Sugar

by WishSeeker

First published

Just something about the mane six and their views on sugar. Written on a sugar rush so may be a bit mental, why am publishing it, so you can all enjoy the sugary insanity of my mind. You've been warned.

NO SUGAR IS NOT A EUPHEMISM BEFORE ANYONE ASKS

The mane six have some insight on sugar.

Seriously, don't read it if you don't like short pointless monologues with no real insight. It only has the random tag, so you've been warned.

S is for sugar (Pinkie Pie's myth)

View Online

Oh sugar, how much I crave your hyper rush, and to taste your sweet flush. For all the worldly pain, is forgotten at your temporary gain. Just one more snack for the day, but you pay my teeth with decay. I still love you even with, your future consequence of a gift.

It's true ponies like sugary snacks, but sugar doesn't just come from nowhere. No it comes from somewhere. And that somewhere is the biggest and most strangest somewhere any of us ponies have ever heard of. See unicorns pull it from a nearby realm, and I heard tell it's called... Earth. Just like the pony kind. What a coincidence.

Anyway they say this guy, Hue Mon I think his name is, produces all the sugar we ponies could ever want. My question is why. Well I Pinkie Pie am here to investigate and will be writing this entry all the way. Although I might not write for an hour or so in my time, like this, but to you it will look like I'm always talking in one long flow.

So let's get started, as I said before someone called Hue Mon makes this sugar. According to an inside source at the sugar extraction industry I was wrong; it's actually made by lots of Hue Mons in that place called... Wait for it... Earth.

They collect it from these plants called Kane, weird name for a plant. And then they extract the sugar from Kane. They say the Hue Mons also grind sugar down to fine granulated sizes and put them in all kinds of food. Just like us, these Hue Mons seem like nice folk.

Once the unicorns drag it through the rifts between worlds they store it in large vats. Fun fact sugar for the Hue Mons is smaller, so we need only a little bit of theirs to supply most of Equestria. Those large vats separate the sugar to hundreds of different delivery trucks that take it all to various sites.

Sugar Cube Corner is one such sight and this is where I become the expert. As quoted by Pinkie Pie (me) what is a cubed corner without some sugar. In our fine store we can bake cakes and all sorts of other treats for ponies using sugar. From our Jelly Foals to our Gem and Berry's ice cream , everything we produce is made with whole sale, Hue Mon produced 95% sugar. Guaranteed to rot your teeth, but who cares, we have enough magic and potions to fix any ailment.

And that's the sad thing about these Hue Mons. They don't have magic or potions to fix their cavities, they're stuck with the dentist, and they can't fix problems only remove the worst teeth and give fillings. So I hereby declare a petition to help these Hue Mons and send a hundred unicorns a year to work on dental operations in Earth.

It's the least we can do for all of that sugary delight.

Did I also mention how much I love sugar.

Sugary Truths (Twilight's statement)

View Online

So sweet. Or not so sweet. That is the question.

Don't believe anything those crazy ponies tell you about sugar. There is no such thing as Earth, it's not scientifically possible to just rip a hole in space. You see sugar comes from farms like the apple farm of Sweet Apple Acres, except in a hotter climate.

Earth Ponies work tirelessly to collect this bounty and they barely get any pity from the common pony. We are all privileged, while poor hard working ponies starve, and for a luxury no less. I understand sugar is an important part to our treats but these ponies deserve better.

Another important thing to note is that sugar is bad for you. Yes sure you can just go and get fixes up by an old zebra cure or a unicorn spell but there are time limits. Of you don't get help soon you're teeth will be beyond repair. Nopony wants to have teeth missing, look after them.

Do you think Princess Luna or Celestia got their figure from gorging on sugary delights. You can bet your right hooves no. It is expected to monitor your amount of sugar intake and keep a strict diet. That is the only way anypony can avoid any nightmares.

