> Lacrimis Solis Dea
>  by NovusStar123
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> "Who was he, Captain?"
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The vast blue expanse of the the summer sky slowly began to melt into the rich colours of twilight. Celestia stood high and proud on the designated balcony where she usually raised and lowered the fiery orb that was Equestria's sun. As her burning charge finally sank below the western hills, Celestia sighed. Her magnificent white wings were folded and drawn in close to her body, and the golden sun emblazoned on her flank looked slightly dimmer than usual, but that could have been due to the twilit evening. Or it could have been due to the pain the the sun goddess now bore within her heart. Eyes half closed, Celestia raised her head to the evening sky and sighed again as the warm breeze caressed her cheek. Her beautiful aurora mane flowed with the wind, giving the monarch a proud, regal pose on the high balcony. 
Despite being the sun goddess, it was this time of sunset that Celestia enjoyed the most. It was harmony, perfect balance and equilibrium between the day and night. It was a time when she and her sister Luna were true equals, and it was that which Celestia found most comforting. The moon slowly began to creep above the mountains of Canterlot behind her, bathing the sparkling city in a silvery glow. Her sister would arrive soon the take her duties from the same balcony, so with a final gaze at the perfect twilight before her, Celestia slowly trudged back into the Tower of Harmony.

The sun goddess walked alone through the high vaulted halls of the Palace, paying no attention to the elegant stained glass windows that lined the corridors, Celestia walked wearily to her private sanctum at the summit of the Solaris Spire. The aching in her chest was finally taking its toll on her, and she needed to rest before the dawn came. 

She arrived at the gilded oaken doors to her chambers sooner than she wished, and considered going back out into the night air, but thought better of it. With some effort, Celestia pushed the doors open and plodded over to the sumptuous circular bed at the far end of the room. But before she took more than three steps, the sun goddess collasped in a fit of tears. Crystal clear trickles of water fell from her anguished eyes, and how she wailed. All of the sadness stored within her now flowed freely, like a river of broken sorrow. Celestia made no effort to compose herself - this was her personal sanctum, her retreat from the world. She needed to impress no one here. Sobs and moans of pain were all that escaped the white alicorn for over half an hour. She buried her delicate face into the white rug that she lay sprawled upon before removing her golden crown with a toss of the head. She quickly reached up to her chest, where a strong hoof tugged off the golden nacklace that she always wore. The shoes with she wore were also hurled away. And still, the princess wailed. 

It was a long while before someone heard the sobs coming from the royal chambers, and Luna's night was well into its duration by the time a strong white coated unicorn heard the noises coming from his monarch's bedroom. Dressed in his full guard regalia, Shining Armour removed his helmet, letting his mane of many shades of blue fall around his face. Tentatively, he raised a hoof to the gilded doors.
"Uh, my Princess, is everything alright? Do you need any assistance?" called the guard captain nervously. He heard the sobbing stop from within the royal chambers. The silence was followed by the reply of his monarch. 
