What happens when an average male teenage gamer, gets launched into a land of ponies while playing a game?
Cancelled! Sorry!
What happens when an average male teenage gamer, gets launched into a land of ponies while playing a game? Now, watch as Josh tries to survive in a place where magic really does exist, with the power of Garry's mod.
Meet Josh. Josh is your everyday teenager, doing regular teenage things, such as playing video games. Josh isn't by any means unintelligent, but he isn't an A student. Just a regular guy, all around... boring, right? Well, that's what he thought. He wasn't the only kid his parents had, in fact, he's adopted. With five other siblings, and him being the middle, quiet kid he is, he's often forgotten or left out. At school, it doesn't get much better. The fact that he's quiet, and a brick in the wall, seems to attract bullies. At first it was the name calling, then, racial slurs. Of course he'd be called names. He had no friends and was over all, uninteresting. Race however, was a different thing entirely. Being black, in a predominately white neighborhood, was bound to cause some issues. This changed when he played on his computer, more specifically, Garry's mod. In this game, he was whoever he wanted to be, and he was happy. He had tons of friends on steam and over 1000 hours on Gmod alone. Playing that game was what made him feel great. Which is what he was doing when it happened.
Josh was doing what he'd normally do, search the workshop on steam, for anything interesting, when something caught his eyes. 'A friend request?' He thought. 'Who would send me one? maybe someone from a server I played on.'. He went to check it, and what he confused him greatly. A person with the username theGM had sent him a friend request. 'Well, maybe he's cool. I'll accept it and message him.'. After accepting the request, he started typing in the chat. {yo who is this?} He wrote. Josh was honestly curious to find out who it was. {I have been watching you Josh.} Alarm bells went off in Josh's head. This guy knew his name, and that wasn't good. {Who is this???} Josh was getting nervous now.{I know how boring your life seems. How about I make it more, Interesting?} Josh was very nervous now. Did this person know where he lived? Was this person going to kill him and his family or something? {Have fun kid.}
Josh felt something tugging on him, like someone grabbing his shirt. He looked down, and what he saw, made him terrified. There was a black portal underneath him, and it was pulling him in. Before he could even think to scream, he was pulled in, and he knew no more. He looked around for something to grab on to, or anything that could help him, but he found nothing. Just then, the darkness around him, turned a familiar shade of blue, and he saw the Garry's mod symbol pop up in front of him. Josh knew he should have been freaking out, but, he was more curious. He went to reach for the symbol and immediately regretted that decision. Pain shot through his body, and he let out a cry, but as quick as it happened, it was gone. The world around him went black once more, and the next thing he knew, he was in a castle of some sort. Josh was without words. He had no idea what just happened, and right now, he needed to find out where he was, and see if he can get back.
Josh began to walk down the hallway of the castle he was in, and looked around. The purple walls and red carpet signaled royalty and wealth. He found two big doors at the end of the hall and stopped in front of them. 'I wonder if there'll be a boss of some sort behind this door. That's a scary thought.' He opened the doors, and, he had no idea what to expect, but ponies? And not just any ones, they were the ones on the workshop he downloaded months ago. There were seven of them, and all eyes were on him as soon as he opened the door.
He looked at all of them closely, and he could tell, this would end up bad for him in some way. He looked at the horse on the throne. It looked female, from what he could guess, and had a flowing multicolored mane, spotless white fur, and magenta eyes. This horse had wings and a horn, and he was confused by that alone. He knew intelligence when he saw it, it was pretty obvious this horse thing, was smart in someway. He looked at the others. The first one he saw, had pink fur, a bubbly pink mane, and light blue eyes that radiated happiness and innocence. The second one, had Blue fur, a rainbow colored mane, wings, and magenta eyes, and she was glaring at Josh. The third one had tan fur, a blonde mane, and a hat. This one wasn't glaring, but gave a look of caution and distrust toward Josh. The fourth one had white fur that looked very clean, a purple stylish mane, a horn, and blue eyes. This one was somewhat scared of Josh in some way. The fifth one had purple fur, a violet mane with a neon pink stripe running through it, and purple eyes that shined with intelligence, and the willingness to learn. This one had wings and a horn also, which again, confused Josh even more than the others. Finally, he looked at the last one, who seemed very terrified. This one had yellow fur, a light pink mane, and cerulean eyes that had fear in them.
