It's been a long time since that one prank war started your relationship with Pinkie Pie, when she asks for another, who are you to say no?
There is never a dull day dating Pinkie Pie. Ever since that prank war started your relationship with a bang, you two were quite a couple in Ponyville. You two always found a way to make each other smile no matter what.
Then, one day, Pinkie challenges you to another prank war, just like old times, she claims. Loser has to answer three questions truthfully in front of all of Ponyville. Not wanting to lose again, you accept her challenge, already planning on what to ask her...
It's been over five years since my first story, All's Fair in Love and Prank Wars was published. I believe I started writing it a little bit after Season 1 ended. Since then, I've made a few more second person stories before eventually moving onto fetish territory. Now that Season 6 is over, I wanted to take a little break from feet and tickling kinks and make a direct sequel to what started it all, and to compare how much I've improved over the years. I'd recommend reading or re-reading that story not only to just catch up on the story, but to make better comparisons to my writing. The prequel isn't needed to enjoy the story, but some things would make more sense in doing so.
“Hi, dearie! Looking for Pinkie Pie?” Mrs. Cake asked, greeting you as you walked into Sugarcube Corner.
You waved to her, “Nah, don’t worry, just dropping off something for her. I won’t take long.” You climbed the stairs, making her way to her room.
You knocked on the door, just in case she was there. Upon pushing your hoof against the door, it opened. You could have just left the package at the door, but curiosity and a lack of good manners or common sense urged you to walk in. You shrugged, dropping off the bag by the foot of her bed before turning to leave.
“Heehee…”
Your ears flicked, that was definitely Pinkie’s laughter. You looked around, but she was nowhere in sight.
“...Pinkie?” You said, looking around the room in suspicion.
“Heeheehee!”
You started to hone in on the source of her laughter. You began eyeing the closet, smirking as you regained your confidence. She probably wanted to jump out at you when you were leaving, but this time you had the upper hoof. Your adorable, bubbly attitude will be your downfall this time, Pinkie Pie!
You threw open the closet doors, and stared right down the barrel of one of Pinkie Pie’s party cannons, right next to the tape recorder playing her giggles.
Oh for f-
In a confetti-filled explosion, you were blown back with a powerful puff of air, landing on Pinkie Pie’s bed. As you tried to recover from the shock, a piece of paper fell down, landing on your face. You peeled off the paper, finding that it was a letter from Pinkie Pie. You began to read.
“Heehee! Hey, sweetie! If you’re reading this, looks like I gotcha! It’s been a long while since we’ve done one of these, huh? Why not do it again?”
Ignoring the possible concussion you might have received, you smiled. There were no boring days dating Pinkie Pie. Unfortunately, that meant very little calm days.
“We keep going until one of us gives up. It’ll be just like old times, right?”
You raised an eyebrow in confusion. Old times? It was like, a few years since this whole crazy thing really started, right? You did a couple of these things between then and now. Granted they were impromptu and didn’t go past a few days, but, it wasn’t that old…right?.
“This time though, the winner gets to ask the loser three questions, and the loser has to tell the truth to these questions...in front of ALL OF PONYVILLE! DUN DUN DUUUNNN…”
Oh my goodness she even wrote in her own sound effects. That’s adorable.
“I’ll give you until Friday to respond. Good luck, sweetie! Love you! -Pinkie Pie <3”
You put a hoof to your chin, not because you were considering whether or not to participate, but what kind of prank to do to get her back. First, you had to tidy up her room a bit, to make it look like you were never there.
A few days later, you began putting cupcakes on a tray in your kitchen, walking to the living room where Pinkie Pie is.
“Oooh, cupcakes! My favorite!” she said, hugging you tight while snatching the tray from you.
You chuckled, “Last week you said your favorite was doughnuts, and the week before that it was lollipops, and the week before that was-”
“Well now my favorite is cupcakes, so nyaaah!” she interrupted, sticking out her tongue at you.
“Heh, fair enough.”
“So, did you drop my stuff off in my room?” she asked, already stuffing her face with cupcakes.
“Mmhm, gave it to Mrs. Cake a few days ago,” You lied, watching her eat away.
“Oh...okay then...” she said, a twinge of disappointment in her voice.
“Why, did you need me to put it in your room myself?” You asked, trying to feign ignorance.
“Nah, it’s no big deal,” she shrugs, wiping the frosting off her mouth and licking it off her hooves, “Uh...you have more cupcakes, right?”
“Of course, I’ll get more,” you said, grabbing the tray and returning to the kitchen, as you’re refilling the tray...
BWOOOOOOOM!
“Waaaugh!”
You peeked your head around the corner, seeing your marefriend upside down, hair frazzled and on end, the seat of your chair removed, revealing the air horn you hidden underneath.
“How’s that for an response?” you said with a smirk.
It took a moment for Pinkie to get her bearings, she shook her head and started giggling. “Woaaaah...What a response!”
“Come here, my bouncy, bubblegum baby,” you grinned, picking her up, planting your lips on hers several times.
“So you did go into my room after all!”
“Yeah, it was great getting a point-blank blast from your party cannon,” you said sarcastically. The way she plans ahead sometimes is both interesting and frightening. “But I’d love to do another prank war! I was starting to miss times we’d try to one-up each other.”
“So, you know the rules, right? Prank only each other, nothing with permanent side effects, no f-”
“Yeah, yeah, no faking amnesia. I know the rules. I don’t know why you’re the one reminding me when you’re the one that did it to me in the first place.” you interrupted her.
“Alright, alright. Well, how about we officially start tomorrow?” she suggested, ”Until then we can spend the rest of the day in peace.”
