Chapter 1: The Day The Universe Became A Butthole (Edited)

My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 1: The Day The Universe Became A Butthole

Hey guys, my name’s John White, and I am stuck in Equestria. I’m also stuck in the form of Princess Luna. Why? Because reasons. Reasons that the universe isn’t going to give me any time soon because it’s really being a major butthole right now, as if it wasn’t being a butthole before.

So I just want to drop a few quick things about myself before I forget anything. I’m a college student, I study criminal law in college, and I’m a brony. I started watching MLP right in the middle of the third season and I kind of liked it. Although, nowadays I’m pretty much into fandom material, like comics, fanfics, all that stuff.

To go along with me being a brony, I have quite the imagination when it comes to the stories that the fandom tells. Like, I kind of put myself in their world as I see it so to say, as I’m sure that like, 75% of you guys do this all the time.

That being said, I should probably explain my situation from the beginning, which would be the day before the night I got stuck here. I’m not even sure if I was saying that right, but the point still stands. Anyway, moving on.

My day started out pretty nicely. The starting lyrics from the song, “Friday” by Rebecca Black, as much as I hate that song, seemed to pretty much sum up my morning, to the point before the bridge. Except that one of my friends actually called me and said that he gathered up the crew so we could hang out for a little bit.

I had quite the group of friends, pretty good ones at that. I met the first one of our group a few years back when I was in high school. We became good friends during that time and we even made a few new ones as time went on. Eventually, we pretty much became like a crew so to say, at least that’s how I see it.

Anyways, my friend calls me and I pick up. “Hey, what’s up Simmons?” I greeted.

“Hey John, what’cha doing right now?” Simmons asked. For those of you who haven’t figured it out yet, Simmons is actually my first friend.

“Nothing much, honestly.” I replied. “Just got finished with breakfast.”

“Oh, cool. Well, if you aren’t busy with anything, I’m about to get the crew together so we can hang out somewhere. You wanna come?” Simmons offered.

“Sure, why not, I ain’t got much to do anyway.” I responded. “We meeting at the usual spot?”
“Yeah, I’ll let Josh know.” Simmons confirmed. “See you at 10.”

“Yeah, seeya, bye.” I said as I hung up.

It was around 8:30 AM when I hung up, so I had plenty of time to myself before getting ready. In the meantime, I went to my bedroom and got on my laptop just to look up some MLP content, you know, the usual stuff. I was mainly looking at the fanfics for something good, but didn’t really find anything of interest. So, I decided to continue reading the fics I was already reading.

I was at this for most of the time until it turned to 9:35 AM on the clock. I took a quick shower before putting on my usual attire and then I was all set. I got in my car and started heading to the “usual spot”.

The “usual spot” was pretty much at the local diner where Josh, one of my other friends, works at. You know, one of those old diners that you kind of see in some old movies? Yeah, that’s pretty much where we go most of the time. Except that the diner has kind of an underground lounge with a bunch awesome stuff like a pool table, a bar, a game room, it even has a shooting range, which I was very grateful for. There was also some other stuff around but I won’t go into further details.

I left the house around 9:50 AM and got to the diner at like 10:12 AM-ish. By the way, in my college, I kind of rented a small house rather than sleeping in the dorms. Sleeping in the dorms just didn’t set right with me. I had enough money to rent it, but it would have had me save a bit more money for food and bills. Luckily, when renting the house, I had some financial support from a couple of my friends to help me save some money. But I’m getting off-topic, back to what I was saying.

When I got to the lounge, most of my friends were already there. Let me list them off; there’s Simmons, Josh, Aaron, Noah, Ken, Mason, Kate, and Jessa. I found them just chilling out at the….circle couch? I didn’t really know what it was called but you get what I mean.

I should probably tell you guys a little bit about my friends, you know, just to get to know them.

First one is my best friend, Simmons, his real name is Richard Simmons but he likes to be called Simmons. Like I said, Simmons was the first one of our group that I've met since my sophomore year in high school. I met him in my Criminology class during second semester and he too was a sophomore but we didn't really talk much in the beginning. When our teacher put us in pairs for some assignment that had to be done at home, me and him were partners. Fortunately for us, we lived pretty close to each other at the time, so we helped each other out at our houses. We started to socialize a bit and we realized we had a lot of things in common. Some of which was that we were both studying law, both had some creativity, and we were both Bronies. We were pretty much on the same page and I kind of thought of ourselves kind of like brothers. After the assignment, we were hanging out a lot and became best friends. By the way, in our group, I'm basically the leader since I kind of founded it, I'm also the reasonable guy while Simmons is pretty much the smart guy. So, time went by a little bit and we met the next two members of our group.

Next up would be Mason West and Aaron Woods, both were at our grade. Mason is pretty much the joker of the group since he kind of, for his title's sake, plays a bunch of jokes and just plain has fun with everybody. You could say he would be the life of the party when we have some. With Aaron, he's pretty much a tech nerd, although he doesn't really look like a nerd he just looks like your average college student wanting to have some fun. Mason was Simmons' friend before he met me, Simmons introduced me to him and we got along pretty nicely. I actually met Aaron trying to mess with one of the laptops the school gave him, a few days after the school put a filter block on the laptops themselves. Usually the filter block would be at school, but at this time, the school blocked certain websites on the laptops themselves for whatever reason. Basically it meant that you couldn't access certain websites even if you're at home. This put a lot of students off, including the friends me and Simmons had at the time. My reaction to it was pretty much trying to bypass it through internet means, but the school was clever by even blocking the un-block proxy websites. Although, I don't know if they even worked in the first place, but whatever, back to Aaron. Basically he was complaining that now he can't go on DeviantArt or Fimfiction with the filter block in place. At the mention of Fimfiction, I knew he was a brony. Just for the heck of it, I kind of invited him to our group, and he was okay with it. Nowadays, he kind of helps us out with technological problems. We all stuck together till I met our next member during the second half of our junior year.

Next would be Josh, Josh Lopez. Josh is actually one of my cousins. Don't ask me how we're related, because I don't know it all myself. All I know from my parents is that we're pretty much cousins. I actually remember a little bit about him from my childhood, but I didn't know him very well since he lives pretty far away compared to my other cousins. When I was a little kid, I rarely saw his family, I only saw him at certain family events but that was it, I never really knew him until his parents moved somewhere around my neighborhood and enrolled him to my school. Josh was pretty much a shy(ish) person. When I met up with him at school, he was pretty okay with me, but he said he was a bit scared to make some new friends. So, I kind of welcomed him to our circle and he liked it. After some time, we met the last three members of our group over the course of our summer vacation.

The last ones were Ken and Kate Evans and Jessa Rodriguez. Ken and Kate are brother and sister, although they didn't really look like twins, by twins I mean identical twins, so no they weren't that, but they were brother and sister none the less. Me, Simmons, and Mason met Ken and Kate at a local bowling alley and asked if we would go against them in a friendly competition. Naturally we agreed to go against them as me and Mason both had competitive attitudes. Although, Simmons didn't really want to play along with us, so he decided to just spectate. So, we were going on separate lanes, whichever team had the most points at the end of the round wins. The match went on for a little bit and it was really close, but in the end, Ken and Kate won the game. We congratulated them and asked if they wanted to be friends with us, they said yes. A few days later, we met Jessa. Jessa was pretty much Kate's friend before they met us. Kate introduced us to her we got along fine.

That pretty much sums up our story, but back to my story.

“Hey, wassup peoples?” I called out.

“HEY, yo wassup John?”

“Eeey, how’s it goin’”

“Hi, John”

Everyone greeted me, and it seemed everyone was here, except for one.

“Hey, where’s Hannah?” I inquired.

Yeah, I forgot about Hannah. Hannah Edwards was her real name. Hannah, I should say, is pretty much a socially-awkward nerdy bookworm; in other words, a real life Twilight Sparkle. I couldn't really believe what I was seeing when I first met her. So, our group, being in the same grade, eventually came to age for college. We were having it easy for the first couple of weeks, but then some of us hit a block in our stuff so we had to hit the books to keep up. A few days into our intensive studies, I came across a Twilight-Sparkle-lover's sight to behold, I saw a young girl not over a year older than us, sitting there at the table, with a freaking stack of books on both the left and right sides of the table. To top it all off, she even had the nerdy look down, although she didn't really look like Twilight Sparkle herself. She pretty much had the sweater and glasses of Moondancer, her hair was tied up in a pony tail rather than a bow like Moondancer, and she even had the look as if she was trying to solve the mystery of the Elements of Harmony, even though she wasn't really into the Brony fandom at the time. When I got a good look at her I just went like: "No way!". I kid you not, she was a literal Season 1 Twilight Sparkle over here. I could not in good conscience let her become another Moondancer. So, I intervened in her "eternal crusade" for knowledge in.... whatever she was studying at the time. My goal was to show her the light of friendship and get her face out of the books. She was stubborn to get off at first, but I finally convinced her to tear away from the books. I decided to take it a step farther and asked if I could show her something. She reluctantly agreed. First, I asked her if she knew any thing about MLP:FIM, she said she only knew a little bit. She also said was curious with it at first but her studies drove that interest away. I then began to show her the MLP episode, "Amending Fences". Afterwards, I explained that she needs to get some friends or she would end up like Moondancer for the first half of her showing. She then explained that she never wanted friends until now, she never thought herself being so cynical to those around her like Moondancer. After watching the episode, Hannah Edwards has seen the light of friendship. She still a nerdy bookworm, but nowadays, not so much. And now, she's late

“Dunno, we’re still waiting for her.” Mason answered. “She said she was coming.”

