Prologue, or as i call it B.M. (Before Me) . . . ha, bm
"Starlight, we found him"
Starlight Glimmer turned to see one her "friends", the princess of friendship enter her room, Twilight, to anyone normal would look creepy, with her dull colors, braided hair and big creepy grin, but not to Starlight who looked at her in shock instead of fear.
"Are you sure!"
"He was hiding in the Everfree Forest, me, Celestia, and the other girls caught him off guard and stunned him"
"Good job Twilight, take me to see him please"Starlight asked while grabing the Staff of Sameness and her saddle bags and following Twilight out the door, putting the staff in her bag. It had been four months since The Main Six had become members of the small village they called home, but in that time Starlight had decided to, with help from the six, to spread her beliefs all across Equestria. The Six' influence helped her cause spread like wildfire, there were those who would resist, like the the other princesses and their newest "friend", but they were dealt with quickly, Celestia and Cadence were excepted into what was now called The Same Lands and had become full members a month and a half ago, Luna had gone into hiding, which left Canterlot easy to take, and as Canterlot fell so to did most of Equestria and the Crystal Empire.
As Starlight thought about what led up to this they had reached their destination, where their captive was just waking up.
To say Discord was having a bad day would be the understatement of the century, he was found by his traitorous friend Fluttershy, chased down like a criminal, cornered like an animal, knocked out by Twilight, and was just now waking up to find himself in a magic-proof jail cell. As he tried to shake the disorientation out of his body the door to the outside world had opened to reveal his former friend and the little bitch who started all this walk in.
"Good morning Discord" Starlight said calmly but with a hint of arrogance, Discord just gave a grunt and turned his face away from them.
"Buck off", was all he said to the two.
"My my such language, we only want to talk to you", Starlight said with with a look of false surprise and sadness; she knew that she wouldn't be able to just talk Discord into becoming one of them, to stand out was in his nature, but anyone could become equalized, three of the four princesses proved that.
"Well I'm not interested in joining your little community, not that I have a choice in the matter now do I?",he stated with a snarl. Starlight just smirked, she loved to break down those tough ones.
"We just want to become better friends by removing what makes us so different, what makes us different from other"
"Well in case you didn't know I don't really have a Cutie Mark so there is nothing to take" he said gesturing to what could be considered his flank which was blank.
"The Staff can take more than just Marks, anythig that makes you different, even your form, within reason" she said as the rage on Discord's face turned into one of confusion.
"What are you talking about"
"The staff can turn you into a pony, the only problem is that it can't change you into different pony species, which means that until I find a way to give the staff more power we can't trully be equal in all aspects, including sub species" and with that pulled the staff out of her bags.
"but we'll worry about that later all that matters now is that you learn how better life is when your just like everybody else", with that his confusion was replaced with fear, she was going to take away everything that made him him and he couldn't defend himself, they put a charm on him when he was out that blocked him from using his magic, in desperation he turned to Twilight.
"Twilight don't let her do this, please I don't want to be another face in the crowd, I want to be me." he said as he started panicing. Twilight looked at him with sincere pity and simpathy, he didn't understand how great it was to have no differences, no way to make anyone jealous, how would he, he only recently just became friends and at a time when she still believed that your differences were a good thing, she and her friends led him to believe that, she now felt as though she failed him as a friend by not showing him true friendship, as he curled up scared of what was to come she went to him and prepared a spell to knock him out.
"Don't worry when you wake up I'll help you learn what true friendship is all about" that was all he heard before the spell made contact and he passed out.
As Starlight used her magic to take away his magic and turn into an earth pony, the chaos magic that was within him slowly started to shrink until it dissapated into nothingness, as Starlight and Twilight left the jailhouse unbeknown to anyone the entire planet planet shuddered, then, depp within the Everfree Forrest something incredible happened, the chaos magic that had once lived in Discord had appeared and opened up portals to different universes, it seemed to be looking for somthing, it stopped in front of one portal, ont that showed a young man, about 5'9" with dirty blonde hair, green eyes, and glasses. he wore a tattered pair of jeans and a plain white T-shirt and seemed to be looking up things on the computer, the "saw" that it had multiple tabs open on it, one that said TeamFourStar, one that said Sonic Comic, one that said Markiplier, and one that said Pokemon Omega Ruby, the tab that was opened showed the first two episodes of season five of MLP. The room he was in had all kinds of random things ranging from Dragon Ball Z, to Pokemon, to Star Wars, and even things form My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. The magic listened to the man rant on about how if in the Mane Six' position he would fight to the bitter end,
"I would much rather die than lose my originality, I mean seriously, everyone the same, now that sounds fucking boring", with those words the magic knocked the young man out and proceeded to pull him into the portal, after they both made it through the magic went inside of the man, inbuing him with powers beyond anything he ever imagined and setting him on a journey that would-
(Narrator was hit by a charged Home-run Bat swing and killed ala Super Smash Bros style, the attacker was the young man just described)
Sorry homes, but this is my story and I'm gonna tell it my way, Deadpool style, with forth wall breaks all around. So this is the beginning of my story of how I bullshit my way through saving Equestria, with kickass powers over reality.