"Um, n-no dear captain, I am merely...stressed due to recent events". Despite the words of Celestia, Shining pushed on the doors and stepped into the bed chamber. Princess Celestia was sitting amongst the plush cushions and silken sheets of her bed. Her crown and other regal attire lay scattered across the room, and Shining had to avoid stepping on the golden gemmed necklace that his Princess usually wore. "I have no need for assistance captain, I'm fine", she managed a strained smile, "I am need of rest, nothing more. There is no need for concern". Shining set his helmet down on an elegant table by the side of the bed.
"With all due respect Princess, I think you're lying. Is it because of the attempt last week? We have guards posted at every entrace to the city and Palace. Your royal sister has also given us a battalion of her own soldiers. You have nothing to worry about, your highness. We have everything under control n-"
"Who was he, captain?" Celestia interrupted.
Shining blinked. "Who Princess, the assassin? As far as we know he was just a random Cha-"
"No...the guard. Who was the one who gave his life for mine? I have always prided myself on the knowledge of each and every one of my subjects, but I didn't know this stallion. What was his name?" Celestia had tears pooling in her eyes, and the captain could tell by the red marks on her cheeks that this would be the latest in what had already been a flood of tears. The captain took a deep breath. "His name was Star Soarer, your grace. He was one of the most promising cadets in the Academy of War. I remember him very well. He was very eager to please as I recall". That seemed to make Celestia shrink. Her mane of aurora light flowed slower than it did before, and her wings drew in closer to her body. 
"Tell me more about him, captain. Did you know him well?"
"As a matter of fact, I did princess. Um, well, he said he grew up in the hills around Stalliongrad. He had a brother and a sister. And...he said that he always wanted to see Canterlot one day, but joining the Royal Guard wasn't planned. Um, should I continue, princess?"
The white alicorn looked at him intently. "Please do, I need to know who it was who sacrificed himself for...me" she almost spat the last word. She levitated a plump cushion towards the captain, inviting him to sit down. Shining placed his haunches down and sat facing his Princess. "Well, he was put forward into joining the Guard by his father, an overbearing stallion apperantly. He expected much from him, and thought that the Royal Guard would put discipline into him. But after two days of, how he put it, 'complete and utter agony and pointless unneeded drills', he said he had grown to like the other ponies around him. He made a friend of me in his first week. 
The princess nodded slowly, taking in all that was said. A keening cry signalled the return of Philomena, the Princess' regal and majestic pet phoenix. The firebird landed gracefully on her perch and tilted her head as she regarded Celestia. The phoenix let out a mournful cry and bowed her head. Celestia smiled briefly.
"Thank you my friend, but there is nothing you can do for me. Or for the guard, Star Soarer as i know know he was called".
The phoenix gave a low chirp before fluttering away to roost in a lofty corner of the room. "How old was he Shining?"
The blue maned unicorn was surprised that the Princess had used his first name, but told her nonetheless. 
"Nineteen, your grace".
Celestia closed her deep violet eyes and inhaled sharply. Nineteen? He was that young? At the prime of his life, and felled before he could live to his full joy. The thought saddened and angered her. It was her fault he was dead. Her fault. 

