> Ostrich > by sunnypack > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > 1 - That's O-Stretch > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 1: That’s O-Stretch It was staring at her. One foot raised, head cocked, wings half-raised. Don’t make any sudden moves. Don’t make any sudden moves. Don’t make— She felt it as a twitch. It increased in frequency eventually becoming an irritating buzz that vibrated along her muzzle. Pinkie focused on happy smiles, laughter and anything, anything but the building sneeze. The ostrich seemed to sense the change in atmosphere it leaned in, its head rapidly closing the distance with a sweep. Penetrating eyes regarded the struggling pony as she tried desperately to keep in that which wanted to make a potentially fatal announcement to the world. “Ah… Ah…!” A hoof gently clamped down on her muzzle. “If you move now, it’s going to get us,” Twilight whispered in her ear. Pinkie eyes twitched momentarily to Twilight, then they focused back on the ostrich. They were starting to water, but she nodded silently. “Pinkie,” Twilight muttered, Pinkie suppressed the urge to giggle inanely at the ticklish sensation playing in her inner ear. The hoof clamped down tighter. “After this,” Twilight continued, “you owe me an explanation.” ————— “Hiya Dashie!” “Ahh!” Pinkie’s wide grin turned sheepish as she observed the pegasus tumbling off her cloud to crash into several branches above the tree she was napping over. Rainbow shook herself, picking herself up off the ground and glaring at Pinkie. “How many times have I told you not to do that?!” Rainbow growled. Pinkie pursed her lips, seriously mulling over the question. “Probably like five or six times. Anyway, I need your help Dashie!” Rainbow Dash looked like she wanted to mutter some choice words, but evidently thought the better of it, opting instead to study her pink friend suspiciously. “What help?” Rainbow asked, knowing that in moments she was going to regret the decision. “I need ya to help me catch an ostrich!” Despite herself, Rainbow found herself curious. “Why do you need an ostrich?” she asked, unable to stop the question from blurting out. “For… you know—” she glanced at the sky “—oh wait, no time to explain, follow me!” ————— The ostrich crashed through the window to land on the table of a very surprised alicorn. Twilight, who’d been eating pancakes and reading the newspaper at the time, watched as the flightless bird sailed through the air ungracefully. It crashed onto the table, pulling with it a tablecloth and the entirety of her meal to the ground. Spike, who just turned off the stove, stood there mute as his hard work turned to mush on the opposing wall of the castle, splattered Pollock-style on the hardened crystals. She peered at the remains. That’s funny, she didn’t remember having cakes and confetti. Then again she had come to expect these sort of nuances in Ponyville. She could deal with flying ostriches. What Twilight didn’t expect, was a pony sailing straight after it. “Weeeeee! Aww, I thought that was going to last looooongeeeeerr! Woah!” Pinkie broke the last few shards of the window as she flew through. Her landing was spoiled by the butter smeared on the smooth table and she slipped across it to crash awkwardly in the mass of tableware, breakfast edibles and surprisingly, a few feathers from a swan. “Pinkie?! What the heck is going on?!” Twilight exclaimed, she rushed forward in concern. Her annoyed expression melted away when she registered that Pinkie didn’t seem to be moving. Oh no, Twilight thought. No, no. No! The tablecloth shifted. An angry hiss sounded from the remains of an indulgent meal. From the ashes of a nicely fashioned tea set and the remains of a newspaper declaring a state of emergency in Vanhoover, a long neck protruded. A pair of beady eyes scanned the room and the bird let out an indignant honk before the beast kicked at an innocent teapot, smashing it against wall behind Twilight as she hurriedly ducked. It burst out of the room, exiting out at speed. Twilight blinked at the carnage that swept the area. It could not have been more than a hooful of seconds. Pinkie shot up, as if revived by the exeunt of the ostrich. “Twilight! Help me! We need the ostrich, it’s the key to everything!” ————— A knock on the door of her house startled Rainbow from her nap. The act of the door actually being knocked was unusual in itself because the house existed several hundred feet off the ground. With a bleary effort she shook herself and headed towards the door. “Who is it?” Rainbow called out in the intervening space as she approached. “Uhm, mail!” a hesitant voice called back.  Ah, Derpy. Better let her in, Rainbow thought. She opened the door with a flourish. “What can I do for ya, Derpy?” she greeted, stepping aside. “Want to come in?” Derpy hesitated her hoof instinctively rubbing her shoulder. She shook her head. Rainbow winced. Right, the hole. “Sorry, Rainbow, I got a lot to deliver today, maybe next time,” she replied while fumbling around her saddlebags. After a few moments she extracted a rather large package. She regained a bit of her pep when she found her mail. “Parcel for you! It’s a big one!” She drew out a clipboard. “Just sign here, please.” Rainbow quickly signed the forms and took the package in her hooves curiously. She wasn’t expecting a letter, but who knew? This sequence of events felt totally familiar. Shrugging, she waved at the grey pegasus. “Thanks Derpy!” she called out. “Okay, you’re welcome! Have a great day, Rainbow— hey are you okay?” Rainbow stared numbly at the writing. Oh, now she remembered. Not good. Not good at all. “No I-I mean y-yes,” she whispered. “T-There’s something I have to do.” With that, the door slammed shut and Derpy hovered for a moment, confused. With a shrug, she flew off. —————— “So you see, we really can’t give you a concession to make it. Those are the rules,” the clerk stated. He steepled his hooves and sat back in his chair. “I’m sorry, there’s really nothing we could do about it. We’ve given you enough to last for the next decade never mind this year.” “Awww, pretty please?” Pinkie’s eyes went round and slightly watery. “I like you Pinkie, I really do. This is out of my hooves, you’re going to have to get special permission from a higher authority. If you want, I can lodge the appeal for you, but unfortunately that’s where my jurisdiction ends.” Pinkie deflated, lingered at the counter for a moment before trudging out. Just as she reached the door, a cough caused her to turn back. “Alright there’s one more thing I could do for you. Just don’t tell anypony okay?” he said reaching for a piece of parchment and scribbling something on it. “There’s a licensing issue on the south side of Ponyville, can you get it sorted? It’s at this address. If you can clear this for me, I’ll see what strings I can pull for you.” Pinkie