That was when I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. I look back and see Hannah walking to where we are.

“Hi guys, sorry I’m late. I had some stuff to do at the library.” she said.

“Eh, no need to be sorry, we're glad you’re here.” I said dismissively as I took my seat.

“So, what are we gonna do guys?” Aaron asked.

“Well first of all, me and John have a score to settle from the last time we had a 1v1 match on Black Ops 2.” Mason said in a cocky manner. “You see, after that dick move you pulled on that match, I’ve been testing myself against those kinds of tricks. I know your moves now, I’m so gonna beat you.”

“Oh really now?” I replied smugly. “I don’t think you saw all I have up my sleeve.”

“We’ll see about that, 1v1 me bro, right now!” Mason exclaimed, standing up from his seat trying to intimidate me.

“Okay, let’s go bro, let’s go!” I said getting up from my seat too, pounding my chest as I started towards the game room, Mason following close, maintaining his intimidating glare.

Back with the group, they were discussing what they were going to do. After a few minutes, they split up to do their own thing. Me and Mason were already starting our intense duel.

For a few minutes, we decided to go quickscoping against each other and were going at it like crazy, throwing out insults after every other kill and fake accusations claiming we hack or something, even though we were playing local. After a while, we didn’t even know what we were doing anymore other than just playing around like a bunch of idiots.

At that point, you could think of this as one of those mlg montage parodies that go all over the top and stupid. At least, that was what was going through our heads.

After that little fiasco, it was already like 2:45 PM. Everybody apparently came back for whatever reason. We then just did whatever we wanted around the lounge for a couple of hours, after that, there wasn’t much to do anymore.

I walked towards the group all chilling out at the couch with a few drinks on the table. “So, what else are we going to do, huh?” I asked.

“I got nothing.” Noah grumbled

“Me neither.” said Ken

“Same.” echoed Kate

I thought for a second, then a thought came to me. “I got an idea.” I beamed.

“What is it?” inquired Simmons.

“Who’s up for a couple rounds at a nearby Laser Tag arena?” I offered.

I looked around seeing everyone nodding and shrugging, seeing as they had nothing else better to do.

“Alright, I’m cool with that.” Simmons responded.

“Great, so it’s decided? Good, let’s go.” I cheered as I walked out of the lounge with the others behind me.

So it took us a little bit to get to the Laser Tag place, but we got there just fine. When we arrived, we all signed in and got ready to play. We were in there for quite a while before we decided to go get dinner then hit the hay, it was around 8:45 after all.

So, when I got home, I just decided to settle down a little bit and just chill out on my laptop. I stayed on it only for a little bit, then I started to get sleepy.

I yawned. “Whew, that Laser Tag session took a lot out of me, I’m so tired. Meh, time to go to bed.” I said to myself.

I climbed in bed, tucked myself in, and then close my eyes as I slowly drifted into my own thoughts. My dream was pretty much normal-ish, nothing worth mentioning. After that, three guesses as to what happened next. Yep, as I’ve said before, I became Princess Luna, for no apparent reason whatsoever. So here’s how I saw it.

I was pretty much swaying between consciousness for a little bit as I wanted to sleep a little more. My eyes were fluttering as they were slowly opening, then they closed again, failing to notice the dark blue foreleg in front of me. I then tried to wake up as I was grumbling myself awake so to say. It was then I noticed the feminine tone in my voice. Surprised, my eyes shot open, and lo and behold, I see two dark blue forelegs stretched out in front of me with an addition of hooves.

I gasp in fear. “What the heck is-*meep*!” I blurted before quickly covering my mouth, shocked at the change in my voice. “What the heck happened to my voice!?!?” I asked myself. Looking at my…. arms I would say right now, it could only mean one thing. I flipped over the covers, hoping I was wrong and this was all a dream, and what I saw only confirmed my suspicions, I was in a body of a pony. I looked at a nearby mirror and realized that I wasn’t just anypony, I was in the form of Princess Luna herself.

“What the heck is going on here?!?” I whispered to myself beginning to panic as I began to observe myself.

I looked like her in every little physical detail, from her colors, her wings and horn, her cutie mark, everything. I was really her. At this point, I began to hyperventilate, trying to resist the urge to scream. But at the very moment I was all the way up to that point, I held my breath trying to hold back my scream as I realized where I am, I was in Princess Luna’s room, in Canterlot, in Equestria. I figured that if I screamed, it would only raise suspicion. Somepony would come in here and ask what happened and I would have to make up a lie that they would supposedly dismiss and then figure out that I’m not Princess Luna and who knows what would happen next. I do NOT want to go through that. I watched many similar cases to know what could happen.

So, I let my breath go and took deep breaths to calm myself down. As I was doing so, I began to observe the room thoroughly. The walls of the room were a nightly blue color with painted clouds decorating said wall. There was a fireplace on the right side of the room that had no fire burning in it currently. Next to me was the bed I woke up in, which was a four post bed adorned with dark blue drapes covered with a blue blanket with Luna’s cutie mark engraved at the end of the bed. Across the room was a balcony that overlooked the city of Canterlot in it’s full glory. Next to the balcony was a large Plasma Flat-screen TV attached to the wall, suggesting that this Equestria either has the same technology as we do on Earth, or it pretty much has a mix of old-fashioned and modern technology as it was with both the show and certain versions Equestria created by Bronies. On the floor under the TV were an assortment of games and gaming consoles, indicating that this Luna was a gamer, everyone’s favorite version of Luna.

After I calmed down a little bit, I began to try to stand. Almost immediately, I lose my balance and fall on all fours. “Oh, right, I’m a pony now.” I deadpanned. I started to trot towards the balcony, legs wobbling with every other step. After a little bit, I started to get the hang of it. I arrived at the tip of the balcony and looked out to the city of Canterlot. It was daytime right now it looked more beautiful than I imagined from up here, despite it being in a cartoon world.

“Woah.” I gasped in awe. “Look’s like I’m not in Kansas anymore.”

So, I'm here I am, in Equestria, the land of friendship, magic, myth, and technicolored talking ponies, as one of the most recognized beings in this world, with no way that I know of right now to get out. Well, if I'm gonna be stuck here, I might as well do it right. Let's see how deep the "rabbit hole" goes.

Chapter 2: Deeper Down The Rabbit Hole

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My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 2: Deeper Down The Rabbit Hole

“So, I’m in Equestria.” I thought out loud to myself as I continued to look out on the balcony overlooking the city of Canterlot. “A world thought only to be of fiction and the imagination both little girls and a certain group of young men and adults. And to top it all off, not only am I one of the inhabitants of this world, I’m basically the co-ruler of said world. Fantastic.”

The more I thought about how much shit I was in, the more I thought about what shat that shit. My guess was probably the universe wanted to be a butthole and give my life bullshit, and honestly, I don't like it when things give me bullshit.

Now, it's not like I'm hating this situation, to be honest, if I was going to Equestria, I would have at least wanted to get into some interdimensional crisis and have some action. But instead, I got this messed up case of "traveling to another world for no apparent reason", and that doesn't really set right with me, I have no purpose here other than being the universe's plaything.

In any case, I knew I had to do something around here, it wasn't a good idea to stay cooped up in here hoping for a miracle that will never come. I look towards the door on the opposite side of the room, thinking on going out, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to fear what might happen if I get caught.

I then said to myself, “Ah fuck it, I’m probably gonna get caught sooner or later anyways.” and trotted towards the door. Just before I reached the door, I stopped for a moment and took a deep breath, and opened it.

There were three hallways that went left, right ,and straight, all with red carpets. The left and right hallways were fairly long with stained glass windows decorating the sides. The hallway before me was a bit shorter than the other two. At the end of the hall was a wooden double door with two guards at it’s sides. Seeing as I was on a balcony earlier, I was probably on the upper levels, so that door must lead downstairs.

Before I could take another step, one of the castle servants pass me by before noticing me. “Oh, good morning your highness, I didn’t know you were back so soon.” She greeted me happily.

I leaned back in confusion of the statement, but I had to respond. “Uh, yes good morning to you too.” I said returning the greeting. Afterwards, she just walked off.

I sighed in relief. That was weird. I thought to myself after that short encounter. Now, where should I go? I wondered looking around the halls, figuring out where to go. After a short time, I decided to take the front hallway to the stairs.

I reach the door with the two guards standing at attention giving a salute to me. “Good morning your highness.” One of the guards greeted keeping his stoic posture.

I hesitantly returned the salute. “Good morning to you too gentleme-ponies.” I said catching myself, with the guards not noticing my error, luckily. “At ease.” I commanded forcing myself in a composed position, and the guards went to their normal state. “Where is my sister?” I inquired. I didn’t really ask because I was going to her, I just needed to avoid her for a little bit, at least until I can get a grasp on the current events on this Equestria. To do that, I need to go to the library or royal archive to look at the records and hope Princess Celestia isn’t there.

“Princess Celestia is in the dining room having breakfast right now your highness.” Thank goodness for that, looks like I’m clear for now.

“Thank you, as you were.” I said as I opened the door, which led to a large spiral staircase that led to the lower levels. Stained glass windows decorated the white stairs with their colors as I started down said stairs. Unfortunately, I wasn’t completely used to my new body, so I was having trouble keeping my balance whilst trotting downstairs, I was only lucky the guards upstairs didn’t leave the door open, otherwise they would’ve seen my struggle to keep walking.

