It's Heavy
"Princess Celestia? You wanted to see me?"
Celestia was snapped out of her thoughts by the call of Twilight Sparkle, her faithful student. Breathing a deep sigh, she called "Yes, Twilight. Come in."
Twilight entered the room to see her mentor standing at one of the floor-to-ceiling length windows that overlooked her kingdom. Celestia's eyes seemed distant, as though she was drifting between reality and illusion.
"Princess? Are you ok?" Twilight asked urgently. Celestia was once again snapped away from her thoughts and she sighed.
"I'm sorry, Twilight. I was just...thinking." The white Alicorn murmured before heading to the giant doors. Twilight followed after her.
"Twilight, do you know what it means to be a Princess?"
Twilight bit her lip. She was expecting a talk, but....not a lesson. "It means you must care for your subjects and your kingdom, right?"
"Yes. You must care for your subjects." Celestia stopped and looked down at her. "Even if it means you must hurt some of them."
Twilight's eyes widened. Hurt her subjects? They weren't going to... She wouldn't have to...
Celestia chuckled at the look on Twilight's face. "Hopefully, you will never have to do that, Twilight. But..." Her smile fell from her face. "..I once had to."
Twilight felt her legs give way, and collapsed on something soft. She found they had walked right into a room with pillows lined upon the floor, and a blazing fireplace.
"Once, Twilight Sparkle, there was a little town, close to Canterlot." Celestia said, lying down on her own pile of pillows. "A small town of which I cannot speak the name of. You see, it was a town filled with violence, drugs and many other crimes. But I did not know of the town at the time."
"But, you see, my niece did."
"You mean Cadence?" Twilight's eyes widened until her pupils were pin pricks.
Celestia smiled sadly. "No. I had another niece. Sunlight, was her name. She had a white coat, like me, and a blonde mane and tail. She was beautiful in every way."
"She knew all about the town, so, while i was away, she would sneak out to it and meet some ponies she called 'friends'. I called them criminals. We...had an argument when i found out about them." Celestia sighed, and her eyes drifted from Twilight's.
"She said 'I'll bring them here, and PROVE to you they're good!' And so she did. She brought all 10 of her 'friends' from that small town to the palace, and you know what they did?"
"What...what did they do?" Twilight whispered, mesmerised, shocked and frightened.
"Why, they trashed the castle, ate all the food, then took off with some jewels and other precious items!" Celestia laughed, but it was full of rage and disgust. "Luna went ballistic when she found out they'd stolen her Playcolt Console!"
Twilight giggled for a bit, but then her face went back into a serious expression. "What did you do?"
"Well, first I sent the guards after the ponies to retrieve the goods, and then I banned Sunlight from ever going to the town again. She was quite mad, and stormed out of the castle."
"For a few weeks, she went missing. I sent every guard around Equestria to find her, but she was nowhere. I spent my nights tossing and turning. Was she locked up somewhere? Injured? Was somepony doing something horrible to her? I hadn't a clue." Celestia smiled, and tears formed in her eyes. "But I needn't have worried."
"Why?" Twilight was now captivated by the Princess's story.
"She had gone back to the town and gathered up the residents, including her friends. And then they tormented Equestria. They stole, murdered, kidnapped, tortured, assaulted physically, sexually and mentally." Celestia was now letting tears drip out of her eyes. "They committed so many crimes it horrified me. And my niece also committed them."
"Naturally, after they did all this, they stormed Canterlot, destroying it completely. Then they charged the castle and attempted to murder me."
Twilight gasped and hit the ground, and she noticed with a blushing face she had been leaning in too far. "So...What happened next?"
Well, I cast a spell that made them all collapse, and then threw them in cells. I then went around Equestria with my sister making everypony forget this ever happened." Celestia muttered, staring hard into the fire. "Then, I confronted the criminals."
"They scowled, they jeered at me, they said things that would make anypony curl up and cry. When I spoke to Sunlight, she just turned her back on me and said 'I hate you. I hate you, and I'm glad I did those things to all your subjects. I hope you suffer.'"
Twilight felt sick. "What did you....are they...."