Josh didn't think six ponies and a horse could help him get home in any way, so, he began to turn around and walk away, but nothing ever goes as planned for him. When he started to turn, the blue one rushed at him very quickly, and he just barely dodged in time by jumping out of the way. The flying blue one ran into the wall, and what happened next, surprised and confused him at the same time. He heard a voice say "Rainbow!". Josh looked around. Nobody had said anything because, he was the only human around. He looked at the ponies and the horse again. The ponies looked unhappy, and the horse had an unidentifiable look. Josh began to back up slowly to the door. "Nice mutant, horse thingies," He said nervously."Let's not do anything crazy, okay?" "Ya hurt Rainbow Dash!" The tan one yelled at Josh. He froze. His brain couldn't process what just happened. 'What the hell?' He thought.'Did that thing just speak?' He was really nervous now. " He-Hey now," Josh stuttered out."No reason to hurt me, pony." Josh was panicking internally. He didn't know what to do. He heard a yell from behind him, and he turned around. When he did, apparently, the blue one wasn't out for the count. He was hit in the chest and flew backwards into the wall on the other side of the room. Josh groaned in pain, and did something he'd do when bullies hit him. Play dead. He struggled for a moment then, from his sitting position, slumped to the ground on his face, and stopped moving.
"Is it knocked out?" One of the ponies asked. "I don't know," Another answered. "We should lock it up!" A different one exclaimed. "Let's do that first. Then maybe study it." One stated. Josh had a coppery taste in his mouth, and knew what he could do. He knew it was a dumb idea, but, it could help him. He heard them walk over to him. He then felt himself being lifted by something, and it didn't make sense. Normally limbs are used to move things, but he felt none. He opened his eyes and saw his arms had a purple aura around him. He looked at the group slowly, and spit the blood he had collected near them, which wasn't a good idea. The purple one panicked and dropped him. Hard. The yellow one screamed, the pink ones mane went strait, the small white one fainted, the tan one looked shocked, while the blue one froze, looking at the blood.
Josh pushed himself up off of the floor, and as he did, ponies with spears came running in. He attempted to stand, but was in too much pain. He groaned, strained, and finally stood up. He glared at the ponies, and started backing up. He heard a sound he couldn't recognize and felt something hit him. He was struggling to stay awake, and he was losing. Josh fell on his side, and his conscious knew no more.
Josh groaned, he had felt like he had been hit by a truck, which after going through what he did, he might as well have. He opened his eyes and again, regretted that decision. The light blinded him, causing him to close them. He tried to open his eyes again, but this time, slowly. He went to lift his hand, but found that he couldn't. He realized he had been cuffed to a chair. 'No point in struggling.' he thought. Josh looked around, and found a table in front of him. He eventually started to piece together on where he was. He was in some kind of Interrogation chamber. He knew because, his father, had worked for the police, and Josh was very attracted to the idea of becoming one himself. Josh was very unhappy. Not only had he been hurt pretty badly for doing nothing, he was tied to a chair. This was not ideal. To make matters worse, the silence was deafening, because tinnitus was a thing for him. After 3 minutes of the ringing, the door opened, revealing a white pony in guard armor.
Josh was anxious, to say the least. The last thing he wanted on his epitaph was killed by a horse and her colorful friends. She moved up to the table and sat down in front of him.
"Can you understand me?" She asked slowly. Josh was a little hurt. He knew she didn't mean it in a bad way, but still, he was intelligent. Josh could do one of four things: He could comply, which would most likely get him out of here quicker, He could remain completely silent, but that could end up with him getting nowhere anytime soon. He could try and be intimidating, but that would most likely result in him getting thrown into a cell, Or he could do a more entertaining option. He could do what the military does and more. To see what would happen, Josh went with option four.
"Joshua Wright, Civilian, 1001001."
"What? What does that mean?" She asked
"Joshua Wright, Civilian, 1001001." He was going to see how long he could do this.
"I don't understand what you mean."
"Joshua Wright, Civilian, 1001001." She was getting annoyed now
"What does that mean?!"
"Classified."
"Why is that classified?"
"Classified."
"Why. Is. That. Classified?" She was getting mad
"Joshua Wright, Civilian 123456789." That did it. She was about to hit him, but just before she could do that, the door opened again. It was the big white one from earlier.
"Princess Celestia!" The small one bowed.
"Sergeant Small Spear, you are dismissed" Celestia ordered
"But Princess-!" She started
"I will be fine" Celestia interrupted. The pony left, but not before glaring at Josh one more time.
Celestia looked at Josh, studying him, and Josh did the same. He wanted out of this chair badly, but he had no way out. He knew he'd have to comply to get out, so he did just that. "Hello," Josh spoke.
"Greetings, I am Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria." She Introduced herself "Who are you?" She asked
"I am Joshua. Joshua Wright." He answered. "So uh, why am I chained to a chair?"
"I didn't want you to hurt anypony, so I had it done." She answered.
