Jeff's Equine Misadventure

by Jeff Belinger

First published

Jeff Belinger, a master weaponsmith from a post apocalypse earth is displaced into Equestria

*Note: this is an alternate universe of Fallout crossovered with My Little Pony Anthro. This is based on a Game of Fallout Decay on Garry's Mod. You are warned, things may not make a lot of sense to you if you have never played Fallout Decay or Gmod in general*

On another beautiful day in the post war, post nuclear apocalyptic world of the American landscape, in the Mojave Desert, in an underground bunker, the Written in Blood group decided, after a successful raid on a Chinese Conglomerate science facility, to test out some newly acquired hardware, namely, a trans-dimensional portal device, and on such an occasion, the Brotherhood of Steel and Phoenix Company were assigned to guard duty. Rumors spread and people got curious as to what actually was going on.

Hilarity, and ponies, ensues.

The Portal

View Online

It was roughly around noon, local time, and the sun was high in the sky and the temperature only kept on rising. For the locals, this would be an average day if it wasn't for the fact there was a crowd around the local military bunker held by the mythical Brotherhood of Steel. Of course, since the Brotherhood of Steel was jealously guarding this base, there must be something going on inside.

Rumor had it that Written in Blood was conducting experiments with hardware acquired from a previous raid on the Chinese Conglomerate. The Raid had been organized by Written in Blood, lead by the Brotherhood of Steel and Phoenix Company and consolidated by a few other tagalong groups of wastelanders. Phoenix company was providing overwatch with their rangers as well as doing vehicular patrols around the bunker to prevent any raiders from taking potshots at the locals gathered at the gate of the base.

"Let us through you assholes, we wanna go in", said Roach, as he was stomping around, being a general nuisance to the power armored guards. A vocal majority cheered as Roached was failing to convince the guards from letting the crowd through. Knight Captain Quinn sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Roach, you know we can't let you in, we have specific orders to shoot to maim if anyone comes in. Besides, you know Elder Price, he has made a base so solid you won't even manage to break through without getting your butthole torn apart by at least three M-60 shooting down the hallway. Also, Elias said to me I could kill anyone of you if you start to riot like a bunch of monkeys", Quinn whined. This did not please Roach at all.

"Whatever, I'm just gonna put down my vendor and sell food to people who are starving around here", Roach said as he deployed his vending machine, solar panel and gas generator out of his Hammerspace inventory.

Inside the base, Jeff was making some ammunition for the rest of the Brotherhood of Steel, as they decided to resupply themselves with their gigantic stockpile of resources. Head Paladin Elias Burning was on edge, as per his usual. "I know something fucked up is going to happen, mark my words, something is going to go wrong with this experiment" Elias rambled on.

"Probably some abominations are going to spawn out of the portal and we're going to be stuck in here having to fight them and getting ourselves murdered".

Jeff gave a side glance at Elias and grunted. "You'd almost be correct if it wasn't for the fact that Price made sure to build a containment area near the portal, if anything happens, it's going to be stuck in the containment area". Jeff continued making the pulse ammunition through his pulse assembly station.

"There, I'm done with the pulse ammunition. A thousand rounds divided in batteries of fifty charges. Do you want me to make some microfusion cells for those of us using laser and plasma weapons" Jeff asked Elias.

"Yeah, sure, hold on, let me give you the resources for that" Elias answered as he handed him over the massive resources for the ammo. "Alright, " said Jeff, "I can make about thirty-five microfusion cells with that, hopefully we won't be needing more than that for the next two weeks".

Torres and Crucible were talking to each other near the command panel of the portal device. "I'm sure everything will be fine, It's not our first time messing with Conglo tech. What's the worse that can go wrong" asked Torres.

"We could literally open up a portal to hell and be overwhelmed by hideous monsters from another universe, or the portal was rigged to open up in mainland China and we'll be overwhelmed by Conglo guards" Deadpanned Crucible, ever the pessimistic one.

Leon Price walked over to his two friends and former Brotherhood member, now member of the reclusive Written in Blood faction. "So, gentlemen, are we ready to start the experiment?" Asked Leon Price, Elder of the Brotherhood of Steel of this region.

