Would It Matter If You Did?

by Proper Noun

First published

Fluttershy has a philosophical question for Twilight Sparkle. Yes, "philosophical," that's the word...

Fluttershy has a philosophical - definitely philosophical - question for her best friend, Twilight Sparkle. She's certainly not testing any waters. None at all.

When you throw me, "Would It Matter...?", and "X Masturbates" in a blender, the result is... cute, apparently?
Prompted by a random conversation and pre-read by Samey90 and Cormac McCloppy.

Could it?

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Twilight Sparkle, the magical purple Alicorn of Friendship, gave her friend a flat stare.

"What."

Fluttershy smiled nervously, her soft yellow muzzle still burning and lit up as pink as her mane. Her wings were pulled tightly against her sides to prevent them from fluffing up in an embarrassing manner. She tried to answer, to repeat herself, but it came out as a timid squeak. After a moment of stammering, she averted her eyes to one of the many bookshelves that lined the walls of Twilight's castle library.

"Fluttershy, you can't be serious."

"I'm very serious," Fluttershy forced herself to say. Through a concerted and draining effort, she shoved her composure back into place, though it did nothing to cool her cheeks. Summoning another burst of courage, she met her friend's eyes again and squeaked out, "So, would it matter?"

"You're seriously asking me whether our friendship would change if I found out that you do... that." It wasn't a question, but Fluttershy answered anyway with a shaky nod. Total silence fell, assisted by the library's sound-proofing spell. Nothing from outside could be heard, and the two ponies were the only occupants of the enormous room. Well, there was also a changeling disguised as a book who was spying, but it wanted to be caught about as much as the bedbugs Fluttershy took care of wanted to run afoul of her Stare. It said and did nothing.

After almost a full minute, Twilight giggled.

"Wow, Fluttershy. I didn't realise you were that naive. I don't mean to make fun of you, of course. I just thought everypony would know. I'm glad you came to me, though—I'm happy to help!"

Fluttershy gulped as quietly as she could. "That doesn't answer my question."

"Sorry, sorry. Let me get back on track." Twilight coughed in a deliberate, dignified manner behind her right front hoof. "Fluttershy, everypony does it sometimes. Even Rarity, as difficult as that is to imagine."

Fluttershy held up her right front hoof, breaking in as politely as she could. "Really?"

"Of course! I, well..." Twilight's cheeks suddenly mirrored Fluttershy's pink blush, and her wings puffed up, flaring out a hoof's width on each side. She smiled sheepishly and forced them back into place. "Let's just say I was in a hurry and teleported to her place at an interesting time. I didn't see anything, of course, but I doubt she knew I could smell it, or she would have washed up more thoroughly before coming downstairs."

She could smell it? But only a stallion or... Fluttershy's mouth formed a silent oh. In a small voice, she said, "I wasn't sure you were gay, Twilight." The look she got in return was skeptical.

"Bisexual, actually. How could you not know? The Equestrian Bisexual Advocacy Organisation's flag is even based on the colours of my mane!"

"I thought that was a coincidence."

Twilight sighed and rubbed the base of her horn with her left front hoof. There was so much she could say, but most of it would distract from the important thing. She set her hoof back down, took a deep breath, and smiled her gentlest smile. "Anyway, Fluttershy, no. I absolutely would not think less of you. I already imagine everypony does it, and perhaps that you're even more private about it than most. You're one of my best friends, and you'd have to be a changeling or something to even begin to change that."

Fluttershy smiled awkwardly. Beneath her pretended confidence, her thoughts were racing with doubts. If it didn't matter—

"You're not a changeling, right?" Concern cut at the edge of Twilight's voice. "Fluttershy, if this is about that conversation we had after the invasion—"

"Oh goodness no! Nothing like that at all!" Fluttershy blurted. Then, she hid as much of her face behind her mane as she could, and whimpered, "SorryIdidn'tmeantointerruptyou!"

The pegasus's heart was beating nearly as quickly as her thoughts were trying to discourage her. It had taken months and two separate anti-changeling screenings to finally escape suspicion after that argument. She could still feel Twilight's spell knocking her off her hooves whenever she thought about it, but this wasn't about that.

"Oh, it's fine," Twilight said. She waved a hoof dismissively, but her tail's irritated flick told the real story. "But if this isn't about that, then what is it?"

Fluttershy opened her mouth, and willed the words to come out. They wouldn't. She shut her mouth, then tried again, and managed to squeak out an answer, though she had to hide even further behind her mane and look at the floor to do so.

"Would—Would it matter if... somepony I know...?"

"You mean when you...?"

Fluttershy nodded. The pink had never quite faded from her muzzle, and now it was back in full force. For her part, Twilight blinked. She hadn't seen that coming. Her leading hypothesis was—had been—that the pegasus was more interested in all the animals she cared for than other ponies. It was a relief to know she wouldn't be forced, by her jurisdiction, to judge one of her friends in a criminal case of that nature.

"Well, that's certainly not what I was expecting!" Twilight said, too loudly. Dropping back to a gentler tone, she continued, "I suppose that wouldn't matter either, though I hope you're planning to tell that pony. It is a little bit creepy to do that and say nothing."

Fluttershy grimaced.

"Sooo, who's the lucky stallion?" Twilight asked. The alicorn's sudden, conspiratory smile did nothing to help her friend's nerves. Still, the pegasus was able to swallow the knot in her throat after a moment's struggle.

"Well, umm..." It was now or never, Fluttershy realised. That thought just made it harder to push the words out, but with months of intent at her back, she was able to steel herself and look Twilight in the eyes.

"Twilight, would it matter if I had an evening free for dinner this weekend?"