, both to satisfy her hunger, and to keep them safe until their families arrived. > Chapter 4. Bromances? > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Deadpool was carried away by the brown colt, seemingly powerless against him, due to him being huge and a child, something the mercenary wouldn’t dream of harming. He watched as everything around him bounced and swayed around he tried looking for something. Anything to grab onto, or have a chance to run but how? And if it would be safe that didn’t result in a huge explosion. Sure, he could just get a knife out and cut his foot off, but that would be too disturbing for someone so young, and not to mention that it would be both painful, and take a long time for said foot to grow back (though, dressing up as a pirate would work until then). “Not to mention the kid could just scoop me up easier since,... Well, one foot.” Deadpool mumbled crossing his arms. Deadpool saw some advantages at his dilemma at Button Mash’s height. He had a better viewpoint of some of ponies. Deadpool saw a mare walking near she had light gray coat and blond mane and tail with bubbles on her flank. “Derpy! Hey! I got muffins!” “Muffins!?” The mare jumped, looking down at Button Mash she quickly scooped up the colt, with Button screaming, dropping Deadpool. “FREEDOM!!!”  Deadpool screamed suddenly wearing a kilt and having a ginger hair wig on his mask as he ran. Derpy’s gigantic hoof slammed down near him blocking him off. “Ooo~ Do you have muffins little one?” Derpy quickly dropped Button and lowered her head down towards Deadpool she had a bright smile on her muzzle. “Ummmm. Nope. Bye!” Deadpool sudden transformed his legs into a spinning circle (and not fidget spinners) and ran off in a loud video game sound. “Gotta go fast!” Deadpool ran and saw behind him Derpy and Button Mash watching him but her eyes drifted away from him, Deadpool heard a whooshing sound and stopped he looked up. His white eyes went wide as he saw a titanic blue police box sudden appear in front of him. “Ok, now the Sonic reference was pushing it.” Deadpool continued to watch as the TARDIS appeared in full gigantic glory… before crashing into it like a car. Button Mash picked him up, where Deadpool was dazed. “Nice try! But you’re going with the others, especially with your brother!” The two ponies stood and watched as the doors suddenly opened a bright light over took them making them block their view and stood a light brown stallion wearing a multicolored, 5 foot long scarf. “Fezes are cooler than bow ties, bitches.” Deadpool winked. “4th is OTP!” “This one is weird.” Button spoke, opening his house’s front door and entering. The house itself looked pretty normal, though the place was bigger, and many of the stuff was now ponified. Deadpool saw himself entering Button’s room, which is pretty similar to what most young boys rooms are to be expected. The walls were tan colored, with a purple carpet, and various comic books, toys, clothes (mostly his spinning hats), and video game accessories littered the floor. However, the sight that caught Deadpool off guard was something REALLY weird. Laying on the shelves were various jars, each containing licensed comic book characters from Marvel and DC. “Way to be specific.” Button opened one of the jars and dropped him inside it, where he landed on someone familiar. Deadpool landed with a thud on someone wearing a red and blue costume. They both collapsed into each other landing at the bottom of the jar. Deadpool rubbed his head his vision a little blurred, maybe from falling right on his head or just being tossed around like a rag doll. He looked down, seeing an old friend, a boyfriend, if he were to develop feelings for him. “Oh, why did he have to throw you in here?” Spider-Man groaned, laying flat on his back. “SPIDEY!!! Long time, no see? How you doin’ bud?” Deadpool scooped him up in a big bear hug, squeezing him. “Ow! Ow! Ow! ... Deadpool! You’re crushing my lungs!” Spider-Man huffed patting Deadpool’s shoulder. “Oh sorry. Well guess you ended up here too huh?” “Pretty much. Man, all the ponies ever want to do is eat me for some weird reason! I thought we would team up to fight some villains, or, well, even let me pet them..” “Sorry Spidey. This Equestria’s just full of human nommies.” “Ahem, I’m here, you’re here, even they’re here!” He pointed to the jars next to them. “In case you haven’t noticed, we’re not normal.” In the jar next to them was Batman and Superman, both of them looked very unhappy with Deadpool. “Oh hi! You guys look good after getting a bullet through your brains.” Deadpool chuckled at them. “When I get out of here,” Batman growled. “You’re going to get a fate worst than death!” “What’s worst than getting a low score on Rottentomatoes?” Deadpool proceeded to take out and wear a pair of sunglasses, doing the Dap, and had loud music playing that made Spider-Man cover his ears. “Your actions are very irresponsible!” Superman scowled at Deadpool crossing his arms. “Whatever,... WAIT! Why aren’t you busting out of here?” “Something strange happened when Bruce and I entered this odd world. For some odd reason, this place has made me powerless like on planet Krypton so I’m as normal,.. As well you if I can call you normal.” “Oh sick burn bro.” Deadpool turned around to Spider-Man and put a hand over his mouth.“Not! And thanks for telling us your friend’s name is Bruce!” “You don’t know my full-!” “Bruce Wayne! The beloved version of Donald Trump!” More internet comments were thrown at Deadpool saying how Batman isn’t Trump, how Trump sucks, or that he’s a hater… take your pick. “God damn it. Why are you here?” Batman frowned folding his arms. “And to be fair I’m much richer and nice then the orange.” “Lost kid, came to save him and get money, got taken here.” He pointed to Spider-Man. “And escaping with my best friend!” “So it’s a rescue mission?” Superman asked. “Like you care! You let your dad die in a tornado!” “Um... my Dad’s alive,...” Superman raised an eyebrow. “MAN OF STEEL CLIP!!!” A few of the clips made Superman cover his face and hide away. “We don’t talk about that.” Batman face palmed. “Anyways. Peter, we need to escape! And by ‘We’, I mean ‘me’, I gotta get outta here, save that kid, and get back to my house so I can watch more Impractical Jokers.” “Where?!?” Batman screamed making Superman cover his ears. “Other people here bruce.” “Right. Well then, I think it’s time we get outta here.” Deadpool pulled out a pistol pointing it at the top of the jar and fired. The bullet hit the top and started ricocheting across the jar. Spider-Man screamed, holding Deadpool in front of him till the bullet burrowed into Deadpool’s forehead causing a slash of blood to hit the glass wall. “You idiot! These jars are enchanted! I can barely climb on these walls!” Spider-Man shouted, getting Deadpool to stand up. “We need a different plan to escape! And the only way to do so is during… playtime.” “Re-,.... Rig,... Right….” Deadpool tried to stand up as the hole on his head started healing up. His voice was slurred with half of his mouth missing. “We,... Ju,..Ju-Just gotta wait,.. And maybe,.. Pounce on him when,.. He don’t know.” “Just relax till your head’s healed up.” Spider-Man dropped Deadpool letting him fall limp. “We might be here for a while… but it’s good to see someone I know… even if you’re an idiot.” ---- The sound of growls slowly came into Cody’s hearing, as did his sight. Everything was dark, even when his sight came back, though he didn’t know where he was at. All around him was warm wind, not so hot where he’s sweating, but warm enough to not freeze. Followed by the warmth was liquid, most of which he was in, with a few landing on him. However, he felt the floor moving on it’s own, with a rhythm to it… and it felt like flesh. That’s when he got up and looked around, seeing that he was in a stomach with some other kids. “Ooh! Hello there, little one.” The Motherly voice of Luna echoed around him, which was followed by a Glurk. Following that glurk was a child falling into the stomach, who looked around in fear at their new surrounding, which was followed by Luna letting out a burp, making everything shake. “Mmm… enjoy your stay, little one.” “... Oh no!” Cody spoke, standing up and running to the wall, smacking it with his fist. “LET ME OUT!!! LET ME OUT!!!” He panicked. Luna continued her walking, but felt him moving and slamming on her stomach wall. “Well, you’re awake. And don’t worry, you’ll be out soon enough.” “No! Get me out of here! I got to be with my sister! I need her!!!” “And you will in the meantime. For now, rest; I see another lost child.” Cody sighed letting himself flop into the sloppy, slippery wall. He saw no way out, he could feel the walls gurgling, and the swaying around him along with all the other kids. “Is this it?” “Hey, it's ok buddy.” A kid came over sitting next  to Cody. He was a few years younger than him. “Luna’s a great guardian. She’s protected us many times before.” “What?” Cody looked up at other kid. “Luna’s swallowed us and other kids before. She keeps us safe in her belly for many nights before.” Another Glurk, followed by another kid