"Not yet, we're still missing someone to oversee to operation, we're waiting on Aesir", Crucible replied.

"Speaking of the Devil, I'm here you jackasses" Said the ghoul in his dry voice as he went through security.

"I saw you tightened security, Price, I even spotted the Phoenix Company lookouts over the dunes and hills and on vehicles around the base, You and Sheppard upgraded security since the last incident" Aesir said in a sarcastic tone.

"Yeah, we did that because last time was a clusterfuck and we ended up shooting each other" Said Price as he remembered the last large scale operation organized by Written in Blood.

"So, are we ready to start this show or do we have to wait some more, I assume you've already fixed all the possible hardware and software issues, correct" asked Aesir.

"Yep, everything's ready, we're about to-" but Torres was interrupted by the sound of the alarm being raised.

"Price! There's a bunch of Raiders on their way down to the Bunker, they're coming on vehicles from the south. It's a huge raiding party of about twelve or fifteen vehicles, no clear count, there's at least four armored personnel carriers and the rest are four seaters. Phoenix company has already started engaging them on vehicle, but at the speed they're going, they're gonna arrive within five minutes", stated Quinn over the squad radio to the rest of the base.

Jeff had finished making the ammunition and turned towards Elias. "I guess you half right, we are getting in trouble, but not from the portal. Alright, let me switch from my scribe robes to some actual armor and I'll get my M249 SAW". Elias picked up his M60 and went over to the gate of the base, passing through security gates.

Over up top, Quinn and his men were retreating back to the bunker's fortifications. The crowd that had gathered there previously had, for some, fled the area and the rest had decided to switch to their heavier armors and weapons to help defend from the raid in hopes of getting fat stacks of loot from the raiders. The Brotherhood of Steel didn't mind the extra civilian support, but it was going to be superfluous and an inconvenience since there would be more bodies between the Brotherhood of Steel and Phoenix Company.

Aesir laughed. "We can still do the experiment, Price's defenses are near impenetrable, the idiots won't stand a chance against Price's anvil and the hammer of Phoenix Company". Torres and Crucible looked at each other and winced.

"We'd prefer to defend from the attack first and then do the experiment, I mean, it's only logical-" Torres was interrupted.

"Don't you see, the raiders are here for the portal, they are thirsty for it, they know it's here because the people couldn't shut their loud mouths. We're doing the experiment now" Aesir declared.

Aesir went over the console, typed in the console, flipped a few switches and pressed the large red button. Unberknowst to them, Jeff had went around the barricades surrounding the portal device to put on his armor and grab his weapon from his Hammerspace inventory. At the moment the button was pressed, Torres threw a look over to the portal barricades and saw Jeff finished putting on his armor.

"JEFF WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THERE GET OUT WE'RE ACTIVATING THE PORTAL" Crucible yelled at Jeff, who was caught unaware.

"WHAT" Jeff said as the portal opened and started sucking air at an alarming rate, enough to throw Jeff to the ground. Jeff was gripping the floor as hard as he could, he was strong, but the vacuum was too strong for him.

Half of Jeff's body was through the portal already and slipped even further in every second.

"SHUT DOWN THE PORTAL, DO SOMETHING", Torres yelled at Aesir.

"I can't. If I close the portal now, he'll be cut in half, believe me we don't want that, its his stupid fault for being there in the first place" Aesir said in his raspy voice. Torres, Crucible and Aesir could only watch as Jeff was slowly engulfed into the portal and into another dimension.

It was a warm day in Equestria, a few clouds had been placed by the weather patrol, a typical day in Ponyville. Twilight was in the library of her castle, going over some magical treaties about Swift Wit's advanced conjuration spells. It was a relaxing for Twilight, she liked to keep up to date with the new spells being developed by Celestia's Academy for gifted unicorns. Everything was normal until a tear in the fabric of reality opened fifteen meters away from Twilight. Twilight turned around confused and utterly flabbergasted.

"What's going on now" She asked.