You smiled, fixing the chair up for her, “Sounds good to me. I got more cupcakes for you.”
“Oooh, you’re the best!”
You went back into the kitchen, filled the tray with cupcakes, and brought it back. You set the tray down on the table and both of you sat down on the couch, each of you grabbing a cupcake.
“Aww, but I wanted the one with the yellow frosting!” she playfully whined.
“Then get one, there’s plenty of cupcakes with yellow frosting.”
“But I want that oooone!” she whined again, trying to give you a hint.
It took you a while, but it started to make sense. “Ohhh, alright, I’ll give you your cupcake,” you smiled, lifting the cupcake up, Pinkie doing the same. You both opened your mouths wide, slowly putting the cupcakes closer towards the other’s mouths.
At the same time, both of you raised your hooves and smushed the frosting against each other’s noses. You both blinked, realizing what just happened, before bursting out into laughter.
Eventually, the two of you calmed down, and pressed your frosting-covered noses together.
You decided to start pranking early, or rather, the middle of the night. Technically, it was tomorrow, so you could get the jump on her. You started by sneaking into Sugarcube Corner and into Pinkie Pie’s room, walking as slowly as possible to minimize noise. Opening the door was nerve-wracking enough with its creaking. In your inventory, markers to draw all over her face while she sleeps. A bit simple, but effective.
You grin, holding the marker in your hooves as you started to create your artistic masterpiece, making sure to not rouse her from her sleep. A handlebar moustache, some kitty whiskers on her cheeks, a monocle on her right eye, and just for fun, you signed your name on her forehead.
You began sneaking out of her room, as you opened the door, it let out a creak, prompting you to turn around to check if Pinkie Pie was asleep. You froze, eyes fixated on Pinkie. She seemed to remain asleep, happily snoring away. You saw something moving underneath her blanket, something vibrating violently for a brief moment. You recognized that motion, that was her Pinkie Sense going off. Something was about to fall. You stared at the ceiling; it was dark, but you didn’t see anything that could be falling. You looked back down to Pinkie, she seemed to stay asleep, only rolling over to the other side of the bed. You sighed in relief knowing you were almost in the clear, only to freeze back up as you turned back around, facing another party cannon.
With another pressurized party blast, you were sent flying again, landing right next to Pinkie Pie on her bed.
“Ooh, surprise sleepover?” Pinkie whispered in your ear, followed by a giggle.
“How?!” you shouted out.
“Shhh...you gotta be quiet, some ponies are trying to sleep,” She said, winking.
“...No, really, how?!” you said, volume unchanging.
Pinkie gave you a kiss on the nose. “That’s for me to know, and for you to find out later!”
“I am so getting you back after this,” You grumbled, blushing.
“I know you will, cutie. So, are you gonna sleep here tonight?” Pinkie said, fluttering her eyelashes.
“...Yeah, ok,” you sighed, reaching around and pulling her close to you. You’re already here, might as well take advantage of the current situation.
“Heehee, I love you!”
“I love you too.”
You ran your hoof down her back, feeling her breathing slow down as she went back to sleep. It felt so good to hold her in your arms; if you could, you’d spend every single night like this. You started to yawn, resting your chin against her mane, closing your eyes as your breathing synched up with Pinkie’s.
You’ll get her again later.
And later it was. This one was a bit costly, but it was totally worth it. You made your way to Sugarcube Corner with a heavy backpack in tow.
Pinkie Pie said that she would be away all day today doing something, which left you with plenty of opportunity to do the next prank.
Walking into Pinkie’s room, you closed the door behind you and set down your backpack, pulling out several tinfoil rolls.
Time to cover her room in tinfoil.
In a flash, you got to work, wrapping everything you could see with tinfoil. The pillows, the sheets, the rug, the phonograph, even the balloons and streamers strewn about were covered in the stuff. Now all that was left was the floor and the closet...where she kept her party cannons.
You took a deep breath, walking closer to the closet door. In one swift motion, you threw the door open and shuffled to the side, in case another party cannon was loaded at you. You looked in, all the party cannons were there and upright. Finally, a lucky break. You made quick work of Pinkie’s closet. Her party cannons, costumes, assorted hats, and even the containers of confetti she usually loads the cannons with had been replaced with containers of your own, full of shredded and ripped up foil. Another painstaking hour later, and the floor was foiled up, too.
You stood at the doorway and wiped the sweat off your brow to admire your hard work. It was like a cheap sci-fi future room. You gave a salute to the shining room before you shut it, leaving it waiting for Pinkie Pie to get a surprise.
After puffing out your chest in pride, you quickly collapse in exhaustion. You felt weak at the hooves, you didn’t even realized you spent pretty much the entire day doing this prank. It was already getting dark, but it would be totally worth it to get Pinkie’s reaction the next day.
You got into your home, yawning as you walked up the stairs to your room. You stretched out, yawning as you started to make your way home, you were so tired, you could probably jump on the bed and just lay there for the next two days and night. A nice long nap before your midnight snack sounded pretty good right now.
You opened the door, hearing a ripping sound as you did. You closed your eyes and braced for impact. Nothing happened. You opened your eyes, and realized what the sound came from.
Oh.
Your entire bedroom was covered in wrapping paper of all sorts. The bed, pillows, sheets, your mirror, even your action figures were individually wrapped with different designs of paper. The walls, ceiling, and floor were covered perfectly, with a special design for your windows. It was like a clown car exploded in your room.
“...Great.”
