A single letter from the Royal Expeditionary Ambassador to the Princesses begins a tale of foreign discovery, intrigue, danger - and snakes. Lots of snakes.
As expansive as the realm of Equestria and the known kingdoms surrounding it may be, the quest for exploration and discovery is unending! It is this very quest that has led Royal Expeditionary Ambassador Lean-To of his majesties' royal service to discover an unknown land - and the unique inhabitants living there.
NOTE: I'm calling this Complete. It started as a silly one-off thing anyway, and while I tried to see how it could continue, I don't have the inspiration or drive to move this story forward. Just a little AU headcanon idea. Thanks to those who enjoyed my drabbles. =)
From the Field Desk of Lean-To, Royal Expeditionary Ambassador of Equestria, PhD.
Dear Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,
I could hardly stand to wait the appropriate length of time needed to gather data before composing this letter to Your Highnesses. My team's journey into the newly discovered lands of Centropi has revealed a most exciting discovery - a new species of pony! Or, at least, they share many traits with us ponies, but, well… just see the attached artistic renditions of a few I’ve met!
They call themselves Equutaurs. They are quite the exotic race, possessing strange and vivid colorations and a variety of insect-like traits. Not quite like the Breezies or Changelings we are previously familiar with - while smaller than ponies, they are in general as tall as my chest, and do not possess a hard outer carapace or shapeshifting abilities. It is more like the soft countenance and striking patterns of a moth or butterfly. Stranger still, they have six legs! The foremost pair are rarely walked upon, although I have seen it done; they keep their head and upper torso bent upright, using their forelegs much as a young dragon might use his hands. I am equally intrigued that, unlike other pony-esque races we have encountered, these share similar divisions to our species: Earth Pony, Pegasus, and Unicorn, after a fashion.
The “Earth Ponies” (they call themselves Tenders) have neither wings nor horn, although they do sport a pair of flexible antennae. The Tender whose appearance I have recorded for this letter is Glamour, one of the first Equutaurs I encountered. She has a rather… bold-tempered personality, but is a decent enough host. She appears to find great disdain in our “inefficient” lack of a third pair of hooves, making the occasional snide remark when I have to stand three-legged to hold something, or write with my mouth. I am proud to say that my team and I have handled ourselves with proper decorum, although there was a very small row between Glamour and Dust Devil that we had to quell last Thursday. Something about the proper way to encourage growth magic – yes, much as Earth Ponies, the Tenders have a talent for tending the land. Plant care doesn’t appear to be Glamour’s particular special talent, but that doesn’t stop her from having an opinion on it. Have no fear, my lieges, no serious strains on our relations resulted. (And Dust Devil has thoroughly apologized for the pie that became unfortunately involved.)
The “Pegasi” are strange in that their wings are as lacking in uniformity of shape as the variety of moth and butterfly species they resemble. These Gliders work with the weather and sky animals, although they also seem to share an ability to coordinate with insects. It is quite a sight to see: swarms of butterflies in formation, blowing clouds across the sky at careful command. The Glider I’ve shown here, Mothby (pronounced “Moh-th-bee”) is a very friendly sort and has been teaching me Glider cloudbusting formations. He seems quite taken with my Pegasus ability to make especially sharp turns, but the larger wings of the Gliders make for much more efficient wind-makers despite the smaller size of the Gliders. Mothby is going to show me his moth training facility tomorrow; I am quite excited and am certain my allergy to pollen won't be an issue.
Lastly, and in some ways most uniquely, are the “Unicorns”, here known as Crafters, presumably because a large majority of them are tasked with magically creating the tools and materials used by other Equutaurs. Earthen Spell is a sweet-natured Pony – excuse me, Equutaur – and very helpful in our studies. She is shown here demonstrating her spell for creating an ore-locating orb. When asked why she did not simply create a spell that could locate the ore directly, she made the very valid point that this would require a Crafter to be on hoof anytime somepony needed to find the ore, whereas the orb could be used multiple times by anypony. Crafters also possess the antennae common of their race, but with a unique “twist” – aha, pardon my pun. They are born with their antennae twisted into a spiral, with the two larger flagellum at the tips bonded together. This somehow allows them to manipulate magical particles in much the same way as the material of a Unicorn’s horn. Both parties have agreed to allow the other to study their unique ways of doing magic.