"This better not be me trying to tell myself about some terrible thing that would happen again" Twilight groaned as she went over the portal, her hair being blown by the incoming wind. Suddenly, something came out of the portal. At first Twilight wasn't sure, what it was, legs being pulled by the wind force, then, an entire person.

Twilight was curious, but cautious about this stranger. The portal closed and the wind subsided, leaving twilight's hair in a mess. The person on the ground grunted and picked himself up and whatever machine that was next to him. The creature had his back turned to Twilight, she was about five feet four inches tall, but the man was about five feet eleven inches tall wearing some sort of armor made of metal and Kevlar. The man turned around, weapon in hands.

"Where, the fuck am I now?" Jeff said as he was awed by the crystalline walls of the castle. Twilight cringed as she heard the man curse.

"Language mister! I don't know who you are and where you come from, but this is no way to talk in a civilized society" Twilight said as she undid the mess that was her hair.

Jeff looked over the purple skinned person in front of her. "Ok, I'll apologize for swearing, but you have to tell me where I am and who you are" the large man said inquisitorialy.

Twilight scoffed and answered. "You're in my library, in my castle in Ponyville. Now tell me who you are".

"My designation is Senior Scribe TEC77-5-13, my name is Jeff Belinger, Brotherhood of Steel". This only confused Twilight further.

"Ok, that doesn't tell me anything except you might be some sort of warrior from another dimension, maybe" Twilight said as she started walking around Jeff, examining him closely.

"Well, I'don't exactly know where "Ponyville" is but looking at you, little missy, you obviously aren't the warrior type, more of a scholar I presume?" Jeff Said as he followed Twilight with his eyes.

"Well, you're at least sensible and able to make rational thought, so there's at least that. This is a weapon in your hands, right? I've never seen anything like it before", Twilight questioned the man.

Jeff Was getting a bit tired of the questions, but he knew it couldn't be helped. What if she had been dragged into their world, she would have been made prisoner immediately and questionned by Elias and Price for a good three hours.

"Well, as much as I want to answer more question, I need to know if there's any danger around here, if there's any threats to my life right now", the senior scribe asked.

"Threats? In Ponyville, maybe some things in the Everfree forest, but nothing came out of there for a good two years now" Twilight said as she giggled.

"I'd still like to go see how the outside looks, just to understand exactly where I am, if you can understand what I mean, this is a new land and I need to get some bearings".

"Of course, we'll go over to a balcony, you'll be able to see outside and get a feel for what the world looks like." Twilight told Jeff.

They walked outside of the library and into a corridor going along the circular shape of the castle. They arrived at the main balcony at the front of the castle and Jeff saw something he'd never seen before.

"The land is green and fertile with life, there's no violence outside, no gunshots in the distance, you can actually hear the birds singing, and not just crows, this place looks beautiful, nothing like Earth" Jeff told Twilight.

"Wait, no greenery, no birds, no violence? What kind of world do you come from" Twilight asked.

"A wounded world, ravaged by war, torn by greed and ravished by evil".

"So that's why you have this armor and big weapon with you" Twilight assumed. "Yes, If you don't mind, I'd like to take off my armor if nothing dangerous is going to be coming our way, also store my weapon and ammunition too, if you wouldn't mind" Jeff said.

"Oh, of course, I'll take you to a vacant room of the castle for you to use during your stay here, obviously you won't be going back to your world for a while". Twilight and Jeff walked and went to a vacant guest room where Jeff could stay. Jeff took off his armor and placed it back in his hammerspace inventory as well as his ammo and M249 SAW.

"Wait, you can do magic? where did your armor and weapon go" Asked Twilight.

"Well, that's the beauty of this little device here, " Jeff pointed at his arm, where a wrist mounted computer device was placed. "This might not be a Pip-boy brand wrist computer, but it does essentially the same thing, it also allows me to build things and have a garage of vehicle in hammerspace, a private place between world if I go by what Crucible told me, a real marvel of technology this thing".

"Wow, we don't have that kind of technology here in Equestria-" Twilight said as she was interrupted by the chuckle of Jeff.

"Equestria, what are you, horse aficionados in your world".

