A Horn Job, any way you Spell it

by Ponyess

First published

Pinkie Pie had stumbled upon a book, containing some very odd spells. Just holding the book made her excited; which made her go to her dear friend Twilight Sparkle, in order to explore what she thought the spells was meant for.

Pinkie Pie was going over the new books in Twilight’s library, as she stumbled on one particular book. As she noticed that it was a Book of Spells, or BoS; she quickly felt inclined to look closer, before forwarding the find to her dear friend; Twilight Sparkle.

As Twilight Sparkle tried out one particular spell, things started to slide out of the expected norm.

While Pinkie Pie was looking at images, one thing is leading to the next; this is when the Princess is thanking Celestia, she isn’t in open sight among Ponies, or Foals.

Pinkie Pie is obviously quick in taking advantage of the situation; bringing forth exciting exploration, as to what the spell could have been intended for and how it could best be put to use.

Her conclusion; a horny job?

An Episode, the Discovery of Discoveries: 1

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A new shipment of books had just arrived at the castle of Twilight Sparkle. Naturally, I had come to see if she had received any more of the interesting, fun books. She always gets new books, and a segment of these are very fun or interesting to read. These are what I had come to see, and read.

As an Earth Pony, I am supposed to ignore books on certain topics, like Arcane magic and pegasi flight. Now, why do I have to follow these instructions?


As the Party Pony; I go for anything and everything, I think is fun. Yet, I do follow a few tangents out on a limb and onto territories; I wasn’t expected to follow, or find anything worth my time. Why is that? Am I not capable, of enjoying a few odd to restricted subjects and topics?

Of course I love to read up on baking and cooking, and not just for Ponies; but also for Griffons and Diamond Dogs, not to mention Changelings.

Naturally; I do read up on the comedy, and the latest trends on jokes as well. Speaking of trends, I do read fashion and mystery as well. For some reason, I do find fashion particularly amusing; even if I can giggle away a few hours, while reading a mystery novel as well.


Just as the next Pony carried in a new trove of books, or should I have called it a Treasure trove; I picked up one from the top of the pile. Apparently, I had just trampled onto a doozy of a treasure.

“The shape of Magic, Forms of Potency” the title reads.

As I slipped of with my find; giggling all the while, as if I had been the insane filly who just escaped from the lunatic asylum. Thankfully, I had managed to cover my face long enough to be out of sight, and none hear me as I pull my hoof out of my muzzle.

“Ugh, I hate the taste of dust!” I exclaimed as I calmed down.

“The taste of dust?” Twilight Sparkle exclaimed, in confusion over my statement.

“I felt compelled to suck up my hoof in order not to let on what I thought, or how I felt as I snuck out with a new book out of your library!” I conceded.

“Okay? What book was that?” Twilight inquired; curious as to what had made me burst out of the library, with a hoof in my mouth.

“Just, just this little doozy of a riot!” I confessed, pushing the cover in her face.

“The shape of Magic, Forms of Potency!” Twilight reads, from the cover.

“It is pure Gold, as far as Comedy goes; but the interesting and exciting is what you will find, once you actually do read the book!” I explained.

“How in the name of Celestia and her Mother is a Book of Magic comedy to you?” she inquired, with critical voice and eyes squinted narrow.

“If I had been any other Earth Pony, you would have been quite right and spot on!” I clarified.

“Now you are confusing me on purpose. You are an Earth Pony; or are you denying that too, now?” she inquired.

“By definition, I am a Pony. I have no wings or horn; which makes me an Earth Pony, correct? No, I do not refute that!” I pointed out.

“Of course you are a Pony, and unless you are about to sprout wings, horn or both; you are still an Earth Pony!” she confirmed.

“There goes the baby foal boots. Since you have all been witnesses to it, you would know I need neither horn nor wings. Not so much because I don’t enjoy the applications of the arcane or flight; but I already know these by heart!” I concluded.

“If we go by implied magic, you would be either an Alicorn or a Changeling. Not sure I like where this line of reasoning is leading me off towards. Yet, I will try to follow you a few more minutes; just to make sure we are safe!” she responded.


“You recall the day when you came to Ponyville? The day we faced and opposed Nightmare Moon?” I pointed out.

“Yes, I do recall that day. It was a very exciting and hectic day for all of us!” she responded.

“Then you do recall how she repelled the three guards? She never once used her horn, when she used magic that day!” I prompted.

“Are you implying that she used Earth Pony magic, when she repelled those guards?” she offered.