Shining could see his princess battle the raging thoughts in her mind. He felt so sorry for her, his charge and queen, but there was nothing he could do for her. She suddenly opened her arresting eyes and refocused on the captain.
"Um, princess? Are you sure you should be talking to me, I mean, wouldn't your sister be better to confide in? Its not that I don't want to he-"
"I understand captain, and I'm sorry for making you feel uncomfortable. But Luna would never understand fully, and you knew him best. it is that fact which I take comfort in". Her horn suddenly flared a lime green light. A decanter bearing deep golden liquid floated towards the pair, followed by two tall glasses. One hovered over to Shining and landed on the table where his helmet rested. Celestia poured her own glass before sending the bottle towards Shining. He was about to refuse, when he thought better of rejecting the princess and allowed the dreamwine to be poured. He could smell the fruity aroma as the decanter tipped gently over his glass, filling it with the liquid gold. Shining took a sip and let the honey enriched wine dance across his tastebuds. He relished the fruity aftertaste was it went down his throat. celestia took a long swig as well, before setting her glass on another table. 
"What else can you tell me Shining, what was his cutie mark?"
The captain suddenly felt uncomfortable. why was Celestia so keen to learn about this unfortunate guard? Not that he wasn't upset himself - Star Soarer had been a friend to him, however brief. But he had learned to steel himself against such losses when he became captain, and surely the princess must have done the same during her immortal life. He hesitated before answering. "...um, it was a silver star with blue wings, your grace". Celestia nodded before closing her eyes again. She did not open them for a while.
"Um, princess...?" came Shining's nervous voice. Celestia blinked and shook her head.
"I'm sorry captain, I'm just a little distracted at the moment. What else can you tell me, did he have any interests that you knew about?"
"Well, he was a huge fan of the Wonderbolts, being a pegasus himself, and he was always one of fastest on the running track", Shining took another sip of dreamwine before chuckling lightly, "and he was very fond of 'marehunting' as he called it. Never had much luck apparently". Celestia gave a small smile. With it her whole form seemed to become lighter. Her mane flowed quicker now, and her proud chest fuller. Generally, her whole body just seemed a little brighter. The smile was then followed by a small laugh. Shining smiled too, to see his princess happy again, even if it was a small happiness. 
"Did he ever have a marefriend, or anyone he loved?"
"He never said a name, but he hinted very strongly at one when on the running track one day. Star Soarer always liked to keep us guessing"
Celestia's smile faded slightly. "I wonder what her name is, where she is and where she comes from. I wonder how she is feeling right now..."
Shining finished his glass before turning to his monarch. "Princess, you musn't do this to yourself. Punishing your heart over and over again will not bring him back. You need to let go, and re-"
"HOW CAN I LET GO?!" Celestia suddenly burst. Shining shot his head back when she lashed out. "HOW CAN I FORGIVE MYSELF? BECAUSE OF ME HE IS DEAD...DE-...", the sun goddess collasped on her bed as a new tide of tears washed over her. Shining leapt onto the four pillared bed and held his queen's head against his armoured chest. It was against every code about touching the princess' person without her permission, but celestia didn't pull away. She placed a forehoof onto Shining's strong forelegs and wept into the violet and gold armour. 
"Its not your fault princess, it was no one's fault. He died to protect the princess he loved, and there is no greater honour in the line of duty". The sun goddess pulled her head closer into his breastplate. Shining untid the clasps holding it in place with his horn so the princess could lean against his softer coat. 
"I can't do this anymore, captain...I j-just c-can't do it anymore" Celestia muttered as tears fell from her eyes in waves.
"Do what princess?"
"Rule...I can't rule this land anymore, I just can't DO IT! I've seen ponies from dozens of generations die while me and Luna live on to eternity. I cannot continue my reign if thousands of ponies continue to die for me and my sister. Its not fair..."
Shining quickly took hold of Celestia's face with both forehoofs and locked gazes with her.
"Listen to me my princess. YOU ARE NOT to blame for what the Changeling did to Star Soarer. YOU ARE NOT to blame for the suffering of this land. Under the reign of you and your royal sister, Equestria has become a beacon of light and hope to the world. How is that a bad thing? Ponies die, yes. We all must die one day princess, and Star Soarer chose his moment to lay down his life for yours, because he saw you as the living hope of Equestria. YOU ARE NOT to blame"
Shining suddenly felt dizzy, he must have had more dreamwine then he should of - it was strong stuff. Celestia's face suddenly looked dazzlingly beautiful. Her moist eyes looked like they her gilded with stars, and her aurora mane flowed more freely without her crown resting on it. Without thinking, Shining leant forward...and gently placed his lips to those of the sun goddess. Celestia moved back, but the dreamwine must have had the same effect on her, and soon she returned the kiss. Sanity suddenly reasserted itself on both ponies and they pulled away from eachother sharply. Philomena let out a high pitched squwark of alarm. 
"Oh..Oh my...princess forgive me" Shining stammered as he leapt off the bed and hastily began to put his armour back on. "I didn't mean- I'm so sorry princess, I shouldn't have done that, I-"
"No...you shouldn't have..." came a pained, feminine voice from the gilded doors. The doors were opened very slightly. Standing in the gap was a tall, beautiful alicorn with a mane of gold, magenta and violet. Her stunning rose coloured eyes were dripping with tears, and her purple tipped wings held close to her body.
"...Cadence..."
The pink alicorn turned with a sorrowful cry and ran back down the hallway.
"Wait! Cadence, I can explain! Cadence!" Shining Armour bolted down the hall after her, leaving his helmet behind. Celestia was openly crying again, sobbing uncontrollably. Not only had she let the loss of Star Soarer consume her, but in her grief she had dealt her own niece a blow that would probably never heal. Philomena swooped down from the ceiling and nuzzled her head against the sun goddess' chin. 
What have I DONE...?