Eventually, I reached the first floor down where I could gather my bearings again. I took another double door that was on my right side that led to another set of hallways. Looking around, the hallways looked kind of similar to the one upstairs. Nevertheless, I decided to give myself a little tour, hoping I might find what I’m looking for.

After wandering around the floor a little bit, aside from having little encounters with some of the other castle servants, I eventually found the royal archives….library whatever. It looked almost exactly like it did back in the “It’s About Time” episode of MLP. Upon entering, I looked around for anyone inside…. fine, anypony inside. Anyway, aside from the royal archivist a little ways away from me, there wasn’t anypony around. Seeing the huge amount of books and scrolls lined up in the shelves, I really didn’t want to go through the trouble of searching shelf to shelf for the correct set of documents. So, I did the next best thing, ask the archivist.

Despite my fear of being found out, I went up to the archivist’s workplace while she was working. As much as I didn’t really want to interrupt her, I had to get answers soon. “Excuse me?” I called out. The archivist looked up at me with a surprised look.

“Oh, P-Princess Luna! Good morning!” She stammered as scrambled to get on her hooves. “I didn’t think you’d be coming here today!!” She said bowing down before me.

“Uh, please, you don’t really have to bow right now.” I say trying not to draw too much attention to myself. Even though there wasn’t anypony else there, I couldn’t be too careful.

“Of course, your highness.” The archivist said as she stood back up. “Now, what was it you needed?” She then inquired.

“Yes uh, I was wondering where I might find the most recent records in here, do you know where?” I replied.

“Yes, of course I do, right this way your highness.” She said as she led the way before me. “Forgive me for asking but, why do you need to look at the records?” She then asked.

Well, wouldn’t you like to know. I thought to myself before answering. “I’m afraid my reasons are personal, I cannot tell you.” I answered, trying to make it believable. Thankfully, she didn’t press any further.

“Of course Princess, I won’t pry.” She said, making a face that I couldn’t quite make out. Nevertheless, I simply dismissed it.

“Thank you for understanding” I said as we continued walking. After a few seconds, we found what we were looking for.

“This is it your highness, the most recent records thus far.” The archivist presented. “Is there anything else you need, Princess?” She then inquired.

“No, that will be alright, you’re dismissed.” I told her. The archivist then bowed her head and went on her way.

As soon as she was out of sight, I started getting to work. I figured I should start looking at recent affairs or local newspapers or anything that to help me figure out the chronology of the events as of now. I picked out a random scroll from the shelf, unrolled it a little with my hooves--although I don’t really know how I’m doing it, seeing as I have no experience being a pony and I have no idea how to use magic--and started searching for a date. “April, 12, 1015 C.R.” It read, and judging from the thousand’s, I guess “C.R.” stood for “Celestia’s Rule”, since Celestia ruled Equestria by herself ever since the Nightmare Moon incident. As I skimmed through the words, it seemed that the events of this date took place somewhere during the 4th season.

I returned the scroll to it’s original place and resumed searching for a later date. I look to the shelf behind me and find sets of newspapers from different publishers. One in particular was from “Canterlot Times”, with its headline, “Princess Twilight makes amends with old friends”, and a picture showing Twilight hanging out with the friends she had prior to the events of the first episode of MLP. Its date, “May, 21, 1016 C.R.”. This probably took place a year after the incident with Tirek and some time before the Tantabus incident. Just a little farther I thought to myself.

I searched a little bit more to the more recent events. I looked over on the other side and picked out one more scroll and read a little bit of the context. The events in this one seemed a bit unfamiliar for me. I look at the date, “June, 17, 1016 C.R.”. I couldn’t really pin a specific event going on in the show, so I picked out another scroll from an earlier date.

The one that I picked looked like it was like a day after the events of the episode before the short hiatus took place, the Tantabus incident. So this is pretty much after season 5 episode 13, Nice. At least I know a bit of the timeline.

Little did I know, while I was rummaging around, Celestia happened to come to the archives a little bit after the archivist kind of dropped me off. The archivist looked up from her workplace once again to be shocked to see Princess Celestia coming to her. “O-oh, Princess Celestia, you’re here too!” She stammered as stumbled to her hooves and bowed down to the solar monarch.

“Oh, so I’m not the only one coming here after all.” Celestia thought out loud, smiling pleasantly. “Tell me, who’s here right now?”

“Your sister, your Highness, she’s looking at the records for whatever reason” The archivist said lifting her head.

Celestia took a moment, thinking to herself. “Hmm, might as well greet her then.” She said before left, heading to where I was at.

Meanwhile, I was just reading a little bit more on the events here, scanning the words for some useful information, unfortunately not finding much of it. Although, I was in the middle of reading some point of interest, when suddenly…

“Didn’t know you’d be back so soon, Luna.” Celestia said coming up behind me.

“GAH!!!” I yelped, throwing the scroll I was holding in the air in reaction to the abruptness, clenching my chest with my hooves and breathing deeply afterwards. I look behind me and see her just giggling like a little girl. Freaking Trollestia. “Hey, Tia” I greeted anyway, looking bemused, also trying to act the part.

“So, how did it go?” Celestia inquired.

I looked at her with confusion before asking “How did what go?”

“The meeting with the Gryphons of course.” She reminded, me not knowing what she was talking about.

“Oh yeah, that, it went well.” I lied, attempting to not raise suspicion. Please don’t ask, please don’t ask, please don’t ask, please don’t ask.

“What did they say?”GOD DAMNIT!!!

I opened my mouth to reply hoping to come up with a life-saving excuse, but ultimately failed. We looked at each other, with Celestia staring at me expectantly, and with me just sweating bullets.

After a moment of expected silence, I just thought to myself, ah fuck it. “Would you like me to tell you the truth, or my best excuse?”

Celestia narrowed her eyes at me for a moment before saying “Try both.”

Alright, just go all out with it. “Well for starters, I was just at home chilling with my buds, having fun, doing nothing to anger anybody, and just enjoying life as I knew it. When SUDDENLY I’m sitting here, in a world I didn’t even know was real, in a completely foreign body, talking to someone who is pretty much a god and can probably banish me to the sun for taking the place of her sister……...and by the way, that was the truth.” I divulged to the solar monarch.

After another moment of silence, Celestia spoke again. “You know what? I don’t think I want to hear your excuse.”

“Good, because I’m not that creative.” I replied.

“So, if you’re not my sister, who are you then?” She then asked after a few seconds.

“I’m actually no one special really. Heck, I don’t even know why I’m here in the first place.” I explained. “I pretty much already summed up my situation a second ago, and I’m just here just waiting for someone, anyone to either explain my purpose here or tell me that this is just one weird-ass god-forsaken dream, which I know for a fact is not going to happen because you know why?”

“...Why?” Celestia asked awkwardly.

“Because everything around here is too vivid and detailed, I can’t really manipulate anything from the fact that I should be lucid if this was a dream, and the last thing…” I paused for a minute, staring closely at Celestia, who was feeling quite uneasy from the fact that I’m practically in her face. “The universe doesn’t even give a fuck.” I then whispered.

After that was said, I backed off after a moment to give ourselves some space. I sighed after a bit of silence before saying, “Sorry, I’m just feeling a bit confused in all this, that’s all. Also, excuse my language if you didn’t approve of some of the stuff I said.”

Celestia, looking a bit surprised, seeing that she just saw me just talking crazy in her sister’s body, took a minute before answering. “Uh, that’s quite alright… I guess, but might I ask, what is your name?” She then asked.

“Oh yeah, sorry, ahem, my name is John White.” I reply. “Like I said, just some random guy in your sister’s body, I guess.”

“Well, you may not be my sister, but I can assure you I won’t be banishing you to the sun for this.” Celestia responded kindly.

“Huh, that’s kind of relieving actually, should’ve been expected tho-”

“And, despite the situation, I think it would be appropriate that I help you take your mind off things, would you care to join me for breakfast?” She then offered before I could continue any further down my train of thought.

“...Hmm, well I guess I can’t really do much right now, so might as well.” I agreed after a moment of thought. “Lead the way.”

Celestia then turned to head towards the exit with me following suit.

End of Chapter 2

Chapter 3: I Can Explain This

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My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 3: I Can Explain This

After a few minutes of Celestia leading me through the palace, we finally came up to the dining room where we had our breakfast. Throughout all this, I’ve been completely silent. All my thoughts were occupied with everything that was happening around me that I never really bothered to share any of it.

After some more silence during breakfast, I finally decided to speak up. “Celestia, can I talk to you for a moment, alone?” I request after taking notice to the servants in the room.

Celestia nods. “Of course.” She says before looking to the servants. “Please leave us.” The servants comply and turned to leave. The moment they closed the doors, Celestia looks to me and asks with a smile, “Now what do you have on your mind?”

I took a little moment of silence, then I spoke. “Why are you doing this for me? Why help me? Aside from the form I’m currently in, I mean nothing in this world, so why?” I demanded in a careful tone so as to not come off as aggressive.

At that moment, Celestia’s smile slowly faded, her eyes slowly looking away from me. She sighed then said, “To be honest, I’m not completely sure. I just went with a feeling that I had, but for some reason I just can’t explain it, nor can I be sure of what to make of it. All I know is that I just felt something about you, but I can’t explain it.”