entering the stomach. “I know, it’s a bit scary, even I was afraid when she swallowed me, but I find it to be very protective, comfy even, especially when she burps.” A loud growl shook the walls, which was followed by another loud burp by Luna. “Heh, Nice one, Luna!” The indent of Luna’s hoof was shown right behind them. “Thank you, Charlie. I think that was the best one this week.” “Whoa.” Cody crawled over to lump of impression of Luna’s hoof he pressed his hands into it feeling the softness of the stomach flesh and the hardness of Luna’s hoof under it. “Man this is so,.. Weird,.. But kind of cool.” “Don’t be afraid little one, you’ll be fine, I promise.” Luna spoke, continuing her track, looking to the sky. “The dawn will come soon. You should get some sleep before the sun arrives.” “Thank you Luna.” Cody smiled hugging into the warm stomach wall snuggling into it. “But pray tell, is this your first day here in Equestria? If so, what happened prior to me swallowing you?” “Well I was,.. Well just,..” Cody was not really sure about sharing what was going on at home. Things of embarrassment and disappointment were hovering over his head and the thought of it was making him uncomfortable. “Little one, it's alright, you don’t have to tell me.” Luna’s hoof gently pushed them off of her stomach’s wall. “We can do this tomorrow night if you want.” “Thank you ma’am.” Cody hugged the stomach wall. Luna smiled before flapping her wings, returning to Canterlot’s castle, feeling rather full and needing to turn in for the day. ---- Deadpool played his harmonica, wearing a prisoner’s outfit, with a beard somehow sticking out of his mask. Spider-Man just stood next to him with a curious look in his eyes. “How do you do that?” He asked. “What?” Deadpool replied. “All of that.” “With skillz, my friend. Just like how we’re about to go into Playtime!” “And how would you know th-?” “Oh boy! It’s playtime!” Button Mash’s voice spoke, followed by him galloping into his room. “Ok, who should I have an adventure with who?” “Ooh! How about the 2 of us on an expedition to get the lost treasure of One Eye Willy!” Deadpool suggested. “Really? The Goonies?” Spider-Man whispered. “Oh wow! That sounds amazing!” Button replied, turning to his toy chest and pulling out both an eyepatch and a pirate hat. He cleared his throat before turning to his best pirate voice. “ARGG The treasure be by these seas!” “Arg.” Deadpool replied, wearing his pirate outfit. “What the-!?” Spider-Man yelled before letting out a defeated sigh. “It’s Deadpool, don’t question it, Peter.” Button Mash opened the jar, holding Spider-Man and Deadpool, then turned it upside down and held his hoof under it. “Come on little guys that treasure has to be found!” The two fell onto his hoof, before being held against their will. “Captain!” Deadpool spoke in his best pirate accent. “We must follow yonder map to find the treasure of Willy!” He held up a makeshift map. “Yer right, Poopsmith John!” Spider-Man chuckled a bit. “And ye received a demotion, First Mate Smith! Yer now the poopsmith!” “Dang it.” Spider-Man spoke. Button looked at the map. “Ah! We’re taking about 50 paces ahead! Follow! One! Two Three!” As Button counted, Deadpool whispered to Spider-Man. “Alright, hopefully, Button will walk outside, perhaps have us dig, and when he looks away, we’ll book it!” “And if he doesn’t?” Spider-Man asked. “Then we declare mutiny against the writers!” 0-0 To make sure Deadpool doesn’t throw my friend and I out, Button walked outside with two plastic spoons in his mouth. “Forty-eight, Forty-nine, Fifty!” Button gently dropped the 2 red wearing men to the floor before giving them their ‘shovels’. “This be the place of the treasure! Start digging, and we’ll get the booty!” “Mmm… Booty.” Deadpool moaned to himself, then drooled as he remembered Big Mac’s titanic cheeks. Spider-Man just rolled his eyes before digging away. Deadpool kept thinking of butts while Spider-Man kept digging, not even helping Spider-Man dig. While he was still in a butt thinking faze, Spider-Man stood up and slapped Deadpool in the back of the head, making him jump. “Ahhh! Assassin!” Deadpool suddenly hit Spider-Man in the back of the head with his shovel. Thankfully, it was a plastic shovel. “Yeah, the movies look overhead that real shovels can kill people with a simple whack to the head.” Spider-Man slapped Deadpool again and it wasn’t hard to tell he was getting mad at Deadpool. “I’m not gonna dig a hole for nothing! ... Now help me.” “Alright, fine!” Deadpool began to dig away, until the jingle that makes everyone jump was heard, with the voice of a stallion saying a quote that kids (and some adults) freak out about. “Ice cream! Get your ice cream!” “ICE CREAM!!!” Button and Deadpool yelled in Unison. Button ran ahead, and was followed by Deadpool, who was yanked back by Spider-Man. “Come on! Now’s our chance!” Spider-Man yelled, firing a rope of web to a nearby building. “But,.. But,.. Ice cream.” Deadpool cried as he was being dragged by his feet. Spider-Man leaped into the air shooting a web shot up to a roof shingle and swung up while dragging Deadpool along. “No time! Let’s find your kid and get out of here!” They both landed on a rooftop, hiding behind a chimney. “Alright, where’s your kid? We need to get out of here quickly! Who knows how Aunt May’s feeling without me… or Mary Jane for that matter.” “Oh, alright.” Deadpool pulled himself from Spider-Man’s grip. He brought a finger to his chin, thinking and looked around the town seeing all the ponies walking around and doing their daily routine. “Hmm, I lost the kid somewhere in an alleyway, but I just don’t know where he could be now. I mean anyone could have picked him up.” “Great.” Spider-Man scanned around for the kid, not spotting anyone, or any human on the ground. He growled looking around still not spotting any human. There was a feeling of gust of wind. Spider-Man didn’t pay much attention to it, but was suddenly yanked back. “WAAHH!” Deadpool grabbed a hold of Spider-Man’s costume, seeing a gigantic figure fly above them. Both Spider-Man and Deadpool looked up seeing the giant form of Rainbow Dash hovering over them she landed with a loud thud on the shingles. “NOT YOU!!!” The men shouted in unison. “Thought you guys could get away huh? Think again.” Rainbow Dash gave a smirk and licked her lips. She slowly walked closer and closer to them, making both men step back with every step she made towards them. “You two are together, good this makes it easier for me.” “... If you have any poo, fling it now.”Deadpool suggested. “... Ew!” Spider-Man replied. “Besides, I have a better idea.” He stepped towards the rainbow Mare. “Oi! You want to eat me!? I’m right here!” “With pleasure!” Rainbow thrusted herself to Peter Parker with an open mouth. Peter smiled under his mask and threw something into her mouth. “Web grenade!” Rainbow stopped as she felt something small land in her mouth. “... What did you just-” Her mouth exploded with web in her mouth, effectively making her mouth sticky and not being able to move well. “Run!!!” Spider-Man turned and ran past Deadpool. The Merc followed, not wanting to get caught by Rainbow again, but stopped before jumping off the building. “Sorry, Dashie, but I got a kid to save and a huge paycheck to earn!” He jumped off the building, instantly regretting missing the web line next to him. “AHHH!!! POOP!!! MAKE ME LIGHTER!!!” He crashed onto the floor. “... You’ve betrayed me, Patrick Stewart.” “Get up!” Spider-Man spoke, picking Deadpool and having the two hide under a bush. “Alright, we’re gonna need to retrace your steps to find this kid. Do you have any idea where he’s at?” “Hmm,... Well not really.” Deadpool looked around he lifted up his mask and stuck his finger in his mouth and then taking it out feeling the air. “Maybe this way!” Deadpool went running down an alleyway with Spider-Man, followed by some webshooting. Deadpool ran to a bush, seeing some hoof prints in the ground. He flopped down into them, inspecting the walls of the hoofprint, and using himself as a ruler. “Hmm. Now I’m no expert but,... I’d say Sun Butt came and took him away.” Deadpool raised his hand up with a point. “Princess Celestia?” Spider-Man asked. “Yes, but… hold on just a minute!” Deadpool pulled out his smartphone and-Hey! You’re not supposed to do that! “Bite me. … Oh my…” “What!?” “...Eh, not to alarm you or anything, but it seems my kid has been… eaten.” “EATEN!?!?!? So we’re trapped here forever!? Trapped in a world filled with gigantic, man eating versions of our favorite TV characters!?” “Hey, I said Eaten, not digested. He’s with Princess Luna, actually, and-” “Wait, Princess Luna ate him?” “Yep. And the kid’s with her, inside her belly with other kids, heading to-.” Deadpool kept looking at the smart phone. “She eats kids!? WHY!?!?!?” “Uh, to keep them safe inside her belly from other predators, to keep herself full, and I guess it’s because she doesn’t want the extra thicc plot of Celestia… mmm… Celestia’s butt.” Deadpool giggled thinking of the thick plot of Celestia. He could only imagine how big it would be now, that he was tiny. “Deadpool, you're creeping