My Fall From Grace...
~The Curses of Reality~
As a foal, Faint Strike was always happy, and completely ignorant of the world around him. Though when he grew older and saw poverty, and anger, he grew curious and asked more of it. He found out that some ponies are just cruel, and some ponies are just unlucky. Growing older he grew used to knowing the suffering of others, but what he couldn't grow used to was of his own suffering. His parents would often fight a one sided fight, ending with the shouts of his father, which grew him to distance himself with his family of 5, his father, his mother, elder brother and sister, and himself. His brother and sister, while kind when he was young and foolish, grew to become personal bullies to him.
At school he was seen as completely friendly, being known with both nerds and athletes, colts and fillies, but something snapped. One day the year before his middle school, he grew cold, he grew to hate and distance himself with fillies, and always knock back at the joking arrogance of the athletes. He grew to often make cruel jokes towards the nerds while they remained friends with him.
Halfway through middle school, Faint Strike reached the boiling point. One day at home his mother was shouting at him, angry at something trivial and petty. He felt guilty, but then she kept going on and on about how other children were better than him, and of how she expects so much better out of him. He always hated being compared, and when she talked to him like he was dirt. He shouted back and lashed out, kicking things aside. At school he realized how much of a different person he had become, self-isolated, cruel, and sexist. Though he realized, it was because he knew too much, every person and situation he encountered had been analyzed and immediately judged. He saw in his fellow students, and even his friends such rudeness and arrogance towards impoverished, and such envy and jealousy towards each other, and Faint hated it. As much as he did it a few times, he realized it and wished so hard that he could change.
So he did the one thing that made sense in his almost broken mind, he ran, he tried with all his might and energy to run from his problems. He had made no conscious decision of where to go, but in his mind he was thinking of asking for help from the wisest ponies he knew of, the Princessess of Equestria.
All through the night Faint Strike ran, it took him half of it to reach the gates of the intimidating city of Canterlot. Though he managed to sneak past sleeping guards, which again convinced him more of how evil ponies were. Once he made it inside however, realization struck him. He had left his family and friends at home, he had left what he knew at home, and he had no money or shelter, other than at home. So he sucked it up for one cruel night, found a box and a place in an alley, and sobbed himself to sleep.
Faint Strike's dreams, however, were not normal, and neither should they ever be considered normal for a colt of his age. His dreams were ones of him writing down everything he knew, and burning it. Then would roll around in the fire, while it did nothing to harm him, other than him feeling absolute agony within. This was only one of the many things he dreamt of that night, all of it symbolizing the one thing he wanted now, to forget everything about how cruel and hopeless the world truly is.
Far from where a certain sobbing colt was sleeping, the two Alicorn sisters of day and night were busy enjoying some sibling time. That night Princess Celestia had randomly asked her younger sister, Princess Luna, what it was like to dreamwalk and banish nightmares. Instead of describing it, Luna decided to teach it to Celestia, which then turned out to be a really enjoyable and fun time for both of them. Celestia purposefully messed up a few times, and made some jokes on the basic dreams they encountered.
However, venturing farther in the dream realm, Luna sense malice and hate similar to one she knew of before, the Nightmare Miasma. She immediately alerted her sister to be vigilant, and to keep very close to her. Celestia obeyed, and realized that it was in fact, a serious situation, for she too could barely sense the malice. After a bit of dreamwalking they found the dream dimension which leaked self-hate, sadness, and near-insanity.
"Sister, I-I have only seen this once before, and we both know what had happened." Luna told Celestia, "But from what I can sense, this dream is a colt's, no older than 13. I cannot take a serious look at his memories, for we are in the dream realm, our power is lessened."
"I understand Luna, but is there really nothing we can't do?" asked Celestia, "It hurts being near this, and guilt will definitely be upon us if we leave it like this."
"We can go in and try to intervene, however we may well be stuck in there until the nightmare ends." explained Luna, to which her sister nodded and waited patiently for the dream princess to do her work.
After appearing inside the nightmare, they immediately took notice of their surroundings, they saw they were in a large empty room with ever-changing words splattered across the walls. Then they saw him, the victim of this nightmare, a colt of young age sobbing on the floor across the room. Though that wasn't the only thing, they could hear his thoughts, thinking of things colts like him shouldn't know, corruption, war, violence, crime, racism, and all the like.
