Let's Make America Great Again
Once upon a time, after her great adventures, Twlight Sparkle was wondering what to do that week. She had picked up her life from where she left it and wanted to make something from it. Then all the sudden a strange woman appeared on Twlight Sparkle's doorstep. She was hiden beneath a long cloak and had long brown nails on her fingers. Her dirty hair fluished down from beneath the cloak and she had glowing eyes!
"You are not who you think you are!" said the strange woman.
"What do you mean?" said Twlight Sparkle
"You are not who you think you are," she said again with a mysterious crackling voice like a bad radio transmission.
"I still don't understand you?" said the lavender unicorn.
"Here, take this," she said and gave Twlight Sparkle an alarmclock.
"Take this and give it to your parents or guardian, they will know what to do with it!"
And with that she disappeared before Twlight Sparkle's eyes!
Twlight Sparkle was confused but thought that she had to do something. But rather than going to her parents or guardian, Twlight Sparkle decided to show it to Sunburst.
"Oh no," said Sunburst, "you must forget about this!"
"Why?" enquired the lavender unicorn, "what do you know?!"
"I... I can't tell you. My dear Twlight Sparkle, I didn't think it would be this soon!"
"What?!" yelled the lavender unicorn, "are you keeping things away from me?!"
"It's .... it's for your own good! You cannot know this!" said Sunburst and before Twlight Sparkle could do anything, Sunburst had escaped her grasp.
"No! Dammit! When will I ever know the truth?!"
Twlight Sparkle was feeling depressed. One of her best friends abandoned and betrayed her. It hurt. So the lavender unicorn wanted to find Rainbow Dash. After their adventure, Twlight Sparkle and the athletic pegasus had been spending a lot of time together. Twlight Sparkle kind of started to like her and after Twlight Sparkle had only recently discovered that she was bisexual, Rainbow Dash seemed like the perfect girl to be around with!.
So the lavender unicorn went to Rainbow Dash and told the whole story. She listened to Twlight Sparkle without saying a single word.
Then she said: "WTF, this is sooo big"
And Twlight Sparkle said: I know! Do you know a way to find out what is happening? Why is everyone hiding things from me?!"
Rainbow Dash sighed and said: "You have always been special, Twlight Sparkle and not just to me."
"How do you know that?"
Rainbow Dash looked at the balloon that Twlight Sparkle had received and said: "it kind of looks like the The Iron Dildo, doesn't it?"
"could be...but it might not be...but, yeah,certainly it might be"
"Whatever it is, I can recognise it quite well. And I think," the blue pegasus said, "that perhaps the mysterious woman wanted you to find something inside of you.
"Inside? Like my heart?"
"No, don't be silly, like a mamory. Think about it, if your parents lied to you and now Sunburst doesn't want to talk to you about your background, perhaps there is a hidden memory in your head!"
the athletic pegasus's logic was flawless. So Twlight Sparkle had to try it!
So Twlight Sparkle concentrated on the object. immeditately she felt drawn into it. It stated ouit as a vague, fuzzy thing like when you wear glasses and there is a lot of moisture in the air and you see a fudge sickle on the horizon.
But then it turned out that there was a secret memory, hidden beneath the vail layer of self-loving in her head.
And within that memory, a burning figure appeared. It was Discord! In hell...
The lavender unicorn was confused. She didn't think that memory would be in there, and yet it was there, burning like the heart of a newborn star and the centre of the earth.
Everyone who looked could see there was a undeniably, ravenous animal attraction between The lavender unicorn and Donald Trump.
No one could deny it.
No one except The God-Emperor and The lavender unicorn, that is.
They seemed blissfully unaware of their attraction to each-other. Unaware of their boundless uncontrollable lust.
Every time they met they didn't show it, but everyone knew. Everyone knew what was really going on between them.
A war of lust.
And everyone knew that it was a unsuitable situation. No one wanted to be dragged into that war.
Something had to be done.Or someone.
In the middle of all this, finally,Andromielle could stand it no longer.
She found The lavender unicorn, and pulled them to one side
"Thats it! its ruining the team. Its clear you cant function while The God-Emperor is around!"
"What no! I am fine."
"No. Its very clear. You need to do the Doodling with them"
Everyone else in the room nodded at this.
"But doing the doodling with Donald Trump...isn't that..umm...wrong?"
"Oh, sure, its wrong. Very very wrong.
But just because somethings wrong doesn't mean it shouldn't happen does it?"
"No, I suppose not"
The lavender unicorn wondered off thinking of the doodling....how will she introduce the idea to Donald Trump? and would they accept it?
Twlight Sparkle finally found a moment to pull The God-Emperor away from the others, to have a private moment.
"The lavender unicorn we have to do it"
"I know, my team told me as well. Apparently our feelings are causing problems for everyone else."
"So we are agreed? We finally let our feelings out of their cages of repression they have been caged in all this time?"
"Yes. For the team"
"No...for us"
The lavender unicorn leapt on Donald Trump at that moment.The raging unicorn they kept locked up finally unleashed.
The lavender unicorn and The God-Emperor quickly became a ball of body-parts. Arms, buttocks and arms all tangled together. Twlight Sparkle didn't know what bit to focus on, so grabbed a spare baby-maker and dived in.
"More! More! More!" whispered Donald Trump to The lavender unicorn.
Their love making was like a sunrise of vaginas. Its like they were everywhere - inescapable (not that either of them wanted to escape them).