To Be Continued...feedback greatly appreciated      
          
> Love
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cadence felt the two halves of her heart fall with agonising pain to the bottom of her soul. She saw what she saw, her heart and love Shining Armour...KISSING her aunt. She desperately  wanted to wake up now, to wake in her own bed with her loving husband lying next to her. But this was no dream, she painfully realised. That was her husband in that room with her aunt.
"...Cadence...Cadence wait!"

She heard him call her from further down the marble and gold hallway. He was a strong stallion and would soon catch up with her, so she unfurled her beautiful magenta wings and pushed back with the last of her strength. The power of the flap caused her to leap several more yards ahead, giving her more time to think of what to do. Tears fell uncontrollably from her startling pink eyes, leaving a trail of scattered sorrow behind her. But one fact pained her more than anything. Not only had she been betrayed by those closest to her, by her own family, but...
'I was going to tell him, tonight when he got back...I was going to tell him...'

The thought of the broken dream made her absently touch her stomach, and a fresh wave of tears overcame her. Her legs buckled beneath her as she became distracted. She crashed onto the rich embroided carpet lay ran the length of the hallway. And there she lay, not trying to pick herself up again. The fall brought her hoof again to her stomach, where she desperatly panted and wept at the same time. 
"Please, please...no, n-no, not this, not now...please...Celestia please, no!" she wailed...as a thin trickle of blood snaked its way from between her lower lips. Cadence ran a hoof across the trail of blood, staining the golden carpet a deep shade of maroon. She scrambled frantically with her hooves against the blood and her stomach. "Please, oh please...Goddess, n-n-NO!" she screamed as an incredible fiery pain stabbed itself into her lower regions. She had never known such pain to exist in the world, and the agony almost made her pass out.

The sound of her pain and the sight of her fall brought Shining Armour to her side quicker then she thought. The stallion cradled her shaking body with his forehooves, not so unlike the manner which he did with her aunt. But through all the sorrow and anger she felt for him, his voice still brought her comfort, especially now.
"Cadence...my love are you hu-", he stopped when his eyes found the red serpent flowing from between her legs. "Sweet Goddess no, it can't b- why didn't you tell me?" He hugged her close, and thankfully she did not pull away. 
"I was...after your rounds, but...", all her anger and pain came flowing back in a heartbeat, "you were with her...in the bedroom..." Cadence's glare could have shattered glass. "You were with Celestia...why? How could y-ARRRGH" she keeled over in pain again, clutching her torso, her tears mingling with the bloodstained carpet. Her screams were so loud that they began to hurt Shining's hearing. Two guard ponies came runing ove, greeted by the sight of a bloody princess and her husband. Shining looked up at the two guards, both of which had looks of confusion and shock plastered on their faces.
"What  are you waiting for? GET A DOCTOR NOW!" he bellowed. Both guards ran off with "yes sirs", and Shining tried his best to think of some way to explain to Cadence.
"It wasn't what you think, I only came in there to see that she was well. I heard her crying and I thought she was hurt. I would never do this to you my love. You have to believe me when I say that we can overcome this. It was a moment of madness that should never of happened. I swear on my life- on Twilight's...that I never meant to hurt you". He pressed his forehead to hers, their horns sparking slightly as they brushed each other. Cadence opened her eyes, those wonderful, wonderful eyes. Her voice was barely a whisper.
"I loved you..."

Shining felt his heart crack. She said 'loved' not 'love'. His entire world came crashing down around him. Did she she really mean it? She didn't love him anymore? Shining's eyes began to tear up. He cursed himself for doing so; he hadn't cried in years at anything, no hurt or injury could make him do so. But Cadence's words struck like a well honed dagger in his heart. He released his wife from his embrace and fell on his haunches, sobbing silently. he had lost everything that he held most dear in a single night. 

The two guards returned with a team of medical ponies, all unicorns. two hauled Cadence's now scarlet body onto a strecher whilst the other three began to probe her with medical instruments. Both Shining and Cadence both knew that no amount of magic or medicine could heal the wound that now pulsated in both their hearts. As for Cadence herself, Shining couldn't believe what had happened to her. Not only had he lost the one he loved most in all the world, but...but...
"I was going to be a father..?" he said thinking aloud. The thought humbled him, and hurt him more than he ever thought anything could. What if she loses the foal..? It was the only thing that he could think about for the next hour. Shining prayed for her forgiveness, and that their child would be unharmed. But the fall had struck Cadence hard, and the amount of blood was unnatural. 
'And its all MY fault...' he though sadly as he began to follow the team of frantic doctors towards the Canterlot Hospital.


Celestia walked wearily towards the wide marble balcony at the end of her large bed chamber. Her regalia was still scattered across the room on top of the luxurious rugs and carpets that lay on the marble floor. Using her magic, she picked up the tall decanter of dreamwine and hurled it into the fiery hearth to her right. The flames erupted violently before dying back down to their previous state. The sun goddess paced into the cool night air as she stepped onto the semi circular balcony. The night sky was beautiful as always, Luna's constellations shining like crushed diamonds on a field of dark blue velvet. Her glorious silver moon was only a crescent this evening, but still bathed its magical radience of twilight's silver shade on all of Equestria as brightly as it would have done if it were full. Celestia sighed and wiped the last of her tears from her rose coloured eyes with a forehoof. Though Luna's night was wonderful to behold, it had been one of the worst in Celestia's entire life. Due to an insane moment of drunken foolishness, she had singlehoofedly destroyed her niece's heart. And all this was caused the loss of some pony she only found out the name of that very evening. Why was it all a mess?

