> Knock. Knock. > by Arreis Of Avalon > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > ... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I moved out of my bed, my hooves clopping on the floor. In my magic, I held a candle. It was not very bright, though it was somewhat bright. Was it bright enough? Who could tell. I moved to my mirror and stared deeply into my grey eyes. I did not blink. I had to see. Just to see. I was awake, after all. There was a pounding at the door. My ears twitched. I stared deeply into my grey eyes. My house creaked around me. The pounding continued. I tried to ignore it. I did. “Something woke me up,” I whisper to my reflection. Her mouth does not move. The bags under her eyes grow darker, redder. Her eyes move toward the window. I can see a tree outside. It is laughing. “Did a window break somewhere,” I ask her. She does not answer. The creaking gets louder. The laughing gets closer. I whisper further, “or did the door open?” I hope the door is not open. I think of my journal. I hope the door did not open as I think of my journal; that would not be good, my journal says. I think it does, at least. Maybe. I’m sure it says that. My hooves clop against the floor as I walk through the doorway to the hall. Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. “It will be hard to find.” I refer, obviously, to the window. Obviously. Not the pounding. Relentless, it was. The window breaking, I mean. The laughing went away. “This is a huge home,” I said out loud, “with tens of rooms. But I haven’t looked in all of them for a long time.” The hallway creaks. No one responds. Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. Thunder rolls. There is no storm. I hold my head with a sigh. “I’ve been feeling so exhausted lately.” I’m in my room. “What a migraine! As if somepony is pounding a hole in my poor skull.” My magic holds onto my candle. The light above me will stay on. It is a lantern. Lanterns stay lit. Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. I look at the door. “I’m terribly tired. I’ve even started to sleepwalk. Last night I woke up standing right here at the door.” I gulp. The face behind me is leering into the back of my head. It is only a mask. My father owned it. “If it hadn’t been bolted, I would have ended up outside! At night, this door has to be locked securely.” Clo-reak-Clo-reak-Clo-reak-Clo-reak. I am by my telescope. The pounding resumes. The light above me blows out. My skulls rest soundly around me. “I’m exhausted. I just can’t fall asleep. And then in the dark I keep seeing some strange thing.” A light creak. “By morning, the nightmares are gone, though. How much longer till sunrise?” The light above me sparks. So does my horn. I have to put down the candle to fix the light. I put it down and lean up to the light, using my magic to fix it. My magic is black. It has no light. The candle does not work without my magic and it goes out. I cannot explain my candle. I slowly fix my light. The world around me shifts. It creaks. It pounds. It laughs. I don’t know what it is. I hold my candle again. My light is on. It is bright in my room. It is bright in this room too, now. This room was a hallway moments ago, but that does not matter now. The room is bright. The pounding is insistent now. I shuffle back to the door as quickly as I can, nearly a canter, holding my candle with magic. I walk to the door. There is no noise. I walk back to the telescope. I stop; there is no sound. “Wait a minute.” I look around. “What happened to time? It feels like time is standing still.” I glare at the darkness growing around me - my lights are bad here. I just changed this light, but it will be bad soon. Worse. “Why doesn’t this night ever end? Something is very wrong.” I continue walking. There is no reason not to. Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. Noise. Knock-Knock-Knock. I turn to the door but turn away; no one’s home. I put down my candle and fix the light in the hallway. Click-Crea-Click-Creak. My ears keep twitching at each little noise. Light floods the small hallway. I can go up, or to the side. I go to the side. There is another lightbulb. I drop my candle and go to fix the light. Creeeak…. I keep fixing it. Crak-le-crek-crackle. I don’t know what the clicking crackling is. It sounds weird. I ignore it as best I can. It sounds like it’s right beside me. The room is pitch black without my candle. I want my candle. I want light. This bulb takes a while. I turn. I turn. It cracks. I turn. It creaks. I turn. Light floods the empty room. There is a window. It is black. There is a ladder down. There is light there. No one is here. I walk down the ladder quickly. There is a clock there. It looks like me. It always does. I walk to it and change time. “This is how it’s done. I can wind up the time too. If the morning is not coming to me, I’ll move myself and my home towards it.” The clock disappears. I look around the room. Something is amiss. What could it be? I have a shiver in my bones - the door creaks open. Did it? Did it really? I have to check. Just to be sure I locked the door. Surely I did. I run upstairs. Clopclopclopclop. I can’t help it. I walk as fast as I can to the door. Each room is somewhat darker than it had been before. My skulls look sadder as I pass them. They seem to shudder. I gallop to the door. It is wide open. “So, the sound of knocking came from here! But how did I manage to unbolt it? And not lock it again?” I look out into the night. It is dark. There are woods. It is terrifying. “... It’s… frightening to go out at night. But I have to check. To make sure that it’s just the wind.” I step outside. I am deep in the woods. How did I get here? My candle is with me. It does little. There are laughing trees all around me. Clop. Clop. Clop. Clop. I keep walking. It is very dark. Laughter is still all around me. Why is laughter here? Why do the trees laugh? I walk faster. Clop clop. Clop clop. Crickets are chirping. They are the only noise - are they? Is something behind me? I can’t see well. I run through the trees, dodging anything that may be in my path. I’m scared. I run fast. Clipclopclipclopclipclopclipclop! I’m panting. My breath is shallow. My heart is racing my hooves. My house creaks as I near it. I am galloping. My candle flickers in the wind. Something is coming for me. I run and lock the door. I am inside. I awaken. > .... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I shift around on my bed and stand, my hooves scratching up the rotting tiles as I do. My candle is with me. I am awake, now. “What’s that noise,” I whisper to myself. My ears twitch - ticking? “It’s the clock, ticking… I’m finally awake, now.” I glance out the window - blackness. “And as usual, in the early hours of the morning. It’ll be sunrise soon.” I hear a creak somewhere in the house. It is just the house settling. I’m sure of it. “... For now, I’ll just check if everything’s all right. I dreamt that the front door was unlocked.” I thought about the dream, staring at the floor. My shadow danced around me. I spoke to it. “Someone was knocking. I had to get up and look. Then I regained consciousness in the forest and could hardly find my way back.” I look at my bed. I hide behind it; just testing it, of course. Behind the bed, my candle does not light the room, and all looks dark. I quickly stop hiding. The dark is scary. I shuffle towards the door. Clop. Creak. Clop. Creak. It’s locked, and takes me a minute to open. The door swings open and I walk into a dim hallway. Another broken light. I set down the candle and turn it. Time speeds up as I do. Actions cause time to go again. Light burns my eyes as I pick up my candle again. “Just a minute. I’ll wait for my eyes to adjust.” I stay still for a few moments. The light seems dimmer the longer I stand still. It helps. I walk to the door and open it too. It swings open after a few moments. “I don’t even recognize my own home,” I whisper. “Why does it look so empty?” It shouldn’t be empty, should it? Where are the pictures and bookshelves and memories? Gone. No one home. “It’s probably just my eyesight going bad,” I mutter, glancing around in the darkness. “My eyesight’s getting worse and worse after dark.” I take a deep breath. “It doesn’t matter. I only have to wait a little longer. Soon it’ll be daybreak.” I walk into the darkness. My candle does little. I walk under another broken lightbulb as my ears twitch; there is noise, somewhere. “During my nightly rounds, it is vital to turn on the light in each room for a little while. It’s the only way to put everything back in order.” Order. That’s all I ever wanted. Order, and a break from this nightmare. “A scientifically proven fact: if the home is kept in order, then the nightmares will go away.” I fix the light. The dark is scary, but order is more important than safety. The light comes in due time. I am by my telescope. The skulls gape at me in wonder at my mastery of the light. “Finally. Everything’s in it’s place. I can see it clearly.” I stop, thinking. The skulls seem to think too. The lights flicker. “Something is wrong with my head. I’m still half - asleep.” I shut my eyes softly, exhausted. I open them again; my clock is behind me. I go to it and wind it up. The lights all go out as I do. Time does not like my lights. I will have to turn them on again. I still wind; daybreak is more important than sanity. The clock disappears. I am hiding in this time. Why am I hiding? My eyes are covered - I cannot see what I am hiding from. If I open my eyes, if something is out there, it will see me. Should I look? I step out hesitantly. I see nothing. My candle is the only source of light. “All I need is to last until sunrise. Dawn will put everything into it’s place.” I think I hear something upstairs. Lightning strikes nearby. I gulp. "There turned out to be nothing,” I try to reassure myself. “Daybreak is very close now. I just have to survive until dawn.” I urge myself to go downstairs. Turning on the light will put all the rooms in order. Perhaps turning on the light downstairs will put it to order too? I go down the ladder only to hear loud static. I try to ignore the static and just make my way to the light. I turn and it clicks and it crackles. I get halfway through fixing it when the door begins to pound. It sounds angry. I turn quickly towards my ladder and rush to head upstairs. There is no place to hide, down here. I run through the upstairs, scared. My skulls watch me, and each looks as though they are laughing. I turn on each light as I go. I go up further. It is pitch black in this room. I run to the nearest light and begin to fix it. Do not - Don’t… no… yo- keep th-- house. I look around as the light comes on, eyes wide. Nopony home. Nopony here. I run into the next room, trying to shake the whispering from my mind. It wasn’t real. I get to the bulb and start to turn. No need. There is a sharp crack and a long creak. The light comes on. Nopony there. I run to the next door. I shut my eyes for a moment. I’m exhausted. I open them. My bed is in this room, now. I don’t know how, but it is. The light turns off. “Who… just sighed? Is someone here?” It is right… behind you… I turn quickly. A pony stands in a white gown, a box for a head. Cracks appear in the walls. The pony is gone. The lightbulb cracks. I am in the room adjacent. “I shouldn’t have turned on that light! Something was wrong in there!” I think. “Actually, everything is wrong in this house. Once again, everything is different. What is real?” I look at the door but decide against returning to that room. I trod to the ladder and walk down. At least I have my candle. I walk into my bedroom - the real one. The door to the outside is gone. Nothing can get inside. So where did that pony come from? I hear creaking. I turn back and walk towards the hallway. I stop in the hallway. I was sure it came from here, but now it almost sounds right on top of me. Upstairs? I hear pounding. It can’t be on my door, however. Where is it? Knock Knock Knock. Where was it coming from? It knows where you are. I turn away from the black telescope room, or what should be the black telescope room. “I have to hide! I don’t know why but I have to hide, now!” I run towards the bedroom - I can always hide under my bed. I know that. As I run, the lightbulb blows out. There is a one legged pony in the darkness. I don’t know how it follows me, but it does. The straightjacket around it trails along behind it, the strings to hold it to it’s hooves