Cherchez la Femme
The first time I kissed Rainbow Dash, a little part of me died.
She approached me at my betrothed’s birthday party; I had noticed her earlier that evening standing apart from the rest of the crowd, but had thought nothing of it. I could tell that she had common blood from the way she held herself, the way she fidgeted, the way she spoke to anyone who passed by. An acquaintance of an acquaintance of an acquaintance of my lover, the birthday colt, I assumed. However, as the evening wore on and the wine flowed and my betrothed left my side to socialize with the other guests, she stomped up to me.
“You were staring at me earlier,” she said with a frown. Those magenta eyes—so large and confident and demanding—bore into mine with a fury that I couldn’t understand.
By then, the entire world had been covered in a thin film of drunken stupor. “Is that a problem?”
“Yeah.” She stepped forward, and I couldn’t help but appreciate how the dress she wore hugged her body so closely. Whoever had chosen the dress certainly knew what she was doing. “I only came because a friend wanted me to, and she ditched me about thirty seconds in. I’m not in the mood to let you nobles look down on me like I’m some kind of bug.”
“Well you do stand out,” I said, unable to stifle my giggle. Before she could respond—and she was going to respond, if the flash of anger in her eyes was any indication—I patted her shoulder. With my snow-white coat and thick blonde mane, currently put-up in an intricate bun, I could certainly understand how uncomfortable it felt to stand out. “Would you like a drink?”
She stared at me for a moment, perhaps suspecting a trap, and she was right to do so; I knew plenty of ponies who would jump at the opportunity to tease a commoner. Luckily for her, I was not one of those ponies.
“Sure,” she said at last.
I flagged a server and used my magic to float a pair of glasses over to us, then drained the one I already had before placing it on his tray. My new friend accepted one and took a deep mouthful.
“Not a bad vintage,” I said, swirling the glass.
She swallowed and made a face. “It’s alright.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. That small glass of wine held in her hoof was probably more expensive than everything she owned combined, and it was just “alright”?
“What’s your name?”
“Rainbow Dash,” she said, straightening her posture. A proud mare; I could respect that. “I’m a Wonderbolt.”
One of my eyebrows rose. “Impressive.”
I introduced myself as a friend of the stallion hosting the party and allowed Rainbow Dash to occupy the next few hours of my life as we stood away from the rest of the party goers. My friends could never hold my attention for more than a few minutes at a time, but this mare had me hooked. She was a weatherpony; she was an athlete; she was a Wonderbolt; she was the savior of Equestria. Each tale she told was taller than the last, but I didn’t care. This conversation, which had begun as a charity case on my part, quickly turned into the most fun I had ever had at one of these parties.
We swapped stories, and we drank glass after glass of wine, and we leaned on each other as the alcohol took away our balance, and we laughed at each other’s clumsiness on our way up the stairs. This was my betrothed’s mansion, and as such it was almost like a second home to me. Of course he wouldn’t mind me leading my new friend to a more private guest room.
Moments after the door closed behind us, she threw me onto the bed and lept after me. Her hooves roamed over my body, caressing and massaging in a way that felt wonderful in my muddled state.
I gave a weak groan. “What are you doing?”
“I’m sexing you,” Rainbow Dash said in a slurred voice.
“Why?”
She sat up, still straddling my waist. “Because I want to.” Those eyes, so confident before, were now almost tender and betrayed her hesitation. “Haven’t—haven’t you been shooting me signals this whole time?”
Of course I already knew this; I had more than once touched her on the shoulder, had leaned in a little closer than I should have, had deliberately slipped her glass after glass after glass of wine. My friends loved to tell stories all the time about how they had wooed a commoner, only to refuse their advances.
I wondered if they ever truly fell in love with those commoners.
Before this line of thought could go any further, Rainbow bulled forward to catch my lips. Hers tasted sweet and fruity, although I couldn’t quite place the flavor. Then I giggled—we had been drinking wine for the past few hours. My head felt light, making it difficult to think.
I didn’t have much time to wonder about that anyway when someone outside threw the door open and I pushed Rainbow to the side. My mind barely even registered her yelp; much more important was the tuxedoed stallion standing in the doorway, nostrils flaring.
My betrothed.
Words failed me, but even if they didn’t, there was nothing I could say to fix this. He opened his mouth, then snapped it shut, then opened it again, then snapped it shut again. This was how he always acted when angry, and this was the angriest I had ever seen him.
A sudden, roiling surge of fury boiled up in my stomach. “Happy birthday.”
The door slammed shut, and I heard him stomping away. Chances were this room wouldn’t be free for much longer.
“Was that your fiancé?” Rainbow asked, crawling back onto the bed.
Despite the panic welling in me, something struck me as odd. “Yes.”
“Oh.”
Everything had gone wrong. All I had wanted was to help out this poor, common mare; instead I had ended up ruining my marriage and sullying my family’s reputation. If I was lucky, my parents wouldn’t take away my inheritance. If I was unlucky, they might go so far as to disown me.
And it would all be this mare’s fault.
Rainbow scratched the back of her head. “So, where do we go from—”
My firm kiss interrupted her. She went limp for a second, then pushed me back down onto the bed. I wanted to cry, but I also wanted her; I needed her. I had to have her. She sucked at my lips with a fervor I had never felt from my formerly betrothed; this was the passion I had always sought.
Rainbow suddenly rolled off. I frowned and moved to sit up, but a wave of nausea swelled as the room spun around me. It wasn’t the alcohol; I had been drunk before, and this was something different. This felt like I had been running for an hour without rest. The most I could do with my legs was make them twitch. What was going on?
“Was that your fiancé?”
I had never told Rainbow Dash about my betrothal.
“Ugh, finally,” she said, stretching languidly. Her magenta eyes flared bright-green. “I can’t believe it took two.”
My mouth opened, but no sound would come out. My body was effectively paralyzed, and I had drank too much wine to properly focus. A thrill of fear danced down my spine.
“Then again, if it hadn’t, that guy would’ve caught me. Too bad for you, I guess.” She licked her lips, flashing a set of suddenly-sharp teeth. This was no pony. “Bon appetit.”
The first time I kissed Rainbow Dash, a little part of me died. The rest of me followed not long after.