"I'm a pony, for your information, and if you want to see a horse, maybe you should go to Saddle Arabia" Twilight said as Jeff laughed even harder.

"Okay, Okay, this explains the long face and the hooves, but not your horn, what are you, a magic unicorn princess or something" Jeff laughed with a tear in his eye.

Twilight unfurled her wings from her back and displayed them to him.

"Ok, winged unicorn, that's even more into fantasy than I imagined" said Jeff as he tried to compose himself. "Yes, I'm an alicorn princess as a matter of fact, the princess of friendship-" Twilight had been yet again interrupted by Jeff laughing his life away.

"Princess of friendship, okay, that's pretty good, I'll take you at your word because i have no choice, but this is funny to me, because" Jeff laughed more "Because in my world, people are real dic- jerkbags".

Jeff Stopped laughing and composed himself. "Anyway, now that I'm here, I'd like to actually do something productive. I'm a weapons manufacturer, but I also dabble into mechanics and medical sciences, oh, I'm a mean cook in my spare time as well".

"Oh, wow, you have a variety of fields, what's your cutie mark like" Twilight asked

"My cutie-what now?"

A Vacation

View Online

"Your cutie mark, you silly goose, the mark you get once you find out your special talent" Twilight said in a mildly mocking way.

"Here I'll show you mine" Twilight said as she lifted up her shirt a slight bit and lowered the waist of her skirt a tiny bit, revealing a purple six-pointed star over a white six-pointed star surrounded by smaller white six-pointed stars.

"Okay, first you didn't need to do that and second, the closest thing I have on me would be my initiation tattoo from the Brotherhood of Steel that has my serial number as well, but that's completely different nature of thing from your... Cutie mark"

"What's so different from your tattoo and my cutie mark", asked Twilight

"Well, as much as this tattoo has a meaning to me and the Brotherhood of steel, other people can get other tattoos for a variety of different reasons, like most Raiders will have tribalistic tattoos related to their specific clan, or other will have tattoos because they just feel like body-modding themselves" Jeff explained to Twilight who still didn't seem to quite grasp what Jeff meant to convey

"Ok, let me explain it to you another way: we don't earn these tattoos for finding our special talent in life, we get them because we either want to or have to, and most pay up in currency their tattoos" Jeff explained.

"Oh, that makes sense now. I'm still curious about your tattoo, may I see it" Twilight asked with a large smile on her face.

"Sure, here, it's on my left shoulder, standard practice for the Brotherhood of Steel", Jeff agreed. He lifted up the small sleeve of his green T-shirt, revealing the medium sized symbol of the Brotherhood of Steel and codebar underneath it

"There was one recruit that wanted his tattoo over his left butt cheek, but we forcibly told him it would be against standard protocol, although I think our elder has his over his heart, which isn't too much against standard protocol", Jeff added as Twilight studied the tattoo closely.

"I'd like to know more about the symbology behind the crest of your brotherhood" Twilight asked the Scribe.

"Ah, now this is something every member of the brotherhood of steel is taught from the very beginning. The gears represent our combined scientific and engineering knowledge, the sword represents our strength and will to defend ourselves," Jeff went on. "The wings represent the hope through the acquisition of lost technology that mankind will one day return to a semblance of civilization, the circle represents our fraternal unity that makes us a true brotherhood"

"And through combat and pain do we tighten our bonds to one another" Jeff added.

"So essentially you can go on through life thanks to friendship and love, that's admirable" Twilight said.

"Come on, I want you to meet my friends, Jeff" Twilight said as she walked toward the door to the hallway.

"Are you sure, I mean, I'm not a Pony like you, I'm not going to go unnoticed by the rest of the population" Jeff said with worry in his voice

"Don't worry, no one will be bothering you, maybe a few curious looks, but you're with me and everyone knows that if there's strange things going on, me and my friends are always on the case" Twilight told Jeff as they left the room and went through the hallway down to another room.

Twilight knocked at the door "Starlight! I have somepo- huh, well, in this case not really a pony... We have a guest and I want you to meet him" Twilight said. The door opened up and Starlight answered the door

"Hey Twilight, I was just going through some spellbook again, so who's this-" Starlight tried to say as she saw the man next to Twilight.