You started on your long process of unwrapping your own room. The amount of dedication and detail that Pinkie put into this was almost startling. Even things that dropped off a shelf or something before you left your room were wrapped up and placed in the exact same position. You began tossing the pieces of wrapping paper into a corner, watching the pile grow larger as you progressed.
On the plus side, at least you were prepared for birthdays and Hearth’s Warming for the next few years.
The posters that were usually put up on the walls were also wrapped up, and tied with a bow. Tearing off the paper revealed not the pictures of your favorite fictional heroes, but of your non-fictional marefriend, Pinkie Pie, apparently left as some sort of calling card. The same going for your family photos.
You know, in case you walked into your room, saw everything and was under the misconception that maybe Fluttershy was responsible for this.
By the time you got to look inside your closet, it was pretty much expected that everything in there was also wrapped up. Shirts, pants, shoes, hats, socks, everything. It was so much more thorough than what you did. The clothing hangers were thankfully wrapped along with the shirts they were holding. Just wanting to go to sleep at this point, you just ripped off a part of each so that you could see the design. When the time came that you were going to wear them, then you’d fully unwrap it.
You let out a sigh of defeat, shutting your closet to flop down on the bed and fall asleep, this was just something you would have to deal with later.
You woke up after a night of sleep, and groan as you remember what you spent last night doing. It’s almost noon and you already want to go back to sleep.
You rolled your neck, and went over to Sugarcube Corner to see Pinkie Pie at the counter, decorating a birthday cake. “Hi sweetie!” she waved, as energetic as ever.
You returned her greeting with a weak wave and smile, trying not to yawn.
She leaned against the counter, fluttering her eyes. “So, what’s new?” she asked, obviously wanting to know how her prank went.
“Well, lately, I was thinking of making some changes to my room, maybe something a little more colorful,” you joked.
“Whaaat? That’s crazy! Me too! A few days ago, I was thinking of making my room look more like a spaceship!”
The two of you started to laugh, before you laid your head on the counter. “I can’t believe we had the same idea! That’s like some spooky synchronization we have!” Pinkie Pie giggled.
“I spent almost all night trying to undo the damage, and I don’t even think I’m halfway done…” You mumbled, tilting your head to look at Pinkie. “By the way, where are my actual posters and pictures?”
“Right here!” Pinkie pulled out a box with your rolled up posters and pictures inside, placing it on the counter. “Wow, you’re really out of it, huh?” She said, poking your head.
“Mmmhmm...Do you have any like...coffee cake with extra coffee?”
“Well, no, not since last time, buuuut...I do have...this!” She says, grabbing you by the cheeks, picking up up, and planting a big kiss on your lips. “Does that work for you?”
Well, it certainly opened your eyes. “Mmm, I think it did, but could I have another just to be sure?”
“Well, if you insist!” Pinkie grinned, planting kisses on your cheeks and forehead. “If you want any more, they’re going to have to be after work.”
“Heh, I think that’ll be enough to get me through the day.”
“And you do remember our date tomorrow, right?”
“Mmhm, I’ll pick you up tomorrow. I love you!”
“Love you too!”
You walked back outside, feeling completely refreshed. You let out a sigh of happiness as you thought about taking her up on that offer. Still, Pinkie was probably planning another prank as she was working, so you might as well take that time to prepare as well. It was time to go to the castle...
“C’mon, Twilight! Just help me out on this!” you pleaded.
“I already told you, I’m not going to get involved in you and Pinkie’s prank war.”
“But it’ll be funny!”
“I don’t care!”
“Pleeeeeaaase?”
Twilight finally looks up from her book to glare at you. “I said no.”
“Please?”
“No.”
“Pretty please?”
“No!”
“Pretty pretty please?”
“No, and before you say ‘pretty pretty pretty please’, No!”
“C’mon, I really need you for this!”
“Why don’t you ask someone else to help? I’m sure Rainbow Dash would love to go prank PInkie Pie!”
“Because you have magic, duh!”
“Alright, I’ll bite: What exactly do you want me to do?”
You grin from cheek to cheek. “Ok, I want you to make clones of myself-”
“Absolutely not.”
“Oh come on, you didn’t even let me finish!”
“We have gone through two separate crises involving clones and lookalikes, and I refuse to go through a third!”
You’re about to respond back, but pause, dumbfounded by the new information. “Wait, really? Two? I thought you girls went through one.”
“Go ask Pinkie about the mirror pool incident, maybe then I can focus on this spell...”
You rub the back of your neck, feeling a bit foolish. “I uh...huh...Plan B then. I want you to make me look like a unicorn. I’ve also taken these pictures from Pinkie’s wallet, I’d like edited copies, you know? The plan is to make her think that I’ve always been a unicorn, and then later you can change me back.”
Twilight rubs her temples. “...And you need me why?”
“Because I’m going to have to use magic at one point, and I need you to help me fake it!”
“And what exactly are you going to make me do?”
“Nothing big, I swear! Just do basic things like picking an apple or flower, opening a door, following us around for like, an hour at most. That should be enough for me to prank her, and then that’s it!”
Twilight slams her book shut, snorting in annoyance as she looked at the pictures. “Fine, one hour. But you owe me big time.”
“WOOHOO!” Wow, that was a lot easier than you thought. This could be one of the best pranks you’ve ever pulled off if this works! You couldn’t wait to see the look on her face when she saw you with a unicorn horn.
After a bit of communication with an annoyed Twilight, you were almost ready. The pictures were changed and Pinkie’s wallet was put in its rightful place. The fake horn would be stuck pretty tight on your forehead, and would light up the same time Twilight would be using magic. Come tomorrow, you would be a unicorn.
