The Marriage of Princess Twilight Sparkle

by Prismfire Productions

First published

It is finally Twilight's wedding day! Who is the lucky stallion? It is somepony or rather...something nopony expected

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this stallion and mare in holy matrimony..."

The most joyful words to any relationship, the start of their wedding. For Twilight it has been long overdue and with her being the last of her friends to tie the knot, it was not a matter of if but when. When the day arrives, Twilight gives her family and friends a shock by what she is marrying.

Inspired in part by Damaged's "Extra Cheesy" and "Totally Cheesy"

The Wedding of Princess Twilight Sparkle

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At last the day had come...

Princess Twilight Sparkle was in her bedroom looking pretty confident with herself and as she stood facing the full length mirror she couldn't help but use this time to reflect on her close friend's weddings. First it was Rainbow to Pinkie, then Rarity to Blueblood (who actually was a nice stallion in private), Flutters to Discord, Spike to Ember, and then Applejack to Caramel.

She had been there for each one and gave them her full support, now those same friends were going to be there for her as she trotted down the aisle and be married to her one true love, something that started out of interest and developed into so much more that. She smiled at the way he made her feel, like she was on the softest of clouds, there for her whenever she needed some pony to talk to or just for company. He had grown a little "harder around the edges" as time went on and their relationship progressed, but he always kept a soft spot just for her.

She was interrupted from her dream-like state by Spike knocking on the door. "Hey Twilight, how much longer is it going to take for you to get ready? Only reason I ask is because my kids are getting a bit restless and it is 5 till noo-" He, and the poor bedroom door, were sent flying across the hall by the sheer force of Twilight knocking it down in a panic and lassoing Spike and his kids in her magic before teleporting to Canterlot Castle and breaking into a full gallop heading towards the throne room.

"Oh no, I am going to be late for my own wedding! Good thing my soon-to-be hubby agreed to let me teleport him in after I got to the alter, hay it was his idea since he wanted everypony to be surprised." Twilight mindlessly rattled off in a clearly desperate attempt to calm herself down and making it to the entrance with one minute to spare, giving Spike enough time to get him and his kids back to their seats and her a last minute look over, thankfully her dress and everything was still perfect.

The doors opened and everypony stood as "Here Comes the Bride" began to be played by Mrs. Cheerilee on the organ. As she trotted down the aisle towards the alter she looked at her friend's reactions; Rainbow and Pinkie were fighting back tears, Rarity was bawling like a baby, Flutters and Discord gave a silent nod, Spike was understandably preoccupied, and Applejack tipped her hat. She then moved to her family, each of them sharing the same expression of joy , even Flurry Heart had a smile on her face as she look to her aunt. Twilight then reached the alter where Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were at, the room went quiet as the music stopped, and everypony sat down.

"Dearly beloved, we are here today to marry this mare and her stallion in holy maretrimony..." Celestia began with a smile as a bright flash filled the room signaling the arrival of the lucky stallion, everypony's attention glued to the bright sphere of Twilight's magic that would reveal the new Mr. Sparkle. When the glow faded everypony's, including the Royal Sisters', jaws dropped at the sight. Instead of a strong stallion there was a wheel of cheese, finely aged Gouda to be exact and an awkward silence filled the room until Celestia hesitantly continued while trying to keep a straight face to hold in her laughter. "Do you Twilight take Edam Gouda to be your lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, in good times and bad, and be loyal and faithful as long as you both shall live?"

"Indeed I do Princess Celestia." Twilight said with an ear to ear smile, the true awkwardness then hit as the room fell so silent you could hear a passing cricket softly chirping as they waited for Princess Celestia to continue. However after a few minutes, murmurs started to grow and Twilight's smile began to fade as Celestia started whispering to Luna.

"What are you waiting for Lulu? It is time for your half of the ceremony...."

"You can't be serious Tia, you want me to marry Twi to a wheel of cheese? Please tell me there is some kind of law that prevents ponies from marrying inanimate objects...or at least something along those lines."

"Relax dear sister, there has to be plenty of objections based on what we hear our subject's are saying."

"Oh right..." Luna the cleared her threat to silent the crowd before looking at the cheese with a "am I really doing this?" look. "And do you Edam Gouda take Twilight Sparkle to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, in good times and bad, and he loyal and faithful as long as you both shall live?"

A silence then persisted for a span of about 15 seconds before Twi spoke. "Edam says "I do" as well your Highness." Everypony stared at Twilight like she had lost her mind, but then again, she was marrying a whell of cheese so that assumption could not be that far from the truth.

Luna then continued. "If any of you believe these two should not bet wed, speak now or forever hold your peace." She had a small smile when she said those words, backed up when objections came from all over the room but Twilight silenced them with one word.

ENOUGH"" Twilight boomed a Royal Canterlot Voice that not even Celestia and Luna could match since she put her emotions into it. "Are you seriously going to condem me for loving Gouda? If it was the other way around and any of you were up here I would give you my best wishes, but this is how you all act!? Every single one of you, especially you Cadance since you are the Princess of Love, should be ashamed of yourselves. I am going to be curt and straight to the point, if you don't want me with Gouda them you are gonna have to kill me and I don't care what any of you say or think."

Celestia stepped up, seeing the pure fury in Twi's eyes. "Then I pronounce you cheese and wife, you may kiss the bride."