me out. Quit it.” Spider-Man frowned ready to slap Deadpool again. “Hey, you too found at least one of the ponies attractive. But enough of my fantasies, we gotta head to Canterlot and retrieve the kid before some other jackass can get to him.” “And who’s that?” --- Deathstroke growled as he was sitting on a table with a small plate of peas and mashed potatoes next to him. “Come now,” Cheerilee cooed. “You have to eat to be strong.” “... I hate this world.” He growled to himself. --- “... No one in particular!” Deadpool spoke, pointing to the castle. “To the Castle we go! Just the two of us! Like old times!!!” “... Oh no.” Spider-Man whimpered as Deadpool pulled out a boombox and played a song for the two to travel to. To Be Continued. > Chapter 5. Share the experience > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cody ran from his house, tearing up at another case of his sister defending him from an attack from their mom. He couldn’t handle it anymore, he just had to run away. Where to be exact? He didn’t know, but anywhere seemed better than here. It started like any other night Cody was in his room on his old laptop, with posters of movies and comic book covers taped to his walls, though it was mostly to cover the holes and cracks in the walls. The broken large TV laid untouched, gathering dust, on top of the flat screen, showing the normal News report on the various Superheroes saving the day. Cody laid on his bed, watching said News with a board look on his face and a hint of worry. Sudden bumps made his head jolt up only seeing his sister walking by, but stopped going to the doorway. “How you doin’, bud?” Sarah asked. She looked a little concerned. “I’m fine.” Cody faked a smile. “You your birthday’s coming up. You wanna do anything?” “I-I don’t really know what we can do, besides I don’t really need anything.” Cody tried not to sound disappointed. “You sure? I may not have a lot, but your big sis’s been saving for your special day.” “N-No Sarah it’s ok.” Cody rubbed the back of his head, smiling shyly. “Come on bud. It’s your birthday you’re gonna be teenager soon.” Sarah walked sitting next to him putting her arm around his shoulder. “You deserve something bud. Besides, I think you’re gonna like this.” She pulled out a flip phone before dialing a number. “NEW PHONE, WHO DIS!?” The familiar voice of Deadpool spoke. “Hey, it’s my brother’s birthday soon. What’s your pay?” “Uh… $40 an hour. $80 if there’s cops around.” Some odd music started playing in the background. “And,... I could talk to you for extra if you want?” “It’s not that kind of birthday.” Sarah rolled her eyes. “It’s for my brother.” “Oh! Crap… uh… yeah, sorry about that… yeah, I can do that. Date and time? I’ve got some stuff to do beforehand.” There was sound of some men shouting and gunfire. “In a week. Probably around 12.” Sarah smiled. “And thanks for doing this.” “Ah, not a problem,.. OH HANG ON!” Deadpool’s voice became muffled and two shots were fired and man’s voice shouted ‘My LEG!’ “Sorry! Just shot a Spongebob Cameo.” The phone hung up. Sarah had a confused look on her face as she just closed the phone. “Well, that was interesting. You know who I called?” “Dad?” “No, even better. Trust me, bud, you’ll love it.” Sarah laughed she wrapped her arm around his head Cody tried to pull out but her headlock was too strong. “Ah come on, let go!” Cody tried to pull out from his sister’s grip only to be given a noogie across his head. “Ah no this is cruel and unusual torment.” “You know you love it.” She chuckled a bit. Both siblings started laughing and began to wrestle Cody tried pull at her arm and throwing her but she just laughed pulled him in for a bear hug. “So, wanna hear how the Avengers stopped the Masters of Evil during my visit to New York Central Park?” “I saw it on the news.” “News isn’t as good as if you were there.” “... Eh, fair enough.” Sarah started talking about how the Hulk and Thor slammed threw a whole army of villains while Captain America and Iron Man battled Ultron and M.O.D.O.K. with an army of brainwashed Skrulls. It was quite as ridiculous as it sounded, but it’s pretty normal when stuff like this happens on a daily basis. “That’s so cool! Man I wish could have been there.” Cody sighed but held his smile as he relaxed on his sister’s shoulder. “Yep it sure was a sight to see.” She pulled out some pictures. “I got some photos, but most of them are blurry.” “I don’t care these are awesome.” Cody went through the photos on the phone. “This is an even better birthday gift.” Cody smiled and hugged his sister wrapping his arms around her. “No problem buddy.” Sarah patted on the back. “And, hey, since I know your computer isn’t running right I got you something,...” Sarah blushed a bit. “Huh?” Cody asked getting up looking at her curiously Sarah was a little red in the face she rubbed her head and reached into her pocket, pulling out some rolled up magazines. “Don’t tell anyone I got you these!” She glared at him almost making him jump back in fear, he sheepishly grabbed the magazines out of her hand and unrolled them the covers showed some young women in tight bras and thongs. Cody blushed bright red trying not to look bashful. “Just make sure you keep them hidden, ok buddy?” Sarah smiled and patted him on the back. “You're a good kid, don’t ever change who you are, okay? Promise that.” “I-I Promise.” Cody smiled and gave his sister another hug. “Good, now, I’ll let you do your business.” The sweet moment was interrupted when the sound of a slamming door made the whole apartment shake. “Damn it.” The sound was of course the 40 year old drunken woman that they both called “Mom”. She came stumbling in, her messy hair hanging over her face. She knocked over a tower of moldy pizza boxes on the table. “Wer,.. the,.. Hell did I get,... such disappointment!” The woman shouted with a slur in her voice. “I get no,... RESPECT IN THIS DAMN HOUSE!” Sarah stood up her fists tightened making a cracking sound. She stomped out of Cody’s room, closing the door behind her. Cody nervously walked to the door, putting his ear against it, which was followed by the sound of loud bumps and thuds that could be heard with the sound of his sister and mom screaming at each other, killing the silence in the apartment. Cody didn’t want to hear it... he’d already heard enough. ‘This is your fault.’ ‘You kids blame me for everything.’ ‘You need to be better parents.’ ‘It's the damn boy’s fault.’ ‘He shouldn’t have been born.’ It was late, but he didn’t know what to do. As much as he didn’t want to, he had to leave his home behind, writing a bit of a hastily written message. Cody snuck out through the fire escape and made his way down the streets on New York. He figured the best place was to start was at the local park, both because it was far, yet close to where he lived, and the lights were pretty bright, letting him use a map to see where he would go and plan it out. Cody walked through the New York Central Park. He walked along the street lights, looking at the moths that flutter around the lightbulbs. A sigh came out aloud as he rubbed his brown hair, making it more shaggy. Cody finally found a place; he felt safe around the playground. He went into the abandoned place, at least, for now, and pulled out a map, trying to figure out where to go.  He sat on the single swing, figuring the best place was Canada; it did seem rather cliche, but with all the stuff happening, the Northern Country did seem the better alternative, and if not, Alaska would also work. Despite it freezing, he actually liked the cold. It made him feel young, almost innocent once again. That was… until he saw a glow coming from him. All he wanted was to get away far away from his mother he didn’t want to hear or anywhere not with his mom, not even in New York just somewhere far somewhere no human could find him. What he thought was just a reflection of something off of him soon escalated as he began to glow all over him, soon engulfing him. “CODY!!!” Sarah yelled, right behind him. “SARA-!!!” In a flash, Cody was gone, disappearing without a trace. Cody felt a rush of cold air blowing past him. It was an icy chill blowing past him making him want the warmth back he started feeling gravity take control of his motion again and felt a sudden flash of light makes him close his eyes covering his face. All around him was darkness, but he felt the floor move up and down in a rhythm, almost as if it was breathing. Cody rubbed his hand across the floor; it was very spongy and humid. He pressed his fingers deeper in it, making a slimy, squishy sound which had goop sticking to his hands. When he moved, the squishy sound repeated itself; he could feel the humid moistness around his small form, which had a pretty rancid smell, though it had a bit of something that smelt similar to mouthwash. Cody sniffed at the air, enjoying the mint smell rather than New York air. He stood there, reaching into his pocket, pulling out his flashlight, clicking it on. The light shined on a shimmery gloss pink wall with it’s light reflecting. He stood up and walked over to it, feeling the smooth surface, then tapped on the wall... or, at