For an hour.
The next day, you made your usual trip to Sugarcube Corner, a red rose tucked by your ear. You approached Twilight Sparkle, sitting outside. “Look, I just want to say thank you so much for helping me out on this.”
Twilight sighed, before letting out a small smile. “Yeah, well, just make this hour count.”
You nod, before walking inside. “Hey, Pinkie Pie! Are you ready?” you called upstairs, trying to hide your excitement. You took a brief look outside, seeing Twilight peeking in through the window.
“I’m reeaaadyyy!” She sang out, sliding down the banister, bouncing off at the end. Before she froze all her momentum in mid-air upon seeing you. Dropping down to the floor. “Woah woah woah, where’d you get that?”
You looked up at the rose, pretending not to know what she means. “Oh that? I was passing by Roseluck coming here and thought that it’d be a good gift. I know it’s a bit cliche, but, you know…”
“No, not that, that!” She said, pointing to your fake horn.
You almost cracked a smile as you looked up. “What? Something in my hair?” You ran a hoof through your mane, “C’mon, that prank’s too easy, Pinkie.”
“No, the horn!”
You tilted your head. “Yeah? What about my horn?”
“Where and when did you get that horn?”
“Well, when I was born, and from my grandmother on my mom’s side.”
“I...It’s just...” She stuttered, her eye twitching. “I don’t remember you having a horn!”
“Hey, I thought we said no faking amnesia.”
“It’s not amnesia!” Pinkie huffed, puffing her cheeks. She pursed her lip, staring into your eyes before her pupils widened. “Ohhh...I get it now! Heehee, that’s a good one! You really got me!” She laughed, flicking your horn.
“Ow! That hurt!” You cringe, stepping back as the horn wiggles, but stays on your head.
“C’mon, I know you’re an earth pony! I have proof right here!” Pinkie smirks, reaching into her wallet and showing off the pictures of you and her together.
You stare at the photos for a moment, secretly happy at the alterations made. “Uh...what am I supposed to be looking at?”
Pinkie Pie looked at the photos, squinting her eyes. “...Huh…”
“C’mon, we were gonna go to the park, remember?” You turned around, ready to walk out the door. Without warning, Pinkie Pie suddenly leaped onto your back, hooves swatting at your head. “What are you doing?!”
“Almost...got...your horn!” Pinkie Pie grunted as you tried to shake her off.
“Pinkie, what if someone see us like this? Get off!” You looked back at the window, seeing Twilight trying to hide her giggling. You gesture to Pinkie Pie, trying to signal her.
Twilight playfully rolls her eyes, lighting up her horn and ducking out of sight. Your own fake horn glowed too. An aura of energy surrounding Pinkie Pie, lifting her up, and putting her on the side.
“Uh…” Pinkie stared, flabbergasted. That was honestly a rare thing to see. “I...I guess it’s real...Ehehe, sorry!”
“It’s fine,” you chuckled, the rose moving from your ear to her’s. “Let’s just go to the park.” You wrapped your tail around Pinkie’s, Twilight’s magic opened the door for you two to walk outside and towards the park.
So far, everything seems to be going just right. Seems that you managed to get one step ahead of her this time. You might do a few more magic tricks, and you’d reveal the truth. For now, a regular date, with some magical help.
The two of you arrived at the park, tails still intertwined. You made your way under a shady tree and sat down. “So, what do you wanna do here?”
“Ooh, what about a picnic?” Without any warning, Pinkie reached off to the side and pulled out her tinfoil-covered party cannon out of nowhere, firing it in the air. What fell down was a red and white plaid blanket and a stuffed picnic basket.
You’ve seen her do things like that for so long, that at this point, you don’t even want to find out how or why out of fear that trying to comprehend her might make your head explode.
Pinkie opened up the basket, revealing your favorites, a dandelion sandwich with hay fries, and Pinkie Pie’s favorites, which was pretty much all just sugary sweets with frosting and sprinkles.
As Pinkie Pie started wolfing down her sweets, you start to reach for your food, before pausing. You couldn’t eat with your hooves, that would be too suspicious. It’s at that point you both came to a horrible realization: Twilight was going to have to feed you. From the corner of your eye, you spot Twilight, and briefly turn to face her, pointing your horn at your food.
Twilight rolled her eyes, getting to work. The sandwich lifted itself up due to her magic, you opened your mouth in preparation. Suddenly, the sandwich flew towards your mouth, catching you by surprise. Half the sandwich was in your mouth, almost choking you. Your eyes dart over to the side, thinking that Twilight’s trying to murder you.
Turns out that Twilight is not that trained in long-distance feeding.
The sandwich thankfully backs out to a reasonable bite-sized, portion, and you take a bite. You look back over to Pinkie Pie, who’s watching you eat, half a cake stuffed in her mouth.
After the picnic, you looked at Twilight in the distance, who was tapping her wrist with her hoof. Guess that meant your hour was almost up. Well, it was fun while it lasted.
“Hey, Pinkie Pie.”
Pinkie looks up, lips covered in frosting. “Mmph?”
“Wanna see a magic trick?”
“Mmhmm!”
“Alright, here goes!” You put your hooves on your fake horn, and started to pull, grunting as you eventually tore the horn off your head. “Tadaaaa!”
“Woah woah woah woah! Y-Your horn!” Pinkie gasps, trying to reattach your horn back to your head.
You chuckle, “Pinkie, Pinkie! It’s not real!” You motioned over to Twilight, who walked over and waved. “All that magic I did was just Twilight!”
“Whaaaaaat?”
“Heh, gotcha!”