dragging. I run. I do not scream. I have no voice now to scream. I run into the dark telescope room. The pony whispers while I run, but I cannot hear it. My heart pounds too loudly to hear it. I do make out one sentence in my mad gallop. It is inside. Clipclopclipclopclipclop! I dash behind the telescope and cover my eyes. I shake and tremble but make not a sound. I cannot let it find me, under any circumstance. I feel it’s eyes on me. I can feel each and every breath tingle down my neck. My fur stands on end. I want to cry, but I do not in fear of making any noise. I can’t make any sound. Nopony home. Where… are y- come out! It watches for so long. Time exists no longer; every clock has stopped ticking. I stay behind that telescope for eternity. I cannot even breath to calm my heart. How does it not hear it racing? The light flickers. I step back out, the feeling starting to dissipate. I take a deep breath. I am fine. I am calm. I was not found. “This is some game… Brings me back to my childhood. You hide and feel how the time starts rolling backwards.” I start to make my way to my bedroom. It knows where you are. I stop in the doorway. “What’s that over there?” Static. “No. Don’t look. No light. It’s just my nerves.” Creak. “I’m not looking. Not one bit. I’m not even turning my head. There isn’t anything there.” I turn. Nothing is there. I sigh in relief and turn back again. I run as fast as I can after turning once more. I should not have looked behind me. It is there again, that one legged pony. I’m haunted by troubling thoughts, I think. They insist on crawling into my head! As if they were alive! I keep running. The pony with the box head stands before me. I freeze. She doesn’t seem to notice me. The forest is creeping inside, I think. But my home is impenetrable. The lights are off. The windows closed. The doors are all locked and bolted. I hide again and hear the static. I cover my eyes once more. I don’t want to see it all anymore. I don’t want to see it at all. The lights flash and I know she’s still there; I can hear the boxhead breathing. I know she will not leave. I run out and towards my bedroom once more. I just want to escape. I just want it to be dawn now. I want the moon to set. I get to my room. The darkness is scaring me. Reluctantly, I put down my candle and turn the light. I just need light. A few minutes in darkness will not kill me. Hopefully. I fix the light. I blink. My clock is there. I breath a sigh of relief as softly as I can and begin to wind it. The lights go off. I curse silently the darkness I had just fought. I keep winding. Dawn will fix all things. The clock disappears. I hope dawn will be soon. Creak. I freeze. Are they back? I don’t want to move. My hooves have turned to lead. I walk very slowly towards the hallway, holding my candle high. I can’t see anypony… Clop…. Clop…. Clop…. I fix the light in the hallway. Light will bring order. I hear something move in the darkness. Light floods the hallway. I’m alone. I blink, adjusting my eyes. Another clock appears. I wind. The light stays on this time. Not much longer now. I hide out in my room, though not hiding. Hiding turns back time. Winding speeds it up. Lights are bad but good. My candle will save me. Monsters are scary. The forest is coming inside. It’s already inside. The sun rises. I awaken. > ... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I stand up, moving my hooves over the side of the bed. I go ahead and put on my slippers - they will keep my hooves somewhat warmer. My home did not used to be this cold. I sigh. “In general, it’s best for the psyche to sleep soundly in the predawn hours. But lately, I’ve been awake and restless. So I decided to spend these hours checking on my house,” I say to the nothingness around me. There is nothing now, and there always will be nothing. “Let’s see if all the rooms are still where they should be.” I walk with my nothingness. It will remain with me always, here. My magic quivers, the candle in its grasp shaking. I am so exhausted. I walk into my telescope room. It is dark. I contemplate the telescope. “This house is an observatory. It’s an old science station. I’ve lived here since I was born.” I remember it in great detail; my father, living in… a large city. No. I live near a forest here. He liked the forest as there was little light pollution. My mother… I have trouble remembering. My mind is blank. I suppose it doesn’t matter. I realize I still have yet to change the light. I stand on my hind hooves and begin to fix it. KNO-CKNO-CKNOCK The pounding comes, frantically. It sounds as though they are running, and this is the only safe haven. What could they be running from? The light comes on. My skulls look fine. Everything is right, although I still fear for my sanity in these insomnia filled hours. I shrug off that fear and move to the next room. It is the hall. “I am a world-ologist,” I mutter. “That is my profession. I inherited it.” I have no idea if that’s true. It sounds right. “We, the world-ologists, watch the world. Study what it’s made of.” “We write down these findings and analyze them,” I say, looking to the darkness around me. I continue to fill the silence it provides. “And at some point, these notes could be used for scientific research.” I begin to change the light. Darkness makes poor company. I breathe an internal sigh of relief as the light flickers on. Nothing is here. All is well. I walk upstairs. I am in a study. “My father worked here before I did. Before him - my grandfather, and so on. Each one of my predecessors added something to this house. But the past is not a very valuable legacy. Which is why many rooms are locked. I never look in there.” I change the light. It creaks lightly, but that is all. It is an easy night, it seems. The room lights up, knick knacks strewn over the tables. A skull, some insects, what is hopefully a mannequin under that cloth. I continue to the next room. It is already lit. I do not ask why. There is a clock. I smile; tonight will be over quickly. I begin to wind. KNOCKNOCKNOCK. Pounding. So much pounding. They do not want dawn. It soon stops. I sigh as my clock disappears. “Thank goodness. The morning is getting nearer.” I walk to the study. The door creaks open - did it? Did it really? Perhaps I should go check. I was sure I had locked it. I go to the hallway. There are no pictures hanging here - no memories. “I don’t want to remember. It’s so repetitive anyway. My state of mind suits me just fine - the way it is right now.” I walk to my open door. “... I didn’t open this door. No one is alive out there who could have snuck in, and no one whose mind could have called me outside.” I think for a moment. “The only path here is the one that goes around my house. Right now, I can go check that there aren’t any new ones.” I contemplate my possibilities and nod. Outside it is then. I am deep in the woods. I do not know how I got here so quickly. As I walk, I think. I ponder the falling leaves. The laughing trees. I hear an owl coo, calling my name to me from the darkness. I pay it no heed. I simply want to go home. The falling leaves and cooing animals and broken trees mean nothing. A broken tree will never mean anything ever again. I keep walking, ignoring the tears rolling down my cheeks. I have not cried in years. I don’t know why I do now. Perhaps allergies. The crickets are deafening. I keep thinking I hear something over their cacophony, but nothing makes its way to my ears. Nothing, that is, until a loud, long, creak. Perhaps it was a croak? Just a toad? It sounded just like my house, though. Was I near my house? I just wanted to be home. I just wanted to be away from this terrifying place and back in my own home. I trot a little faster. Clop clop. Clop clop. The world creaks again. I cry harder, my house nowhere in sight. I’m a lost little filly, looking for her father and mother. Do I even have those anymore? Lost in these woods, I don’t know anymore. There are too many broken branches. Clop clop clop clop. I dart through the trees, running faster. I just want to be home! Why aren’t I there yet?! I hear a groan; something is following me. Clopclopclopclop! It sounds like laughing, but darker. Like the sound a grin makes. The sound is mocking my tears. I run faster; I think I see my home. Clipclopclipclopclipclopclipclop! I dart inside. I still cry as I lock the door. At least I am home. I awaken with a gasp to the sound of creaking. > ----- > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I instantly start walking; I can’t waste any time. The nightmares will haunt me if I do not move fast enough. “I’m sleeping,” I say, having finally worked that truth out in my head, “and at this point, who the hell knows what’s going on? Everything’s fallen into disrepair. Many rooms have been neglected.” I shake my head. “This house should be impenetrable! Even a little crack is a cause for serious concern, which is why I have to find and patch up every single gap. Once they’re closed - everything will go back to the way it was.” I check the right of the room; no cracks here. I’m good on that front. I walk to the only door. There’s no handle here. I hear a growl in the night. The nightmares are already coming; or are they already here? I hurry back to the door, and check again. There is a door knob there now. I quickly tug at it, trying to unlock it. The wind around the house howls, but I try to ignore it. It’s rather loud, though. The door creaks open. I trot in, my candle held high - I hear static, but cannot see the source of it. I quickly run back to my bedroom, terrified. I feel like a little filly again, terrified of little nightmares. Taking a deep breath, I turn back once more, braving the static. I begin to turn a light. I can feel the shadows around me, shifting. They have been for a long time. Such a long, long time. Why must the light take such a long, long time? I flinch as the light flashes to life. Blinking once or twice, I look around. My bed is next to me, despite the bedroom to the right. “Well… I’ve sorted things out in here. Now let’s get going.” I think about what I just said. ‘Let’s’. Let us. Who is with me? I look around, a tad bit paranoid; nopony is here. It is only me. Nopony home. I shake my head and look at the light. “Only… It’s best to turn the light off when I leave. Otherwise, I’ll worry.” Not that I don’t worry anyways. I’ve always been a worrywart. Have I? I can’t recall. “When the windows are brightly lit, I can feel someone’s penetrating eyes watching me from the outside.” I hesitate a moment. Should I listen to myself? It’s so terrifying with the lights off. Yes, I should turn it off. The darkness will be better. The darkness is always better. I turn off the light and rely on my candle. Shaking in fear, I continue trotting along. Yes - the darkness is better. The static is right behind me, but I dare not look back. I walk to the next door and begin to fiddle with it. I open it. The static is right behind me. I can see her in my minds eye now - the pony with a box as a head. I shiver in fear and keep walking, before it gets me. I quickly get to the next room and the next light and begin to fix it. The light flashes. I sigh in relief as nothing is in the room. I blink and open my eyes - there is no change. “Why does everything look so neat in here?” I pause, thinking. “Because someone cleaned it up…” I gulp. “Who cleaned it up?” I think. Who cleans for me? Didn’t I have somepony to do that for me? No. I live alone. “I did. Who else could have?” I blink again and the room changes again. “Thank goodness. Everything’s in order. I just need to remember to turn off the light when I go. Then they’ll never know that there’s somepony at home.” I don’t know exactly who they are, but I know I do not want to be found. I don’t want to be seen anymore. Not since that time. I turn off the light. Nopony home. I turn and go towards the next room. The static invades once more. It is so terribly loud. I keep walking, going a room further. The static is simply so loud. I can’t shake the feeling that something is behind me. I start to change the light. I hear low rumbles, soft whispers. I shut my eyes tightly and continue twisting the light. So loud. Everything is so loud. The light flashes on. I take a deep breath. “... I don’t want to think about the past,” I mutter. “It’s less troubling to live in the dark.” I blink. I open my eyes. I walk to the door. “Everything is locked… Thank goodness. Nothing can creep in here before morning. My home… is my