If there are Alicorn equivalents in their culture, I have not met one, but they do have a Princess, so it is possible that she will prove to be the missing example. I am pleased to say that despite some early difficulties, communication is going well; Tongue Twister did have a bit of trouble with the translation spell. Their language sounds quite backwards… I apologize, that sounds awful, what I mean to say is that it literally sounds as though they are speaking our language backwards. Tongue Twister assures me this is not actually the case, but the comparison somehow made it easier to apply the spell on ourselves that allows our gracious hosts to understand us.
Overall, they are a peaceable race, hospitable and helpful if a bit puzzled and/or patronizing at times. Opinions on our lesser number of limbs and "clumsy" size have ranged from sympathy, as if we were the victims of a mass racial handicap, to a sort of thinly-veiled disdain (see Glamour), but mostly there is only general confusion. Considering our own reactions to them, I suppose this was a fairly-exchanged emotion. They do possess ignorance on a few matters (they seemed to find it quite suspicious when we claimed your highnesses’ duties of directing the Sun and Moon – as if the great orbs could move on their own volition!), but considering some of the mysterious details of daily life that they themselves have claimed, we are moving forward in an attitude of equality and mutual exchange of information.
I am to meet with their leader, Princess Sfeera, in a few days. I will be sure to update you as our venture progresses.
Signed, Your loyal servant, Lean-To
P.S. A intriguing note - the Equutaurs seem surprised that we made it to them unmolested by somebeasts called "gorgons"? I will write on it when I learn more.
[On a sticky note attached to the letter before sending]
Requested Supplies: Paper Oats That mosquito balm Dust Devil forgot to pack A spell recipe for warding off mosquitoes Copy of Withering Neigh's Guide To Defeating The Bloodsucking Buggers Of The World, Volume Three: M-V [Scribbled in a different hoof]Newest print of Power Ponies, for research purposes, not entertainment in any way
From the Desk of Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the Night, Diarch of Equestria, Princess Luna
To: Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the Day, Diarch of Equestria, Princess Celestia
We have received a most fascinating report from our royal expeditionary ambassador to the West, Lean-To and company, whom We did send to explore the uncharted lands across the Pacifist Ocean some months back – thou dost remember attending the planning meeting, We are sure, it was a most important undertaking for Us. Why thou hast not put more efforts into such explorations in the last thousand years, We continue to shake our head at, but that is unimportant at this time. This most exciting news is that a new species of pony has been discovered – or rather, we (Lean-To and We) assume it is new, since We have found no mention of them among the Royal Archivist’s records, and We really would have expected you to mention such a notable development in Our weekly "Getting Up To Date" classes.
We know thou art quite occupied with the diplomatic discussions in the Gryphon kingdom, but We believed this to be that which would hold thy highest interest, and so We are forwarding you a copy of the missive. We have included a copy of Lean-To’s sketches, a bit amateurish but bearing what We think to be an accurate likeness of these new ponies. Write me Us back immediately with thy thoughts.
Six limbs! Six limbs, Tia Celestia! And eight for these Gliders he speaks of, not even considering the antennae, and tails nearly count, as well, canst thou imagine needing to coordinate so many mobile extremities? The excitement is making Us break proper letter-writing decorum, and thou wilt no doubt find Lean-To’s report of more interest than my letter describing it. We look forward to hearing your thoughts on this matter, sister.
Sincerely,
Princess Luna
P.S. Write me back IMMEDIATELY or We may die of impatience! We would like to open up consideration of the idea that one of us (you or Ourself) embark on a diplomatic mission immediately to yonder lands of Centropi, and We volunteer, because We really, really, really wish to see the new insect ponies in person.
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From the Guest Quarters of Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the Day, Diarch of Equestria, Princess Celestia, currently visiting the Gryphon Kingdom
Dear Luna,
I would politely like to mention that you don’t need to use the royal We in letters to me, especially private ones. We stopped requiring it even in formal mail decades ago; it gets incredibly confusing when referring to more than two ponies. Although it is amusing trying to sort out your pronouns.
