Wham Bam Flim Flam!

by SugarTwirl

First published

Flim and Flam go on vacation and without meaning to somehow find themselves in Ponyville again.

All Flim and Flam wanted to do was go to the beach and somehow they managed to get stuck in Ponyville. Maybe fate has something more in store for Flim and Flam? Something along the lines of romance perhaps...

Back again...

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FLIM

I lay back against the carriage we had borrowed of our uncle Stan as Flam continues to guide it accordingly.

“How long do you think it’s gonna take for us to get to the Sea, O brother?”

He smirks, “Well, I’d be more worried if this thing can actually hold up till then.”

I tap against the wooden seat with my hoof.

“Yeah, well, let’s hope.”

“We’ll be passing Ponyville soon. How about we stop there and grab a bite to eat, eh brother?”

“Sounds like a swell plan indeed.”

Just as I say that, the carriage starts making weird noises.


Tinker looks around underneath the carriage and looks at us.

“I’m sorry fellas but looks like this thing is gonna take at least a week to repair. It is quite ancient and all.”

“I’m afraid we can’t afford that time my good man! We are expected at the beach at the Shell Hotel the day after tomorrow” Flam replies.

“I can try fixing this as fast as I can but it’s still gonna take more than 3 days.”

I shake my head in disbelief, “I shoulda known Uncle Stan’s heap of a carriage would fall apart.”

After further debate, we agreed that we’d just wait it out until the carriage is fixed. As much as we rather not ride the carriage, Uncle Stan was quite particular about his belongings. Even borrowing it took a bit of convincing on our part.

“Well, how about some lunch Flam?”

We make our way to the town square to a little café. We get some odd looks from a variety of ponies.

Flim nudges me, “Looks like these folks haven’t forgotten about the cider incident.”

OF COURSE! How could I forget about that? No wonder they’re looking at us all funny. Oh well, can’t do anything about that now. Might as well make the best out of this situation.

We order our food and agree that the next course of action is to find a place to rest.

Just as I am about to bite into my sandwich, a familiar little filly walks into the café. What was her name again? Apple Bloom! That was it!

She recognises us as well and hops on over. I half expected her to turn away in disgust after what we did but she smiles at us.

“Well, if it isn’t Mr. Flim and Flam. What brings ya here around to these parts? You ain’t gonna try to take our farm away from us again are ya?” she says playfully in her own twang.

“No sirree, little filly. We just happen to be passing by into town when our carriage broke down” I reply.

It’s truly amazing how little ones can be a lot more forgiving than the older ponies.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear that. Do you need a place to stay? If not, I could take you to the Bed and Breakfast and help you get sorted.”

I look and Flam and saw that his face had lit up at the mention of the B&B. O Brother!

FLAM

I’ve got a soft spot for Bed and Breakfast places. There’s just something about a cosy lil B&B that gets to me. Of course, only Flim knows of this.

The little filly with the bow in her mane leads us to the place. She opens the door and immedeatly I see an odd mare talking to herself.

“But if I add butterscotch would it taste too sweet? Maybe a little bit of lemon drops instead? No, no, that won’t do! Should I make something spicy maybe?”

She is busy scribbling down something on a piece of paper and she is so caught up in whatever she is that she doesn’t notice us.

Apple Bloom merely looks on.

What kind of service is this?!

Irritated, I bang my hoof on the table.

She looks up and I see that her eyes are a cotton candy sort of blue.

“Oh, urm, sorry, I didn’t notice you coming in.” she replies, blowing her pink stripe out of her face.

“Hey Bon Bon, I was wondering if you could help check these fellas in for awhile.”

She turns to Apple Bloom, “Oh sure, I could do that.”

The little filly then waves her hoof goodbye and carries on her away as swiftly as she came.

Flim comes over to me and whispers, “Hey Flam, I’m gonna take a look around town. You can handle this right?”

I sigh. Always playing the elder brother.

“Yeah sure, have fun. I’ll probably be here the rest of today anyway.”

The mare with the pale cream coat looks at me with a beaming smile, “May I please know your name sir?”

“It’s Flam. My brother’s name is Flim.”

She writes it down and then suddenly cries out, “NOW I REMEMBER! You came here trying to take Sweet Apple Acres.”

I smile wryly.

“Don’t worry, this is not a business visit.”

“Well, whatever it is, it’s none of my business. I’m Bon Bon and welcome to Meadow Mines B&B.”

In about 20 minutes, I settle into the accommodation that she has prepared for us.

Odd little pony that one…


I put down the book that I was reading. It’s getting darker and there’s still no sign of Flim anywhere.

What is he up to?

Flim finally trots in with a huge smile on his face. This is a different smile from usual. I’ve seen all his smiles. He’s got his sales stallion smile and a few others but this is a strange one.

“Had fun on your excursion, O brother of mine?”

He only nods, “It was…pleasant. I’m gonna take a shower.”

“Oooookay. Don’t hurt yourself.”

Something is definitely up with him. I can’t quite put my hoof on it though…

The salespony who couldn't...

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FLAM

I awake the next morning to find Flim still sleeping as he usually does.

“Hey Flim, you wanna wake up and get some breakfast with me?”

Flim mumbles sleepily, “No, may..be la...ter. You…ahead.”

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother with this brother of mine…

I trot down the stairs to the reception to ask about breakfast. Instead of Bon Bon, I find an elderly mare at the counter, whom I assume to be the actual owner of this B&B.

“Why you must be the brothers who’ve just checked in yesterday.” The mare says with a friendly smile.

“Quite right, Ma’am. I’m Flam and my brother Flim is still asleep upstairs. And you must be the owner of this lovely place?”