I sat in silence, deep in thought, trying to make sense of what she just said. So you don’t know either. I thought to myself. But going through what she said about her feeling about me, I couldn’t help but feel that there might be a purpose for me after all, as unlikely as it may be. But I pushed it aside thinking on the absurdity of such a thought. But then came my reasoning that everything that was happening right now was absurd so I would be so far off. But then that would be every bad OC story out there.

At that moment I realized that I just spent ten minutes going back and forth between reasonings that I didn’t even notice Celestia just calling out my name, almost thinking I just went brain dead by what she said and would have called the doctors. Okay that last bit was a bit of an exaggeration but she did think she broke me, and for the ten minutes she was kind of right.

Anyway, when Celestia just slapped me across the face with her hoof, that’s when I finally snapped out of my thoughts. “JOHN!!” She shouted.

“Whuzzo- wha- what happened?” I asked immediately, still trying to get a hold on my thoughts to the present.

“Whew, I finally got your attention. I think now I know how Twilight’s friends feel when they’re trying to snap her out her thoughts.” Celestia sighs in relief that I’m back in the real world, in a sense. “You were just sitting there staring into space for a while and I was beginning to worry.”

“.....Wow, sorry about that. I was just really into it.” I say. “Don’t really want you to get involved though.”

Suddenly, my stomach begins to growl with my realization that I haven’t eaten anything since I got here in the first place. I let out an exasperated sigh and said, “Of course.”

Celestia just giggles and says, “Maybe now you’d be willing to actually join me for breakfast, dear sister.”

I look at her for a second, raise my hoof and opened my mouth to counter that last bit, but then shut it when I remembered the form I was in right now. I sigh once again. “Might as well get used to it.” Then I joined Celestia at the table.

I look to the contents of the table set before us and came to shock and awe at the sight before me and realized what I was ignoring all this time whilst I was in my own little world, in a sense. The table was filled with, what I call, for lack of a more accurate description, a “Breakfast Paradise” or something, although without all the meaty items like sausages, eggs, and bacon, and whatever else humans usually eat for breakfast. Although they did substitute the bacon from what they call haybacon.

Anyway, I was about to eat when I realized, I still knew next to nothing about being a pony in this world. Picking out scrolls and reading them was one thing, but holding a fork and knife with hooves as I know most ponies do, that’s a whole different story. And I can’t do magic either as I didn’t know anything about that either.

Celestia seeing this giggles a little bit before saying, “You should count yourself lucky that the servants are still out.”

I narrow my eyes at her. “Well maybe it would be easier for both of us if I actually knew a thing or two about being a pony.” I retorted. My stomach growled again and I found myself trying to resist the urge to say those five words so as to not trigger anything. Yes, those words. Or anything along those lines.

Ah, to heck with it, I’m already a freaking horse. Might as well deal with it for now, as much as I hate to. I think to myself. I put both my hooves on the table and just start eating like a grazing horse.

Celestia just looks at me and sighs and shakes her head, still smiling though. I lift my head to look at her, swallowed the food in my mouth, and point a hoof at her and said, “Hey, at least I’m eating. It’s not my fault that I don’t know how to use magic, don’t judge.”

She lifts a hoof up. “It’s not that I’m judging you, I never was.” She explains, “It’s just.... seeing you like this. You kind of reminded me of when me and Luna were little.” She then turns to look at the window, just staring into the sky, obviously reminiscing. I didn’t really know much about her past all that much. Many of the stuff the fans make are only theories and headcanons, so I couldn’t be certain, but as she thought, I saw her smile slowly fade and I knew exactly what she was thinking. Luna’s transformation into Nightmare Moon.

I sat there watching the solar monarch feeling bad for herself as I’ve seen people in the fandom do with Celestia. Now I have a feel of what she actually goes through. But I couldn’t very well let her continue with this, so being the kind person that I am, or at least try to be, I decided to try and comfort her.

I got up from my seat, walked over to Celestia, and put my hoof on her to get her attention. “Hey, I may not know exactly what happened back then, but I got the most of it.” I started. “Luna already forgave you as much as she forgave herself. Besides, it’s all in the past right?”

Celestia looks at me and smiles. “Yes, I believe so.” After a moment of silence, she speaks again. “By the way, how do you know about our past?” she asks.

“Eh, let’s just say that where I come from, this place is kind of a thing.” I replied cryptically, wanting to have a little bit of fun out of the crypticism gig.

Celestia giggles a little at my answer. “Oh well, I believe it’s time for me to resume my duties.” She informs me.

“And I’ll be in Luna’s room if you need me. I gotta get my mind off some things.” I say to her before turning towards the door. And then we went our separate ways.

As soon as I exited the room, I looked around the hallway, figuring out on where I should go to get to Luna’s room, when I realized, I still don’t know the layout of the castle. Sigh, welp back to wandering around the castle again. I decided. I spent a few minutes wandering about but it didn’t really take long for me to come to a familiar part of the castle where I took from there back to the staircase where I came from.

Finally, I’m back to where I started from. Luna’s room. I open the door and walked towards the bed. From all that has happened so far, it’s taken quite a bit of energy from me. I climb into bed and plop my face onto the pillow. I turn my position upright, get into a comfortable position, and started to slowly drift myself to sleep.

I started having some weird dreams but for some reason, I can’t really remember the details, as I should’ve known, but that doesn’t matter right now. When I woke up though, boy was I in for one heck of a surprise.

So, I wake up, feeling a bit groggy but I got over it after a minute or two, I look out the balcony to see that it was pretty much dusk at this time. I look back to the room trying to figure out what else to do. But considering that I still don’t know how the pony body works, I can’t do not even a quarter of the things in here. So, I thought to make myself useful and hang around Celestia.

After a few minutes of navigating the castle, I eventually come up to the dual doors leading to the throne room. Three guesses on what you guys think happens next. Anyway, as soon I opened the door, I saw the very thing I had hoped not encounter until later. The real Princess Luna.

Celestia and Luna were apparently in the middle of something but turned to me as soon as I opened the door. Celestia’s look was a mix of surprise and fear, while Luna’s was just anger and confusion. And with all this, this was my only response, “Uhh… I can explain this.” Not.

End of Chapter 3

Chapter 4: My Fate

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My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 4: My Fate

Before anypony could even say anything, Luna dashes right at me with incredible speed, so quick that I didn’t even get a chance to brace myself, so she hit me in full force, really knocked the wind out of me. On top of that, it hurt even more when I hit the wall, but then I noticed that it didn’t hurt as much as it would have if I was still human, otherwise I would have had almost all my bones broken at this point, that or I’d be dead. Anyway, back to the situation at hand….fine, or hoof.

I hit the wall hard, I only had a second to grunt in pain before I was wrapped in Luna’s magical aura and pinned against said wall. She then teleported just inches away from me with her horn charged point blank at my face, ready to blow my face off at the slightest thing she sees that she doesn’t like. Her eyes were filled with anger and hostility, her stone cold glare made me think she was staring deep into my soul, I tried to move to avoid her gaze but to no avail as her magic still had me pinned. My heart was racing as I feared for my life.

“Who are you?” Luna slowly demanded. I was at an utter loss for words, afraid that what I might say could lead to my demise. When I didn’t answer, “Who are you, and how dare you try to impersonate me, you filthy cur!?!?” She shouted in her Royal Canterlot Voice, which I swear almost blew out my eardrums.

“P-Please don’t” I whimpered. I was truly scared right here, I really didn’t want to die right now. I could already tell that Luna just about had enough of me and charged her horn power further, about release that energy on me.

“LUNA, WAIT DON’T HURT HIM!!” Celestia cried, right before Luna was about to end me. At that moment, Luna stopped charging her horn but still held me in place, while with me, seeing a trusted face, felt a bit of relief but still cautious.

Luna looked to Celestia in confusion, “Wha- Tia? What is the meaning of this?” She stuttered, “This doppelganger has obviously tried to take my place, why are defending it?”

I started, “U-U-Umm, i-if you would kind of l-let me expla-”

“Silence, fool!!” Luna interrupted as she forwarded her horn to my face again.

“No, Luna, I don’t think you understand.” Celestia interjected but stopped before saying anything else, probably trying to figure out how to explain my situation.

When she did not not continue immediately, Luna narrowed her eyes. “Understand what, might I ask?” She said.

“Um…Let’s just say that he’s lost, in a way.” Celestia responded quite awkwardly.

Well given the situation you’re not really far from there, Princess. I remarked in my head, but dared not to speak aloud at this point from the matter at ha-*sigh* (every time), HOOF!!! MY GOD JOHN, YOU’RE NOT HUMAN ANYMORE!! *Sigh* Anyway, as I was saying.

Luna just tilts her head in confusion in response to what Celestia said. “It’s a long story, and I think it would do us good to take a moment to calm down and explain our situation.” She adds, seeing the confusion on Luna’s face.

Luna looks to me, then looks to her sister, then narrows her eyes at me and I give an awkward smile. She then releases me from her magic and I fall face first onto the floor. “Ow.”

After that, Celestia suggested we should have some tea to help with the calm, but not before having to do some explaining with the servants that came by during the whole commotion. Eventually we went to Celestia’s room away from all the confused eyes. From there she explained everything that happened thus far.