“Is that so far fetched, when you look at how I use my mane and tail?” I concluded.

“Princess Celestia told us that all Ponies have magic, when Tirek was rampaging all over Equestria. I saw you fly in Canterlot, and since my friend Minuet was there and saw it; how could I doubt what I know I saw?” she responded.

“She did, but I guess she never told you the entire story!” I put forth.


“Now, to the matter at hoof. If you read the book, you would learn that the horn is more than a protrusion on the forehead of a Unicorn. The shape and structure of your horn is guiding and directing your magic, even if it is your potential, your skill and your personality that commonly set the limits to what and how much you can do with your magic!” I lectured her.

“You say that there are two opposing forces, determining what and how much I can do; magically speaking?” she inquired.

“These forces may be fractured, but that is essentially correct. Imagine what you could have done, if the shape of your horn had been different from what it is now?” I challenged her; with a serious, sly grin on my face.

“You say I could have been performing magic like Rarity, Celestia of Luna, if my horn had been like theirs?” she concluded; but doubting what she had just uttered, in words.

“Why is that so incredulous? The line of questioning may be more or less pointless, like a broken horn. What I had in mind, is to see if you could imagine something more complicated than merely duplicating another Ponies spells; I have already seen you doing that before. You do recall the time you found Rarity, down in the caves of the Diamond Dogs? Then you even raised the Sun, when Celestia was not available; even if she may have passed her potential over to you at the time!” I pointed out.

“If I am not to merely duplicate a spell of another Pony, then give me something juicy; something worthy of your test?” she returned.


“Page five. If you read that spell aloud for me; and I will give you something you can write to your old, former mentor Princess Celestia about; once you have seen what you can do!” I suggested, while the smile on my face widened further.

“Since it is you, Pinkie Pie. Knowing you already did read the book and thus recall every last word and arcane diagram, I can as well read it to you. Something I may not have done even to Rarity or Celestia, but here goes!” she put forth as she called forth the magic through her horn.

I could see the tip of her horn going alight, and the spark grow in intensity. Then, like an avalanche; the brilliant light of her magic flooded down the sides of her horn. The light continued to grow and intensify.

As she reached the point, a beam of light reached out and hit the book; thus flipping pages until she found the indicated page, whereupon she started to read the spell I had asked of her.

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A pronounced Spell: (2)

A pronounced Spell: 2

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I had just pronounced the words of a spell Pinkie Pie had placed right under my muzzle. Should I have refused? I trust in Pinkie Pie, like I trust in few to no other Ponies. It isn’t just in honesty, but her way of knowing what she was talking about in the first place. The way she had been leading me in a tight leach, guiding me to where she wanted the conversation to go.

The light at the tip of my horn remaining, the glow of my horn just as brilliant as before I concluded the reading of the spell. Yet, at first; nothing seems to happen. Just that the glow of my magic clings to my horn as if by its own accord. I don’t need to focus at all, it stays in place; ready to use at my slightest whim. Should I worry about this? There is the image of what Rarity did, when she had a spell that permitted her to manifest anything she could have imagined. Yet, if Pinkie Pie gave me the book; shouldn’t that make it safe?


“I have one small idea, just to verify that this spell is actually working; the way you made me think it should work!” I put forth.

“Okekey, dokeley!” she responded, with little to no further though of it.

This certainly isn’t the spell Rarity had manifested, but I felt like making a small test run; imagining a small, stubby little Unicorn horn in the forehead of Pinkie Pie. Just enough to see if it actually did work, in the first place.

“That is odd, Twilly; but thank you!” she prompted in response, and I saw the horn taking shape as I had imagined it.

“You are quite welcome, Pinkie Pie!” I responded, but promptly left the horn in place for now.

“If you close the doors to your chamber, and we can make a more interesting test!” she just blurted out, as she confirmed what I had just managed.


As my attention had been redirected from my friend Pinkie, she apparently had a surprise in store for me. As my eyes focused on her once more, I noticed something odd in the air before me; there is what I could only take for an image of something before me, and as I focused on it; the intended effect apparently is that my horn is taking on the shape and content of what I see before me.

Pinkie Pie is squinking, as she had referred to it; at some point way back. The image she is holding up before me; is clearly a sex toy, made out of a crystal clear and highly elastic rubber.

Before I had an instant; she was on me, licking my horn as if it had been a lollipop. What she told me; is that my magic is in effect a lubricant, but in telling me in this manner, she had effectively distracted me from both the spell and the image she had made me project; thus disconnecting me from what I am doing, and leaving the toy as my horn on my forehead.