"Okay, that's new, who's this? He obviously isn't a pony at first glance, well, maybe some odd earth pony, but no, his head is too different to be as a pony. He looks almost like... A hairless monkey?" Starlight said full of questions

"Okay, thanks for calling me a monkey, I mean, mankind descends from the chimpanzee, but you didn't need to express it that way" Jeff deadpanned.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to convey that you were a monkey, oh my gosh now I look like a fool" Starlight said embarrassingly.

"No offense taken, I've been called a whole lot worse by people" Jeff said casually.

"What do you mean by that", questioned Starlight.

"I can tell you all of these things a little later, Twilight said she was going to gather her friends so I could meet them", Jeff answered

"That's right! It won't take too long, I'll start by getting Rainbow Dash so she can get Applejack, then I'll get the rest of the girls" Twilight said to the two, "Starlight, can you show Jeff the Cutie Map room for me? We'll be gathering there as per usual".

Starlight agreed and lead Jeff into the room while Twilight teleported to the front of the castle in a flash of purple and white light.

"Did she just blink?" Jeff asked Starlight.

"How do you know that's the name of the spell?" Starlight said surprised.

"I didn't, it's what scientists in my world call it when something or someone teleports from one place to another instantly" Jeff answered.

Starlight nodded and the two continued to talk about what some links between the science of his world and the magic of this one. It took about twenty minutes, but Twilight came back with her friends in tow, Rainbow dash lazily flying above the group and pinkie pie skipping as per her usual. Jeff had spawned office chairs from his Hammerspace Prop menu for himself and Starlight as the assigned thrones around the map were not theirs.

"Ooooh, who's this new friend of yours Twilight", Pinkie asked.

"My name is Jeff", Jeff answered

Pinkie Pie's face turned into a huge grin, unable to contain herself, she exploded into laughter.

"AH! His name is Jeff" Pinkie continued on laughing at the seemingly invisible humor of Jeff's name continuously hit her like a hammer.

"Pinkie, what is so funny about Jeff's name", asked a perplexed rarity.

"Yeah, I mean, it's a weird name, but I don't see what's funny" Rainbow Dash said as she landed next to her seat.

"Oh, nothing, the readers will understand the joke, though" Pinkie answered as she winked towards no particular pony.

The rest of the ponies took their assigned seat. Twilight cleared her throat to gather the attention of everyone.

"So let me explain how Jeff came into this world-", Twilight tried to say as she was interrupted by Pinkie Pie.

"Oh! Oh! Did he come through an inter-dimensional portal from another universe where ponies don't exist and there's gratuitous violence and pain everywhere", Pinkie chirped.

"That would sum it up nicely, yes", Jeff said dumbfounded. "How do you happen to know so much about my world".

"I don't, It's just Pinkie Sense" Pinkie answered.

"Pinkie-what now?" Jeff asked.

"Don't worry about that" the rest of the ponies said in unison, to the surprise of Jeff.

"Alright then, I guess it's time for me to explain where I'm from and how I got here", Jeff said and explained his circumstance to the ponies. After he was done talking about the particulars of how he ended up in Equestria, he explained a few things from his perspective about the world he was from and how things worked for people.

"Wow", Said Applejack, "Life is terrible where you're from, especially when you arrive in the area, deprived of any belongings or essentials like that, I don't think a lot of ponies, uh, I mean people would make it out like you did Jeff".

"No, not everyone makes it to a decent living standard, heck I still survive on beans and water for the most part, some poorer people only live by watermelons and oranges", Jeff added.

"Listening to your story made me realize how much better we have it in Equestria compared to Earth" Fluttershy said.

"Yeah, but Earth wasn't always like that, before The Great War, The world was doing better, but not by that much. Countries were contesting every resource they could. Metal deposits, fuel, even solar energy", Jeff explained. "Anything that could grant an edge to some opposing nation, or sometimes even an allied nation, was meant to be contested".

