Apple Bloom gets lost on a field trip, ending up inside the ruins of an old castle that a very strange, alien being calls home...a small collection of various funny and heartwarming little tales.
Apple Bloom probably shouldn't have checked out the garden in the ruins on the edge of the Everfree Forest. Now she's lost and has to take shelter in the odd, small castle nearby, much like Goldilocks taking shelter in the home of the Three Bears. What she doesn't know is that the castle's creator has returned to the planet. But hopefully, unlike Goldilocks, Apple Bloom has nothing to fear from the castle's owner.
A series of small little stories to warm the cockles of your heart! Enjoy. ^_^
How many times had Apple Jack insisted to her “Stay with the group when you’re on a field trip”? But no, no. With Sweetie Belle sick that day and Scootaloo in detention, Apple Bloom had been the only Cutie Mark Crusader in Ms. Cheerilee’s class that day when they’d gone out to the ruins on the far edge of the Everfree Forest. This meant she’d been quickly bored, not even the creepy statues littering the large green expanse around her had caught her attention. She had tried as hard as she could to listen to Ms. Cheerilee talk about the ruins, after all, nobody knew who’d built this wrecked little castle. It was far smaller than a normal castle, as if solely built for one, yet the design was unmistakable. Towering ramparts, spiked steeples, a few cracked gargoyles atop the blown-open roof, and a finely-cobbled brick road leading to what had surely been an ornate set of double doors.
Yet the walls were now cracked, parts of scaffolding even blown completely across the front lawn of the castle and around its now over-grown garden. The states of mighty beasts situated on either side of the walkway up to the castle were faded, all possible paint long gone, leaving them faintly chipped, white and sad. Immense chunks had fallen off of a chimera statue, leaving two stumps where heads should have been, and Apple Bloom sighed as she looked about.
It had been dumb of her to leave the group and linger behind. But no, no, she’d wanted to check out the garden, and had been looking at the overgrown bulbous flowers in the far back, with pedals draped open as if you were meant to simply lie back, relax, and enjoy a nice nap. A couch-flower sounded comforting, but when Apple Bloom had actually tried it out, the thing had closed up, depositing her inside of a soft chamber, tickling her with its big leaves.
About half an hour later she’d finally managed to break out by chewing through one of the leaves, but now her class was gone, and she was alone. She groaned, hanging her head, shaking her red mane back and forth as she plopped down by the decapitated head of a manticore statue. “Yeah, I understand how you feel.” She said, the thing’s head looking, interesting, surprised. It was almost as if the statues had been alive and having its head cut off had been suck a shock, it’s face had frozen that way.
Well, frozen MORE that way. It was a statue after all. Still, Apple Bloom reasoned the smart thing to do would be to stay where she was. It was getting very, very dark, and it wouldn’t be smart to walk along the edge of the Everfree Forest whilst the night sky glittered overhead. No, that’d be a terrible idea. Anything dumb enough to be near the forest at night was dead meat, there were Timberwolves and Cockatrices and Manticores in there! And she wasn’t strong like her sister, nor did she know any magic nor could she fly. Apple Bloom knew she wouldn’t stand a chance if she went out past the forest.
No, she’d take shelter inside this castle. At least there’d be shelter. And she was pretty sure she could get the door closed and seal it up from wandering Timberwolves. Lugging the head of the manticore statue inside the double doors, she grunted a bit, heaving it forward with constant pushes before, at last, it was inside the one working, open door still remaining. She rolled the head of the statue against the door, sealing it shut. Phew.
Apple Bloom glanced about the castle. The walls were a faded dark blue, parts of them had been worn down and chipped open by time, but not enough for a big, deadly animal to get through. There was one rather large hole near the roof at the intersection of the wall, just over a large mahogany bookshelf, but Apple Bloom wasn’t worried. Timberwolves couldn’t climb! So they’d not be getting in. She’d be fine.
So the little pony trotted her way across torn and tattered carpets, humming to herself as she looked about for someplace to sleep. They’d not actually gone very deep inside the castle, Ms. Cheerilee had been saving that for another trip tomorrow. So she made her way past the main hall and into a hallway that brought her to a spiraling staircase. It towered high above her, going to the second floor, various paintings lining the walls around her as she briefly looked at them-
Odd. They were definitely not ponies, with the exception of a nice portrait of Princess Celestia and Luna. This made her get closer as her eyes slightly narrowed, trying to read the caption beneath. “From your two best greatest rivals on this world. All the best!”
Hmm. Was this, perhaps, Discord’s castle? No, couldn’t be. He’d have chairs on the ceiling and wallpaper you could peel off and eat. This was too fancy-pancy-schmancy. So Apple Bloom shrugged, continuing up the spiral stairway before, at last, popping up onto the second floor. She walked across the carpet, admiring how beautifully it had been made. Even now, centuries after it’s creation, it was still so soft to the touch, with faintly twinkling stars barely visible in the cross-stitching. She rubbed a hoof across it, nodding a bit before catching sight of the room at the far end of the long hallway.
A bedroom! Bright blue down blanket on a king-sized bed from the looks of it. She took off and jumped onto it, happily bouncing up and down with a delighted laugh. “Weee! It’s so soft and fuzzy!” Apple Bloom remarked out loud, snuggling up against a pillow almost as big as she was, a slightly faded white thing which was poofed up in her hooves before Apple Bloom crawled under the covers. There wasn’t that much dust there, surprisingly, but she didn’t mind. She just yawned, and curled up slightly, resting her head against the pillow, allowing sleep to slowly slip into her.
It made its way towards its old home, sighing slightly as it pushed aside some brushes with a clawed hand. It’s pale blue eyes looked the small castle over with unmistakable nostalgia as it sighed, running a hand down the walls. It had remembered when it had first made the castle, crafting the bricks, carving the statues, cultivating the garden. It remembered the blood, sweat and tears it had poured into this temporary home, and it sighed sadly. Living for centuries didn’t take away the pain of realizing how time could take and take and take. It barely dulled it.
“I was barely a century old when I made you. Now you’re falling apart.” The horned being sighed, shaking his head back and forth before looking off into the distance, a thoughtful expression on his features. “I wonder how Celestia and Luna are? Are they still alive? I hope they are. It would be good to talk to them.”
He made his way to the front door, blinking as he realized something was keeping him from opening it. “Someone blocked it from inside?” He murmured, shrugging before actually putting some real strength into his shove.
The statue head rolled along the floor, the alien being sighing as he walked into the main hall, picking it up. “Ohhh. Five hours to hunt you down, and look at you.” He mumbled. “Does nobody appreciate true art?” He asked, putting the head down on a nearby couch before making his way towards the stairway. However, he stopped in place and sniffed the air, eyes widening a bit. A pony. He smelled a pony nearby, and close. Looking intrigued, he walked up the stairs, making his way towards his bedroom and carefully pushing the door open. Sure enough, he saw her. A young little mare, just a foal, a little dibbun who was curled up under the covers of his old bed and snoring away.
He chuckled a bit at the sight before getting slightly down onto his knees to look at her slumbering, cute little face. She had the most adorable little bounce to her red mane, and soft yellow fur on her body, which was warm to his touch as he gently caressed her cheek. She murmured a bit in her slumber, “Just a few more minutes, Apple Jack, I’m so sleepy…”
“This is MY bed.” He thought to himself. “But, still…she looks so cute in it.” Then an idea came to him. Ah ha! A large, fanged grin stretched across his face. “Won’t you be in for a treat.” He playfully cooed.