Celestia meant what she had said to shining Armour. She wasn't sure if she could continue to preside over all of ponykind for much longer. Philomena flew overhead of her and perched herself on the intricately crafted golden balustrade that wrapped around the balcony. The sun goddess leant against the edge and peered sadly at the land which she and her sister forged. To the south, Celestia spied the tiny lights of Ponyville. She wondered what Twilight was doing right know, if she was sleeping or doing some late night studying. Or maybe, doing something completely new and exciting. Celestia hoped it was the last thought, and let a small smile surface when thinking about her favoured pupil. 
'What would Twilight say to Shining Armour if she knew what had transpired this evening?', the white alicorn thought to herself, 'would she know what to do?' 
The thought of the two hearts that Celestia had just ripped apart gradually made her eyes water again. She had probably wept enough tears to supply Cloudsdale with water twenty times over that night alone, and she restrained her tears. But her heart wept more then anypony ever come in an entire lifetime. She had betrayed her only niece, and there was nothing Celestia found more hurtful in all the world. The thought of broken love also brought her thoughts back to Star Soarer. If he did indeed have a marefirend, what did she think of the princess, the one who basically sentenced Star Soarer to death. Resentment? Hatred? Sorrow? Or worst of all, Celestia thought...pity.  The painful separating of two hearts is something that Celestia had bitter experience with herself.

The memories of a time long forgotten by any living pony save herself and Luna came flooding back to her. A time when she said to somepony, not a relative, those three most beautiful and painful words in existence.
I love you...


******************************

"Come on Tia, just try it. Its really good, honest"
Celestia looked at her coltfriend, a powerfully built unicorn stallion by the name of Dawn Fire, with trepidation. Before her was something that he had made, and I didn't look very edible. He called it a cake...and Celestia had never seen such a thing in her life. It was spongy, and crumbled like crystallised sugar, but it was covered in a layer of white. A single cherry was lodged on the top of the triangular slice. The young alicorn sniffed it and pulled away.
"I don't know, it looks kind of strange...what is the white stuff on it anyway? It smells sweet and kind of sticky"
"Icing" came the cool response. Celestia looked at Dawn Fire with loving eyes. His coat was of a pale light blue, paler than the sky, crowned by a mane of deep navy streaked with gold. His head was crested by his magnificent horn. His hooves were almost twice the size of Tia's, and emblazoned upon his flank was a sun set alight with silver flames. His eyes were of an alluring indigo, a sight which made the young white alicorn's heart melt with happiness. 
With a cautious bite, Celestia sank her teeth into the soft triangle. Her eyes lit up with delight as she swallowed the divinely delicious bite of cake. She immediately took another, then another, and anoth-
"Whoa! Take it you like it then?" Dawn Fire asked with a chuckle. Celestia raised her head, tossing her long mane of pink and green - only - out off her eyeline. She smiled timidly. "Its the sweetest thing I've ever tasted" she replied in awe. Dawn Fire raised an eyebrow and smiled.
"Oh really, THE sweetest thing?" he asked, chuckling lightly. Celestia blushed before moving her lips against those of her coltfriend.
"Almost..." she said in a whisper...