"When the last bit of oil in the world was discovered in Alaska, China attacked America to contest it. America retaliated in full force. At first, the Chinese were hard to fight against due to their superior numbers and stealth technology, but we persevered and broke through thanks to power armor, turning trained men into walking tanks with weapons normally serviced by crews of men now held by a single man"

"Was that what you were wearing when you came through the portal", Twilight asked.

"Yes, although this was a lighter, more agile suit of power armor, normally power is much more heavily clad in steel alloys and ceramics than my own power armor", Jeff answered

"So how long are you going to be here?" Rainbow asked.

"I'm not entirely sure, I have a quite a bit of my own food and water, so I won't be taxing on your own food", Jeff answered.

"Nonsense, you can eat all the foods you want here", Twilight said.

Jeff nodded. For a while more, Jeff talked about his experiences through the Wasteland and some curious encounters, also deals he ended up doing with other people. He also explained that somehow, death wasn't the end of someone's life in his world, that you could reappear in some places, but with equipped gear missing and the only way to truly end one life was to simply vanish into nature, never to be seen again. He then went on about the various factions and groups in the Wasteland. Time went by and Jeff grew tired of explaining the many various things in the Wasteland.

"Well, if I can trust my watch, it's almost four in the afternoon, you girls probably want to head home for dinner soon, so I'll let you be and enjoy the rest of the evening fiddling with my guns and do inventory management", Jeff concluded

The girls went home and the night came. Jeff went to his room and layed down on the bed

"I wonder how long I'll be here".

Return home

View Online

It had a week days since Jeff arrived. Jeff had participated in the various activities of the various ponies in town. His first day after arriving was spent helping Applejack on her farm collecting apples. Jeff had taken care of plants before, but not trees or animals since most animals in the Wasteland were feral and savage. Jeff made mistakes here and there that only served to bruise his ego, and stain some clothes, but nothing too damaging was done to him.

On his second day, Jeff went to Rarity's boutique, at first he wasn't sure what was going to happen, but it quickly became clear he was going to serve as a model for Rarity's men's line of clothing. Jeff wasn't alone however, Big Macintosh, whom he had met the day before, was also there to also serve as a model since both of them were rather large men in the taller, buffer end of things. The two of them shared a common disliking to what was taking place and both silently agreed they'd definitively never do this again.

On his third day, Jeff was asked to come spend some time at Fluttershy's cottage. On arrival there he was met with a large gathering of wild animals like the which he'd never seen before. All of them were friendly to Jeff, something he had a hard time understanding. When Jeff realized that Fluttershy could actually communicate with these creatures, Jeff went from impressed to confused. She could talk to the animals like they were another person, each of them with a different personality. When Jeff thought he had seen it all, Jeff was met with a rather strange old man with white hair, a strange outfit and yellow and red eyes. This man floated above the ground, appeared out of nowhere and yet could break physics like it were nothing but putty to him. Discord was his name and he wasn't very impressed with Jeff. Discord gave him trouble for a while. When Jeff decided he had enough of Discord's shit, he pulled a gun out of his hammerspace inventory and threatened Discord to stop fucking with him unless he wanted to be made into pavement paint. Discord laughed but took the threat seriously and stopped messing with Jeff. Fluttershy scolded both of them and made them truce using her Stare.

On his Fourth day, Jeff went to the Sugar Cube Corner to help Pinkie Pie with an order she had gotten for a small birthday party that was going to happen the next day. Jeff was a decent cook, but he'd never made pastry before. Pinkie pie first explained how things worked and showed him by making a first batch of cupcakes, but Jeff didn't quite follow. Jeff explained he knew cooking was like an artistic science and from what he could see, pastry making was more science at first, and then art at the last part. Pinkie understood and changed into a lab coat and glasses with a nose and mustache and explained the fundamental basis of pastry making in detail. in roughly fifteen minutes, Jeff somehow mastered the art of pastry making and quickly went along at about the same pace as pinkie pie for the duration of the day. Jeff actually liked that day, it was productive and interesting.