grasped the scrap of parchment and hugged the surprised stallion. “Thank you so much! I’ll bake you a batch of cupcakes for you tomorrow.” Despite himself, the tired clerk smiled. “Alright you crazy mare, one more thing before you dash off. Make sure you get some help with that, its a bit of a hooful.” Pinkie nodded, clutching the note. Just have to this one thing and then she could get started! She looked at the address. Huh, didn’t expect that. —————— “See anything unusual? Big Mac did you see anything around here out of place?” Big Mac stopped heaving at the plough and unhooked himself. He shook his head. “Eenope,” he said, after a moment of thought. Applejack shrugged. “Sorry Rainbow, we haven’t seen anything. It might help if you tell me what it is.” Rainbow shook her head. “N-No! I mean no that’s fine, it’s not important,” she mumbled. “I have, uhm, something to do gotta-go-bye!” —————— “Hey isn’t there something around its neck?” Twilight whispered. Pinkie peered at the ostrich. Something was dangling from its neck. “Ooh I see it,” Pinkie whispered back. “What is it?” Twilight narrowed her eyes. “That’s the— what? How did that get here?!” —————— “Pinkie? Pinkie!” Rainbow called out. Her face was creased in an irritable frown. “Where did she go?” Rainbow’s eyes scanned the ground but she could see hide nor hair of that excitable pony. She caught herself in the middle of a yawn. Yesterday had been pretty exhausting, she’d caught herself reading until the moon made it halfway across the sky. Daring Do was so awesome. “Oh forget it, I’ll just go back home and take a nap,” Rainbow muttered, winging it to her house. —————— She swung the hammer, hearing the satisfying sound of the nail sinking into the wood echo around. Applebloom regarded her work with a critical eye, but she couldn’t see hairline cracks or splits in the wood. The fence was as good as new. Then she scanned the length of it. Wait, what was that? Aww, there was a nail missing! She must of dropped it somewhere. She considered looking for it, but quickly dismissed it. It could take ages to find the nail among all the grass. “Aww horseapples, now I have to go back to the barn and grab some more nails.” Plink. Applebloom looked up, spotting the nail on one of the fence posts. She gaped, did somepony find it? “Yes! Thanks—“ she began, then glanced back. Two black eyes studied her intently. The head bobbed from side to side, reminding Applebloom of a snake with its movements. It looked like a big, overgrown turkey. If a turkey was the size of two ponies. “Heh, nice birdy?” she muttered. ————— “I’m from the council, can you let me in?” “No!” “Ma’am, you can’t keep a pet in here without registering it first. Especially exotic ones.” “Ozzy is mine, you hear me? Mine!” “Miss…” The stallion trailed off and flicked through a couple of forms. “Miss Heartstrings, you can’t seriously be suggesting you keep the bird within the town perimeters. Listen, why don’t you come outside and we can have a nice chat about it? What do you say?” “You’re revoking my exotic license aren’t you? You can go back to the council and tell them to kiss my—” “Miss Heartstrings!” “—Licensing Forms!” Notable rubbed a weary hoof over his face. “Miss Heartstrings, you’re forcing me to go and get security. Are you sure you want that?” A period of silence followed his remarks. Notable felt a small spark of hope blossom. Maybe Miss Heartstrings would see reason? Maybe— Then the window shattered and a surprised flightless bird, suddenly found itself self-propelled through the air. Notable watched the bird fly through the air of its own volition, obviously enjoying the experience. With a gust of wind, it shot away, disappearing from view, indistinguishable as a speck in the sky. “That spell will last a few days, try and catch him now!” Notable groaned. He needed some help with this. ——————— “I didn’t know ostriches could fly,” the swan commented demurely as she sampled the refreshing water of the pond she bathed in. “I didn’t know either. My buddy’s really awesome,” the bird replied, fluffing his feathers appropriately. “She’s a unicorn.” “Oh? How’s that working out for you? I find it strange that they have such access to magic and power and yet they don’t bother talking to us.” “Oh it’s not that bad. I like listening. Sometimes, people need a buddy to speak to, a shoulder to cry on, some bird that’ll always be there for them.” He stopped himself from rambling. Wouldn’t do to let her know how they really met. Selena the swan turned half-lidded eyes in Ozzy’s direction. “You sound like a keeper,” she murmured. “How about you come join me in this pond?” Ozzy bobbed his head. “Why I’d love to—” “There you are! Where have you been?! I’ve been looking all over for you. Don’t you know how important to me you are?!” A rainbow-maned pegasus alighted next to Ozzy as he reared his head back in shock. “Why I— I should have known you’d be taken already!” “Hey wait—” But Selena had already taken off, leaving only a couple of feathers in her wake. Ozzy picked up the feathers delicately, storing them under a wing. He’d have to be shot out of cannon to lose these feathers. He turned to Rainbow, seething in rage. “Nice birdy,” Rainbow spoke in a low voice. “I just want that thing around your neck…” Ozzy glanced down at the shiny red gem. If she wanted this, she wasn’t having it! With a strong beat of his wings, he took off, leaving a surprised pegasus in his wake. Rainbow glared at the retreating figure. “Oh so that’s how you want to play it, huh? Well let’s see if you can out fly the fastest pegasus in Equestria!” ————— “Hey Twilight, do you know where you keep, like, dangerous stuff?” “Mm?” “Twilight, are you even listening? This is super important.” Twilight looked up from her manuscript with a frown. She really needed to submit the thesis by the end of the month, or there could be late penalties. True, there was still a month, but she could conceivably be late if she delayed a few minutes now. What if she needed them later? Twilight consciously stopped her panicked thoughts with an effort. Silly, there’s time, still time, you can talk to your friends. Then she registered what Rainbow had been talking about. She set her notes off to the side. “Oh sorry Rainbow,” she said, rubbing her eyes. “What did you want to know?” “Do you know where you keep your dangerous stuff?” Twilight narrowed her eyes. How did she know about her thesis? “Why do you want to know?” she asked suspiciously. Rainbow scuffed a hoof and looked away. “Uhm, I was kind of curious and I wanted to find out. I thought you could help me.” Those were the last words she was expecting to hear from her friend. A mysterious sensation crept up on Twilight. It began in her hooves and flowed up through her legs, collected in her chest until it felt like it wanted to explode, then gushed its way out of her mouth. “You