"I wouldn't dream of it, but can you let me go? I kinda need to go home." He asked. Celestia looked at him.
"I'll let you go," She said. Josh's hope rose! He'd be able to get out of this crazy place, and go home! "On one condition.". 'Dammit!' Josh thought. 'Almost thought I'd get out free!'
"You answer some questions I have, and I'll let you go." She stated.
"That seems reasonable." Josh answered.
"What are you?" She asked.
"I'm a human."
"Where are you from?"
"Earth."
"Why did you do what you did in the throne room?"
"Because, I thought if I played dead, you'd leave me alone. I was wrong."
"Are you going to harm anypony if I let you go?"
"Nope.
"Finally, What are your intentions?"
"To figure out why I'm here." Josh answered all the questions, and like Celestia said she'd do, she let him go. She used her magic to unlock the handcuffs, and they fell on the floor."Thanks." Josh said."Do you know where I could stay for awhile?" Josh asked."Just until I find a way home?" Josh asked.
"Yes," Celestia answered."You could stay in a town called Ponyville, with a friend of mine I know."
"Okay, so... can I go there now?"
"Yes. Just let me get a carriage and send a note to her."
Celestia began to walk out of the room, and Josh followed. Josh began to think about the crazy circumstance that he was in. He knew it had to be real, because he felt pain, but at the same time, it made little logical sense. 'Unicorns and Pegasuses that can talk? If he told anyone about this, he'd be labeled insane.
"Why are you letting me out so easily?" Josh asked. He was curious, and confused. On Earth, she would be experimented on, or just left in prison, so he was wondering. "What's the catch? What do you want?" He knew there was more to it. Celestia gave him a look he couldn't quite understand, but didn't say anything. 'Probably a stupid quest of some sort.' He concluded.
After Celestia sent the letter, she lead him outside into the courtyard, where a carriage was waiting. The first thing he noticed, was that there were ponies attached to it. He knew this wouldn't be fun.
"Well, see ya." Josh said.
"Likewise." Celestia responded.
Josh got on the carriage, and it took off into the air. To say he was not expecting that, would have been an understatement. He yelped when it took off, and for most of the ride, he was hanging onto his seat with a death grip. When it touched down, he ran out of it, and swore he'd never do that again. Josh looked around at the town, and he felt like this town would have a lot of crazy things happen to it while he was here. Josh assumed he'd have to wait for the friend Celestia was speaking about, and he did, but not for long. A purple pony he immediately recognized, was running towards him.'I'm going to die here, aren't I?' He thought.
When she finally made it to Josh, she didn't look happy to see him. More surprised, curious, and a little mad. "Hello, I'm Josh," he introduced." I think we may have had a bad first impression, and I'd like to fix that." He kindly stated. Josh knew he had to get on her good side. He figured she'd be the one he'd be staying with. "Yes, well, I'm Twilight Sparkle, and you'll be staying with me." She stated. "Follow me." she asked as she began to walk. Josh began to tune her out as she talked about the town. After a while of walking, they came up to a crystalized tree with a castle on it. "Twilight? Is this where we are staying?" He asked. "Yeah," She answered."It's the castle of friendship." "...Yeah okay." He was not buying it. "Let's just get in-" Josh was interrupted because, suddenly, he was in the air. "...Well, shit." Was the only thing he muttered out as he fell to the ground.
Josh ended up in the Everfree forest, and he was not very happy. He was wondering how he was alive, because by all means, he should be dead . Josh noticed something that began to help him understand what was going on. He saw a Yellow health counter that showed 50. He started to piece together what was going on. He had the powers of his favorite game. Garry's Mod. He looked around, and realized, he was lost. He had to find his way back and explain to Twilight that he was okay, and kill the thing that almost killed him. Josh began to walk through the forest looking for a path, or anything that would lead him out. "I wonder..." He thought out loud"Let's see if I can spawn a gun..." He tried thinking of the physics gun, and it appeared in his hands. "Cool!" Josh cheered. He knew there would be questions if he was seen with it, and he didn't know how this happened anyways, so he thought of his hands, and the physgun was gone.
After a long while of walking, he saw the edge of the forest. "Things are looking up!" Josh said, and began to run forward. He made it out and he saw Celestia fly into town. Josh was confused, because he didn't understand why Celestia was here. He walked into town, and saw Twilight, Celestia, and the other five ponies he 'met' the other day. Twilight was from what it looked like. He walked up to them. "Hey! What's wrong?" He asked. Twilight looked up at him.