fortress.” I turn off the light. Perhaps I should head back to my room. I start to head back, but gasp as I see the pony outside my room. Under that box, I can sense an evil grin. My heart begins to pound. It has me trapped. I stumble back into the last room, terrified, and quickly turn on the light. The light makes me safer. I blink, shutting my eyes to the creature. If I ignore it, it will all go away! The door slams. I flinch and my eyes open. I rush to open it; I’m terrified. I run into the next room, ready to fight the pony. It’s gone. “... I’m getting delirious. I’ve got to finish checking the house, and then go back to sleep.” I quickly shut off the light and continue walking. I have to hurry. I race downstairs, but stop halfway on the ladder - a shade. It shifts, its shadowy body phasing through the air like a gas. I race back up the stairs before it sees me, eyes wide. What in Equestria was going on in my house? My candle is shaking as my magic quivers. I expect I will drop it soon. Iii… w-want… to see…. yooou…. I am frozen in fear. Whose voice was that? It sounded so far away, yet right next to me at the same time. I shiver, my hooves trembling. I briefly consider hiding, but the darkness is not worth the terror. I click on the light and blink before shutting it off quickly. Wait… I run to the next door. I hear lights blowing far behind me. Is it that far? No. I only wish it was. I quickly tug on the door, trying to unlock it. When had I locked it again!? I curse the darkness and quickly run inside my bedroom. This isn’t my bedroom. One more room to go. This is just a room with a bed. I turn on the light and blink. Listen. I open my eyes. I turn off the light. I am alone, I am alone, I am alone. I repeat this to myself as I continue to walk, going toward the ladder. My eyes glance at the room beside me. I dart to the bed, eyes wide with fear. I can feel tears rising to them; why are these nightmares haunting me? I hide as quickly as I can, panting as the one legged pony shuffles in. I can feel it’s eyes on me; I can feel time slow as it looks for me. I try to make as little noise as I can. Nopony home. Nopony home!! Are you afraid? YES. I hear it shuffle out. I peek over the edge of the bed, crying as silently as I can. The shade has come in. I shut my eyes and resume hiding. I cannot stand the dark. I dart out. I hear it giggle. -Thought about it? Why- - is inside… I run downstairs. I don’t care anymore! Time is meaningless now! Dawn will never come now! I will be stuck in this darkness forever. The night will last forever, and it’s my fault. I quickly run to the light, trying in vain to fix it. I hear something come down the ladder. There is no hope now. The light flashes on. I’m alone. I blink. Be still. I open. Everything is in order. Everything is okay. I run upstairs, taking deep breaths. I go to fix the next light. Just when you thought about it, it came ---- The light flashes on. I think I see something - is it just the lights? I run to the next room, hearing creaking not caused by my own hooves. You thought about it, and now, it is inside. I change the next light. It flickers and breaks in my hooves. The one legged pony is right beside me. It knows where you -- I do not listen anymore. I run. I run down. I will always run now. I cannot stand it anymore! I will not face this past! I will not face what I cannot face! Down. Down I go. I keep running. I get to the lowest level. I fix the light, panting. This is the wrong house! The lights burst. I turn, almost in slow motion. The one legged pony grins, it’s eyes bleeding. It moves slowly toward me. I am trapped. I back into the corner, sobbing. Why now? Why? WHY?! You thought about it, and now, it is inside. I scream. I can feel it. I can feel the beast inside. The pony reaches me. I breathe my last breath. I awaken. > .--. .. -. -.- > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I stand, my eyes wide. My heart is fluttering. Was it all a dream? “...Someone just walked over my grave.” I walk to the door, twisting the knob. The light is bright behind me; I think I’ll leave it on this time. Perhaps light is not so bad? I walk to the next room. The static is impossibly loud. My ears twitch, but I keep twisting the light as I fix it. I blink and my bed appears as the lights flicker on. I decide to check my bedroom once more. I sniff. “... Smells like damp earth.” I wonder, has it been raining? My bedroom is fine. I come back. “In general, I need to fill this empty room with something. At the very least so I have somewhere to hide.” I blink and a pot appears. I open the next door and shuffle inside. The static is so loud. I fix the light and sigh as the static stops. “Light brings clarity. It separates the imaginary from the real. Confidence arrives with the night; which is why I anxiously await the break of day.” I blink. I open my eyes. Something has appeared; a gear of some sorts. “Why am I doing all this?... Maybe it’s not even necessary… I forgot something very important. Something that I shouldn’t even try to remember.” I walk to the next room and change the light. A light I just fixed down the hallway blows. I blink. When I open my eyes, the door slams. Just like last time a time I remember. I walk to the door. You’ve… trapped yourself… I quickly open the door. I run to the next room. The shade launches itself at me. I scream, and the sound matches the sound of the lightbulb above me breaking. It claims me, as the darkness has. I awaken. *~*~*~ I stand. “At first… I thought I was sick. But that’s not the case. I’m totally normal.” I take a deep breath. “I’m most likely compensating for something. If only I could take some time off. But it’s so frightening to leave the house now. Something is actually happening outside.” I feel myself shift, glancing at the window slyly. Only blackness. “Who is it that keeps knocking on my window? There are no trees nearby. The house is in the middle of a clearing.” Liar. I walk over to the door and open it, exhausted. I walk to the light and twist it, the floor creaking beneath me. My bed appears once more. “Why haven’t I looked in here for so long?” I stand still for but a moment, contemplating the question as my shadow dances around me. But I can’t just stand around. I need to hurry. Visitors are coming again soon. I go to the door and open it. It takes a moment. Behind me, I hear soft thumping. As soon as the door creaks open, I turn the lights off. Good. Nopony home. Next room. Twist, turn, creak. The room appears as light makes it exist. I blink and exist. My clock appears. With a sigh of relief, I begin to wind. It disappears without incident. I walk to the light. When I turn it off, I hear a nearby light bulb shatter. Visitors, so soon? I walk to the next room and begin to twist the light. Twist, turn, creak. The light turns on. My clock appears right in front of me. I begin to wind. It disappears. I close my eyes. I open them. The room is fuller now. I turn off the light and trot to the previous room. Turn on the lights. Blink. Nothing happens. I turn off the light. I go down the ladder to the downstairs. There is no storm, but lightning strikes somewhere. I feel eyes in my bedroom. Shivering, I turn on the light. Light will bring order. Believe in the light, and the sun will come someday. The sun will come for me soon. Twist. Turn. Creak. The lights turn on. I blink. The door next to me slams, but the room is fuller. My eyes flash open. There is something beside my room. I kill the lights and start to run. Routine. I race downstairs further, down to the basement areas. I start to turn on the light. KNO-KNOCKAKNO-KNOCK It’s trying to break free. It is inside, and it wants out. I can’t let it go now. W-wwaant to s-see yooou…. I blink. Trashcans appear. I hide instinctively. D-Doon’t you hiiiiiiiide from m-me-ee-e It’s a record skipping. It’s a voice, familiar, yet distant. Once so full of cheer, there is blackness and darkness now. I am scared. Terrified. Please, father, help me. Please, mother, help me. I come out of hiding, shaking worse than ever. I start to cross up the ladder, peeking into the room above. It knows where you are. I retreat to the lower level once more, resigned to my fate. The shambling, one legged pony is making her way to the ladder. I know my death awaits. I try to prevent it. I hide. I hide and cower, my light hidden. Light will not save me now. Only silence. Only hiding. I feel the eyes on me. Just w-when you thought about it… it came in. D-D---- hide f-from meee…. I come out of hiding and run to the light, believing myself safe as the feeling fades. I twist. Turn. Creeeak… DO not…. I blink. My clock appears. Stay here. I wind as fast as I can. The clock disappears. I blink. Behind me, a machine appears. It looks familiar. Wires. Buttons. Charts. I remember something. Pink. Lots of pink. H-Hee-eey Yo-o-o---oou~ I start to walk to the ladder, trying to ignore the voices. I’ve gotten a headache. Dawn approaches. The sun rises. It cannot find me in the basement. I awaken. I don't feel like I slept. I stand. Something is... wrong. Very wrong. I look around and realize it. Where did my diary go?! > ... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Where did the diary go?” I look around my bed frantically, my eyes wide. That was so important. I couldn’t have lost it. “I clearly remember putting it under my pillow,” I say. I check. Not there. I run to my desk and sift through the papers. “I don’t get it.” Nothing there. “Where could I have hidden it?” I look around, the pictures on the walls looking like eyes in my peripheral vision. I feel them, searching with me, trying to find my diary. Trying to know. Learn. Why were they all so curious? “My memory d-didn’t used to deceive me like this,” I mutter. “All of this is rather strange.” Something shatters in the distance. A broken light, or window, no doubt. Those visitors… My eyes narrow. “No matter what happened, I have to find it immediately… or else…” Shattering. Creaking. I sift through my notes again, trying to organize them. So many drawings. So many, many dreams. “Or else I won’t be able to work tomorrow. It has notes on all the observations I made over the last few years.” How long had I been taking those notes? Ever since my schooling? Since the sun set? I grab my candle. It’s time to search now, not wonder, not think. Only searching. I walk quickly into the next room. “Someone gave me this diary when I was first learning how to write.” I gulp, looking around in the darkness. I can’t see anymore. “He said that I would write my entire life down in it. And that with the last page of the notebook, my life would end as well.” I take a deep breath. “He always speaks in metaphors… I was so young. I took his words literally. I wanted to live a long life, so I rationed the pages. I wrote only in my smallest handwriting, rarely and briefly. It became a habit.” The shadows seem to close in on me, listening closely for me to finish speaking before they kill me. “But a-after awhile,” I mutter, watching them with my grey eyes, the bags under them growing heavier, “I forgot his words. For some reason, they’ve come back to me now, and they unsettle me.” As I finish, I quickly begin to turn the light. The shadows watch me hungrily. I take a deep breath. Why had I been talking to? Who was the shadows? Whose eyes watched me so intently? The light flashes on. I run to the upstairs room and twist on the light. Downstairs, the door creaks. I don’t know if it’s open yet or not. The light flashes on. I see it - a torn note. Is the handwriting small? Is it mine? I don’t remember. Who wrote this note for me? What seems horrible in this house, will stop scaring you if you go out into the woods. Touch them without fear. Open your eyes. Don’t be afraid to look. Don’t be afraid to see. This is not death, but simply a new time. There is no death. “How can these pages be here? Why are they torn?” I shiver. Despite the light being on, I feel watched. Scared. Who is watching? Is it you? “I don’t like this at all,” I whisper. “Did someone get into the room while I was asleep, and steal the diary?” I hear a soft thud in another room, hardly audible. My ears twitch. “I have to check the house again. I really neglected it…” I feel something strange in my heart. Warmth. It’s simply the light, warming my back. I run to the next room and turn on the light. KNO-KNOCKAKNO-KNOCK Next room. Next light. “My father worked here before I did. Before him - my grandfather, and so on. Each one of my predecessors added something to this house. But the past is not a very valuable legacy. Which is why many rooms are locked. I never look in there.” Time is repeating itself. I’ve said this all before. I run quickly back to the adjacent room. Thunder rolls. “Something is getting closer from the other side,” I shout, my voice echoing around the room. The noise is nice. Where is the other side? I don’t know. “I have to hurry!” The door is open. I run to the room and straight out the door. I am deep in the woods. I see her instantly. The ghost. My eyes widen - no one else is allowed here. I run to her, already having a sharp retort in my mouth to yell at her, tell her to go away. There is nothing there. Distantly, a familiar song is played. My head - it hurts so horribly bad. The song sounds so familiar. A music box. It’s beautiful. I feel tears rise to my eyes. The ghost is gone. My head stops hurting. “From time to time… I see things that simply cannot be. Sometimes I even see new stars in the sky.” I remember those clearly now, for some reason. 