Derpy's Obsession With A Certain Type Of Bread.

by UnhingedBuZiness

First published

A friend talks about Derpy's weird obsession, and how it emotionally connected them.

One of Derpy's friends talk about how a muffin has impacted both of their lifes.:derpyderp1:

Muffin

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I've been friends with Derpy for over a year now and I've notice something...something odd. I didn't think much of it like my coworkers did, I didn't find it that abnormal as they did either. But she didn't mind either, she just acted as if it was normal, and so did I. But it's just a muffin, no harm in that...I think. All the hubba started on a Tuesday in the mail complexes mess hall, me and the usual guys I eat my lunch with, sat at the usual table that we ate at. We would always see her there in her same spot, about a couple tables to our left, and she will always bring one,single,big,tannish muffin. In our eyes, There was nothing special about those muffins that she adored so much, all we can see was a tannish muffin with brown and reddish specks on top.

The guys at the table would usually make fun of her and her muffin, I didn't partake in the funny making, but I did laugh at some of their remarks. Some of the guys would say "I wonder what Derpy is having today?"

And another would say "a muffin, what a surprise, if that mare keeps eating those constantly it'll go to her thighs." We would have a good laugh, but none of us would actually mean it. And sometimes she would hear our hysterical laughter, and she would frown and hang her head in sadness, she knew we were talking about her. So one day when one of the guys made a hilarious joke, we all had to laugh like stupid school fillies, and of course she heard but she didn't really care at this point. I told them to shut it, and to Stop with the remarks.

After lunch we had to get back to work, packaging,stamping,mailing,getting orders, and other things that needed done, fortunately some pony was taking over for my shift, and fortunately Derpys shift was taken over as well. So I decided to go over and talk to her about the incidents that happened in the mess hall, she first gave me a frown but then a cheerful smile when I approached. I told her that we all were deeply sorry for what we have said. She said it was ok and that it really didn't hurt her feelings, there was a couple of seconds of awkward silence, until I told her what's even so good about those muffins. She gave me a surprised look and said "you haven't had one before!? Try one silly!" so I took the muffin and took a bite, it was good, but not perfect enough to obsess over. She blushed and told me she made them herself, I told her that she was a great baker and told her we should hangout sometime, she immediately said "Sure! I do get kinda lonely at lunch, and I really don't have any pony to hangout with."

A ringing bell announces that the end of work has arrived, an announcer tells every pony to head home for the day

When I was heading home I couldn't help myself from eyeing the bakery near my house, so i helped myself to a muffin from Sugar Cube Corner. But for some reason it didnt taste the same as Derpys' muffins, I dont know why, they were both fresh out of the oven, and looked awfully a like, secret ingredient maybe. When I opened the door to my house i took in a deep breathe, then exhaled, I sat on the couch and just relaxed. I was bored, usually when im home I read,write,eat,sleep,and draw random things that have no meaning, Im not usually like this, I'm usually out and about. I was staring up with my mouth gaped open, looking at a stain on the ceiling ever wondering if i was going to clean it, not knowing what else to do. So to end my suffering of boredom, I went off to bed, I just laid there thinking about my day, and muffins, and also Derpy.

Before I even knew it I was at my job opening the doors to the entrace, just barely opening the doors I saw Swift , one of the guys. I told him about what I said to her when I had my freetime, and how I would like to get to know her by hanging around her. He gave me a half shocked half concerned look and said "this Derpy sounds like bad news, I don't know how but, I just don't feel right about her,"
he kinda shuffled away as if he was being watched. Swift was always one of the weird colts in school, even at an older age he still acts kinda paranoid about meeting new ponies.

I saw him walk over to the rest of the group to talk about what I said, they all reflected confused looks, Thunder Flash, the second founder of our group, walked over to me with a smirk on his face. He said "so your the last one to get a girl out of all of us huh? And its a weird one." He started to walk away to the West Wing till he turned around and said with a smirk "too funny" then he walked off.

I was in the South Wing packaging antique Discord lamps, when I finally noticed Derpy in front of me putting packages on a conveyor belt, she was so in depth with her work she hasn't even noticed me, I can even see a drop of sweat fall from her brow. I didn't want to interup her, so I went back to packaging the Discord lamps, our company had this routine slogan: place,close,seal, and slide to the left. The memo was embedded in my head while I worked, playing itself in my mind over and over again, the faster I worked the faster it played. But it wasn't like making me insane, it was giving me energy to get through the day, which it usually did. Then the conveyor stopped, meaning its 1:00,meaning its brake, meaning its lunch, meaning I get to eat. Derpy was still at her station eyeing her work, she wiped her forehead from sweat, then whipped her hair and fluttered her eyes sexually to nopony in particular.

I've never found Derpy very attractive, but she could be at times. She finally locked eyes on me, catching me looking at her with shock and awe, she cocked her head and said "are we going to sit her and starve, or go eat." She started to walk away whipping her tail motioning me to follow, we got at a table and sat down, I looked to the left and saw the fellas sitting far away at the farthest table. I knew they were here for the show, either me fucking up, or it running smoothly. There was nothing entertaining about this, and its not like were on a date or anything, just getting to know each other. Derpy put her head under the table a pulled out a brown bag and place it on the table, with a smile never leaving her face she opened it and pulled out a muffin.

That's when I realized that I've forgoten my lunch at home, but I wasn't that hungry, so it didn't matter as much. But Derpy was, she eyed the muffin with excitement and took a nibble, she groaned at the taste of it and preceded to devour it. It was only in a matter of seconds that the muffin was completely gone, she licked her lips and said "that was good! Aren't you going to eat?" The only words that came out were I'm fine, I was to busy looking her over, at her blonde mane, Gray coat, and her adorable eyes. She was finishing some of the crumbs off of her hoofs to even notice, she finally looked up and gave a smile. I shook myself out of my hypnotized state and smiled back, Derpy got up and said cheerfully "I'm gonna go throw this away."