Pinkie put her hooves to her cheeks, “I can’t even believe it! Twilight, you helped pulled a prank on me?”
“Don’t get any ideas, Pinkie,” Twilight said dryly, although you could tell she was smirking on the inside.
“Wow, you two really got me good!” She giggled, her laughter growing until she was rolling on the ground in hysterics. Wow, she was more amused at your prank than you were.
Well, the prank was over, but what about Twilight? It’d be awkward and a bit rude to ask her to join what was meant to be a date. “Uh...you want some hay fries and donuts?”
“Nah, I’ll just leave you two lovers alone,” she said, waving goodbye before trotting off.
Pinkie finally stopped laughing and rolled up next to you, laying her head on your lap. “Whew, how’d you manage to convince Twilight to do that for you?”
“Well...It took a lot of effort, I’ll tell you that much,” you reply. You weren’t wrong, desperate begging took a lot out of you.
Pinkie lightly jabbed you in the stomach. “You really had me going there! That was one of your best ones yet!”
“Well, I’m inspired by the best,” you smirked, rubbing her chest.
“Aww, stop it, you!” she blushed.
“You know I love you, right?”
Pinkie pie giggled. “You tell me almost every day, and every time you say it, I believe you!”
“Well, it true, and I just love saying it to you!” You look down into her eyes, “I love you, Pinkie Pie.”
“I love you too!”
The two of you stayed underneath that tree for a while, talking, laughing, kissing. Time seemed to fly by so fast that the two of you didn’t notice that the sun had already set. The two had finally said your goodbyes, going your separate ways. Day well spent, you went back home. Your room was still mostly wrapping paper, but you didn’t really mind. You rolled into bed, falling asleep with a content sigh.
Your peaceful slumber was disturbed by the sound of distant chatter and the sun hitting your face. You turned in your sleep to try to keep the light from shining on your eyes. As you rolled, your hoof hit something unfamiliar. It was soft, but it definitely wasn’t anything that should’ve been on your bed. You slowly opened your eyes.
Huh. This wasn’t your bedroom. You looked around, this room was really blue and bright, and this bed was really white and fluffy. Your eyes shot open as you jolted. You looked over the edge of the bed to see the ground ten feet away. Your heart dropped, and you prayed that the rest of your body wouldn’t follow.
You let out a scream that you weren’t even sure came from your own mouth, it was so high pitched.
You shuffled back to the center of the cloud, shaking. This had to be a dream right? You should not be able to be laying on this cloud so comfortably. You slapped yourself, and slapped yourself again. You were still on the cloud. So this was probably real.
“Heeey! What’s up?” You heard someone giggling. You looked down, a pink figure waving at you.
“Pinkie Pie, w-what’s going on?” You shouted, voice wavering.
“What? You just fell asleep on that cloud, that’s all! I think the weather ponies are gonna need that soon!”
You were 98% sure that was a lie, but that was not your primary concern at the moment. “Well, uh...c-can you get me down now?”
“Sure! Why don’t you just get down, then?”
“How am I supposed to get down? I don’t even know how I got up!”
“Aw, you can fly down.” A voice said from behind. You jolted, turning around to see Rainbow Dash lying down next to you. “Just use your wings!” she smirked.
“My wi-” You looked to your side. Sure enough there were wings attached, just made out of cardboard and stuck on with duct tape.
Ok, that was actually really funny.
“Oh. I-I get it.” You started to chuckle.
“Oh, and while you’re up here,” Rainbow Dash said, “Pinkie Pie just wanted to say: Gotcha!” Rainbow then burst into laughter.
“Seriously though, please get me down now. I don’t think my knees have stopped shaking ever since I woke up,” you say with sincerity.
“Oh! Yeah, gimme a moment,” Rainbow said, picking you up by your front hooves, gently lowering you back to the earth. You instantly collapse, wanting to be as close to the ground as possible.
“Morning, cutie!”
“What was that and how.”
“Well, since you thought it was a good prank to be a unicorn, I thought it was a good prank for you to be a pegasus!”
“Yeah, I get that, how did you get me up there while I was sleeping?”
“I can answer that,” Twilight said, looking down at you. “Soundproof bubble to move you out of your bed without waking you up, cloudwalking spell to put you on there, and just to be safe, an invisible barrier to make sure you didn’t roll off. Child’s play, really.”
“Seriously? You begrudgingly helped me yesterday, and you just went along with Pinkie’s plan the moment she asks?!”
“Well, it wasn’t the moment she asked...” she shrugged.
“It really did take a lot of desperate begging,” Pinkie interjects.
“But, she did make the good point that if I helped you out, I gotta be fair and help her out too.”
You lie down on the ground, half-laughing, half-crying.
“A-are you ok? Did it go too far?” Pinkie asks with genuine concern.
You look up at her and nod. “Yeah...I’m fine. Scared, but it was really funny. Whew...”
Given your current situation, you could get her back and continue the prank war, but with the idea you had, the consequence would be that no one in Ponyville would ever be able to enjoy the Running of the Leaves again, so you decide to choose the alternative.
“Pinkie? I give up. You win.”
“Hmmm?”
“I’m not going to be able to top this anytime soon without serious repercussions, so yeah, I’m tapping out now. You win, Pinkie Pie.”
“Yahoo!” Pinkie Pie cheered, picking you up and spinning you around. “C’mon, I’ll go get the rest of Ponyville!”
Right, the cost of losing. Truth or Dare in front of the whole town.
“Yeah...I’ll uh, join you later,” you say, lying back down on the ground, pressing your cheek against the dirt. It took a few minutes, but you finally got up, dusted yourself off, and went to find Pinkie Pie.