4 beautiful stars, and the sound of laughter. I shake my head. Such thoughts mean nothing. “But I don’t record that in my archives or reports. It’s simply depression. Or maybe it is something worse.” I always did worry too much. I walk. I walk and walk and walk. For some reason, I am not scared. The woods, with their scary faces, are not scary. I stroll leisurely. The break is… nice. I reach my house. Back into the fray. I walk inside. I awaken. > ..-. .-. .. . -. -.. ... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I walk to the next room. Twist. Turn. Light. I blink. There is a bed. My head hurts. “I remember now! Someone very small lived here!” Someone, or something? I don’t recall. I turn off the light. The pony with the box head stands nearby. I simply walk away. I’ve no time for monsters today. No patience. Nopony home. Upstairs. Twist, turn, light. Blink. The eyes on the floor watch close as the telescope appears. I see another torn note. They are real. But not as they appear. You see them like that because you’re in a state of somnolence. My vocabulary lessons paid off. Did I ever have those? “Somnolence. The state of drowsiness or severe insomnia that can cause peculiar images.” I take a deep breath. “I often addressed the diary entries to myself. My older self, who, one day, would read these entries. It was just a game - but now, I feel that a complete stranger has penned these pages!” But how am I my own stranger? What has happened to my self? I turn off the light and turn. The boxhead pony once more. I gasp and stumble back, going back towards the ladder. But I stop myself. What had those notes said? … Face my fear. I turn and walk hesitantly towards the beast. I am unafraid. I walk through it, holding my breath. Nothing is there. “... The air is thick.” I open the door and walk to the lights. Twist. Turn. Repetition. Somewhere, a door creaks open. Light. I blink. My clock appears. I wind, quickly. I want this hell to stop. I turn off the lights. Next room, turn, twist, lightning strike. Lights on. There’s scribbling all over my walls and floors. White hoofprints. I’m scared. Face my fears. I need to face them all. The door slams. I shut the light off. Knock. Knock. Knock. Next room. Creeeak…. Twist. Turn. Light. Blink. Clock. Wind. So repetitive. This is my hell. My punishment. I failed. --_C-Come clos-ssser… Lights off. She won’t find me. I’m right here…. I run downstairs, unable to face this monster. In the corner of my eye, I see a shade enter the room I leave. I am safe, for now. But I am not. Dead end. My end. Doon’t h-hhhide f-from mee…. Twist, turn, creak. I breathe in the light. I savor it. I turn it off. Nothing is there. I peek up the ladder. The shade smiles down at me, her faded grin haunting me from above. I blink. I go up. Gone. I walk. You thought about it, and, now, it is inside. Upstairs further. I hold my candle steady. Nothing here either. I go to the light. Twist. Don’t do this! I close my eyes. Turn. I whisper, softly, my apologies. The lights turn on. Dead end. I turn off the lights. Downstairs. To the door. It takes a moment - the light flickers. I open the door and walk to the next room and the next. An eye watches me in the room of eyes. It knows. Someone is home. I don’t know what to do. I hear a voice. I know the voice. Whose voice?! H-Heeeey y-yy-oo-cube! “... A-And what’s this,” I say, pretending I don’t hear. Pretending the pony is not behind me. “Is it a hole in the wall, or am I just seeing things? Of course, I am only dreaming again, and it is easy to prove. Once the light is on, this will all disappear.” All of it. Even me. Especially them. I want them all to go away. I twist. Turn. The shade approaches. Her grey colors shock me, but I keep turning. No shock. No color. Only twist. Only turn. Turn. Turn. Turn. Fasterfasterfaster - Nothing happens! The shade nears. I am in an unknown hell with only shadow and grey to guide me. I close my eyes tight. I don't want to watch. “.. Where am I now?” The eye is gone. The shade is gone. My telescope, gone. “Long periods of isolation are harmful to the psyche. A tired mind distorts the perception of reality. I have to snap out of it. I feel like something eerie is happening to my home.” Home, or mind? Are they the same? Both are gone. I walk, and walk, and walk. The floor clicks beneath my hooves. It is made of tiles. I see something up ahead. Light? Colored light. I feel my heart racing. I run toward the light. It gets further and further away. Something calls me closer. I see a flash of purple in the distance - was it grey? My eyes are blind. I see only shadow. I cry out for help. Nopony came. Not even the one I sought the most. The shadows close in. I awaken. *~*~*~ I leap out of bed and kill the lights. A strange dream indeed. No time to dwell on it now. Open door. Turn on light. “I can feel someone was here recently. There’s a lip-shaped star on the door lock. As if someone kissed my door with a clay-covered mouth…” Downstairs. Next room. Twist. Light. The wardrobe appears. Lights off; next room. A shadow of a memory crosses over my hooves. “Rotting leaves on the ground… Is it fall now?” Two racers. One winner. Neither won. Betrayal? My head is full of thoughts. No wonder it hurts. Twist. Light. Blink. Clock. Wind. Somewhere, a light blows out. Next room. Twist. Turn. I shed light on all of the cracks. There’s so many here. “Everything is as it was, but still - it’s slightly off somehow. What’s changed?” You have. “Or have I just been too overwhelmed lately?” That must be it. “I can’t keep anything straight! My memory is going.” Gone. What happened to my memories? Blink. Full room. I kill the light and head downstairs. Twist, turn, procedure. Order. Just what I wanted, right? Empty room. Upstairs. Lights. Nothing. Lights off. I’ve gotten better at this. More efficient. She’ll be proud, I hope. I want her to be proud, the one I called out to. Then, and only then, will the dawn come. I cross to the next room with tears in my eyes. I turn on the light. Lightning strikes. I kill the lights and go into the room previous, fear clutching my heart. The door slams shut behind me. I open it quickly. Nothing there. I cross into the next room. My magic wavers. My candle flickers. I think to myself - they’re here. I thought about it. It’s inside. The shuffling one legged pony walks in, her straightjacket tugging against the floorboards. She’s right in front of me. I run as fast as I can. I hide. Her eyes search for me. I pray to whoever will listen - save me. Help me. I cry out, silently, and nopony comes. They’re all gone now. Nopony home. That’s what I wanted. Are you s-still here? She leaves. I step out. I glance at the light, wondering, should I turn it on? No n--need. Next room. Nothing. Next room. The eye watches. He’s always watching. Keeping me here. Trapped. Alone. Frightened. I will never be free. “I know, that when the light returns - this horror will simply vanish.” I twist the light. He watched. He is angry. The world shakes as the lights come on. I wince in pain. Ow. I blink. “What happened here? Something is telling me I shouldn’t even try to uncover it.” I turn off the light and hide, unsure if he’s still watching. It appears he is gone, however. I turn on the light. The boxhead I never noticed disappears. I take a deep breath. Why doesn’t she scare me like she used to? I try to take a step, but suddenly, I am halfway across the house. I stumble, surprised - this is new. Is it? I don’t remember. Everything is new to me now. Everything but my routine. Twist. Turn. Light. Blink. The fan appears. I go upstairs. Turn on the light. Nothing new. I open the door next to me and walk through. Lightning strikes again. The beast is nearby once more. Twist. Turn. Light. Blin- SLAM. My eyes shoot open. My clock is there. I wind, frantically. Nowhere to hide. Nowhere I can really run. I am trapped. Haunted. The visitors hate me, don’t they? I failed, I fai- Fffrree...zzzee… Light off. I run to the door. I open it quickly. It came in. I run as fast as I can away from the monster. It follows. It chases. I turn on the light upstairs. The eye watches. It knows. The shade catches me. I scream out. Nopony hears. Lights on. Nothing is here. I cry softly, feeling ready to collapse. It’s been such a long night. Such a long chapter of my story, and I can’t even write any of it out. My diary is gone. I’ve no journal anymore. It’s all gone now. He made it so. Who is he? I do not know. My memories... Lightning strikes. The hell continues. Through the house, I continue. Monsters, everywhere. Monsters, all of them. You are missing the point. Why do they keep whispering to me? Fear not. I am scared and they cannot help me. The lights like to flicker. I go to the next door. The one leg walks through. I simply sigh and turn around, unable to face her. My clock was there. Will I never be free of this hell? I make my way back to my clock eventually. I wind. My candle shakes. It is still not daw- H--HhhH----ey! I gasp, my eyes wide. She is behind me. That voice. I know her voice. The shade? The grey? I try to call out - her name. What was her name!? I don’t want to lose her name again, not after she left us all be- The sun rises. I awaken. > ... > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I creep out of bed, holding my head. It hurts terribly. I hear nothing in the stillness; only silence as the wind brushes past my house. I stand, glancing outside. Dark. Time to begin again. I grab my candle and begin to walk. “I… really love having guests over,” I admit to myself. “There was a time when little forest things would come to visit. And sometimes we - I even made dinner for lost wanderers.” I ignore the fact that I can’t cook well at all. “I would set the table and pass the time in a conversation with them in my head. That’s when I realized that more than anything in the world, I’m afraid of the Invisible.” I took a deep breath. My head hurt so much. I saw so much, so suddenly. Light. Much light. And smiles, and laughter, and happy tears. Barley fields of gold and trees with red shining apples. And it all turned to dust. Voices filled my head, and the screams inside were my own. “... Where is my diary now?” That’s right. The diary. I need it. The voices fade as I cling to that thought. “I’ve got to find it quickly! Nothing else matters.” I trot down to the basement, then turn and begin to twist the light. Clicking fills my ears. They twitch as the lights come on. A memory resurfaces. A note appears before my eyes as I blink. In any home, you only need to wait for sunrise. No exceptions. One simply cannot go on if there is night inside. “The hoofwriting is made to look like mine, but it’s just a little bit off. I didn’t write this, that’s for sure.” Is it though? My memory is so bad… How would I remember my own hoofwriting? I sigh and make my way upstairs. I walk to the light and twist it, my purple - no, my black magic sparking. It is black and grey, like my eyes. Twist. Turn. Click. I walk into the next room as the light flashes on, and only one thought enters my head. “The forest is at the end of its life,” I say softly, stopping. “It used to be a rich biotope, but now, it’s dying. I couldn’t find any healthy new growth. The land has grown soggy too. All the large species of animals have died out. All that is left are the numerous species of insects.” The words fade as quickly as they come, but the thoughts do not. Which forest? The one around me? But