“So let me see if I understand correctly. You’re saying that a completely random person just suddenly woke up in my bed, in my body no less, had absolutely no connections or reasons as to why he is here, other than by what he says that ‘the universe hates him, apparently’, and you found him in the royal archives just skimming through the scrolls?” Luna summed up and both me and Celestia nodded in confirmation. By the way, Celestia decided to do something to me to help her distinguish between me and the real Luna, so she just gave me a hair tie and put my mane into a ponytail. Anyway.

“Are you sure this thing is not just a Changeling given false memories?” Luna reasoned.

“I’m pretty sure even then I would have some idea on how to use magic, but I don’t so haha” I retorted. “Also I have a name you know, Celestia already told you.”

“Oh excuse me, John, forgive me if I feel that somepony has the nerve to try to fool my sister just to get close to her and take her away or something.” She fired back.

“Are we doing this now? Well excuuuuuuse me, Princess, I’m sorry that just fell victim to some otherworldly force that I have absolutely no control over that apparently has a sadistic sense of humor.” I retaliated irritably.

“Luna, John, please. We should not be arguing with each other like little children, we should be trying to find a solution to John’s situation.” Celestia interjected in a motherly tone.

“Oh yes, please tell me how you think you’re gonna fix this.” I sassed whilst gesturing to my current form, despite my better self, but I had a hard day so I was kind of irritated.

“Silence you!! You should be grateful that my sister is helping you at all, lest you fall by my blade” Luna scolded me.

I opened my mouth to give another response, but backed down, not because of Luna’s threat, no. Despite everything that was going on, my mind suddenly wandered back to my world. Back to my friends. It took me a good minute to realize how much I was beginning to miss my world, to realize I was getting a little homesick. I brought a hoof to my head and let my head hang down. At this point, I was holding back tears, trying to keep control of myself… I failed… and I broke down after that.

Celestia and Luna was bearing witness to this, Celestia looked to her sister with a face saying, “Now you’ve done it” all over it, with Luna following suit with her face saying, “What did I do?”

Celestia came over to me and placed her wing on my back to try and comfort me. “I’m sorry, John, you don’t really have to listen to my sister’s comments.” She soothed, obviously getting the wrong idea on my situation.

I got the least control I had at the time to calm her nerves a little bit, “No, no, it’s not her, i-it’s just. *sigh* *sniff* It’s *sigh* oh my god, I-I.” I whimpered, trying to get my words out. Doing my best to clear my head, I continued. “I-It’s just that I just realized how much miss my home.” I managed to let out before breaking down again.

I didn’t really see it, but Celestia felt pretty bad for me, but Luna, although softened a little, still seemed a little untrusting. “How do I know you’re not just playing us for fools? How do you know so much about us without being in our world? How can I believe your tale?”

“YOU WOULDN’T UNDERSTAND!!!” I snapped angrily. “You might have understood if someone shared your darkness, you would have understood if someone was some reformed evil, but that’s not my case!” I stood up against the lunar princess, and slowly walked toward her.

“Can you imagine just being ripped from your world for a reason you don’t even know? When you’ve done nothing wrong in your life and you’ve been convicted for an unknown crime that you didn’t commit? When you have loving friends and family that you didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye to? And you don’t even know when or even IF you’re going to return or not. SO TELL ME!! TELL ME IF YOU CAN RELATE!!” I shouted in pure anger towards Luna, with tears streaming freely down my face. At that moment, I lost all energy to stand and I fell to the ground just sobbing. No joke, I was actually crying, I actually missed my world and I didn’t know if I was even going to see it again. I felt alone, helpless, and I almost felt that nobody could help me, almost.

Both Celestia and Luna watched as I weeped in despair. Celestia I guess could relate a little, her sister was pretty much taken away from her by Nightmare Moon, that’s when her world crumbled, and she was forced to live with it for a thousand years. She looks to Luna, whose face was just filled guilt. Couldn’t really blame her, she didn’t know, she couldn’t have for sure. Who was she to judge someone as lost, alone, and confused as I. The two sisters looked at each other with the same thought, though they couldn’t sympathize with me, the least they could do is to try to comfort me as best they can.

As I felt their embrace around me, I held tightly to them, and as I did, I felt a small amount of comfort, and I wanted it to last. It took me a good ten minutes, but I was able to calm down. After a few moments of silence I finally spoke.

“Why?” I ask quietly. “Why do I have to be here? What have I done wrong? Is this my fate right now? To be alone in a foreign world? So many questions, all without answers. I just can’t take it.”

Celestia was the first to respond. “John, we may not be able to provide you any answers, but know that there is always an answer to any question.”

“And we can be there to find them with you.” Luna adds in with a smile.

I look at the two princesses, after a few moments, I was became overwhelmed with relief and I burst into tears of joy, with the knowledge that I’ll at least have some help. “Thank you, thank you both. You probably don’t know how much this means to me.” I croaked while in tears. “I’m sorry that I snapped at you guys, I was kind of not myself in a way.” I apologized.

“You do not need to apologize, my friend, we will just be with you to help you through this.” Celestia reassured me.

“I’d like that, thank you again.” I responded.

And now I’m here. Right now, I’m getting by, it’s only been a day since I arrived here, but I think I’ll manage here. But now that I think of it, I feel that it’s probably going to get a bit more interesting around here, don’t know why though, may or not be my imagination though, I might as well find out soon enough. It’s night right now, so I might as well rest now.

Meanwhile….

I’m kind of swaying between consciousness, god I don’t wanna wake up yet, I’m actually surprised my alarm hasn’t sounded yet. You know what? I don’t think I realized how comfortable my bed was sometimes, then again, this seems more comfortable than usual.

“H-Hey, stay where you are.” I hear an unfamiliar voice say. Meh, someone’s probably in my house…….SOMEONE’S IN MY HOUSE?!? My eyes shot open and I look around for the source of the voice, but I look around the room seeing it’s all crystals and stuff.
“Wait this isn’t my house.” I observed, but then I turned to look behind me and I see the last thing I’d expect to see, Twilight Sparkle, for real. “What the- how- HOW DID I GET HERE?!? HOW ARE YOU HERE?!?” I shout pointing my hoof at her, wait hoof?!? “WHY AM I A PONY?!?” Mirror mirror, I NEED A MIRROR!! I run to a nearby crystal which just happens to be as reflective as a mirror. Oh. My. God. WHY AM I TWILIGHT?!? At this point, I’m screaming. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!”

“W-What is going on here?” Twilight asks clearly as confused as I am.

“I was gonna ask you the same question, because I don’t know!!” I respond, still panicking, but trying to control myself.

“O-Okay, wait a second, w-we need to take a breath and calm down here, can you do that for me?” Twilight instructed.

I look at the purple alicorn. She’s taking this surprisingly calmly right now but I decided to comply and took a few deep breaths. After a few moments, I calmed down.

“Are you okay now?” She asks. I nodded to respond. “First things first, what’s your name?

I took on more deep breath before answering. “My name is Hannah, Hannah Edwards.”

End of Chapter 4

Chapter 5: Uh...Hi Hannah

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My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 5: Uhh...Hi Hannah

John White
Hannah Edwards
Pinkie

Woah, okay, umm…so I just say whatever in this…book...thing? And it writes?

Yeah I still don’t get it either. Magic is weird...when it’s actually happening. Oh wait hold on, forgot! Hey what’s up everybody, It’s John here, and I’m here with Hannah Edwards from my world! WHOO, I’M NOT ALONE!!

John, what do you think this is, a YouTube blog? It’s a book.

Whatever, I kind of always wanted to do some kind of YouTube channel, but I never knew what I would do for it. The most I’ve done with my channel is just use it for commenting videos.

John, focus.

Right, umm. Oh yeah, they don’t know this yet, crap, uhh. I kind of forgot to mention this awhile back but, Celestia kind of gave me this book to basically keep a log on myself, kind of how some people do in the movies or something, you know? However, I later found out from Luna, a little bit before you arrived, that she picked up a magical connection from me originating from another plane of reality, albeit a bit weak. I assumed that it might have been our world but she said that was highly unlikely. But when she did a quick little inspection of the connection...or whatever she was doing, it lead to this book. Neither me or she knew exactly what that meant, but I think that anything I say to this thing...er, write? I dunno, anyway, it may be going outward to whoever may be reading this. Or maybe I’m taking this a whole other way. I dunno, who knows anyway.

…Okay, I didn’t really say anything while you were talking because I didn’t wanna be rude, but you lost me after you mentioned something about you and Luna, what did you say?

*Narrows eyes* Basically, someway, somewhere, somehow, someone could be reading this but only read it. I don’t think they can pull us home like this.

...Makes sense, kind of.

So, wanna tell whoever’s out there your story on how you got here, Twilight?

First, you make it sound like we’re talking to aliens or something. Second, shut up.

Hmph.

So...anyway, as my friend has mentioned, my name is Hannah Edwards. I’m from the Earth, and...I’m also stuck in the form of Twilight Sparkle...for some reason. And I guess that I kind of ended up here the same way John did, from what he told me. Also, I noticed that John has already gotten the first few seconds of my arrival in here...in the most theatrical way possible.

What? C’mon it wasn’t all like it.

Yes, not all of it but the way you ended it makes it look like this is some kind of TV series.

Aren’t we techn-

Anyway, continuing where we left off…

Hannah

“My name is Hannah Edwards” I answered when Twilight asked for my name. “Pleased to meet you.”

“Likewise, my name is Twilight Sparkle” The purple alicorn replied, extending her hoof.