Celestia looked straight at Twilight. "No, Twilight. They are no longer in the cells, because they're dead. I executed them."
Twilight began to shake. The Princess killed all those ponies? The Princess killed her own niece? How could-
"I KNOW, Twilight!!" Celestia yelled, startling the lavender alicorn. "I KNOW I'm a monster! I KNOW what you're thinking of me right now! But think about how I felt!! I had to watch my own subjects be killed! I had to watch my own NIECE be killed! Have...Have you ever felt the pain of looking straight into your niece's eyes, and knowing she thinks you're a monster? Have you, Twilight Sparkle?" Celestia's voice was only a whisper now.
Twilight shook her head furiously, not wanting to upset her anymore.
Celestia collapsed onto the pillows, buried her head in her hooves, and cried. Tears flowed past her hooves and onto the pillows, drenching them.
Twilight didn't- no, COULDNT -say anything. When she tried to put a hoof on her mentor's shoulder, she found herself buried in a hug. Unsure of what to do now, she patted her mentor's back and looked around awkwardly.
Eventually, the hooves wrapped around her relaxed and she was looking into Celestia's eyes again.
"I-I'm sorry for...breaking down like that." Celestia murmured, levitating a tissue to her eyes and wiping them. "But...I hope you've learned something today."
"Um...Never let your niece near a bad town?" Twilight suggested, preparing herself.
Instead of getting bucked to the moon, Celestia laughed. "You are a riot, Twilight. Now." She smiled and led Twilight out of the room and down the hall. "How about a snack?"
* * *
It was pouring down with rain in the graveyard. There was nopony to be seen, except for the occasional passer-by near the gates.
A figure suddenly emerged from the shadows, tall and strong, with wings and a horn. The figure's usually flowing mane and tail were now being dragged across the ground, wet from the rain. The figure stopped in front of a small grave on top of a hill, and bowed it's head low. Lightning flashed, and Celestia's face filled with fright when a voice rang out behind her.
"I see you still visit her grave, sister."
Celestia turned around, and saw Luna approaching her, levitating two umbrella's. Celestia grabbed one with her magic and murmured "Thank you."
"Why did you not add 'Part of the Equestria Massacre' onto her grave? Are you still trying to make everypony forget what happened?" Luna asked, glancing at her older sister.
"The things they did are unacceptable, Luna." Celestia hissed, raising her head to the sky, letting the rain wash over her. "I still hate myself for what I did to her, but the things that happened to those innocent victims...the things those ponies did..."
"You mean the things-"
"No." Celestia turned her head away, not facing Luna.
There was silence. "I heard you telling the story to Twilight today."
Celestia said nothing to her sister.
"When are you going to tell her that the niece was actually you?"
Luna's question rang in Celestia's ears. The white alicorn sighed.
"She'll be ready when she is older. I already know you think I'm a monster. I don't need Twilight thinking I am one too."
The silence came again, and Celestia spent a long time staring at the grave. Eventually, she looked around. She was once again alone. Luna had left.
Sighing, she turned and made her way home, but not before taking one last glance at the words engraved on the stone.
PRINCESS SUNLIGHT
Loving aunt to Princess Celestia and Luna
Died 1958
You will forever be missed
* * *
When Celestia finally reached her room, she heard a loud smash from the one behind her. Rushing in, she found Twilight standing there, her eyes wide, shaking, tears streaming down her cheeks. A shattered glass lay at her hooves.
"You...You lied to me." Twilight whispered, backing away slightly from Celestia. "It was you. Sunlight was the aunt. You put a spell on them and they thought she did it."
Celestia thought she saw a blue body drift out of the room behind her.
"Twilight...Twilight, please-"
Twilight tripped, and banged into a close labelled 'Celestia's'. The door opened and an item fell to the floor.
Twilight stared at the item, gasped, and burst into tears, running out of the room. Celestia didn't even bother chasing after her. Instead, she stared at the item.
She had done many terrible things in her time as a teenager. Her aunt had died because of it. Could she keep going anymore, living with this guilt and disgust with herself?
It didn't matter. She was going to Tartarus anyway.
Celestia picked up the rope lying at her hooves.
End