On his fifth day, He went to see Rainbow Dash who wanted to spend her time relaxing on her cloud. As Jeff couldn't exactly do that, he convinced her to bring her cloud somewhere closer to the ground and asked her about what she usually does around town. She answered that in the early morning she does weather team things like setting up the clouds, recording the pressure in the atmosphere and order more clouds from Cloudsdale. Jeff was satisfied with the answer, but he wanted to know if there was anything they could do for a part of the day. Rainbow Dash had the idea of introducing him to the Daring Do books. Jeff read a part of the first book, but didn't exactly like the genre. She did have a book by Pram Stoker called Pracula. Jeff had read the original book by Bram Stoker's Dracula on Earth, but he was intrigued by the Equine version and decided to read it.

On his Sixth day, Jeff decided to spend some time with Twilight and Starlight. He wanted to know more about magic, although he couldn't do any of it. Twilight and Starlight showed him the principles and basics of magic, essentially a one-oh-one course. Jeff made parallels between the magic of this universe and the science from his home and Twilight was curious about that. Although Jeff wasn't the biggest science expert, he did know about ballistic physics, engineering and a bit of medical sciences. Jeff showed them the how to make the various types of Stimpacks using nothing but common plants and sterile syringes. Jeff explained to them how Stimpacks essentially served as a booster to the body's natural healing process, making the body regenerate on its own faster. Twilight and Starlight took note of this and decided to send a proper document to the Surgeon General of Equestria.

On the morning of the seventh day, Jeff was woken up quite drastically to the panicking sounds of Twilight, Starlight and Spike yell at something. Jeff took his M249 SAW and went to the library, where the noise was coming from. Jeff saw a squad of power armored people holding M60s. Twilight and Starlight were inside of a magical dome protecting them from any harm, but it wouldn't last long against the power of focused M60 fire.

"WHERE IS HE", Elias yelled at the two ponies.

"I'm here Elias, these ponies have been taking care of me for a week straight, don't harm them", Jeff said.

"Hold your fire men", elias said to his squad. "Jeff get back over here right now".

"Just hold on Elias, I'm fine, stop threatening these girls".

"Jeff just get over here now and we can fuck off of this place", Elias insisted.

"ELIAS FOR FUCK'S SAKE CALM YOUR SHIT AND LISTEN TO ME. These people, these ponies, as they call themselves, they are literally the friendliest, most harmless being in existence, there's nothing dangerous about them at all, whatsoever, just come look at the outside and you'll see what I mean", Jeff told elias.

Elias ordered his men to hold the portal until he was back. Jeff lead him to the balcony he first admired the landscape on.

"Look at this Elias, a world free of radiation, of mutation, of any kind of harm done to anyone or anything. its beautiful, its bountyful, its just a world free of woes" Jeff explained.

"I see, well, we have to go back anyways because Price is waiting for us", Elias said sternly.

"Yea, I've been here a week and I already started feeling soft" Jeff complained

"A WEEK? you were gone for seven hours for us, we beat the raiders, most of them died, the rest retreated like dogs with their tails between their legs" Elias said proudly

"Seven hours? that's it, wow, the time dilation is too real." Jeff said aghast.

Elias and Jeff went back to the portal and Jeff turned towards Twilight and Starlight.

"I guess this is it girls, I'm going back home, thank you for your time and patience with me. hopefully maybe we'll see eachother again" Jeff said.

Jeff followed the troops back to the portal and went through, leaving Equestria.

Jeff, Elias and the rest of the Squad reappeared through the portal, closing behind them. Jeff sighed in relief that he was home, but also in sadness that he had to leave such a nice place.

"Status report elias" Price asked Elias.

"Package retrieved successfully without any kind of conflict", Elias reported.

"Good, now Jeff, you're going to be off duty for a while to recover from this experience", Leon told Jeff

"I don't need to sir, I've done all the resting I needed in that world. I'm ready to go back to my duties." Jeff told Leon.

"Alright then,. if you say so, God knows what you've been through."

"The worse I got was being messed with by a reality warper, think The Hatter but nicer and much less hallucinogenic gasses"

"That doesnt sound so bad then. Well, happy to have you back among us Jeff, and please, next time, dont equip your stuff in front of a portal", Leon scolded Jeff.