THE NEXT MORNING
Sunlight filtered gently in through the window as Apple Bloom let out a yawn, stretching her arms as she wiped the sleep from her eyes with her hooves. She smacked her lips a bit, the unmistakable scent of eggs wafting up from downstairs as she blinked in surprise, tilting her head a little. Eggs? Why was-wait. Huh?
Somebody was in the castle. Yet if someone was in the castle and making eggs then why hadn’t they tried to wake her up or-
She had to know. Apple Bloom hopped out of the bed and carefully snuck down the hallway, heading down each step to the first floor as carefully and quietly as she could, flinching at every faint squeak the floorboard made. The unmistakable smell of fresh eggs kept wafting through the air from a room to her far right as she poked her head in, seeing somebody place a plate of eggs down on a stone table along with some eating utensils, and that person turned, smiling warmly at her.
It was definitely not a pony. It was horned, like a minotaur, yet had no nostrils, no ears, and sharp clawed hands and toes. It wore no clothing but had a large necklace of unusual faint blue gems around its neck, and three gems embedded into its forehead. Its skin was as dark as the night sky, with faint glittering lights twinkling out from within its muscular, toned body, and it looked at her with its pale blue eyes, its voice ethereal, almost kindly and yet dark and somewhat terrifying in undertone. “Good morning.”
“Um…g-good morning?” Apple Bloom murmured quietly, trying not to freak out. It wasn’t because the thing was naked, no, there weren’t any genitals or anything exposed. It was “decent”, it didn’t appear to have any weapons, but the thing was, to put it bluntly, big. It must have been ten feet tall, and looked like it could easily hold her in the palm of its hand. “I, er, that is, if this is your home, I-I didn’t know, everyone in town says the place has been abandoned for years-”
“It is of no consequence. Here. Eat. You must be hungry.” The being said, sitting down in a stone chair opposite her as it poured some freshly-squeezed orange juice from fresh-picked oranges from its garden into a cup.
“You, er, have some lovely cups. Are they gifts from a friend?”
“Ah, my cups. Good thing about crystal cups and silverware is how long they last.” He admitted. “But no, I wouldn’t call them a gift from a “friend”, I-” The horned being sighed. “I do not really have any friends here. You see, Princess Celestia gave these to me after I taught her and Luna how to do a Petrification spell.”
“Wait. Petrification?” Apple Bloom suddenly got an idea. “Does that mean those statues out there-”
“Oh, yes. All real animals. It required a few ingredients, but when you pull it off right, you get instant art.” The horned being remarked. “It took me hours to track down the animals I wanted, but I am the Huntsman. It is simply what I do.” He informed Apple Bloom as she nervously looked about. “You needn’t worry. I won’t hurt you. If I wanted to, I would have just done it to you last night as you slept, after all. So please. Have a seat.”
Apple Bloom bit her lip, but made her way over to the seat, hopping into it and picking up the fork, tasting the scrambled eggs. They were surprisingly good, not runny, not too milky, and with a slight fried edge to it. She gave the Huntsman a smile with puffed up cheeks full of egg and kept eating. “Mmm! Dees err ‘eely ‘ood, mistuh.” (These are really good, mister!)
“I can tell. I know you ponies are primarily herbivores, but I’ve seen your race eat eggs and occasionally fish in Canterlot. Glad to see I was right about your kind enjoying eggs.” The Huntsman admitted with a wave of his hand as he sipped his orange juice.
“Dunno why ‘oo ought no fwuh, yah cookin’ kuh wid dem ovah.” (Don’t know why you’ve got no friends, your cooking could win them over!) Apple Bloom mumbled through the eggs, giving him a nod as she kept on munching away.
“Heh-heh. Such high praise from such a small thing.” The Huntsman remarked, resting his head on his hand. “Do tell me. What’s your name, my little pony?”
“Apple Bloom.” Apple Bloom said after swallowing down some of the eggs and wiping her lips. “So you’re called “The Huntsman”? Your first name is “The”?”
“It’s my title.” The Huntsman remarked with a chuckle. “I’m an alien, Apple Bloom. A Cosmo Sapien, a living galaxy. I set up a little home here many ages ago when I was looking for interesting challenges. Like your leaders, the two diarchs.” He admitted with a nod.
“Challenges?”
“Oh, yes. If they won, I’d teach them anything they’d like.” The alien being admitted to Apple Bloom with a flourish of his clawed hand. “If they lost, I’d eat them.”
Apple Bloom almost choked on her eggs, coughing and spluttering as she dropped the fork down onto the table, cringing and turning slightly pale. “E-E-Eat them?” No wonder he didn’t have any friends here!
“Yes, my species needs to eat living, sentient beings to survive. To stave off entropy, to help fuel us.” The Huntsman sipped his orange juice again with a careful, deliberate slurp before putting the glass down and leaning back in his chair, arms folded across his chest. “But please, tell me. Why were you here in my home?”
“I was…er…it was a class field trip, I sort of got lost in your garden.”
“It was the Bulbascious Gardenia, wasn’t it? The big flower with the large petals wide enough for you to lounge on?” The alien asked with a sigh and a shrug. “It got me with that too. It likes to capture people and tickle them. It has an odd sense of humor-” He stopped, seeing Apple Bloom was nervously looking off to the side and down towards the ground. She very clearly was disturbed and frightened of him. “…Apple Bloom, do you think I’m going to hurt you?”
“You said you wanted to eat the Princesses.”
The Huntsman sighed and held his head in one hand. He didn’t like having to explain this. “Apple Bloom…do you know what happens if a fire doesn’t have enough fuel?”
“It goes out?”
“Yes. Think of my species as very big bonfires. To keep blazing, we need good sources of fuel every once in a while. About half a month. If we don’t, our bodies start to give out, we get desperate and feral and cruel.” He admitted to her, his blue eyes gazing into her green. “I don’t like it. But I’m not just eating for one. I’m a living galaxy.”
“Are you really?” Apple Bloom asked, blinking a bit. Her natural curiosity was being peaked and the Huntsman gave her a playful little smile.
“Would you like me to prove it?” he asked. “Again, you have my vow I shall not harm you.”
Apple Bloom looked him over. He’d had plenty of chances to hurt her and hadn’t taken it. She didn’t think he really would hurt her, so she gave him a small nod as he smiled gently at her and walked over to where she was, putting out a clawed hand. She climbed into his palm as he held her to his chest.
“Feel it. Put your head against it and relax.” He offered to her as she felt his chest, rubbing her hooves over it. It was so soft and warm, like a big satin pillow that had been carefully heated up just enough to give you that little extra comfort on a winter day. She murred a little as she felt herself sinking into the soft expanse, her body being tenderly absorbed into the warmth. More and more of Apple Bloom sank into the Huntsman’s chest, yet it felt so…soothing and warm. It was like being massaged by soft pillows, and she soon found her head now in a wide, immense abyss of blackness.
Within moments though, the darkness gave way to pure beauty, as the wide expanse of space stretched out before her. Stars twinkled about, a planet circling below her, spiraling around a sun as a tiny moon hovered nearby. There were a few other planets off in the distance as a shooting star passed by Apple Bloom, and she saw its trail blazing bright blue, just like the Huntsman’s eyes. “Woooooowwww.” She whispered, eyes bugging out as wide as saucers as she faintly felt the Huntsman rubbing her, though he was nowhere near her in the wide abyssal expanse of space.