All this talk of sugar has made me hungry. I might go get something from Sugar Cube Corner. This is Princess Twilight Sparkle signing out.

Umm Sugar? (Fluttershy's analysis)

View Online

Two sugars or three, maybe four with your tea. Sugar for you, no sugar for me

I, Um, did I just write um. Sorry. I'm sorry. Sugar? I like it in my tea. But I only have one spoonful, it's bad for you if you have too much. I'd never let the animals have some.

Discord likes sugar, he has six point seven two five eight three four nine spoonfuls of sugar, I'm not sure if that's healthy but he always asks if I want it in a fractional form. So I put three in and hope for the best. I'm sorry.

Sugar is sweet, like Angel, but can be dangerous, also maybe like Angel. Sorry Angel. But it needs to be taken in moderation. One time I was on a sugar high and I dropped a plate. It was horrifying, and I would never want anypony else to go through that. Maybe I have a problem.

I'm sorry sugar.

Sugarless (Rarity's Ordeal)

View Online

Not a drop of sugar for it is the devils substance, wait for it and it destroys you. Consume it and it becomes you. Love it and it owns you.

No no no. Sugar is not a delight, it is a curse. Long ago I loves sugar, it took my mind off the big handsome stallions, but now I realise its trick. Sugar takes you by the hoof and falls for you. It comes from the cakes and muffins of this world, and all the comfort foods you could want. A traitor in a guise.

I was huge. I couldn't fit into any of my beautiful dresses, and all because of a sugary addiction (and perhaps one too many hay burgers). The worst of its insidious arsenal, ice cream. The cold succubus of your love. It comes and brings you three litres of happiness and then soon runs away. Your heart torn and your body widened.

I had to go to a facility, take myself away from the craving. Thank Celestia I did before I sold my shop. Everything I owned went to be replaced by sugar treats, and I was running out of a livelihood. Then a mare gave mw the opportunity to change. So I took it and never looked back. I've been sugar free for a year now.

Your favourite unicorn, Rarity XOXO

Sugar Coated (Applejack's adventure)

View Online

If sugar be the sweet taste of foalhood, then what is the taste for the mare and stallions, be it the bitter beverages or the fruity drinks. No sugar is a leash for all of life.

I have had sugar before, but I've never really cared too much for it. I bake I into some of my many apple recipes but it's just sugar right? What's so amazing about it.

Apples are the real taste of our land, but I guess I should embrace what the foals are doing today. I tried some of Pinkie's extra sugary coated super ice cream cupcakes today, and to be fair they were sweet but they're not apples. Apples are better by a long shot.

Then again thinking about sugar since is getting me going for it. I guess it's an acquired taste. Maybe I'll order a batch of those sugary delicious treats. No. I'm an apple, and I stand with them.

I'll just sample another batch tomorrow to clarify apples are better. Maybe sugar coated apples would be nice.

Sugar rush (Rainbow Dash's desire)

View Online

Sugar is fast, one minute it's there, the next gone.

Woooooo! Sugar! What is better than my awesomeness alone, my awesomeness times sugar. You think I'm fast clean, wait till you see me on my rush. I get from A to B faster than anyone can say A B. It's amazing like my awesomeness, plus my radicalness times a little extra greatness for luck.

But yeah, there are drawbacks. I guess the down is a pain, I crashed into my front door because of it once. So it has it's problems, but nothings perfect. Except perhaps my awesome, amazing radicalness. Question is why do ponies like it so much.

Sugar is sweet for one, makes you hyper for two and is awesome for three. I can't be expected at my best without a dose of sugar from Pinkie, it's the best hype since cheering became a thing. I live it and so should every pony else.

Anypony that says otherwise is just a snob, oh sugar is bad for you, huh yeah right. They say everything is bad for and that's why they look like twigs, come on beef up a little. I have plenty of sugar in my diet and I'm probably the healthiest pony in Ponyville. Trust me when I say sugar's great, especially when you have a good dentist.