"Josh! You're okay!" Twilight exclaimed happily
"Yeah, yeah whatever." He dismissed her. "What happened?" He asked
"Well," Twilight began "When you got close to the castle, you disappeared. I had no id-"
"Twilight," Josh interrupted "I need to know how it happened, not what happened after."
"Hey! Be a little nicer!" The blue one yelled. It seemed to Josh, she yelled a lot.
"Did I address you?" He asked the one he named Loudmouth.
"What?"
"Did. I. Address. You?" He enunciated
"Um, no?"
"Well then I don't want to hear you."
"Excuse me?!" She shouted.
"Let me rephrase that," Josh sarcastically replied "When you yell, it makes my head hurt, so can you shut up?"
"Josh! That's mean!" Twilight gasped
"Well, she started it!"
"Did not!"
"Who's the idiot who hit me in the throne room? Hmm?" He spat. "Yeah. You." Josh glared at her, then looked at Twilight. "Wanna see something cool?" He asked.
"Um, sure?" Josh pulled out his physgun and pointed it at a tree. "Josh, what is-"
"Hold all questions until after I do this!" Josh then pulled the tree out of the ground, roots and all. "Tada!" No one said anything for a few seconds, then Celestia spoke.
"Josh, What is that?" She inquired.
"Oh, nothing! It just allows me to pick things up, aaaandd stick it wherever I please." He answered as he stuck the tree in mid-air. "Yep!" He smiled. Celestia wasn't smiling back, In fact, she seemed... less than pleased. "Umm, is there a problem?" Josh was getting nervous. He then realized what was happening. The Physgun was ripped from his hands, and by none other than the princess herself. "Hey! Taking things without asking, isn't nice!" He half-joked. "Seriously though, give it back please."
"You told me you couldn't hurt my ponies. This proves that you can." She told him.
"Now hold on there, I said I wouldn't hurt them. Not that I couldn't." Josh corrected.
"Regardless, I'm taking this from you, until I trust you."
"Okay, but don't mess with it please, It could explode or something." He said. "Okay I'm tired, I'm gonna go sleep now." He said as he bunnyhopped away.
"What? Josh wait!" Twilight followed him.
Five minutes after running around, he found the castle, and walked up to the big doors, Twilight was right behind him.
"I'm tired. Is there a couch I can sleep on?" Josh asked.
"What?" Twilight breathed out. She had been chasing Josh all over town.
"Guest bedroom or something?" He asked again.
"Yeah," She panted "Go up the stairs, then two doors to your right."
"Thanks!" Josh yelled as he ran inside. He went straight into the guest room, and to the bed. He let out a long breath as he laid down. "Well today was eventful, I bet tomorrow will be more." He said as he began to fall asleep.
Guess who's back? Bac- I'll get a copyright violation, so just.. You know. Anyways! Yeah. Not dead, and taking it back! I'm healthy (somewhat) enough (not really) to begin writing again! Great! Woo! Yay! It won't suck this time... I hope. So yeah. I'm going to take it back, and get back on it! So uhhh.... Next chapter coming soon! Thanks for support and stuff!
Josh typically didn't dream, and when he did, his dreams were nightmares. It didn't faze him much at all, he knew the difference of a dream and reality. What did surprise him though, was how he had a nightmare in his current 'situation'. Josh woke himself up, annoyed at whatever he had dreamt about. He tried to remember, but the more he did, the fuzzier it became. He gave up and looked around, remembering where he was.
"Not a dream, is it?" He sighed. "Welp. Time to figure out what I can do!" He jumped out of the bed and walked out of the room. Josh was still a bit mad that his phygun was taken from him, but he had no doubt he could spawn another. As he was walking down the stairs, the last pony he wanted to see was with Twilight.
Rainbow Dash.
Josh knew this couldn't end well. At least, for him. He sighed, and moved towards the two, focusing on Rainbow Dash.
"Oh Josh! You're up!" Twilight smiled at him.
"...What's she doing here?" Josh got straight to the point.
"Rainbow?" He knew where this was going. The arrogant prick was going to apologize, and everything was going to be 'all cool'. Josh was having none of that.
"Liste-" Rainbow Dash began, but was cut off.
"Let me stop you right there," He began. "I know what you are going to say, and no. The answer is no."
"What do yo-"
"I don't wanna be friends with someone I don't trust yet."
"Now hold on th-"
"Nope. You did attack me, and I don't trust you yet. A while later? Maybe. Now? Nope, but I do forgive you for it. I would've done the same." Josh walked away, completely ignoring the two ponies behind him.