“Oh, what a charmer you are. Yes, my name’s Caring Bright,” she replies.

I look around the place, wondering if Bon Bon was working here today.

“If you’re looking for Bon Bon, she’s busy working on her recipes. I’m sure you’d like some breakfast, young sir?”

I shake my head, “Oh, no, no, no. I wasn’t looking for anypony in particular. I wouldn’t mind some breakfast though.”

Caring shoots me a suspicious look and laughs, “Breakfast should be served in a minute. I’ll show you to the dining table.”

I follow her into the dining room where a few other guests were already seated. There is a travelling poet by the name of William; a family, whose patriarch, serves in the Royal Guard (Murray is his name, seems like a nice fellow) and a pair of sisters on an adventure around Equestria (Lila and Rosemary).

William and I are in the middle of conversing about the places that we’ve visited when in walks Bon Bon with a trolley of breakfast delights.

“Good morning everypony. Hope you all slept well,” she says as she starts putting food on the table.

Everyone responds accordingly before beginning to devour the breakfast fare of toasted oats, eggs and a selection of pastries with orange juice.

As soon as everypony is done with their food, they leave.

“Oh, you can just leave it, Flam. Bon Bon has got it covered.” Lila tells me, as she stand up from the table.

As soon as her name is mentioned, she appears.

“Oh, hey there Flam. Did you enjoy your breakfast?”

“Yes, it was delicious. Did you cook everything?”

“Uhum, been doing it since I was a little filly after all. Here I’ll just take your dishes from you,” she says, reaching for his plate.

“It’s okay, I’ll bring it to the kitchen myself”.

“NO! You don’t hav…” I hear her shout as I make my way to the kitchen.

WHAT IN THE GOOD NAME OF CIDER HAPPENED HERE?

There is sugar everywhere. Everywhere! Even on the ceiling! Peppermints strewn on the floor and the smell of lemon is strong in the air.

I place my plate on the counter and turn to look at her.

“See, this is why I told you to just pass me the plates,” she says as she rolls the trolley to the sink.

“HOW IN CELESTIA’S MANE DID IT GET THIS MESSY?”

“Well, I was working on some new candy recipes and this just sorta happened. I’ll clean it up after I’m done with the recipes.”

“No, ma’am. I will not let this be!”


An hour later, we got the kitchen to its most tip-top condition.

“My goodness, you’re one heck of a slave driver, aren’t ya Flam?” Bon Bon says chuckling.

OH DARN! I’ve done it again!

I fix my hat nervously, “I’m sorry, it wasn’t my place to do something like this. I’m just a bit of a neat freak.”

She just bursts out laughing. I look at her quizzically.

“Why are you laughing?”

“HAHAHA, a bit? You think?” she manages to get out as she gestures to the now sparkling kitchen.

I can’t help but laugh along with her.

FLIM

I hear Flam laughing maniacally from downstairs. Well, that’s new. It’s almost noon. Hmmm, guess I should make myself decent.

I wander downstairs and it seems that they’re still conversing and laughing. Ah well, maybe I’ll get some food in town. I leave a note at the reception for Flam and gallop to the market place.

Maybe some baked goods will help.

“Hey there, Mr. Flim!” a familiar voice calls out to me.

I smiled at the little filly, “Well, well, it’s lil Miss Apple Bloom. How are you doing, my dear?”

“Not too bad, just helping Applejack sell some apples and things. Care to buy some?”

“WHAT IN TARNATION? Apple Bloom, you should know better than to make friends with the salesponies who tried to take our farm!” Applejack yells out.

“B-but…Didn’t you teach me to forgive people for their mistakes? Maybe that’s all it was.” Apple Bloom replies.

Oh, such a kind little filly this one is. Naïve indeed…but kind.

“I’d like to properly extend my apologies for our last encounter, Miss Applejack and now as salespony to another, I’d like to make a business transaction and purchase whatever you have left to sell.”

“You have got ta be kidding me. You think you can come here and just act like everything’s fine and dandy? Well, I’m not gonna fall for your tricks. You can just take your business transaction with ya, Mister!” Applejack responds.

I know where I’m not wanted.


Should’ve seen this coming I guess. I mean after what we did…

“Say, this is good. What tea is this Mr.Timmons?” I ask him as I sip the tea at the counter.

“That’s my own special brew. I call it ‘Light Happiness’. You look like you could use it,” the elderly stallion replies with a twinkle in his eye. His green tea coloured coat goes well with his light brown mane, I must say.

The sound of classical music being played on the cello fills the air and I close my eyes taking in the beautiful melody. Da dum, da dum…

“She plays beautifully doesn’t she?” he asks me.

“Indeed she does. It lifts up your soul like a good tea on a cold winter’s night.”

“You sure you’re not a poet like William there, Flim?” Mr.Timmons asks me teasingly.

I don’t respond but merely turn towards the sound of the music. With her dark grey mane and grey coat, you can tell that this lady is…classy. She silently screams sophistication. Octavia…Such a fitting name too.

She finishes her song and comes to the counter and takes a seat. Right next to me!

“Could I get my usual tea please, Mr.Timmons?” she says. Even her voice sounds enchanting!

“You sure can my dear. Coming right up!” Mr.Timmons responds and proceeds to making the requested cup.

Ok, all you need to do is say…Hi, my name is Flim. You are very talented. I’m a salespony! I can do this!

I turn to face her. She catches my eye and smiles curiously.

“H-huma-heee- heee…Fl-fl-fl- ya-----ie”

WHAT THE HECK DID I JUST SAY?!