********************************


The sound of flapping brought Celestia back to the present. She turned her teary gaze upwards. A beautiful winged figure landed before her on the balcony. Her coat was of a dark night sky blue, bearing an impressive cutie mark of a moon against a black sky on her flank. She stood almost as tall as Celestia, but not quite. Her vast wings folded to her sides as she tossed her wondrous mane of pure billowing night behind her. 
"Good evening Luna, its good to see you at thi-"
"We must not linger my sister", came the rushed response from the alicorn of the night, "Princess Cadence has been taken to Canterlot Hospital. Her husband is already there. We must take flight immediately to safeguard her. The night will have to last a little longer this day my sister" Luna flapped twice before launching into the night sky.
Celestia couldn't comprehend what just happened. Cadence, in hospital? Why? What had happened? The sun goddess quickly composed herself and retrieved her scattered regalia. As she thought of possible reasons as to why her niece was in hospital, a sudden realisation sparked in her mind.
"Oh no..."
When Cadence entered the room, Celestia felt the presence of two lives where she had been standing. One was of Cadence herself, but the other Celestia barely noticed, too caught up in the shock of being discovered to give it any notice. She had later thought it was just her imagination, but now...
"A foal..." she said to herself in horror. Cadence was pregnant. 
Steeling herself as best she could, Celestia sprinted back to the balcony where she spread her glorious white wings. She flapped twice before rising in an elegant arc over the edge of the balcony. The moonlight rippled against her angel wings beautifully, making the white feathers shimmer with a fantstical silver light. Philomena gave a squwark of alarm before spreading her own golden and scarlet wings and joining her mistress in the air. The phoenix left a trail of blazing orange light in a her wake.
And with all the speed they could muster, the alicorn and the phoenix flew towards Canterlot Hospital...




To Be Continued....feedback greatly appreciated :) 
    


> Grief
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Luna banked hard as she approached the large building that was the Hospital. All the lights were on in the structure, and Luna thought to herself which one Cadence would be in. She quickly looked behind her to see any sign of Celestia, and breathed a sigh of relief as she spied the large winged form of her sister, closely followed by a fiery bird that could only be Philomena. As she descended, Luna could see groups of ponies muttering and raising hooves at her and her sister's passing. The sight made her smirk. Unlike her sister, Luna relished in the ruling powers she had. Landing gracefully at the hospital doors, Luna quickly cleared a path for her and her sister. The night goddess strided towards the reception desk with regal pride.
"WHERE SHALL WE FIND THE PRINCESS OF LOVE AND BEAUTY, LOWLY DESK KEEPER?!" Luna boomed in the Royal Canterlot Voice, a tool which was still extremely useful despite what Twilight Sparkle had said. The terrified mare trembled  before answering.
"S-s-she's in Ward Seven - m-Maternity Unit...that way", she raised a quivering hoof down a corridor to her left. Celestia strode past Luna and proceeded down the passage, ignoring the gasps and mutters of the ponies around her. Luna frowned, clearly her sister new something she didn't, and...Maternity Unit? Luna sighed as she realsied what this meant. Cadence's foal could be in danger. The dark alicorn caught up with her sister.
"What do you know of this?" Luna asked bluntly. Celestia sighed and closed her eyes before answering, Philomena preening herself on the sun goddess' back. 
"Cadence came into my chambers earlier this evening, not long before you arrived. I sensed the foal then, but thought nothing of it. I was too...distracted to pay that much attention".
"Why? What activity were you engaged in?"
"I had some dreamwine. I wasn't exactly at my most alert state, shall we say". Celestia began to trot quicker, leaving her sister behind. Luna could tell that Celestia wasn't telling her something, the question was...what? She and her sister always told one another their worries, concerns or secrets. It was a bond they had shared since foalhood, so why was she keeping this, whatever it was, from her? Choosing not to pursue any further for the time being, the night alicorn followed her sister to Ward Seven.

Shining didn't hear the hoofsteps as the two goddesses approached him. The night had been the worst of his life so far, and he wasn't sure if he felt comforted or angered by presence of the two alicorns. He looked up wearily from the floor and regarded Luna with a brief nod, before locking gazes with Celestia, who only a short hour ago, he had kissed while his currently unconcious wife looked on in heartbreaking horror.
"My Princesses..." he said in an exhausted tone. Luna peered into the door that was labelled 'Ward Seven' in large red letters. The blinds were shut, so Luna turned away from the door and turned back to the white unicorn. 
"What do the physiciens proclaim about her condition? What harm has befallen Mi Amore Cadenza?"
Shining sighed. Usually Luna's unique way of talking would make him smile. But not tonight. Tonight was a night of mourning...and heavy, heavy grief.
"W-we lost...we lost the foal..." Shining choked before turning away, tears fallen once again down his cheeks.