the trees were always full of life here. This was the only forest I knew. There were no forests in Canter… What was I thinking? I hear a creak upstairs. My ear twitches. Click, whirr. I walk up the stairs and begin to turn the light. It flashes on and I continue to the next room wordlessly. I turn on that light too. Distantly, a bulb blows. I wonder, very briefly, if somepony is home? Nopony has been home for a long time. Nopony is here, I tell myself as I go down the stairs. I would have seen them, obviously. It wasn’t that big of a house. I go to the light and twist. The light flashes on. If you don’t see something, it doesn’t mean it isn’t there. My heart freezes. It was like… Like the notes knew, somehow. But… But that had to be impossible. “I-I don’t get it. Why did I write this in my sleep? What does it even mean??” My head hurts so very much. I don’t know how much more of this I can take. “I just want to go home,” I whisper. I look around and walk upstairs. All the lights are on. I didn’t do that. Who else is… I go further up, turning on one of the few turned-off lights. As I do, I hear the knocking once more. I have grown used to the knocking. I only want to know who is there. The ghost? The forest? The eye? I’m so tired of this already. The light flickers on. Somewhere, a bulb bursts once more. Next room. Next light. Twist, turn, click, whirr. Next room. The light is on. The clock is here. I wind, slowly. Nothing seems to change. The clock disappears and I walk to the next room. Creeeeeak… Just like always. I casually make my way downstairs. I walk out the door into the night. My house is nearby. I feel no fear at the moment, though I know it creeps up behind me like death. Slowly, slowly, I walk through the forest. The fog clings to the trees. Crickets chirp. Timberwolves growl in the distance, but I pay that sound no heed. I see her, in the distance. I pause. … Blue? I run towards her, but she disappears in an instant. As though she were never there in the first place. Was she just a hallucination caused by somnolence? My disease? My curse? I continue walking. I must find her. I don’t care how long it takes. Maybe she knows what’s happening to me. Why my memories are dying. Why I am so very tired. There! A flash of blue. I run to her. So many monsters. So much darkness. But in the end, always, always the stars. Stars as far as I can see, music ringing in my ears. The world is the color of C flat minor, all the stars and galaxies the swirling notes that echo in my skull. I feel sick - alive? Wonderful, dreadful, I am the forest and they are the deathly, dying, dead, dead trees. I breathe and it all disappears. “... A strange… and unthinkable world appeared to me through the trees.” So many stars. I saw 2 new stars. Had it not been 4 last time? Only two left, I suppose. My heart felt fragile - open, vulnerable, and yet so full of joy and hope. I felt… tired, in a good way. A long way. A short way? I couldn’t decide. “My… duty is to record the changes in the world.” To who is this duty? Myself? Or the ever watching eye? “But how can I even be sure that any of this is REAL,” I shout to the forest. The crickets answer back. With a soft sigh, I return to my home. The woods creak around me. The ground crinkles under my hooves. I make it back to my house, walk in and shut the door. I close my eyes and pray for a good dream. I awaken. > -.-. .-. -.-- / ..-. --- .-. / -.. .- .-- -. > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I stare at the ceiling for a few minutes, just… breathing. I know I can’t stay like that for long. It’s just that I don’t want to leave just yet. I don’t want to do this anymore. Why can’t I just sink back into sleep and run into the woods, away from the monsters and things and just… breathe? Alone? Nopony home. I stand, grabbing my candle, and preparing myself. “It’s no secret that everyone has to learn proper hide and seek technique. This is common knowledge handed down throughout the ages.” Hide and seek - the art of survival. It was turned into a game for the children to understand, but in the end, it’s all just survival instinct. “But, even as a child, I had an exceptional talent for this difficult art. To remain undiscovered, remember one simple rule.” “Don’t look,” I say, shutting my eyes tightly. “And then, no one will see you. What I can’t see, isn’t there… Strange, but it works.” I open the door and continue onward, slowly. I start on the light. It flashes on, and I contemplate turning it off once more. But it won’t be long before I return to this room, correct? Surely I can simply go one room down before retreating into the cold grip of darkness. I trot downstairs. Twist, turn, click. My horn sparks along with the light. I blink - a vent appears. Nothing useful. I leave this light on too - what can be the harm of alleviating my fears? Next room. Next light. So… boring. So routine. My wardrobe appears. It’s empty, filled with cobwebs. Only spiders live here now. Next room. Light streams in from the room I just came from. It fills me with warmth. Twist, turn, click, flash. I keep the light on. Next room. I hesitate only slightly - there, in the darkness, is that one of them? Steeling my heart, I continue forward. Twist. Turn. Places to hide appear. Nothing important. I refuse to look - if I can’t see it, those dusty machines that remind me of pink won’t be there. I descend. Twist. Flash. It’s… empty. Just empty. I turn off the light. Back upstairs? This is all so uneventful. It’s… different. Somehow, some way, I get the feeling that my house is in agony. It’s a whimpering animal, shielding itself from me. Everything is wrong. “Where is that diary?... Could it be hiding here somewhere?” I shout, “hey! Where are you?” The silence answers back. Darkness floods the room as I shut off the light. I continue into the next room, but stop short - a machine behind me shifts, forming a small table. I… remember this. “I know this place… A neat little hiding place - a secret childhood stash. Right… Right over here is where someone used to hide his little secrets.” His? Who was he? I tried for a name. I shut my eyes tightly. Blue, white… I turn on the light with my magic as I remember a name. “S...Shining?” I hear something upstairs. Hoofsteps? I kill the lights again and go to the next room. There’s tread marks on the ground. “Hoofprints. Dirt. Still a bit fresh - this is recent. What is that?” Are they… mine? “Did I really walk through the forest in my sleep?...” Were those dreams real? Were they fake? Was this all just a hallucination? “At least this is new news.” Next room. Drawings all over the walls. Moons. Stars. Balloons? I’m so confused. Happy ponies cover the walls in childish doodles. “A child. Could there have been a child here?” No, somehow that felt like the wrong guess. “A mare?... Is it me?... No, I can’t recall. I can’t remember anymore. I’m always forgetting things.” I want to forget them all. I kill the lights. Next room. I walk a bit faster. There’s a pounding sound swelling in my ears. Kill the lights - it’s louder - upstairs. Kill the light quickly. The sound suddenly cuts off. Next room. One I haven’t been in yet. I turn the light. Twist. Flash. Blink… My eyes stay shut longer and longer lately. A bed appears. It looks like… who was it… White, purple, diamonds… Her ‘fainting’ couch. I don’t… remember? My head hurts - I have a migraine. Too much is happening. I kill the light. I don’t want to see anymore - if I don’t see it, it’s not there. Upstairs. Twist, turn. Fla- BOOM I scream, surprised, as lightning strikes on the soundless night. I take a deep breath. W-What was- KNOCKAKNOCKNOCKAKNOCK I cover my ears, shutting my eyes tightly. Tears are rising to them. It’s so suddenly very loud, so very very loud. I look around quickly for an escape. The only way is down. I can only descend now, into the darkness. All the lights have shattered from the lightning. I look up as the light turns off all on it’s own. No, you can’t- I turn it on quickly, tears bubbling themselves down my face. “No no no no-” You’ve trapped yourself. “NO, I HAVEN’T!” The light won’t come on. It keeps turning off. Shaking, I look at the ladder. I don’t… I don’t want to see them anymore. Please. Don’t make me. I walk down. C-Ca-- y’hear us, hon--? I turn on the light. A shadow drifts through the door, a shade. I gasp, stumbling backwards. She sees me. I see her. I run. She follows. I run up the stairs. W-Wow… I turn on the light, but this room is empty. Nothing. Nopony home. I turn off the light, shaking. I hear something breathe behind me and run. I can’t stop crying. N-No, please don’t run… A new voice this time. Why do they sound so sweet? They’re monsters! They bring me so much pain, I-I can’t handle them! I keep running. I run to the door and start turning it. Hi! I open the door and hide. I shut my eyes tightly. Something enters the room. It searches. I can feel the eyes looking, searching for me. Why h--- u trapped your--lf? I don’t respond - can’t respond, am so frozen in fear. The feeling… fades. I step out of hiding. There’s a small pony, covered in leaves. She turns toward me. Are you okay, Tw---ght? My eyes widen. My… name?... I walk towards her - I haven’t heard that in so long - and I just want her to say it again in that soft, timid voice. As I reach her, she disappears. A shiver runs up my spine. “... Feels like I stepped on something living.” I turn, seeing a shadow approaching. I hide quickly. The shade searches and whispers, constantly trying to find me. I shake in fear, but do not reveal myself. I can’t stand this monster - I run with him in the room, running as fast as I can. She chases me, but I run and run and run. She will not have me today. I get downstairs. She nearly had me. I run around, room to room, light to light. But it’s a dead end, as always. I backtrack. Maybe I can… I get to my ladder, but I hear her upstairs. I take a step back. I shut my eyes, only for… a moment… I open them. My clock is there. I greedily drink up the time, sighing in relief. Yes. The dawn will save me. I know it. I can only rely on her. I can hide from everything else. I run upstairs. Wind, wind, wind. Creak. I see the eye of God watching me, and he growls. I have angered the lonely God. The shade sees me and runs for me. Turn on, turn on, turn o- Flash. I run downstairs to safety, my breath shuddering out of my mouth. I run and run and run, my breath wearing thin. I’m so tired. The light goes out in the last room I go to. I turn, quickly. Blink. TIME! I wind quickly. Yes, thank God, yes… I sit, shivering in the room. My eyes are wide and tired. I cry and cry and cry. I just need to wait it out. She will come. Surely, she will come. Except deep down, I know, I’m supposed to be strong enough to help myself - that’s what she will require of me, but I know I’ll never be able to be strong enough. Not with all these memories plaguing me. I breathe out. The sun rises. I waken with a scream. > .-.. ..- -. .- > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- My heart is racing. My hooves are shaking. I feel chilled to the bone. I am not okay. I wipe tears from my face - when had I cried? In the dream, or real life? Which was which, I could not tell. How long now had I been afflicted by this great curse? “W-Why,” I said softly to the nothingness. Nothing answered back with a hollow, soft whistle as the wind drifted through my cold, drafty home. The… the cracks. The cracks in my house - my mind. I needed to fix them all. Myself. I couldn’t rely on the dawn anymore. She would never save me now. No dawn came for the T...Twilight. That’s my name. “Twilight.” I mouth it again. I hear a rumble in the distance. I shouldn’t know this name. But I do. It is who I am. I hear a rumble in the distance. Thunder?... Or something more? I stand. I need to find more things. I need to learn. I get my candle and move to the next room. Twist - flash. Time for light. Downstairs, light turning, flash. We planted the forest to hide one tree. Who was we? The visitors? The guests, my… f… I shook my head. Who were they hiding? The God? Me? Themselves? “... There are fewer and fewer blank pages left…” The thought shakes me to the core. I walk upstairs. Knockaknockaknock “This looks like a dismal place,” I say to my dusty, empty photo frames, “but I feel at peace here. Ordinary forest topsoil… Clay, sand, leaves, and compost. A normal forest. The way it should be.” Not… not like the other world. Next room. I hear a bulb burst upstairs, but I ignore it. No time here. No pony here. No worries tonight. I’m too tired to worry. Twist, turn, click. Next room. Creak. This room appears to be in disrepair when the lights come on - I will need to fix it soon. I cannot have visitors if my house is so unclean. Do I want visitors? I don’t know one way or the other anymore. Downstairs. I turn on the lights. Knock knock knock knock knock! I don’t respond. My hoofsteps creak against the rotting floorboards as I make my way upstairs 2 floors. I come to a dark room. Twist, turn. This is getting… easier. The light comes on. There’s scratches on the wall. Why? I don’t know. Next roo- KNOCKNOCKNOCK! “Shut up,” I say under my breath as the light turns on. Next room. The sound of my own voice gave me comfort. I keep going. “I take samples of the air every day,” I say to noone in particular. “The humidity is the same composition too. Nitrogen and oxygen. The land hasn’t changed much in eons. Everything’s the same as it was for my ancestors. It’s just that the land’s richness is in decline. Taking note of it, day after day, is my job.” This world never changes. Not until I let it. I turn on the light. Lightning strikes in the distance - for once, I don’t jump. Next room. The thunder after the strike still lingers, but this world still feels at peace. “Everything’s quiet. No wolves or owls… Only frogs and gnats.” I go to my clock and wind. Time passes. I see a note, beside me. I pick it up and my heart goes cold. Fewer and fewer days left. That almost mirrors exactly what I said earlier. Were… Were these being written as I walked around? Somepony was home. KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK. The house shakes. I hear a roar. The door creaks open. It’s… He’s trying to find me. My eyes narrow. “I still have some pages left.” I run downstairs and out the door. I wander the forest with a new will in my heart, fire pumping through my veins instead of blood. I search and search and call out for the mare. I need to see her - I need to know! I hear singing in the distance. An old lullaby about the Mare in the Moon. I look up - there is no moon on this night. It is a black moon. Nothing to be seen. I keep walking, following the song. I walk for such a very long time. It gives me peace, even if it’s exhausting. I walk and walk and walk, because I am now determined to find her. I will not just slip peacefully into the blissful ignorance once more. Somepony was home now. A roar in the distance. I jump and look back. When I turn around once more, I hear her song again. I see her. I study her briefly. Blue mane… Blue body. She looks like a ghost, a wisp, something not meant to exist in this plane of reality. Her body is ethereal, see through, blank. Her eyes shine a bright white, but the light is not so harsh on the eyes that I must look away. On her flank is a beautiful moon. The Mare in the Moon. I walk to her calmly. She turns her head to look at me and smiles. She opens her mouth and says something, but all I hear is static. I shut my eyes. Towers, mighty and majestic. Crystal towers. A star, with no lights surrounding it, just a single, solitary star. And, behind it, in the sky, is one glowing red eye. The sun rises and the star fades. The moon rises and the eye is gone. The moon sets, and the darkness of Twilight settles in. And the eye, unseen, still watches as the towers grow. I open my eyes. She is gone. … I miss my home. I awaken. > .... --- -- . > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I stand up, taking a deep breath. Back to hell. I glance around. Been awhile since I saw this room. It was back when that pony with a box on its head stood behind me to scare me. How… long ago had that been? I had lost all track of time. Odd. The room looks so familiar. A bedroom. It looks clinical. There are drawings all over the walls, as though a child was here. I shake my head and go into the next room. Twist. Flash. Blink. A bed appears. Just like… last time? How long ago was it? I shut off the light behind me and head into the next room, a sense of unease rising in my chest. It seems darker in this room. I quickly turn the light on. ...has to admit the obvious, but he doesn’t know how. It’s beyond him. Who? Was it the lonely God? Was it S… that peculiar name that began with S that stuck out in my mind? My father? My ancestors? “Who,” I ask to the darkness. Only darkness responds. I huff, frowning. Typical. I blink and my clock appears. I cling to the time, eager to continue. I want this to end, quickly. I just want it all to stop. I want to go back home. Lightning strikes nearby. The winding makes the Old God angry. Well, screw him. I turn off the light and head to the next room. Twist. Creak. Flash. I blink and nothing substantial appears. Some old scattered pages of some old forgotten book and that fainting couch I now recall. My memories are returning. Down a level. Twist, as always. Creak, creak. Flash, blink. My eyes shoot open as I make a connection. “This is all crawling out from the inside. Not crawling in from the outside at all.” That makes perfect sense. I’d been patching up holes and yet they kept getting inside. To stop this, once and for all, to stop the monsters (was that what they were?) from coming inside, I had to stop it, myself. “The horror from the woods is in my house.” I am the horror. It starts and ends with me. My heart steels with determination. I blink and feel it - a breach. The Old God has heard my revelation and wants a word with me. I hear knocking, distantly. There is a ringing in my ears. I kill the lights and go upstairs. Blink. N-----nnnnow I knoow w-w---yyy… The lights are off when I open them. That had sounded like… Lightning flashes, lighting my way. I ignore the lights. Upstairs. I turn this single one on to see if this is the room with the Old God. I open my eyes. A clock, and on the wall, constellations. I don’t recall putting those there. You picked the wr00--ng house. I keep winding. Why do they speak to me? What are they trying to do? Help? Hinder? When I touch them, I die - sometimes. If they find me, I start again, I slip deeper into my insanity-- Insanity, a memory! This will be where it gets me, here, in my domain, on my own head be it, where be it as it may, I will control my own destiny. I wind. Dawn approaches. I will be free. Down. Play! “Not now, Pinkie,” I hear someone say. Who was Pinkie? I lick my lips. To the right and up. I ignore the bed and the eyes that gaze up at me from the floor. The light flashes on and a telescope appears. More constellations and this time faces in the moon. They turn their gaze my direction. Why? I gasp - it is beside me. I stumble back, feeling the caress of the forest on my hoof. I shiver. “Forest debris,” I mutter. “Leaves. Earth. Bone.” The light flickers off. I move to the next room. Twist. Creak. He watches. Finally. I fix the light and he leaves. “NO!” I growl, stamping my hoof down, my candle shaking in my magic. I wanted to know! I needed to know! No matter. No matter at all, I would - the time would come, when it would be just right. I wind the clock that appears. Many of these tonight… It does not give me much time. Another breach appears. Would that God not leave me alone? This is another chance, however. I blink and the door to that area slams shut. The light bursts. Wha… I stumble back in fright as I see… myself walk through the closed door, mumbling. … Is that truly what I look like? My fur is grey, my eyes dead. My mane is wild. I look so tired, and in my magic is a laughing, lightless candle. I run from it, uncertain - touching the other monsters caused me death. Would I cause death as well? I shiver as my Alter passes through me on it’s way to the light. I grow less horrified and more… curious. I follow it. It twists a light on. “I-iii -- inally b-back!” It says this in a poor approximation of my voice. I continue to follow it, my curiosity keeping the best of me. “Ff-finally I’m home,” it says monotonously. No, this is not my home. I am not that… happy sounding about my predicament. I am not so content. This is a trick. I go straight to the door and attempt to open it, ignoring the Alter as it vanishes. KNOCKAKNOCKKNOCKKNOCK!!! I scream, gasping as the house shakes. The God sends a clear message. There is a task I must do before I can enter through there. I glance at the new Alter that has formed. … I know what the God wants. I gulp and stand, walking to where the Alter stands. It watches me a moment before stepping into the same position I am in. “And now… I’m home.” I shiver as it disappears. I look down at my grey fur and sigh. My candle shakes and quivers in my magic. I have played his game now. Time for my part of the bargain. I walk back and open the door, my head pounding. There is no knocking. It is just me. Only me home. I blink after I twist the lights, acting without thinking. A clock appears. I don’t wind it. I keep walking. Next room. Twist. Blink. Clock. I don’t wind. I will wait for it. … Morning comes. The sun rises. There is no sight of the God. But I know he is there. He is always watching. I awaken. > ..-. .- -- .. .-.. .. .- .-. > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I stand, tired. I am… oh so dreadfully tired. I have not had proper rest in years. Eons, it seems. My head aches. My body longs for sleep. I grab my candle and start my long night. I walk to the next room, sighing. “It was just another dream. And now I’m back.” What a farce to tell oneself. It is never ‘just a dream’. This is my psyche, and something is broken with it. Should I run? Flee into the forest and lose my mind? Or embrace death as it comes for me? Twist, turn, click. I ignore the light and go downstairs. Twist, turn, click. Come out! It’s time! “These aren’t my words! These aren’t my thoughts! And this has nothing to do with sleepwalking. Whatever it is, it is flesh and blood. Someone else is inside my home.” I growl, crumpling up the page. They use up my life, my pages, for this foolish scheme to get me outside. There are monsters in the woods. I must stay in my home. My safe place. Where I cannot be harmed again. Where I can harm no one else. This place is safe. I go upstairs. “There are lots of books. All containing the same endlessly repetitive notes. I doubt they’re useful. Everything that makes this my home is also in my head. I’ve been living here for so long that we’re the same thing now.” That is right. This house - the Old God said this house was my mind. That is why I protect it from the monsters. They seek to tear my house down. To let the forest claim it. I cannot let that happen. Right? Next room. Knock-knock-knock-knock. Nopony home. Not right now, at least. Twist, flash. Next room. Twist, flash. There! What you’re seeing isn’t really nothing! Down the stairs. Turn on the lights. I heard knocking distantly. He did not want me to do this. But someone did. The one with the notes did. I trusted the one with the notes more. I made my way up two floors and began to turn on the lights. Better open it yourself. Knock-knock-knockknock! Not yet, I still insist. To the left. I turn on the lights. The darkness during this process no longer stirs fear in me. Just anticipation. Nothing. Next room. Twist, click, flash! It is very important that sunrise finds you in a fully restored home. Your house is always much larger than it seems. That much was certainly true. My castle was much larger than it seemed. Castle?... That’s right. I lived in a castle. Not a library. Not a tower. A full blown crystal castle. This was… this was not my home. I sat in silence a moment before shaking my head. An important revelation, but more pressing matters were on me at the moment. I was close to breaking out of whatever prison this was. I would be back home soon, and everything would be okay again. No monsters would hunt me. No notes would mark the end of my days. I would be myself again. Next room. I trusted these notes. I would restore my home before leaving. Twist, turn, flash. Next room. Flash. My clock. Wind. Knock. Knock-Knock. Knock. I heard the door open, even from all the way upstairs. I made my way down to it, nodding. It was time to see her once again. I am in the woods. Walking. It is so hard to see her out here in this forest. This odd place. The crickets are in my ears and the creaking of my house is in the distance. I just wander aimlessly, ears straining to hear some sort of sign of her. In the trees, I hear an owl. That is… familiar. “Owlicious?” That is familiar as well. I follow his hooting. I find her soon