Soon, you, Pinkie, and Twilight stood there at Town Square, Twilight reading a book of spells. More and more ponies started to crowd around, some of them giggling. These ponies seemed way too interested in what Pinkie Pie was planning, which worried you.
Twilight closes the book, her horn lighting up. “Ok, I think I got the truth spell. If you say something that’s true, my horn will light up green. If not, it’ll be red.” She pointed at you. “Alright, did you parade around Ponyville in a dress because you lost a prank war with Pinkie Pie previously?” Twilight asked, inciting giggles from the audience.
You let out a groan, you were hoping that event was forgotten. Guess you were setting your hopes too high. “...Yes,” you grumbled.
Twilight’s horn flashed green for a few seconds. “It works!”
You grumbled. This was gonna be humiliating.
Pinkie Pie stood in front of you, Twilight in the middle like a referee. “First question! What happened on our very first official date?”
Why did she have to ask that question? Especially in front of the Cakes… You took a deep breath. Maybe you could lie so well, Twilight’s magic wouldn’t pick it up.
“Well, I picked you up, and we went to the movies, where we watched the latest superhero movie, and we went through three buckets of extra-extra-extra large popcorn before the movie even started.”
Twilight’s horn suddenly flashed red. Pinkie Pie shook her head, smirking. “Nuh-uh! That’s not what happened!”
You sighed, that’s what you wished happened that night. “Alright, fine. I went to pick you up to go to the movies, but tripped and fell into a giant cake, and then we had to spend all night remaking it from scratch to prevent the Cakes from finding out I ruined it.” You lowered your head in shame. While you still got to spend the night with Pinkie, who helped you every step of the way, it wasn’t exactly the way you wanted to spend it. The fact that you completely botched the first date and almost ruined the Cake’s reputation were supposed to be kept secret.
Twilight’s horn turned green again. “That’s more like it,” she smirked.
The audience started to laugh, you looked out and saw Mr. and Mrs. Cake looking at you in shock.
“I am...so sorry,” you said to them.
“Okie dokie, second question...” Pinkie cleared her throat, looking you in the eyes. “Do you love me?”
“Yes, of course I do, Pinkie,” You said, a bit confused at how simple the question was. You assumed that she was going to ask nothing but embarrassing questions to humiliate you further in front of the entire town.
Twilight’s horn glowed green, you heard the town give a collective “Awww…” in response.
Really? Most of these ponies were there for the anniversary parties she threw. It’s not a secret, you thought.
“Alright...for the last question…”
You tilted your head in confusion. All of a sudden, Pinkie became a lot less energetic, her voice had lost her pep, she was weak at the knees. Was it her Pinkie sense going off? Alright, let’s see...what was shaky knees alone? Was it a rainbow? Did she have floppy ears? Maybe it was incoming dessert...
Pinkie Pie reached behind her, pulling out a small black box. And suddenly, everything started to make sense as she opened it.
“Will you...marry me?”
At that moment, it was if nothing else existed. The audience was silent, the only thing your senses were picking up was Pinkie Pie presenting a ring to you.
There was nothing but silence throughout Ponyville, all of them waiting with bated breath for your response. You were finally the one to break the silence with a nervous chuckle.
“...Pinkie Pie. Every single day, even if I don’t see you, you somehow manage to make me smile. I’ve never met a pony that’s as upbeat, as energetic, as funny, as quirky, as talented, as wonderful as you are. It’s funny...I kinda always thought that I would be the one that would have to propose to you. I don’t know how much I can offer to you, but if you want me to make you as happy as you make me every day, I can definitely do that. So...Yes. A million, billion times yes I will marry you!”
“WOOOOOHOOO!” Pinkie cheered, leaping into the air, practically exploding in joy, landing in your hooves, peppering your face with kisses. The crowd roared with applause, throwing confetti and streamers in the air.
You freeze, “...This is a real proposal, right? Th-this isn’t like some super prank on me, right?”
Pinkie Pie giggled, pressing her hoof against your nose, “Of course it’s real, silly! Oooooh I can’t believe we’re gonna get married!”
“Oh thank goodness, I’m just making sure,” You looked over to Twilight, whose horn has been flashing green the entire time. “Ok, then, how long did you know about this? This entire prank war thing was just so she could propose to me, wasn’t it?”
“Well, a while back, we were all at Sugarcube Corner talking. At first she wanted you to propose…and was going to try to give you hints on what she wanted...” Twilight started, disabling the spell.
“...Buuuut, then she screamed out ‘Ooh, I got an idea!’ and then ran out without explaining anything,” Dash continued.
“We’re just as shocked as you were when she proposed,” Applejack shrugged.
“Not that we didn’t see this coming eventually. You two have been quite the item, after all,” Rarity chuckled.
“Congratulations, you two! You’re going to be so happy together!” Fluttershy grinned.
“Ooh!” Pinkie squealed, leaping off of you, bouncing with excitement, “I can’t wait to start planning this ceremony and reception and th-!”
“Woah woah woah woah!” Rainbow Dash interjected, stuffing her hoof into Pinkie’s mouth. “You aren’t gonna be planning your own wedding!”
“What? Well then, who else is?”
“We’ll find somepony good, don’t worry!”
“Alright! Now c’mere, you!” Before you knew it, Pinkie Pie tackled you to the ground, giving you even more kisses and hugs.
“Ack! P-Pinkie!” you gasp, giggling as you try to get up.
“Whaaat? I’m just getting practice for the big wedding kiss!” she grinned.