He felt a little bad, honestly. He knew she meant to protect her friends, but he didn't trust any of the ponies, and Rainbow was the most aggressive one he's met by far. He shook off the guilt and walked outside of the castle. Josh had remembered where the forest was, and figured, it was the safest place to try to see if he could spawn things, and do other things. He also knew if he was caught, he'd likely get into trouble. He rationalized it as something he had to do, as using the abilities that Garry's Mod offers could be lifesaving at some point. Josh was not, however eager to die to see if he'd respawn, as he had felt pain, and bled. At some point though, he knew he'd have to do it. He looked at his health counter. It was still 50, so that was okay for now. Finally reaching the forest, he wanted to test out two things that would be amazing to have. No clipping and God Mode(A.N. Yep.). Josh attempted no clipping first, as being able to fly away and through anything would be more useful now, he thought. He didn't even focus hard on the idea, as he remembered pressing 'z'. Sure enough he was able to stick his hand through a tree. He 'flew' around for a bit, ecstatic that he had figured it out so quickly.
Josh came back to the ground, and he tried looking at his spawn menu. Funny enough, all of the mods he had downloaded, and some he didn't, were there for him to use. He looked for his favorite gun mod, Fa:S. Sure enough, it was there. Josh was normally not a weapon fanatic, but being so excited about everything was clouding his judgement. He spawned every gun in the modpack, and all of MK9 too. 'Huh. Probably a bad idea for me to have all of these weapons.' He reasoned. He kept his 'hands' out, and walked back to the town. Josh could hardly hide his happiness, and was practically skipping. For him though, these things don't last. He was already unnerved by the ponies, but it turned out rumors were spreading. Now Josh was hoping the glares and scared looks would go away. This went on for about ten minutes, and for some reason, a mob of ponies were looking for him.
What confused him was, they had already seen him before. Why now were they beginning to get aggro? Josh was beginning to think something was very wrong. He ran toward the castle, moving as fast as he could. He wasn't fast enough it seems, as the mob found him.
"This can only go so well," He muttered.
"You! Monster! What are you doing here?" One male pony yelled out.
"Excuse me, what did you say?" Josh had decided to talk to the obviously mad ponies.
"Leave Ponyville! Or else!"
"Okay." Josh shrugged, turned around and began to walk away. He was stopped when a pony threw a rock at his head. It nailed him, and he stumbled a bit. He checked his health. The yellow counter showed 45. Josh turned around, and the tension rose. He saw others use magic to pick up things. It was time to leave. Josh turned tail and ran as fast as he could. Pegasi(?)swooped at him as unicorns, and earth ponies chased him, and threw things. "Stop it! What the hell is wrong with you ponies?!?" He screamed. Josh had almost made it to the forest, but he tripped. At that moment, he knew it was over. His health dropped rapidly, and without stopping. Just when he thought he was going to die, he heard the loudest voice he had ever had the displeasure of hearing.
"STOP!!!!" It seemed Twilight had found him. Josh checked his health again. It was at one. He watched as the ponies parted, as Twilight yelled some more. The other elements came as well. Josh couldn't believe this! He was beyond mad, and he was hurting. A little while later, the mob of demon ponies left, and the Mane six came running. Josh didn't trust them before. Now, even though they weren't involved, he was now deeming all of them as dangerous. He struggled to his feet, and glared at them.
"Josh! Are you okay?" Twilight asked.
"What do you think, hmm? I was almost killed!" He yelled. That seemed to shock them, and they stared wide eyed at him. "Get the other princess! I wanna talk to her!"
"Josh I-"
"No!" He barked. "Go. Get. Her. NOW!" Josh had never been this mad before, and normally he controlled his anger, but now, he couldn't. They froze. No one moved for what felt like forever. Josh groaned angrily and no clipped away. He knew that was a bad choice, but he needed to cool off. Josh flew into the forest, not being stealthy about it at all. He wanted to blow something up. So that's what he did. Josh went up very high, and saw a desert a long ways away. He took out a davy crocket, aimed, then fired. About a minute later, a loud explosion was heard. All across Equestria, it was seen. A large mushroom cloud, and light was seen for 25 minutes, then, it disappeared. Calm now, he came back, and Celestia was standing there. She wasn't happy, that much he was able to tell, but at who, he was unsure.
"Celestia, we need to talk." He spoke.
"I agree." She gave Josh a stern look. "When were you going to inform me you could fly?" She asked.
"Well, it's not really flying..." He said sheepishly.
"What is it, then?" She inquired.
"No clipping." Josh answered
"'No clipping'?" She gave a confused look.
"It means I can go through solid objects."
"What?" That didn't help her confusion
"Nevermind, I'll show you later."
"What was that explosion?"
"I did that. Sorry. I got mad, and well...."
"Well what? I thought you said you wouldn't hurt my little ponies."