Celestia approached first, shaking the colt to rouse him from his sobs.
"GO AWAY!" Faint shouted, "Just go away and leave me to die. Haa haa... I'm talking to myself, everything in this dream is a figment of my imagination, haa haa..."
Celestia moved back after his shout, but then overcame shock and this time took his hooves from his face and pushed them aside. His cries slowly came to a halt, then he wiped his eyes and opened them in curiosity. Then he noticed the two Princesses and reeled back in shock and confusion. He kept whispering no and shook his head, moving backwards ever-so-slowly.
"Haa haa... Because I was thinking of running to you guys for help, my brain has sent you here to torture me to? Call me names and tell me it will all be okay when it WON'T BE OKAY!?" Faint shouted in anger, "Get away from me you nightmarish whorses! Wake up, WAKE UP, WAKE UP!"
"ENOUGH!" shouted Luna in her royal voice, "Calm down colt, and know that we are in fact the true princesses, not created by this nightmare which we have endeavored to stop."
"Luna, you're scaring him even more, let me try. Hello there colt, what is your name?" Celestia asked him warmly
"M-my name is Faint Strike, a-and I ran away from home to ask advice from you two..." Faint explained, "N-now i'm sleeping in a box in some alleyway in Canterlot city. I was going to go to day court tomorrow..."
"Faint, we came here to rid your dream dimension of this nightmare, and that is what we shall do." Luna told him, we cannot spend too much time here so if you wish to speak with us more about your problems, come to day court or my current night court."
Faint Strike nodded and closed his eyes while Luna changed the landscape of his dream, and what it entailed. When he opened his eyes he saw a sight he had never seen before, after years of living in Manehattan, he was on a hill overlooking a vast grassy field. He noticed a shadow and realized be was under the shade of tree. However, what he didn't realize for the whole dream were the two missing diarchs.
Back at the Castle the two diarchs had awakened from their dreamwalk with solemn thoughts in their minds. They wondered who this colt was and how he was raised to nake him so resentful and fearful towards his world.
"Sister, did you feel it?" Asked Luna, "That wasn't it, but it felt so similar... I could feel and know his pain, I just couldn't understand why?"
"I felt it too, dear sister, and yes, it was not the Nightmare Miasma." replied Celestia, "I am certain that by day he shall come to us, and we may understand his troubles. If need be, we can help him re-situate himself in the world."
Celestia then nodded to her sister, hugged her, and left for some rest. Luna decided to return to her court in case anypony would come, although she doubted it as so far no one has since her return. Once she got to her recently built throne beside Celestia's, she found herself lost in thought, she was thinking on what she heard in that nightmare. Although it was true what she said to celestia about his memories, she could easily read his thoughts. She found herself on the topic of Equstria's innocence, on Equus' innocence, was it true? Was harmony really just a cover they put over their nation to shroud all its internal chaos? Was harmony really a tool Equestria used when their Princesses were threatened?
Apparently after Celestia's battle with Nightmare moon, she had stopped truly interfering with internal problems. Monsters were dealt with by mages and guards, and Celestia focused on keeping everything together and the task of the daily cycle. Luna wondered if this recedement of their caring and kindness is what caused Equestria to be so... so truly hopeless for the truly clear sighted. The fact that this colt saw Equestria for what it was as a whole, instead of what it is believed to be, shows wisdom far beyond his years. She was left in thought the whole night, until her sensing Celestia's magic signaled that she was to lower her moon. She walked from the throne room to her room's balcony, activated it's amplifier runes, and worked with her sister to bring day.
In a small box somewhere in Canterlot, a dirty young colt had awakened from his restless sleep. He decided to immediately follow the invitation or the princesses and ran to Canterlot Castle. The guards were alerted of the colts appearance before hand and let him through on orders of the princesses.
Upon reaching it's doors however, this guard hadn't let him in on account that 'the princesses are having their breakfasts' and to come back later. Faint tried to explain saying he was told to come as soon as possible, but the guard wouldn't budge.
"Guard, what is going on here?" a just bathed Celestia asked, "I have just finished readying myself and was heading to breakfast.
"Princess! I was just telling this colt here that you had only just awakened and were not opening day court, but he's not leaving." the guard explainsd, "He tried tricking me into believing he had gotten an invitation, but I know he's lying."
