Pinkie Pie Has Infiltrated The Changelings' Secret Base!

by Estee

First published

"Infiltrated."

Because when her Pinkie Sense is going off and she just knows somepony's been denied the birthright which is their birthday celebration, she'll go anywhere and do anything to make it right. Even if anywhere means heading deep into a changeling hive, and anything is... well, anything!

But she'll do whatever it takes.

Birthdays are important.







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For A Given Value Of "Infiltrated."

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Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie!

...well, actually, I'm not. I guess technically, I'm sort of a... party invitation? With balloons. And glitter on it. But Twilight said that when somepony reads, it's as if the author is right there in the room -- or since there isn't actually any kind of room here, partially sticking out of a rockpile I found next to the cave entrance, and I'm pretty sure I placed it so that the last rays of Sun would glance off it just right. So if you're reading this, just pretend that I'm right here, talking to you, except that I'm made out of paper!

Did you know ponies could be made out of paper?

Actually, have we met before? Do you have any idea what I look like? Here, let me draw a little... okay, that's me! More or less, because I don't draw very well. But now when you pretend, imagine a lot of pink paper!

So I guess you're wondering why I'm sticking partway (and very strategically) out of this rockpile. Well, early today, I had a very special Pinkie Sense moment. It's something I've only had a couple of times before in my whole life, and whenever my tail springs forward, straightens out, and whips me in the face, I stop whatever I'm doing and go find out what's wrong, because that's the signal that somewhere, somepony just had a birthday and it's being completely ignored. That is just about the worst thing ever, after Nightmare and Discord and Cranky changing the locks on his house during the honeymoon and running out of flour. Can you imagine, being born, making it all the way out of not existing at all to feeling that first touch of Sun on your face and nopony cares? I can't ignore that! Nopony should, no matter how many ponies had to before it could happen at all!

I was actually writing out party invitations when it happened. (Did you guess that?) So when I galloped off to see just how somepony could be ignoring a birthday, I took them along without really thinking about it. And after I sort of homed in based on exactly which direction my tail kept trying to whip me from, I was outside this cave! Whoever's being denied their birthday is inside there, I just know it! And I'm going to fix everything! It's just that...

...it's really dark in there.

And it smells kind of bad.

You know that smell you get when the Cakes tell you asparagus is the worst pastry puff filling ever, only you want to find out for yourself so you make about five dozen and smuggle them into the middle of the tray, but then there's a lunch rush and everypony stays in Sugarcube Corner to eat and uses the bathroom before they go, and then you have to go clean the bathroom and you take a breath as you go through the door and that's when you find out why asparagus is the worst pastry puff filling ever? It's like that. Only a million times older. And it glows. Green. Green like asparagus, which is kind of thematically appropriate.

So the Cakes told me once that whenever you're going into someplace strange where odd things might happen, you should always tell somepony exactly where you went and when you think you'll be back, just in case somepony has to come looking for you! And Mrs. Cake said the same thing to a pony who was going into my bedroom, I don't know why... Anyway, they're right, because they're right about a lot of things so they're probably right about this too. Only it took me hours to get here, and if I go all the way back home, that birthday will be over and nopony will ever know somepony cared that they were born. I can't let that happen!

But then I remembered that I had my invitations with me!

So now you know where I went. And I guess I'll be back when the celebration is over, which would be sometime after I find the pony I'm celebrating with! Who's probably a really nice pony, who just doesn't get out much, who lives in a dark stinking cave which kind of glows green, and...

...you know what? I have more invitations! So I think I'd better take them in with me and keep writing, just in case anypony needs to know where I went next! Besides, I might even find somepony to invite, and it's very important to use the right methods, or at least that's what Dashie sort of implied after I asked some pegasi to spell out This Way To The Party! in the sky for her last birthday and they... did a really good job with the materials they had available, plus I'm sure her bedroom went back together the right way on the third attempt.