least he thought it was a wall. He turned his light to the floor; it was a ruby red slimy member of some kind. His eyes widen and looked down at his shoes, lifting them up and seeing clear goop sticking to the bottom of his shoe. He stumbled around a bit shinning his light above him, seeing the really large sized fleshy gums around the white boulders that were teeth. “... Oh no.” The mouth closed on him, leaving him in darkness. Cody panicked as he felt the tongue moving everywhere, slamming him everywhere. The massive tongue pinned him to the ‘floor’, which lapped at his face. It made him cringe, making Cody grab hold of the slimy floor in tight grip. All he could do was hold on, and attempt to climb out, through, the mouth of the creature he was in slurped at him, making feminine sounding moans; it was a ‘Mmm’ sound that echoed throughout the place. Cody felt the massive member lift into the air, making him cling to it tightly, his fingers sunk into it making a squish sound. Soon it flopped down making a wave of hot saliva splash onto him, soaking him all over, much to his disliking. Cody tried climbing towards what he hopped was the front of the mouth, his saliva soaked hair blocked his vision, he was feeling gravity shift the tongue was flopping up and down suddenly like trashing bull slimy tongue flinged the boy back into the center of the tongue he rolled on the slippery and squishy lumps. Cody whipped the spit from his face he looked to see a gigantic, ruby cavern that dripped with clear saliva. He looked down, seeing the fleshy rings in motion as hot wind blew into his face. He saw what looked like a voice box or the vocal cords exhaling the hot air out. Cody watched as it closed and then a fleshy lump went up, blocking anything from entering it. Cody backed away in fear, seeing a new larger tunnel open up. Suddenly, he felt the gravity shifting again as he was tossed into the molars! Gravity carried him right into the center of the ruff, rock-like surface, which was followed by the top molars slowly falling onto him. “N-NO!!! STOP!!!” He begged, squirming his way out and landing in between the lips and teeth. The mouth opened again, with light momentarily blinding him as the sun began to rise in the far east. Without any hesitation, he climbed out and fell, but fate was not as kind as he thought. The lips suddenly closed sealing him back in the giant or creature whatever it was moving. Cody was being flopped around by the slimy member again and began to fall right towards the throat. He saw his chance with the flappy flesh hanging in the middle, just above the throat. He held out his arms, grasping hold of the squishy organ, gripping it with all he could, looking down into the abyss. “I-I don’t wanna see anymore!” Cody screamed and tried climbing the uvula. He only slipped as the uvula swung and swayed in many directions. The sound of loud coughing boomed and shook throughout the whole mouth, with the head of the giant jerking awake. Cody took this as his chance to get out, swinging onto the tongue and jumping right out, landing on the giant’s soft, snow white, fur covered belly. The sound of screaming came as he was thrown off, landing on the floor roughly. “Rairty!? What’s wrong!?” The voice of a raspy sounding woman asked. “A BUG WAS IN MY MOUTH!!!” The screaming one answered rapidly. “Hey… that’s no bug! That’s a… A TINY!!!” Cody turned round to see a blur of rainbow coming right at him, though the blur had a distinguished mouth to it, ready to eat him! He ducked as a loud “CLACK” could be heard, just missing him. Cody stumbled a bit rubbing the spit out of his eyes getting his vision back he looked up seeing a gigantic room and a bed on it was a frightened gigantic Rarity looking down at him, covered by blankets, and over at the left of him was an equally sized Rainbow Dash, who was picking herself up off the floor rubbing, her head. “R-Rarity? And Rainbow Dash!?” Cody’s mouth dropped looking in pure amazement. “Yeah, now stay still, snack!” Rainbow lunged herself at Cody with a hungry look in her eyes. Cody jumped out of the way, though Rainbow slid on the floor and steered herself back on track. “W-wait! We can talk this out!” “Yeah, when you’re inside my belly!” Rainbow licked her lips and ran to him with an open, drooling maw. “Rainbow,... Don’t frighten the poor boy.” Rarity interrupted getting out of her bed. It was too late. Rainbow pinned Cody under one of her hooves. “Awe, don’t sweat it, Rare. He’s going to enjoy a 5 star stay inside my belly complete with daily exercises, and a couple of new guests.” She licked her lips again. “Down you go!” She opened her maw and lowered Cody in. “N-NO!!! WAIT!!! STOP!!!” Cody pleaded. “Wait a second.” Rarity spoke, using her magic to hold Cody in. “And what were you doing here so quickly, Rainbow Dash?” “...Uh… I was… napping.” Rainbow replied with a fake smile. “Napping next to my house when it was nighttime, and on a Tuesday, A.K.A., a day where I measure Tinies and make clothes for them?” “Uh… yes?” She was met with a rolled up magazine whack to the head. “How dare you try to eat my customers, Rainbow Dash!!! I’ve been wondering why my best customers have been missing on days like these! Go on, out of my face!” “... But I-” “I SAID GET OUT!!!” Rainbow jumped in the air and flew out. Rarity turned her attention to Cody. “Aww, I’m so sorry for that, but you should know better than to enter a lady’s mouth when they’re sleeping, young man. If you wanted me to eat you, you could’ve just asked.” “I-It was a mistake, I swear. I just found myself in there.” Cody sounded frightened looking up at the towering white mare. “I don’t even know how I got here.” “Aww, you must be new. Don’t worry, it’s normal, but… wait… how did you know my name?” “We-Well I,... Um you see.” Cody spoke shyly. Suddenly the sound of windows being opened. Rainbow Dash came flying in right for Rarity with an open maw, yelling. “Mine! Mine! Mine!” “RAINBOW STOP!” Rarity held Cody close to her furry neck and leaped away from Rainbow Dash. Her hoof made the mistake of landing on the spare fabric on the floor, tripping the unicorn onto her side, releasing Cody and letting him fly out of her grip, right outside the window. He screamed as he fell, before being caught. In one way, he was happy, but in the other, when he saw his savior, he screamed again as it was Rainbow Dash that had him in her mouth. “It’s snack time!” Rainbow fling him around and tossed him in the air a prideful smirk across her muzzle as she watched Cody falling towards her again. She opened her mouth showing the cavernous throat waiting for him. “Please,... Rainbow don’t!” Cody yelled tears seeped from his eyes as he got closer and closer. Very fortunate, Rainbow’s aim was off and he bounced off her bottom lip, falling to the floor. He got up and ran for his life. “Hey! Come back here!!!” “Why are you doing this!?”                                                ___ Cody woke up from his dream, which was a weird flashback to what just happened. He found himself out of Luna’s stomach, but resting on her tummy. Luna herself was fast asleep, snoring lightly, but just sitting on her side gave Cody the idea of how big Luna was compared to him. It was a bit intimidating, to say the least, but she wasn’t exactly the type to scare the living daylights out of him or any of the kids around. If he wanted to, he could just lay down on her side and take another nap, though, he didn’t want to have another flashback dream. He patted her side. “Uh… sleep tight, Luna.” Cody slipped out of the room undetected. He ran down the hallway, but stopped in his track when he saw a Royal Guard walking down the hall. It didn’t see him, which was good, but also bad, since the Guard came, stomping his hooves, coming his way. Cody backed up as the hooves came stomping on the clear floor, making a loud boom & clack sound. Cody ran for his life as the hooves slammed up and down each getting closer to him by the second he saw a cracked open door, he ran right for it, just missing the slamming hoof that would have made him paste. Cody walked in the room, catching his breath, and saw that the room he was in was not only huge, but open, with stain glassed windows depicting various feats, an open fireplace with a lit fire, and books decorating the shelves that look ancient. Cody admired the room but he also admired the open windows letting in a nice cool breeze. He smiled, seeing a way out as he saw the closest open window was next to a tall chair, looking almost throne like. He ran for it, not knowing what other giants may be wondering around. He had an idea where he was, but he had a suspicion that he was in Canterlot, but if they were like what he expected, he’d end up in the gut of a guard and stay there for about a week. He stopped at the leg of the chair; it had to be the size of skyscraper but if it meant for him to escape, then he would take it. With his strength, he began to scale the chair. He climbed and climbed, not even getting closer to the arm, but he was determined. He scaled and climbed up to the seat, preparing to make his way to the arm rest, but stopped as he heard the door