want to learn about something… so you wanted to learn about my research?!” Twilight exclaimed with a squeal and clap of her hooves. Rainbow chuckled nervously. “Uhm, I suppose so,” she said. She looked a little uncomfortable. Twilight registered the emotion, but swept it away with her enthusiasm. Rainbow wanted to do some research! It must of been hard to approach her. Twilight gathered her manuscript and stuffed it into the drawer. She trotted out the room. With a jerk, Rainbow followed her. “Ah, hey where are we going?” Her voice already carried a note of regret. Twilight grinned a mile wide. “Where research always gets done. We’ve got to hit the library!” —————— Ozzy let out a surprised gargle, seeing the pegasus rapidly catch up to him. The flying spell was fast, but the rainbow-streaked mare was practically a force of nature. His eyes scanned the ground beneath him. There! He craned his neck back. Risky, but it was the only option. He dove down. ————— “Letter for you, Rainbow!” Letter? Was I expecting anything this week? she thought. Rainbow swung open the door. Derpy blinked back at her. “Do you want to come in?” Rainbow asked. Derpy hesitated, then nodded happily. “Thanks, Rainbow Dash. That’s nice of you. Woah—“ “Do you want some tea? Oh, wait careful, there’s a hole in the—“ Rainbow trotted over to the hole in her floor. She should really get that fixed. A bunch of letters fluttered down, one of them landing near her hoof. Huh, it was addressed to her. Curious, she opened the envelope and read the contents. To my number one fan, Usually, I wouldn’t write a letter to my fans. There are just way too many and I’m often caught up with something to respond. This time though, I’m in a bit of a pickle. My publisher’s been riding me for a new release but I just can’t get a concept around in my head. I need something to help my plot along, but like all my novels it has to be real, it has to be of ancient origin and it has to be evil. I figured that since you guys are some sort of minor heroes you might have encountered one or two sleeping demonic artefacts. I sent you this letter because I don’t know where else to turn. There are only so many ancient tombs I can raid. Regards, A.K. Yearling “Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh! Daring Do needs my help! Yes!” Rainbow did a couple of celebratory laps around his house, pumping her hoof the whole way. “Yes, yes, yes! All I need to do is find an ancient evil thing.” Her excitement died as her brows knitted together. “What the heck fits that description? Everything that’s ancient and evil has already been banished by us!” She flopped onto the clouds. “Who would know about ancient evil things.” “Did you not hear? The Great and Humble Trixie has made amends with your Princess and your town! No wait! Please, I have some real tricks now! Just watch— how did a pegasus get into my caravan?!” Rainbow winced, but then grinned deviously. “The Alicorn Amulet… but where would Twi’ put it?” ———— “Pinkie, darling, please tell me that’s not coming into my store.” Rarity eyed the shiny exterior of the barrel-shaped ballistics equipment. Pinkie tapped the cannon with a loving hoof. “Oh it’s not for you, silly! It’s for Lyra!” “Lyra?” “Yep! I’m throwing a ‘Please return the ostrich to the city council because you don’t have the proper licensing regulatory papers or licenses to hold an exotic animal within town limits party!’,” she explained. Rarity blinked. “Oh, well of course,” she said, recovering smoothly. One did not stay in Ponyville and not get used to Pinkie’s antics. Rarity watched as Pinkie’s ear flip-flopped, her eye fluttered, then her knee twitched. Rarity cringed, then again there’s always Pinkie. “A rainbow?!” Pinkie exclaimed, then looked up. Rarity glanced up, curious, then spotted the pulse of light and colour exploding outwards. Pinkie cocked her head. “Huh, my tail’s twitching as well.” Then a large flightless bird plopped into her cannon. BOOM! Overhead, the string of curses from a similarly colourful pegasus was lost in the sonic aftershocks. “Was that an ostrich?” Rarity whispered, she glanced over to see Pinkie climbing into her own cannon. “What are you doing?” “I have to go after that ostrich!” Pinkie shouted, slapping on a pair of aviation goggles. BOOM! Rarity shook her head, those goggles were so garish. ————— “Lyra!” “Go away, you’re not getting— oh Pinkie.” The angry tirade died, as the yellow eye registered her. “You’re not with anypony are you?” Pinkie glanced around as if a pony would magically appear next to her. What? It could happen! “Nope!” she cheered, sidling forward. “Caaaan I come in?” Lyra sighed. She looked beyond the pony to see two figures loitering outside her home. Her eyes widened spotting one of them. Her lips pursed. There’s no way she could refuse the pony now, not when she was so darn friendly. “Okay, Pinkie,” she muttered opening the door further. “Come on in.” Pinkie barged her way through, glancing around the room. On the walls were pictures of Lyra at various stages of her life. There were musical scores scattered around and various wrappings of candy as well. There were a few that looked like they haven’t been eaten. She picked one up, but was surprised to find that they were empty. “Sorry, Pinkie, I’ve eaten them all,” she explained, giggling at the scandalised look on Pinkie’s face. “So, what’s going on?” Lyra asked, bustling around the kitchen. “Uhm, Lyra, can you do me a favour…?” Pinkie began. She stopped when she saw Lyra’s features darken. “Did Notable send you here?” she demanded, trotting angrily to the counter to pour some tea. Pinkie shrugged and mumbled something under her breath. Lyra regarded Pinkie for a moment and then let out a sigh. “I thought so,” she muttered, then placed a mug in front of Pinkie. She gestured to the counter, indicating to a seat. When Pinkie took the opposite seat, she continued. “Pinkie, I’m taking care of these animals not because I want to—though Celestia knows they’re adorable—but because it’s a favour from my sister. She’s touring the world and sometimes she comes across an injured animal. I tried to get a license but they keep rejecting it.” Pinkie cocked her head. “But why?” Lyra had a wry grin on her muzzle. “Apparently you need it to be a part of your profession, or have some fancy certification.” She glanced to the side. Pinkie turned around and spotted a lyre mounted on the wall. “I don’t have time to get the certification. I just feed and water the animals whenever I can,” she said with a small smile. For once, Pinkie looked at the problem seriously. “If you’re so busy, why don’t you stop?” she asked. Lyra shrugged helplessly. “It’s for my sister. I would do anything for my family. Wouldn’t you?” ————— “And all the category five items are kept under strict security in the Canterlot Vaults. The heuristics in classifying each of the