The silence that followed was almost tangeable. Everything seemed muted, even the colours of the world around her. Celestia closed her eyes, a single tear falling from her right eye. This was far too much, too much for any pony, even a goddess, to bear in a single night.
"How did it happen?" she asked, trying as best she could to keep a sympathetic tone without crumbling into a crying wreck. Her guard captain looked at her with cold eyes. His armour was propped up against the wall next to him, and his coat was damp with tears. His mane was dishevelled and unruly, with tail limp and barely moving.
"After she ran...I followed her down the hallway, and she j-just fell. She just fell...she..." Shining was overcome with another tide of sorrow and turned away. Celestia did the same as Philomena let out a mournful cry.

Luna lowered her head in sympathy. The loss of a foal was something that she had never experienced, but from what she had seen here tonight, it was not something she wished too. The stars in her mane of pure night dimmed very slightly, and her eyelids half closed. But one thing kept nagging at the corner of her mind. Why did she run, and from where? She dared not ask at such a fragile time, but she would find out what had transpired to lead up to this tragedy, that she vowed to herself. Her sister kept it from her, whatever this event was, and that hurt Luna deeply...

It was over three hours before the trio of ponies could see Cadence, and by that time she was awake, if a bit drowsy. She was dressed in a white hospital gown, but all Shining saw was her wedding dress. That was the happiest day of his life - Changelings aside - and he wanted to remember that as she walked over to his silent wife. She sat upright on the bed, tugging at the blankets, but when she saw the face of her husabnd, she couldn't help but raise her arms to embrace him. They stood motionless in that state for over a minute, with Cadence finally weeping into Shining shoulder before whispering two words that she shouldn't of.
"I'm sorry..."
"W-what for? You've done nothing wrong" Shining said as he held her tight and close, stroking her beautifully coloured mane with a forehoof. 
"Our baby...would have been so beautiful...", Cadence wept, "...and I lost it"
Shining bit his lower lip to stop himself from crying out, but tears streamed from his blue eyes all the same. 
"No you didn't, this is all my fault...if i hadn't of...", he shot a glance at Celestia, who watched the couple with anguished eyes, "...It's my fault, my love, not yours..."
"It was a colt..."
Shining's ear perked up at the last line. He cupped his wife's face in his hooves and locked gazes with her. "What?"
"Our baby, he was a colt..." she replied, a tiny smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. Shining let out a brief smile himself. A colt? He was going to have a little baby colt? Both ponies looked at eachother with teary smiles, thinking of what could have been if the evening hadn't taken the course it had. It was a strange thing to be smiling at a time like this, but Shining knew it was because their lost child now had an identity, some substance on which to base their mourning and dreams. They were going to have a colt, a little Prince. 

Celestia let her remorse and guilt wash over her again. It was brining back painful memeories that she had kept hidden and locked away for over a thousand years, and she wasn't sure if she could stand composed for very much longer. She turned to the mourning couple before her. "I'll leave you two in peace..." she muttered before turning to exit the room. She felt Luna's gaze on her as she stepped back into the hospital corridor, but her sister did not follow. Celestia rapidly exited the building, arriving once again into the cool night air. Once beyond the doors of the hospital she spread her wings and took to the skies, startling philomena, who was still perched on her back at the time. She ascended gracefully into the darkness, circling around the hospital plaza before arcing back round to the roof of the building. She landed gently and folded her angelic wings to her sides quickly. The memories were painful, all of them bringing grief.

**************************************************

Tia looked at the ground as the muffled words of the doctor pony tumbled from his mouth. Dawn Fire's foreleg was draped over her withers, holding her tightly while his other forehoof clutched hers. Normally she would have felt safe and secure with her coltfirend by her side, but what the doctor said penetrated deep into her heart. 
It took a while to realise the doctor had finished speaking, only Dawn Fire's voice brought her back from her shock, and even then she did not move. She only spoke four painful words.
"I cannot have foals..."
The doctor pony sighed, "I'm afraid so princess, the result from the scans suggest that that is the case". A single tear trickled from Celestia's left eye as she began to shake. Dawn Fire hugged her firmly.
"Its okay Tia, we'll get through this. If we can't find any other way," he turned to the doctor, who gave him a sympathetic look, "then maybe we can adopt. I know it wouldn't be the same, but a least we can have the child that we wanted"
Celestia didn't know what to say
"But it wouldn't be OUR foal..." she muttered before collasping into her grief


It had been years since Celestia had returned to the Twin Peaks of Creation, but this was time that needed the type of comfort that only two loving parents can give. The white alicorn brushed the tops of the cream coloured clouds that she rode the wind above. The sun was setting below the cushion like clouds before her, guiding her way to the gardens were all life began. The home of the creator ponies, her parents.