It's not a nice cave. You're probably thinking that right now, looking at it and wishing you could hold your breath longer too. Do you want to go in? I guess not. I really really don't even want to.

But I'm going inside now.

Birthdays are important.


So this just happened. I got inside the cave, and it -- just kept going. Further back, and down, and it sort of started to spiral. And then there were branch tunnels, and -- glow. This weird green glow runs in little trickles of liquid light all over the walls, only some of it runs up. As soon as Sun was out of sight, there was all this glow, enough to see by, and I just tried really really hard to remember exactly where I'd walked already because there was still an ignored birthday somewhere in here. But then there was this sound up ahead, which was sort of like if you took a couple of durian fruits and rubbed them against each other over and over, which sort of added something to the smell, and it sounded really familiar, I was trying to remember where I'd heard that before because I'm really better with visual stuff and then the changeling came around the corner.

He -- maybe it was a he? I only ever saw the one girl... anyway, he didn't see me, not right away. His head was down, and those single-color eyes he had, they were sort of, well, dim. His posture was really bad, he was totally dragging his hooves, and he just sort of looked like he was having the worst day ever, at least for somepony who wasn't having their birthday totally ignored.

I didn't move. I didn't want to gallop, because the sound would have gotten his attention, and I didn't want to teleport, because I don't know how, and I didn't want to fly, because low ceiling plus I'm not a pegasus so doing that is really really hard unless Twilight helps and then it's just really really plummety. I was kind of off to the side on the path he was trotting along, so I thought if I didn't move and stayed quiet, he'd just go past me.

Did you know changelings have really good peripheral vision? I didn't.

So his head turned, and came up just a little, and he said... well, it was sort of weird to hear one of them say anything. It was only Chrysalis who really talked before. And it wasn't Equestrian. It was a language, I know it was, because he was speaking and what happened after proved it was words. But there were hisses, like five teapots going off at once. Sometimes he'd rub his legs against each other and his little wings against his body, and it added these little clicks and hums, which when you put it all together, sounded like "Zi'res'ti zan'lsad'da te?" Only when you picture him saying it, have it be really really tired. And... sad.

I thought fast. I do that sometimes. And I told him to speak Equestrian!

He blinked at me. Their eyelids don't move right. He said "Ze'na?" I think he was confused.

I told him to speak Equestrian! Again! I was trying to practice my disguise! What good was a disguised changeling who couldn't even speak like a pony?

He blinked again in a really diagonal way, and then he said "Pony." I said yeah.

His head came up a little bit more, and it turned, only the wrong way, more like an ankle than a neck. And he said "Look like pony," and I nodded, and then he told me I sounded like a pony, and I tried to look really proud about that, and he was sure I smelled like a pony, and then he got really really close and I was thinking about trying to run past him when he rubbed me. His side against mine, and they're kind of cold. And rough. And you know the durian? Like that. Mixed with asparagus bathrooms, and everything else in there.

"Feel like pony," he said. "And no t'fin'zi."

Smiling that big starts to hurt my lips after a while.

"Good disguise," he told me. And then his head went down again, and he just put one hollow hoof in front of the other, and it was like it was all he wanted to do. Like it was the last thing he could do.

He was the saddest changeling in the world. He had to be, because he was the first one I'd ever seen who could be sad at all, except for maybe about Twilight hitting them with a field blast, all of those changelings might have been sort of sad, but only for a really short time. And he looked so sad that I just kind of -- blurted. Because when something's so obviously wrong, you kind of want to fix it, right? Even when the pony having the worst day ever is a changeling. So I asked him what was wrong. Who wouldn't?

He said "No one's singing." Only he said it like some ponies were talking when Nightmare Moon showed up, when they thought Sun would never come back, so I said I would sing if he wanted me to, and he said "No one's singing to her." And then those little wings buzzed, and he flew away.

I've never talked to a changeling before. Not like that.

Something's wrong.

Is it the birthday?