enough. Ethereal mane, eyes a shining white. She scares me. But she smiles calmly at me. She speaks again, and I hear words through the static now. It -- --m0st time, Tw---ht. --- -ou re-dy? Ready? Ready for what? I edge closer to hear better and brush my hoof against her side. I see the most beautiful sky, filled with shining stars that got closer, ever closer to the moon. Just before they touch, the sky is obscured by a map. A map of numbers and symbols and words I can’t read. Brambles tug at the edges of the map. The sky turns the deepest black before flashing, a bright purple. Then it all goes white. And I awaken. … And I stay awake. I stand quickly. “I am sick. I’m so sick…” That much is evidenced by my insanity. “Why do I keep seeing all those things when I look outside? Nothing like that could be out there. It’s against the laws of nature. It can only be the forest out there. The dark, grim, dying forest. I know.” How did I know? This was not my home. This was not my forest. This was my prison. Anything could happen in these halls. I took a deep breath. Now, it all really began. The mare out in the forest had asked if I was ready. The note had said it’s time. It’s now or never. I lick my lips and nod. I’m going home. I dart quickly to the room on the left, twisting the light on. I will wait no longer in bed. I turn on the light and ignore the thought that this is all just the case of sleepwalking. It is clearly more than that. Someone is in this house with me, and they have taken my notebook. They are determined to end this quickly. So am I. We are on the same team. “We’ll work together.” I grin and keep going left, unlocking the door as fast as I can. Next light, twist! I’m moving faster than ever. Training. Who knows how many houses I must repair yet before I can leave. I twist, twist- GRR… I do not freeze as I hear the growl. I just keep going. I know he knows there’s been a change. A big one. The Old God is displeased. I work to unlock the next room. KNOCKAKNOCKAKNOCKKNOCKNOCK The world shakes but I keep unlocking. I blink as the door opens. I’m in a long corridor. This is not the main house. The Old God is trying to teach me a lesson. He is still in control. I start to walk, whispering as I know he can hear me - but so can the invisible child and the mare in the moon. “I always knew that the way out was an illusion. There’s nothing good waiting for me outside. Only the horror of chaos and darkness.” That is a phrase that will please them both. The Old God will be flattered to think I do not want to go outside. The mare will be more pleased that I remember his tricks, who he truly is. He will not beat me. I walk in the dim corridor almost blindly. I find an open door and step through with uncertainty. I stand up out of bed, more eager than ever to be on my way, out of this miserable place. This neverending loop. I wish to be home. I would be there soon. I walk to the door and unlock it. It creaks open and I start changing the light as soon as I can. As the light flashes on, a fallen chair appears. I did not blink. It’s going faster now. Next door. The knob creaks as I unlock it. It swings open and I hear giggling. Laughter. Joy. Timid happiness. Boisterous laughter behind it all. So many emotions. “A child? Could there have been a child here?” I shake my head. “I can’t recall. No, I can’t remember anymore. I’m always forgetting things.” Next room. Get the light. I think as I twist. I was a child here. This place is like my old home. Did I draw these pictures? Why? So I didn’t forget what they looked like, I suppose. The light flashes on and I dart upstairs. I get this light as well. Then I move on, quickly, effortlessly - why is this so much easier now? Am I simply used to it? Next room, light, flash. Next room, creak, twist, flash. Rinse, repeat. I blink and my clock is there. I do not wind it yet. The monsters will come sooner if I do. I want a more fully restored home first. They deserve me at my finest. I will be a good host. Downstairs. Light. On. No more doors. Another clock appears. It’s time, then. That’s as much as I can do on short notice. I wind. RAAR! I ignore his protests. I go up and wind the other clock as well. Then I go up to the attic as it self-winds, fixing a light I forgot. It flashes on and I see hoofprints. The child? The mare? I blink and constellations appear. The mare. She is the one who stole the notebook. She works with the child - a memory, a ghost of my past, myself. She leaves these childish pictures behind as clues. The Old God never noticed until now. Down. Right. Blink - notes appear on the walls. Up a different ladder. Another blown bulb. Twist. She thinks that she’s tearing up the diary in her sleep. She feels that while she sleeps she’s eating up her own life. The mere fact that such a note exists means I’m not. It gives me peace of mind. Twist. Twist. Twis- BOOM Lightning strikes. The God watches. I race to the breach, curing that it is on the other side of the house. A door slams in my face as I approach it. I work to unlock it. I race through it the instant it opens, charging down the ladder. I start to fix the light, feeling his eyes on me. I blink and the lights are on. The eye is gone. Time resumes. Lightning strikes once more, less shocking this time. Other side of the house. No rest for the insane. I charge back through the house. Another door slams and I ignore it. I turn on the light and the eye disappears. He screams, roars in disapproval. I go to a locked door and open it. Rude, how he closes them. I watch. Wait. Boom - lightning, breach. So predictable now. I fix the light and he leaves once more. I do this repeatedly - he is persistent. I blink in one room and receive another note. Guests like those only come in the dark. Because the shadows eat through the walls of your home. My home. My mind. I wander. Somewhere, a bulb blows. I pay it no mind - the guests do enjoy roughhousing a tad bit too much. Let them have their fun. There’s another breach. I grin. It is too late. Dawn approaches. I watch the sunrise with joy, for once. And then I wake once more. > -.. --- .-. -- .- -. - > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- My name is Twilight Sparkle. I am a prisoner in my own mind. I don’t recall how I got here, but I do know that the Old God - his true name eludes me, but I’ll never forget those strange red and yellow eyes - is the warden of this prison. Thus, I must blame him for my containment. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I am a prisoner in my own mind, but I have outside help. The Mare in the Moon - Luna - she is trying to get me out of here. She wants me to go to my home, my real home. She’s using my memories to help me in this hellish dream state. It’s the best she can do. It’s working. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I am a prisoner in my own mind, but I’m planning on escaping. The Mare in the Moon is trying to get me out, and she has aid from the guests. They’re memories, but they are broken memories. The Old God prevents me from remembering fully. They are a danger to my sanity, but I must remember. Remembering is the key. My name is Twilight Sparkle. And I think I’m starting to remember. My name is Twilight Sparkle. And I am getting out of here. I stand, holding my candle with determination. I hear him. He is close, very close to my mind. He has come to investigate more thoroughly the changes I’ve undergone. He knows I remember who I used to be - at least somewhat remember - and he does not want me to. I will fight against him and bring my house - my mind - back into order. I walk to the next room and begin to turn on the light. I hear him roar and pause. He is coming closer steadily. He will be a guest in my home soon. Time to prepare for dawn. I move to the next room, walking with ease in my steps. I will not show him fear. He deserves none. Not when I have my guests by my side. I keep going, into the next dark room, and turn on the light. It takes moments, mere moments of darkness, before the lights flash on and my mind grows clearer. In this room is a noose. Ha! Does he think he can scare me with these images? The mad God is certainly grasping at straws. I simply head back a room and go upstairs, ignoring the noose entirely. I am greeted, when I twist on this light, with more pictures. I smile at them. Balloons and apples and diamonds and rainbows. How silly. But how… nostalgic. It makes me miss home. I wonder, briefly, what those mean, but I shake my head and pass onto the next room. I will know for certain soon enough. Next room. Lights, on. Next room, this one’s upstairs. I twist this light on as well. Knock knock knock knock knock. The door creaks open. But does it really? What does it matter? I chuckle. Let the God come into my mind, then! Let him see how far I’ve come! I feel invincible. My mind is half awake and already, I feel powerful. What will happen when I see her again? Will I overpower even a God? Next room, next light. I hear footsteps. Next room, next light. Whispers fill the air. Next room, next light. Knock knock knock knock knock! The door was not open after all. The God gets impatient since I will not let him inside. I smirk. How silly. Next room. Next light. One more to go. The light in the next room is already on. My clock is here. I speed up time with a smile. This is the mechanic I must abide by in my prison. How my mind has explained away the things happening to it. How ingenious! I follow the process as I have countless times before. I’ve lost track now of how many clocks I have wound. I only know what happens next. My meeting with the Mare in the Moon. I smile to myself. “Every life is given only so much time,” I say, knowing the God and the Mare can both, somehow, hear me. “When you look at the clock you think about how long you have left.” I chuckle, nodding. “It’s best to chase these thoughts away. Once you think of something terrible, it can come true.” I’ve thought many terrible things since I came here. But I have thought many good things too. And they are equally likely. I will get out of here, I think. I will escape. That much is not likely. It is certain. The door opens and I go to it with haste. It is time. I’m ready. I shake my head as I blink, waking up in the forest. I begin to walk. It’s not long before I encounter something I hadn’t expected yet. One of the guests is out in the woods. Hmm. This is new. At first, I stumble back, startled. But, I suppose it makes sense. Luna had control over the guests, but the Old God had control over their appearances. Of course they seem scary. But they are just dreams. I will avoid them, however. Staring at them too long feels… unnatural. I should focus on my goals. Not on horrors. That way, my sanity will remain intact. I continue forward, dodging a few guests. They are startling, but so long as I do not touch them, my mind feels clear. I find the Mare soon. “Luna!” She looks at me, surprised. She smiles. S0 y0u re--mber n0w. Her voice is so much clearer now. Not perfect, but close. That is g--d. “This is it,” I say. “This must be the end. I am ready to leave this behind, Luna. Take me home.” She looks at me with a curious smile. N0t yet. What? Y0u a-- n0t r--dy ye-- “What do you mean?” I start to grow angry. I don’t want to stay here any longer. I want to return home! “I remember who I am! I am Twilight Sparkle!” Y0u h---n’t w0k-- yet----rn’t r--dy. I growl under my breath. “Then help me wake up!” As y---ish. She suddenly charged at me. I shut my eyes, startled. When I opened them again, I saw a castle made of crystal staircases. There were eyes in each window and laughing ponies drawn in chalk on the walls. The laughing ponies were being erased. I see a bright shining moon outside the windows with a mare, watching me. There are stars surrounding her - 4. They are getting closer and closer, always closer. I see them touch the moon. I do not wake when this happens - I watch through the windows of my mind as the mare disappears from the moon, and the dawn comes. And now, I see, there are now 6 stars. 