objects need to be characterised before they are stored. Usually they’re researched and documented quite thoroughly before they’re sent off to the Vaults…” Rainbow let Twilight mutter on. She was trying to find out where she could get her hooves on the Amulet but she’d never find it without Twilight’s help. Ironically, this was probably the hardest part of the mission, listening to Twilight while she gave a lecture. This was going nowhere… wait, did she just say Alicorn Amulet? “Hold a sec, Twi’, can you run that by me again?” Twilight cocked her head. “As I was saying, my thesis is on the Alicorn Amulet. I’m responsible for classifying the artefact and characterising its properties. So I’m keeping it in the castle in the meantime.” She pointed a hoof over Rainbow’s shoulder. “In fact I’m keeping it here in the library. It’ll stay here in storage for a few months, just for me to double check, but really I don’t need to use it as I’ve already gotten all the data on it.” Rainbow glanced back behind her and was surprised to see the Amulet just sitting there on a pedestal. The ruby light winked at her, seemingly beckoning her to come closer. Rainbow bit her lip. It was so close, there for the taking. Maybe she could ask for it? Would Twilight give it to her? “Hey Twi’?” “—And the process was dubbed— huh? Oh, yes?” “I was just wondering… with these things, could you like lend them out? To a friend or something?” Twilight burst out laughing. “Hah! That’s a silly question, Rainbow. Of course not. I’d never compromise my integrity for something silly like that… why?” “Oh,” Rainbow replied. She shook her head. Of course not. Twilight wouldn’t do that, even for a friend. For some reason she felt equal parts frustrated and disappointed. No, she couldn’t expect her friend to bend the rules like that. But it wouldn’t hurt, just one time? Rainbow noticed that Twilight was waiting for an answer expectantly. She blinked. Better distract her. Rainbow carefully feigned disinterest. “Oh okay, do you have anything about stunt flying?” she asked with a yawn. “I think I’m full up on dangerous stuff that’s got nothing to do with flying.” “What?” “You know, when I said I wanted to learn about dangerous stuff, I just wanted to get some info on tricks and stuff.” The lie felt bitter. Twilight blinked at Rainbow and then flushed red with embarrassment. “Oh you meant stunt flying? Oh I’m so sorry, I was just thinking about my own thesis this whole time! I’ll get those books for you right away!” As she flittered off, Rainbow felt a tiny prick in her heart. She just lied to her friend. She shook her head savagely. No, she needed the Amulet, it was to help Daring and she was a friend too. Rainbow glanced guiltily at the Amulet. She quickly snagged it off the stand and placed it in her saddlebag. She was just borrowing it, really. Twilight didn’t have to know, it’d be back soon. She said so herself, she didn’t need it anyway… Rainbow skittered out of the library and met Twilight angling back. “Sorry, they were in a separate area, I haven’t had the time to comb through all the new books. Here you go!” Twilight lowered her gaze guiltily. “I hope I haven’t talked off your ears with my rambling, I’ll stop now.” “Ah yeah, thanks Twi’,” Rainbow replied. Her sincerity sounded fake, even to herself. Twilight nodded at Rainbow. “Thanks Rainbow, you’re a good friend. You even sat through my whole thesis! Oh speaking of which, I have to get back to it!” She galloped down the hallway, calling back one last time. “I’ll make it up to you later!” Left alone with her thoughts, Rainbow couldn’t help but feel that she’d done something terrible. Hesitantly, Rainbow took a step, then another down the corridor. Her thoughts flashed back to Daring’s letter. “It’ll be quick, she doesn’t have to know,” Rainbow mumbled to herself. ————— Inside, Rainbow stared at the package with a healthy measure of trepidation. She tore off the recycled paper making up the wrapping and peered inside the box. Inside, was a signed copy of A.K. Yearling’s latest book: ‘Daring Do and the Alicorn Amulet’ and the amulet itself paired together with a worn envelope. She all but discarded the box and the envelope, throwing it across her room. Time to read the book later, right now she had to get the Amulet back before Twilight figured out it had been missing. She clutched the amulet to her chest and spread her wings. “Okay, I just have to—” It was then she remembered that there was hole in the floor of her house. She watched in horror as the signed copy slid across the floor and dangled precariously on the ragged edge of a hole… a few hundred feet from the ground. She dove after it, hooves outstretched. The box tilted then dropped, mere inches from Rainbow’s grasp. “Ah ponyfeathers,” Rainbow swore, and dove after the parcel. ————— “Just… make sure he goes to a good place. I don’t want Ozzy to go somewhere where they’ll treat him horribly.” “Wait, if you’ve been taking care of all your sister’s pets, where do they all go when they’re healthy? Does your sister take them back?” Lyra blinked at Pinkie. “No,” she said slowly. “They make a new home nearby.” Pinkie cocked her head. “Nearby?” she asked, suddenly feeling the impulse to know the answer. “In the Everfree forest, of course.” ————— Moments later a frazzled alicorn burst out of her castle and was tackled before she could put a hoof down. “Twilight, you should stay inside, there’s something I need to do. Don’t worry I have it covered, just stay inside, alright?” Then the pegasus blitzed off, leaving Twilight half-buried in the dirt and trying unsuccessfully to decipher Rainbow’s rapid-fire speech. She shook her head, trying to get the fine dirt out of her mane. “Sometimes, I have no idea what’s going on in this town.” ————— “That’s the Alicorn Amulet! How the hay did it get on that ostrich?” Pinkie gasped. “You know what that thing is?” Twilight glanced at Pinkie. “Of course,” she said. “Isn’t it obvious?” Pinkie looked back and forth between Twilight and the ostrich. “I thought it looked like some kind of dirty overgrown swan.” “What?” Pinkie shrugged. “Hey I don’t come up with these lines, they just pop into my head,” she explained with a shrug. Twilight muttered something under her breath. “Anyway, we have to get the Amulet back,” Twilight continued, peering through the bushes. The ostrich had lost interest in the rustling bushes and was trying to do something strange with its neck. It was pecking at something in the dirt. “Stop right there, don’t move!” Twilight froze, a hoof extended out. Then she realised that it hadn’t been directed at her, but instead at the ostrich. Huh? Rainbow? What was she doing here? “Ooh, I told Rainbow to help me find the ostrich, but I lost her on the way back. Maybe she’s got a plan? Go Dashie! Wait! Gotta be quiet,” Pinkie babbled. She mimed zipping her lips and locking it, throwing