After we finished fighting the changelings that one time before the wedding, Twilight said it was weird how they all felt so -- dumb. Except for Chrysalis, who was also kind of dumb, only in a completely different way. But the ones who were trying to fight us didn't seem to think much. They'd all change to the same thing, at the same time, and they wouldn't talk when it would have made things more confusing if they just sounded like us too, and they just swarmed and crashed and acted like bugs going into a light and we were the light, only it wasn't a rainbow one because it was a wedding and the Elements really don't go with anything, which only makes Rarity cry when she thinks about it, which is mostly weekends. But anyway, Twilight said they were tactically bereft, which is how she talks sometimes when she doesn't want anyone to see how scary the thing we all just went through was, and she wondered how smart the ones who weren't Chrysalis really were. But we didn't know, because they never talked to us.

They're talking to me now, or at least a few of them did, the ones who talk at all. And they're... kind of dumb.

And really really sad.

The little ones, where the holes go all the way up their legs, with the dimmest eyes... they don't talk. They don't even really look at me. I stood right in front of one for what I think was a whole minute and he just kept pushing his stubby dull little horn into me like I was a curtain he was trying to walk through. They don't look at anything like they're really seeing it, except maybe the walls, and those they walk up, and when they reach those green trickles, they spit out this blue stuff and smear it around the edges with their hooves. They do that a lot. They don't seem to do anything except that. But I don't think they're really into it.

Then there's bigger ones. They mostly look like the ones who were in Canterlot. They see me, and it's like they would get mad if only they weren't so sad already, you can see these big slow thoughts coming together in their eyes until it all adds up to charging me, but that's so much time that I just tell them about practicing my disguise and sometimes I have to say it two or three or seven times, but then they lower their heads again and go back to being sad.

The biggest ones, who stand the straightest, where the holes are mostly at the bottom and the sort of horn hooks around a lot... they talk. Not much. And they think. Also not much. One of them wanted to know why I was practicing on this day of all days, he looked kind of offended, and then he looked suspicious and that scared me a little, so I started smiling again. And he said that it should have been a day of giving thanks instead of what it was because of what the queen had ordered. That there wasn't going to be any singing. And a changeling who dared --

-- their eyes narrow in from the wrong directions too --

-- to be practicing on this day, even one so skilled... maybe wasn't a changeling at all. Especially when it was someone who seemed too happy... and his head went down again.

I told him I'd just gotten back from a trip, which is what I told all the ones who could talk and wondered why I wasn't sad. And I was totally a changeling, I was just really dedicated to my disguise, like a proper changeling should be, since I was a changeling and a proper one.

He told me to prove it.

I told him that would break the disguise, ruin my practice, and where this happened, it wasn't just me and him. I probably should have mentioned this earlier. It was me and him and about twelve of the little ones and seven of the mediums and him, I know I said that already, but he was so big he should count for two. It really wasn't a good place to change back, because I couldn't. And I didn't know where to run. So I just waited to see what kind of proof he wanted.

So he said "What do we do with the ponies?" And I told him we wanted their love, and he asked what we did when we got their love and they were too used up to be good for anything any more.

And I thought about the wedding and I said we wanted to kill. I mean, I want to kill, only not really. I wanted to see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth, I mean, kill, kill, kill! And I started jumping up and down, yelling KILL, KILL, and he started jumping up and down with me, and we were both jumping up and down yelling "KILL! KILL!" and all the medium ones were chanting "KILL! KILL!" and the little ones were bouncing off the walls not yelling "KILL! KILL!" but they would have if they could until the big one stopped jumping. He said his name was Nd'wan and he ran his horn through my mane, said it was the best disguise he'd ever seen to go with the best Spy's Dance in hive history. I didn't feel too good about that, especially after he followed me down the next tunnel. He said he couldn't identify any trace of my t'fin'zi, but it was a big hive and the best spies could hide that too. He wanted to know where I'd been, and I said Ponyville, he didn't know where that was, so I told him all about the bakery and he was really proud of me for not vomiting all over the floor, but it was still in that sad way. So I tried asking what was wrong again, and just like all the others, he told me that no one was singing. I asked him why not.