“Ready to come out?” The Huntsman asked her as if he was sitting right behind her and she gave a nod, finding herself plopping out of his chest and into his palm again as he warmly looked down at her. “Did you like that?” He asked.
“That. Was. AWESOME!” She exclaimed, spreading her arms wide. “You’re so big on the inside! I mean, you’re big now, but you’re even bigger in there, I-I just, wow! So cool!”
“Yes. It’s a beautiful place inside me.” He admitted as he put Apple Bloom down on the floor, kneeling so she didn’t have to strain her neck so much to look at him, Apple Bloom thinking a bit about what she’d just seen, a sad expression coming to her face.
“But you gotta eat people to keep all that beautiful stuff going?” She asked.
“Yes.” He quietly said, giving her a gentle nod. “I try to make sure there is no pain, but yes. I do.”
“You wouldn’t eat me, right?”
“No. You’re a child, I try to avoid hurting children.”
“But you’ve done it before haven’t you?” She also asked as he nervously looked away from her. “You don’t need to answer. I get it.”
“Sometimes there’s no good options. Sometimes you’re dealt a terrible hand and have to live with it.” He told her as he stood up and headed out the kitchen door, Apple Bloom trailing after as he walked along the carpeted floor, making for the front door. “I’ve been trying to find a way to sustain myself without that type of feeding, but it simply hasn’t worked.” He pushed the door open, gesturing at the early morning rays of sunlight. “But you don’t have to worry about me. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you and your family is probably worried sick. I’ll walk you to the edge of the Everfree just to be safe and you can head the rest of the way home on your own.”
“What’s your name?” Apple Bloom asked as they made their way down the walkway, the Huntsman looking down at her, blinking slightly in surprise. “I mean, your real name.”
“Neh-Buh-Loh. Why?”
Apple Bloom smiled. “Because friends ought to know each other’s names.”
Everyone has special little things dear to them. Hand-me-downs, heirlooms, precious items full of sentimental value. Sometimes expensive, sometimes cheap, yet all priceless in their own way. And Apple Bloom was quite happy to finally get to look at the Huntsman's most precious item...or at least his most second, after an old, faded photograph of him and his sister.
The necklace. It throbbed and hummed in her hold, Apple Bloom's eyes wide in delight and awe as she felt how oddly cool and comforting it was to hold. She rubbed the top of one of the majestic gems that made up the light blue/white crystal necklace the Huntsman wore, the thing humming more loudly as she let out an "Oooh" at it.
"I crafted it with my father, truth be told. It took me a while. Several days straight of solid work, but, at long last, I'd formed the cosmic matter into what you now hold." The starry-bodied being informed her, his ethereal voice wafting across the lake as he sat atop a stump, getting a fishing pole ready before launching the baited hook through the air. "You like it?"
"Oh, it's just amazing!" The young foal admitted. "You made this from planets?"
"Dead planets, yes. We're living galaxies, using dead planets and stars is far easier to manipulate than it would be for any of your race. It's as easy for us as your kind can smith a horseshoe." The alien hunter remarked before blinking, pale blue eyes narrowing as he reeled the hook back in, holding up a large Salmon and grinning, tossing the catch into a bucket he had with him. "You know, many of the stars in the night sky are actually dead themselves." He said, gesturing at the sky, the sun beginning to set over the horizon, the first stars popping up in the velvet of night above.
"They don't look it." Apple Bloom admitted, looking back at the necklace, then up at the sky.
"Just because something isn't alive, "with us" anymore doesn't mean it can't be beautiful." The Cosmo Sapien informed her, letting out a yawn as he tossed out the line over the lake once more, a fish falling for the bait once again. Thwoop! He yanked it back. "My, the fish here are very, very stupid. They keep falling for the same bait."
"What kind of bait ARE you using?" Apple Bloom wished to know, trotting over to him, the necklace put around her own neck as he put some of his bait onto the hook again, Bloom sniffing it. "...EWWW. That smells like rotten fish!"
"It IS a type of fish, actually."
"...wait, so these fish are cannibals?!" Apple Bloom asked, cringing. "Yechhh!"
"I'm kidding. It's a type of peanut butter I mixed with fish pheromones. The smell wafts through the water, making the fish attracted, thinking it's a girl fish...or a boy fish. And then-POW! Peanut butter." The Huntsman chuckled, tossing the line back into the lake as the moon began to make its way across the sky above, the alien hunter grinning at Apple Bloom. "They can't resist. Peanut butter works amazingly well with smaller animals. Try it if you want to catch some mice or squirrels. They go "nuts" for it. Pun intended."
Apple Bloom nodded, looking down at the necklace as she took it off her neck, biting her lip. "Um...Mister Neh-Buh-Loh? Do you mind if I take this, you know, into class tomorrow? It's show and tell, and I'd really like to show something interesting for it. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon always show me up and it would be nice to just finally bring in something really cool for everyone to see."
"Of course." the Huntsman told her, reeling in a final fish and plopping it into the bucket before kneeling down and patting her atop her head with a playful little smile. "As long as you are careful with it, you may show it off. Just say it's from a friend. And perhaps you would like me to tell you how my family forged these?"
"Oh, yes, I would!" Apple Bloom said, eagerly nodding as her alien friend picked the fish and fishing pole up, the two making their way through a long, winding forest path. The moonlight filtered softly through the canopy above, a soft wind blowing as she and her friend kept talking into the night, almost totally past her bedtime. Tomorrow was going to be a good day.
Apple Bloom waited patiently, the necklace in her little backpack as Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon showed off what they'd brought into the yellow and green-painted walls of Ms. Cheerilee's classroom. She had to admit, it was pretty impressive: they'd gotten hold of tiny little statues that they'd had carved from ivory and and Diamond Tiara wouldn't stop talking about it, the young pink coal grinning broadly as she stroked her own statue slowly as if petting it. Her purple and white hair was finely arranged today just like Silver Spoon's own lovely grey hair was tied into a perfect ponytail, Silver Spoon adjusting her glasses to look over at Apple Bloom, who confidently smirked as she put her hoof on her backpack.
"Why's she so...smug?" Diamond Tiara thought inwardly with a slight frown before Ms. Cheerilee nodded her magenta head at the two and they put their little statues away in their backpacks. "Did she or one of her blank flank friends bring in something that could top...no. No, they can't possibly mess this up for us the way she did Pet Day."
Indeed, Pet Day had been rather infamous. Apple Bloom had brought in Wynona as her pet, the delightful dog winning over most of the class whilst Sweetie Belle had brought in Opal the Cat and...well...er...
Things had not looked good because the two kept giving each other looks and were on the verge of a full-on attack, both growling darkly as Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle tried to keep them restrained. But Scootaloo didn't really have a pet, so she'd just grabbed hold of a green frog whilst Diamond Tiara had snootily shown off her own acquisition.
"My presentation is this adorably majestic Orchestral Cricket strain, worth 100 bits alone." She'd explained to Ms. Cheerilee, the cricket on the table playing a perfect imitation of a violin with its legs as soft music drifted through the room. Scootaloo simply sat nearby with her plain ol' green frog, "harrumphing" at the sight as Diamond Tiara smirked. "He can perform any type of symphony you ask of him, and he's a special present from my father. There's only a thousand of them in existence and they normally sell for ten times what I got him for, but the owner owned my daddy a favor. AND!" She gave Apple Bloom the biggest smirk she and her friends ever saw, every inch of the smile oozing smugness like a chemical spill. "It can dance."