away the key. Twilight sank back into the bushes. Better wait until Rainbow had a go. Good old Rainbow, she’s always got their backs— “Give me back that Amulet!” Rainbow yelled. “I need to put it back before Twilight finds out it’s gone!” “WHAT?!” ————— It has to be a strange confluence of events that ties three stories together so neatly. Ozzy the ostrich was minding his own business when a pegasus flew out of nowhere and crashed into him. He looked at the strange creature and tried to determine what sort of demented bird would fly like that. On closer inspection it looked like a horse, but horses couldn’t fly. He’d never seen a horse fly. The Saddle Arabians usually kept to themselves, but they were very polite. Oh my, he thought to himself as he approached it. This little horse has wings! The ostrich tipped his head so that it was level with the fallen winged horse’s. “Are you alright?” he asked. To his surprise, the animal didn’t answer back. “Oooh. I hit an animal,” the equine muttered as she got to her hooves. At least Ozzy thought it was a she, it sounded like one. You never know with different species. “Yes, and you’re an animal too. Let’s all agree we’re both animals,” Ozzy replied. The pegasus continued to ignore him. “Ugh, lost in a desert, wing cramp mid-flight and I lost my treasure!” She threw her brimmed hat down onto the sand. Ozzy cocked his head and picked it up, handing it back. The equine evidently must have never gotten a gift in her life because she was surprised. “Thanks,” she said, putting her hat back on. She sighed. “So much for Daring Do and the Curse of the Sphinx.” She glanced sideways at the ostrich, the look gave him the shivers. “Say,” the pegasus drawled. “Would you mind terribly if I rode on your back?” Ozzy considered the statement for a moment and then shrugged with his wings. At least she was polite enough about it. He approached the pegasus side-on. Get on, he thought. Can’t be too bad. ————— Rainbow whipped her head around and spotted the purple and pink pair partially poking out of the primrose patch. She registered a surprised Pinkie and a seething Twilight. “Uhh, I can explain.” Twilight’s horn glowed dangerously. “Rainbow! How irresponsible can you be! I trusted you! Why did you do that to me? I told you how dangerous the Amulet was! I thought, ‘for once Rainbow’s listening to me’, but you didn’t. You went and stole the Amulet from me!” Rainbow flinched. “I-I had a reason—“ Twilight was hearing none of it. She rounded of Rainbow, stalking towards her, fury glinted in her eyes. “I’m disappointed in you, Rainbow. You didn’t even bother to ask.” “Actually I tri—“ Twilight ignored her. “But no, you went and took it. I thought the freaking ostrich had taken it. I never expected it to be one of my friends. I thought you were my friend!” Tears welled, lips quivered. “I-I—“ the words died in her throat. Her eyes shifted between the Amulet and Twilight. Then she took off, accelerating faster than either thought was possible. “Get back here Rainbow Dash!” Twilight yelled. “I wasn’t finished!” When the speck receded rather than returned, Twilight added, “You can’t fly forever!” She whipped around and pointed a hoof at the flightless bird. “And don’t even think about it, buster. Let me tell you, my magic is pretty freaking potent and I’m not in the mood right now!” The ostrich froze mid-creep. Twilight stomped over to the ostrich, ripping off the Amulet with her hooves. She could have done it with her magic but using her hooves right now felt so good. That and emotionally casting a spell with the kind of power she had at her disposal could either levitate the Amulet or level nearest mountain ranges. She studied the piece of jewellery. Abruptly, she snapped it in half. Pinkie gasped. “Wasn’t that, like, super important?” “It’s fake,” Twilight grunted, glaring at the sky as if doing so would magically summon Rainbow. Some of her anger died. “But that doesn’t explain…” Her expression darkened. “I still need to talk to her.” Pinkie glanced down. “Oooh! A letter!” she exclaimed. Twilight scrabbled forward, snatching the letter telekinetically from Pinkie and efficiently stripping the envelope encasing it. They both peered in, one curious, the other, furious. To my enthusiastic fan, I’d like to thank you for letting me borrow the Alicorn Amulet.— “I knew it!” Twilight growled. —It’s really helped inspire me to write, even though I wasn’t able to go on an adventure this time. Let me tell you, I’ve been really struggling to write recently and as much as it pains me to admit it. I’m glad you were there to help. Here’s a sample of the merchandise we’re going to ship out and a signed copy of the latest book. I’ll need to hold onto the original Amulet for a while until we get it properly dimensioned for modelling. I’ll get it back to you as soon as I can. I don’t know how many strings you pulled to get this done, but I’m grateful. Regards, A.K. Yearling “Rainbow’s penpals with A.K. Yearling?” Twilight spluttered. “Seems like Rainbow just wanted to help,” Pinkie said. “And what, she still didn’t ask me?!” Twilight snapped. She saw Pinkie cringing and made a visible effort to  calm down. “Sorry, sorry,” Twilight said. “But still, she should have said something.” “Maybe she did?” Pinkie replied. Twilight didn’t answer, she wasn’t in the mood. ————— A.K. Yearling, A.K.A Daring Do, limped in Las Pegasus station carrying on her back a tired and exhausted ostrich. Each had their fair share of cuts and bruises, but the ostrich seemed worse for wear. “Don’t worry, buddy,” Daring hissed through gritted teeth. “I’ll get you fixed up, I have an amazing editor.” ————— “I don’t know, Darling, this is a difficult order.” “Please, Rarity, I don’t know who else to turn to.” “Oh I can’t refuse a plea like that. Very well, I’ll get started, but don’t expect miracles, Twilight.” “Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!” “Don’t mention it dear. Tea?” ————— “Dr. Heartstrings, do you have a moment?” The unicorn looked up from the textbook. She glanced at the clock, realised it was lunch and she had skipped breakfast, then reluctantly tore herself away from the alluring tome. “Yep? How can I help?” she asked, swinging back in her chair. The mare entered the room, her gaze sweeping over the tattered notes and illegible writing. She had a clean-cut appearance and a severe expression that brooked no frivolities. At least Biscuit could see that the visitor wasn’t some company representative or the likes, trying to get her clinic to support some drug. “My name is Berne Book. I’m the chief editor for Hachette, the publisher best known for publishing the Daring Do series.” Berne got straight to the point. “We’ve noticed your growing influence in the community. Among the private circles, you’re one of the best editors. It took us a while to track you down, but we want you. We’d