6 stars, the sun, the moon. I blinked and opened my eyes. I was in the forest. Alone. The Mare was gone. I began to walk, feeling… uneasy for some reason. “... Some believe what they see. Others see what they believe.” Which am I, really? “The world is light, and our mind is an elaborately patterned screen. It only lets through what it can perceive.” “But no!” I stop short. “If it were really so, we would all die of fright during childhood.” Monsters under the bed, ghosts in the halls. So many things to perceive. So much to fear. “But I’m a rationalist. I’m a scientist. My world consists of proven and concrete things.” Or at least, it used to. I continue walking, dodging the guests as I do. The woods feel unsafe without the Mare’s presence. I am merely a girl in the woods now, trying to find her way home. I can feel the big bad wolf creeping up behind me, breathing down my neck. Is the Old God the wolf? Or is my own mind the true danger? I feel like the longer I stay in these woods, the more my sanity drops. I need to get home. Both the figurative home and the literal one. I hear creaking in the distance. It takes me much longer this time, but I finally get home. I walk inside and breathe a sigh of relief. … Why does my head still hurt? I feel… so very strange… My head is pounding… Or is that my heart? Why is my house so dark? Didn’t I leave on the lights? I feel… so tired. It’s darker…. I close my eyes. I sleep. > T̶́͜҉ḩ̴̛̀́è̢͘͞O҉͟t̵̸̢͢͠h̸̨͘͠͞ę̶̛͏͜ŗ́͘͠S͘҉̴̢͡i̸̕d̵̷̨͡͝ȩ̷ > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Even as I stand, I know something is wrong. There is light in the windows, a green, sick light. The world feels new and perverse, diseased. Is that due to me? Is this my disease? Or is this the Mare’s doing? Or the God’s? I glance out the windows. There is nothing but a green sky and blank moon and dark, black trees. But my ears can hear the grimness, the watchfullness. Something watches. Something stirs. I know those eyes. I begin to move, quickly. I feel if I stay in this state of being for too long, I will break. I am so terribly scared. I start to open the door, with 2 big questions on my mind. Why does my mind feel so blank? And why can’t I seem to remember anything? “I have nightmares constantly!” I remember that much. “The same dream haunts me every night. A dream where I lose something… or someone?” I shake my head. “Every time, I forget the dream the moment I wake up. Thank goodness for that much.” I walk into the next room and twist the light. It flickers on. There are pictures of ponies I don’t know across the walls. I pay the pictures little mind. I don’t want to remember - I just want out! I go upstairs and get the next light quickly. Click, creeeak… The sounds make my ears twitch. They’re louder than I remember - not that I remember much. What do I remember? I try to review as I walk. My name is… What’s my name?... I twist the next light. It flashes on. Books appear in piles that I own. Twilight! Twilight Sparkle! I say the name in my mind as I walk to the next location quickly. I don’t want to forget my own name again. I get to the next room and quickly start to twist. Cli-click-cli-creea-eeaa- Knockknockknockknockknock! I scream, startled. The knocking was so loud, so real, so frightening. But I do not stop turning the light. It must come on. I need to see. To set things in order. No matter what. That is the only way to escape. I blink between doorways. Two clocks appear. I wind those to get to dawn - I remember. But I am not ready for dawn yet. The house is not in order… I… No. I want it to be dawn, but I need my house to be in order first. That is the most important aspect of this all. The Mare told me as much through my notes. Next room. The clicking of the light as I turn it makes me feel as though cockroaches are crawling up my neck. I shudder and keep twisting, ignoring the sensation. The light flashes on. The room is empty. Next room. It’s upstairs. I go up quickly and start to twist, ignoring the creaking in the house as it settles. It’s not the door opening. I have been thorough. There are no cracks in the house for guests to come through. I will not restart tonight. I walk to the next door and begin to unlock it, ignoring the drawn eyes on the ceiling. Why should those concern me? I want out of this house. I don’t care about it. I don’t care about the forest. I just want to leave. I go into the next room and twist the light on. I blink after the lights flash and another clock appears. I start to unlock the next door. After it creaks open, I start to wind and backtrack. I dart through the house quickly. Now that dawn is getting closer, he would- Lightning strikes. There is a breach. He is watching - the God. What was his name? I don’t recall. He is watching me. He knows that I remember. He is trying to make me go insane before I break free. Is he unhappy? I run. I wind as I pass a clock, letting it do the work. I run as fast as I can to the breach before any surprise guests stop in, and then I work on the light. He blinks, watching me. I can feel his grin. I shake my head and fix the light. The world shakes, the light flickers on, and the eye is gone. Hoofsteps are on the ground. He knows I have help. I can only hope he hasn’t found her yet. I go back downstairs and pass another clock. I wind it. Dawn is getting closer. I unlock another door and cross into the room, twisting the light as soon as I reach it. It flickers on after a moment, and after I blink, another clock appears. No breaches this time. I wind quickly. Will I be alone for the rest of the night? I go upstairs and twist a light on. I blink and a noose appears. He’s getting predictable. On the other side of the house, I feel a breach. Lightning strikes. I sigh. No way to reach it in time. I go upstairs and fix a light instead. As I twist it, another breach occurs. It is of no matter. Dawn is very close now. I mutter my name under my breath. I am Twilight Sparkle. I will not forget. I cannot forget. But what else have I forgotten? I blink. There is knocking on the door to the room below me. They are close. I glance to the left. A clock. I wind. Light streams through the windows. It is dawn. I glance outside. I see… houses. I remember a town… Happy ponies. A bakery. A farm. A boutique. A cottage. A cloud home with rainbows. A library with many gems. A home. The world goes dark as I close my eyes. I sleep. > F̸̧͡҉͘ ̕҉́a̴̡͟҉ ̶̴͏̷̀ḿ͠ ̨҉̸͟͞i̷͢͟ ͟͟l̶̀ ̵̀̕͠i̴̧ ̕͏a̵̢̕͜͢ ͏̴̴҉ŗ̨̀͜ ̶̷̢̀͞ì̷͢͠ ̶̧́͢t̛͢ ͟͟͠y̵̢̢͟ ̴͜҉̷̵ > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The instant I wake up, I feel at peace. I do not know why, but I am at rest now. I stand and begin to walk. The dark rooms have no need for light. I simply walk through the house, reviewing what I know. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I am… forgetting something. Possibly a lot. I want to know what I forgot, but it scares me. I have been here so long - can I ever go back? And who will lead me there? The Mare? The God? Myself? Or some 4th party that I have yet to meet? I have so much fear in me. I do not wish to learn what might happen. I want… I want, perhaps, to stay. But I know I cannot. I will lose my mind in this place, if I haven’t already. I cross upstairs, seeing drawings on the wall. I glance outside and stop in awe. The Mare in the Moon watches me from above. Stars surround her moon. They look… dim. 5 in all - 6? 4? It’s hard to remember. But I know she watches me. “Someone is staring at me from outside, constantly. What do they want? What? Is there something wrong with me?” There’s a lot wrong with me. I’ve been trapped in a never ending, looping hell for years now. Or has it been days? Perhaps it’s only been an hour. A second. It is impossible to tell time now. How many dawns have I lived in this false house? My hooves creak against the wood, but my ears hear the sharp click of my hooves against crystal tile. I am in many places at once. I want to know how I got here. I need to remember so much, I realize. How did I think I was ready to leave yet? I pass through many rooms, pausing again at a window. I peek outside - I see the Mare again, but the stars are closer to her. I squint at the ground. I am so high up… But there, in the darkness, I see figures shifting. “I can see you! Who are you?!” There is no response, but the familiarity of those shadowy figures make me want to scream. I should know them. Who are they? I walk through the clean house more. Who was cleaning here? Another S name hangs on my tongue. I shake my head. I can’t quite remember. I just keep walking and searching. I find a clock and begin to wind it. I watch the time go by. I hear the clock chime. It is four o’clock. The door beside me opens into the forest. I glance outside hesitantly. This forest… It reminds me of… of home. Ponyville! I gasp, eyes wide. Ponyville is the town I saw in the distance! This is the Everfree Forest! Or, well, a facsimile of it. It is a memory, warped into a prison. But oh, it is familiar and it is good. I remember traveling through the forest many times, beyond the times I sought out Luna. I remember flowers. Animals. A friend - there were things in the forest besides monsters! Z… Zecora! That had been her name! And Applebloom, yes, a little filly named Applebloom had been there too! And… And… My mind runs blank. I know there was more, but I can not grasp it… No matter. No matter, it is still long until dawn! I have time now to explore, to learn, to… to remember. I need to learn what had happened to this forest. To… To my memories. I head out, once more, into the brink. I walk through the dead trees sadly. They are screaming, silently. Was this what my mind had done to this place? Had I done this with my insanity? No. No, this was my enslavers doing. The God. He had imprisoned me. Trapped me here. I clutch for his name, but cannot remember. No matter. Long until dawn, long until I leave. I can remember by then. I wander the forest, using Luna’s light to guide me. She guides me straight to the monsters. I gasp as I see one and shield my eyes. They are not good for my sanity. I know this! But I hear them whisper… SURPRISE! Or shout. But that voice…. I knew that voice. I peeked through my hooves. The pony with a box on their head. They aren’t moving at all, looking the opposite way. They look… peaceful. I drop my hooves. I… am not scared. It does not see me, but I see it. My sanity only drops if I touch them, I realize… Isn’t this exciting? Are you excited? ’Cause I’m excited, I’ve never been so excited!! I laugh to myself, giggling a tiny bit. How… well, exciting! But I glance at the sky and realize I have limited time. Any moment now, the God will come back. He cannot see me outside. He will get mad, go mad, make this infinitely harder. I must be back soon. I nod to the pony and pass her by. She giggles as I pass. I continue to walk. I suppose I am just trying to find my way home; the Mare is in the moon, not the woods. I pass another monster, the straitjacket. I hear her clearly. We here at Sweet Apple Acres sure do like making new friends! Sweet Apple Acres? But that was in Ponyville! That meant… I knew these voices long before I heard them in dark hallways in the dark corners of my mind. Why, I'd say you're already part of the family! Had these words been said to me? Why are these words so familiar? Had I heard them in my home? Why was it only now that I could remember? I… I had so many questions. I keep walking. More will come with time, and hopefully with answers. I hear Owlicious - yes, that is his name - in the trees, guiding me towards my home. It is so terribly far… There is a shade in the mist. Oops! I guess I overdid it! Um, uh, how about this? The voice is so hazy, yet I can remember the words clear as day. A mare’s voice. What’d I say? Ten. Seconds. Flat. I’d never leave Ponyville hanging! The shade passes and I nod. I had heard these words in Ponyville! These were… ponies I knew. I know these creatures. Was this what Luna had been trying to show me? I had to remember them before I could go back? I look up. The stars grew closer to the moon, slowly, but surely. Were they brighter? Who could tell? Not I, clearly. I hear a voice in the darkness, a giggling one. Invisible mare. Just a moment, please! I’m ‘in the zone’, at it’were! I smile despite myself, still walking. How… content, I suddenly feel. We are going to be the best of friends, you and I! I don’t doubt that. I spy a mare, covered in leaves, ahead of me in the path. I stop and wave hesitantly. O-Oh, m-my name is… O-Oh… Either she had never said her name, or I still could not remember. Either way, I could finally see my house in the distance. Luna had no visions for me anymore; I had remembered myself. Now, I had to remember them. The monsters. I nod goodbye to Leaf Pony and continue towards my house. Poor thing, you simply must get into bed… As I enter my house, I find I can not agree more. I see the world fade around me, dreading the next dream. I sleep.