Now, as to Lean-To’s letter – and of course I remembered, you wouldn’t talk of anything else for the two months it took to get those teams equipped and sent out – this is fascinating news! I’m afraid you’re right, our missions of exploration stagnated a bit while you were on the moon; I never found it as interesting as you do. (Yes, I know that that is bad reason, but you try running an entire country by yourself for a thousand years! And I thought sometimes that the Moon became heavier after you went there.) So I have not heard of such a thing. Considering some of our other recent discoveries when it comes to sentient races, I am pleased to hear that this one sounds much friendlier than the Changelings, although I’m beginning to wonder if the Creator had a particular fondness for making pony races that look like insects.
Of course, we should encourage Lean-To to continue in his studies of this new people group, especially since he and his team seem to have already established good diplomatic relations. I would not recommend teleporting off to visit when we don’t even know anything about their leadership yet! Have some patience, Luna, and let the stallion do his job. If things continue to go well, of course we’ll set up some sort of Royal Visit between our nations, and you’re welcome to it – jungle environments mess with my allergies like nopony’s business.
I’ll leave you in charge of corresponding with the team, but of course I’d like to be kept in the loop! Thank you for forwarding the letter on. Your loving sister,
Tia
P.S. Try not to drive Lean-To crazy; you know you get a little overzealous when it comes to science. Remember the incident in Embossnia.
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From the Desk of Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the Night, Diarch of Equestria, Princess Luna
To: Celestia
Well, if you insist, Tia, although We I find it perplexing how many of the Royal Decorums have gone lax over the hoof-ful of centuries I was gone. But I suppose ‘tis evident that anarchy has not enveloped the kingdom, and it is significantly less confusing to speak in plain terms, however much it dost decrease the royal dignity of our office.
Yes, it is greatly encouraging that these Equutaurs appear to be hospitable. Who is to say what we will learn – if their ruler is truly an alicorn of the atmosphere, this could create great inroads in our meteorological research! And what if they are not ponies who look like insects, but insects who appear as ponies? It raised the royal curiosity greatly, but I will take your council and wait patiently for more of Lean-To’s reports; my first response will be sent out post-haste.
I will be pleased to accept the agreed-upon undertaking in due time, as you’re quite right that I would be superior for the job. (Speaking of that visit to the Kingdom of Embossnia, it is to my recollection that you developed that terrific rash after eating one of the local dishes – although banning the importation of all dragonfruit to our kingdom may have been an extreme reaction on your part.) I will keep you informed as things progress.
Your favorite sister,
Luna
P.S. Was that comment about the moon’s heaviness a reference to my weight? I’ll have you know I am a lithe willow wand, and thou ate much more cake than I at Cranky Doodle’s wedding!
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From the Desk of Her Royal Highness, Ruler of the Night, Diarch of Equestria, Princess Luna
To: Royal Expeditionary Ambassador Lean-To & Company
We are most pleased to hear of this new discovery. Truly, our knowledge of our world is ever-expanding, and this is yet another demonstration of how much we have still to learn. Princess Celestia and I trust thee to go forward with greatest care and cultural sensitivity so that we may establish friendly relations with the Equutaurs.
We eagerly await your next report. Our personal interests lie particularly in this ruler and her magical role in nature; unique differences in magical abilities between their and our analogous unicorn races; and this mysterious mention of gorgons, which was very teasing of you to mention before thou hadst further data. If you must, dictate thy conversations to us in thy letters, so that we might not miss anything of import. I can send all the extra paper you need, should you wish it; 'tis the benefit of being Royal Benefactor to Canterlot's premier paper factory.
But I apologize, I am telling thou how to do thy job. You have our blessing and may extend to this Princess Sfeera Equestria’s royal hoof of friendship on our behalf.
Sincerely,
Your Royal Highness, Princess of the Night, Diarch of Equestria
Princess Luna
Addendum: A crate of the requested supplies is on its way, although the royal archivist was unable to secure a copy of the newest print of the Power Ponies publication without creating a new subscription. They have requested that you send the customer information of the one making the request.