like to offer you a job.” Berne inspected her hoof idly, as if assured of her answer. “What makes you think I want to edit for a writing company?” Biscuit shot back. “You’re in love with another world outside your own, aren’t you?” Biscuit didn’t reply. It would be incriminating. Berne smiled knowingly. She leaned against a stainless steel plated table. “How would you like to meet the characters in the stories you edit?” Biscuit looked back at her textbook. With a click, a business card materialised on her desk. “Call me when you decide you want a change.” ————— Knock. Knock. “Coming,” the voice inside groaned. The door opened and a mare with a frizzled white and green mane peeked. “You know what time it is?” The pegasus shrugged sheepishly, heaving at the manticore draped across her shoulder. “I need your help,” she whispered. “One day, Miss Do, we’re going to have to talk about job descriptions,” Biscuit replied wryly, letting her in. ————— “Twilight, get on the ostrich.” “No.” “Come oooon, it’ll be fun!” “No.” “Aww spoilsport!” Twilight sighed. “Fine,” she grumbled and trotted over to the side of the ostrich. Pinkie hopped off. Twilight narrowed her eyes. “How do I get on it?” she mumbled, looking for a way to get on the large bird. Pinkie shrugged. “You just get on.” She hopped on. “And you get off.” She hopped off. “On.” “Off” “On.” “Off.” “On—” “Okay, okay,” Twilight said quickly, watching the ostrich frowning. How did it even do that? The beak was inflexible wasn’t it? Better not annoy the animal that was almost double their size. “Off,” Pinkie finished, doing cartwheel off the ostrich. Twilight was having second thoughts about mounting the imposing bird. “I think I’ll pass on riding the ostrich…” she mumbled. “Aww… Come on, it’s really fun!” ————— Rainbow pounded her hoof on the wooden door of the simple cabin. She was exhausted and sweat soaked her mane, matting it to her body like a soggy tissue. “Miss Yearling! Miss Do!” she yelled desperately. There was no answer. Rainbow peered into a window, trying to find a clue as to the whereabouts of the prominent author. “Miss… Do?” Something caught her eye, it was lying on the front deck. “Gone out to Vanhoover to see the vet again, leave me a message if you’re from the company,” Rainbow read out loud. Wait, vet? Did Daring have a pet? Never mind she’d have to get to Vanhoover somehow. Her wings ached. Another long distance flight. “Vanhoover… how many vets could there be in Vanhoover?” ————— “Ugh! Is Rainbow still in Ponyville? I can’t find her anywhere!” Twilight stomped towards the castle. “Don’t you have some sort of magical way of finding Rainbow?” Pinkie asked, still riding the ostrich. The poor bird seemed to have given up on resisting the antics of Pinkie. Better it learn sooner than later, anyway. “I did, but I removed the tracking spells a long time ago,” Twilight muttered with a sigh. “Well that’s mildly disturbing,” a sarcastic-laden voice called from behind Twilight. She whipped around and noted the misshapen face, the hoof and claw and the twisted disparate horns. “Discord.” There was a sigh. “I’m sorry I don’t have time to deal with you now, Rainbow knows where the Alicorn Amulet is and I need to get it back.” “Oh that’s fine. I was just about to tell you where she went, but I suppose you have no time for the reformed Spirit of Chaos.” Twilight took a deep breath. “Okay, what do you have, Discord?” “Hmm, well you’re not getting the information out of me for free,” he commented, examining one of his claws. Twilight resisted the urge to groan. “Okay, what do I have to do?” she muttered impatiently. Discord drifted over the pair and laid a claw on the ostrich. “Dear Fluttershy has been quite upset with the stress of new animals making a new home in the Everfree forest. Some of the regulars aren’t too happy with the exotic neighbours. Unbalancing the ecosystem or something like that. Anyway, find the pony who’s responsible and we can talk.” ————— “You know how I said I was in a kind of slump with writing?” Biscuit rolled her eyes at the tan-coloured pegasus. “You dragged in an ostrich and then declared that you never wanted to see sand for the rest of your life.” Yearling chuckled and took a seat opposite of the exasperated editor. “I still have sand in my ears. Anyway, now I have my little muse!” “What?” Biscuit looked at the ornate jewellery as it was withdrawn from one of Yearling’s saddlebags. “This is the Alicorn Amulet. It’s some ancient artefact that apparently grants power to the user.” Biscuit groaned. “You know I don’t mind you going on adventures and giving me a little excitement every now and then, but come on, bringing dangerous things into my clinic?” Yearling unashamedly waved it around. “Oh don’t be such a stick in the mud. It’s not even that bad, it’s not like it could cause the world to end like my last book.” Biscuit narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Just how much of your stories is fiction, anyway?” Yearling tapped a hoof to the side of her nose. “A secreeeet,” she spouted smugly. Biscuit shook her head and poured them some of the clinic’s coffee. Not the best stuff, but you do what you can to get through the day. She turned to see the pegasus staring at the Amulet intensely. “How does it work?” Yearling pursed her lips and tapped a hoof to her chin. “I have no idea. The letter didn’t say anything. I thought maybe you knew, since you were a unicorn,” Yearling said. Biscuit fought the urge to groan. “Just because I’m a unicorn doesn’t mean I know everything about magic. I’m a vet, not some student from Celestia’s School. Why don’t you try it on?” A.K. Yearling hesitated, then shrugged and clasped the amulet on. ————— Vanhoover doesn’t get much exposure in the way of news. It’s a quiet place, despite the size of the city. Its inhabitants are those who prefer city life, but like it slow. Still, life in Vanhoover can get awfully boring and there are rules to protect its citizens from having too much excitement. “There have been complains, Ms. Heartstrings.” “Doctor,” the veterinarian shot back frostily. She usually didn’t mind the dropping of her title, but this time she felt it was warranted. “I’m a Doctor.” “Yes… Doctor. I’m sure you are aware that keeping dangerous animals in your practice is against the law.” “I guess it depends on the definition of dangerous, Mayor.” The stallion tapped a hoof on the desk. “We’re going to have to ask you to remove them. You can’t keep them in here.” Mayor Mane sighed. “I know you think I’m doing this because I’m some bureaucratic suit, but really I’m just as concerned as some of the others. The local PTA has been pounding on my door ever since that basilisk and hydra broke out. Even if you don’t want to do it for me, can’t you do it for the foals?” Biscuit bit her lip. She loved her animals and they understood her, someponies just didn’t get