He said "Because Queen Imaga ordered it." Like it was the worst thing which ever happened in any hive's history.

That sounded bad. I told him it was horrible. I thought he'd appreciate the sympathy.

He said "One Queen in a hive."

I nodded.

Then he told me that without new queens, there would be no new hives. And maybe each hive could only control so much, take so much, and kill so much (he was really sad about that last part), but the hives gave each other plenty of room, so when there was a chance for a new hive, it always had to be taken. But the Queen had said that her hive could grow bigger than any other, that they wouldn't need any new hives at all after hers was done because hers would be everywhere and everything. So she had ordered them not to sing. And because she's the Queen, they had to do it, or for this order, not do it. They didn't have any choice. But it was still wrong. He was just so sad about that, having to do something he knew was wrong. But he had to, because none of them had a choice, not when it was an order.

There would be no singing on her birthday.

And I started to figure out what was wrong.


Did you know changelings molt?

Sarge asked me if I needed to eco'nl'in ch'sm after forcing myself not to for so long since I'd been out there during the season exe'srae'e, and I said probably not but maybe I'd just feel like it if I had a moment. (Sarge is the really big changeling. He decided to practice a little himself, so he went to his pony name. He looked just like me for about five minutes, only twice as big and smelling like... all of it, plus rancid sweat from all the jumping. He told me he couldn't disguise smells yet.) So he took me to this really big pit which had... pieces of changeling in it. The outer pieces, all dried up and greyish and cracked. And he left me there, because eco'nl'in ch'sm is really really private.

The head pieces look really weird with no eyes in them. Like a graveyard without real bodies.

So I stared at the pieces for a while, and they stared back until I told them they'd won. And then I tried to jump into the pit while laughing about diving about like a dolphin and swimming like a seal before I balanced a shed horn on my snout and bounced it into the air, but I mostly just got really scratched up. But then I noticed something funny. Wherever the shed chitin was touching my scratches? They felt cool, and they didn't hurt so much any more. So I started searching around the pit, and I found a few pieces which were sort of my size and got my legs and torso and about half my head into them, so now instead of looking like a changeling pretending to be a pony pretending to be a changeling, I look like a changeling pretending to be a pony pretending to be a changeling who got stuck about halfway back and really really needed to eco'nl'in ch'sm already, which I think is a real improvement! And I went back to the tunnels.

For whoever's reading this: it's the one on the far right with the slightly less sickly green running along the walls.

I keep stopping to write and partially hide my invitations so ponies can follow me if they need to. I think it's safe. Even the ones who can speak Equestrian... I don't think any of them can read. Some of the trickles on the walls could almost look like letters, but none of them are allowed to run into each other, so there's no crossings or real curves. And I haven't seen anypony writing. They barely talk, and it makes it really quiet, it's easy to hide most of the time and write a little, but it's just so quiet and I don't have anypony to talk to. I want to talk to the changelings because Shining Armor's the only pony who's done a lot of it and he didn't know he was doing it. And they're -- just the only ponies around to talk to. But most of them don't talk at all, and usually when it's this quiet I'd sing, but nopony's supposed to be singing right now, so if anypony heard me...

I'm writing so everypony knows where I went. That's the right thing to do.

But maybe I'm also writing just so I can talk to someone.

I really really wish you could talk back.


My tail started whipping me again. Or it tried to. I kind of have a changeling's butt on top of my butt right now, and it's hard to whip through a double-butt. I wonder if that'll ever come up again?