open. Though he was frozen, he watched as her majesty herself had entered the room; Princess Celestia, in the flesh. Cody climbed into the seat his feet sinking in the plush cushion hoping to not be seen by her grace. Celestia seemed to be too busy having a slice of chocolate-banana cream she had floating in her magical aura, but hovering above the slice was the whole cake. Cody watched as Celestia gracefully, even with a bite of cake in her mouth she still had her composure, but watched in fear as Celestia turned around, showing her gigantic flanks to him. She didn’t see him as she just hopped onto her chair, crushing Cody underneath her gigantic exposed rear. Were this to be realistic, Cody would’ve been nothing more but a meer red stain on Celestia’s otherwise clean fur, but Cody was, while crushed, not broken physically. Truth be told, Celestia’s flank felt like he was under a ton of bread or marshmallows, very soft to the touch, though he was still able to breath underneath all her booty fat. Suddenly, the cheeks started shifting, making Cody move across the chair until he was pealed off the left flank cheek. He was stuck too, and thankfully, he was given some space but was meet with the titantic cheeks once again. As he was scooped in between them, the cheeks smothered across Cody’s tiny form, and he was now stuck between the two plump white boulders. Cody tried to move, only to start slipping further down in the crack. The cheeks pressed into him, squeezing his body between each cheek, keeping his movements stiff. “Hm… this chair feels strange today.” Celestia spoke, moving her flanks a bit. “Is there a Tiny down there? Please, feel free to move, if you can, that is.” Cody hardly could hear her voice he tried to move but couldn’t; the cheeks kept him in his soft prison. He pressed his hands into the soft flank cheek, trying to push it loose, only to have it sink in the fur. It was soft like pillow and warm to the touch. Cody only made a tiny impression that he couldn’t fight back any longer and let the cheeks press back into him, he managed to sigh, despite his face being squeezed by two of the largest flank cheeks in all of Equestria, and the world. “Um,.. Your highness,.. P-Princess Celestia, Ma’am... I can’t.”  Cody hoped she could hear him, even if his voice was being muffled by the fluffy titans. “Oh! Someone’s in between my flanks again?” Cody felt an aura around him, then was pulled out. He was surrounded by Celestia’s golden aura, letting him breath once again in the air, but judging by the voice of Celestia, this wasn’t her first time she sat on someone and they got stuck in between her flanks. The boy was brought to Celestia’s face, who examined him. “...Uh… hi?” “Hello there, my little topper.” “Pl-Please your highness! I-it was a mistake.” Cody shivered hopping she wasn’t angry. “Oh, I know, but no one’s around to be my cake topper, so consider yourself lucky.” “Please, I was already eaten.” Cody gulped. “I-I don’t wanna be swallowed up again.” “Don’t worry, it’s going to be fun.” She dropped him on top of the slice before getting a fork, taking a piece of the cake, inches from him, before eating said piece. “Mmm… so good… hope you can improve it, Cody.” Before Cody could get up, the fork blocked his path as the piece was taken off and he was made into her mouth. “W-WAIT!!! STOP!!!” Celestia closed her mouth on him and tossed him around, chewing her cake while making sure he wasn’t on her teeth. “Mmm. A different kind of taste... you're new, aren't you?” “Uhh… yes?” Cody found himself stuck in a mush that was the cake he was on, having him stuck in it. “Don’t worry, we can talk for a while.” She flicked her head back and swallowed everything down. Cody let out a squeak as he fell into her throat, then was pushed down into her stomach. After a few moments, he free fell and landed in another fleshy prison, this one, however, the stomach acids glowed golden, making the place lit up, and several slices of cake slowly melted away. She let out a small burp. “Can you let me out?” Cody climbed onto the slimy wall. “Hmm… maybe.” “Please I’m scared.” Cody begged feeling a bit of tears forming as he clinged to the stomach wall. “... Oh, alright. I just want your flavor.” She idly sipped her tea, making a small stream land into her stomach. The tea made the acids bubble, with some bubbles coming up and popping. “You might want to hitch onto one of the bubbles.” “O-Ok.” Cody saw one of the bubbles form and leaped into it, going right into it the bubble, which didn’t pop, but held him inside. “Whoa!” Before he could say anything, the bubble went into the esophagus, where it popped, propelling Cody out. Celestia let out a loud, but small burp, quickly catching Cody in her magic. She giggled a bit, taking a napkin and dried him off. “Excuse me, it’s not very lady-like to be burping like that.” “I thought it was a pretty good burp.” Cody shyly smiled, looking up at her still, a little fearful of her. “Oh please, a good burp is one that can fire you around Equestria. That was a weak burp, if you ask me.” “... Really?” “Oh yes. Care to tell me a little about yourself?” “... Well, I came from New York, and my life was…” --- Spider-Man gathered a bunch of sticks around, setting the campfire for him and Deadpool. Deadpool sharpened one of his swords, making a small spark that lit up the sticks into small flames. “I have to say, it’s quite great to see you again, Petey,” Deadpool began. “I saw you in the new episode! You were chased by Rainbow Dash.” “Please, don’t remind me of that.” Spider-Man replied, resting his head in his left hand. “I was this close to being digested.” “Digested? Pfft! Nah! You just missed your chance at the best sauna you could feel, one that provides free meals and drinks… if you’re fine with said food and drinks to be covered in saliva and stomach acids, that is.” “... Yeah, I’m gonna skip out on that offer.” The floor shook as a pair of footsteps could be heard. “Oh crap!” “Assassin!” Deadpool leaped up pulling out his swords and got in fighting pose. The footsteps grew loud and boomed. Spider-Man slowly started to walk behind Deadpool as the booming stomps grew near and near to the two. “Think you can slice whatever is out there?” “Depends. Have anymore web grenades?” “Those were my last batch!” The bush was toppled over and a pair of familiar yellow hooves connecting to red fur was seen under the campfire. “Huh? You again!?” The Booming Western voice of Big Mac spoke as the stallion lowered his head to the two. “HUSBANDO!!!” Deadpool dropped his swords and went running for Big Mac’s muzzle, hugging it tightly. “Your muzzle feels so soft and warm.” Big Mac had a surprised look on his face before going serious and huffing Deadpool off. “Now what in tarnation are ya’ll both doing near the edge of the Everfree forest? It’s late out here.” “Well, why are you out here and not at the Apple Farm?” “... Well…” His mouth opened as Claire opened with her hands. “Is this where we’re camping, papa?” she asked rather nonchalantly. “HOLY CRAP!!! BIG MAC’S EATING A KID!!!” Spider-Man shrieked. He fired a stream of web at the stallion’s muzzle before pulling himself into Big Mac’s mouth, tossing Claire into a spider-hammock he made before holding Big Mac’s mouth with his own body. “WADE!!! GET IN THERE!!! GET ANY OTHER KIDS OUT OF THERE!!!” “Think you should explain sweetie.” Deadpool rubbed his head and sat back on a mushroom. Claire leaped out of Spider-Man’s hammock and ran over to Big Mac’s muzzle. ‘“Uh, Sir? I’m the only kid.” “Really? Good.” Spider-Man jumped out before firing another web at Big Mac, landing right in between his eyes. “You have this coming, big guy!” Spider-Man began to punch at Big Mac’s left eye. The stallion just shut the eye, feeling Peter’s attempted punches, feeling more like pebbles than punches, annoying the stallion just a bit. “Sir, Can ya kindly stop fer a second?” Big Mac asked, sounding a bit annoyed as he looked. “You would like that, wouldn’t you!? So you can eat more people and digest them inside your stomach! I’m not letting that happen! Not over my-” “I’ve been inside Papa’s belly, mister.” Claire interrupted. This made Peter stop with a confused look. “... What?” “Papa’s belly isn’t dangerous like what you think. It’s a bit gross, sure, but it’s safe as a safe. Mr. Deadpool can agree.” “WHAT!?!?!?” “What can I say?” Deadpool replied. “It’s the best place for tea parties, and sleeping… especially in between his assets.” Deadpool drooled under his mask. “If ya please, Mr. Spider thing, can ya get off me?” Big Mac snorted making Peter quickly leap off and backing away from the giant stallion. “Oh, I-I’m sorry, Mr. Big Mac, sir.” Peter replied. “I-I just thought that… well… are you making this up, Wade?” Deadpool pulled out his cellphone. “Does this answer your question?” It was the tea party he and Claire had, complete with ye olden fancy music playing with the gurgling & snores of Big Mac, albeit, muffled. “... O...kay… I’m just gonna-” “SNACKTIME!!!” Deadpool grabbed Spider-Man and threw him into Big Mac’s mouth. Big Mac’s head reeled back, confused, but he swallowed Spider-Man before letting out a loud