“Well, maybe I need to get some practice in, too!”
After the proposal, you two were told that all your friends would take care of everything, and you two could just focus on being in love. You and Pinkie finally got to meet the wedding planner, and in all honesty, Cheese Sandwich is probably the most appropriate pony they could’ve ever gotten. He walked through the ceremony, the reception, and the decoration, all in a song which you swore you heard the melody to before.
This was all quite convenient, usually weddings are planned extensively by the engaged couple, you thought that you would have to go to Mr. Igneous Rock Pie and ask for her daughter’s hoof in marriage and all that, but since Pinkie Pie proposed to you...
“...Pinkie, did you tell your family that you proposed?”
“...No?”
“And you didn’t tell my family either?”
“Not yet.” She said, slowly starting to grin.
“And that means…”
“Surprise trip to the rock farm!”
You let out a deep, long sigh as you stared at the ceiling of the train car, leg bouncing up and down out of anxiety. Your family was scattered all around Equestria, so mailing invitations would be faster. Pinkie’s family was in one place, so telling them personally would be easier. You rubbed the back of your neck, “Uh, Pinkie? It might be best if you do...all the talking for this.”
“Why?”
“Well, one, it’s your family. Two, it’s because your parents are very…” You paused, trying to find the right word. Ancient? Old-fashioned? “...traditional. And I’m going to take a wild guess and say that with Cheese Sandwich in charge of planning, this wedding is going to be anything but. And three, your family usually does something with a pairing stone, and maybe they wouldn’t approve of a proposal?”
“Well, what are you so worried about? You met my family before.”
“Yeah, but I don’t think they…hold the highest opinion of me.”
“Whaaaat? Nonsense! My parents and sisters love you!”
You pause, “...So when Limestone yells at me with a scowl on her face and fire in her eyes-”
“It means she cares about you, and me!”
That was certainly one way to look at it. You were just hoping that she wasn’t going to rip your head off.
The moment you came within proximity of the rock farm, Limestone charged in, butting her forehead against yours.
“You! What did you do to her this time?” She growled, gritting her teeth.
“Glad to see you too, Limestone,” you say, leaning back.
“Relax, Limey. I have something we gotta tell the whole family! C’mon!” Without warning, Pinkie grabbed the both of you and dragged you into the house, Limestone scowling at you the whole time.
Pinkie barges through the door, much to the surprise of the rest of the family. “Pinkie’s home!”
“Hello, Pinkie. I’m so glad you and your boyfriend made it all the way over here to visit us,” Maud said, as monotone as ever.
“Mmhmm,” Marble went.
“Pinkamena, what are you doing here? Is something wrong?” Cloudy Quartz walked into the room with her husband, Igneous.
“Well, no, but we got something to say to you all!” Pinkie said excitedly, gathering her family around the living room.
Pinkie started to tell the story about the prank war that just went on between you two. Even though she was mostly giving the bare minimum, you knew she had a tendency to ramble...
“...And so at the very end, I proposed, and now we’re getting married!” she said, pulling you close with a nervous smile.
The room suddenly fell silent, no one said anything for what felt like an eternity, until Igneous cleared his throat and called your name.
“I want to tell you something,” he says, standing up, walking towards you.
“Yes, sir?” You nearly squeak out, tensing up.
“You understand that we Pies usually are married through the Pairing Stone, right?”
“Y-Yes sir,” you nod, “If the Choosing Stone didn’t say that we should be toge-”
“But...we know how happy you make Pinkamena, and regardless of what the Pairing Stone says, we would be more than happy to consider you part of the family.”
“Oh, thank you so much, sir!” You sigh in relief, your muscles finally relaxing.
“Please, call me ‘Father’,” Igneous said.
“We’re so happy to have you as a brother-in-law.” Maud said, you swore you saw her smile for the first time.
“Mmhmm!”
“Y-Yeah...welcome to the family or whatever.”
“New family hug time!” Pinkie cheered, pulling you and the rest of the family close. You closed your eyes, relaxing in the loving embrace of your fiancee’s family, which you would soon be part of.
A couple of days later, you were back in Ponyville, getting measurements for your tuxedo. You waited in the main room while Rarity worked her magic upstairs. While you were waiting, the anxiety started to set in. If Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich were involved, then that means the wedding was going to be huge. If you screwed up, that would be a screw up no one would ever forget. Your train of thought was interrupted by the slamming open of the door.
“Alright, it’s ready! Here’s your wedding dress,” Rarity giggled, holding up a dress very similar to the one you paraded around in.
“Ha ha, very funny,” you responded dryly. “Please tell me that’s not what Pinkie’s going to wear.”
“Oh, heavens no!” Rarity scoffed, “You’ll see what she’ll wear at the wedding. But, here, try this on,” she held out a tuxedo in front of you.
You slip into it, rolling your shoulders and stretching your hooves to see how comfortable it was. “Feels good, Rarity!”
“And it looks good, too!” She beamed, bringing a mirror in front of you so you could see how dapper you looked.
You started posing, examining yourself from all angles.
Rarity popped up from behind you. “Are you nervous, darling? It’s getting closer to your big day, you know.”
You let out a sigh, “Yeah, I think I’m getting more nervous every day, but...I’ve never been happier, you know?”
“Well, don’t worry about it. We’re handling everything so that you and Pinkie don’t have to.”
You smile. “Thanks, Rarity, we’re so lucky to have good friends like you.”
The days passed by quicker than you expected, your family finally came to visit you, you and Pinkie sorted out the bridesmaids and groomstallions, the flower girls and ring bearer. Soon, it was finally the big day.