So I was thinking that maybe everything wrong was close by. Because not only was my tail trying to whip, but the deeper I go, the quieter it gets. Like everything wrong is at the bottom and the closer the changelings are to it, the worse they feel. Not even the big ones are looking at me any more, and the only real sound is their breathing plus some little bugs on the walls, and it all sounds the same, like scuttling. I bet if you put it together with the clicks and wing movements and leg rubbing, it would turn into music! I think I'll take some of the moltings out with me and see if I can put them into my instruments. Can you imagine Lyra's face when I play with something nopony's ever seen before? Do you know who Lyra is? Are you Lyra? Hi, Lyra!

But then I walked past a door -- well, not really a door. The little ones -- they're called ree'krigs, I heard one of the middle-sized irritably telling them to get out of the way -- secrete this grey stuff that almost matches the color of the cave walls, except none of the trickles run across them. And when a changeling pushes at that stuff, they go through, and it snaps shut behind them. There was another big one in front of this -- membrane, I guess? And my tail tried to whip again. So I looked at him and said I had to go inside, and he didn't really look at anything except the floor before whispering and telling me or maybe reminding without thinking about it that no one was supposed to enter on orders of the queen, no one was supposed to get any closer than this, and he said it like he was telling me that the Nightmare was back and Sun had gone out. But my tail kept trying to whip and I just knew there was somepony behind that grey stuff who wasn't having a birthday because a meanie had said nopony was allowed to sing, and the changelings all knew that was the worst thing ever, and I was kind of starting to wonder if they were right, he was blocking my way only I knew he didn't want to and was only there because he'd been ordered and was big enough to give orders to anypony who wasn't the Queen, except I'm not part of the hive so he can't give me any orders and neither can she.

I thought about that for about two seconds, I looked around, I made sure there was nopony else around who could see us, and then I kicked him in the face.

It was really the best thing I could have done for him. I think he'll understand that when he wakes up.

I got my mouth around his horn and pulled through the membrane with me. He tastes a lot better than he smells. Like limes dipped in the inside of durian, which is a lot better than the outside! And once we were both inside, I turned around and I saw...

Here, I'll just draw it.

I bet you think that really just looks like a white log, right? Because that's what it was! Only wriggly! And alive! Those little gold knots (I only had the gold ink with me) are actually grey, and they're eyes! All ten of them! Even the ones along the first part of the back! And those twigs and leaves hanging down? I think those are legs, or at least when they wriggle, everything else moves. And it sort of pulled itself up so that I could see its mouth, which is a circle on the underside, and it wriggled some more, and it moved those feelers which you probably thought were branches because I really can't draw very well, and it said "Brrrffft," only in the saddest way I'd ever heard.

And I said "Happy birthday," because somepony already should have.

She (because I just knew it was a girl) said "Brrrffft?" again, but she sounded kind of curious this time. And she wriggled some more inside this big hexagon they had her in, the only occupied one in the thousands which lined the wall in that really huge cave, and she just looked so lonely.

She wriggled a little more, and got all the way to the front, but then she hit something clear and hard. Those feelers wriggled, and her whole body seemed sad. I got closer, right up to the front of my side for the clear wall, and the feelers ran over the section closest to me. They just kept doing that. Like she was trying to touch me. Like she'd never had anypony to touch at all.

So I sat down in front of her cell, and I sang to her.

I know lots of songs. I didn't get to use all of them, though. I sang her the one about giggling at the ghosties, and then I sang to her about smiling, then I remembered the one about Zecora, only when I started it I felt kind of ashamed about the words so I tried to change them in mid-stanza to something about Diamond Dogs, only I felt ashamed about that so I tried making it about changelings, but that felt all wrong too and I didn't even get a single line in before I just went back to smiling. Then we did a railroad work song, and one about being kind to other ponies, and I sang her a few birthday songs because nopony had, then some about making friends, and I tried to keep it soft, but those feelers kept wriggling and all her eyes were focused on me as she snuggled up against her side of the wall.

I just kept singing until it started to feel a little less sad in there, and I guess I forget that changelings might have been walking by outside who could hear me, especially on a day when nopony was supposed to sing at all, or at least I forget that until twelve of the big ones came in at the same time.