However, it could not hop away to safety to save it's life, because Scoot's plain ol' green frog leapt free of the little unicorn's grip, plopping onto the table and swallowing the cricket in a single gulp.
"HEY!" Diamond Tiara shrieked.
"Wow. This is almost a religious experience." Scootaloo admitted to Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle as the frog burped, Diamond Tiara tugging at her hair as the other foals in the room gasped or laughed or stared in stunned silence.
"ARRRRRRRGGGHHHH!"
No, Diamond Tiara didn't want a repeat of that day. So she watched Apple Bloom closely as she and Silver Spoon sat down, gaping in surprise as Apple Bloom pulled out an enormous and majestic necklace of an unknown crystal that shimmered in the light of the room.
"This is a gift, a real nice necklace that-" Apple Bloom hesitated before continuing on. "That I made for a friend. I crafted it out of this meteorite that fell in our field a while back. Took me a long time, but...I did it!"
"Oh my, it's positively dazzling!" Ms. Cheerliee remarked as she clasped her hooves together and beamed, Diamond Tiara frowning as the kids all crowded around, Apple Bloom letting them and Ms. Cheerilee examine the necklace.
"It's warm. How's it so warm?"
"It's kinda vibrat-y, you know?"
"Can I lick it? It kinda smells nice too."
"NO, Snips."
"You really made this?"
"Yeah! I made it!" Apple Bloom said, inwardly flinching. What was the harm? It was just show and tell. Not a big deal. Not really. So she smiled at them all before putting the necklace back in her backpack and heading back to her chair, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle smiling broadly at her.
"What a great show and tell presentation." Sweetie Belle admitted, nodding eagerly. "Everyone thinks its so beautiful. And to think you crafted it all by yourself? Did you get a cutie mark from it-oh, no, you didn't, obviously, but still!"
"I guess not all our gifts have to be broadcasted on our sides." Scootaloo admitted. "I'm jealous you're so good at that stuff."
Apple Bloom nervously rubbed the back of her neck, blushing. "Well, you know, I...I try."
Inwardly, she felt kind of queasy. Applejack had always insisted that she be honest and decent. Especially with her friends. And the Huntsman had been straight-up honest with her about who he was, what he was, and what he could do. He'd only had one rule: say this stuff was from "a friend". And she was breaking it. It was only show and tell, but...
...still...
Meanwhile, the Huntsman was in the woods, a bunny tied down to a tree stump as he sharped a knife made of cosmic matter on his claws, sighing as the thing began struggling to get free. "Look, please don't make this difficult." He insisted quietly. "I'll snap your neck and I promise, you won't feel a thing. But I need to eat something to slightly stave off my hunger even if it means eating a cute little bunny."
"Can't we talk about this?"
The Huntsman frowned, blue eyes slightly narrowing. He really, really hated this. He needed to feed on sentient beings to keep alive and he had figured that a barely sentient animal wouldn't make him feel guilty. But now, hearing this thing's begging, he was hesitating. "I-look, I simply cannot let you go. I have to stave off entropy somehow. When you're a living galaxy, the needs of your body are great."
"Can't you just go on a diet? You know, lettuce is very good for dieters. Celery's even better. My owner Fluttershy always insists I eat more celery but I'm too into those little tomatoes."
"You've an owner?" The Huntsman asked quietly. "...not...wild?"
"No. My name is Angel and my owner is Fluttershy. She lives by the edge of the forest, I was out trying to find some wild truffles for dinner tonight. I might not be a pig, but I can track them down pretty well!"
The Huntsman sighed, then leaned down, cutting Angel free with a swift motion of his claws, waving his hand in the air. "Just go, get-get going." He mumbled, Angel giving him a simple nod before leaping away, the Huntsman sitting on the stump and holding his head in his hands. This was going to be problematic. He needed to eat something sentient in at least two weeks, and if he didn't, he'd start to starve. What was he going to do?
An appetite suppressant would help keep hunger pains away. But did this country advance enough to sell appetite suppressants, he wondered. He'd ask Apple Bloom. It was good to have someone trustworthy in this world he could immediately turn to for help.
...
...
...
...Apple Bloom, naturally, had been quite happy to talk to the Huntsman about her amazing presentation. But she wanted more. She wanted to show off even more fantastic stuff to her classmates. The look in their eyes, how their pupils had lit up upon seeing the necklace, the way they'd all crowded around her, fascinated, voices filled with awe and wonder and joy, she wanted to relieve that again. So she of course had asked
"Do you have anything else I could give to them for show and tell?"
The Huntsman ceased cutting up the slice of chocolate cake he'd been making in his little abode, holding up the cosmic knife he'd been carrying around since yesterday, and he gave a small little smile as he put it down next to Apple Bloom, then passed his hand over his chest, carefully pulling out a small ball of light. It glimmered brightly before he put it into a piece of himself he carefully peeled off, forming a tiny cage of cosmic matter that wrapped about the ball like a birthday present. The starry-bodied being tied it neatly up before giving it to Apple Bloom, giving the little filly a small smile. "A star. Very small, compressed to fit inside this cage, but a star nontheless. Feel."
He handed it to Apple Bloom, who grunted as she struggled to hold it up. "OOH. It's heavy!"
"It has it's own center of gravity. Observe." The Huntsman admitted as he took the star from her, holding up a fork nearby, the fork humming and twitching back and forth before flying right into the cage, now circling around it like a moon did to a planet. "It's own gravitational pull. Here, here, let's try this." He chuckled, caaaarefully pouring a tiny bit of chocolate milk towards the cage as the milk droplets whizzed about the cage like little dancers. Apple Bloom giggled as they whizzed about, the Huntsman taking the fork away, then gobbling up the droplets of chocolate milk with careful, deliberate bites. "Mmm. Yummy!"
"Wow. Amazing!"
Apple Bloom poured a few more droplets over the cage before her class as they whizzed about the little star, Apple Bloom putting the cider to the side before twirling about, then holding the cage up high. The star twinkled in the cage, the droplets sweeping about it in perfect symmetry as Apple Bloom danced about, twirling like a ballerina. Sweetie Belle had quite happily provided some lovely concerto music to fit the mood whilst Scootaloo's scooter had helped get the star into the room. After all, the thing was pretty darn heavy!
But it was worth it. Silver Spoon's attempt to show off her new pearl necklace had been nothing compared to this majestic and beautiful thing in her hooves. The class sat in their chairs in absolute awe of this little wonder that Apple Bloom was showing off from the "meteorite in her backyard".
"Can you believe it? A little star." She said at last, putting the cage onto Ms. Cheerilee's desk, as the desk slightly creaked under the weight, Cheerilee examining the cage and quickly scribbling notes. "Isn't it beautiful?"
"You are most definitely getting an 'A Plus' on your presentation." Ms. Cheerilee complimented with a sage nod, Apple Bloom positively beaming with delight. Everyone was loving what she had to show, and she was soaking in every moment of their praise.
And so it continued over the week. First had come the necklace, then a little star. Then she'd brought in a ball of cosmic matter that would shape itself to anything she wished. Then the next day after that, a tiny little planet, with everyone crowding around the table she put it on as Ms. Cheerilee examined the world under a microscope. And unbeknownst to her, gave the planet it's new god.