their intentions. It’s not like the animals wanted to go on a rampage in the city. They were just scared. At that precise moment, the giggles of a couple of foals outside echoed through the clinic windows. Her guilty expression was enough to prompt Mayor Mane. “I know you’ll make the right decision,” he said softly, and rose from the table. “But where will they go?” Biscuit’s impassioned cry sang across the space. Mayor Mane smirked. “I’m sure there’s bound to be a mare as crazy as you somewhere in the world.” ————— “Dr. Heartstrings?” Biscuit looked up from the manuscript she was reviewing. She quickly marked the passage she was on and set it aside. “Yes?” “There’s a visitor outside the clinic.” “Consultation hours are over.” “Yes Doctor, but this pegasus seems really persistent.” Pegasus? Biscuit thought as she rolled back from her chair. Is it Yearling again with another injured animal? She’s got a heart of gold, but she needs to find a vet that’s not also her editor. Biscuit cantered to the door, opening it up and expecting to see her client. “Oh, uhm, I was expecting somepony else,” Biscuit mumbled. The rainbow-maned pegasus darted across the intervening space and placed a hoof in the door, blocking it from closing. Biscuit sighed. Another fan? How did they even get her address? “I really need to speak to Miss. Do. Like, right now,” she said. “No idea,” Biscuit growled and tried closing the door once more. Another hoof shot out to block the gap. “You’ve got the wrong pony.” ————— “How would we know who’s been putting all these dangerous animals in the Everfree?” Twilight muttered to herself. Beside her, an ostrich waddled with a pink pony wrapped around its neck. “I dunno Twilight! I have get this ostrich back to Lyra.” It finally occurred to Twilight to ask. “Pinkie, you knew where this ostrich came from?” Pinkie nodded exuberantly. “Yep!” she said, stroking the bird on the neck. “Notable told me that Lyra had set Ozzy free, so I was supposed to catch him!” Twilight frowned. “Doesn’t Notable work for the Mayor’s office? Shouldn’t you go back to the town centre?” She pointed a hoof behind them. “It’s that way.” Pinkie grinned. “But Lyra wouldn’t like that. You have to make everypony happy. We just have to talk! I’m sure it will work out.” “Talk…” she muttered, her thoughts drifted back to the argument. “Well I guess I should have listened to Rainbow… No! I was right. There wasn’t a recourse for that…” Twilight felt hooves wrap around her middle. “Wha— h-hey!” “Get on, silly!” Pinkie giggled, tossing the irritable alicorn onto the ostrich. Ozzy took the hit, rolled his eyes and kept going forward. ————— Daring Do heaved paid for two train tickets to Vanhoover. It was lucky she had managed to scrimp a few bits together, a couple less and she’d be trotting to Vanhoover all the way. Never mind flying, Ozzy would be too heavy. Ozzy was her pet name for the flightless bird. It was fitting to name him something special. There was a temple near the ruins that belonged to an ancient king named ‘Ozymandius’. After a couple of times Daring reverted to using Ozzy, partially because she got tired of saying his full name but mainly because she had been running out of water and her throat felt like the sands they walked upon. When she called him Ozzy, he seemed to like it, so she stuck with it. She should tell Biscuit, she always loved the names she gave her animals. ————— “We’re here!” “Where?” “Lyra’s house of course!” “Oh, you go on ahead?” “Don’t you wanna come with me?” “Uhh, I can’t.” “Why?” “I don’t know how to get off this ostrich.” “Oh. Don’t worry, I’ll be quick!” “Pinkie, wait—“ ————— “Huh, nothing happened. That’s unexpected.” “So you just casually put on random objects of power, just like that?” “You never know until you give it a go!” “You’re the craziest mare I’ve ever met.” “Some would say I’m simply adventurous.” “I’ll think I’ll stick with crazy.” “You know Biscuit, you should get out more. Go out and have your own adventure. Who knows? Maybe you’ll finally find the stallion you’re looking for or, you know, whatever you fancy.” Biscuit had been sipping coffee but it all came spluttering out, luckily most of the brew missing Ozzy, who’d wandered back into the kitchen, but Yearling caught a face full of it. “W-What?” “Tell you what, I think I’ll leave the Amulet here and see if you can figure anything about it… if you’re feeling adventurous enough of course.” Yearling had that infuriating smile that told her she knew she’d never do it. The writer left the clinic, sweeping away like a whirlwind of know-it-all smugness. “I’ll show her,” Biscuit grumbled as she downed the rest of her coffee. “I’ll just drop off Ozzy at my sister’s and I’ll figure out the Amulet. That’ll show her…” ————— “I really need to see her, it’s about this Amulet I’ve given to her. I really need it back.” “Amulet? Oh, the Alicorn Amulet?” “Huh? How’d you know about it?” Biscuit rubbed the back of her head in poorly concealed embarrassment. “Oh well after I put it on and went all crazy some guards came in, tried to suppress me, I destroyed half the town and then Yearling gave me a kick to the head. She told me I was hurting my own animals so I came to. I basically spent the last week trying to fix the town after that.” Rainbow groaned. “So where’s the Amulet now?” “I don’t know, the guards took it away. It’s probably in Canterlot by now.” ———— Rainbow alighted on the ground outside Twilight’s castle. Frankly, Twilight was one of the last ponies she wanted to see. She hovered in front of the door. Several times she retracted her hoof, held in preparation to knock several times. “How long are you going to stand there, Rainbow?” a clear voice cut across. Rainbow whipped around, but she knew who had spoken immediately. “Twilight,” she mumbled. “Listen, I’m sorry—“ “Actually, I don’t want to hear it.” “What? But—” “Now that I’ve had time to think about it, it wasn’t entirely your fault. I guess it was mine in keeping out in the open like that when anypony can come in and snatch it. Also… I should have listened more closely. I mean I still think you should have asked me, I might have said ‘yes’, you know? But you stole it anyways and I knew you were trying to help somepony out. Misguided, sure, but with good intentions. You’re loyal in that way. Perhaps too loyal, and I can’t fault you for your personality, Dash.” “Actually Twilight, about that… look I’m really sorry I took your model. I thought you might not need it.” Twilight nodded, accepting her— wait a minute, what did she say? ————— Every step she took was getting harder to take. This wasn’t who she was. She was Rainbow Dash! She didn’t betray her friends. “Hey Rainbow, what’s up? You look a little stressed.” Rainbow almost leapt out of her coat. “Oh hey Spike,” Rainbow greeted nervously. Sweat beaded at her forehead. “Oh hey Rainbow, you know if you’re going