belch. He shivered a bit. “Ugh… I can feel him climbing in there.” Big Mac spoke, poking his belly. “Just keep calm in there, pardner. Yer safe… Claire?” “Right.” Big Mac lowered his head and extended his tongue out like a carpet, letting Claire to simply walk in. He swallowed her gently, letting out another belch, but it was more quiet sounding. “There, see, yer safe? Now, for you-” Deadpool opened Big Mac’s mouth. “LEMME IN, LEMME IN, LEMME IN!!!” Deadpool shoved himself in Big Mac’s mouth, snuggling with the stallion’s tongue. “Heya, licky, missed me?” He took his mask off before giving it a kiss. Big Mac felt what he was doing, blushing at the strange actions Deadpool was doing, unsure what to do. “You like it when I do this, don’t you?” He motorboated the muscle, just making Big Mac freeze with a confused look. “You know, I could strip down and hump you if you want.” PTOO! Big Mac spat Deadpool out, quickly finding out why Deadpool wore the mask in the first place. The Merc turned around, showing his butt ugly face that would be mistaken for a Ghoul in the Fallout series. “Hey! That’s not a nice description of my mug! And what the hell, Big Mac? Don’t you want me to give your tongue some lovin’?” “... Eenope!” “What!? Why!? It was my way to spread love to you!” “I ain’t into that.” “I can be a woman if you want. I can feel my tenders going away!” “... Still nope.” “Oh come on… I’ll call you ‘Daddy’.” “Nope.” “What if I’m only in my underwear?” Big Mac raised his hoof and slammed it down onto Deadpool. “Nope.” “... Ow… can I at least join my friend?” “... Eeyup.” “SWEET!!!” “No ‘love’ though.” “Fine.” Big Mac lowered his head down to Deadpool. The Merc walked in, picking his mask off that was in between his back left molars, and jumped into the stallion’s throat. GLURK! UUURRRPPP!!! Deadpool landed in the stomach, seeing Peter freaking out, holding the ‘ceiling’ above him, hyperventilating. Claire looked unamused at how a superhero could be freaking out. “Sheesh, he’s still freaking out?” Deadpool asked. “Eeyup.” Claire replied. “You can let go, you know.” “NEVER!!!” Spider-Man yelled. “I don’t want to be digested!!!” “... Tea Party?” Deadpool asked. “Tea Party.” Claire replied. The two sat at a table, back in their elegant dresses, sipping tea and enjoying their crumpets. “What the-!?” Spider-Man yelled. “If you let it go, you can join us.” Deadpool spoke. “Isn’t that right, Elsa?” He gestured to a bootleg copy of Disney’s Elsa that clearly had a man’s voice saying ‘Give me your soul’. “Why does she want out feet?” Claire asked. “I don’t know. Guess she’s like Quentin Tarantino.” To Be Continued. > Chapter 6. The Big Crossover... Again > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The sun began to rise in Equestria, hitting the eyes of the apple stallion. In his belly, Claire, with her bunny plushie, Deadpool, sucking on his thumb, and Spiderman, still sticking on the stomach walls, all began to slowly wake up. “... Oh…. Wow it feels like we’ve been asleep for almost a year.” Deadpool yawned rubbing his eyes threw his mask. Deadpool stood up cracking his back, arms, legs and snapped his head left and right. “Man got to get out those month long aches.” You done? “Are you gonna take forever again? You're almost as bad as MrAquino with Flutter-Topia.” No… I’ll try to um get things done. “You sound unsure of yourself… That’s never a good sign.” Deadpool tapped his chin rubbing as he began to think up something. “Hmm. Well I know someone who can be hear by popular demand.” “Ugh… Who are you talking too?” Big Macintosh’s voice rumbled echoing around the stomach walls as a small quake rumbled all the tiny humans inside his belly. Spider-Man yelled awake while Claire calmly yawned rubbing her eyes. “Do you have someone else in there?” “who's there!?” Peter asked. “Is that God!?” “Nope! Peter New!” Deadpool answered. “Oh… your friend's in there.” Big Mac spoke. “And Claire, I presume?” “Right here, papa.” Claire answered, patting the stomach floor. A fleshy wall formed into a bump wear Claire was nudging into her, she giggled hugging the lump of the stomach wall. Outside, Big Mac was nuzzling the side of his belly where Claire was. “Glad to hear ya’ll are alright, even if that other fellow feels weird with his… climbing.” “Hey! It’s not like I wanted to be eaten!” Peter replied, sticking to the walls as Big Mac adjusted himself to a more upright position. He rubbed his belly and felt his belly beginning to gurgle, with a loud burp Deadpool, Spider-Man and Claire were sent flying out into Big Mac’s hoof. “Again! Again! Again!” Deadpool yelled with his hands whaling around. “No….” Spider-Man mumbled having landed face first into Big Mac’s hoof pad, covered in saliva and other juices. “I thought he would smell, but it’s worse on the inside.” “Sorry about that.” Big Mac replied, getting a rag and drying off the spider themed hero. “Though I don’t really get why you’re in costume. It’s not Nightmare Night.” “Um… It's complicated.” Spiderman rubbed the back of his head. “It has something to do with his Uncle Ben’s Instant Brown rice.” Deadpool was then given a punch in the arm by Spider-Man that instantly snapped his arm. “You can take off your mask, we’re in a different world; nobody is gonna see us.” Deadpool took off his mask showing his ugly, messed up mug. Claire jumped back putting her hands up to her mouth in shock, Big Macintosh cringed looking down at the tiny anti-hero. “And you need to put it back on.” Peter replied, putting Deadpool’s mask back on. “So ya’ll are ugly?” Big Mac asked. Claire backed away from the heroes shivering a bit. “No, its ok look.” Spiderman lifted up his mask showing his face to Claire and Big Mac. “And don’t worry DP here may be ugly but he’s still an…. Okay guy.” “Aww I love you too Spidy.” Deadpool ran up to Peter hugging him, Peter sighed trying to push Deadpool away. “Now then how about some breakfast.” Big Macintosh said with a small smile. “Yay! Yay! Yay!” Both Claire and Deadpool cheered, both Peter and Big Macintosh rolling their eyes at Deadpool. As the red stallion made his way downstairs and into the kitchen when a sound made the stallion as well as the three Tinies in his hoof take notice. The sound of an ice cream truck. “ICE CREAM!” Deadpool screamed jumping off Big Mac’s hoof and running out the doggy door leaving behind a trail of smoke. “Ugh… Damn it Wade…” Peter face palmed himself. ---- Somewhere far far away from Ponyville in Canterlot Castle two other superheroes looked through some binoculars, seeing the guards on patrol. Of course, these two were Wonder Woman and The Flash. “Think you can run me in there without us getting spotted?” Wonder Woman asked. “Eh, silence isn’t really my forte.” The Flash replied. “You saw what happened when I raced Supes around the world… wonder where’s the big guy now?” “I have no idea, last I heard was that Batman and Superman were having some disagreements again and that was the last anyone saw of them.” Wonder Woman sighed, clenching her fists. “They might be here, and for all we know they could be held captive in there.” “It’s worth a shot, Diana You ready to make these big ponies feel small?” “I’ve dealt with bigger.” She readied her lasso of truth, extended her right arm in the air, and flew right in… by smashing through a wall. “What a woman!” The Flash tapped into the Speed Force, somehow still working in this new world, and ran past Diana and the gigantic horse guards in there. “What was that!?” One of them asked. “More importantly, who’s she!?” Another asked, pointing at the lone, 3 inch tall Amazon. Wonder Woman approached to them, readying her lasso of Truth. “I am Diana of Themyscira, daughter of Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons. In the name of all that is good, you will release these innocent children, or your reign will end.” Both looked confused. “Uh… is she delusional or…?” The first guard asked. “Eh, she might make a nice snack.” The other replied, walking to her. Wonder Woman walked to her, picking up her speed, and charge, taking her shield out, and bashed the guard! The guard was tossed into the wall of the hallway, missing the other, crashing through the wall. The other guard turned to her, who cracked her lasso, which glowed with a golden aura. Fear took over the guard. “Back up! We need back up!” “When will they ever learn?” She asked herself as the sounds of hooves were heard coming to her. As the guards ran to Wonder Woman, The Flash ran into Luna’s chambers, seeing the kids around. “Oh boy, that’s a lot of kids.” He spoke to himself. “T-The flash!?” One of them asked in pure surprise. “He’s here! The Flash is here!” “Who’s the flash?” Another asked. “Who’s the flash!?” Barry asked. “Hello!? Fastest man alive here! Protector of Keystone city! All that good stuff.” “... I think Luna wanted to surprise us.” Another spoke. “Luna?” The kids pointed to the princess of the night, who slept with some snores. ‘Oh my god! She’s… she’s hot!... Oh no, Barry, do not get distracted! She’s probably like Enchantress. Mind controlling these kids. If only Dr. Fate was here to get these kids out of their brainwashed selves.’ “Uh… I mean, yes, Luna brought me as a surprise guest for… a field trip! Yep, A field Trip!” “To where, Mr. Flash?” One of the kids asked. “A surprise field trip! You’ll have to see it for yourself. Single line please, and hang on… and maybe close your eyes if you have a weak stomach.” “YAY!!!” The kids cheered, getting into a single line. ‘Well, that was easy.’ Barry thought to himself, grabbing a kid and running out, passing by Wonder Woman (who used her lasso to grab a guard and use them as a huge medieval flail), dropping them off at their base, and returning, all in less than a second. “Next, please!” This continued for a minute or two, with nearly every kid in Luna's room taken away. “What is going on here!?!” A loud and powerful voice echoed the halls Princess Celestia slowly marched her way down the hall catching a Guard running and screaming. “What's wrong?” “Powerful Tiny!” The guard gasped for breath. “Really… strong!” “A strong tiny? Oh, my dear subject, humans are much stronger than they appear, but one can't-” She stopped as she saw the hallways were both badly damaged, and all the guards were on the floor, groaning in pain. Celestia entered the hallway and walked towards a pile, with the lone Amazon on top, victorious, unharmed, and barely sweating. “... Did you do all of this?” Celestia only asked, baffled at such a sight. Inside the celestial sun ruler’s mane, Cody peaked out. He had been tucked in there while Celestia relaxed. He climbed up looking over Celestia’s crown at the woman standing on the pile of giants. Diana happen to notice the boy peeking over the crown of the gigantic horse jumping into action she leaped off the pile and raced towards Celestia, scaling up Celestia’s leg, grabbing into the jewelry on her neck and flipped up into the air, Diana hovered above the surprised Celestia. She shifted downward point her legs into a kick pose kicking Celestia in the side of the face knocking her head back causing the boy to fly out from her crown. “No! Child!” Celestia shrieked as Cody flinged threw the air. Diana saw him fall and leaped out grabbing ahold and landed on the clear glass floor with a thud. “Lets go!” Diana held Cody in her arms and ran for the exit, while Celestia collapsed to the floor. She watched Daina running with Cody in her arms. “No! Give him back… You brute!” Celestia stood up her teeth tightened. The Flash appeared on her nose with the last kid in his arms. “Smell ya later, Queen Meanie Pants!” He taunted before running away. “... Luna!” Celestia screamed, running to her sister's room. She gasped upon opening the door, seeing how empty Luna’s room was. “Wake up! Sister, wake up!” Luna groaned, waking up. “... This better be an emergency or-” She spoke, but was wide wake when Celestia shook her. “They took them all!” “... Who took who?” Luna looked around. “Wait… the children!? What happened!? Where are they!? … Who took them?” ---- “Wait! Celestia! Let me go!” Cody screamed, trying to pry himself free of Wonder Woman’s grasp as she and the Flash arrived to their base of operations. “Sheesh, this must be some REAL strong magic.” Barry spoke. “And I don't mean the abracadabra type that Zatanna does.” “No you don’t understand! Take me back there now!” Cody demanded. “We just risked our lives to get you and all the other children out. There's no way we're going back.” “Please take us back.” Diana knelt towards him. “Child, you're not yourself. You miss your family and him, something I can understand, but you and everyone else here are young, easily influenced and brainwashed by their sorcery. We will get you back home, but for now, you must repel their influence. Think about home. Think about your loved ones.” “Trust me lady, last place I want to be is home, and please try to believe me were not brainwashed I swear were not.” Cody begged. “So much for being a mother figure to them.” The flash spoke. “And what would you do to make this better?” Diana replied with some venom in her tone. “Me? Well… hey kids! Try to count how many armpit farts I can make!” He place his right hand under his left armpit and made many fart sounds in a few seconds. Diana groaned. “Why do I even ask?” “Umm… Ms. Diana, you gotta believe me… We were all safe there. The two Sisters were watching over us they didn’t keep us as slaves. They protected us and took care of us.” “Until there's more solid evidence, you will be safe here, with me.” “Just you?” Flash asked. “Yes. We have a lot of mouths to feed, and I only know one man that is fast enough to get groceries and scout ahead.” “Dang it.” ---- “ICE CREAAAAAAM!!!!!!!” Deadpool screamed stopping in the middle of Ponyville scanning for any giant Ice cream truck that would be in Ponyville. The music began to ring through the air again, Deadpool’s eyes lit up but turned in surprise to see a normal sized ice cream truck driving through Ponyville. “Hmm odd but I don’t care I WANT ICE CREAM!” Deadpool went racing for the truck, a big grin could be seen threw his mask. “Well hello there…. Um little boy?” A jerky voice could heard inside the truck sounding confused. “So what would you like?” “Gimme a chocolate and vanilla twist with sprinkles and hot fudge!” Deadpool giggled happily like a little girl waiting for his ice cream. The said ice cream approached Deadpool by a long skinny arm in a purple suit. Deadpool lifted his mask and began to devour the cone inside the truck a hardy chuckle could be heard. “Mmm. Good though I felt something a little solid in that ice cream.” Deadpool itched his chin he heard a beeping sound and noticed a bright red light blinking under his suit suddenly an explosion of fire and splattering blood slapping onto the sides of the truck. “Goes right thru me everytime.” Deadpool said his top half and legs had been blown apart Deadpool looked over seeing his internal organs and blood spilling out. “Hahahahaha! That was certainly a tasty treat don’t you think?” The truck doors opened and out came a skinny man with green hair, white skin and purple suit. “The Joker! Wow this really is becoming an original FanFic.” Deadpool gave a chuckle as Joker stood over him. “Well now it seems you’re quite the gullible one, well if don’t mind I’m off to go blow up some of those large equines.” Joker laughed stepping into the truck setting up the explosives inside and let the truck go on drive. Deadpool watched as the truck drifted away and the Joker jumping out and ran away laughing. “Eh all well nobody and nopony is around.” Deadpool shrugged. “Oh there’s my ice cream truck.” A young British sounding voice called out, Pipsqueak came running over to the truck picking it up and shaking it playfully. “Wait Pip... NO!” Deadpool tried to move using only his arms and hands he tried to wave down the colt to get his attention. “Vroom! Vroom! Vroom!” Pipsqueak giggled moving the truck back and forth and pushed the truck it raced down a foot away from the colt when suddenly the truck was engulfed in a wave of flames. Pipsqueak stood there looking down at the truck his shocked eyes and his mouth agaped, tears began to form in his eyes. “Um… Okay… Um… MUM!” Pipsqueak screamed running for home. “Oh thank God.” Deadpool sighed. “... Oh! Gotta stop him!”  Deadpool crawled over to his legs reaching his top half to his legs and stood up only to see his butt was in the place his crotch should be. “Son of a bitch… Man my ass looks good in the spandex.” Deadpool spotted Joker running and skipping throwing bombs everywhere. “You get a bomb! And you get a bomb! And you get a bomb!” Joker laughed throwing the bombs everywhere, with, in the distant, Michael Bay recording the action. “Come on, bigger explosions! BIGGER!!!” He shouted. The Joker took notice of this and through a bomb at Michael making the director cheer. “Come on! I said-” An explosion came... followed by another explosion that formed the American Flag. “Even in death, he's a sellout.” Deadpool went running for Joker with his legs running in a odd way. “Go backwards to go forward!” Soon Deadpool flipped his top half up into the air reattaching it correctly and ran for the Joker. Deadpool pulled out his guns seeing Joker ready to throw a bomb at filly he aimed at the bomb in his palm and waited as he ran. The crazed clown threw the bomb leaving it inches from his gloved hand, Deadpool took aim and shot. The bullet impacted with the bomb exploding sending the Joker screaming and flailing threw the air battered and bloody. “Words of advice pedo clown.” Deadpool grabbed the Joker by the neck making him cough up blood. “Don’t ever! And I mean ever hurt kids, and just for putting two in danger.” Deadpool threw the Joker into the dirt and kicked him in the crotch, with Joker screamed his voice went to a higher pitch. Deadpool grabbed the Joker by the leg and tossing him up and down slamming the frail, crazy clown into the dirt leaving him dazed, grumbling in pain. Deadpool grabbed the Joker by the hair dragging him to a nearby toy train left by some young ponies, Deadpool pinned the Joker into the side of the train he cracked his knuckles, tightening his fists. “Now to give you a few good whoopins for blowing me up. Funny thing is I never beat anyone for