Up until this point however, I never noticed that I was standing on all four hooves. And when my brain registered this, it suddenly lost all familiar functionality with my new body, thus I lost all balance. “Whoa- wha- oof!” And I just fell to the ground.

Twilight giggles a little before offering her hoof in assistance. “Need help?” She asks.

I admit I was a bit hesitant. “You seem surprisingly calm given the situation.” I remarked.

“Oh, uhh, just kind of ‘First Contact’ stuff, hehe” The Princess of Friendship replies sheepishly.

(Well she isn’t really far there.)

(John, shut up and let me tell my story.)

(By the way, she makes it sound like this kind of thing may have happened before.)

(Yeah, I kind of thought about that too a little bit, but it turned out that she kind of just read a couple of Sci-Fi novels here and there, and I never really pinned her to like Sci-Fi, knowing her.)

However, while all this was going on, both me and Twilight forgot that from all the commotion, we kind of woke up her friends. We didn’t realize this until right when I was about to take Twilight’s hoof to help me up, that was when the rest of the Mane 6 burst through the door. All their faces were written with shock and confusion.

Rainbow Dash was the first to respond to my appearance. “CHANGELING!!” She shouted before readying her wings to charge at me.

“RAINBOW, NO WAIT!!” Twilight tried to call, but to no avail. Rainbow was already flying towards me with incredible speed.

She hit me in full force without me having time to brace myself, knocking the breath out of me. Hurting even more when I hit the wall, leaving a big crater in the crystal.

(Deja vu. By the way, it didn’t hurt you as much as it would have in our world didn’t it?)

(Yeah, I noticed that, but I didn’t think too much on it.)

I was dazed a little from the impact, but Rainbow pinned me at my neck with her hoof. We were face to face with each other, with Rainbow looking pretty angry. “What the buck are you doing here, you stupid bug?” She interrogated before Twilight stepped in to stop everything before things got out of hand. (Hoof, we’re not on Earth anymore.) (I do what I want, shut up!)

“Rainbow Dash, stop!!” She shouted before dragging Rainbow away from me with her magic, then I fell on the floor. “She’s not a Changeling!” She then tried to explain to Rainbow.

“Whaddya mean? It looks just like you! It must be trying to spy on us or something!” Rainbow reasoned.

“No, Rainbow, you don’t understand.” Twilight started before hearing a moan of pain from me as I was trying to stand. She then released Rainbow before running to me to assist me.

“Hannah, are you alright?” She asks in concern.

“Hannah? It has a name?” Rainbow Dash asks in confusion.

Twilight glared at her friend. “First of all, yes, Rainbow, it has a name, it’s Hannah. Second, that thing you’re referring to, is somepony who is lost and confused right now and obviously not from here!” She scolded.

“Umm, I-I’m not exactly a pony, s-so to say, I was actually a human before I got here. Ahh, god that hurt” I explained, despite the pain my body still had.

“Ah’m still kinda lost here. You sayin’ that yer some kinda alien or something, right?” Applejack inquired, cutting into the discussion. I nodded while tilting my head side to side kind of to say ‘I guess you can say that.’ “How exactly did ya get here, if ya don’t mind me askin’?”

I opened my mouth to answer, but closed it when I couldn’t think of a good explanation. I took a moment before giving a reply.

“I really don’t know to be honest” I started. “I mean, one moment, I was in my bed sleeping, next thing I know, I’m standing here in the body of your friend here.”

“That does sound rather peculiar, darling.” Rarity adds in herself into the conversation, in thoughtfulness. “To show up in a foreign land out of nowhere for no reason at all, it seems rather strange for something like that to occur.”

Suddenly we hear Pinkie Pie rolling on the floor laughing her butt off for whatever reason. Me and Twilight look at each other in confusion. And we had the guts to ask, “Uhh, what are you laughing about, Pinkie?”

“Oh, not much, but you should’ve seen her face, ehehehehe” She briefly replied before going back to being a laughing heap.

I was about to ask why that was, but Twilight intervened by laying her hoof on me with a look on her face telling me that I shouldn’t go there. I complied, but I still couldn’t help but wonder just what the heck she was talking about.

I don’t think I even want to know, knowing how she is both in canon and in the fandom.

Oh come on, it can’t be that bad, what’s she gonna do? Pop out of your ha-

BOO! WASSAP!!

GAAAAAHH!! (And then Pinkie disappears)

*panting* I just saw my whole life flash right before my very eyes…...it was really boring.

*panting* How, just how, I-uh-I-just-wa-I just-

*puts hoof on Hannah* No...that’s far enough into that thought. Leave it be and you might stay sane.

You say that as if you had this experience even though I know for a fact that you haven’t.

That’s not important though. So, what else happened after that?

Not all that much actually, we finished our introductions, Spike took a letter and sent it to Princess Celestia hoping she could help me out, we took a train to Canterlot and...here we are.

….Huh. I kind of expected a bit more than that…. I guess I could share my side of the story. Ahem. So starting from where I left off on here,I was having a pretty good night’s sleep before you got here so...

John

I hear voices, familiar ones at that, I couldn’t really make out what they were saying though, eventually though I felt a smack on the head and I was on full alert.

“Wake up, Sleeping Beauty!” The voice called out more clearly, which sounded male, and as I was focusing more I turned to the source of the voice. It was Simmons.

“...Simmons?” I asked, still trying to make sense of what’s going on. Strange, I could’ve sworn I was... With that thought, I took a look at my surroundings. I was back at our cafe. In our own hangout place. “Wha-I...I’m back?”

“Back to the land of the living? Yeah, where’d you think you went?” Simmons responded, clearly unaware of what I was talking about.

“I...uh-I thought...I...huh.” I stammered, still struggling to process what was going on So was that all really a dream after all? I thought.

“Well, if you’re done lazing your butt off, let’s go.” Simmons invited.

“Uh, where we going?”

“We’re gonna go Lazer Tag, remember? We only took so long because the girls were just taking their sweet time getting ready...for whatever reason why.” He informed.

“......Huh. Ah well, must’ve been my imagination after all.” I told myself before complying to go with him.

As we were leaving the building however, something caught my eye, actually someone...or rather somepony.

It was Princess Luna. Huh? What’s she doing here? I thought to myself, very oblivious to what’s actually going on.

“Impressive place you live in, with wonderful friends to boot. No wonder you miss it.” The Lunar Princess said absentmindedly.

“Princess Luna? How’d you get here?” I asked, still not catching on.

“Hey, John, you coming?” I hear Simmons call out. Unaware of Luna’s presence. Which had me confused.

“Wait a minute, you don’t even se-” And at this moment I realized... I be dumb as f*ck.

“FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-”

In the “Real World”

“-UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK” I screamed as I awoke, finding myself back in “reality”. Yep, here I am again, the wonderful little world of magic, and rainbows, and friendship. Yeah, this is the life. “Uuugghhh, why can’t I wake up from this dream?”(...Did you just…) (...Do what?) (...nevermind.) I groaned as I picked up a pillow and buried my face in it’s cloudy goodness. Yes, the pillow is in fact made from a cloud, I asked. At first I didn’t know how, but then I realized I was in Equestria, where pegasi control the weather, and technically I’m part pegasus since I’m...this, but I’m going off-topic.

After some time, I eventually decided to get on with my new life and get out of bed. I picked up a hair tie with my magic, which the Princesses spent some time teaching me how to do, but only telekinesis for now. It took some effort, and it was a little sloppy but I managed to put the hair tie on my astral mane...somehow, and put it into a ponytail. It was given to me by the Princesses, to kind of set me apart from the real Princess Luna, at least until they can either find a way to get me home, or fix my appearance to avoid confusion during my time here. The Princesses also explained my situation to the servants and guards so I was basically cleared of Changeling suspicion.(What’s a Changeling?) (I’ll explain it to you after we finish this.)

I finished getting ready making myself at least presentable, which I don’t really do all the time back in my world. For a minute however, I take a look in the mirror at myself. Only that I don’t really see myself...I see her. To be honest, at this moment, I never thought I would actually miss my reflection. After a little bit, I sighed and decided to continue on and see it life now would get better or worse. I assumed it was the latter, but I never knew.

I then made my way to the dining hall. After a few wrong doors and turns, I eventually arrived at my destination. Opening the doors I found that Celestia had already began her breakfast. “Oh, good morning, dear sis-” She started until she glanced at my mane and realized it was me. “Oh, it’s just you John. My mistake.” She says with a smile.

“Meh, it’s all good, I’m probably gonna get that a lot anyway.” I dismissed before taking my seat, and started eating whatever was on the table.

“So, how did you sleep if you don’t mind me asking?” Celestia asked me.

Much to my displeasure of that reminder, I let out an exasperated sigh and rested my head on my hoof. “Well, I was having a rather good dream before your sister had to go and remind me where I am now.” I reply to the solar princess in a disgruntled tone.

“Oh dear, I’m sure she didn’t intend to make you feel that way.” She tried to reassure me, but it didn’t really change my mood much. I took a bite out of a waffle anyway.

After a few moments of silence, Princess Luna came into the room with a dejected look on her face. She’s probably come to apologize. Assuming this fact, it didn’t really change my mood. Instead, I just slumped back into my chair, sighing. Actually, looking at this in hindsight, I might as well have been acting like a little kid right there, not willing to accept an apology. Anyway, I’m getting off topic.