to steal the Amulet you shouldn’t let it stick out of the bag so much.” “Oh ponyfeathers!” Rainbow reached around to cover it up with her hooves, but Spike’s raised eyebrow was all the response she needed. “I can’t do it, I have to return it!” Rainbow exclaimed. She made to go back to the library, but Spike slid into her path, blocking her. “Rainbow, I think I may have a solution for you.” —————— “Lyra just wants them to go to a good place,” Pinkie explained as she came out of the house. Twilight nodded absently. “Pinkie,” she said suddenly. “Do you think I was wrong?” Pinkie shrugged. “Do you think you’re wrong?” she asked her. Twilight paused, then shook her head. “No, but I feel bad for some reason.” “Then I think you need to do something to make your bad feelings go away.” Twilight almost rolled her eyes at the simplistic response. Then she considered it. Maybe Pinkie was right, maybe she just needed to confront these feelings. Then maybe that sinking feeling in her stomach might go away. —————— Rainbow turned from the veterinarian practice. “Hey, just letting you know, that Amulet as a fake. It’s just a model.” Biscuit’s cheeks could not be more red. “I-I know, I just wanted a bit more excitement in my life. I so concerned about proving to my friend that I was an adventurous sort, I let my feelings get in the way of what was important to me.” —————— Spike lead a twitchy pegasus down the hallways of the castle. He gently pried the Alicorn Amulet from her hooves and placed it back on the library stand. Then he drew out something from one of the drawers and handed it to her. Rainbow blinked in confusion. “What’s that?” she asked. “It’s a model of the Alicorn Amulet. Twilight had it made by Rarity, it looks just the same as the original, minus the evilness thing.” Rainbow took the model into her hooves slowly, then she grasped the young dragon by the shoulders, crushing him in a forcible bear hug. Harry would be proud. “Thanks, Spike!” “Don’t mention it. I could use some breathing, that’d—“ *wheeze* “—be nice…” —————— Twilight’s ears flattened on her skull. She combined all her misunderstandings and assumptions all into one big lump of guilt. It sat in the pit of her stomach, making her nauseous. “Oh,” she said faintly. “That’s what happened.” The worst thing was, Rainbow was still apologising to her. She did take the model, but Spike gave it to her. They were in it together. But the crime paled into insignificance when compared to taking the real one, which apparently was still safe back at the castle. If she’d stopped and thought about all the discrepancies she might have gotten to the conclusion herself, without hurting her friend. I’m a bad friend. The thought roiled around in her mind, taunting her. Rainbow approached with halting steps. “Are you mad?” she asked. Twilight looked up and was surprised when the clear image of her world was eclipsed by blurry smudges of rainbow pastels. “Yes,” Twilight replied. “I’m mad. At myself.” She flinched as a hoof tenderly stroked her on the back. “Don’t be,” a rough but warm voice reassured. With that Twilight’s heart swelled and she knew all would be right with the world. —————— The click of hooves on the floor snapped Notable out of his daze of filling out his paperwork. He glanced up, expecting one of the many ponies running the town hall office, but when he spotted who walked in he almost dropped his quill in surprise. “Oh do relax, I’m not here to cause trouble,” the draconequus greeted pleasantly. Notable shook his head. “Mm, no response? Alright, I’ll do all the talking. I want you to let Lyra keep the animals here temporarily—“ he held up a claw to stem his inevitable protests “—now, now I know what you’re going to say so I decided out my the kindness of my magnanimous heart to spell the forest and Lyra’s house. There’s no way those animals will come out of the bounds. Fluttershy’s gone and talked to them too and they’ve been quite civil. I swear some of you ponies can create more chaos than I could, just by being so thick headed. I trust that solves all your problems?” Notable could only nod numbly. “Excellent, oh and you can thank Pinkie for letting me know. I’ve had a chat with Lyra, we’re on agreeable terms. I impressed upon her the art of communication. Well then, things to do, other ponies to annoy, tataa!” With a flash, the imposing Spirit of Chaos disappeared, leaving a flustered clerk sweating at his desk. With shaking hooves, he pulled out the next form in the pile, approving a town-wide party. ————— “Pinkie really knows how to throw a party,” Twilight commented, weaving through the crowd and approaching Rainbow. The pegasus grinned toothily at her neurotic friend. She may be neurotic, but she was her friend. “She can get a lot done in a day,” Rainbow replied wryly. They watched as Pinkie bounded from pony to pony chattering excitedly and making wild gesticulations. “She sure knows how to talk to ponies,” Twilight said, with a hint of… wistfulness? Rainbow patted her friend on the back. “You’re fine the way you are. Don’t ever change, Twilight.” Then she giggled and took off, joining a couple of pegasus that were challenging each other to a short race. Twilight watched her friend go, sipping at the cool beverage. Was it just her, or did the pineapple taste sweet? ————— Bang! Bang! Bang! “Ugh, only one pony in the world would be at this clinic at this hour,” Biscuit mumbled, stumbling out of her cot. She had an apartment of course, a real home, but she worked so often in the clinic that it was practically a second home to her. It was her practice after all. Bang! Bang! Bang! There were muffled exclamations from the other side. “Coming! Coming!” Biscuit grumbled, stumbling on some loose cables. “Hold on!” The clinic was pitch black but Biscuit knew instinctively where the light switch was. With a telekinetic flick, the lights came on. The indistinct shouting on the other side of the door resolved themselves as she approached. “Biscuit! Come on open up! I owe this guy!” Biscuit swung open the door laying eyes on exactly what she was expecting. “Oh come on Yearling every time you go!” Biscuit growled, stepping aside. A.K. Yearling bustled past, carefully placing the beaten up bird on the examination table and flopping herself down on one of the chaise lounges for the more normal visitors of the veterinary clinic. “You can help him, can’t you?” the pegasus pleaded. Her broad rimmed hat was askew and obfuscated her full facial expression, but Biscuit knew what was underneath that hat. “Oh alright,” she muttered. “I can’t refuse a beautiful beastie.” “Can you save the poor ostrich? I came across him in the desert and he helped carry me across the whole way.” Biscuit looked at the ostrich and back at Yearling. “That’s not an ostrich,” she said. Yearling looked confused. “What is it?” “He’s an emu.” “Oh.” What more could she say?