Things got...messy...from that point on.
Nearby the others occasionally heard various bodily function noises. But politely ignored it.
This had been coming far too long to ruin it now - and this team bonding was very much needed.
Twlight Sparkle and her team went carefully through Ponyville. The lavender unicorn looked very sexy, Her nipples perked, firm and erect. Her leather coat bilbogged in the breeze, extrapolating Her sex mess. “It is time”, She said, Her voice having a British nationality.
“Yes, It is time to defeat Discord once and for all.” said Sunburst . He wore a Black corset covered in Shafts and a nice hat. His nails were iridescent black and he had a ruby skull ring on.He looked as hot as a Hell!
And then they rushed into the base. Pinkie Pie roundhouse kicked a mook and then punched one with her glock. It exploded and she held up her middle finger to the explosion.Pinkie Pie then used her holy holy magics and summoned a giant bloody cross scythe that glowed black. She sliced everyone but it was okay because she dodged her friend. Blood spurted and went on everything, making a star of david one the walls. A rock bounced off the draconequus as he entered, LOOKING FUCKING PISSSSED.
“How dared you! I will kill u!!!!!!111!!!” he shoouted and took out a flame thrower (A/N geddit?)
The fight was epic. Things burned black. Donald Trump and The athletic pegasus got distracted and started kissing in the corner and doing Doddling but then one fell asleep.
Twlight Sparkle Ejaculated at the the chaotic draconequus, “LOOK BEHIND YOU!”
And then he looked and Twlight Sparkle knocked him out cold.
Nothing was darker than the butthole, the old sage had told Twlight Sparkle.
And he also told the lavender unicorn that virtue is the best property in a person. And that Twlight Sparkle could be the legendery Chosen One that the prophesies of old and dank and darkness had spoken about.
Oh yes, the Prophecy. That what had made the lavender unicorn lay awake at nights. Of course Rainbow Dash had asked what was up with the lavender unicorn.
"Of course," Twlight Sparkle would always say, "there is nothing going on, dear. Go back to sleep." And in their minds they'd fill in "You don't have to worry about the terrible burden I will have to carry for the rest of my life"
Because everyone knows, prophesies have a nasty way of coming true. And this one was about to come true spectacularly.
In the darkness of that night, away from the preying eyes and ears of those who would judge, some strangers slipped by unnoticed.
But they were not strangers, they knew each-other. And they knew each-other much closer then any of their friends did realize.
They knew each-other both inside and out. But their friends did not know this. Their friends could not know. Their friends should not know this.
Nor could they know. Because it was night, and thus away from their viscous, judging eyeballs.
"Is it safe?" said the first stranger, who was not a stranger to the other stranger but will remain a stranger to us for the moment.
"I think so. Its dark so none of the others should see us here, even if they are nearby. I think our secret is safe."
"Good. I couldn't take their judgement right now. My life is too stressful as it is. If it wasn't for you I don't know what Id do."
"Don't worry The lavender unicorn, I will always be here for you - waiting in the dark"
"Thanks, Donald Trump. I will always be in the dark for you too"
With that the two shadows embraced - an embracement in the night full of passion and romance.
And they journeyed long and far too reach their destined encounter with fate which was foresaw by a soothsayer with the ability to predict the future that hasn't happened yet!!....
.
"We must journey now to yonder to defeat thee the evil emperor of evil and to defeat thee and return spread our magic to this realm of Equestria!"
"Yes, Letus the final battle commencement start!"
For a moment time seemed to slowed down. Twlight Sparkle wondered why. The lavender unicorn turned around slowly (due to the time seeming to have slowed down).
Then the explanation - The God-Emperor was secretly looking at her. Looking at her in that special way.
Twlight Sparkles soul lit up like a beacon in the night - even though it was day.
In all of this. In all of this mess. They had eachother, even if eachother was the only ones that knew.
The God-Emperor turned away at that moment - Time jumped back to normal as The lavender unicorn was no longer transfixiated by The God-Emperor.
Fortunately no one else had noticed.
Some time later in their secret hide-away ;
"I am glade we found a way to survive all that and still be together"
"Yes, our plan seems to have worked despite all the events"
"Do you think anyone spotted us?"
"No"
"No"
"Yes"
Lucritia emerged from the shadows of the darkness.
"I know everything" she said.
Twlight Sparkle and The God-Emperor gasped. Their secret was finally revealed!
"I dont love The God-Emperor like you do" said Lucritia "but I have always lusted a bit after them. So you see if The God-Emperor spends the night with me - I will never tell anyone."
The lavender unicorn breathed a sigh of relief. That was, after all, a reasonable request. They agreed to the bargain.
"Phwee...thats something we can go along with" said The God-Emperor relieved.
Lucritia was happy, and Twlight Sparkle and The God-Emperor thus got to live happily ever after together. With no one but Lucritia and themselves ever knowing.
But they knew the battle was going to be fierce!
And when they saw the armies of the draconequus embazzling before them, they had to gather the courage to go forth.
"For God , the lavender unicorn yelled.
"For SCIENCE," Donald Trump said.
"For Loop!" the athletic pegasus ejeculated loudly.
And then they all attacked!
And it was a fine spectacle to behold (A/N Oooooh, they're doing such cool things! Like bam! And Zuuuf!! And Pow!)
And then, just when our heroes could not take it anymore, they defeated the draconequus!
The end