As Luna came into the room, she surprisingly didn’t say anything right away. Instead she just silently walked over to the table, took her seat, and started her meal. For a good two minutes or so, all three of us at the table sat in dead silence, with the occasion of some slight shuffling and soft coughing from the few guards and servants standing post in our uncomfortable silence.

As much as I didn’t like the silence, I didn’t really have...the wanting to speak, for lack of a better word at the moment. I just...didn’t really care at the time. But at the same time, deep down, I really wanted somepony to break the silence. For Celestia, noticing the tension between us, as much as she herself wanted to break it, she knew that she’d might force the situation, so she too waited for either of us to do it. Unfortunately, Celestia also noticed that Luna was having difficulty figuring out what to say. Who could blame her? I’m not exactly the happiest person/pony in the world right now, so what can she do?

Finally, Luna sighed and took one more moment of silence before speaking. “John…?” She began, catching my attention and raising my eyebrow. “I...would like to apologize for my intrusion in your dream whilst you slept...it was very inconsiderate of me.” You don’t say. “To be honest, despite what you testified to us yesterday, I still had doubts.” Wow, so even my legitimate sob story wasn’t enough for you? “I wanted to be sure...that beyond a shadow of a doubt, that you were true.” Took you long enough to realize that, didn’t it? “And...after I saw your friends... I never really realized how much I missed mine.” *snrk* like you cou-wait… This got my attention and curiosity.

I perked up from my seat. “Wait, come again?” I asked for confirmation.

Luna sighed once again. “Back when Tia and I were fillies, we had six friends, unlike the Element Bearers today, you probably know them when looking in the archives… Clover, Hurricane, Platinum, Smart Cookie, Puddinghead, and Pansy. They were our first friends.” Of course, how could I forget. I thought to myself, starting to feel sorry for my behavior. “They were always there for us, and us for them...for each other. When they passed, although we were severely disheartened, we had to stay strong, because the world wasn’t going to allow us to break from the loss of our closest friends.”

For awhile, I sat there in my seat in remorse. I saw Celestia walk over to her sister and placed her wing over her in comfort and sympathy.

“I...guess that when I saw how you were with your friends...I couldn’t really help but fall back to those days. Where we didn’t have as much responsibility as we do now and we could just enjoy life how it was. For that...I am truly sorry.” Luna finished.

I sat up from my seat and walked up to where Luna is.“Actually, I feel that I should be the one who’s sorry. For my behavior.” I began. “It was wrong of me to give you the ‘cold shoulder’ treatment, as some people say on my world. I guess I was still sulking about the fact that I might be here forever that I forgot for a little bit how to live life for how it is as you go. It’s not really your fault that I’m like this.”

“No, it is my fault!” Luna interjected. “I didn’t believe you and I thought I could expose you and I didn’t think that would hurt you instead I-”

“No, you don’t understand” I attempted to reason, until Celestia inserted herself into the conversation.

“I think...we’ve done some very good progress in getting you two to get along, albeit a bit strange to see two of my sister seemingly bickering with each other, even though that isn’t the case.” Celestia said as she broke us up.(Wow...that got pretty emotional. Never really thought you could actually get to that level) (Uhuh... this place kind of set me off the wrong way when I got here, that’s all. It’s probably gonna get better, after this…) Just as she was about to continue speaking however, a scroll popped up, floating in the air beside her, which I figured was delivered through Spike’s dragonfire.

“Oh my, what could Twilight be up to now?” She wondered as she opened up the letter with Luna walking up beside Celestia, wanting to read the letter as well. As they read on however, Celestia raised an eyebrow. Didn’t really know what for...but that’s none of my business.

The solar monarch then turns head to me with a smile. “Well, we’re going to have visitors, one of which I think you will be most pleased with seeing.” She says with so much smug.

With that statement, I raised my eyebrow as well, and then rolled my eyes in denial. “Pshh, I seriously doubt that.” I huffed. “When are they coming though?”

“They’re already on their way on the train. They should be arriving within the hour.” Luna replied to my question.

With that said I didn’t have much to do around here other than just accompany Celestia and Luna to the throne room and just sit there idly until they arrive, all while looking presentable...yeah that sucked.(Little did he kno-) (No! Shut up.) Just when I was going to fall flat on my face in boredom, a guard came into the throne room.

“Your majesty, the Element Bearers have arrived.” He announced.

“Ah, splendid, send them in.” Celestia says in delight.

*sigh* This outta be good. I thought to myself before leaned my back beside Celestia’s throne. I legitimately didn’t really care for all this at the time, so I just went to show it. Luna leans over to look at me with an incredulous look from the disrespect I was showing, but before she could say anything to me, the Mane 6 enter the room, along with Spike and...another Twilight? ...wut? As they did so, Luna fumbled to get herself presentable to them.

“Princess Celestia!” A Twilight greeted happily.

“Welcome back, Twilight.” Celestia returned in kind.

Twilight was about to say something but was caught short of her words to see two identical alicorns at the flanks of Celestia’s throne. With that, she was at a loss for words, confused about what could be happening. The others have noticed too, see one Luna standing tall and proud while the other was just lounging about, not even giving a flying fart to anything going on.

Noticing their confusion, and the slight uneasiness forming on their faces, Celestia spoke up. “My little ponies, before you say anything, this is not a changeling or a clone of my sister. This John White. He stumbled upon here in this form by pure happenstance, and we’ve been trying to find a way to send him home, whilst starting to help him adjust to life here in the duration of finding a solution.” But at the mention of my name, I noticed the other Twilight perk up almost immediately and starts to stare at me. I didn’t really know what was going on, but I did then was just raise an eyebrow at her. All the while though, whilst Celestia and the Mane 6 were conversing about the situation, I didn’t notice I drowned out all that they were saying as the supposed Twilight clone began walking slowly toward me.

Before the guards were going to notice her and stop her, she spoke. “John...is that you?”

I just gave her a look. Okay, she knows me for some reason. I thought before saying, “Yeah, who’s asking?”

“Hannah! What are you doing?” Twilight called out, not wanting to draw too much attention. Well too late, at the mention of that name, that caught all of my attention.

I stood up. “Wait a minute, Hannah?” I started. “...Hannah Edwards? ...Hold on...Josh’s diner?”

“Undertale as your side bae?” ‘Hannah’ returned

“You being a real-life Twilight?”

...

…

“.....AAAAAAYYYYYYYY” I screamed, holding my arms out, which the confirmed Hannah returned in kind. Although when about to come toward each other into an embrace, we just fell flat on our faces as we tried to walk on our hind legs.

The others watching could only just stand there with a blank stare, trying to make sense of what just happened. And for a while we stayed on the floor, and I could only say, muffled through the floor, “Well this is awkward…”

And now here we are, telling our stories in a world full of magically colorful talking po-*gets smacked* Ow! What was that for?

That last bit didn’t happen.

Aawww c’mon, I can’t have fun with this thing?

If you’re gonna tell a story, tell it right. Because if I recall correctly, it went along the lines of…

What really happened…
Hannah

‘John’ stood up. “Wait a minute, Hannah?” ‘he’ started. “...Hannah Edwards?”

“Oh gosh...it is you!” I exclaimed. “And…you’re pretty much a girl.”

“*inhale*......” Was pretty much his reaction, until his face fell flat with a sigh.

After a little bit of me staring at him, still figuring out if I should still call you a her instead,(No! Leave me alone) all he said was “Well this is awkward…”

And that’s what really happened

She says with the most smug look possible, look at least things happened in my version...and probably what I wanted to happen.

Well guess what? The universe doesn’t care about that either.

No fair. Anyway, that’s it from us for now, um don’t really have much to explain anything that I haven’t already, and what you can probably figure out soooo…..yeah, leave like and-*gets smacked again* OW! STOP HITTING ME!

Again with the youtube thing. That’s not even a thing here.

Then how come I found a Playstation looking thing in Luna’s room!?

Like you’ve always said, “because reasons”, there, that’s your outro, that’s it you done.

But-

*book closes*

That night...
Simmons

Mmmmm, my god let me sleep a little longer, jeez Was the thought that came to mind as I was coming into consciousness. My bed got really comfy all of a sudden though.

My eyes are starting to flutter open as I start to wake up, grumbling throughout the way. They shot open though as I noticed how feminine it sounded and quickly looked over myself, finding myself in a cyan equine body in a bed made of...clouds? Oh don’t tell me. As I observed my surroundings, my suspicions were confirmed, I was in Rainbow Dash’s house...if the show has any accuracy to this. “Oh what the frick is this!?” I say to myself trying to get a hold of the situation. Taking full attention to my voice, I simply screamed.

I try to get out of bed, but as I try to walk, I fall flat on my face on the floor with a soft fwump. I guess that clouds are as soft as they say...if it were solid. I struggle onto my hooves and looked around searching around for a mirror. Managing to find one, I stumble towards it and fully observe myself. I couldn’t believe it...I was actually Rainbow Dash herself. Everything from the wings, her Cutie Mark, her eyes, everything.

“Oh hell nah cuh.” Was all I could say in response to all...this. But before I could do anything else, I hear the door crash open. I look over to see another Rainbow Dash staring at me from the door with a shocked and angry look on her face. Uh oh. Was the thought that went through my mind before I was tackled so hard that I went straight through the cloud-structured wall. My god that hurt.

When I was finally pinned to a wall after going through a few walls, the rainbow pegasus screamed, “WHO THE BUCK ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?!?”

“W-w-what?” I whimpered.

“WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!?”

“Wha-I-I don’t even know where I am!!”