"ALL HAIL THE PONY!" Came the cry from below.
"Praise it's cuteness! It's muzzle! It's strong and bouncy hair!"
"Especially that strong and bouncy hair."
"Are they...saying something down there?" Ms. Cheerilee murmured before she noticed the inhabitants of the city she was looking down at were definitely getting on bended knee and bowing up at her. "Oh! Uh...um...well!" She blushed. "I, er...might want to, ah...keep this overnight." She mumbled out.
"GRRRR." Diamond Tiara muttered darkly as she and Silver Spoon made their way out of the schoolhouse, the foal stomping down hard as she sulked in frustration. "That stupid blank flank is totally showing us up! What next? An entire miniature galaxy?"
"You know if I actually find one in that meteorite, I'll bring it in!" Apple Bloom said, popping up between the two before heading out with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, Diamond Tiara tugging at her hair.
"GAAAAAAAH! We need to put her in her place before she gets too big for her britches!" Diamond Tiara snarled. "But how? What could we get that's even greater than what she's shown?"
Silver Spoon suddenly got a dark smirk. "That meteorite she talks about. Let's follow her and see where it is, and steal it from her. Then WE can have all the nice things to bring in to show and tell and she'll be reduced to just bringing in stupid frogs and stuff!"
"..."
"Sorry. Too soon?"
"No kidding!"
And so, bags slung over their back, tools at the ready, the two kept hidden in the dark recesses of the forest, carefully slinking along in the shadows as evening began to fall. Yet Apple Bloom made her way not back towards her home, but instead took a detour towards a house the two didn't recognize, a house almost utterly overgrown in undergrowth as a figure seemed to stand illuminated in the doorway. A figure with a body like a galaxy and bright blue eyes-
With a very familiar necklace around his neck.
The two colt's eyes went wide before they nodded at each other, tiptoeing across the front lawn after Apple Bloom and the odd person headed inside the house, and they put their ears to the door, listening in through some of the cracks upon it.
"They loved the little planet, Mr. Huntsman."
"Well, it's my pleasure, Apple Bloom. I'm happy to let my talents be shared for a friend. Thanks for getting these appetite surpressants for me, I'm, well...not entirely sure I could safely enter the town without attracting undue attention. I don't quite believe the ponies here would be ready for the knowledge that an alien is here among them. Not until I've talked to Princess Celestia and Luna."
"Oh, the letter! Right!" Apple Bloom slapped her forehead. "I should check the mailbox and see if that letter you gave me to send came back with a reply! I'll do it tomorrow, I promise." She swore. "Cross my heart and hope to die."
"Would you, perhaps, like to bring ME in for show and tell when things have settled?" The Huntsman asked bemusedly.
"Oh, definitely! But for now, what could top a little planet? The week's over but I want something really good to show off for next week that'll really set the bar!"
"How about a little solar system? It'd take some effort, and a full day of careful searching and focus, but I could hold a solar system in a cage of cosmic matter the same way I did for the star or the planet I gave you. Would you like that?"
Diamond Tiara's eyes narrowed as she turned to Silver Spoon, nodding. Silver Spoon carefully slunk up the undergrowth growing on the side of the wall, aiming their camera at the window, taking several pictures. Snap-snap-snap. Thank goodness they took the flash off or they'd get caught for sure!
A few moments later and the footage was theirs, the two racing off as the Huntsman seemed to briefly glance at the door before turning to Apple Bloom. "Apple Bloom, you've been saying these are gifts I gave you, correct?" He asked.
"Oh, yeah!" Apple Bloom quickly insisted with some firm nodding. "Absolutely. And that way when I introduce you for real everyone will think you're really nice! Heh-heh...heh."
The Huntsman rubbed his chin thoughtfully before giving her a nod. "There's something better I think I'd like to show you. Here."
He slowly reached into his chest before his hand carefully pulled out a sepia-toned photograph that appeared to be of himself and a younger type of alien like he was, with tiny little stubby horns on her forehead in addition to the mighty ones on the side of her skull, and with a cute little set of crystal wristbands around her wrists. "Go ahead. Touch it." He said, holding it out for Apple Bloom as she reached out with her hoof as it passed over the table, brushing up against-
The picture now moved, Apple Bloom hearing the unmistakable sound of the Huntsman and a very chipper and feminine voice ringing through the air, as if a scene was playing out before her, the two getting into position.
"Okay, just sit right up here on my lap!"
"You're sure it's going to take the picture?"
"I'm sure, Nee."
"Okay. One! Two! Three! CHEEEESE!"
"And it's done!"
"My smile captured for all eternity. Think people will think I'm cute?"
"How can anyone not? But you're not dating anyone until you turn 18."
"Hey! No fair." A pout from the female as the Huntsman rubbed "Nee's" head with a laugh and she giggled. "Oh, you!"
"Don't ever change." He chuckled.
"Is that your sister?" Apple Bloom asked, withdrawing the hoof as she felt a slight cold settle over her like a blanket that had been assaulted for hours by an air conditioner.
"Yes. Her name is Nee-Buh-Loh. I'm sort of still trying to find her. And I had heard a rumor she was here, so..." The Huntsman rubbed the back of his neck as he put the photo on the table. "I hope to find her before I starve, honestly. Could take some time, but...she's the only family I have left and the only other one of my species. The rest of us died off because we were very...selfish. And very cruel. We were punished and only I and my sister survived."
Apple Bloom hung her head, biting her lip.
"But you don't need to know of such sad things. I just wanted to share the photo with you. My species could take a moment and enshrine it like that, and that memory is a very dear one to me." He admitted. "And now I can share it with you. I'm really enjoying sharing all this with you."
"...you've been giving and giving and all I've done is take and take." Apple Bloom realized. "Even taking credit."
The Huntsman folded his arms over his chest. "Whatever do you mean?"
Apple Bloom hesitated, then began to talk.
...
...
...
... "Dear Princess Celestia..."
"Did not see this coming." Diamond Tiara admitted quietly, she and Silver Spoon gaping at the sight of the Princesses as they walked out of the forest with the starry-bodied being by their side as he waved slightly at them all before getting on one knee before the princesses.
"It's good we got your letter. Apple Bloom's handwriting was slightly sketchy, but we understood what needed to be done. We'll try and find some sustenance for you whilst sending out scouts to find your sister." Princess Celestia proclaimed, her rainbow mane flowing freely in the breeze as she put a golden hoof upon her chest, Luna bowing her head.
"I've learned something. You can't take advantage of your friends, and you need to be honest and grateful with them for all they do for you."
"And all things considered, it's very good to see you again." The lunar diarch admitted as her nightly mane drooped slightly down, the Huntsman rising up. "You know, I never did ask you. I know your father once visited here many eons ago. Did he, by any chance..." She pointed at her mane, raising an eyebrow up as the Huntsman scratched his head.
"That would be quite the discovery. I never got the chance to ask him. Would you be able to take a blood sample to test for such a thing? I think I'd just absorb the needle by accident."
"He's...he's a living galaxy? REALLY?" The purple-furred Twilight Sparkle gaped as she looked from the princesses to the Huntsman before Apple Bloom nodded, standing nearby to her alien friend. "I...this raises so many questions!"
"I'll try and give answers."
"It's easy to get swept up in the moment and to enjoy the great things your friends do for you, but you can't let that keep you from thanking them for all you did. And you certainly shouldn't take credit for what they did just to make yourself feel better."