You stood at the altar outside, waiting for what felt like an eternity, right on the verge of hyperventilating. You looked at the massive audience that attended.
There’s all of Ponyville, friends, your family, siblings and their dates, so there’s that. You recognized those three as Princess Cadance, Prince Shining Armor and their kid Flurry Heart. Cadance seemed to be comforting her crying child.
...and her crying husband.
While scanning the rest of the crowd, you did a double take. Is that...Princess Celestia and Princess Luna? There were so many ponies, even zebras, yaks, and griffons. So many faces you didn’t recognize, did Pinkie Pie know all of them?
You looked over at Cheese Sandwich, gesturing to the wedding guests, “...Did Pinkie Pie invite every single being in Equestria?”
Cheese gave a you playful little shrug.
Great, that’s more people you could be screwing up in front of.
Before you asked for a paper bag to breathe in, the music kicked up again. You didn’t really think about what your wedding would be like, even when dating Pinkie, but you kinda expected the music to be graceful, from an organ or a piano. An accordion was pretty unexpected, yet oddly fitting. You turned to see your wife-to-be walking down the aisle towards you, dressed in an elegant white dress with a golden lace, escorted by her father.
It was like falling in love with her all over again.
She made her way in front of you, and you lifted off the veil in front of her face.
And it took every bit of willpower in you to not burst out laughing.
Underneath the veil, Pinkie had put on her hypno-glasses, clown nose, and fake mustache. You immediately grin, looking away from her, shaking as you try keep the laughter in. She turned to the attendees, who erupted into laughter. After the laughter died down, you composed yourself, removing her gag-accessories. Seeing her look so ridiculous actually helped calm your nerves.
Mayor Mare finally began the speech. “Dearly beloved, we are here to join these two in mare-trimony. These two ponies are quite notorious for their pranking sprees, we’re lucky that they’ve been so busy pranking each other, and not the entirety of Ponyville!”
As the crowd laughed, you looked over to Pinkie with a smirk. Now there’s an idea...
“But, despite everything that happens in their lives, they truly love each other. They’ve been together for better, worse, or publicly embarrassing. Now, I believe the bride and groom have some words they’d like to say to each other.”
You clear your throat, “Pinkie Pie, you’ve done so much for me. Whenever I’m sad or stressed, you find a way to make me happy again, you make me feel like I don’t have a care in the world when I’m with you. You’re wonderful, upbeat, beautiful, confusing, and wild, and I wouldn’t have you any other way.”
“I’ve never met a pony that cares about me the way you do. While I try to make everypony smile, you’re there near me every day to make me happy. I see how hard-working you are, whether it’s to get me with a prank, or to make me smile. And I want to stay with you five-ever,” Pinkie said to you, grinning from ear to ear.
You let out a small chuckle, five-ever is one longer than for-ever.
Rainbow Dash flew up to the altar, giving you two the rings. You slip them on each other’s hooves.
Mayor Mare turned to you, “Do you take this mare to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
“I do…” You say, starting to tear up.
“Do you take this stallion to be your lawfully wedded husband?”
“I do!” Pinkie practically screamed out, bouncing with excitement.
“Then, I am happy to say that I now pronounce you husband and wife! You may now kiss!”
Finally, the big moment, you leap into Pinkie’s hooves, tilting your head to lock lips. The two of you held that position for what felt like forever. The crowd was cheering, the music was playing, you were fairly certain that Cheese was making something explode, but you didn’t care about all that right now. You were finally married to the pony who you loved and loved you back. Pinkie Pie was now your wife.
After your first married kiss, you looked over to the side and started to crack up, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Spike were holding up signs scoring the kiss.
Really, Rainbow Dash? 7.5?
“Well, now that all that’s over with, let’s get this party started!” Cheese Sandwich cheered, grabbing ten party cannons at once and firing them all off. By the time the smoke cleared, the venue was completely transformed.
It was pretty convenient that the ceremony and reception were at the exact same place.
Pinkie Pie squealed, and, still carrying you, made a dash to the newly-made dance floor. You danced, and danced, and danced until your hooves were sore, and then danced some more.
Just when you thought your hooves were gonna fall off, Pinkie thought it would be a good idea to do the bouquet toss.
As you looked at the eager single mares, you had a feeling something was about to happen. You just didn’t know what.
You turned to Pinkie Pie. “Alright, toss it!”
With a grunt of effort, Pinkie threw the bouquet behind her.
“MIIIIIINE!”
Without even looking, you already knew who shoved at least ten other mares aside to grab it.
The party continued, with no sign of slowing down. Exhausted, You sat down at a table, chugging down cider. Pinkie Pie walked up to you, leaning on the table.
“Hey, done already? The night is still young!”
“Nah, just taking a break. I can only take so much excitement, you know?”
“Heehee, I get ya. How about we go somewhere quiet to relax, hm?”
“Aw, it won’t be long! I’ll get Cheese and Dashie to cover for us.”
The two of you snuck away, just for a little while, sitting underneath a tree. Pinkie leaned over, placing her head on your lap. You let out a sigh, leaning back. Ever since you met Pinkie Pie, it had been a heart-pounding, mischievous, exciting trip, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. To think both major events in your relationship started with a few playful pranks. It seemed like prank wars always lead to a relationship milestone for you two.
You ran your hoof through her bouncy mane, freezing mid-stroke as you had a terrible realization.
“...Pinkie Pie?”
“Yeah?”
“Can you...Pinkie Promise me something?”
“Sure thing, what is it?”
You look down at your wife. “If, one day, you find out that I got you pregnant, and you want me to know...”