blowing before.” Deadpool railed back, his fist hitting something hard with a thud. Superman walked up beside Deadpool. Little to his knowledge, Deadpool’s fist rubbed up against his crotch, paused in confusion and began to fondle Superman’s crotch. “Recycled Colossus joke?” Superman grabbed Deadpool by the scruff of his spandex suit and tossed into another track of the toy train making a broken dent in the plastic train. “Alright Deadpool you had your fun, no need to go overboard.” “Ugh… I thought your powers were gone…” Deadpool grumbled stuck in the plastic dent. “Superman’s powers are gone, but have returned for some odd reason. This world has some effects on him.” Batman appeared from seemingly nowhere handcuffing the Joker and lifting up his beaten limp body. “Oh great you brought your emo boyfriend too.” Deadpool joked while peeling himself free, the sound of cracking bones could be heard while Deadpool tried to move. Superman walked over picking up the limp anti-hero. “I might not be at my full strength, but I can still take you on easily.” Superman said. “Oh really? Is that the same you said when you battled Darkseid? Doomsday? Or any of your villains that no one cares about?” “Like you would know about them.” “I don’t, but the fanboys do! Isn’t that right, DCEU-ers!?” As Deadpool said that tons of loud voices could be heard over the Internet with angry comments, mostly from cynical, emo or incredibly angry 40 year old nerds turning a bright shade of red. A barrage of boos came with petitions to shut down Rotten Tomatoes “Who are you talking too?” Superman asked “I don’t know. Ask your rich boyfriend, more beloved Donald Trump?” Batman scowled at Deadpool while holding the Joker up to the train. “Hey don’t look at like that, your the one who freaks if aliens come to Earth.” “I do what I have to do to protect Gotham!” Batman roared turning away from the Joker and stumped up to the blabbering Anti-hero. “Same thing Trump says with America!” More boos came with people defending Batman and saying Deadpool’s overrated. While the two heroes listened to Deadpool’s blabbering the Joker slipped free from the cuffs and began to make a run for it. “And another thing… Oh hey BatTrump your ex is running away.” Deadpool pointed at the Joker laughing aloud as he skipped and ran. “JOKER!” Batman roared running after him. “Watch him Superman make sure he doesn't get away.” “Alone at last. So tell me boy scout do you bleed?” Deadpool asked, putting on the mask of Jigsaw. “What?” Superman asked in confusion, Deadpool reached into his pocket pulling out a rubber chicken slapping Superman with it. Superman blinked utterly dumbfounded. “Why did you do that?” “To distract you.” Deadpool pulled out a sword that was made of a green shining crystal Superman panicked letting Deadpool go backing away as he became much weaker. “A Kryptonite sword? How?” Superman in a panicked state asked as he backed away from Deadpool. “Simple Supy reasons.” Deadpool charged at Superman taking a swing. Superman dodged leaping to the train with Deadpool following behind. “Boy this could be a cool battle if this toy train started to go.” “Ready to play trains?” Button Mash’s voice could be heard as a giant shadows casts over the train, Button Mash and Featherweight stood over the train and with a flip of a switch the train started up making a train sound effect and began to run down the plastic tracks. “Perfect convenient timing, writers!” The train rushed down the tracks making it difficult for the two men to stay balanced Deadpool smiled devilishly under his mask and took a swing at Superman again making the hero jump back missing him. As the toy train began to gain more speed Deadpool backup and leaped up into the air swinging his sword up ready to strike down, Deadpool’s eyes widen when he saw Superman holding a sword holding it up clashing it with Deadpool’s. "WHAT!?! Hey writers what the Hell man why does he have a sword suddenly!” Its so it can be more of a fair fight Deadpool. “What fair fight! You didn’t care about fair fights when I blew his brains out in the first $#%@ chapter!” I’ve matured over the hiatus Deadpool. “‘Matured’? Really? You’re dealing with the most immature guy every written in media… better than those dumbass Paul brothers, but still.” The difference between you and the Paul brothers is that you're actually funny and entertaining. “Awww. You really love me.” Deadpool smiled happily under his mask little love hearts floating around his head, Superman delivered a powerful punch into Deadpool’s face sending him flying into another track. “Uhhhgg… I hhiinnk I ork ma aaww.” Deadpool snapped his bottom jaw back into place. “There we go, boy that would have been boring if I didn’t talk… Fox.” “Deadpool this has gone on far enough, you need to turn yourself in.” Superman demanded pointing the blade at Deadpool. “For?” Deadpool asked using his finger to push away the tip of the blade. “For attempting murder…” “Yeah gonna stop you there pal. Sorry, superhero BS, I’ll follow some, but letting crazy @#$@ faced psychopaths like Batman’s clown run free just so he can kill again, yeah sorry not gonna hold back the punches on that.” Deadpool used his feet to kick under Superman’s knocking him down giving Deadpool a chance to jump up and climb up the roof of the train cart. Deadpool got into a fighting stance as Superman jumped up landed on the cart the two swung at each other clashing swords. “Mines bigger!” “It’s not the size! It’s how you use it!” “... You got a tiny penis?” Deadpool asked. “Boy Lois must be a very desperate woman.” Superman roared pushing Deadpool forward making him lose balance and almost fall off the train, Superman ran at Deadpool making Deadpool take swing making the two metals clang loudly. “Cool. You got living action figures on the train Button.” Featherweight pointed at the two heroes fighting as the train went around in circles. “Huh… I didn’t add those.” Button Mash replied. “But cool! Let’s make this go faster!” “Whoa!” Deadpool felt the train going faster and faster making the heroes cling to the sides of the track. “I feel like this is that train scene from The Wolverine!” Superman punched the train, making everything shake, bouncing him and Deadpool onto the train. The train began to shake more and more, then making it derail. Everything went off, rolling along the floor, making loud noises… to them. Button Mash and Featherweight just saw their train jump off of it’s tracks and roll over to the side. “Ah come on!” Button complained. “I think we went too fast there.” Featherweight commented. Deadpool had landed flat into the dirt making a human sized imprint, Deadpool then pushed himself up cracking his back. “Well that was fun.” Deadpool mumbled he looked up seeing Superman running at him smashing his fist into his jaw sending him flying into another toy. “Ow…” Superman slowly walked towards Deadpool ready to take him away a giant brown hoof stomped near the red and blue hero, Button Mash stood over him looking down at him with a scowl. “You’ve been a bad toy! You wrecked the train and everything.” Button swipe up Superman and put him inside a jar. “Just for that you’ll be eating all the peas mom gives me.” And with that Button Mash and Featherweight marched off grabbing their toys and leaving Deadpool behind. “Yuck I hate peas.” Deadpool cringed. “... Hold up… what was I supposed to do again?” Rescue Cody with Spiderman, Claire, and Big Mac. “Oh right. Well sorry you distracted me with ice cream, and its been forever since this Fic was touched.” Deadpool slumped. “Man I wish I could have some right now.” Deadpool then made his way down through Ponyville, as the red Anti-hero walked for a bit and was stopped seeing a giant red furred and yellow hoof slamming down beside him. He looked up, seeing it was Big Mac with Claire and Spider-Man on his head. “There you are. Where were you?” Spider-Man asked. “Making nerds cry.” Deadpool walked up to Big Mac’s leg and climbed his way up to the top. “You too, if there’s not enough room.” “Nope.” Big Mac was quick to snap. “Wade we need to focus that kid you were trying to save might have been taken by Luna.” “How do you know?” “We went to Twilight this morning, she’s making arrangements for us to head to Canterlot right now.” “Sweet, I can praise the sun and save the kid.” Deadpool chuckled. “Come on Wade stop thinking on… That and more at the task at hand, please.” “FIIIIIIIIIIIINE!!! Let's make this Fic boring.” Deadpool slumped on Big Mac’s back, right on his hind legs. Big Mac looked back scowling back at him. “Please just a minute. And I’m not going between your big, thick, meaty, booty cheeks...” “Ahem! Not now.” While Spider-Man said that Big Mac looked away his eyes twitched seeing Deadpool not sitting on his flank. “Damn it Wade.” Between Big Mac’s flank cheeks Deadpool had slipped down between them going deep down between them to snuggle into the warm chubby red cheeks. “Ugh… Fine stay there but when we get ta Twilights your in trouble!” Big Macintosh walked smothering Deadpool into his chubby cheeks while he walked it was going to be a long way to Twilight’s. “Mmm… so cozy…” To Be Continued.