She left with the bag to the trash, leaving me alone at the table that only Derpy used to occupy. I looked to the left and noticed that they moved a table closer, Swift looked at me with a grin and pointed a hoof at me and at Derpy, then with his horn he grabbed a carrot and a donut and made the carrot go in and out of the hole. They all started laughing, my group doesn't consist of the most mature ponies, we all act like colts, I just rolled my eyes and shook my head. I looked to my right and saw Derpy heading back, she sat back down with a soft thud, I asked her how much time did we have left. She looked at the clock on the wall and said "hmmm....about five minutes, hey, um I know we didn't do much, but thanks for being with me" she gave me a heart melting smile which I couldn't help but smile at. She blushed and said hesitantly "um...would you like to..uh..come to my house to, uh you know h-hangout?" I said it will be my pleasure, but I had a feeling she wanted the 'D', she said great, with great enthusiasm and flew to her next shift not shortly after the bell rang.

It was the end of a hard days work; i never saw Derpy after our last coversation. I didn't know a specific time to go to her house, so I just decided tomorrow, which was Saturday. As I did always I walked home eagerly, my body ached more than usual, I had an headache, and I can barely keep my eyes open. When I got home I immediately flopped onto the bed with a loud groan, I looked up at the ceiling a saw another stain. I frowned at the thought of another stain magically appearing, I positioned myself to the right, never minding the small problem. That's when i started thinking about Derpy again, I started realizing that I liked her, more then a friend. I thought about what will happen tomorrow, that's when I had a dream of it.

I didn't know if this was supposed to be a normal dream or a sexual one, but this is how it went. I was walking to Derpys house and stopped at the front door and saw Derpys head stick out from a couple of curtains near a window. She gave me a smile and let me in, when I entered I was shocked by two things. One: everything in the house had to deal with muffins, there was muffin everything, muffin casserole, muffin shakes, muffin pie, muffins, muffin wallpaper, muffin tiles, muffin marble counter top. Second: she wore some lingerie, she wore socks with muffins on them, then she had panties on which had a muffin print were her marehood would be. She was lying on a couch motioning me to come to her, then she pulled out a whip, I didn't have any control my body. I moved towards her and sat down on the couch, she then got on top of me with her fore hooves on my shoulders. That's all I remember before I woke up.

I sat up straight breathing heavily, as sweat dripped from my face onto the sheets. I looked around the room that was littered with darkness, trying to find the clock on one of the walls. It was was still midnight, 12:37, I layed back down onto the cold surface of my pillow. I layed there, motionless, confused, shocked, and speechless. I tried to comprehend what just happened in my dream, piecing the different events together. I've had dreams like this before, with other mares that caught my interest, but this one was a bit weirder. Due to that the whole entire dream was dedicated to muffins; I decided to just go back to sleep, awaiting the day In front of me.

The birds that usually sat on my window seal woke me up with their cheerful chirps. I opened my eyes and saw a beam of sunlight stretch across my room; a beautiful sight it was. I got up and headed towards the bathroom to check my self over. My hair was a bit messy, but I can just fix it by rubbing some water in it; my hair is very similar to the WonderBolts I just don't have to use gel. I took a shower,brushed my teeth,combed my hair, and did all that prepping stuff to get ready. When I was done I stood in front of the mirror again looking at my enhanced self, I decided to skip breakfast and just head on to Derpy's.

While walking to her house, I thought to myself if I should bring anything. I didn't know if it was a date or a friendly visit for a cup of tea, but a part of me wanted to buy her a rose, or mayby even a bouquet of flowers. Before I even knew it I was in front of RoseLuck's flower stand, looking at all of the different assortments of flowers. I was quick to buy, just as fast as a man would, trying to impress his wife. I got a mixture of Marigolds,Daffodils,tulips,irises, and Lillie's. I reached her doorstep and stopped and cleared my throat then knocked, I could barely make it out but I heard her say "coming!"she opened the door.

The door flew open, causing a gust of air to brush against me. Her eyes grew wide at the sight of me, they grew even bigger when she saw the bouquet of flowers in my hoof. She said "are these for me!? You're too kind!" while taking them from me, "come in, come in! I've got some muffins in the oven!" she said quickly. Her house was medium sized, it was more up to date then mine, and it had a more feeling of coziness. There wasn't as much of the unnecessary and ridiculous muffin accessories to her home, but she was wearing a chefs hat, which had a muffin on it. The hat brought up another thought, her outfit in the dream. she was waiting for the muffins to be done when I looked over at her, I imagined that outfit on her body and got an flare of arousal, I shooked the image out of my head and came back to reality.

Derpy took out the muffins and placed them on the counter, there were little hearts on them, which were made of chocolate. She grabbed two muffins and came over to me ever so cheerly. She hummed a little tune while handing me one, we locked eyes while she was doing so, causing her to blush slightly. She sat down next to me, a little too close for just being friends. She ate the muffin with lady like small bites, savoring the muffin and this momment. She laid her head on my shoulder, surprising me and catching me off guard. "I'm glad we met eachother, and that you decided to come over and talk to me, you're so kind and sweet, you're not like any other pony I've ever met." At that moment I realized, if it wasn't for those muffins, and her little obsession with them, we probably wouldn't have ever met. I smiled, and leaned over, and kissed her on the forehead as she dozed off.