"I didn't. They harmed me though. I'm barely alive right now. Speaking of which, WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!" He yelled. Celestia flinched a bit at his harsh language. "I thought ponies were FRIENDLY! What the HELL was that, huh?!" a crowd was forming, and Josh kept pressing. "Why would they DO that?! What did I do?! Oh, I know. I EXISTED!"
"Josh I- I'm sorry you ha-" Josh cut her off.
"You aren't the one responsible. I'm mad at those....those....monsters." Josh calmed down. "Anyways, they do it again, I will die, and honestly? I don't like the idea of dying." He huffed.
"...What would you like me to do?" That threw him through a loop. She wanted to help him? It was obvious she was sorry, but also a little mad for him holding things back. Still, Josh was trying to find every angle she could have. It never was just that easy.
"I'd like to speak to the ponies here."
"Then speak."
"Attention, you little demons!" Josh began. "Could you not? Please? Like, seriously, I know I look different, but nearly killing me?! Come on! Let's chill out, and talk about things next time. Oh, and don't do that again, or else." He ended his speech, then turned to Celestia. "Now, I'm pretty sure the others and you yourself have questions. Lets go answer them." And that's what they did.
"Look, I know you have questions," Josh told the ponies. "I'll answer them as best I can, but to be fair, I'd rather you didn't ask anything personal."
"First things first," Twilight began. "How did you fly?"
"Well it isn't completely flying...." He explained. "It's kind of like, Not being affected by the laws of physics." He 'flew' up. "See? I can do this for as long as I like, and I can go through solid objects."
"...What?" Was Twilight's intelligent response.
"Next. You with the hat! What's your name?"
"Ahm AppleJack! Ahm wonderin how strong are you?" The tan one asked.
"Well, I'm not godly, but you'd be hard-pressed if we were fighting." He answered."Next! How about you? The yellow one? What is your name?" She shrank into her mane. "Relax, we are all friendly here! 'Sides, I'd die if I fought any one of you." That got their attention.
"Josh...What do you mean?" Twilight asked.
"I mean, on a scale of zero to one-hundered , zero being dead, one-hundered being perfectly healthy, I'm at one." They gasped. "Relax! Just don't hit me, and I won't die!" He said all too cheerfully. "Next!"
"Wait wait wait!" Twilight exclaimed. "We need to get you help!"
"Do you know of any pony doctors who know of the human body?" No answer. "Well, then I'll deal with it. NEXT! You! Whitey!"
"Must you be so rude?" She huffed out. "A good gentlestallion treats ladies with respect."
"Well, to answer your question, yeah, I do have to be that rude, because one: I'm not a 'gentlestallion'. Two: because I can. Three: Because you didn't tell me your name." Josh kept going. "NEEEXT! You! Pinky!"
"I was wonderingwhatyourfavoritecupcakewasordohumansnothavecupcakes!GASP!ohnothat'ssadhumansdon'thavecupcakeshowdidyouknowmynamewaspinkypieareyouaspymaybeyoulikecakesorchocol-!"
"Hold on there! Humans do have cupcakes, but no, I don't have a favorite, because I don't like cupcakes." He explained. The other five stood there, with their mouths wide open."What?...What?" Josh was confused.
"...You don't like cupcakes?"
"No. I don't. I never have liked sweets, at all really." Josh knew something was off about the pink one.
"How..how did you understand any of that?" Twilight asked flabbergasted.
"Oh, well, she's quite easy to understand really, you just have to listen for key words." Josh answered. "That's it. Time's up! So about that physgun? I have another one. And the one you took? Gone. I made it disappear. Anyways, yell for me when you need me, cause I'm gone!" With that, Josh noclipped through the ground, and went toward the forest. He came up through the ground, and found himself at a castle.
"Hmm. Castle. Old, in ruins? Loot!" Josh ran inside.
Josh wasn't much of a builder when it came to Gmod, but he knew enough to keep raiders out of his home. Most of the time. He had finished awhile ago, and now he was making sure the fading doors worked. He chuckled to himself, noting that since there were no rules against it, he could be a dick, and abuse the hell out of the fading doors. Josh looked at his health again, and sighed. It was still at one. He had to fix that at some point, so he reasoned now would be a good time. He opened the spawn menu and looked in his entities. Josh quickly spawned in a few health packs and, within seconds, his health was back to 100. He knew at this point, there's no way this was a dream of some sort, and he also knew he was basically a god. If he wanted to, he probably could take over Ponyville in about thirty minutes, and kill everything in there. He also knew that the ponies were pretty strong, and could kill him. Josh paused his thoughts of mass murder and destruction for a moment, because him dying was something he needed to figure out. It's not that he feared dying at all, no. It was more of if he can respawn. Josh wasn't too excited to try this out for obvious reasons, but it had to be done at some point. He was glad he'd downloaded so much from the workshop, because it gave him so many more ways to protect himself, one of them being cameras. He knew the ponies would eventually come looking for him, especially Twilight. It came as no surprise that Celestia came as well. He reasoned she must be pissed off at him for shooting a nuke, and not telling her that he could do that.