The nine who were still conscious after we finished are dragging me by my tail. They haven't noticed me writing. Or if they did, I don't think they understand what it is. I'm going to hide this invitation after we get around the next corner.

If you're still following me, I think we're going somewhere dangerous. Please get extra ponies before you follow my trail any more, if it's still there. A few of my chitin pieces fell off and they should be easy to spot, but I don't know if the ree'krigs have the janitor duties.


I would draw the Queen's chamber, but I don't have any green.

There's little pulsing things all over the walls, like drumskins somepony's pushing from the inside. The floor has ichor all over it, maybe because some of the Queen's pets drip it when they slime. They're huge bugs and they're everywhere, and some of them have more legs than every other bug I've seen in my whole life put together. There's a shallow pool of the green trickle liquid and every little trickle runs out from it. And the Queen is here. She looks exactly like Chrysalis, only smaller and thinner and her chitin is about twice as thick, plus her eyes are red and bulge a little. Plus her horn glows that same red all the time, like she's getting ready to cast at every second, and the energy drips instead of flowing. But other than that, they're twins.

The big ones are standing around me, but not in front of me, so she can see me.

She's watching me write, right in front of her. I wanted to see if she would notice, but she hasn't said anything to me yet, so I'm not sure she understands this either.

"Oh," she says. "Taking notes. How -- pony of you."

I think she noticed.

"Proceed," she says. "It's not as if anypony will read them, and I... don't care enough to find out how. It's a silly practice, when you think about it. The spoken word, along with the right t'fin'zi, gives orders. And that's what's important. Words and t'fin'zi, immediate and responded to. But written words... who can tell what you were really thinking at the time, presuming a pony who'd come this deep into a hive can think at all? Why, whoever read them could choose to interpret anything they wished, with no t'fin'zi at all..."

She looks at me for a few seconds. I stare right back at her. She blinks first. I don't think she's used to anypony staring back.

She's asking me why I'm here, only it's a lot more rude than that and came with a horn poke. I told her it was because somepony's birthday had been ignored, and she jumped backwards a little. I don't think anypony's ever been angry with her either. The big ones tried to ignore what she did, and so did she, but I saw it.

"I'm almost curious to find out what kind of damage you've done," she says. "Keep her away from learning songs, keep her away from changelings, keep her away from everything until she died from starvation and ignorance. One Queen to a hive -- but why would a proper Queen ever allow new hives? And here you've gone and given her pony songs. Almost curious, earth pony... but not quite curious enough. No other changelings will approach her, by my orders, much less sing. She'll starve in time. Just a little longer now, and still well before she would ever take her youngling form. She'll still die. All you did was -- prolong it."

She's looking right at me.

She looks hungry.

"Unless you've somehow decided you love her?" she asks. "No, that's too much to ask for, not to mention far too risky. But don't worry. We'll find out what you love... and then we'll eat it."

She's smiling. She's not very good at it. It almost doesn't look like a smile at all, and it feels all wrong.

"But there are other considerations," she says. "Like turning one catch into many. So... does anypony know you're here?"

I tell her no, nopony does. I don't know whether to hope I'm right or not. My friends would come for me, but if they got caught, then...

"Oh, please," she says, and she sniffs at me. One of her pets is crawling over her right wing. It's leaving a slime trail, and her energy drips carry most of it away. "Ponies are supposed to watch out for each other. I'm sure somepony will miss you, and when they come looking for you... well, maybe it'll give me enough to share, assuming I care enough. And if they're foolish enough to come with an army... you are a renewable resource."

I don't understand that, so I say so.