"Young lady...I think you got a lotta explainin' to do yourself." Apple Bloom's sister remarked with a slight frown, pointing at her with an orange hoof as Apple Bloom blushed. "Why didn't y'all just tell me you were helpin' to hide an alien in the forest?"
"Well, I wanted to cover for him because he was my friend. I felt I kind of owed it to him because he was so nice to me." Apple Bloom admitted. "But I guess I should have been honest sooner. It would have been a lot easier."
Even if you make mistakes, if you're honest about them, real friends will understand.
The ponies of Ponyville murmured amongst each other as Apple Bloom deeply blushed. She wasn't quite sure what would happen now. But hopefully now that everyone knew and the Princesses were here, things wouldn't be too scary for them all. But most of all, she was glad that Neh-Buh-Loh had been so forgiving. Now there was just one thing left to do.
"I think you'll all really love him though. I mean, he can do this!" Apple Bloom admitted, putting her hoof squarely into his leg as it sank in firmly as it passing through water, the hoof then sticking out of his chest as she waved it about. "Helloooo!"
"Well this beat's MY show and tell." Snips sighed as he put down the cardboard box he'd brought before a frog leapt out of it and landed right in front of Diamond Tiara, letting out a loud "ribbet" as her eyelid twitched, her mouth slowly opening.
Apple Bloom could tell when her friends were hiding things from her. And she knew that Neh-Buh-Loh was hiding his hunger.
He'd been incredibly patient these past few days. The ponies of the town had all been eager to learn more about him, they'd rubbed up and down his body to feel the texture of his skin, Twilight had examined his hand under a microscope, they'd tested out how they could put one part of their body into him and have it come out the opposite end and, yes, they'd of course saw him demonstrate the use of tantric energy. He had been very patient. And she could sort of understand. He was a big time predator hundreds of years old, surrounded by "little dinners", as it were, and here he was, trying not to take a bite as they rubbed themselves all over him, essentially.
All because he wanted Apple Bloom to trust and respect him. To prove he was a good friend. And to prove he was stronger than his instincts.
And to that level, he had insisted he'd go the extra mile and not even eat a single animal. Not one drop of meat until the mighty royal diarchs of the land discovered a way, as they promised, to ensure he could take in living, sentient beings without consuming them. A way to feed without ending the lives of others. The issue was that he'd gone without eating for two weeks now. Two weeks.
And with his skinnier frame, his slightly emaciated cheeks and the fact he had completely conked out onto his lunch plate, he was beginning to look it.
He grunted a bit, rubbing his head as he looked up from the table, realizing he'd fallen asleep and passed out in his pizza. "...sorry." He sheepishly remarked to Apple Bloom as she and Applejack sat around the table, Big Mac entering with a checklist of all the animals that Apple Bloom would have to help look after while they were gone and out of town for the next two days to pay a visit to Babs in Manehatten. However, it wasn't just them. Rarity and her sister Sweetie Belle were visiting their parents over the weekend as well, Twilight was going to the old castle of the sisters in the woods along with Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy to look through old books and tomes for a solution to the Huntsman's unique problem, and that meant Apple Bloom, Spike and Scootaloo were going to have to look after all of the left-over pets.
And the Huntsman wanted to help.
"You should probably wipe that ol' slice of yer face." Applejack admitted, pointing with an orange hoof as her green eyes glittered with a faint delight. "Though I'm glad you like our brand of pizza. Usually people don't much like fruit pizza. They prefer those...Flim Flam Brother's deep dish delights." She muttered, almost spitting on the floor at the mere mention of the name 'Flim Flam Brothers' as if it was a curse word.
"I wish to know that if I pass out in my pizza, I shan't drown. Deep dish pizza is not pizza. It's an above-ground swimming pool for rats. I don't want to be able to toss a coin into my pizza to make a wish. And know that if I COULD make such a wish, I would wish for better pizza." The Huntsman remarked wryly.
"...wait, you didn't actually FIND a rat in their pizza, now didja?" Applejack asked, Apple Bloom about to raise her slice of apple-slices pizza to her lips before halting in place.
The Huntsman gave her a quiet look. "Do you want the honest answer or the one that won't make you vomit?"
"Honesty is always the best policy for me." Applejack insisted as she put her hat off and held it over her chest, Big Mac WISELY exiting the room so as to not hear.
"Yes. Yes, I did. They tried to bribe me with a deep dish pizza and I found half a dead rat in it. I'm fairly sure that's not meant to be a "secret ingredient"." The Huntsman intoned with a frown. "Needless to say, I immediately informed their customers of this and your town's health depar-"
Applejack immediately bolted for the bathroom as Apple Bloom sloooooowly put down her piece of pizza and pushed it away. "WELL! I'm never eating anything again ever!" She proclaimed. "But, look, um...Nebby, I know you said you wanted to help me and Scoots and Spike with the pet-sitting but are you SURE you can handle it?" She wanted to know, placing her little yellow hooves on the table, eyes solemn and inquisitive. "Because if you think you're gonna accidentally want to start putting, like..." She waved a hoof in the air. "Barbecue sauce on any of them, you should let me know right now. And maybe you're one of those people who does sleep-eating. I'll understand."
"Sleep-eating?" The Huntsman asked. "No, I don't believe so. I don't even snore. Why do you suggest that?"
"I don't want a repeat of the last time we went out camping." Apple Bloom told Big Mac as she, he and Applejack laid down in sleeping bags outside, Granny Smith reading a book in the kitchen, the light visible through their tent. Big Mac raised an eyebrow up, confused at this as Apple Bloom gave him a light poke on the nose.
"Whaddya mean?" He asked.
"Because the last time we did, you dreamed you were in the Land of Giant Burritos and tried to eat us."
"Oh, don'tcha go bein' so paranoid. I'm just fine." He said, tucking himself away in his sleeping bag as Apple Bloom yawned a bit and snuggled up in her own bright red sleeping bag, all of them looking like big, red lil' caterpillars in a row.
"Well, g'night, guys." She said. "Sweet dreams."
"...buenas noches."
"AAAA!!! APPLEJACK, WAKE UP!"
"...just...better safe than sorry!" Apple Bloom said swiftly.
Soon enough, The Huntsman was in Fluttershy's hut, Angel the bunny giving him a look as he folded his arms across his furry chest. The Huntsman scribbled down notes from Fluttershy as she calmly informed him of what he needed to do. "Make sure to give him a bath, give all of them a bath, use the big wooden tubs in the back shed. And don't use the extra bubbly bubble bath, because it makes their fur poof out too much." Fluttershy asked politely, the Huntsman nodding his horned head, continuing to write.
"Absolutely. Of course."
"And remember, be firm but gentle with Angel. He'll try to ask you to give him lots of cherry tomatoes, but they give him gas. So no more than two or three." She added with a nod as Angel "harrumphed".
"Indeed, and naturally, you'll want me to keep the natural predators away from their natural prey? Do the bears ever get...handsy around the smaller animals?"
Fluttershy chuckled, waving a hoof in the air. "Oh, no. That's why I've got lots of cakes that Pinkie always makes for me when they need to satisfy their sweet tooth, and, of course, fish. It's a good thing they're not even remotely sentient."
"That's a surprise, I admit. I'll have to read up on your "Starswirl the Bearded's Guide to Magical Monsters and Amazing Animals of Equestria". I wonder if there's a reason why." The Huntsman admitted. "I wonder why only half of your world's animals seem sentient."