Josh didn't care.
All seven of the ponies approached the castle, which didn't look like much of a castle now. The entrance was covered by a big metal slab, and there were several cameras on the outside. If Josh didn't know any better, he'd think they were about to fight him by the way they came up to the door.
"What do you want?!" He yelled out, hidden behind the fading door. "If it isn't obvious, I'm a little preoccupied at the moment!"
"Josh?! Did you do all of this?!" Twilight yelled back. If she wasn't miffed at him for messing with delicate ruins, she'd be more curious.
"Hold on a second!" Josh opened the fading door, and walked out to meet them. "So, what do you want?"
"Josh, what did you do to the Castle of the royal pony sisters?!?!" Twilight screamed at him. He looked at the ponies faces. They all had some level of anger or discontent. He didn't understand why, as the castle was run down and abandoned.
"I took it over, and made a home for myself." He stated. "I mean, it's not like you were using it for anything, right?"
"You are correct Josh, but we've been looking for you for awhile now," Celestia said. "I'd like to know what that explosion was that you caused. You said you wouldn't harm my ponies." There it was. That's what Josh was waiting for.
"Correction, I said I wouldn't harm them if they didn't harm me." He returned quickly. "And, if I recall, my health was at one. How did THAT happen, you might ask?" His voice dripped with sarcasm, as Celesta looked away. "You happened. So, technically, I didn't break my word."
"Still," Twilight spoke up "You should have told us you could do that!"
"Let me stop you right there," Josh retorted. "Would you tell someone-"
"Somepony." Twilight 'corrected'.
"SomeONE," He continued. "Who you consider an enemy, or at least someone you dislike, ANYTHING about you at all?"
"We aren't your enemies, Josh," Celestia insisted.
"Ha, funny. So, you attack all new people you meet like that?" He questioned, then shook his head. "Whatever, it doesn't matter. So, you probably have questions you want to ask right? And I have questions too. So how about, we cut the shit, and get this over with, huh?" The ponies flinched at the language.
"I suppose, if it's alright with everyone else..." Celestia said. All the ponies there said something of agreement.
"Okay, so... go ahead." Josh spawned a chair and sat in it.
"How did you do that? No magic allows you to create something out of nothing." Twilight, of course was the first to ask a question.
"I spawned it in, and it's not magic. Next."
"Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!" Pinkie Pie hopped in place while waiving her hoof in the air. "Me next! Do you like parties?!"
"No. Next?" Josh knew he said something wrong as soon as his words left his mouth. Pinkie Pie's whole demeanor changed.
"How can you not like parties..?"
"I'm not a social person. You." He pointed at Rainbow Dash. "I'm dying to hear what you have to say." He drawled. She growled a bit.
"How come you're such a jerk, huh?! What did we do to you?!" She demanded an answer.
"Because," Josh began "One; I have literally nothing to lose. Two; You've done nothing to show you even want to be friends with me. Three; It's how I cope with life. And four? I just don't give a shit." Josh answered. He noticed that the ponies didn't seem to like his answers, judging by the looks on their faces.
"What do you mean, you have nothing to lose?" Twilight asked. "And what did you mean by, 'It's how I cope with life,'?"
"I meant, I have NOTHING of value at this moment to lose for not caring what happens to me or you. And by 'It's how I cope with life,' I meant, life can get pretty bad for me, and in order to not kill myself or die, I joke about it."
"That's mean..." Fluttershy 'said'.
"Yeah," Josh had heard her. "I didn't come from a nice place. I came from a place where humans, like me, were killed because of the color of their skin. I come from a place, were people are bullied to the point they take their own lives. I come from a place were people literally blow themselfs up for their religion. I watch others beat someone to death, just because they could. That's not to mention that murder is so common, that they had the stats for it at 11,961 people total, in the United States of America. I live in the U.S. so, this is what I see on the news all the time. I'm sort of used to it now."
"Josh that's...that's terrible..." Twilight spoke, and the others nodded. He noticed Pinkie Pie's hair was long and straight, and she seemed to be... sad? He couldn't tell, but he kept a closer eye on her.
"Yeah, it is." He agreed. "The good news is, the people who do this, get punished." That seemed to cheer them up a bit.