She tells me they can always get more ponies. Every Queen has to plan for a pony invasion, and when there's too many to capture, the easiest thing to do is bring down the hive on top of them. So there's dead ponies, but all the changelings live because only they know how to get out of a collapsing hive. And she can make the hive come down at any time. That's what the act'sti'li are for. And she laughs (only it's not the least bit funny) when she sees I don't know what that is, so she tells me they're the trickles. If she touches her horn into the pool, they'll start to corrode the walls, faster and faster. The changelings flee, the ponies die, and the Diarchy is that much weaker.

And that's what'll happen if my friends follow me in. I know it.

"So a few," she says, "are lunch. But too many -- are fun. Yes, it costs me my current hive, the greatest hive ever established and once I finish implementing my plans, the last. It may have taken so much work to burrow in here... but I can have my drones and workers and warriors do it all again for me."

She's coming closer. She looks at my invitation and sniffs again at the words. Her horn is dripping energy on my ink.

So I charge her, knock her off her hooves, and press her horn into the pool.


We're all running now! Only I'm running the wrong way!

All of the changelings are running past me! They're going through membranes, and some of those are set into the ceiling! I think those lead to the emergency exits! The Queen went through the first one, back in her chambers, and she didn't even try to go after me first: the act'sti'li started to give off sparks as soon as her horn touched the pool and I don't think she knows how to stop it, or she would have! The sparks were rushing down the walls even as she flew towards the ceiling, and all she did was curse me. A lot.

I'd write them down because I don't think anypony's ever heard those words before, but she was talking really fast and I don't know how to spell any of them.

But everypony else is racing up, and I'm galloping down. (I'm bowling a lot of them over as I go.) Because there's somepony who doesn't know how to get out, who doesn't know anything, and she's going to die in here. So all I have to do is follow the drag trail, break through that clear wall, and then I can get us through one of the emergency membranes and head for the surface, if I can just follow whatever tunnels are on the other side of the grey.

I don't know how I'm going to do it! I don't even know how I'm racing for the hexagon room while I'm still writing this! But I don't think anypony else can do it, because they're not supposed to get any closer than the front door! And if nopony else can help, that's when we're supposed to! That's what the Elements are for!

I really really wish I had a rainbow to blast that wall apart with right now!


We made it out!

I guess that's kind of obvious. I mean, if we didn't make it out, then who's writing this? It's not as if there's any such thing as ghosts, or at least that's what Rarity keeps saying no matter how many stories I try to tell her. And there aren't any changelings writing this, because they don't know how, plus they all scattered as soon as they got out. None of them stayed near what's left of the hive, which smells worse than ever, like everything from before was doused in hydrochloric acid. They just took off in all directions, like black buzzing dandelion fluff. I guess that's instincts, or orders. The sky was clear a few seconds after we got out, and we got out... a little later than I really really wanted to, but we got out, and now we're heading back.

So why am I still writing this? I wasn't sure just who I was writing it for while I was in there. The pony who might come looking for me, sure... but I didn't know who that was, and the deeper I got -- sometimes I had to try really hard to remember that somepony would look, even when I was scared about that happening. But now I know who I'm talking to, and that's why it took so long to get out, because I recovered every invitation I could along the way, and it turned out to be all of them. Somepony has to read them one day. After we teach her to read. Maybe Twilight can teach me how to -- well, teach, and then I'll teach the twins too! All three together.

Do you know where you are right now, while I'm writing this? You're on my back, which is only half chitin-covered right now, and that's not the half you decided to be on. You're warm and wriggly and not the least bit slimy, and you're watching everything I do. You love it when I sing to you, but you get confused when I stop so I can put the quill in my mouth and write more words down. Don't worry. You'll understand by the time you read this. You'd kind of have to, right?

I just told you that your name was Pupa, because I liked the sound of it. And you wriggled some more, and then you shimmered with this beautiful bright pink, and then guess what happened! You looked just like me!

Well, you looked like me if I'd looked just like that for my coat and mane colors when I was a foal and only said "Brrrffft?" in a really happy way. But only if I also had a thousand tiny legs and a couple of really cute feelers and my mouth on the underside.

It's okay. We'll work on it.