While I am focusing magic through my horn; I can feel the sensation of touch, in a highly acute manner; yet I am not by any means prepared for the excitability or excitement she was now eliciting by licking the tip of my horn.

Of course, with the pronounced profile of the new, dual counterpoint spiral my horn is sporting; I am still capable of performing a good number of spells; even some of which I had not expected or was directly prepared to make use of. Besides, to her delight; all that made my horn into the tool of magic manipulation is still intact. Or is that an understatement I had not expected either?


“Pinkie Pie, why were you licking my horn?” I exclaimed.

“Because, I know you would find it exciting!” she prompted.

“Maybe so, but it is also extracting; like nothing else. Now, where were we?” I inquired, with just a hint more of irritation and agitation on my voice than I had intended, or felt comfortable showing off.

“Distracting? How about I give you something more exciting to think of, Twilly!” she proposed.

“When you put it that way, I really don’t want to know what you had in mind. If it had not been you; I would have found the statement threatening, to the point where I had to take a serious action in response!” I declared.

“Good thing I know nothing will happen; and that you will accept what I had in mind, once you see what I mean!” she prompted.

“The fact that you already know of it; is the first reason, why I will take no such action, but this may be the cause of the implied threat, as well. I guess I can as well let you have the candy, when you are so eager to have it?” I conceded in defeat.

“Thanks for seeing my point, and be so understanding, Twilly, You see, that candy is exactly what I had my eyes on!” she declared, winking in the direction of my horn.

“Uh, Pinkie? That is most certainly not candy, I doubt there has even been any sweet taste to it at any time!” I expressed.

“You know me better than that, Twilly. Now, if you could but bow down your head; you are a very tall Pony, these days!” she exclaimed.

“I guess you do have me on that last point, Pinkie; that is after all an effect of sprouting wings and ascending to Alicorn hood, and be coronated!” I gasped, as I did bow down my head and aimed my horn for her muzzle.

“Maybe this should get her quiet for a moment, and without making her whine about it all day?” I pondered.

Only this is when I recalled where Pinkie Pie had come from, a family of Rock farmers, who had rock soup for Hearth’s warming eve dinner. Yet, it is too late to retract; what I had already offered her.

Then another thought hit home, the spell she had prompted me to perform; aside how that had affected the horn in the process, maybe I could be safe after all?


I feel her lips, and her mouth contracted around the rubber currently representing my horn; with only the magic as lubrication between us. Feeling touch around my horn is a new and foreign sensation to me, but she made it exciting and enjoyable. Is this in Pinkie Pie, the spell itself; or was this simply hidden within me the entire time?

My horn is just as stiff and unfeeling as my hooves, most of the time; yet, with applied magic, she had made me experience something I had never expected. Indeed, something no Unicorn or Alicorn had been expecting to ever feel.

What came next is a shock and surprise; apparently just as much on Pinkie Pie as on me, going by how her eyes went up wide, as wide as they could ever go; The contraction of her lips could only be compared with how I feel when I came, but this should have been impossible. Even if it is Pinkie Pie I am dealing with here.

Of course, my horn is not the rigid and hard it used to be; but an elastic rubber that apparently is permitting me to feel and grow excited. Mere minutes after she came the first time; I came with her, and shot out a load of lubricating magic all the way down her throat.


Panting hard and fast; I pushed her off of my horn, just after I felt what had to be the climax.

Feeling her lips around my horn, tightly contracted until she was clear of my horn. Only a moment after her lips no longer is touching my horn, was she finally capable of parting her lips; which is when she gasped.

My horn is just as stiff and unfeeling as my hooves, most of the time; yet, with applied magic, she had made me experience something I had never expected. Indeed, something no Unicorn or Alicorn had been expecting to ever feel.

What came next is a shock and surprise; apparently just as much on Pinkie Pie as on me, going by how her eyes went up wide, as wide as they could ever go; The contraction of her lips could only be compared with how I feel when I came, but this should have been impossible. Even if it is Pinkie Pie I am dealing with here.

Of course, my horn is not the rigid and hard it used to be; but an elastic rubber that apparently is permitting me to feel and grow excited. Mere minutes after she came the first time; I came with her, and shot out a load of lubricating magic all the way down her throat.


Panting hard and fast; I pushed her off of my horn, just after I felt what had to be the climax.

Feeling her lips around my horn, tightly contracted until she was clear of my horn. Only a moment after her lips no longer is touching my horn, was she finally capable of parting her lips; which is when she gasped.

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