"I had no idea you came from such a place..." Celestia began, but Josh cut her off.
"I don't want sympathy, because it won't fix anything. Just ask a question, and we'll call it good."
"Josh," Rarity said. "Why do you wear such hideous clothes?"
"I don't know, why do you care?" He countered. "Next?"
"Why d'ya swear so much?" Applejack asked.
"Because it gets the point across quickly."
"I have a question Josh," Celestia started. "How did you cause that explosion?"
"I shot a nuke." Josh answered. "I'll explain what that is later, because right now? I'm feeling adventurous!" He no-clipped into the air. "Can we continue this later? I want to see what I can find!" Josh flew away, knowing they wouldn't follow him. Hopefully.
"Wait!" Twilight shouted, trying to get his attention. Josh heard it, but he was already long gone.
Josh had flown up, and headed towards the desert. Spawning in a sniper, he saw the badlands. He was no physic , but he knew something was wrong with it. Of course, he had to be correct, because when he flew close, he noticed 15 black bug-like ponies with holes riddled in them. Josh wasn't sure if he should be disgusted or scared of the things, but they looked too cute to him. He landed far enough away they couldn't see him, as he equipped his M4. Josh came out, and kept his finger on the trigger. He approached what he now dubbed 'buggers' slowly, and spoke in his most commanding voice: "You too! Up there! Take me to your leader!" He smiled. "I've always wanted to say that..!" Apparently they didn't like that, because a few decided to power up their crooked horns with a green light. Josh knew what would happen next, and before any of them could loose their magic, He jumped into cover.
"Whoa whoa whoa! I want to talk! Why so hostile?!" He shouted as they shot magic at him. One of the 'buggers' got lucky and hit him as he tried to peek out, knocking Josh's health down to 68."Damn it! Well, I tried to do it nicely...!" He popped out and shot one that was running towards him. Green blood spurted out of the bug-like pony, as bullets ripped it to pieces, like an 1000 degree knife through butter. That halted their attack for a moment, and that's all Josh needed. To him, this was easy mode, since they never took cover, and moved more predictably than the NPC's for a mario game. The battle raged on for a bit longer, and eventually they were all dead. Josh sighed, and looked at his health. 12. He'd gotten hit a lot more than he should have, but in his defense, shooting was like one of those VR games he never got used to. Josh took a closer look at the carnage he caused. The bodies of the buggers he killed lied on the badland ground, with more holes in them than they had previously. Green blood littered the ground, and he scoffed and no-clipped away. "Well, that was fun while it lasted..." Little did Josh know, he'd pissed off a lot of people that day.
He continued flying around, and looking for more things to kill, but he didn't find anything. Josh, now bored and a little tired, headed back to Ponyville. He thought back to the discussion he had with the ponies, and realized he may or may not have scared the ponies a bit. Human history isn't rainbows and sunshine, and it seemed to Josh, ponies didn't know much about violence. He sighed, cursing himself for not thinking things through. The sun was about to go down when he made it back to the town. Josh looked around and spotted a hill. He flew towards it, slowly and lazily heading closer to the ground. Josh stood on the hill, watching as the sun went down. A shadow of a smile was on his face. He always enjoyed sunsets, and for some reason Equestria's sunset made him even more happier than Earth's. The sun finally went down, and he sighed. Josh no-clipped back to the castle, heading in to sleep. It wasn't comfortable, the bed he made, because the mattress was old, and the bed was broke a bit. It didn't matter to him, he was just happy to sleep. Interesting to Josh his sleep was dreamless, a slight annoyance to him as he slept in darkness. What felt like literally twenty seconds to Josh, was apparently the entire night, and he wasn't too happy about that at all. He wanted to sleep more, but he knew once he was up, that was it. Josh was expecting a lot of things when he woke up and checked the cameras. He was not however, expecting an annoyed Celestia, the smaller blue one, and a shit load of guards, with pointy looking weapons. Josh could only think of two words to describe the situation he was in.
"Well...shit." Josh knew this could only end up poorly.
This is the last thing I'm writing because I just can't continue it. I want to, but well... with all the stuff going on in my life, I can't really do this. For real this time. I'm done, so if someone wants this, take it or, uh let it die or whatever. I mean, this wasn't a great idea to begin with since, I really can't write very well. Really sorry to do this. I had a lot of ideas that probably would have made this an.. okay story, but because I can't really ever find time to write, it's kind of useless you know? Anyways, I guess this is it huh? Again, really sorry about this. At least it was fun while it lasted right? No? Yes? I don't really know. Rambling like a idiot here. If anyone wants this, or wants to know what I intended, I'll let them know but, I can't continue this.