Celestia gave the guard a stern look, "Had I not alerted every guard to allow a dark blue fur and silver maned colt in to meet with me?" She interrogated, "Did you just accuse a poor young colt of lying, thinking he would do crime inside a castle full of guards?" The guard stammered to try answer, but he couldn't say anything out of nervosity. "You are dismissed, guard." Celetria told him. Celestia then shifted her attention to the young colt, whom she recognized from the nightmare, Faint Strike, and she smiled to him to calm his nerves. It helped only a little.
"H-hi I came here like you asked..." Faint told her, "I-im sorry that I'm a little bit dirty, b-but I didn't have time to find water to wash with."
"No, no, no, I cannot let you stay dirty." Celestia warmly decided, "Come now, we shall find a maid and have her assist you with cleaning yourself."
He blushed embarrassedly but agreed and followed her through the Castle halls. While on their trip, they came across Luna who was making her way to breakfast, or dinner in Luna's case. She widened her eyes briefly but then gave a curt nod in understanding and waved at Faint, to which he waved back and continued his journey. They eventually reached the royal bathroom that Luna and Celestia shared, and found two guards and a maid outside waiting for any duties, as is their job. Celestia greeted the guards, but told them to take a short break on her orders, to which they happily obliged.
"Miss Clean Eye, I have a new assignment for you." explained Celestia, "This colt his is filthy, and it pains me to see him as such."
"Oh, I guess I shall be helping him bathe?" asked Clean
"Uhm, not to be mean, but I can bathe myself." squeaked a red-faced Faint.
"Oh you two silly ponies." chuckled Celestia, "I meant Miss Clean will show you around the baths and deliver a towel and toiletries, as I must make my way to speak with Luna of some matters."
The revelation caused them all to laugh, the situation being such a silly and lighthearted one. Celestia then stroked Faint's mane in reassurance, and made her way to the dining room. Clean Eye then led the young colt into the bathroom, but when Faint saw it, it seemed more like a bath hall. A huge room with lots of steam in it, 4 large hot pools and decorative waterfalls.
"Well, just sink into one of the pools, and I'll bring you a bucket of soap and some other toiletries." Clean Eye said, "When you are done just knock on the door and I'll slide you the towel under the door, so you can have some privacy." Winking at the last part making Faint blush heavily.
One amazing bath later, and Clean Eye was making leading Faint Strike to the dining room. However again, when he entered it was huge. The princesses were at the table sitting beside each other, food on their plates but none of it touched, signaling that they hadn't eaten. They then noticed the duo, causing Clean Eye to bow and leave the room, but not before saying goodbye to the colt. Luna patted the seat beside her, and Faint approached slowly. Both their eyes were on him, watching his every move with interest, a mischievous glint in Celestia's.
When Faint Strike pulled out his chair and sat down, however he didn't notice the whoopee cushion and sat down quite roughly. *Brrrttttttttt* the sound of the artificial fart rang throughout the room, even the guards outside could hear it. Faint Strike became as red as a tomato, while the princesses were laughing their flanks off, and even the guards outside could be heard laughing. Luna then pulled him to her while still laughing, and petted his head while he just sat there all embarrassed. Eventually though they calmed down, and the guards and resumed their duties. Faint kicked away the whoopee cushion and saw in front of him a delectable plate of salads.
"We apologize for the joke, Faint Strike, but we were trying to lift your mood up just a bit." apologized Luna, "We didn't want you to treat us as high and mighty, and be all nervous through-out our little talks."
"Oh its okay, I actually thought it was a good prank." Faint Strike told them, "I kinda knew something was up from the look in Princess Celestia's eyes, but I just couldn't figure out what."
They then ate their breakfast, Faint Strike eating more than 1 plate of salads, more than 5 actually. However, they knew that Faint had not come here for idle chit chat and lazing around. While he ate, and bathed, he thought about the castle. 'The castle is so lavish, and grand, but I have seen houses it's complete opposite. he wondered. Although he knew it was tradition and culture, he couldn't help but question the morality of having poverty, and having this castle both within the same borders.
"Let's take this meeting to somewhere quiet shall we?" suggested Celestia, "Let's go to the Royal Library, there are some soft cushions there we can lay on to stay comfortable while we talk."