"I THINK it might have to do with how many of them live close to us ponies." Fluttershy offered as she patted Angel on the head, making him giggle slightly. "The animals that spend the most time with us ponies are the ones who pick up the most traits from us. At least, that's my gut. It's because we treat them as people that they become like people."
She walked out of the door, heading for the garden to speak to her little birdies whilst Angel dusted himself off and gave The Huntsman a look. "All right. Listen." He insisted, pointing accusingly at him. "I don't trust you much. But Fluttershy is trusting you. So don't you screw this up. Don't try anything. AT ALL."
"Well, if things get bad, I may need you and your friends help for this." The Huntsman admitted. "I've not eaten in over two weeks now, and I may need some additional assistance in restraining myself." He apologetically told the little rabbit.
"Which is why I bought magical rope." Angel said, slightly limping over to a cupboard and opening it up, revealing a golden lasso-esque pile of rope, smiling in a slightly mischievous fashion.
The Huntsman blinked in confusion. "Who would sell a rabbit magic rope?"
Angel cringed. "Er...well, you see, um..."
"At last." Discord remarked, the dragonequus cheerily holding up a rabbit's foot and putting it around his neck. "Finally! Now I can test if this thing actually works!" The goat-headed spirit of Discord cheerily intoned, rubbing it with his clawed paw.
Angel bit his lip, rubbing his paw over the well-disguised imitation of a leg he now had, deciding to just answer with "...I just know people."
The Huntsman gave him a cheery nod, heading into the kitchen as he hummed a bit to himself. He poured himself a drink to get his headache slightly cleared up, looking into the nearby circular mirror by the sink.
"Oh, who do you believe you are fooling? Really?"
The Huntsman stared at his skeptical reflection, which was giving him a look. "I mean, REALLY? Do you actually think you're going to be able to handle this!? Know your limitations! You haven't eaten in weeks. Your mind is going and your body is going to follow! Look at yourself! Take a good, honest look at yourself and tell yourself what you see!"
The alien hunter looked down at what was in his hand, blinking slightly.
"I see I've just drunken chicken broth from an old bottle of "Snapplejack"." He muttered.
"Exactly. You need to eat some meat."
"NO. I promised myself and the others not to touch an ounce of meat until the Princesses have provided me with a way to ease my unique condition!" Neh-Buh-Loh growled back. "I'm not going to eat anything or anyone that's even remotely-" He said, turning to look at Angel, who was looking him over.
And who'd evidently turned into a small steak with furry rabbit ears.
"What's going on?"
"...you may need to tie me up sooner than I thought." The Huntsman murmured.
Half a day later, Angel put on a small helmet over his head, adjusting it slightly as Gummy the Gumless Gator trotted over to him. Every single one of the beloved Elements of Harmony Bearer's pets had congregated at Fluttershy's house to discuss what to do with the Huntsman. And they were all quickly reaching a singular conclusion.
"I'm all for kindness, forgiveness. Giving second chances and believing the best in others. But when you've got giant horns, claws, taloned feet and you're ten feet tall at minimum, I'm gonna be uneasy around you!" Wyonna the dog remarked with a wave of her paw as Angel passed around cups of chocolate and regular milk. Opal, however, had insisted on tea. She ALWAYS insisted upon a nice cup of tea. She sipped from her cup with a certain air of Savoir-Faire before clearing her throat, the fluffy and elegantly-groomed cat nodding.
"Indeed, I could not help but notice when he was grooming me that his stomach was growling."
"How's Apple Bloom doing?" Spike inquired of Gummy as Gummy gave him a calm nod.
"Our esteemed young lass is currently keeping a close eye upon our Cosmo Sapien friend. He is currently biting into his arm and trying to restrain himself from putting dearest Howard in a fine white wine sauce. Which is difficult, considering Howard's thighs are especially juicy this week." The gator sighed apologetically, everyone nodding in agreement. It was true, their duck friend from the little pond in Fluttershy's backyard had not been dieting like he should have and he was, indeed, delicious.
"Though I have to admit. When he gave me my food this morning, I started to feel a mite creeped out!" Wynonna the dog sighed as she tugged a little at the red neckerchief she wore, shaking her head back and forth. The little white and brown dog looked at the others as they gazed back at her in return. "He didn't even drool over me! Answer honestly, guys. Does this neckerchief make me look fat?"
"No, you look adorable in it." Angel insisted with a shake of his head. "Maybe he's just not a dog person?"
"My dearest friends, I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer. But don't you believe he can hear us in the next room?" Tank the Turtle asked them all as he sagely bobbed his head, his little goggles slightly slipping down.
"No, Owlowiscious came up with an idea to give him a pair of headphones for this delightful new thing called "Audiobooks" ." Gummy informed them all. "Evidently it's a book which is read to you through the headphones and into your ears. It's like being read a bedtime story but by a machine. Is it not amazing what they come up with, these ponies?"
"So it's kind of similar to that Vinyl Scratch's music, but you can listen to it all by yourself? Maybe a little music would cheer us all up?" Spike asked of them all as they nodded, Angel hopping across the little carpet and onto the couch, moving his paw over to the radio and turning to a channel.
"-and so we once more welcome you to the Canterlot Classical Music channel, where the greatest in classical hits are played."
"Ahhh. Culture." Opal intoned cheerily, all of them nodding in agreement. Spike groaned.
"Ugh, this kind of stuff is always so BORING-"
"And first up on the hour, "The Gravedigger". By Schoofbert."
"BAAAAAAAWWWWW!" The cat sobbed, covering her face as Angel quickly switched the radio off, cringing. Maybe it was best he get the rope now, he decided.
And indeed, sure enough, the Huntsman had decided to get it over with. Sitting in Fluttershy's living room, everyone else stood outside of her little cozy home, Angel approaching the front door with his magical rope. It felt both so heavy and so light as he kept moving forward, Wynonna giving him a sympathetic look, Tank patting a sobbing Opal on the back whilst Gummy sagely nodded at the rabbit. Spike held out a clawed hand, cringing a little. "Listen. Should anything happen, we'll-"
"I know, Spike. Thank you." Angel said softly, the other animals Fluttershy took care of standing nearby, the bears quietly bowing their heads, the birds not chirping one iota. The squirrels were being horrible, pointing and sniggering, one of them going "Dead Bunny Walking" as Angel passed by. Filthy little longtailed RATS. Even his old enemy Monty the Reticulated Python gave him a quiet, firm nod.
"God...is your copilot." He expressed solemnly, Angel putting on the little helmet and entering the house, the others closing the door behind him as he approached the Huntsman with the rope. He held the shimmering golden length up, raising an eyebrow slightly.
"You're ready?"
"Go ahead. Make it tight." The Huntsman said. "And whatever I say, you must not release me." The alien informed Angel with a firm tone to his ethereal voice. Angel began tying the Huntsman's arms and legs together, keeping them behind the chair he was sitting at as a sign on the wall read "Meat is Evil' in big scribbled letters. Angel cringed as he looked his "hostage" over, he could read the tension in the Huntsman's limbs, a tiny little twitch popping up every ten or fifteen seconds from the starry-bodied being.
"How many hours since you last had meat?"
The Huntsman looked up at the grandfather clock in the living room as it rang out the hour of three in the afternoon. "About four hundred and thirty two. But I still feel in complete control." The blue-eyed alien muttered, nodding his head. "Mind over matter. I think I'll be fine. I can do this."