“WHAT?!? No no, wait…*Inhale* do you know somepony named... ‘Hannah Edwards’ I think her name was?” She then asked.

“...Yes? She’s one of my friends.” I replied

Rainbow Dash took an exasperated sigh. “Great, just great, you’re with them.” She deadpanned. She then asked, “So, what’s your name then?”

I gulped then responded, “Uh...My name is Richard Simmons”

End of
Chapter 5

Chapter 6: So This Is A thing...

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John
Simmons
Hannah

My Life As Princess Luna Because Reasons
Chapter 6: So This Is A Thing...

So let me see if I have this straight. You were given this book as a journal, it writes itself as you say stuff to it, and all that’s written in this thing goes to someplace that we can’t even go?

...Yeah that about sums it up.

...That sounds stupid. How did you even come to that conclusion?

Right?

Hey, I was just guessing! I had to have something to work with, and this is a magical land of colorful talking ponies with dungeons and dragons, what did you expect?

Uh, maybe just a little bit of sense in that theory?

...And what is so sensible about this place?

Your friends?

Rekt.

Shut up. Anyway Simms, wanna tell whoever’s out there who the frick you are?

Pshh, yeah yeah, *ahem*...Hey, my name’s Richard Simmons...in the body of Rainbow Dash, hehe...yeah whoop de doo. Pretty much in the same situation as these bozos.

...Bruh.

Oh, I’m sorry, I think I meant to say lovebirds.

BRUH!!! CAN YOU NOT?!?!*covers mouth*

…

…dang bro chill, almost took my ears out shouting this close.

Yoooooooo, did I just do an RCV?

...RCV?

The Royal Canterlot Voice…I just shortened it. Sorry about that though

...Right, so Simms, you wanna tell us your story?

Well there’s not really much to say really that’s any different from your guys’ setup. Though I’ll give it a shot…

Simmons

“...So you went to sleep after a long day of something and just popped in here?” Rainbow inquired, with me nodding in confirmation. “Pretty stupid if you ask me, not to mention boring.”

“I’m still trying to wrap my head around this place, don’t ask me for much of an explanation.” I said defensively.

Rainbow just sighs and says, “Looks like I’m gonna have to take you to Twi now.” She was about to take off when she turned her head to me. “Please tell me you know how to fly.” She then asks.

“Girl, I just got here! How could I?” I reply.

The pegasus just sighs. “I’m gonna have to carry you myself don’t I?” She muttered to herself before walking towards me and picking me up. “I’m too tired for this crap. You better hold on.” She says, prepping her wings.

“Wait, how fast are you gonnaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH-”

Rainbow took off so hard, I could barely hold on with my non-existent hands, I had to rely on the shear strength of my arms to keep on to her. After a few minutes of holding on for dear life, Rainbow Dash lost control whilst trying to land and we crashed through a window of the... crystal... tree... castle... thing. And it hurt.

“Uuuuggghh, dang. If I didn’t know this wasn’t a dream before, I definitely know now.” I groaned. When suddenly the door of the room we crashed into burst open revealing Twilight looking pretty peeved right now.

“RAINBOW!! It’s the middle flipping night! What in the hoof ar-” Twilight stopped in the middle of sentence. The reason being that she probably noticed me. (But she not yor senpai tho.) (Boy, I will hurt you, let me speak.)

“Twilight...we got another one.” Rainbow groaned before falling unconscious. Probably due to exhaustion.

With Rainbow out cold, I was pretty much left alone with the purple alicorn. We stared at each other in silence for a bit, both not sure how to respond to one another given the situation. Twilight must’ve still been contemplating the presence of another Rainbow Dash, which is understandable, but I was just sitting there still pretty confused on what was going on, mostly about what Rainbow meant by “we got another one”.

I got my answer after probably a minute of staring at each other when another Twilight steps into view. Oh okay fine... so that’s what she meant. I thought to myself.

“What’s going on now?” The other Twilight mumbled groggily before noticing me. “Oh hey, a double Rainbow......wait what!?”(*snrk* pffffffhehe double rainbow) (Shut up) (I was pretty tired I’ll have you know.) (It’s still funny though...) (As I was saying…)

I still giggled at that though. Then Twilight said,”Yes Hannah, there is in fact two Rainbows. We’re gonna have to sort this out somehow.” The mention of Hannah’s name actually caught my attention, and on instinct, my ears perked up, which I didn’t know I could do, and the thought of which I almost forgot at the time that I was a pony. (That was way too much exposition...but I don’t care)

“Wait, Hannah? Hannah who?” I asked.

The first Twilight was about to answer, but “Hannah” beat her to it when she came in front of her. “That’s me, Hannah Edwards...who’s asking?” She said.

“Oh my gosh, hey Hannah! It’s me Simmons!” I exclaimed, confirming my thoughts.

“Wait, Simmons!? How did you…” She stopped mid-sentence. “Let me guess, you went to sleep, you wake up like that, and you got knocked into a wall?”

“You say that like that’s a thing going on right now.” I replied instead.

She shrugged. “It happened with John, so I guess...”

I recoiled at that. “Wait, what!? John’s here too!? How many people are here anyway!?” I asked in confusion.

“Just us from what I know, including you now.” Hanna replied.

While we had our little talk, Twilight was apparently gathering her friends together. When they came, their reaction wasn’t really as extreme I expected it, probably because of you guys. Afterwards, the Mane 6 took us to the Round Table, which evidently looked pretty accurate that of the show, only that I’m actually in it now. And to be honest, the rest of the castle looked the part as well, to what was shown in the show that is, which I also should’ve expected.

For some time, the Mane 6 were conversing among themselves, despite how late it is, trying to figure out what to do with us. In the end, they decided to contact Princess Luna to see if she can help, given that it’s still night and she’s probably sleeping.

I wondered for a little bit who John ended up as, since Hannah was Twilight. I got my answer about ten minutes later when instead of Princess Luna requesting that we come to her, she decided to basically teleport here herself, along with… a sleepy looking Luna? (Oh boy)

“*Yawn* Hey Hannah.” ‘Luna’ mumbled tiredly.

“Hey John, look! It’s Simmons!” Hannah exclaimed, gesturing to me, sitting next to the real Rainbow Dash, who had her head down on the table at the time.

“Which one, sleepyhead or… I don’t know how to pin you as, I’m too tired.” ‘John’ asked, still sounding half asleep.

I decided to speak up. “Wait she’s John!?”

“Damn straight boy...wait who again?” ‘He’ mumbled again...before falling asleep on the spot.

Hannah sighed as she walked up to John and slapped him...hard...knocking him on the floor.

“GAH!! Hannah!? What was that for!?” He yelled.

“You awake now sleepyhead?” She sassed.

“Geez, you didn’t have to hit so hard.” John muttered as he rubbed his cheek. “So what’s going on?”

“You don’t know? You’re really that tired?”

“Hey! I had a long freaking day, okay. I deserve this.”

“Anyway, Simmons just showed up as Rainbow Dash.”

“Oh really? That him?” He gestured to me, waving.

John then just tackles me to the ground, and given that I crashed into two things today, it hurt.

“Gah! Hey hey hey, that hurts! Ow.” I grunted, which prompted my friend to lay off me. “*sigh* Thank you. First Rainbow Dash tackles me at high speeds, then I was sent crashing through a window to get here, I didn’t need another injury from you.”

“Hehe sorry. It’s good to see you though.” John patted me on the back anyway.

And that’s really all that happened, did something happen that we still don’t know about?

Uhh, no not really. That’s pretty much the whole thing.

Huh… I actually expected more than that. Not that I’m compla-

*Somepony knocks on the door*

Huh? Who can that be?

Hey guys, Ragegamer here. I decided to take the reins of this story for right now and put it into 3rd person. I'll probably do this from time to time as the story goes on...just to let you know.

John opens the door to see a Royal Guard standing before him.

“Yes, how can I help you?” He asks.

“Her Majesty, Princess Celestia, wishes to see the three of you in her chambers.” The guard informed.

“Oh, right now?” John says before looking toward his pony turned friends then turning back to the guard. “Yeah, gimme a sec. Hey guys, the princess wants to see us.”

“Oh boy, I wonder what for…” Simmons remarked nonchalantly before following John out the room with Hannah following suit.

After some time of being escorted by the guard, the group arrive at Princess Celestia’s chambers, where the princess herself seems to be speaking to Luna. The conversation seemed to be cut short when they came in however before they could even catch even a hint of what they were talking about.

“Ah, thank you for coming you three.” Celestia greeted them warmly, “Me and my sister have been discussing our course of action of what you can do here while we search for a way to get you home.”

“We have decided that whilst doing so, we may as well teach you the ways of our world and how to properly utilize your new bodies so as to not be idle during your stay.” Luna continued for her sister.

“We would’ve taken the time to teach you ourselves, but something has risen that requires our full attention. Therefore, we have assigned this task to Twilight Sparkle and her friends. You should be familiar with them already.” Celestia informed

“However, given your current forms, until we can address this properly to the public, you will remain here in the palace for the time being.” Luna finished.

The group was silent for a few moments before John spoke up. “So...they’re gonna teach us magic?”

The princesses nodded. “WELL SIGN ME UP!!” John shouted.

As for Simmons and Hannah, they could only respond to that outburst by sitting down, putting their hooves together, taking a deep breath, extending their arms toward John, and uttering, “Boi.”

End of Chapter 6