Twilight leaned in and gave a small kiss and her wings unfurled to a round of applause. "By the way everypony Gouda got me pregnant." There was a hushed silence of shock before Pinkie, who was wearing Dash's shades, spoke up.

"Seems like you had a Gouda time."

Everypony, including Twilight, facehoofed in unison as the wedding drawed to a close.

Always a Gouda Time

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-Ponyville General Hospital-

To this day, nopony knew how it had happened, and most did not want to know. Everyone of Twilight's family members and friends; including the princesses, Discord, and Starlight, were fidgeting in their seats. They had gathered all after Twilight had sent a mass letter out to them that her water had broke, and everypony rushed as soon as they could to her. Despite the anxious atmosphere of the waiting room, one individual was relaxing in his seat patiently waiting for the nurse to come in. His hardened looks had not changed a bit since his wedding 7 months prior, which everypony swore on their souls that Twi had slowed his aging processes to the minimum. After what felt like an eternity, Nurse Redheart came in from the delievery room.

"Before I get swarmed..." The nurse said in a tone that made everypony, even the princesses, slide back into their seats. "Twilight is very exausted from the heavy labor and delivery, but I am glad to report both she and the foals are in perfect health."

Everypony's jaws dropped, even Discord himself could not believe his ears. Even with all the chaos he had caused over the years, this was a curveball he never expected. Sure, the fact he had a daughter with Fluttershy caused a big stink, and Screwball had caused even bigger ones to the point Discord nearly sued Canterlot's diaper company for false advertising.

"Did you say foals ...as in more than one?" The former Lord of Chaos asked, he was so shocked he quit floating and sat down in a chair himself.

"Yes," Redheart replied with a kind smile. "in fact, Twilight had three foals."

Before anyone in the room could faint from the shocking news Spike came running down the hallway. "Nurse Redheart! Twilight wanted me to come and request that she see everyone who is here as soon as you allow it."

"So soon after delivery?" Redheart asked with a quizzical raised eyebrow.

He sighed. "She took a sip of double expresso from Barebucks. That gave her enough of a boost to cast a self-replenishment spell, keep in mind this the same mare who solved one of Starswirl's unfinished spells."

The nurse's glare sterned. "Who gave her the coffee?"

"I did". Thorax said trotting down the hall. "Teleported it right to her after she had Spike send me a messege by dragonfire. I suggest you let the others in because a cranky Twi is a scary Twi...and I do not think this hospital is fireproof..."

That killed the statement Redheart was going to say about rules and regulations in her throat. She knew Twi was a smart and levelheaded mare, and cared about everypony, but even she knew it was a bad idea to get on the Princess of Friendship's bad side. She had seen firsthoof what Twi can do when angered, and it was a sight that would haunt the poor nurse for the rest of her days.

"You have a point there Prince Thorax..." Redheart finally conceded. "Spike, would you be so kind as to take them in?"

The dragon smiled. "Of course I will, just follow me everyone." He lead them down the hall to the recovery room that Twilight currently occupied. When they got there, a sight presented itself that made them feel warm inside but also confused.

Twilight was sitting up in her bed caressing a baby filly in her forehooves, the other two drinking from her teats. It was heartwarming to see Twilight in that state, a mare basking in the glow and joy of being a new mother. It was a feeling that Twilight Velvet and Cadance knew all too well, and it was a feeling they cherished even to this day.

"Hello everyone," Twi said with a smile so bright Pinkie nodded in respect. "Come over to see my foals, but please be quiet as possible."

They did as they were told and trotted over as quietly as they could. The unicorn filly being held in Twi's hooves was a soft white, assented by a few streaks of violet that outlined where her mane and tail was at. The thing that seemed odd was the fact there were tiny holes in her, similar to a changeling's.

"This little cutie here is Alpen Stock." Twi said nuzzling the filly in question. "Before any of you ask, she appears to be made from swiss cheese, hence the holes, but to be clear she is not a changeling...that I know of..."

She hoofed Alpen over to Twilight Velvet before bringing the next one up to be cuddled. The colt was also a unicorn and looked very similar to his "father", in fact, the only way you could tell that it was Twilight's foal was because of the fact he had the same eye color as his mother. A lovely yellow coat, with a red striped mane, tail, and bright red hooves were his other features.

"Chedci here seems to be cheddar, and I done had to zap Thorax to keep him away from this little guy." Twi said with a glare at the aforementioned changeling.

"Look I said I was sorry Twi..." Thorax said looking at the ground. "So who is the other little colt?"

"This little Earth Pony is CJ...after all, he is Colby-Jack." Twi said stroking his back as he kept drinking from her teat.

"Oh?" Celestia smirked. "We now have AJ and CJ, now we just need a-"

Luna slapped her wing across Tia's muzzle to silence her. "Sister, there is a time and place for everything, but unless you were gonna say "DJ" I suggest you keep your muzzle shut around the young ones."

"I kindly agree..." A male voice, one none of them recognized, said from behind them. They all nearly jumped out their fur when they turned and saw an Earth Pony stallion that could not be anypony but Gouda. He was tall, maybe beating out Big Mac by an inch or two, and had the muscles to match. Everyone just stared with their muzzles slack, and slightly drooling, as he trotted over to Twi.

"So how did-..." Rainbow Dash stared to say but was cut off by her wife.

"That is for another time and another story Dashie." Pinkie giggled before facing the far wall of the room. "It is up to you readers!"