Finally, Celestia spied the silhoettes of the two mighty mountains. The Twin Peaks of Creation were a sight that only immortals could see, and what a wondrous sight it was. The two mountains sat on top of the highest clouds, the setting sun creating a light that made the clouds look as if they were ablaze. Forests of every tree in the world covered the white rock of the two monolithic mountains, fed by dozens of sparkling waterfalls that cascaded from the two gardens of life at the summits. Celestia veered towards one of the two peaks, knowing that at least one of her royal parents would be their. She folded her seraphim like wings as she landed within a boundless and glorious forest. The leaves on the tall trees around her glistened like emeralds and green diamonds. The bark of every tree was inscribed with ancient swirls and patterns, much like the elegantly cured roots that sprung from the ground around her. Fairy lights flickered in the boughs of the taller trees, and despite the fact that the sun had almost completely disappeared, its glorious rays still shone through the verdant canopy. Celestia knew this as the peak of her mother judging by the surroundings, and so the alicorn trotted off in the direction she knew she would be.
After winding through a trail marked by glowing stones, Celestia arrived at the inner most sanctum of the true Sun Goddess. A vast lake streched before her, so vast it seemed impossible for it to be at the summit of a mountain. The crystal blue expanse mirrored the steadily darkening sky, but was still tempered with a golden white radiance that emanted from the small island at the centre of the lake. The princess stepped onto the water, and gasped as her hoof did not sink below the surface. She tentativelt took another step, and marvelled at the feeling of walking on water. The crystal clear liquid rippled at each hoofstep, but held her form above its surface. Before long, celestia arrived at the island, the white gold light still flaring brightly. The source was at the centre of a fertile glade of trees, bent inwards to form a dome of leaves and branches. Beneath the enchanted canopy stood Solairia, creator of Life, the Sun and the Day.

She stood far taller than Celestia, and her eyes held more wisdom and love than any other living thing. Her irises were of a deep durple tempered with sunlight, and she always wore a slight smile. Colossal radiant wings were streched behind her like a cape of shimmering white feathers, and her horn shone like a spike of burning gold. But by far the most impressive of her features were her mane and tail. Pure wildfire ran down her back and head, burning a thousand shades of gold and yellow, the tips keeping a constant shade of deep violet. Her beautiful, beautiful eyes found Celestia standing in awe at the edge of the glade.

"My child...you seem hollow" Solairia declared in a voice that commanded fear and respect, but sounded like the voices of songbirds at the same time. Celestia tossed her mane of green, pink and turquoise from her eyeline as she stepped timidly towards her mother. 
"Mother, I...". She couldn't do it. It was to much to bear. The fact that she was the daughter of the Queen of Life and Light, and she couldn't have children of her own...
"What is it child? Come to me" 
Celestia nuzzled up against her mother's side and folded her wings in close as Solairia's own draped over her daughter protectively.  "Me...me and Dawn Fire went to the p-physicens today, and they had s-some bad news...". Celstia breathed in deeply, closing her eyes and mustering the courage to utter the words. "I c-can't have foals..."
Surprisingly, her mother did not move or utter a sound. She remained perfectly still for over half a minute before lifting her head and looking to the twilight sky. 
"I'm so sorry, my dear Celestia...but no magic in this world or the next can give you the children you seek, not even mine..."
The Sun Goddess stood abruptly, rearing high and calling to the wind in the lost language of ponykind.

Less than a minute later, the tranquility of the glade was disturbed by the sound of beating wings. The light permeating the sacred grove began to dim sharply, until only a fraction of the illumination remained. Solairia no longer shone like the sun, as an even taller, stronger and equally impressive stallion marched towards her. 
"My love...", Stellarum whispered softly, and nuzzled Solairia's muzzle with his own. Celestia looked up at her regal father mournfully. 



To Be Continued....next chapter shall be almost entirely of the flashback scenes, continueing directs after this one. Feedback greatly encouraged :)