Angel stepped back, arms crossed, waiting a few minutes. Nothing. He looked at the clock as it ticked down the minutes, shrugging as he made his way over to the bookshelf, humming a little as he nestled on the cushions, deciding to take a little nap. But just as his eyelids began to droop...
The clock rang out. Four in the afternoon. Four hundred and thirty three hours without any type of meat.
"Give me a steak or I'll make you into a stew." The Huntsman grunted out.
Uhoh. Angel nervously rose up from the couch, the Huntsman's form beginning to slightly shake, some sweat dribbling down his brow. "Angel? Angel, all fun aside, please untie me now!"
"I, um, don't think I should." Angel murmured as he inched away, heading for the hallway and the bathroom which he knew he could lock.
"Untie me and let me have something to eat! I'm serious, Angel! I need some meat! A steak! A roast! Leg of lamb!" The alien growled out, his tone becoming more feral, an air of cruelty rising in him. "ANGEL!? I need meat, Angel! I need to eat something! I need to eat SOMEONE! My-my head feels funny! My...my feet are turning into puddles!"
"Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!" Angel whispered, inching closer to the hallway, feeling sweat beads break out on his own brow. "I'm off into the abyss now, aren't I? And it's staring back hungrily."
"You've! NO! IDEA!" The Huntsman roared, now bouncing the chair towards him. Yes, he couldn't break free of the rope, but Angel was going to let the alien hunter get within ten feet of him the way he was now. The bunny squeaked in terror, racing for the bathroom and slamming the door shut, locking it as he began to push the nearby chair in the bathroom to the door.
"Neh-Buh-Loh, stop! I promised I wouldn't let you eat meat! ESPECIALLY not me! Now get a grip on yourself, take a deep breath, and calmly consider the virtues of self restraint." Angel proclaimed through the door.
"ARRRUUUUOOOOOOO!" The Huntsman howled out, banging his head against the door, his horns beginning to ram the thing down, making wood splinter and crack as Angel "eeped" and raced for the one place he was sure the Huntsman wouldn't look, cringing as he did so.
"And to think I used to believe the cliche of "Hiding in a bathroom to escape a killer" never happened in real life." Angel thought inwardly. "I'm never reading another horror novel again!"
Meanwhile, outside, Philomena the Phoenix had touched down outside of Fluttershy's little home, and was now sitting on a tree branch next to Owlowiscious, looking confusedly at the owl. "Why are you all staring at the hut and hiding behind trees?" She asked of her friend. The two often snuck off together during weekends to relax and talk to each other about issues of the day. It wasn't too difficult for Philomena, she could fly at speeds of Mach 2, after all, and was happy to come visit the owl in Ponyville.
"Well, our alien guest from beyond the stars is currently trying to go as cold turkey as he can from meat, and Angel's tied him up with magic rope to make sure he can't cheat on that diet."
"He's keeping an eye on him inside?" Philomena inquired skeptically, tilting her head at him with confusion. "That seems unwise. Has he not implored my dear Princesses to find a way to abate his mighty hunger without feasting on the innocent?"
"Yes, and they've had no luck for weeks."
"I am certain sure Mr. Neh-Buh-Loh is a very civil person normally, but any true predator being without meat for so long will turn them into a maniac!" The phoenix remarked.
"Well, Philly my dear, that's why WE'RE out HERE." Owlowiscious intoned as he sighed before a very loud roar bellowed out from the bathroom.
"WHERE ARE YOU HIDING?!"
"He's in the toilet, isn't he?" Tank sighed. "The Ty-D-Bowl's gonna irritate his buttocks."
"Tank! SHHH! He'll hear you!" Opal whispered out as she poked her head out from behind a bush, putting a furry paw digit to her lips.
"Aw, c'mon. He can't hear us all the way out here."
And then came a very unmistakable sound that echoed through the air, followed by an unforgettable shrieking that indicated a bunny was spinning around and around in a toilet bowl.
"Looks like it's Checkmate for the Huntsman." Gummy cringed.
"Nah. I reckon that's more of a royal flush." Wynonna intoned before her eyes went wide. "Look! Look! He's got him by the window!"
Indeed. The Huntsman now had scared Angel out of the toilet and had him up to the window, Angel banging on the pane as the Huntsman lunged at him. Angel leapt up just in time, the Huntsman's head popping out the window as Angel raced over his back and back inside the hallway, the alien hunter growling and shifting about. He tugged slightly before his head shot back in and the loud THUMPA-THUMPA sounds of a giant alien hopping about while tied to a chair echoed through the air.
"We may need to get some help." Owlowiscious intoned. "Apple Bloom and Scootaloo are at the farm and taking care of the last of the family's animals there, let's bring them here so-"
"WHAT? Look, let's be honest. He's not going to be satisfied until he eats some meat. So we've got to have one of us make the ultimate sacrifice before he thinks to go into town and gobbles up some poor little filly like them." Wynonna said with a firm nod of her head. "We can't have them down here! They aren't good enough to keep him at bay! There ain't no way around it. We've gotta let him eat me."
"Eat you?" Gummy asked.
"Yes. Eat me."
"Yes, I don't think so." Owlowiscious said with a slight snort. "Look at your skinny little legs. You'd barely be a mouthful."
"You don't gotta eat the leg! I've still got plenty of good meat. Look at this behind. You ever seen such a fine behind?" Wynonna inquired, shaking her rear back and forth in the air as several of the animals nodded in agreement.
"Well, it isn't just the leg, ma'am." Monty admitted with a sigh. "It's, er...well, I'd rather eat Owlowiscious, honestly."
"Truth be told, so would I." Tank admitted, everyone giving him a surprised look. "What? I get dreams about this kind of thing sometimes. It's just a kink I have."
"Well, I suppose it's settled. Everyone's going to eat me!" Owlowiscious laughed wryly.
"Oh come now. You're good, but why should we have to let the Huntsman choke on your feathers or your beak?" Gummy asked politely, before pointing at Opal. "Let's eat fatty over here!"
"WHAT?!" Opal proclaimed.
"Think about it. I'll bet you taste like chicken." Gummy reasoned. "And you're just big and soft and squishy! You're perfect! A little mood lighting, a fine merlot, maybe baked for ten minutes and rotated slightly in the oven in a fine garlic butter sauce-"
"Look, I'll tell you what. We'll take some of Wynonna's rear flank, then he can have one of my wings and maybe a wing from Owlowiscious, and then Opal breast meat for supper!" Philomena reasoned, everyone looking around and nodding in agreement before Angel burst out the door, panting and heaving, brushing some sweat from off his brow.
"Phew...phew...that was close."
"Ah! Angel, come on, we need to get you out of there before he tries something!" Gummy proclaimed, Angel holding up a paw in the air.
"Not to worry. Not to worry. It's over. He's...safely neutralized inside the house. I found...a substitute." Angel gasped out, wiping his brow. "A suitable antidote for meat withdrawal was in the pantry this whole time. Thank goodness!"
Owlowiscious blinked. "Well, what is it?"
Bloated and gorged, the former meat addict was removed without difficulty from the now-empty pantry. Fears of a spontaneous explosion were allayed by Twilight, who assured everyone that he, and everyone else, would be just fine.
Neh-Buh-Loh was put to bed without incident and slept for three days straight, having eaten forty cakes that Pinkie Pie had baked especially for Fluttershy and each of her animal friends.