No one was against that decision, and so the trip was made. They walked quietly, Faint Strike in conflict with himself on what to think about the castle. Celestia and Luna both worried about what he had to say. They entered the library as the guards escorting them got to their positions to keep watch. The trio got settled, although Faint Strike sat down with a frown looking around at the huge library.
"Where do we begin?" he asked, still frowning.
He began by telling them of his life, he told them literally every single piece of detail he could remember. He told them the guilt he felt when being scolded by his parents, anger he felt when wrongly accused by others, and sadness he felt when seeing someone do something wrong on purpose. He spoke of how he really wishes to escape it all, but can only think of one way, taking his life... All throughout this tale, the princesses were raptly listening, thinking on every word he spoke, and every sentence they formed.
Throughout his retelling of his entire life, Celestia had indeed gotten maids and servants to bring them snacks every-so-often, and by the end the sun had moved far on the path Celestia had it on.
"I assume you are hungry, Faint Strike, as I doubt you would've had time to get yourself food." began Celestia, "How about all of us go and eat dinner? I am sure as the sun goes down, a meal would be much appreciated."
No one disagreed, so they all got up from their comfortable position, and proceeded to make their way towards the dining hall. Celestia gave a curt nod towards the guards as a signal that they were dismissed and to be replaced.
During their walk, no one spoke, all thinking on what was just said, and what it meant to them. Celestia and Luna worrying for the poor boy, as they believe he sees himself alone yet surrounded by people he knows. They resolved to remind him that if he just pushed on, and stayed determined to make his life better, it would all turn out well in the end. They approached the doors, and sat down waiting for everything to be set.
As everything was set, Celestia quietly spoke with Luna beside her, while Faint Strike sat wondering if he would be sent away. He sincerely felt alone, and felt really sad, despite all the kindness and openness the princesses showed. He wondered whether he should run into the Everfree Forest and let chaos do its worst unto him.
"Faint Strike? All the food is ready, you may begin eating if you wish." Celestia told him, to which he nodded and began eating, throwing all negative thoughts away. Following him were the two princesses, who enjoyed eating their food.
Though once all was finished, they decided to remain seated at the dinner hall, to speak upon the original matter at hand. Faint Strike sat there waiting for their final verdict, expecting a horrible fate.
"Faint Strike, we believe you are very lonely." Luna spoke to him, "We believe there is not much reassurance we can offer you, as we cannot affect the free will of our ponies. We do however, believe that there is one thing we can offer you, friendship. If you wish of it, we can send you to Ponyville, where the elements of harmony reside along with the Princess of Friendship, Twilight Sparkle. If there is anyone who can help you in your endeavor to run from your problems, it will be her."
Faint Strike was sat there dumbfounded, he wondered why they would offer this. Was he wrong that they would be busy and strained in resources and labourers? Are they not more important than to be wasting their times dealing with a whiny colt like him? All these thoughts ran through his mind until they were interrupted.
"Faint Strike, we are the princesses of Equestria. As such it is our duty to look over our little ponies and make sure everyone is happy. We must remember that we work for society as a whole, but society is made up of individuals." Celestia spoke in a warm tone, "You came to us seeking help, when it should've been us look for problems to fix. We never realized half of the things you said about the individuals of society."
Faint Strike was confused, and in his stupor, Celestia moved forward and pulled him towards her.
"Y-your hugging me?" Faint Strike whispered,
"Yes, to show you that you are cared, young one." Celestia whispered back, to which tears started pouring fresh from Faint Strikes eyes.
Way out of character, he pushed against Celestia shoving her away and pulled back. He ran out the door and towards the gates, wondering in his mind 'Why, why, why, why, why, why, why!?' The guards let him through unchallenged, and watched as he ran through the cities crowds, and out of Canterlot. The Princesses were at the balcony watching him, Celestia with a soft smile.
"Sister, are you sure he will be alright?" Luna worriedly asked,
"Yes, he knows what he can do, where he can go, and how he would do it. Even without our help, Ponyville is but a days walk, so reach it he shall." Celestia replied, "The faintest of light within a shadow, is enough to create a spark, which burns into a flame, which shall light back his soul and show him the way.
|Should you stumble, should you fall,
Know that you are not above all,
Neither better nor worse,
For life is a curse,
Make most of life for what it is,
Not what you want it to be.